fictions
+0 -0
Philosophy is my major and I too am against cover charges. Foucault would have been against them as well.
Philosophy is my major and I too am against cover charges. Foucault would have been against them as well.
hatstand_mcq
+1 -0
I disagree. Foucault was well known to dive into a gay sauna like a rat up a drainpipe.
I disagree. Foucault was well known to dive into a gay sauna like a rat up a drainpipe.
granularsilica
+0 -0
He could really swing his pendulum.
He could really swing his pendulum.
fictions
+0 -0
Different Foucault
Different Foucault
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Interesting use of simile.
Interesting use of simile.
newspaperdrone
+1 -1
Everybody really needs to stop dropping the f-bomb up in here.
Everybody really needs to stop dropping the f-bomb up in here.
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Foucault you, man.
Foucault you, man.
muh
+1 -0
achewood is becoming more and more like dinosaur comics every day.
achewood is becoming more and more like dinosaur comics every day.
muh
+15 -0
err wait no I mean every week or two.
err wait no I mean every week or two.
puguglypress
+0 -0
Well put man, well put!
Well put man, well put!
miaou
+0 -0
That's what she said?
That's what she said?
howl
+0 -0
No.
No.
firedmyass
+0 -0
that be a ding or a glory? -- or perhaps an unstable alloy of both? (It is not clear to me from context.)
that be a ding or a glory? -- or perhaps an unstable alloy of both? (It is not clear to me from context.)
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
Congratulations, dinglory , you are the confused, unclear phrase of the week.
Congratulations, dinglory , you are the confused, unclear phrase of the week.
firedmyass
+0 -0
achievement is a goddam burden. i am running out of room for all of these trophies.
achievement is a goddam burden. i am running out of room for all of these trophies.
smallblackdog
+0 -0
As was Rimbaud - see 'Rimbaud first blood'
As was Rimbaud - see 'Rimbaud first blood'
thaes
+0 -0
How would "banana factory" work as a slur? Does it refer to bananas going on a conveyor belt through some kind of banana processing machinery in a banana processing plant? And if so, should this slur only be used to the kind of homosexuals who... process numerous bananas, if you allow such a crude expression.
How would "banana factory" work as a slur? Does it refer to bananas going on a conveyor belt through some kind of banana processing machinery in a banana processing plant? And if so, should this slur only be used to the kind of homosexuals who... process numerous bananas, if you allow such a crude expression.
fictions
+5 -0
Or it could just be that 'banana' is a euphemism for the penis. Ockham's Razor dude. Its philosophy.
Or it could just be that 'banana' is a euphemism for the penis. Ockham's Razor dude. Its philosophy.
spectre
+0 -0
Keep the razor away from your penis. Just sayin'.
Keep the razor away from your penis. Just sayin'.
expellens
+3 -1
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
greatjob
+0 -0
Do you think Martha made this out of beets and safety pins? I do.
Do you think Martha made this out of beets and safety pins? I do.
mangtastic
+0 -0
Maybe turnips and aspic
Maybe turnips and aspic
wingspan
+3 -0
They prefer to be called "Latino".
They prefer to be called "Latino".
wazza
+1 -0
Suuuch a special plaaace...
Suuuch a special plaaace...
xi
+1 -0
No, it seems universal - like the process a "banana" would go through at a "factory" would be the one that takes a firm, ripe banana and turns it into a limp, purposeless husk. In that case, there are lots of banana factories. You are even your own banana's factory. Sometimes. When there's nothing on TV.
No, it seems universal - like the process a "banana" would go through at a "factory" would be the one that takes a firm, ripe banana and turns it into a limp, purposeless husk. In that case, there are lots of banana factories. You are even your own banana's factory. Sometimes. When there's nothing on TV.
hamscout
+0 -0
If Todd is a banana factory, he is really turnin' them out!
If Todd is a banana factory, he is really turnin' them out!
mintyhelminthes
+13 -0
suckin' dick bought this banana factory
suckin' dick bought this banana factory
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Todd is only tool-pusher in great banana factory of life.
Todd is only tool-pusher in great banana factory of life.
granularsilica
+1 -0
We're down to two peelers and our inserter is down. This is no way to run a banana factory! Call Todd.
We're down to two peelers and our inserter is down. This is no way to run a banana factory! Call Todd.
xi
+2 -0
A sensitive squirrel entirely in silhouette? Where do I even sign?
A sensitive squirrel entirely in silhouette? Where do I even sign?
cracklewater
+1 -0
You don't. Todd does not accept written applications.
Phone-only.
You don't. Todd does not accept written applications.
Phone-only.
mrfedora
+2 -0
Phone-only? Oooh-la- la
Phone-only? Oooh-la- la
hatstand_mcq
+11 -0
If you want to contact Todd you have to get onto your roof and shine a special signal on the sky. While you are on the roof Todd will steal your car.
If you want to contact Todd you have to get onto your roof and shine a special signal on the sky. While you are on the roof Todd will steal your car.
cracklewater
+3 -0
It's in the icons at the top of his escort ad - no writin'.
Dude is illiterate, after all.
It's in the icons at the top of his escort ad - no writin'.
Dude is illiterate, after all.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
A comment left by cpnglxynchos was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, Fictions, EvilPerson)
A comment left by cpnglxynchos was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, Fictions, EvilPerson)
fictions
+0 -0
A comment left by fictions was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by SupahLovah, XI, firedmyass)
A comment left by fictions was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by SupahLovah, XI, firedmyass)
xi
+0 -0
It's cute how you're not cute at all.
It's cute how you're not cute at all.
thegoblins
+0 -0
You are cutest when you spit green pus and your eyes roll back in your head.
You are cutest when you spit green pus and your eyes roll back in your head.
mattbeetee
+0 -0
I stopped coming to this Assetbar section of Achewood for like 6 months, and when I come back all the people are obsessed with being the first place comment-making person.
Am I missing something? Does getting in first place put you on a special treasure registrar?
I stopped coming to this Assetbar section of Achewood for like 6 months, and when I come back all the people are obsessed with being the first place comment-making person.
Am I missing something? Does getting in first place put you on a special treasure registrar?
granularsilica
+0 -0
It seems to be an experience that changes one, permanently.
It seems to be an experience that changes one, permanently.
thegoblins
+1 -0
The Ministry of Special Prizes takes note of your name.
The Ministry of Special Prizes takes note of your name.
scion
+0 -0
It's counter-intuitive, eh? Seems to me that to enjoy Achewood a gal/guy has gotta like to read. But the culture of "First Post Equals Best (Please Don't Lame Me Because I'm First)" indicates that not many folks are reading the comments past the first couple posts. Maybe if we had QwarkXPress to fancy-up our posts?
It's counter-intuitive, eh? Seems to me that to enjoy Achewood a gal/guy has gotta like to read. But the culture of "First Post Equals Best (Please Don't Lame Me Because I'm First)" indicates that not many folks are reading the comments past the first couple posts. Maybe if we had QwarkXPress to fancy-up our posts?
muh
+1 -0
I doubt that many people lurk on assetbar. the conversation around here isn't too interesting most of the time. it's mostly just idle chit that that one might overhear while in public, like say, on the bus. If you're participating in the chit chat, then it has some sort of relevance, but otherwise, if a couple a folks are chatting next to you on the bus, generally you true to tune it out because it's usually not that interesting and you have no idea of the context.
I doubt that many people lurk on assetbar. the conversation around here isn't too interesting most of the time. it's mostly just idle chit that that one might overhear while in public, like say, on the bus. If you're participating in the chit chat, then it has some sort of relevance, but otherwise, if a couple a folks are chatting next to you on the bus, generally you true to tune it out because it's usually not that interesting and you have no idea of the context.
streever
+0 -0
Have you ever used internet before? You act like this is unique to achewood.
Have you ever used internet before? You act like this is unique to achewood.
xi
+0 -0
Is ham currency somewhere? I'd hate to think of such a place. Greasy meat hands. The smell. The smell everywhere. Jewish people just out of their damn minds until they finally have to flee.
Is ham currency somewhere? I'd hate to think of such a place. Greasy meat hands. The smell. The smell everywhere. Jewish people just out of their damn minds until they finally have to flee.
hamscout
+17 -0
daidai
+0 -0
A comment left by daidai was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Scorpio_nadir, Comrade_Tom, Omegatron)
A comment left by daidai was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Scorpio_nadir, Comrade_Tom, Omegatron)
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
i don't care if they lame you, empty Nice Pete comment! i still think you're wonderful!
i don't care if they lame you, empty Nice Pete comment! i still think you're wonderful!
coldfrog
+0 -0
This ham courtesy of www.kingdomofloathing.com
This ham courtesy of www.kingdomofloathing.com
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Nonsense, it's in colour. But it is an obscure cultural reference, so I understand your confusion.
Nonsense, it's in colour. But it is an obscure cultural reference, so I understand your confusion.
spazdor
+0 -0
How much does that weigh?
How much does that weigh?
scorpio_nadir
+4 -0
Hamsterdam, mythical kingdom of Prince Hamlet. Shakespeare's first take.
Hamsterdam, mythical kingdom of Prince Hamlet. Shakespeare's first take.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
is that where hamthrax(swine flu) originated?
is that where hamthrax(swine flu) originated?
spectre
+0 -0
Alabama
Alabama
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
The Alhambra.
The Alhambra.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Nottingham?
Durham?
Soham?
Oldham?
Birmingham?
Evesham?
Nottingham?
Durham?
Soham?
Oldham?
Birmingham?
Evesham?
newspaperdrone
+0 -0
I'm from Nottingham, and due to the current weakness of the pound I can confirm that we have indeed resorted to using pig by-products as currency. A whole pig will fetch you roughly £3,000 on the bacon black market.
I'm from Nottingham, and due to the current weakness of the pound I can confirm that we have indeed resorted to using pig by-products as currency. A whole pig will fetch you roughly £3,000 on the bacon black market.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
I'm from Durham and the other day i saw a woman wheeling a barrow full of piglets to a bakers just to pay for a loaf of bread. It was like something out of weimar germany....
I'm from Durham and the other day i saw a woman wheeling a barrow full of piglets to a bakers just to pay for a loaf of bread. It was like something out of weimar germany....
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
I was in Durham about five years ago: I bought a round consisting of 4 pints of ordinary, two large G&Ts, two glasses of wine and a lime and soda, plus crisps and pickled eggs, and it came to less than two piglets. These days a fashionable bar will charge one piglet for a 33cl bottle of Heineken.
I was in Durham about five years ago: I bought a round consisting of 4 pints of ordinary, two large G&Ts, two glasses of wine and a lime and soda, plus crisps and pickled eggs, and it came to less than two piglets. These days a fashionable bar will charge one piglet for a 33cl bottle of Heineken.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
I blame Gordon Brown. If he spent more time running the country and less time on pills i wouldn't be up up to my knees in pig-muck.
I blame Gordon Brown. If he spent more time running the country and less time on pills i wouldn't be up up to my knees in pig-muck.
cracklewater
+0 -0
I've spent quite a bit of time in Evesham. It's a fucking hole.
When they got their first McDonalds in 1997, the whole town turned up every night for a few months, queuing round the block for a taste of the fried manna.
It was like an alien mothership had touched down on the outskirts of town and was offering eternal life and blowjobs on a first-come-first-served basis.
I've spent quite a bit of time in Evesham. It's a fucking hole.
When they got their first McDonalds in 1997, the whole town turned up every night for a few months, queuing round the block for a taste of the fried manna.
It was like an alien mothership had touched down on the outskirts of town and was offering eternal life and blowjobs on a first-come-first-served basis.
muh
+0 -0
mmmm extraterrestrial blowjobs.
mmmm extraterrestrial blowjobs.
wazza
+1 -0
That doesn't sound so fun...
[IMGS OFF]
That doesn't sound so fun...
[IMGS OFF]
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
a Hollywood french-kiss scene never gripped you so...
a Hollywood french-kiss scene never gripped you so...
falseprophet
+0 -0
But what if it's a race that has three tongues?!
But what if it's a race that has three tongues?!
cracklewater
+0 -0
Mayor McCheese has several layers of oral pleasure to offer. The bit between his orange Kraft cheese-like square and his MRM/beef anus patty can flay a man's glans in 60 seconds flat.
Mayor McCheese has several layers of oral pleasure to offer. The bit between his orange Kraft cheese-like square and his MRM/beef anus patty can flay a man's glans in 60 seconds flat.
firedmyass
+0 -0
We once got a set of tractor tires for half of a fine, honest hog. The left half, as I recall (hog's left).
We once got a set of tractor tires for half of a fine, honest hog. The left half, as I recall (hog's left).
maltese
+2 -0
Church-face retards. As a former churchgoer, I find this comment both harsh and appropriate.
Church-face retards. As a former churchgoer, I find this comment both harsh and appropriate.
hatstand_mcq
+2 -0
'Church-face' - the substantive compound adjective that begs to be read as a noun adjunct.
'Church-face' - the substantive compound adjective that begs to be read as a noun adjunct.
maltese
+2 -0
I ain't so sure what that means but respect
I ain't so sure what that means but respect
comrade_tom
+4 -0
Church-face is incidentally the synth heavy new single of flamboyant christian dance music minx "Lady Hosanna", she who recorded "Just dance (but make time to pray)"
Church-face is incidentally the synth heavy new single of flamboyant christian dance music minx "Lady Hosanna", she who recorded "Just dance (but make time to pray)"
thegoblins
+3 -0
I want to ride on your crucifix.
I want to ride on your crucifix.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Ch-ch-ch-church face, ch-ch-church face
(Mum mum mum mah)
Ch-ch-ch-church face, ch-ch-church face
(Mum mum mum mah)
(Mum mum mum mah)
(Mum mum mum mah)
I won't tell you that I love you
Kiss or hug you
Cause I'm confessin' with my muffin
I'm not lying I'm just stunnin' with my love-glue-gunning
Ch-ch-ch-church face, ch-ch-church face
(Mum mum mum mah)
Ch-ch-ch-church face, ch-ch-church face
(Mum mum mum mah)
(Mum mum mum mah)
(Mum mum mum mah)
I won't tell you that I love you
Kiss or hug you
Cause I'm confessin' with my muffin
I'm not lying I'm just stunnin' with my love-glue-gunning
wazza
+0 -0
https://www.divine-interventions.com/jackhammer.html
This crucifix?
https://www.divine-interventions.com/jackhammer.html
This crucifix?
thegoblins
+0 -0
I was telling a group of my friends today that whenever I say something that proves my horribleness as a human being, I feel both ashamed and fiercely proud. I bet the person who started this company feels the same way.
I was telling a group of my friends today that whenever I say something that proves my horribleness as a human being, I feel both ashamed and fiercely proud. I bet the person who started this company feels the same way.
stereo
+2 -0
I Want To Rock And Roll All Night (And Pray To Every Deity)
I Want To Rock And Roll All Night (And Pray To Every Deity)
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
church
face-grind
church
face-grind
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
that is what me and gobs call 'the weekend'
that is what me and gobs call 'the weekend'
bluemoon72
+0 -0
I keep looking at this picture, and it keeps striking me as odd. What is going on here?
I keep looking at this picture, and it keeps striking me as odd. What is going on here?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
if you are grinding on somebody, there is no room for Jesus. it's comedy of the contradictory.
if you are grinding on somebody, there is no room for Jesus. it's comedy of the contradictory.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
No, I mean the actual [i]photo[/] you posted. It's making my eyes feel funny.
No, I mean the actual [i]photo[/] you posted. It's making my eyes feel funny.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
DAMMIT
DAMMIT
falseprophet
+0 -0
It kind of looks like the girl has only one leg.
It kind of looks like the girl has only one leg.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Yeah, and her perspective/proportion is all awry...and there's something weird on the right side of the brick doorway arch behind her...I am just confused.
Yeah, and her perspective/proportion is all awry...and there's something weird on the right side of the brick doorway arch behind her...I am just confused.
genocidefish
+0 -0
Hm... if you saw this card out of context, who would you presume to be the target audience?
Hm... if you saw this card out of context, who would you presume to be the target audience?
farqussus
+1 -0
your mum
your mum
pmbarrett
+1 -0
's banana factory
's banana factory
luckypyjamas
+0 -0
people who don't recognize amateur graphic design probable
that is not a good business card
people who don't recognize amateur graphic design probable
that is not a good business card
luckypyjamas
+0 -0
These are good business cards
These are good business cards
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
[url]https://www.meatcards.com/[/i]
[url]https://www.meatcards.com/[/i]
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
https://www.meatcards.com/
https://www.meatcards.com/
luckypyjamas
+0 -0
is that for real? i love the idea but they don't seem terribly professional..
is that for real? i love the idea but they don't seem terribly professional..
firedmyass
+0 -0
Earth-humor is hard.
Earth-humor is hard.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it seems like they will be soon enough.
that's so rad.
it seems like they will be soon enough.
that's so rad.
mockereo
+0 -0
[url=www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YBxeDN4tbk/]YOUR BUSINESS CARD IS CRAP[/url]
[url=www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YBxeDN4tbk/]YOUR BUSINESS CARD IS CRAP[/url]
mockereo
+0 -0
YOUR BUSINESS CARD IS CRAP
YOUR BUSINESS CARD IS CRAP
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
your bbcode is carp.
your bbcode is carp.
octafish
+4 -0
your spelling is koi
your spelling is koi
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
as in koi-nfusing!
as in koi-nfusing!
muh
+0 -0
youtube doesn't appreciate a trailing directory marker symbol thingy dilineator forward slash. I'm not sure why this is such a common mistake. It's starting to piss me off.
youtube doesn't appreciate a trailing directory marker symbol thingy dilineator forward slash. I'm not sure why this is such a common mistake. It's starting to piss me off.
mockereo
+0 -0
man fuck internets. i can't figure these tubes out at all
man fuck internets. i can't figure these tubes out at all
firedmyass
+0 -0
The card's aggressively non-standard proportions is a bold and innovative approach. Such upside-your-box thinking would appeal to those who live on the fringes of society - art students, marketing professionals, diabetics, etc.
The card's aggressively non-standard proportions is a bold and innovative approach. Such upside-your-box thinking would appeal to those who live on the fringes of society - art students, marketing professionals, diabetics, etc.
hatstand_mcq
+2 -0
No marketing professional would be interested in a 'sensitive' male escort. Not unless they were planning to show him photos of an ill puppy being slapped, and then feast on his sweet savour of his suffering.
No marketing professional would be interested in a 'sensitive' male escort. Not unless they were planning to show him photos of an ill puppy being slapped, and then feast on his sweet savour of his suffering.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
people who would fall for a prank
people who would fall for a prank
brokeaccount
+12 -0
Congratulations on not throwing up for an entire strip, Todd.
Congratulations on not throwing up for an entire strip, Todd.
deus
+2 -0
This will virtually destroy large population of sensitive and depressed men and women.
This will virtually destroy large population of sensitive and depressed men and women.
firedmyass
+0 -0
Many of them would have self-published some terrible poetry, so it's better for everyone this way.
Many of them would have self-published some terrible poetry, so it's better for everyone this way.
greenkoolayd
+1 -0
i keep my terrible poetry in a livejournal where it belongs.
i keep my terrible poetry in a livejournal where it belongs.
deus
+0 -0
GOOD LORD! OFFCOURSE!
WE need to infiltrate Todd into "twilight" circles.
GOOD LORD! OFFCOURSE!
WE need to infiltrate Todd into "twilight" circles.
deus
+0 -0
But beware. one of them is killer at programming java applets.
But beware. one of them is killer at programming java applets.
wazza
+0 -0
Todd selling himself as a sensitive prostitute. I can see this ending really well...
Todd selling himself as a sensitive prostitute. I can see this ending really well...
varnish
+0 -0
Todd seems to grow as the strip progresses and he transforms into Sensitive Todd
Todd seems to grow as the strip progresses and he transforms into Sensitive Todd
johnnylandmine
+0 -0
Mr. Onstad, please start a story arc that stays on the story it started on until it is finished again.
Mr. Onstad, please start a story arc that stays on the story it started on until it is finished again.
fuckin_wizard
+0 -0
I'd really rather read about Todd's escort adventures than T being bad at strip clubs. They are a simple thing.
I'd really rather read about Todd's escort adventures than T being bad at strip clubs. They are a simple thing.
johnnylandmine
+1 -0
I would rather read about Cornelius writing his book than either of those things.
I would rather read about Cornelius writing his book than either of those things.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Are you sayin' this strip s-s-s-sucks? Cause t-t-that's what I'm hearin' you s-s-sayin!
Are you sayin' this strip s-s-s-sucks? Cause t-t-that's what I'm hearin' you s-s-sayin!
quazifuji
+0 -0
The weird shifts in plot kind of make up for the lack of one-off strips in between, though, at least for me. We still get to see a lot of random stuff happen this way, even though it's all part of one big story arc. I think part of what's fun about Achewood story arcs sometimes is the bizarreness of their plots. I found the shifts in last arc's plot pretty entertaining, even if I was curious to see the Sapphic Erotica contest in its entirety.
Maybe having another arc as crazy as the last one isn't necessary, but it won't necessarilly happen. Personally, I'd only have found Cornelius' strip club books entertaining for so long, and now we might finally be getting a Todd story arc, which I think the majority of Achewood readers are quite happy about.
The weird shifts in plot kind of make up for the lack of one-off strips in between, though, at least for me. We still get to see a lot of random stuff happen this way, even though it's all part of one big story arc. I think part of what's fun about Achewood story arcs sometimes is the bizarreness of their plots. I found the shifts in last arc's plot pretty entertaining, even if I was curious to see the Sapphic Erotica contest in its entirety.
Maybe having another arc as crazy as the last one isn't necessary, but it won't necessarilly happen. Personally, I'd only have found Cornelius' strip club books entertaining for so long, and now we might finally be getting a Todd story arc, which I think the majority of Achewood readers are quite happy about.
lucid
+0 -0
Not only that, but seemingly random elements like can often wind up being quite relevant when the arc draws to a close.
Maybe... Maybe Todd and Teodor will wind up running a strip club together. And by that I mean Teodor will write an overcomplicated business plan while Todd embezzles money to do cocaines.
Not only that, but seemingly random elements like can often wind up being quite relevant when the arc draws to a close.
Maybe... Maybe Todd and Teodor will wind up running a strip club together. And by that I mean Teodor will write an overcomplicated business plan while Todd embezzles money to do cocaines.
wazza
+0 -0
Cocaine's been done. Todd needs a new drug.
Cocaine's been done. Todd needs a new drug.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
one that won't make him sick...
one that won't make him sick...
octafish
+0 -0
Now I'm nervous...
Now I'm nervous...
firedmyass
+8 -0
"Mr. Onstad, purple is my favorite color. I would prefer if you used more purple in your cartoon."
"Mr. Onstad, purple is my favorite color. I would prefer if you used more purple in your cartoon."
dangelder
+1 -0
"Today is my birthday. Maybe you could talk about me for a change."
"Today is my birthday. Maybe you could talk about me for a change."
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
[i]You will soon be going on a short journey.
[i]You will soon be going on a short journey.
johnnylandmine
+0 -0
Actually my favorite color is "vaguely reminiscent of an old Mac 128k display" so on that end he has me covered remarkably well.
Actually my favorite color is "vaguely reminiscent of an old Mac 128k display" so on that end he has me covered remarkably well.
expellens
+0 -0
...drub, drub.
tink!
...drub, drub.
tink!
woky
+0 -0
Why Todd must walk this earth with the bright-eyed liars and church-faced retards shall ever plague him.
Why Todd must walk this earth with the bright-eyed liars and church-faced retards shall ever plague him.
octafish
+1 -0
Who wants a male escort with 25% off? That could be the 25% you need.
Who wants a male escort with 25% off? That could be the 25% you need.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i don't think it figures out to be 25% of the total (though some would argue that without it, you would be 0%.)
i don't think it figures out to be 25% of the total (though some would argue that without it, you would be 0%.)
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
he means, the 25% that would be absent would include the dingdong, mouth, butthole, hands, and or feet.
he means, the 25% that would be absent would include the dingdong, mouth, butthole, hands, and or feet.
thegoblins
+2 -0
As long as he had a mouth and hands and knew how to use them, the rest is optional.
As long as he had a mouth and hands and knew how to use them, the rest is optional.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Especially the feet.
Especially the feet.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
is that a thing with you?
is that a thing with you?
bluemoon72
+1 -0
No, I mean if he had a mouth and hands and knew how to use them, then I wouldn't want him to walk away! (leaving the feet completely unnecessary.) *sigh*
No, I mean if he had a mouth and hands and knew how to use them, then I wouldn't want him to walk away! (leaving the feet completely unnecessary.) *sigh*
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
oh. totally got it now. thank you for humoring the slow kid.
oh. totally got it now. thank you for humoring the slow kid.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Anytime. :P
Anytime. :P
thegoblins
+0 -0
d'awwww
d'awwww
firedmyass
+0 -0
get a shoe box, you two.
get a shoe box, you two.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
How about a Schroedinger box?
How about a Schroedinger box?
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
google search time!
google search time!
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
If you had to google that, you don't belong here with the adults.
If you had to google that, you don't belong here with the adults.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
i hope your standards keep you warm at night.
i hope your standards keep you warm at night.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Don't be an ass. No one can know everything.
Don't be an ass. No one can know everything.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
That "don't be an ass" was for scorpio_nadir...
That "don't be an ass" was for scorpio_nadir...
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
That was payback sass for 2 strips ago. He knows what he did.
That was payback sass for 2 strips ago. He knows what he did.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Sass FIGHT! part deux, Payback's a Bitch.
Sass FIGHT! part deux, Payback's a Bitch.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
that was excellent return-sass. we are now brethren.
that was excellent return-sass. we are now brethren.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
physics are other than heartwarming and/or sexy to me.
physics are other than heartwarming and/or sexy to me.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Ah, but that's why there's chemistry! ;)
Ah, but that's why there's chemistry! ;)
supahlovah
+0 -0
So, is the cat dead or alive?
So, is the cat dead or alive?
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
Someone needs to re-write The Cat in the Schroedinger's Hat, lushly illustrated by Hamscout, so our kids don't fall further behind.
[IMGS OFF]
Someone needs to re-write The Cat in the Schroedinger's Hat, lushly illustrated by Hamscout, so our kids don't fall further behind.
[IMGS OFF]
paperboy_2000
+2 -0
It lacks Geisel's charm and Hamscout's art,
But this doggerel is a pretty good start:
Schroedinger's Cat Poem
It lacks Geisel's charm and Hamscout's art,
But this doggerel is a pretty good start:
Schroedinger's Cat Poem
bluemoon72
+0 -0
The cat is both dead and alive. greenkoolayd is in the process of breaking my heart, but I adore him anyway. Only the deterioration of the particle over time will allow us to lift the lid and determine our fate.
Incidentally, I was originally going to post "No shoe box could contain our forbidden love!" but the Schroedinger's box comment seemed both more clever and relevant.
Ah, life.
The cat is both dead and alive. greenkoolayd is in the process of breaking my heart, but I adore him anyway. Only the deterioration of the particle over time will allow us to lift the lid and determine our fate.
Incidentally, I was originally going to post "No shoe box could contain our forbidden love!" but the Schroedinger's box comment seemed both more clever and relevant.
Ah, life.
firedmyass
+0 -0
Hey now, you're love is not forbidden... just off-putting.
Hey now, you're love is not forbidden... just off-putting.
firedmyass
+0 -0
oh goddammit... "you're?"
oh goddammit... "you're?"
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Yeah, that was off-putting in itself, but I was too polite to point it out.
Yeah, that was off-putting in itself, but I was too polite to point it out.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
The little cat's dead and alive,
And no one lifted a finger-
As Coroner- I do concur-
Bludgeoned by a postulate 'dinger.
(psst- dump him. It'll just lead to entropy and you know it)
The little cat's dead and alive,
And no one lifted a finger-
As Coroner- I do concur-
Bludgeoned by a postulate 'dinger.
(psst- dump him. It'll just lead to entropy and you know it)
bluemoon72
+0 -0
We're not together, so no dumping can or will occur. But props on the entropy joke!
We're not together, so no dumping can or will occur. But props on the entropy joke!
thegoblins
+0 -0
Everyone should dump who they're already with. And, like, go on antidepressants or something.
(That was a modernization of Hamlet's "Get thee to a nunnery" speech.)
Everyone should dump who they're already with. And, like, go on antidepressants or something.
(That was a modernization of Hamlet's "Get thee to a nunnery" speech.)
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
jokes on you. ive been taking an anti-depressant since i was 15.
jokes on you. ive been taking an anti-depressant since i was 15.
mr-siegal
+0 -0
Better than 50 years ago; 'Get thee a lobotomy.'
Better than 50 years ago; 'Get thee a lobotomy.'
mr-siegal
+0 -0
Ophelia was, of course, a dumpee.
Ophelia was, of course, a dumpee.
mr-siegal
+0 -0
She did her little bit for entropy though.
She did her little bit for entropy though.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
what about his tuffit
what about his tuffit
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
yeah, i know. thanks. ":|"
yeah, i know. thanks. ":|"
paperboy_2000
+0 -0
Are you implying that the area's most sensitive man has 25% off in the man's most sensitive area?
Are you implying that the area's most sensitive man has 25% off in the man's most sensitive area?
daidai
+1 -0
Next strip, Todd will get the call which informs him that Blister is, in fact, a banana factory
Next strip, Todd will get the call which informs him that Blister is, in fact, a banana factory
octafish
+4 -0
Come mister tally man
Tally me Banana
Daylight come and me wanna go home
Come mister tally man
Tally me Banana
Daylight come and me wanna go home
spectre
+0 -0
This has all the seeds of disaster. And they have sprouted.
This has all the seeds of disaster. And they have sprouted.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
this is how Maylene began her legacy.
this is how Maylene began her legacy.
theirateturk
+1 -0
Todd is the squirrel.
Todd is the squirrel.
cromar
+1 -0
TODD
TODD
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Achewood is a celebration of the english language.
Achewood is a celebration of the english language.
muh
+0 -0
hell f-f-f-f-rickin' yeah it is!
hell f-f-f-f-rickin' yeah it is!
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Que?
Que?
greenkoolayd
+2 -0
ju wan' some mocha chica?
ju wan' some mocha chica?
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Si, esse! It is my favorite.
Si, esse! It is my favorite.
mystkmanat
+0 -0
Maybe ju an me are amigos?
Maybe ju an me are amigos?
supahlovah
+2 -0
I just wanted to say that manatees are the best mammal ever. When I was in 2nd grade I made a shoebox diorama about them. I'm ordering a giant stuffed manatee, that's how much I love them.
<3 I think I found my favorite user!
I just wanted to say that manatees are the best mammal ever. When I was in 2nd grade I made a shoebox diorama about them. I'm ordering a giant stuffed manatee, that's how much I love them.
<3 I think I found my favorite user!
supahlovah
+0 -0
Shit, also that's going to get ignored or lamed. :(
Shit, also that's going to get ignored or lamed. :(
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Shit no. Chubbied for manatee/dugong love. (I actually tend to lean more towards dugongs, slightly.)
Shit no. Chubbied for manatee/dugong love. (I actually tend to lean more towards dugongs, slightly.)
paperboy_2000
+1 -0
[url=Manatee Comics]https://herman.manateepower.com/2008/02/27/bubble-trouble-2/[/url]
[url=Manatee Comics]https://herman.manateepower.com/2008/02/27/bubble-trouble-2/[/url]
supahlovah
+0 -0
...ereht sdrawkcab tib a
...ereht sdrawkcab tib a
doctorbaronking
+1 -0
That is the exact level of quality one expects from a quark user. Conny is like my Grandma discovering that there are different fonts.
That is the exact level of quality one expects from a quark user. Conny is like my Grandma discovering that there are different fonts.
rayonatoilet
+0 -0
I keep thinking that Cornelius' work is holding somebody for ransom.
I keep thinking that Cornelius' work is holding somebody for ransom.
wingspan
+28 -0
Social Escort - "Hell yeah we gotta go out somewhere! The fuck you think I got someplace to take 'em?"
Dining Companion - "Th-They better fuckin' feed me too."
Bad Day at Work? I'm a Listener! - "Naw, I ain't care if they cry while we're doin' it."
Social Escort - "Hell yeah we gotta go out somewhere! The fuck you think I got someplace to take 'em?"
Dining Companion - "Th-They better fuckin' feed me too."
Bad Day at Work? I'm a Listener! - "Naw, I ain't care if they cry while we're doin' it."
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
yea and verily
yea and verily
invidious
+0 -0
As someone has said before, there's no way this isn't true.
As someone has said before, there's no way this isn't true.
supahlovah
+0 -0
I've just spent the last month or so on and off reading through the whole of achewood at work.
I feel bad having to go back through now that I have the ability to set the lame threshold above 3.
Thanks, achewood and assetbar community, for keeping me busy!
I've just spent the last month or so on and off reading through the whole of achewood at work.
I feel bad having to go back through now that I have the ability to set the lame threshold above 3.
Thanks, achewood and assetbar community, for keeping me busy!
granularsilica
+0 -0
No wonder productivity is down.
No wonder productivity is down.
muh
+0 -0
i dunno if anyone cares. but in the last strip, I told thegoblins that she shouldn't drink because she's insane, alcohol that is I said she shouldn't drink booze. and then she told me to go fuck myself, and she also said another one of my posts was lame, she said it in a vindictive way. and it was a post of a cute dog. she besmirched a cute dog to dig at me. I feel very uncomfortable now. I feel exposed and naked.
i dunno if anyone cares. but in the last strip, I told thegoblins that she shouldn't drink because she's insane, alcohol that is I said she shouldn't drink booze. and then she told me to go fuck myself, and she also said another one of my posts was lame, she said it in a vindictive way. and it was a post of a cute dog. she besmirched a cute dog to dig at me. I feel very uncomfortable now. I feel exposed and naked.
streever
+0 -0
I feel like you are trying too hard and are doomed to failure.
I feel like you are trying too hard and are doomed to failure.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Exposed and naked, good name for a band.
Exposed and naked, good name for a band.
aperson
+0 -0
[going-through-the-motions]hey avatar comment synergy[/going-through-the-motions]
[going-through-the-motions]hey avatar comment synergy[/going-through-the-motions]
supahlovah
+0 -0
Two words. Liquid Banjo.
Two words. Liquid Banjo.
comrade_tom
+1 -0
Two words.
MAN UP.
Two words.
MAN UP.
muh
+0 -1
but I'm already up
but I'm already up
comrade_tom
+1 -0
I hate to confer legitimacy on this most vulgar of codices.
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=man up
I hate to confer legitimacy on this most vulgar of codices.
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=man up
muh
+0 -0
wow... no one has posted in 3 hours. what a busy monday.
wow... no one has posted in 3 hours. what a busy monday.
neonfreon
+0 -0
it's because assetbar isn't being linked from the main achewood page right now.
why do you think it's delinked?
maybe onstad and the israel lheureux fellow had a falling out?
it's because assetbar isn't being linked from the main achewood page right now.
why do you think it's delinked?
maybe onstad and the israel lheureux fellow had a falling out?
neonfreon
+0 -0
Here is his linkedin profile if you're interested in harassing him on onstad's behalf
htt://www.linkedin.com/in/googlebot
Here is his linkedin profile if you're interested in harassing him on onstad's behalf
htt://www.linkedin.com/in/googlebot
neonfreon
+0 -0
https://www.linkedin.com/in/googlebot
I'd appreciate it if you really did harass this guy
https://www.linkedin.com/in/googlebot
I'd appreciate it if you really did harass this guy
emosexy
+0 -0
I'm confused...why are we harassing the guy? I was not informed of this (but once I understand, I may partake in this tomfoolery).
I'm confused...why are we harassing the guy? I was not informed of this (but once I understand, I may partake in this tomfoolery).
muh
+2 -0
huh? what? It is so being linked.
I don't wanna go harass some guy somewhere out there on the internet because that would take work. it's much easier to harass people on assetbar. and to watch south park
huh? what? It is so being linked.
I don't wanna go harass some guy somewhere out there on the internet because that would take work. it's much easier to harass people on assetbar. and to watch south park
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
love south park. actually, gonna fire up the netflix right now! ahhhhhhhhhhh, small town dealings, tuck me in and be my breakfast.
love south park. actually, gonna fire up the netflix right now! ahhhhhhhhhhh, small town dealings, tuck me in and be my breakfast.
neonfreon
+1 -0
no it aint being linked look at the source code man
Quote:
<p id="comic_body">
<a href=""><img src="/comic.php?date=09282009" title="It is intentional that I have no idea how Banana Factory serves as a slur. "
class="comic" alt="Comic for September 28, 2009" /></a><br/>
</p>
dog that is a str8 link to ""
no it aint being linked look at the source code man
Quote:
<p id="comic_body">
<a href=""><img src="/comic.php?date=09282009" title="It is intentional that I have no idea how Banana Factory serves as a slur. "
class="comic" alt="Comic for September 28, 2009" /></a><br/>
</p>
dog that is a str8 link to ""
muh
+0 -0
weird. yeah none of the other strips are linked to assetbar either. the previous strips are just linked to theyselves.
I thought you was refurrin to the "discuss" link in the upper right corner a the screen. it is still linkin to assetbar.
Achewood
* Shop
* Archive
* News
* Contact
* About
* Gallery
* Random comic
* Discuss
hey check out this funny video made me laugh my ass off it's like a comic strip only it's animated.
weird. yeah none of the other strips are linked to assetbar either. the previous strips are just linked to theyselves.
I thought you was refurrin to the "discuss" link in the upper right corner a the screen. it is still linkin to assetbar.
Achewood
* Shop
* Archive
* News
* Contact
* About
* Gallery
* Random comic
* Discuss
hey check out this funny video made me laugh my ass off it's like a comic strip only it's animated.
neonfreon
+0 -0
yeah i forgot about the discuss link and i guess most people can't find it and are really frustrated
why do you think onstad busted it up?
i can't watch that comic because it's gross and people would have questions about issues but i appreciate the thought
you know it reminds me of some of that salad finger's guy's comics - perhaps you've heard of him, he's british but you can get over that i think
yeah i forgot about the discuss link and i guess most people can't find it and are really frustrated
why do you think onstad busted it up?
i can't watch that comic because it's gross and people would have questions about issues but i appreciate the thought
you know it reminds me of some of that salad finger's guy's comics - perhaps you've heard of him, he's british but you can get over that i think
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
well, y'know how some of the comics in the past had links that went to different places when you clicked on them? maybe he's reviving that, making sure you can still do that.
well, y'know how some of the comics in the past had links that went to different places when you clicked on them? maybe he's reviving that, making sure you can still do that.
streever
+0 -0
maybe stuff is just broke. happens!
maybe stuff is just broke. happens!
neonfreon
+0 -0
he's the guy that makes assetbar
he's the guy that makes assetbar
muh
+0 -0
i would feel bad harassing him. he might even be retarded.
i would feel bad harassing him. he might even be retarded.
streever
+0 -0
You jumped the crazy train with this one.
You jumped the crazy train with this one.
neonfreon
+0 -0
jumped the tracks?
jumped the tracks?
puguglypress
+1 -0
Man, sometimes Achewood fans are just like Pavlov's dogs. Ring the Todd bell and they salivate Fives, even if the strip in question is terrible.
Man, sometimes Achewood fans are just like Pavlov's dogs. Ring the Todd bell and they salivate Fives, even if the strip in question is terrible.
hatstand_mcq
+1 -0
Todd would like to endorse the ringing of the Todd bell. Particularly by bitches who've taken their cunt-pills.
Todd would like to endorse the ringing of the Todd bell. Particularly by bitches who've taken their cunt-pills.
wingspan
+0 -0
I'm fairly certain that back when we could see the ratings every single Onstad-produced strip had an average above 4.0, and many of the guest strips did too. People are overzealous with the fives no matter who's in the strip.
I'm fairly certain that back when we could see the ratings every single Onstad-produced strip had an average above 4.0, and many of the guest strips did too. People are overzealous with the fives no matter who's in the strip.
muh
+0 -0
that happens with any rating system like that I think
https://www.techcrunch.com/2009/09/22/youtube-comes-to-a-5-star-realization-its-ratings-are-useless/
that happens with any rating system like that I think
https://www.techcrunch.com/2009/09/22/youtube-comes-to-a-5-star-realization-its-ratings-are-useless/
johnmatrix
+0 -0
Using the dumbest place on the internet as a basis doesn't make for a very convincing study.
Using the dumbest place on the internet as a basis doesn't make for a very convincing study.
wazza
+0 -0
My contact with YouTube has mostly been in the university lecture hall. Don't be hating on the site because some of the patrons don't know how to make their neurons fire without matches.
My contact with YouTube has mostly been in the university lecture hall. Don't be hating on the site because some of the patrons don't know how to make their neurons fire without matches.
johnmatrix
+0 -0
It doesn't matter whether there are useful videos or not, it's still the most idiotic place on the internet. Yes, I mean that seriously. As stupid as other sites can be, I've never seen one that tops Youtube.
It doesn't matter whether there are useful videos or not, it's still the most idiotic place on the internet. Yes, I mean that seriously. As stupid as other sites can be, I've never seen one that tops Youtube.
muh
+0 -0
huh, I never read the comments, so I guess I never noticed.
huh, I never read the comments, so I guess I never noticed.
supahlovah
+0 -0
Have you ever seen /b/?
Have you ever seen /b/?
wazza
+0 -0
Let me put it this way. Erfworld includes this thing where internet memes and such are converted into features of the magical and combat systems. When a poop golem blows up, the resulting mushroom cloud is labelled "4chan", not "YouTube".
Let me put it this way. Erfworld includes this thing where internet memes and such are converted into features of the magical and combat systems. When a poop golem blows up, the resulting mushroom cloud is labelled "4chan", not "YouTube".
johnmatrix
+0 -0
Internet Memes are one of the lowest forms of comedy, but it's 4chan who tends to make them, not Youtube. There's more to stupidity than memes.
Internet Memes are one of the lowest forms of comedy, but it's 4chan who tends to make them, not Youtube. There's more to stupidity than memes.
supahlovah
+0 -0
Have you ever tried to do anything intelligent on /b/?
Have you ever tried to do anything intelligent on /b/?
johnmatrix
+0 -0
Have you ever bothered reading through the comments of an average video, or are you just talking out of your ass? I've seen someone praise a video of a song by saying "This song is so cool...because it has music and you can hear people singing in it!" That is honest to god what he said. Youtube isn't just stupid, many comments are just mind numbingly innane.
Have you ever bothered reading through the comments of an average video, or are you just talking out of your ass? I've seen someone praise a video of a song by saying "This song is so cool...because it has music and you can hear people singing in it!" That is honest to god what he said. Youtube isn't just stupid, many comments are just mind numbingly innane.
cracklewater
+0 -0
I'd have to agree. While there are sites that are nastier, sicker and more mean-spirited, in my experience youtube represents the internet's single greatest concentration of stupid people making pointless comments. Or is it pointless people making stupid comments? I forget.
I'd have to agree. While there are sites that are nastier, sicker and more mean-spirited, in my experience youtube represents the internet's single greatest concentration of stupid people making pointless comments. Or is it pointless people making stupid comments? I forget.
wazza
+0 -0
What about Conservapedia?
What about Conservapedia?
cracklewater
+0 -0
Good contender, but a different kind of stupid, IMHO.
Conservapedia seems more like studied, deliberate, determined ignorance. With a fair old dash of evil.
Youtube represents more of a gibbering, halfwit-farmhand kind of stupid.
Good contender, but a different kind of stupid, IMHO.
Conservapedia seems more like studied, deliberate, determined ignorance. With a fair old dash of evil.
Youtube represents more of a gibbering, halfwit-farmhand kind of stupid.
streever
+0 -0
Way to call it like you see it. I like your spunk. Chubbied.
Way to call it like you see it. I like your spunk. Chubbied.
firedmyass
+0 -0
Your pinchbeck contrarianism has aroused me. Let's wrestle.
Your pinchbeck contrarianism has aroused me. Let's wrestle.
ishuta
+0 -0
todd has a special bell that you ring when you want to see him, and also a special bell that you ring when you've seen too much of him and would like more teodor
todd has a special bell that you ring when you want to see him, and also a special bell that you ring when you've seen too much of him and would like more teodor
ishuta
+1 -0
wanting to see teodor can mean only one thing
i'm sorry, sir, but you have less than a year to live.
wanting to see teodor can mean only one thing
i'm sorry, sir, but you have less than a year to live.
troy_convers
+0 -0
This is the first arc in ages that doesn't appear to revolve around the 'Cat Mafia'.
So far.
This is the first arc in ages that doesn't appear to revolve around the 'Cat Mafia'.
So far.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Todd is illiterate, but capable of using a corded telephone.
Todd is illiterate, but capable of using a corded telephone.
autrepoupee
+1 -0
Please do not write to Sensitive Todd . Sensitive Todd is illiterate, and reminding him of this fact will set off a reaction not unlike Insensitive, Illiterate Kenny 's from the popular television program Oz.
Please do not write to Sensitive Todd . Sensitive Todd is illiterate, and reminding him of this fact will set off a reaction not unlike Insensitive, Illiterate Kenny 's from the popular television program Oz.
sizone
+0 -0
Strip clubs in Hawaii -always- charge a cover and have a two drink minimum.
Strip clubs in Hawaii -always- charge a cover and have a two drink minimum.
troy_convers
+0 -0
'No church-face retards. An' I ain't wearing no gunny sack!'
'No church-face retards. An' I ain't wearing no gunny sack!'
rowboat
+1 -0
Church-face retards are diametrically opposed to the use of gunny sacks.
Church-face retards are diametrically opposed to the use of gunny sacks.
troy_convers
+0 -0
Bet they don't take their cunt pills either.
Bet they don't take their cunt pills either.
gyrate
+0 -0
Tood himself is ribbed "for her pleasure".
Tood himself is ribbed "for her pleasure".
gyrate
+0 -0
Unlike my BBCode
Unlike my BBCode
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Your BBCode is ribbed fiercely.
Rib Rib Rib Rib
Your BBCode is ribbed fiercely.
Rib Rib Rib Rib
nbeer
+1 -0
Speaking of church-face, my father-in-law is capable of an expression my husband refers to as "Deacon Eye." It has the power to turn beer flat and nipples flaccid.
Speaking of church-face, my father-in-law is capable of an expression my husband refers to as "Deacon Eye." It has the power to turn beer flat and nipples flaccid.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
...damn.
...damn.
re5urgam
+0 -0
S ERVICES:
S ERVICES:
plummet
+0 -0
Todd is the real main character of Ache Wood
solid 5 by the way
Todd is the real main character of Ache Wood
solid 5 by the way
octafish
+1 -0
No.
No.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
yes, no.
yes, no.
neonfreon
+0 -0
out of deep respect for todd, next time a shoot a squirrel i'll consider eating it, if i haven't put out poison recently
out of deep respect for todd, next time a shoot a squirrel i'll consider eating it, if i haven't put out poison recently
lucid
+1 -0
That's no way to respect Todd. You should be putting a little helmet on the squirrel and batting it over a fence.
That's no way to respect Todd. You should be putting a little helmet on the squirrel and batting it over a fence.
supahlovah
+0 -0
Squirrel Slingshots?
Squirrel Slingshots?
wazza
+0 -0
you gotta film it.
VHS PREFERRED!
you gotta film it.
VHS PREFERRED!
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
i am eatin' only 1 tine a day an sleepin' like 12 hours but getin' alot of hydration. skins gettin' smoother i am drink somewhere round 4-5k ml easy per day nowadays i am not sick. i duno. i guess i m tells u dis cuz i really wanna some KFC grilled chikcen real bad it looks so damn good
i am eatin' only 1 tine a day an sleepin' like 12 hours but getin' alot of hydration. skins gettin' smoother i am drink somewhere round 4-5k ml easy per day nowadays i am not sick. i duno. i guess i m tells u dis cuz i really wanna some KFC grilled chikcen real bad it looks so damn good
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
granularsilica
+0 -0
The KFC cure, my fave.
The KFC cure, my fave.
wazza
+0 -0
five thousand millilitres?
you realise you can just say litres, right? we don't need no frontin' from you, Glad...
five thousand millilitres?
you realise you can just say litres, right? we don't need no frontin' from you, Glad...
expellens
+0 -0
On this side of the pond, we say mililiters because we ain't learned the metric system so good. We think of a liter as a retarded quart if we think of it at all. And don't get me started on centiliters... That's all wing wong ching chong to us.
On this side of the pond, we say mililiters because we ain't learned the metric system so good. We think of a liter as a retarded quart if we think of it at all. And don't get me started on centiliters... That's all wing wong ching chong to us.
wazza
+0 -0
centilitres is something only encountered here in foreign liquors, if at all. We just use the three-orders-of-magnitude units, except for centimetres, which are often used in school because they're kind of a convenient size for basic geometry practise.
centilitres is something only encountered here in foreign liquors, if at all. We just use the three-orders-of-magnitude units, except for centimetres, which are often used in school because they're kind of a convenient size for basic geometry practise.
dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately
+1 -0
you got swine flu? i had it last week, rough time :( :(
you got swine flu? i had it last week, rough time :( :(
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
my roommate says someone he works with has it.
my roommate says someone he works with has it.
granularsilica
+0 -0
We're all goona die!!
We're all goona die!!
expellens
+0 -0
God is innnn his holy temmmmple...
God is innnn his holy temmmmple...
bluemoon72
+0 -0
My coworker (next-door cubicle neighbor) went home sick yesterday morning, and was diagnosed with it. I'm not too worried, I have a good immune system. But I travel again next week, a fall leaf trip to New England, and I really hope I'm not sledgehammered by flu while traveling.
My coworker (next-door cubicle neighbor) went home sick yesterday morning, and was diagnosed with it. I'm not too worried, I have a good immune system. But I travel again next week, a fall leaf trip to New England, and I really hope I'm not sledgehammered by flu while traveling.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
leaves..? in New England? huh. i only thought the Rocky Mountains had things like that.
leaves..? in New England? huh. i only thought the Rocky Mountains had things like that.
octafish
+0 -0
Wait... There's a new England?
Wait... There's a new England?
wazza
+0 -0
OBVIOUSLY THE OLD ONE WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH
OBVIOUSLY THE OLD ONE WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
f-f-f-frick, the way Todd denies gayness made me imagine him hopping on the P&R railroad to Dreamtown.
it is not something i will imagine ever again.
f-f-f-frick, the way Todd denies gayness made me imagine him hopping on the P&R railroad to Dreamtown.
it is not something i will imagine ever again.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Suckin' Dick Bought That Boarding Pass
Suckin' Dick Bought That Boarding Pass
promnight
+0 -0
Cornelius aint the kinda dude would be using one a them trendy stemless wineglasses, and though its obvious he'd enjoy a fine sherry, or more likely madeira, of an afternoon, he would use a glass of the right shape. Did Todd steal his drink, also?
Cornelius aint the kinda dude would be using one a them trendy stemless wineglasses, and though its obvious he'd enjoy a fine sherry, or more likely madeira, of an afternoon, he would use a glass of the right shape. Did Todd steal his drink, also?
supahlovah
+0 -0
It's not a stemless glass. We're clearly looking from slightly under the edge of the table, as the monitor is cut off in a straight line.
Also, Todd appears to just hit the glass. "THEN" at the top of the next frame makes me think Cornelius moved the glass.
It's not a stemless glass. We're clearly looking from slightly under the edge of the table, as the monitor is cut off in a straight line.
Also, Todd appears to just hit the glass. "THEN" at the top of the next frame makes me think Cornelius moved the glass.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
A balloon glass of Fernet or Green Chartreuse (I'm imagining this taking place after dinner)? I imagine Cornelius has the sort of complicated old fashioned digestion that has to be assisted by various herbs and liquors.
A balloon glass of Fernet or Green Chartreuse (I'm imagining this taking place after dinner)? I imagine Cornelius has the sort of complicated old fashioned digestion that has to be assisted by various herbs and liquors.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
So at what point was it decided that every strip exists solely as a flimsy pretext for churning out yet another piece of graphic design in the last panel?
So at what point was it decided that every strip exists solely as a flimsy pretext for churning out yet another piece of graphic design in the last panel?
muh
+0 -0
on some level shouldn't we appreciate the parody of graphic design?
on some level shouldn't we appreciate the parody of graphic design?
firedmyass
+0 -0
we all voted last week while you at a dick meeting.
we all voted last week while you at a dick meeting.
expellens
+0 -0
is anybody out there rockin' a Todd Squirrel tattoo? I figure it'd be like the old WWII vets with the black panthers on their forearms - by the time you're in your 70s, it's just gonna be a big ugly smear of india ink. f-f-frick!
is anybody out there rockin' a Todd Squirrel tattoo? I figure it'd be like the old WWII vets with the black panthers on their forearms - by the time you're in your 70s, it's just gonna be a big ugly smear of india ink. f-f-frick!
granularsilica
+0 -0
It would look too much like an enlarged mole.
It would look too much like an enlarged mole.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
A melanoma of unusual size.
A melanoma of unusual size.
neonfreon
+1 -0
if onstad decided to cancel assetbar for his site, who would mainly be to blame?
if onstad decided to cancel assetbar for his site, who would mainly be to blame?
wazza
+0 -0
the commie liberal nazi Obama regime!
the commie liberal nazi Obama regime!
aperson
+0 -0
...but... wasn't assetbar set up during the Bushitler imperium?
Blame where blame is due I say.
...but... wasn't assetbar set up during the Bushitler imperium?
Blame where blame is due I say.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Roast Beef. He proved himself a coward who would desert a dying webcomic.
Roast Beef. He proved himself a coward who would desert a dying webcomic.
brokeaccount
+0 -0
I'm pretty much of the opinion that the assetbar community is the problem with Achewood. The decline in quality of the strip seems to be linked to the moment in time when Chris started receiving regular feedback and - worst of all - musings on plot developments live in a public forum.
I'm pretty much of the opinion that the assetbar community is the problem with Achewood. The decline in quality of the strip seems to be linked to the moment in time when Chris started receiving regular feedback and - worst of all - musings on plot developments live in a public forum.
firedmyass
+3 -0
aside from the floppy presumptuousness of your assessment, correlation ain't causation.
aside from the floppy presumptuousness of your assessment, correlation ain't causation.
brokeaccount
+0 -0
Note the word "opinion" right there at the beginning. But that aside, I'd say it's undeniable that if he does read this while he's writing a strip or an arc it will have SOME impact on what he then creates. Kind of like the Hawthorne effect.
And all this isn't to say I don't like assetbar, I think it's pretty fun. I wouldn't be posting here if I hated it.
Note the word "opinion" right there at the beginning. But that aside, I'd say it's undeniable that if he does read this while he's writing a strip or an arc it will have SOME impact on what he then creates. Kind of like the Hawthorne effect.
And all this isn't to say I don't like assetbar, I think it's pretty fun. I wouldn't be posting here if I hated it.
johnmatrix
+0 -0
Given that Onstad tends to ignore assestbar more than listens to it, and that the complaints come AFTER he's done something people find of lower quality than the rest of the site, I find your theory baseless.
Given that Onstad tends to ignore assestbar more than listens to it, and that the complaints come AFTER he's done something people find of lower quality than the rest of the site, I find your theory baseless.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Moar Physics!
[IMGS OFF]
Moar Physics!
[IMGS OFF]
neonfreon
+0 -0
lol i was claiming that would happen as soon as assetbar started
i dont really feel that way anymore though, i really kind of like assetbar now
there are enough lulzy people that even if onstad has an off day there is some great material here
i dont really care about onstad being influenced now, as long as he keeps posting something of anything, assetbarians will continue generating good times
lol i was claiming that would happen as soon as assetbar started
i dont really feel that way anymore though, i really kind of like assetbar now
there are enough lulzy people that even if onstad has an off day there is some great material here
i dont really care about onstad being influenced now, as long as he keeps posting something of anything, assetbarians will continue generating good times
neonfreon
+0 -0
prophetic
prophetic
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
dear sje,
i miss you. i made you a 'smoother' avatar. well, one that isn't so just 'blocks'. i do not know if this is how you meant it, though. get back to me and we can work out specifics.
[IMGS OFF]
dear sje,
i miss you. i made you a 'smoother' avatar. well, one that isn't so just 'blocks'. i do not know if this is how you meant it, though. get back to me and we can work out specifics.
[IMGS OFF]
supahlovah
+0 -0
CHUBBY!
CHUBBY!
otter
+0 -0
I can think of lots of times that I've been asked for money, but not one that I've been asked for ham, or for nothing. I'm not really sure how I'd respond to that last one.
I can think of lots of times that I've been asked for money, but not one that I've been asked for ham, or for nothing. I'm not really sure how I'd respond to that last one.
ishuta
+0 -0
hey FUCKER
do you have any cheese? maybe some bread? i would like both together if possible.
hey FUCKER
do you have any cheese? maybe some bread? i would like both together if possible.
wazza
+0 -0
you can get that free from Carrboro's
you can get that free from Carrboro's
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
Excuse me assist bar but can u helps me? i am fixin' 2 do and search for defunct mercenary groups n and effort 2 locate infos on one in-particular that did jobs in africa (kenya?) but i cannit remember teh name of teh group. i keep finkin was somethin like black paw or some shit. dis woulda been in l8 80s 90s i m not sure. anyways i am conduct my own search but ib u get an infos i would gr8ly appreciate it thx
Excuse me assist bar but can u helps me? i am fixin' 2 do and search for defunct mercenary groups n and effort 2 locate infos on one in-particular that did jobs in africa (kenya?) but i cannit remember teh name of teh group. i keep finkin was somethin like black paw or some shit. dis woulda been in l8 80s 90s i m not sure. anyways i am conduct my own search but ib u get an infos i would gr8ly appreciate it thx
muh
+0 -0
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercenary#20th_century
if this isn't what you're looking for, it at least gives you keyword fodder for google
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercenary#20th_century
if this isn't what you're looking for, it at least gives you keyword fodder for google
comrade_tom
+0 -0
soldier of fortune magazine perhaps?
soldier of fortune magazine perhaps?
octafish
+0 -0
Only one that springs to mind is Sandline.
Only one that springs to mind is Sandline.
mr-siegal
+0 -0
The only one I know of to operate in Kenya is Aegis, but this was in the past few years not 1990s.
The only one I know of to operate in Kenya is Aegis, but this was in the past few years not 1990s.
ishuta
+0 -0
basically todd looks at a homosexual with such a look of harried anger the homosexual is stunned and shamed
basically todd looks at a homosexual with such a look of harried anger the homosexual is stunned and shamed
nice-on-water
+0 -0
No money? In a pinch, ham will do.
No money? In a pinch, ham will do.
hausea
+0 -0
Achewood presents us with a plethora of poorly planned business ventures.
Achewood presents us with a plethora of poorly planned business ventures.
kgeiger
+0 -0
Cornelius would say "Whom to call ..."
Cornelius would say "Whom to call ..."
I've never seen Todd so full of philosophies before!
Thank heavens for the return of Todd! In a very literal sense, presumably...
There are only a few more months for him to end up with his head on a spike, as foretold in Coming in 2009 .
We got to see the Story of Lyle, so there's a chance of squirrel-beheading too.
TODD'S BACK! *jumps up and down in jubilation*
(he is very happy for the return of the stuttering squirrel)
Also: You got any money or ham or nothin'?
I got nothin'. You're welcome to share it with me.
I also like to find out if there's gonna be ham in my immediate future. Sometimes I even call ahead.
I call it the porkcast
I'm bacon you to stop.
I sausage estions of puns so I came quick. Swine it?
I like this. :D
Ham is real... d'oh!
He who'd pun would pick a pocket.
I am the prophet of pancetta, I am the seer of sowbelly. I assure you there is ham in your immediate future.
AAnd Todd is still a shitty little bullshit man.
Knocks over Cornelius' glass of expensive sherry in his FIRST panel back
DUDE!
Tod is a CRAPPY little bullshit man!
'Shitty' is a whole other world of ... somethin'. Or ham. Or nothin'.
I'm more worried about Cüddlenacht, personally. Mostly because I fear the alternative.
(umlaut)
I'm quite looking forward to Cuddlenacht. The tension in Philippe's lower eyelids is terrifying.
Damn you assetbar, not even allowing a manual umlaut! Have you no pity?
I'm declined to pay for stuff to.
To pay for stuff to what? To finish your sentences? Don't leave us hanging, man!
But that's the best way to be hanging.
I've never seen Todd so close before. It freaks me out how much he looks like a beagle boy.
Todd is ready for his close-up, Mr. Demill.
"I am big! It's the F-f-f-faces of Death sequels that got small!"
Chubbied for making an account to get frist psot.