centipede_damascus
+6 -2
Man, you just don't pick up a cat ever. They don't like it at all.
Man, you just don't pick up a cat ever. They don't like it at all.
spectre
+3 -1
Unless you are a teenage girl. They can get away with it. My stepdaughters can.
Unless you are a teenage girl. They can get away with it. My stepdaughters can.
songbirdspectre
+1 -0
yep. i am proof.
yep. i am proof.
straw
+10 -0
You're spectre's setpdaughter?
You're spectre's setpdaughter?
tasteful
+9 -0
it is plausible based on the names
it is plausible based on the names
fosters
+15 -0
My old cat was mean as hell all her life, and the only person she EVER let pick her up without shredding (aside from me on very rare occasions) was this loud little 5 or 6 year old girl who lived next door to us. The first time I saw her pick the cat up before I could stop her it felt like one of those dreams where you're running away from something in slow motion. I was thinking "oh Jesus this kid is dead and I'm going to have to explain to her parents why my cat tore her face off NOOOOOO" but the cat just quietly put up with it.
My old cat was mean as hell all her life, and the only person she EVER let pick her up without shredding (aside from me on very rare occasions) was this loud little 5 or 6 year old girl who lived next door to us. The first time I saw her pick the cat up before I could stop her it felt like one of those dreams where you're running away from something in slow motion. I was thinking "oh Jesus this kid is dead and I'm going to have to explain to her parents why my cat tore her face off NOOOOOO" but the cat just quietly put up with it.
canusdivinus
+7 -0
Cats know the difference between kids and adults. They'll take hella abuse from kids, because they understand that kids don't know better.
Cats know the difference between kids and adults. They'll take hella abuse from kids, because they understand that kids don't know better.
tekende
+1 -0
Exactly. Dogs are usually the same way, provided they haven't had a horrible abusive owner or something.
Exactly. Dogs are usually the same way, provided they haven't had a horrible abusive owner or something.
tfaironpirate
+0 -0
This sounds like pet-lovery, but is actually mostly accepted scientific fact.
This sounds like pet-lovery, but is actually mostly accepted scientific fact.
dusty
+6 -0
I think many pets understand the ass-whooping that might come from harming a kid. My grandpa had this big German Sheppard that would growl and snap at anyone but him, but if a 4 year old grandchild sat on it's back, grabbed it's ears like the reins of a horse and started bouncing, it just sat there with the uncomfortable tolerance of a man getting a prostate exam.
I think many pets understand the ass-whooping that might come from harming a kid. My grandpa had this big German Sheppard that would growl and snap at anyone but him, but if a 4 year old grandchild sat on it's back, grabbed it's ears like the reins of a horse and started bouncing, it just sat there with the uncomfortable tolerance of a man getting a prostate exam.
glorify
+0 -0
What a fantastic metaphor that is.
What a fantastic metaphor that is.
dybrar
+0 -0
The German Shepherd's uncomfortableness is so accurately conveyed.
The German Shepherd's uncomfortableness is so accurately conveyed.
closefriend
+9 -0
I pick up my 25 lb. cat every day. I even held him on his back every day for the first two years of his life. It teaches him who is in charge.
I pick up my 25 lb. cat every day. I even held him on his back every day for the first two years of his life. It teaches him who is in charge.
xiaomimi
+3 -0
Dang! My boyfriend does the same thing with our cat, and for the same reason. I did not think that was a habit that extended beyond his idiosyncrasies.
Dang! My boyfriend does the same thing with our cat, and for the same reason. I did not think that was a habit that extended beyond his idiosyncrasies.
blueloggy
+38 -0
Dang! My boyfriend does the same thing with ME, and for the same reason!
He is a terrible boyfriend.
Dang! My boyfriend does the same thing with ME, and for the same reason!
He is a terrible boyfriend.
snowman
+0 -0
That seems mean, kind of.
That seems mean, kind of.
gouldgonewild
+4 -0
This is what I plan on doing to my children.
This is what I plan on doing to my children.
tekende
+0 -0
Well, yes, children under two like being picked up.
Well, yes, children under two like being picked up.
slalvation
+0 -1
My cats love it, if you're family.
My cats love it, if you're family.
hrm
+2 -0
when anybody picks up my mom's cat, he basically becomes one with you.
when anybody picks up my mom's cat, he basically becomes one with you.
idsyen
+15 -0
It seems clear that different cats have different personalities. For instance, some come from circumstances and have depression, whereas some have alcoholism and think it's rad.
It seems clear that different cats have different personalities. For instance, some come from circumstances and have depression, whereas some have alcoholism and think it's rad.
meringue
+0 -0
It just depends how they are raised. Cats get a lot of stereotypes from things that simply spur up as a result of very passively caring for them.
My cat is a real people... cat. Always wants attention and to be held.
It just depends how they are raised. Cats get a lot of stereotypes from things that simply spur up as a result of very passively caring for them.
My cat is a real people... cat. Always wants attention and to be held.
shmuckeles
+2 -1
don't pick one up like THAT, that's for sure
don't pick one up like THAT, that's for sure
jstegall
+7 -1
Man, I just wouldn't pick up a thong wearin' cat at all. Besides, with those glasses and the gold chain, Raymo Smookles looks like he's in the Yakuza.
Man, I just wouldn't pick up a thong wearin' cat at all. Besides, with those glasses and the gold chain, Raymo Smookles looks like he's in the Yakuza.
asherdan
+0 -0
A comment left by asherdan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zefiel, SoManyWhales, cognitonaut, profbobo, stoned_lightning)
A comment left by asherdan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zefiel, SoManyWhales, cognitonaut, profbobo, stoned_lightning)
howard
+5 -0
The tiniest martini glass that ever there was.
The tiniest martini glass that ever there was.
hellofyellin
+4 -0
"Cooked up real good" is one of my favorite Achewood-isms to use basically anytime, such as making a simple pasta.
"Cooked up real good" is one of my favorite Achewood-isms to use basically anytime, such as making a simple pasta.
hellofditties
+0 -0
Except that the quote is "baked."
Except that the quote is "baked."
hellofyellin
+0 -0
I am enthusiastic about this funny-strip.
I am enthusiastic about this funny-strip.
hellofditties
+0 -0
I retract my statement.
I retract my statement.
hellofyellin
+0 -0
Thank you. Martini?
Thank you. Martini?
hellofditties
+0 -0
I was kinda hoping you'd mention how awesome our screen names are.
I was kinda hoping you'd mention how awesome our screen names are.
hellofyellin
+0 -0
We are so awesome. So you don't want a martini? I made one just for you.
We are so awesome. So you don't want a martini? I made one just for you.
hellofditties
+2 -0
Is it chilled up real good?
Is it chilled up real good?
hellofyellin
+1 -0
Chilled and stirred. Ice in the glass, hell of class.
Chilled and stirred. Ice in the glass, hell of class.
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
she is 18 / you are arrested.
she is 18 / you are arrested.
hellofyellin
+1 -0
Ah. So I should check the agey thing up there on the icon, huh?
YOU want one?
Ah. So I should check the agey thing up there on the icon, huh?
YOU want one?
fineoakstructure
+5 -0
HELL YES
BOUT TIME
HELL YES
BOUT TIME
hellofditties
+0 -0
WAIT! If I drink it over here it's okay, right? Fax it to me.
WAIT! If I drink it over here it's okay, right? Fax it to me.
evilrobot
+0 -0
I liked this series of strips because it shows Chris has a genuine affection for his characters, as do we all
I liked this series of strips because it shows Chris has a genuine affection for his characters, as do we all
saulbellow
+1 -0
Rarely did Charles Schultz pick up a protesting Snoopy.
Rarely did Charles Schultz pick up a protesting Snoopy.
tombsgrave
+4 -0
... baked hot dogs?
... baked hot dogs?
andrew_
+0 -0
that's what I was thinking!
that's what I was thinking!
spectre
+0 -1
Ray's recipe in RECIPES FOR A LADY OR A MAN specifies that they must be cooked in a small amount of water on the stovetop. They MUST be!
Ray's recipe in RECIPES FOR A LADY OR A MAN specifies that they must be cooked in a small amount of water on the stovetop. They MUST be!
dropkickpikachu
+6 -0
Simmer the frankfurter.
It muft simmer!
Simmer the frankfurter.
It muft simmer!
choosebro
+3 -0
Your Avatar gives a little bit extra to each message.
Your Avatar gives a little bit extra to each message.
fuckalgebra
+0 -0
They're actually really good if you do it right. They come out a lot like grilled ones. It was this strip inspired me to try it.
They're actually really good if you do it right. They come out a lot like grilled ones. It was this strip inspired me to try it.
spectre
+2 -1
Alt text: "A good birthday present is to order the book"
Alt text: "A good birthday present is to order the book"
thisdoggisproice
+0 -0
It looks like Chris is trying to throttle Ray's entire body, yet still making extra sure not to touch the thong.
It looks like Chris is trying to throttle Ray's entire body, yet still making extra sure not to touch the thong.
hpk
+1 -0
It almost looks like he's trying to wring juice from Ray, like a towel
...dipped in juice I guess.
It almost looks like he's trying to wring juice from Ray, like a towel
...dipped in juice I guess.
gussiejives
+0 -0
I'd be nervous about picking up a thong-wearing, bipedal cat that can talk. Especially when he's clearly been drinking.
I'd be nervous about picking up a thong-wearing, bipedal cat that can talk. Especially when he's clearly been drinking.
aperson
+0 -2
Look at Onstads bit stupid hands. Strong chin though.
Look at Onstads bit stupid hands. Strong chin though.
snowman
+5 -0
They look like big, strong hands, don't they?
They look like big, strong hands, don't they?
landowmpg
+0 -0
Is this a Never Ending Story reference? If so: nice.
Is this a Never Ending Story reference? If so: nice.
aperson
+0 -0
Assetbar: sorry I criticised Chris Onstad's hands and did a typo. Lames accepted.
Assetbar: sorry I criticised Chris Onstad's hands and did a typo. Lames accepted.
milksteak
+0 -0
Those are the hands magic come from.
Those are the hands magic come from.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
That is not a hands
That is not a hands
shoinan
+1 -0
It is not cool to pick up a player, even if it is your birthday.
It is not cool to pick up a player, even if it is your birthday.
dasilodavi
+0 -0
I know a cat who does this exact same thing.
I know a cat who does this exact same thing.
tekende
+0 -0
It talks about hot dogs?
It talks about hot dogs?
dasilodavi
+0 -0
No, it hangs out all chill like but bitches incessantly when you try to pick it up.
No, it hangs out all chill like but bitches incessantly when you try to pick it up.
faits
+1 -0
oh you mean every cat ever
oh you mean every cat ever
undyingsong
+0 -0
Except for those cats which like to sit innocently in your lap, and then attempt to eat your arm. :(
Except for those cats which like to sit innocently in your lap, and then attempt to eat your arm. :(
rowboat
+13 -0
This is where Lie Bot got his shoes. Lie Bot wears Onstad's shoes. Michael J. Fox had nothing to do with it. That robot has deceived me for the last time. This time I mean it.
This is where Lie Bot got his shoes. Lie Bot wears Onstad's shoes. Michael J. Fox had nothing to do with it. That robot has deceived me for the last time. This time I mean it.
nucleargeranium
+0 -0
hell yes, oven hotdogs are the bomb! Unlike oven FRIES, which just get hella soggy and nasty. Especially Pat's oven fries.
hell yes, oven hotdogs are the bomb! Unlike oven FRIES, which just get hella soggy and nasty. Especially Pat's oven fries.
steerpike66
+0 -0
I don't like seeing our guys in proportion. I hate proportion. Everything should be hella skewed.
I don't like seeing our guys in proportion. I hate proportion. Everything should be hella skewed.
dovey
+0 -0
I think my favourite Achewoods all end with Onstad picking a cat up.
I think my favourite Achewoods all end with Onstad picking a cat up.
jonmw
+11 -0
Onstad is not using proper cat-lifting technique. Here is a diagram demonstrating the correct method:
[IMGS OFF]
Onstad is not using proper cat-lifting technique. Here is a diagram demonstrating the correct method:
[IMGS OFF]
babeeazz
+0 -0
ray is a very tiny cat. when my cats stand up on their hind legs they reach quite a bit over my knee. ray is a midgie-kittie.
ray is a very tiny cat. when my cats stand up on their hind legs they reach quite a bit over my knee. ray is a midgie-kittie.
cracklewater
+1 -0
Onstad may be a GIANT MAN.
Onstad may be a GIANT MAN.
origotoshi
+0 -0
I think you may just be short... If a cat stood up next to me, it would probably be around knee-height, and I'm 6 feet~.
I think you may just be short... If a cat stood up next to me, it would probably be around knee-height, and I'm 6 feet~.
carlyle
+0 -0
A person in Achewood? This hasn't happened until the Toilet Party!
A person in Achewood? This hasn't happened until the Toilet Party!
Man, seeing Ray being treated like a cat is hell of weird.