ghff
+0 -0
A comment left by ghff was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by featurelessvoid, expellens, apocowarg, Deusoma, scifigrl47, sirptom, chivalress, sardoniclaconic, Scorpio_nadir, milkpants, Sleaw, all-star951, TheGoodwillGirl, Lumus, Prine, flandango, cathaoir, LexSenthur, mrblank91, PresrvdKillick, cpnglxynchos, littlefatdog, w_t_f, smooveb, emosexy, theyang)
A comment left by ghff was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by featurelessvoid, expellens, apocowarg, Deusoma, scifigrl47, sirptom, chivalress, sardoniclaconic, Scorpio_nadir, milkpants, Sleaw, all-star951, TheGoodwillGirl, Lumus, Prine, flandango, cathaoir, LexSenthur, mrblank91, PresrvdKillick, cpnglxynchos, littlefatdog, w_t_f, smooveb, emosexy, theyang)
gormster
+1 -0
I don't think I can lame this enough. There is trolling and then there is this.
Correction: I can't lame this enough because I can't lame anything. I haven't been able to lame anything for three years. What's going on, Assetbar.
I don't think I can lame this enough. There is trolling and then there is this.
Correction: I can't lame this enough because I can't lame anything. I haven't been able to lame anything for three years. What's going on, Assetbar.
davey-boy
+3 -0
Rate the strips, get lame rations.
Rate the strips, get lame rations.
drskradley
+0 -0
This is the Currency.
This is the Currency.
cracklewater
+0 -0
You are Rad for sharing this.
I had lost the ability to lame, as I pretty much stopped rating when the scores disappeared. I had no idea the two were connected.
Now I can lame again, but there is no new assetbar at the moment. Alas. I doubt I have the heart to lame anyone at such a sad time.
You are Rad for sharing this.
I had lost the ability to lame, as I pretty much stopped rating when the scores disappeared. I had no idea the two were connected.
Now I can lame again, but there is no new assetbar at the moment. Alas. I doubt I have the heart to lame anyone at such a sad time.
ghff
+0 -0
A comment left by ghff was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by apocowarg, Deusoma, nice-on-water, Lumus, Prine, Zoltan, mrblank91)
A comment left by ghff was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by apocowarg, Deusoma, nice-on-water, Lumus, Prine, Zoltan, mrblank91)
falseprophet
+3 -0
That video was not hilarious. It was depressing and wrong.
That video was not hilarious. It was depressing and wrong.
seanbad
+0 -0
It was on the verge of "hate-mongering gone hilariously, humiliatingly wrong" until they opened their mouths. I could feel my incus and mallus bones pressing against the inside of my head, threatening to burst free into the air in a desperate bid for respite from that wretched caterwauling.
It was on the verge of "hate-mongering gone hilariously, humiliatingly wrong" until they opened their mouths. I could feel my incus and mallus bones pressing against the inside of my head, threatening to burst free into the air in a desperate bid for respite from that wretched caterwauling.
nice-on-water
+9 -0
God hates cunts that play "Beat It" with the "Thriller" dance.
God hates cunts that play "Beat It" with the "Thriller" dance.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
hate it
hate it
farqussus
+0 -0
God be a useless cunt
God be a useless cunt
nice-on-water
+0 -0
WHOAAAA
WHOAAAA
octafish
+0 -0
He'll beat you brainless.
He'll beat you brainless.
octafish
+0 -0
He'll beat you brainless.
He'll beat you brainless.
octafish
+0 -0
Oh no, how could this happen to me ?
Oh no, how could this happen to me ?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
It always happens to Someone Else.
It always happens to Someone Else.
wazza
+0 -0
the... the unlucky ones
the... the unlucky ones
deusoma
+0 -0
Apparently I don't have spam marking privileges.
Apparently I don't have spam marking privileges.
ghff
+0 -0
A comment left by ghff was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by jettisoned, expellens, apocowarg, nohassles, invidious, Deusoma, srikamaraja, sardoniclaconic, Cracklewater, Lumus, Prine, Troy_Convers, gmontag, mrblank91, littlefatdog)
A comment left by ghff was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by jettisoned, expellens, apocowarg, nohassles, invidious, Deusoma, srikamaraja, sardoniclaconic, Cracklewater, Lumus, Prine, Troy_Convers, gmontag, mrblank91, littlefatdog)
icecube
+54 -1
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
prine
+0 -0
Pretty much fucking perfect.
Pretty much fucking perfect.
lexsenthur
+1 -0
Please create me a program that will take a block of text and fill it in thusly. Immediately.
Please create me a program that will take a block of text and fill it in thusly. Immediately.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Ahh dang. At first glance, I thought you were adding to Comrade_Tom's post, the thread above with
The Great Wall of Gina.
Ahh dang. At first glance, I thought you were adding to Comrade_Tom's post, the thread above with
The Great Wall of Gina.
comrade_tom
+1 -0
I imagine ghff's post been read out in a sound akin to the monotonous thud of a steam hammer; relentlessly beating sheet metal, indifferent to its lonliness and the fact that the hands that set in motion have long since turned away.
But thats just me.
I imagine ghff's post been read out in a sound akin to the monotonous thud of a steam hammer; relentlessly beating sheet metal, indifferent to its lonliness and the fact that the hands that set in motion have long since turned away.
But thats just me.
farqussus
+0 -0
i will thank you not to compare that post to Coil
i will thank you not to compare that post to Coil
jettisoned
+2 -0
it'd be not spam if it was a video naming euphemisms for the female genitalia or anyone was talking about hate speech.
but we're not, so :(
it'd be not spam if it was a video naming euphemisms for the female genitalia or anyone was talking about hate speech.
but we're not, so :(
halfdirt
+0 -1
off-topic doesn't imply spam. spam implies repetition or unsolicited commercial message, in my mind at least. I love hating things like the Westboro Baptist Church, myself - they border on self-parody. This site though.. too full of people caring about how others perceive them.
off-topic doesn't imply spam. spam implies repetition or unsolicited commercial message, in my mind at least. I love hating things like the Westboro Baptist Church, myself - they border on self-parody. This site though.. too full of people caring about how others perceive them.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Quote:
A typical Saturday night in my town.
Quote:
fucktards rubbing each other's nuts and clits and slinging feces at each other
A typical Saturday night in my town.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
get over yourself, pussy!
get over yourself, pussy!
deusoma
+0 -0
Actually it just seemed to me that you were an asshole and that I didn't want to hear from you ever agin. Funny how you kind of proved my point.
Actually it just seemed to me that you were an asshole and that I didn't want to hear from you ever agin. Funny how you kind of proved my point.
jonno
+0 -0
Is it weird that I'd have hesistated less if it was a .exe than a .wmv?
Is it weird that I'd have hesistated less if it was a .exe than a .wmv?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
no. i'da saved it and given it a once-over, too.
no. i'da saved it and given it a once-over, too.
puguglypress
+0 -0
I'm surprised at how much Cornelius seems into this job.
I'm surprised at how much Cornelius seems into this job.
sweetlips
+1 -0
He's protecting his girl from seeing conditions. Could you not find motivation for such a task?
He's protecting his girl from seeing conditions. Could you not find motivation for such a task?
jonno
+2 -0
Like putting your jacket over a homeless man so your woman can walk over him.
Like putting your jacket over a homeless man so your woman can walk over him.
wozzeck
+1 -0
I have done this. My advice is: Fire your pistol into the vagabond before, not after.
I have done this. My advice is: Fire your pistol into the vagabond before, not after.
octafish
+0 -0
...it was like knocking four quick times on the door of unhappiness.
...it was like knocking four quick times on the door of unhappiness.
nicklon
+1 -0
that isn't wine
that isn't wine
lateadopter
+14 -0
Hey, special bonus! If you hover over nicklon's avicon, the nearly-underage French sexpot gets bigger and clearer!
Hey, special bonus! If you hover over nicklon's avicon, the nearly-underage French sexpot gets bigger and clearer!
smallblackdog
+0 -0
but is frozen in time - plus ca change.
but is frozen in time - plus ca change.
invidious
+1 -0
firefox plus greasemonkey plus assetbarista equals not frozen in time.
firefox plus greasemonkey plus assetbarista equals not frozen in time.
drskradley
+0 -0
Get the newest version of Firefox, fixes it. (for me, anyway)
Plus: don't know her name, but can't stop watching.
Get the newest version of Firefox, fixes it. (for me, anyway)
Plus: don't know her name, but can't stop watching.
jeffspaulding
+8 -1
Alizée Jacotey
[IMGS OFF]
Alizée Jacotey
[IMGS OFF]
jeffspaulding
+8 -0
Good Genes, Bad Jeans.
Good Genes, Bad Jeans.
i_love_kate
+2 -0
She looks like she's jumping back in shock after someone spilled a beaker of acid in her lap. The pleased expression I cannot account for.
She looks like she's jumping back in shock after someone spilled a beaker of acid in her lap. The pleased expression I cannot account for.
falseprophet
+2 -0
She's happy 'cause the acid killed her crabs.
She's happy 'cause the acid killed her crabs.
wazza
+0 -0
that basically implies that French girls cure their venereal diseases in dumb ways.
that basically implies that French girls cure their venereal diseases in dumb ways.
woodenteeth
+1 -0
No. It implies this French girl cures her venereal disease in dumb ways.
No. It implies this French girl cures her venereal disease in dumb ways.
wazza
+0 -0
yeah, but Beef only implied that one hispanic guy made friends for dumb reasons, so obviously these sorts of statements create an expectation of generalisation
yeah, but Beef only implied that one hispanic guy made friends for dumb reasons, so obviously these sorts of statements create an expectation of generalisation
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Disagreement Box.
Disagreement Box.
pmbarrett
+0 -0
what about the acid-proof panties?
what about the acid-proof panties?
bluemoon72
+0 -0
She learned that one the hard way.
She learned that one the hard way.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Jumping back in shock in such a way as to show off her tits...
Jumping back in shock in such a way as to show off her tits...
i_love_kate
+0 -0
All girls do this, all the time. Don't be frontin', now.
All girls do this, all the time. Don't be frontin', now.
scifigrl47
+0 -0
That may not make it onto Mr. Blackwell's Best Dressed list.
That may not make it onto Mr. Blackwell's Best Dressed list.
thegoblins
+0 -0
She dances still for me.
She dances still for me.
wazza
+0 -0
she dances always for thee
she dances always for thee
comrade_tom
+0 -0
She hasn't danced for me for fifteen years now.
Not since those heady days before the war.
She hasn't danced for me for fifteen years now.
Not since those heady days before the war.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I am not an asshole for doing this.
I am not an asshole for doing this.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
ALIZEE IS (twenty)FIVE.
ALIZEE IS (twenty)FIVE.
afterward
+0 -0
Did You Find This Comment Useful, Yes I Did.
Did You Find This Comment Useful, Yes I Did.
bluemoon72
+5 -0
Love the use of the Chill font. That's hardcore stupid.
Love the use of the Chill font. That's hardcore stupid.
ghff
+0 -0
Domain to Register: hellyes.com
Error: This domain is already registered.
Domain to Register: hellyes.com
Error: This domain is already registered.
ghff
+0 -0
god damn domain squatters must have had a keystroke sniffer running on the bear's computer.
god damn domain squatters must have had a keystroke sniffer running on the bear's computer.
gormster
+0 -0
In Australia we have laws against domain squatting. Why can we not expand this to the rest of the world? Yes, ours are a little extreme (you need to have a registered business name relevant to the domain) but we can do something about this, can't we?
In Australia we have laws against domain squatting. Why can we not expand this to the rest of the world? Yes, ours are a little extreme (you need to have a registered business name relevant to the domain) but we can do something about this, can't we?
somanywhales
+2 -0
In Australia you also have laws against visiting websites which hold controversial opinions , plus you agree to having all your web-browsing habits observed by a team of specialists.
In Australia you also have laws against visiting websites which hold controversial opinions , plus you agree to having all your web-browsing habits observed by a team of specialists.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
well, at least they admit it over there...
well, at least they admit it over there...
lucid
+0 -0
It's not a law, just another crazy dude who somehow snuck his way into a position where he can spend our money exploring the possibility of enacting such a law against all expert advice and public opinion.
Man, our system is fucked .
It's not a law, just another crazy dude who somehow snuck his way into a position where he can spend our money exploring the possibility of enacting such a law against all expert advice and public opinion.
Man, our system is fucked .
deus
+0 -0
FUCK THAT! why isnt the domain suffix .yes in EXSISTANCE!
we got ".no" though....oh we wacky norwegians.
FUCK THAT! why isnt the domain suffix .yes in EXSISTANCE!
we got ".no" though....oh we wacky norwegians.
wazza
+0 -0
we also have .in thanks to india
leading to the possibility of domains such as:
www.put.it.in
or
www.is.it.in
we also have .in thanks to india
leading to the possibility of domains such as:
www.put.it.in
or
www.is.it.in
hamscout
+1 -0
SOON
www.do.we.keep.the.baby.in
SOON
www.do.we.keep.the.baby.in
wazza
+0 -0
www.did.you.put.the.diaphragm.in
www.did.you.put.the.diaphragm.in
jonno
+0 -0
I've always felt "relatively high risk of pregnancy" porn was a gap in the market.
(Please prove me wrong. Statement has been made and I will now research it, which I believe is modern conventional scientific practice.)
I've always felt "relatively high risk of pregnancy" porn was a gap in the market.
(Please prove me wrong. Statement has been made and I will now research it, which I believe is modern conventional scientific practice.)
wazza
+0 -0
I believe a search of such terms as, perhaps, "BAREBACK SLUTS" or other similar terms will prove you wrong in short order.
I believe a search of such terms as, perhaps, "BAREBACK SLUTS" or other similar terms will prove you wrong in short order.
thegoblins
+0 -0
There's definitely a market for inappropriate spewings of the white and gooey.
There's definitely a market for inappropriate spewings of the white and gooey.
wazza
+0 -0
Like, just all over the altar in the middle of a service?
how inappropriate is too inappropriate?
Like, just all over the altar in the middle of a service?
how inappropriate is too inappropriate?
mikeleffel2
+2 -0
wait a minute the blacklight is where i look like a great catch
wait a minute the blacklight is where i look like a great catch
thegoblins
+1 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
falseprophet
+0 -0
thegoblins, what the hell is that? Is that a cumshot? Ain't nobody gonna ask you out when you got a dang cumshot.
thegoblins, what the hell is that? Is that a cumshot? Ain't nobody gonna ask you out when you got a dang cumshot.
thegoblins
+0 -0
It was supposed to be a ghostly white fish but it got cut off. Nobody asks me out anyway, so all is well.
It was supposed to be a ghostly white fish but it got cut off. Nobody asks me out anyway, so all is well.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Well, gee, thegoblins that is just wrong...
Would you... would you like to have my retarded baby?
Well, gee, thegoblins that is just wrong...
Would you... would you like to have my retarded baby?
thegoblins
+2 -0
Could...could it be a mewling pitiful anencephalic mess that dies within a few hours of being born?
Could...could it be a mewling pitiful anencephalic mess that dies within a few hours of being born?
falseprophet
+0 -0
I just got done reading A Personal Matter by Kenzaburo Oe! This relates to my interests!
I just got done reading A Personal Matter by Kenzaburo Oe! This relates to my interests!
wozzeck
+0 -0
Have you been to Hyderbad?
Have you been to Hyderbad?
thegoblins
+0 -0
Nope. I've been to pitifully few places.
Nope. I've been to pitifully few places.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
Poor, poor, pitiful you.
Poor, poor, pitiful you.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Have you been to Jaal ab Dullah to spend Ayatollah Dollar? Do you know the names durtro or dr. kinbote?
Are you that wozzeck?
Have you been to Jaal ab Dullah to spend Ayatollah Dollar? Do you know the names durtro or dr. kinbote?
Are you that wozzeck?
neonruin
+0 -0
So to quote from the Lynch: "We don't even know if it IS a baby yet."
So to quote from the Lynch: "We don't even know if it IS a baby yet."
wozzeck
+1 -0
It could be a prostitute!
It could be a prostitute!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
whatever. i totally asked you to marry me a strip or two ago and you totally ignored it.
we are sooooooo over.
whatever. i totally asked you to marry me a strip or two ago and you totally ignored it.
we are sooooooo over.
wazza
+0 -0
you should have just gone straight for the mutated offspring out of wedlock.
Girl can't commit.
you should have just gone straight for the mutated offspring out of wedlock.
Girl can't commit.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Lightning flies from cpn's fingertips
as tried to forget about thegoblins' nips
and the emotions that she sorely lacks.
"Fuck it," he thinks, "that girl is wack."
Lightning flies from cpn's fingertips
as tried to forget about thegoblins' nips
and the emotions that she sorely lacks.
"Fuck it," he thinks, "that girl is wack."
thegoblins
+2 -0
Uneasiness within him sits
as he contemplates her lovely clit.
She might not be ready to wed
But damnit does she give good head.
Uneasiness within him sits
as he contemplates her lovely clit.
She might not be ready to wed
But damnit does she give good head.
stereo
+0 -0
His couplets are weak
Like a bad cut of steak
But his bone looks like teak
As he drowns in her lake.
His couplets are weak
Like a bad cut of steak
But his bone looks like teak
As he drowns in her lake.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
I give this 2 gladthumbs down.
you verse worse than a suicidal clown
with a rubber AK47
sending cops to clowncop heaven.
I give this 2 gladthumbs down.
you verse worse than a suicidal clown
with a rubber AK47
sending cops to clowncop heaven.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
rhyming 'down' and 'clown'?
you're breaking some new ground
for the third graders there,
scorpio_nad ir .
rhyming 'down' and 'clown'?
you're breaking some new ground
for the third graders there,
scorpio_nad ir .
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Word-
when you make the 3rd
grade
you'll have it made
cap'n
it'll happen
Word-
when you make the 3rd
grade
you'll have it made
cap'n
it'll happen
cpnglxynchos
+3 -0
not that i would know
(as we had never met)
we're like two hummingbirds
(who had also never met)
not that i would know
(as we had never met)
we're like two hummingbirds
(who had also never met)
thegoblins
+0 -0
We're like two fish
Who don't really know each other
but think well of each other, generally :)
We're like two fish
Who don't really know each other
but think well of each other, generally :)
bluemoon72
+1 -0
Well, here's hoping you eventually either rub your mucousy bellies against each other or leave egg sacs around for the free-flowing sperm floods to wash over.
Well, here's hoping you eventually either rub your mucousy bellies against each other or leave egg sacs around for the free-flowing sperm floods to wash over.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
In that classic, elegant way.
In that classic, elegant way.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
*we are like two cars
that went bump in the night
the makings of a hit-and-run.
*we are like two cars
that went bump in the night
the makings of a hit-and-run.
thegoblins
+0 -0
awww, you'd hit it and run?
awww, you'd hit it and run?
wazza
+0 -0
I assume that anyone who hit that and tried to run would be unable to, their knees being weak from close proximity to awesome .
I assume that anyone who hit that and tried to run would be unable to, their knees being weak from close proximity to awesome .
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i do not know what to make of you, wazza, other than a fine roast.
i do not know what to make of you, wazza, other than a fine roast.
wazza
+0 -0
you could make a hat?
you could make a hat?
hamscout
+2 -0
or a brooch,
or a Pterodactyl!
[IMGS OFF]
or a brooch,
or a Pterodactyl!
[IMGS OFF]
invidious
+1 -0
There's a sale at Penney's!
There's a sale at Penney's!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
me john, big tree!
me john, big tree!
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
dude, i have been completely and fully missing this soap opera.
dude, i have been completely and fully missing this soap opera.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
ALL. NIGHT. LONG.
ALL. NIGHT. LONG.
thegoblins
+0 -0
hjooooly shit you've changed
hjooooly shit you've changed
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
um...
what?
um...
what?
thegoblins
+0 -0
your picture thingie
your picture thingie
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
oh.
yes.
it is different.
[/literature for morons]
oh.
yes.
it is different.
[/literature for morons]
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Y'all should talk on the phone. Where you could understand each other. And bond.
/shadchan
Y'all should talk on the phone. Where you could understand each other. And bond.
/shadchan
falseprophet
+2 -0
You mean that chick that I... bond?
You mean that chick that I... bond?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
hey, just because you missed your connecting flight for our dinner yesterday does not give you the right to be all cry cry at us.
hey, just because you missed your connecting flight for our dinner yesterday does not give you the right to be all cry cry at us.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
You remembered! I didn't miss the flight; I refuse to take anything other than non-stop.
You remembered! I didn't miss the flight; I refuse to take anything other than non-stop.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
you forgot! the flight was non-stop.
you forgot! the flight was non-stop.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
then why would there be a connecting flight?
then why would there be a connecting flight?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
'cos that is the joke.
'cos that is the joke.
thegoblins
+0 -0
The phone is so scary. Hearing people's voices after a long absence freaks the eff out of me.
The phone is so scary. Hearing people's voices after a long absence freaks the eff out of me.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
what do you mean? i hear them ALL the time. (even when i'm asleep!)
this is not generally true.
what do you mean? i hear them ALL the time. (even when i'm asleep!)
this is not generally true.
wazza
+0 -0
last few days I have been hearing Carl Sagan's voice in my mind just all the time:
https://www.yousendit.com/download/ZW9Db2VITmE1bmhjR0E9PQ
last few days I have been hearing Carl Sagan's voice in my mind just all the time:
https://www.yousendit.com/download/ZW9Db2VITmE1bmhjR0E9PQ
puguglypress
+1 -0
Was Teodor's comment a subtle dig at Lyle?
Was Teodor's comment a subtle dig at Lyle?
lateadopter
+1 -1
I tried to rate the previous strip, but I just couldn't decide if I liked it or hated it. This one got a 5 from me. Same topic, better execution, actual laugh resulting.
I tried to rate the previous strip, but I just couldn't decide if I liked it or hated it. This one got a 5 from me. Same topic, better execution, actual laugh resulting.
gladi8orrex
+9 -0
I wish we culd move eway form a judgemental h8ful cultur o serlve service an lies an instead adobt a more--
dance friendly attitude towards eachother
let teh beats shower over u an try not 2 b such a fuckin critical asshole alla teh time.
q**`.`**`,`-"Whistle"-`,`**`.`**p
I wish we culd move eway form a judgemental h8ful cultur o serlve service an lies an instead adobt a more--
dance friendly attitude towards eachother
let teh beats shower over u an try not 2 b such a fuckin critical asshole alla teh time.
q**`.`**`,`-"Whistle"-`,`**`.`**p
puguglypress
+0 -0
A comment left by puguglypress was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by mksta1000, gladi8orrex, Courtland, streever, cpnglxynchos, thing)
A comment left by puguglypress was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by mksta1000, gladi8orrex, Courtland, streever, cpnglxynchos, thing)
gladi8orrex
+1 -0
who teh fuck r u to say dat 2 me? fuck u, u donno me
who teh fuck r u to say dat 2 me? fuck u, u donno me
streever
+0 -0
I support your love of Yelle.
I support your love of Yelle.
ghff
+3 -0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJ6CSOLxbeM
Cre-moe, cre-moe pas,
Quelque part en alaska
Y'a un phoque qui s'ennuie en maudit
Sa blonde est partie
Gagner sa vie
Dans un cirque aux Etats-Unis
Quand le phoque est tout seul
Y r'garde le soleil
Qui descend doucement sure le glacee
Y pense au Etats en pleurant tout bas
C'est comme ca quand ta blond t'a lachee
Ca vaut pas la peine de laisser ceux qu'on aime
Pour aller faire tourner des ballons sur son nez
Ca faire rire les enfants, ca dure jamais longtemps
[ Moxy Fruvous Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]
Ca fail plus rire personne quand les enfants sont grands
Quand le phoque s'ennuie,
Y r'garde son poil qui brille
Comme les rues d'New York apres la pluie
Il reve a Chicago
Puis a Marilyn Monroe
Il voudrait voir sa blonde faire son show
C'est rien qu'un histoire
On peut pas m'en faire accoire
Mes des fois j'ai l'impression que c'est moe
Qu'y est assis sur la glace
Les deux mains dans la face
Mon amour est partie pis j'm'ennuie.
Ca vaut pas la peine de laisser ceux qu'on aime
Pour aller faire tourner des ballons sur son nez
Ca faire rire les enfants, ca dure jamais longtemps
Ca fait plus rire personne quand les enfants sont grands.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJ6CSOLxbeM
Believe me or believe me not
Somewhere in Alaska
There's a seal, a sad seal damn-it
Her blonde has left him
to make her way
In a circus in the United States
The seal is completely alone
He looks at the sun
Which descends gently on the glacier
He thinks of the States
crying very softly
That's how it goes when
your girlfriend lets go
It's not worth the trouble
to leave those that we love
To go to go spin a ball on your nose
It makes the children laugh
it never lasts too long
it makes no one laugh anymore
now that the kids are grown up
When the seal is melancholic,
He looks at his fur coat that shines
like the streets of New York after the rain
He dreams of Chicago
of Marilyn Monroe
He'd like to see his girlfriend do a show
This is nothing but a story
I cannot make myself believe it
But sometimes I have the impression that
it's me
sitting on the ice
my face in my both hands
My love has left me, then I'm sad.
It's not worth it
to leave those that we love
To go to go spin a ball on your nose
It makes the children laugh
it never lasts too long
it makes no one laugh anymore
now that the kids are big
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJ6CSOLxbeM
Cre-moe, cre-moe pas,
Quelque part en alaska
Y'a un phoque qui s'ennuie en maudit
Sa blonde est partie
Gagner sa vie
Dans un cirque aux Etats-Unis
Quand le phoque est tout seul
Y r'garde le soleil
Qui descend doucement sure le glacee
Y pense au Etats en pleurant tout bas
C'est comme ca quand ta blond t'a lachee
Ca vaut pas la peine de laisser ceux qu'on aime
Pour aller faire tourner des ballons sur son nez
Ca faire rire les enfants, ca dure jamais longtemps
[ Moxy Fruvous Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]
Ca fail plus rire personne quand les enfants sont grands
Quand le phoque s'ennuie,
Y r'garde son poil qui brille
Comme les rues d'New York apres la pluie
Il reve a Chicago
Puis a Marilyn Monroe
Il voudrait voir sa blonde faire son show
C'est rien qu'un histoire
On peut pas m'en faire accoire
Mes des fois j'ai l'impression que c'est moe
Qu'y est assis sur la glace
Les deux mains dans la face
Mon amour est partie pis j'm'ennuie.
Ca vaut pas la peine de laisser ceux qu'on aime
Pour aller faire tourner des ballons sur son nez
Ca faire rire les enfants, ca dure jamais longtemps
Ca fait plus rire personne quand les enfants sont grands.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJ6CSOLxbeM
Believe me or believe me not
Somewhere in Alaska
There's a seal, a sad seal damn-it
Her blonde has left him
to make her way
In a circus in the United States
The seal is completely alone
He looks at the sun
Which descends gently on the glacier
He thinks of the States
crying very softly
That's how it goes when
your girlfriend lets go
It's not worth the trouble
to leave those that we love
To go to go spin a ball on your nose
It makes the children laugh
it never lasts too long
it makes no one laugh anymore
now that the kids are grown up
When the seal is melancholic,
He looks at his fur coat that shines
like the streets of New York after the rain
He dreams of Chicago
of Marilyn Monroe
He'd like to see his girlfriend do a show
This is nothing but a story
I cannot make myself believe it
But sometimes I have the impression that
it's me
sitting on the ice
my face in my both hands
My love has left me, then I'm sad.
It's not worth it
to leave those that we love
To go to go spin a ball on your nose
It makes the children laugh
it never lasts too long
it makes no one laugh anymore
now that the kids are big
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
yelle=very yes.
glad, i thought you might enjoy this . you also may not.
yelle=very yes.
glad, i thought you might enjoy this . you also may not.
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
ur zipper-heads play they drumz too slow.
but i admit it was fun so maybe thas wat counts
ur zipper-heads play they drumz too slow.
but i admit it was fun so maybe thas wat counts
muh
+0 -0
that's great cpnglx I looked at it briefly but I'm trying to recover from depression just now so I don't want to risk having a seizure or something just right now...
that's great cpnglx I looked at it briefly but I'm trying to recover from depression just now so I don't want to risk having a seizure or something just right now...
gladi8orrex
+2 -0
cheer the fuck up, jesus christ
cheer the fuck up, jesus christ
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
man, what is your problem? ain't you live through the 60's?
man, what is your problem? ain't you live through the 60's?
lateadopter
+1 -0
I can vaguely picture the Onstadian representation of a woman's child-bearing mechanism, but I don't have the imagination or photobuggery skills to fill in the labels on all the dials. Perhaps edwell, hamscout, or echidnaboy would like to try.
I can vaguely picture the Onstadian representation of a woman's child-bearing mechanism, but I don't have the imagination or photobuggery skills to fill in the labels on all the dials. Perhaps edwell, hamscout, or echidnaboy would like to try.
hamscout
+45 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
nice-on-water
+1 -1
I hate myself for loving you.
I hate myself for loving you.
thegoblins
+0 -0
I see it as utterly consistent with my morals and worldview that I love Hamscout.
I see it as utterly consistent with my morals and worldview that I love Hamscout.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
This is just...wonderful.
This is just...wonderful.
xi
+0 -0
If only babies came out that fastly, "thonk" sound effect or no.
If only babies came out that fastly, "thonk" sound effect or no.
wazza
+1 -0
according to my mother, I did.
I was the third in my family, however.
according to my mother, I did.
I was the third in my family, however.
awksedperl
+2 -0
"And let me demonstrate by pushing this uncooked Cornish game hen through these gray drapes."
"And let me demonstrate by pushing this uncooked Cornish game hen through these gray drapes."
puguglypress
+0 -0
I sure don't remember the episode your avatar came from!
I sure don't remember the episode your avatar came from!
xi
+0 -0
It was the one where everyone contracted that alien disease that made them behave strangely. You know, that one. The virus was called Bukoki, or Bukake, or something.
It was the one where everyone contracted that alien disease that made them behave strangely. You know, that one. The virus was called Bukoki, or Bukake, or something.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Profit! I think I need a Squish Mitten. Maybe this thing here will do...
Profit! I think I need a Squish Mitten. Maybe this thing here will do...
troy_convers
+0 -0
'Thonk' sound effect? You been listening to Bill Hicks tirade about rutting?
'Thonk' sound effect? You been listening to Bill Hicks tirade about rutting?
shinkusan
+0 -0
Finally, we figured out what step 2 was.
Finally, we figured out what step 2 was.
invidious
+3 -0
I approve how the strip club patron in the first panel has both U.S. dollars AND Euros available to dispense to the girls. This is a dude ready for a lap dance in over 38 countries.
I approve how the strip club patron in the first panel has both U.S. dollars AND Euros available to dispense to the girls. This is a dude ready for a lap dance in over 38 countries.
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
sounds like a Jay-Z video.
sounds like a Jay-Z video.
daidai
+2 -0
or Bill Clinton
or Bill Clinton
paperboy_2000
+0 -0
Je fait il pleut tout alto dans ici!
Nope, just doesn't have the same ring...
Je fait il pleut tout alto dans ici!
Nope, just doesn't have the same ring...
rascaldom
+0 -0
If this is what "story arc" is, I'm definitely willing to try it. Definitely willing to try it.
If this is what "story arc" is, I'm definitely willing to try it. Definitely willing to try it.
xi
+0 -1
And I bet you're just an excellent driver.
And I bet you're just an excellent driver.
octafish
+0 -0
Who's on first...
Who's on first...
bluemoon72
+0 -0
I hear he loves Wapner.
I hear he loves Wapner.
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Wapner!? I never even met her.
Wapner!? I never even met her.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
hey-o!
hey-o!
andrewlevine
+1 -0
I don't like where this is going for Mr. Bear. Polly is going to see this sub-literate muddle, wrongly assume that it's a glimpse into the "real" Connie and that the gentleman she fell in love with is a put-on, and tearfully break up.
I don't like where this is going for Mr. Bear. Polly is going to see this sub-literate muddle, wrongly assume that it's a glimpse into the "real" Connie and that the gentleman she fell in love with is a put-on, and tearfully break up.
puguglypress
+0 -1
God, we hope so!!!
God, we hope so!!!
puguglypress
+19 -0
Although this would be an even better end for Polly.
[IMGS OFF]
Although this would be an even better end for Polly.
[IMGS OFF]
loki
+1 -1
My feelings on Polly's appearance in any strip:
[IMGS OFF]
My feelings on Polly's appearance in any strip:
[IMGS OFF]
awksedperl
+0 -0
However, according to the Onstad Law Of the Conservation Of Female Characters, if Polly goes, Tina comes back.
However, according to the Onstad Law Of the Conservation Of Female Characters, if Polly goes, Tina comes back.
falseprophet
+0 -0
No!
No!
all-star951
+0 -0
NO!
NO!
autrepoupee
+2 -1
I don't want any ladies! No girls allowed!
Only moms! Exclusively mothers of the main cats!
I'm not kidding!
I don't want any ladies! No girls allowed!
Only moms! Exclusively mothers of the main cats!
I'm not kidding!
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Bloom County/A-Team Syndrome. Chicks slow down the fraternal action.
Bloom County/A-Team Syndrome. Chicks slow down the fraternal action.
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
If there are girls, how will I ever marry my favorite Achewood cat and/or stuffed animal? (Do not take into consideration that they are cats, or that they are drawings. These are things we can work around.)
If there are girls, how will I ever marry my favorite Achewood cat and/or stuffed animal? (Do not take into consideration that they are cats, or that they are drawings. These are things we can work around.)
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Or the fact that you're already engaged.
Or the fact that you're already engaged.
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
Because that's the biggest obstacle?
Because that's the biggest obstacle?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
That's the only one you can't work around with your Imagination!
That's the only one you can't work around with your Imagination!
shinkusan
+0 -0
I must have missed something terrible about Polly. Why do we not like her?
I must have missed something terrible about Polly. Why do we not like her?
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
She is not believable.
She is not believable.
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Akin the the ol' "whore with a heart of gold" canard. We like to delude ourselves that sex workers are erudite bon vivants that choose a line of work that indulges their libertine, free-thinking ethos.
Fact is, 99.99 percent of the time they are crack-addicted victims of abuse for which stripping is another inexorable step toward their ultimate end by suicide, murder or overdose.
Akin the the ol' "whore with a heart of gold" canard. We like to delude ourselves that sex workers are erudite bon vivants that choose a line of work that indulges their libertine, free-thinking ethos.
Fact is, 99.99 percent of the time they are crack-addicted victims of abuse for which stripping is another inexorable step toward their ultimate end by suicide, murder or overdose.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Of course, I only get lap dances from the 1 in 10,000 that is a true libertine.
Of course, I only get lap dances from the 1 in 10,000 that is a true libertine.
neonfreon
+2 -0
true libertines are actually immune to herpes
true libertines are actually immune to herpes
comrade_tom
+0 -0
"Ladies, I am ALWAYS up for it."
"Ladies, I am ALWAYS up for it."
thegoblins
+0 -0
I like the "I'm not a whore because I enjoy what I'm doing" mentality.
I like the "I'm not a whore because I enjoy what I'm doing" mentality.
wazza
+0 -0
I feel that Polly is more of the kind of thing you see down here... an ordinary girl down on her luck who took on the dancing/whoring to raise some extra dosh. Luckily, she met C before she got too far into the scene.
I feel that Polly is more of the kind of thing you see down here... an ordinary girl down on her luck who took on the dancing/whoring to raise some extra dosh. Luckily, she met C before she got too far into the scene.
puguglypress
+0 -0
Chubbied for making me feel like shit.
Chubbied for making me feel like shit.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
come on, Alex.
you can do it.
come on, Alex.
you can do it.
falseprophet
+0 -0
come on, Alex.
there's nothin to it!
come on, Alex.
there's nothin to it!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
if you want something,
if you want something,
falseprophet
+0 -0
don't ask for nothin!
don't ask for nothin!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
if you want nothing!
if you want nothing!
falseprophet
+1 -0
Don't ask for somethin!
Don't ask for somethin!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.
hurrah.
thanks for the help, falseprophet.
yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.
hurrah.
thanks for the help, falseprophet.
agentcimorene
+0 -0
I'm forwarding these to all my girlfriends that work at Ten's Night Club. Nikita and Lizzie Stardust \m/
I'm forwarding these to all my girlfriends that work at Ten's Night Club. Nikita and Lizzie Stardust \m/
wtfoxnews
+0 -0
Strip was good even without the alt text. That being said, the alt text pushes it to 5.
Strip was good even without the alt text. That being said, the alt text pushes it to 5.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i never looked at it until you said something. it is completely like a story i would write; usually kids in some horrible Circumstance with some sort of parental failure typically involved...mmyep.
i never looked at it until you said something. it is completely like a story i would write; usually kids in some horrible Circumstance with some sort of parental failure typically involved...mmyep.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Cheap plug.
Cheap plug.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
what? who do you think i am, spinynorman?
what? who do you think i am, spinynorman?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I just call 'em as I see 'em, friendo.
I just call 'em as I see 'em, friendo.
thegoblins
+2 -1
Every Coen movie ever: some douches go and do douchie things. So overrated.
Every Coen movie ever: some douches go and do douchie things. So overrated.
icecube
+0 -0
Whoa whoa whoa. Whoa. First of all, fuck you. Second of all, the Coen Brothers are the signle greatest (etc...)
Whoa whoa whoa. Whoa. First of all, fuck you. Second of all, the Coen Brothers are the signle greatest (etc...)
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa yes whoa.
Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa yes whoa.
thegoblins
+0 -0
MWA HA HA HA
MWA HA HA HA
falseprophet
+0 -0
Invented by the dudes from Abba, the Isosceles Lock has revolutionized (etc...)
Invented by the dudes from Abba, the Isosceles Lock has revolutionized (etc...)
ethelthefrog
+0 -0
This is quite possibly my favorite alt text ever.
This is quite possibly my favorite alt text ever.
streever
+0 -0
abort, abort. the achewood machine is about to explode.
abort, abort. the achewood machine is about to explode.
streever
+1 -0
Yea, as a one-off, I'd dig this one, or yesterday's. To write this out as a story arc... maybe I'm still just burned over the last one. I think it's time to abort the mission.
Yea, as a one-off, I'd dig this one, or yesterday's. To write this out as a story arc... maybe I'm still just burned over the last one. I think it's time to abort the mission.
llobstrosity
+0 -0
Now that T is presumably rich from the OnStar settlement, has he taken to wearing nothing but a thong, like Ray? We haven't seen below his waist, and he doesn't typically go around without a shirt.
Now that T is presumably rich from the OnStar settlement, has he taken to wearing nothing but a thong, like Ray? We haven't seen below his waist, and he doesn't typically go around without a shirt.
hatstand_mcq
+2 -0
Once you've got over a million in cash in your bank account, no-one cares if you walk around birthday-suit. Get more than a billion and you can start doing it with an erection.
Once you've got over a million in cash in your bank account, no-one cares if you walk around birthday-suit. Get more than a billion and you can start doing it with an erection.
featurelessvoid
+2 -0
Indeed
Indeed
majestictrout
+16 -0
I've never wanted to follow a link less in my life.
I've never wanted to follow a link less in my life.
thegoblins
+1 -0
I am very much for people walking around the house with erections. This thought is pleasing to me.
I am very much for people walking around the house with erections. This thought is pleasing to me.
streever
+0 -0
Especially if they belong to Buffet/Gates
Especially if they belong to Buffet/Gates
stereo
+0 -0
Buffet actually holds the intellectual properties on erections. You implicitly sign your boner over to him by letting the blood flow into it.
Buffet actually holds the intellectual properties on erections. You implicitly sign your boner over to him by letting the blood flow into it.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Which I thought was largely an involuntary operation?
Which I thought was largely an involuntary operation?
muh
+0 -0
not completely. Human_sexual_arousal is controlled partly by one's state of mind. For instance, if one is turned on by naked women, but one subscribes (either consciously or subconsciously) to an incest taboo, one may not be turned on by the sight of one's naked sister. The 2004 study at Northwestern University that found that women were more likely to be turned on by lesbian porn than men to be turned on by homosexual porn featuring males, may have been flawed because men may be more likely than females in American culture to harbor anti-male-homosexual taboo versus anti-lesbian taboo.
As with all things involving self-control of the mind, the degree to which an individual may consciously regulate sexual arousal, and resulting erection, will vary from one individual to the next.
not completely. Human_sexual_arousal is controlled partly by one's state of mind. For instance, if one is turned on by naked women, but one subscribes (either consciously or subconsciously) to an incest taboo, one may not be turned on by the sight of one's naked sister. The 2004 study at Northwestern University that found that women were more likely to be turned on by lesbian porn than men to be turned on by homosexual porn featuring males, may have been flawed because men may be more likely than females in American culture to harbor anti-male-homosexual taboo versus anti-lesbian taboo.
As with all things involving self-control of the mind, the degree to which an individual may consciously regulate sexual arousal, and resulting erection, will vary from one individual to the next.
wazza
+0 -0
on the other hand, anticipation of sexual contact, regardless of the desire to engage, can trigger arousal in females, apparently as a way of preventing certain very dangerous rape-related injuries.
on the other hand, anticipation of sexual contact, regardless of the desire to engage, can trigger arousal in females, apparently as a way of preventing certain very dangerous rape-related injuries.
octafish
+1 -0
Give him your erections, he needs them.
[IMGS OFF]
Give him your erections, he needs them.
[IMGS OFF]
wazza
+0 -0
he is wasting away, and only erection transplants can save him.
Some people claim that there's a woman to blame, but it's the stingy dudes that are responsible now.
he is wasting away, and only erection transplants can save him.
Some people claim that there's a woman to blame, but it's the stingy dudes that are responsible now.
jonno
+0 -0
Citizens! Lend me your bonk-ons!
Citizens! Lend me your bonk-ons!
expellens
+0 -0
Your dad will notice you changing a tire in the rain. But then he'll quietly turn in his chair and shut the blinds and never speak of it again.
Your dad will notice you changing a tire in the rain. But then he'll quietly turn in his chair and shut the blinds and never speak of it again.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Until that day, years later, sitting in the stern of your whaler on the lake, as the sun cascades through the trees on the far bank, when he says over his shoulder, rod and reel in hand: "Wern't tight 'nuff."
Until that day, years later, sitting in the stern of your whaler on the lake, as the sun cascades through the trees on the far bank, when he says over his shoulder, rod and reel in hand: "Wern't tight 'nuff."
seanbad
+3 -0
Fishing for... Lake whales?
Fishing for... Lake whales?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
check yourself
check yourself
awksedperl
+2 -0
I do not dispute you, nice, and thank you for reminding me to undertake the prophylaxis of chiggity-checking myself before I riggedy-wreck myself. These regular checkups are vital for those of us over 40 whose Hip Hop references are more than 15 years old.
I do not dispute you, nice, and thank you for reminding me to undertake the prophylaxis of chiggity-checking myself before I riggedy-wreck myself. These regular checkups are vital for those of us over 40 whose Hip Hop references are more than 15 years old.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Some say I'm an old soul. Others call it misguided irony. Still others call it a mental defect. YOU DECIDE.
Some say I'm an old soul. Others call it misguided irony. Still others call it a mental defect. YOU DECIDE.
seanbad
+1 -0
Holy shit, lake whales . I feel I have checked myself and yet still wrecked myself .
Holy shit, lake whales . I feel I have checked myself and yet still wrecked myself .
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it is seemingly pretend.
it is seemingly pretend.
seanbad
+0 -0
How I am so GOD DAMNED stupid and just do the stupidest thing possible every SINGLE SECOND OF THE GOD DAMNED DAY!
How I am so GOD DAMNED stupid and just do the stupidest thing possible every SINGLE SECOND OF THE GOD DAMNED DAY!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
beats me, man. beats me why some dudes don't pay attention. if i knew, which you think i would, i'd tell you. but since i do not pay attention...so it goes.
beats me, man. beats me why some dudes don't pay attention. if i knew, which you think i would, i'd tell you. but since i do not pay attention...so it goes.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I saw North Shore and got excited because I live near the NS of Long Island, which has the Long Island Sound, of course, which is itself connected to the Atlantic Ocean, so it's plausible that a whale could stray in there, but alas, twasn't to be.
I saw North Shore and got excited because I live near the NS of Long Island, which has the Long Island Sound, of course, which is itself connected to the Atlantic Ocean, so it's plausible that a whale could stray in there, but alas, twasn't to be.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
the page obviously meant to be about the North Shore of Oahu but completely mucked it up.
the page obviously meant to be about the North Shore of Oahu but completely mucked it up.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Um.
Um.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
This is my back yard! Mad props for the North Shore of lovely Lake Superior.
This is my back yard! Mad props for the North Shore of lovely Lake Superior.
lateadopter
+0 -0
I just got the mass e-mail from Onstad about the book signings this week. Made me feel all special. Then I realized I could only think that made me special if I was like Robert de Niro in King of Comedy , but I'll take it.
I just got the mass e-mail from Onstad about the book signings this week. Made me feel all special. Then I realized I could only think that made me special if I was like Robert de Niro in King of Comedy , but I'll take it.
featurelessvoid
+6 -1
We were promised one-off cartoons.
We were promised one-off cartoons.
johnmatrix
+0 -0
Hey, be fair. He never used the word "promise". There are varying degrees of vows/swears, and a true promise is more binding then just "I'mma do this".
Hey, be fair. He never used the word "promise". There are varying degrees of vows/swears, and a true promise is more binding then just "I'mma do this".
synral
+0 -2
Connie will ignore Teodor.
Connie will do things his own way.
This will please an idiosyncratic target market.
Achewood continues another hackneyed "strange ideas are unexpectedly successful" setup.
Connie will ignore Teodor.
Connie will do things his own way.
This will please an idiosyncratic target market.
Achewood continues another hackneyed "strange ideas are unexpectedly successful" setup.
gladi8orrex
+8 -1
Y CRITISIZE LIKE ANYONE GIVES A FUCK WAT U GOTTA THINK ABOT TEH STRIP. JUST ENJOY AN STFU OR NOT AND ALSO STFU EITHER WAY I DON GIVE A SHIT WAT U ASSHOLE CRITCS GOTTA SAY JUS LET OSTRAD DO IS THING
Y CRITISIZE LIKE ANYONE GIVES A FUCK WAT U GOTTA THINK ABOT TEH STRIP. JUST ENJOY AN STFU OR NOT AND ALSO STFU EITHER WAY I DON GIVE A SHIT WAT U ASSHOLE CRITCS GOTTA SAY JUS LET OSTRAD DO IS THING
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
if you didnt care, you wouldnt post.
if you didnt care, you wouldnt post.
synral
+0 -2
Decoding language is a chore, isn't it?
Sub-literate opinions are a good alternative.
Decoding language is a chore, isn't it?
Sub-literate opinions are a good alternative.
gladi8orrex
+3 -0
u think ur better than me cuzza u scored high marx n ur fascist public colleges wwell fuck u buddy i LITERALLY do not give a shit n ur logic is as bad as ur farmer hairline who keeps reseeding alla on ur shit face.
cocksucker finks he so smot
u think ur better than me cuzza u scored high marx n ur fascist public colleges wwell fuck u buddy i LITERALLY do not give a shit n ur logic is as bad as ur farmer hairline who keeps reseeding alla on ur shit face.
cocksucker finks he so smot
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Am i going to be the first one to make a Marx/facism joke?
Am i going to be the first one to make a Marx/facism joke?
synral
+0 -1
Should I assume your avatar depicts you?
Should I assume your avatar depicts you?
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
ur asking cuz that ugly prick in ur pic is u, isn't it? i hope not dood. wouldn't wish dat mug on a dead man's been shot in teh face, so...
ur asking cuz that ugly prick in ur pic is u, isn't it? i hope not dood. wouldn't wish dat mug on a dead man's been shot in teh face, so...
synral
+0 -0
A comment left by synral was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, sardoniclaconic, Troy_Convers, shambles, mrblank91)
A comment left by synral was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, sardoniclaconic, Troy_Convers, shambles, mrblank91)
gladi8orrex
+5 -0
opp, someone's a big asshole who finks he smottest man in rooms who lashes out at 0 warning.
no reasonin' wit sum1 like dat. time 2 take da obama high-road an' discontinue dis. ur obv. not worth time
opp, someone's a big asshole who finks he smottest man in rooms who lashes out at 0 warning.
no reasonin' wit sum1 like dat. time 2 take da obama high-road an' discontinue dis. ur obv. not worth time
synral
+0 -1
Your seeming popularity around here befuddles me. Utterly.
Another reminder of why this is my first, and likely last, foray into Assetbar.
Your seeming popularity around here befuddles me. Utterly.
Another reminder of why this is my first, and likely last, foray into Assetbar.
cpnglxynchos
+2 -0
hey, man, first of all, welcome to the assetbarrio.
secondly, this still my first foray to the place.
next, don't let glad get to you. dude is somewhat of a concept poster and we like it and the glimpses of his personality that've broken through the malformed engrish. you both just calm down and who knows what'll happen!
again, chill, and, double-again, welcome.
unless you're aiu.
then up yours, you old female.
hey, man, first of all, welcome to the assetbarrio.
secondly, this still my first foray to the place.
next, don't let glad get to you. dude is somewhat of a concept poster and we like it and the glimpses of his personality that've broken through the malformed engrish. you both just calm down and who knows what'll happen!
again, chill, and, double-again, welcome.
unless you're aiu.
then up yours, you old female.
icecube
+1 -0
And just to clear up the facts, let it be known that "the smirking dude" is one of the default avatars that come with new accounts.
And just to clear up the facts, let it be known that "the smirking dude" is one of the default avatars that come with new accounts.
muh
+0 -0
synral hates us because we don't hate gladi8orrex :-<
synral hates us because we don't hate gladi8orrex :-<
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
yes it is.
yes it is.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
but actually, i remember seeing you around back in History.
but actually, i remember seeing you around back in History.
puguglypress
+0 -0
It's kinda like that movie "Mean Girls".
It's kinda like that movie "Mean Girls".
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
but with less girls.
but with less girls.
troy_convers
+0 -0
I actually had gladi8orrex on 'ignore'for the longest time, but then realised once you get past his unconventional syntax, he's quite profound.
Play nice now, synral...
I actually had gladi8orrex on 'ignore'for the longest time, but then realised once you get past his unconventional syntax, he's quite profound.
Play nice now, synral...
streever
+0 -0
he sometimes is funny/profound, mostly in-comprehensible. He's good for a one-off line or two. Don't let it bother you, dogg.
he sometimes is funny/profound, mostly in-comprehensible. He's good for a one-off line or two. Don't let it bother you, dogg.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Sometimes we get to see that he's actually a really good sort of person.
Sometimes we get to see that he's actually a really good sort of person.
falseprophet
+1 -0
I'm pretty sure gladdi has several shill accounts that he uses for the sole purpose of chubbying himself.
I'm pretty sure gladdi has several shill accounts that he uses for the sole purpose of chubbying himself.
gladi8orrex
+1 -0
y slander me, dogg? u so self-concious abot urself u gota make stuff up? i feel bad 4 u
y slander me, dogg? u so self-concious abot urself u gota make stuff up? i feel bad 4 u
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Assetbar laconic iconic poets FIGHT!
Assetbar laconic iconic poets FIGHT!
synral
+0 -0
A sensible voice.
A sensible voice.
muh
+0 -0
If any account is a shill account of Gladi it's synral.
If any account is a shill account of Gladi it's synral.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Jeez, man, it's glad. He's the lovable troll. Let it go.
Jeez, man, it's glad. He's the lovable troll. Let it go.
comrade_tom
+2 -0
ORSTRAD WHY YOU GOTTA DO IS THING?
ORSTRAD WHY YOU GOTTA DO IS THING?
awksedperl
+1 -1
Is this how they they teach you to write at Choate (or Brown, if you've graduated from Choate)? For shame. Though it is important to have the common touch-of which you have a surfeit-we need our future elites to be literate (in the old-fashioned sense of the word), glad. Perhaps you could pen an occasional book review in "The New Criterion" or "The New York Review Of Books" to hone your middle-to-highbrow writing skills? Just a thought.*
*That was a sentence fragment, which is an example of something not to write.
Is this how they they teach you to write at Choate (or Brown, if you've graduated from Choate)? For shame. Though it is important to have the common touch-of which you have a surfeit-we need our future elites to be literate (in the old-fashioned sense of the word), glad. Perhaps you could pen an occasional book review in "The New Criterion" or "The New York Review Of Books" to hone your middle-to-highbrow writing skills? Just a thought.*
*That was a sentence fragment, which is an example of something not to write.
gladi8orrex
+2 -0
xcuse me yall. just tribbed ove' a stick in teh mud is all -_- o_o O_O O_O
fuck u awks i dun needa and foagy to hire hisself as my coach so piss off dude ur 2 outta touch
xcuse me yall. just tribbed ove' a stick in teh mud is all -_- o_o O_O O_O
fuck u awks i dun needa and foagy to hire hisself as my coach so piss off dude ur 2 outta touch
awksedperl
+0 -0
A comment left by awksedperl was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, firedmyass, Troy_Convers)
A comment left by awksedperl was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, firedmyass, Troy_Convers)
troy_convers
+0 -2
Strictly speaking, you are correct.
BUT WHO GIVES A F#CK YOU STUCK-UP TOSSER.
This is a forum, not English class. Go home.
Strictly speaking, you are correct.
BUT WHO GIVES A F#CK YOU STUCK-UP TOSSER.
This is a forum, not English class. Go home.
awksedperl
+0 -0
You don't have a lot of equanimity for a 109-year-old.
You don't have a lot of equanimity for a 109-year-old.
firedmyass
+0 -0
oops... I left all my equanimity in your dad's neck.
oops... I left all my equanimity in your dad's neck.
awksedperl
+0 -0
The centenarians is feisty on Assetbar. Kudos to you, Sir! May your plucky spirit never die (at least not before you do).
The centenarians is feisty on Assetbar. Kudos to you, Sir! May your plucky spirit never die (at least not before you do).
troy_convers
+0 -0
Kudos to you back.
Hmm, the things I have to put up with as an immortal.
Kudos to you back.
Hmm, the things I have to put up with as an immortal.
firedmyass
+0 -0
It must be a chore, all that ennui constantly flooding from you like thin gravy.
And the biscuits they bring... they are always so disappointing, aren't they?
It must be a chore, all that ennui constantly flooding from you like thin gravy.
And the biscuits they bring... they are always so disappointing, aren't they?
troy_convers
+0 -0
Annnnnnnd, ignore. firedmyass? ignoreyourass, more like.
Annnnnnnd, ignore. firedmyass? ignoreyourass, more like.
jonno
+0 -0
haha good one man had me in stitches
haha good one man had me in stitches
xi
+2 -0
He never pinky swore .
He never pinky swore .
geysershitdick
+2 -0
https://achewood.com/index.php?date=01232008
Was Cornelius the wise man that Ray learned the proverb in Panel 5 from? Or is "never show a fool half a job" a more common saying than I thought? I've never heard it outside of achewood, but a google search of the phrase doesn't return much.
https://achewood.com/index.php?date=01232008
Was Cornelius the wise man that Ray learned the proverb in Panel 5 from? Or is "never show a fool half a job" a more common saying than I thought? I've never heard it outside of achewood, but a google search of the phrase doesn't return much.
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
it's one of the things that shows up if you type .fortune into some unix ( not unix! ) platforms.
it's one of the things that shows up if you type .fortune into some unix ( not unix! ) platforms.
camidumas
+1 -0
I say it half the time.
I say it half the time.
davey-boy
+1 -0
I am a low man for knowing which tires will keep me from careening helplessly off the road during an Albertan winter. :(
I am a low man for knowing which tires will keep me from careening helplessly off the road during an Albertan winter. :(
all-star951
+1 -0
Are you canadian? That's pretty awesome. I got canadian peeps
Are you canadian? That's pretty awesome. I got canadian peeps
weapon86
+1 -0
Chubbied for Albertan winters. Last AB winter taught me that tires are meaningless while driving in the rain on a snow-packed road. Flawless 360 to guard-rail grind at 30km/h.
Chubbied for Albertan winters. Last AB winter taught me that tires are meaningless while driving in the rain on a snow-packed road. Flawless 360 to guard-rail grind at 30km/h.
wingspan
+0 -0
A comment left by wingspan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by randombeing, weapon86, mrblank91)
A comment left by wingspan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by randombeing, weapon86, mrblank91)
all-star951
+2 -2
Dude, km means kilometers. It's metric.
Dude, km means kilometers. It's metric.
wingspan
+2 -1
You're metric.
You're metric.
all-star951
+0 -0
your mother is metric
as I discovered last night
your mother is metric
as I discovered last night
wingspan
+0 -0
Then you're a perfect match! Hi, New Daddy!
Then you're a perfect match! Hi, New Daddy!
awksedperl
+1 -0
So, did your 8mm tool do the job, then?
(Sorry, I just want to feel like one of the guys, even though all-star951 is a three-year-old girl.)
So, did your 8mm tool do the job, then?
(Sorry, I just want to feel like one of the guys, even though all-star951 is a three-year-old girl.)
jonno
+0 -0
8 megametres? Fuck.
8 megametres? Fuck.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
nah, 'cos then the first 'm' probably would have been capitalized.
nah, 'cos then the first 'm' probably would have been capitalized.
jonno
+0 -0
o rite
o rite
wazza
+0 -0
it's 8 millimetres, or roughly the width of your pinkie fingernail.
it's 8 millimetres, or roughly the width of your pinkie fingernail.
octafish
+0 -0
Your pinkie fingernail maybe...
Your pinkie fingernail maybe...
stereo
+0 -0
Nope, mine is 8mm too. You're the freak here.
Nope, mine is 8mm too. You're the freak here.
wingspan
+1 -0
Ok guys, if you didn't like the joke I made feel free to lame away, but please grant me the benefit of the doubt the I know what a kilometer is and that in some parts of the world people drive them per hour. I did not need to be told this.
Ok guys, if you didn't like the joke I made feel free to lame away, but please grant me the benefit of the doubt the I know what a kilometer is and that in some parts of the world people drive them per hour. I did not need to be told this.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Dude.
Dude.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
no.
no.
puguglypress
+0 -0
He had somewhere to be!
He had somewhere to be!
octafish
+5 -0
I've got two Toyos on the front of my car.
It's a high pitched sound
Hot rubber eternally pressing against a blackened pavement
A wheel is forever
A car is infinity times four
I've got two Toyos on the front of my car.
It's a high pitched sound
Hot rubber eternally pressing against a blackened pavement
A wheel is forever
A car is infinity times four
dybrar
+0 -0
Severely chubbied for I76 goodness, and for making me go read the web page with all the poems again.
Severely chubbied for I76 goodness, and for making me go read the web page with all the poems again.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
I just put 4 TigerPaws on my Infiniti.
wtf are we talking about?
I just put 4 TigerPaws on my Infiniti.
wtf are we talking about?
stereo
+0 -0
I tried to put tigerpaws on my mustang but it ran away
what?
I tried to put tigerpaws on my mustang but it ran away
what?
fedallah
+1 -0
Nice!
A shame that the sequel was so terrible.
Nice!
A shame that the sequel was so terrible.
falseprophet
+2 -0
I tried to read this to the opening lines of "Don't Stop Believin'."
I apologize.
I tried to read this to the opening lines of "Don't Stop Believin'."
I apologize.
nice-on-water
+1 -0
Status: Homeboy
Conditions: Yes
Status: Homeboy
Conditions: Yes
deus
+0 -0
MAN! bear is simply murdering the design there.
MAN! bear is simply murdering the design there.
deus
+0 -0
I mean...anyone remember when they first discoverd clipart?
I mean...anyone remember when they first discoverd clipart?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
why can't you finish your thoughts before your hit post? (i discovered clipart in first grade. nothing special. never used it. the end.)
why can't you finish your thoughts before your hit post? (i discovered clipart in first grade. nothing special. never used it. the end.)
deus
+0 -0
Need to lay the work for the punchline.
if any....
Also, you discovered clipart when you were 7 and you DIDN'T USE IT!
WHATS WRONG WITH YOU!!?
Need to lay the work for the punchline.
if any....
Also, you discovered clipart when you were 7 and you DIDN'T USE IT!
WHATS WRONG WITH YOU!!?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it was more fun to DRAW.
it was more fun to DRAW.
deus
+0 -0
Well, i had Kid Pix....and i modified the pixel stamps....so we had a guy and a gal having sex on a pickup truck.
I also pixel painted tanya hansen nude.....
yeah...im blaming ADHD for that.
Well, i had Kid Pix....and i modified the pixel stamps....so we had a guy and a gal having sex on a pickup truck.
I also pixel painted tanya hansen nude.....
yeah...im blaming ADHD for that.
stereo
+1 -0
did you replace the stamp music with porno riffs?
did you replace the stamp music with porno riffs?
deus
+0 -0
.....damn...i knew i was missing something...
But the *thump* *thump* or *boing* sounds seemed proper.
.....damn...i knew i was missing something...
But the *thump* *thump* or *boing* sounds seemed proper.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
oh man i totally remember playing on kid pix in school...rad.
oh man i totally remember playing on kid pix in school...rad.
thegoblins
+0 -0
I remember that we used computers in my kindergarten years. We had some sort of incomprehensible system of pictures that was somehow meant to teach us to read and write. I spent most of my time up to age seven in some sort of dissociative fugue, though, so I feel the importance of computers was quite lost on me.
I remember that we used computers in my kindergarten years. We had some sort of incomprehensible system of pictures that was somehow meant to teach us to read and write. I spent most of my time up to age seven in some sort of dissociative fugue, though, so I feel the importance of computers was quite lost on me.
thegoblins
+1 -0
Kindergarten year. That's what comes of being a pretentious douche. DAMNIT, ME.
Kindergarten year. That's what comes of being a pretentious douche. DAMNIT, ME.
falseprophet
+4 -0
"Dear mrs. thegoblins
Your daughter has repeatedly been quite uppity in class. Every time we are doing a lesson on squares she raises her hands and asks questions about octogons. I do not think she will ever be ready for first grade."
"Dear mrs. thegoblins
Your daughter has repeatedly been quite uppity in class. Every time we are doing a lesson on squares she raises her hands and asks questions about octogons. I do not think she will ever be ready for first grade."
camidumas
+3 -0
Did they send her to the octogonecologist?
Did they send her to the octogonecologist?
wazza
+0 -0
I tried to extrapolate this.
I envisaged the octospeculum.
I may never sleep again.
I tried to extrapolate this.
I envisaged the octospeculum.
I may never sleep again.
hamscout
+0 -0
This is how octo-moms get started.
This is how octo-moms get started.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
octo-gonnnnnnn, daddio!
octo-gonnnnnnn, daddio!
miaou
+1 -0
Playing with their octo-pus.
Playing with their octo-pus.
octafish
+0 -0
Leave my mother out of this!
Leave my mother out of this!
neonfreon
+0 -0
a cucumber is more likely in this case
a cucumber is more likely in this case
firedmyass
+0 -0
Clip art was never discovered. That shit was invented .
Clip art was never discovered. That shit was invented .
wazza
+0 -0
shame on you for thinking the one automatically excludes the other, firedmyass!
shame on you for thinking the one automatically excludes the other, firedmyass!
fandangit
+0 -0
Hafflefeffer for compound dingle rates, right now? Check the stones in your bridge. Ride it tough, you know? Like, like cho' beezle! Take it up a notch for the sake of preponderance in the case of howard vs. my ballsack on yo minge.
Pvt. Ticklesack never left the bike alone, now did he? NOW, Did he?
Hafflefeffer for compound dingle rates, right now? Check the stones in your bridge. Ride it tough, you know? Like, like cho' beezle! Take it up a notch for the sake of preponderance in the case of howard vs. my ballsack on yo minge.
Pvt. Ticklesack never left the bike alone, now did he? NOW, Did he?
wingspan
+2 -0
We already have one of these, thanks.
We already have one of these, thanks.
seanbad
+2 -0
(Brodmann area 22, in the posterior part of the superior temporal gyrus of the dominant hemisphere)
(Brodmann area 22, in the posterior part of the superior temporal gyrus of the dominant hemisphere)
mockereo
+0 -0
genuinely curious condition
genuinely curious condition
gyrate
+0 -0
Does it show up under the blacklight?
Does it show up under the blacklight?
morbo
+0 -0
quickest way to a threesome: bring your girlfriend with you. watch the propositions roll in. profit
quickest way to a threesome: bring your girlfriend with you. watch the propositions roll in. profit
omegatron
+0 -0
Propositions from dudes?
Propositions from dudes?
morbo
+0 -0
dancers, sir
dancers, sir
promnight
+1 -0
Newbie that I am at commenting, I have been reading for 2 years, and I gotta say, many are missing the potential of a strip club for dummies written by Cornelius. First of all, he is the James Bond of Achewood, sauve and sophisticated to the point his level of superiority is beyond the ken of even Ray, who was all full of scoffing at Cornelius the night he met Polly, and astonished at Cornelius's masterful moves, that allowed him to do what was impossible according to conventional wisdom, which was hook up with a dancer.
But whats better is, Cornelius is now dating an intelligent stripper, and will be able to present info from the other side, and it as started already, a tip to the patroons about what they look like from the perspective of the stage, and insight he could only have from Polly.
No, this "For Dummies" will be filled with advice it would do well for the hippest to take heed of.
I am not aware that the strip club culture has ever been described in a popular work from the perspective of the stripper, and certainly not by the likes of Onstadt. The surprises here will be in this form.
Newbie that I am at commenting, I have been reading for 2 years, and I gotta say, many are missing the potential of a strip club for dummies written by Cornelius. First of all, he is the James Bond of Achewood, sauve and sophisticated to the point his level of superiority is beyond the ken of even Ray, who was all full of scoffing at Cornelius the night he met Polly, and astonished at Cornelius's masterful moves, that allowed him to do what was impossible according to conventional wisdom, which was hook up with a dancer.
But whats better is, Cornelius is now dating an intelligent stripper, and will be able to present info from the other side, and it as started already, a tip to the patroons about what they look like from the perspective of the stage, and insight he could only have from Polly.
No, this "For Dummies" will be filled with advice it would do well for the hippest to take heed of.
I am not aware that the strip club culture has ever been described in a popular work from the perspective of the stripper, and certainly not by the likes of Onstadt. The surprises here will be in this form.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Quote:
Ah, well it turns out there is already so much "stripper lit" apparently that it is a cliche unto itself.
Quote:
I am not aware that the strip club culture has ever been described in a popular work from the perspective of the stripper.
Ah, well it turns out there is already so much "stripper lit" apparently that it is a cliche unto itself.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Quote:
My advice to you is to go back to lurking, Dummy.
[IMGS OFF]
Quote:
No, this "For Dummies" will be filled with advice it would do well for the hippest to take heed of.
My advice to you is to go back to lurking, Dummy.
[IMGS OFF]
hausea
+0 -0
Alt-text makes this one.
Alt-text makes this one.
expellens
+1 -0
first 5 i've given out since Beef and Molly's wedding.
first 5 i've given out since Beef and Molly's wedding.
sorry_chris
+2 -0
This is the first strip I've loved in a long, long time.
It is so good to see after a long day.
Thank ya much, Onstad.
This is the first strip I've loved in a long, long time.
It is so good to see after a long day.
Thank ya much, Onstad.
icecube
+0 -0
"The pictures mitigate the perceived chore of decoding language"
A friendly jab at us in comic-readership land?
"The pictures mitigate the perceived chore of decoding language"
A friendly jab at us in comic-readership land?
expellens
+1 -0
Speaking of pictures mitigating chores, I wish I could take credit for 'shopping this abomination. But it's for real ...
[IMGS OFF]
Speaking of pictures mitigating chores, I wish I could take credit for 'shopping this abomination. But it's for real ...
[IMGS OFF]
davey-boy
+0 -0
Oh, that hurts my very soul.
Oh, that hurts my very soul.
neonfreon
+0 -0
do magazines burn cooler or warmer than books?
do magazines burn cooler or warmer than books?
octafish
+0 -0
I know the photographer who shot that horse, he married a friend of mine from Uni. I'm pretty sure that wasn't shot for any particular client. I didn't really expect I'd see Julian's work on assetbar.
I know the photographer who shot that horse, he married a friend of mine from Uni. I'm pretty sure that wasn't shot for any particular client. I didn't really expect I'd see Julian's work on assetbar.
wazza
+1 -0
why was the horse shot?
why was the horse shot?
mr-siegal
+1 -0
Her hair made her bum look big.
Her hair made her bum look big.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Her hair was better than Joan Crawford's.
[IMGS OFF]
Her hair was better than Joan Crawford's.
[IMGS OFF]
granularsilica
+0 -0
MOM!
MOM!
emperordalek
+0 -0
Wow. A bit like a panel from a BATMAN comic with the Joker in, isn't it?
Wow. A bit like a panel from a BATMAN comic with the Joker in, isn't it?
gyrate
+0 -0
It's a little-known fact that the Joker went through a Flock of Seagulls phase.
It's a little-known fact that the Joker went through a Flock of Seagulls phase.
autrepoupee
+1 -0
chriiistiiiinaaaa....m o t h e r ' s h o m e . . . . . chriistiinaaaa
chriiistiiiinaaaa....m o t h e r ' s h o m e . . . . . chriistiinaaaa
thegoblins
+0 -0
Have you been letting a filthy man touch you with his poison-snake?
Have you been letting a filthy man touch you with his poison-snake?
troy_convers
+0 -0
Why the long face?
Why the long face?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Ha!
I've seen this issue too many times in the past month or so.
Ha!
I've seen this issue too many times in the past month or so.
icecube
+0 -0
13 things a burglar won't tell you? Seriously that cover looks like something Onstad would mock up as a joke in its own right. And I would laugh.
13 things a burglar won't tell you? Seriously that cover looks like something Onstad would mock up as a joke in its own right. And I would laugh.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I'm just sorry you missed the "13 things a mother-in-law won't tell you" issue that my friend's mom got out of the LIBRARY. Yes. Nothing more needs to be said, really.
I'm just sorry you missed the "13 things a mother-in-law won't tell you" issue that my friend's mom got out of the LIBRARY. Yes. Nothing more needs to be said, really.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Protein jeans? Is that the awful side-effect I've heard of that occurs when an innocent pothead can't find a rape victim?
Protein jeans? Is that the awful side-effect I've heard of that occurs when an innocent pothead can't find a rape victim?
thegoblins
+0 -0
As far as I know, potheads are not prone to violence.
As far as I know, potheads are not prone to violence.
octafish
+0 -0
KNOW YOUR DOPE FIEND. YOUR LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!
KNOW YOUR DOPE FIEND. YOUR LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!
camidumas
+0 -0
But... won't he respect my badge?!
But... won't he respect my badge?!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
not behind THOSE large shades!
not behind THOSE large shades!
octafish
+0 -0
"Tea" shades.
"Tea" shades.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Methinks in-pants ejaculation would leave a black-light-sensitive stain. Must experiment further.
Methinks in-pants ejaculation would leave a black-light-sensitive stain. Must experiment further.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Your experiments...are not much fun.
Your experiments...are not much fun.
muh
+1 -0
he didn't say whose pants he was talking about experimenting in...
he didn't say whose pants he was talking about experimenting in...
thegoblins
+0 -0
WHOAH trump that for KINKINESS!
Soooo I'm fairly buzzed right now :D
WHOAH trump that for KINKINESS!
Soooo I'm fairly buzzed right now :D
nice-on-water
+0 -0
So you decided to change your avicon again? For shame.
So you decided to change your avicon again? For shame.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
I like this one. It's like it's a kitten, but it's also like it's judging you.
I like this one. It's like it's a kitten, but it's also like it's judging you.
streever
+0 -0
I agree, I enjoy being judged by a tiny fluffy kitten.
I agree, I enjoy being judged by a tiny fluffy kitten.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I don't not like it, but I get confused when people change aviconatars so much. I've changed mine twice in the past year and a half or however long I've been here to avoid confusion because I KNOW EVERYONE wants to know who this great nice-on-water guy is.
I don't not like it, but I get confused when people change aviconatars so much. I've changed mine twice in the past year and a half or however long I've been here to avoid confusion because I KNOW EVERYONE wants to know who this great nice-on-water guy is.
thegoblins
+1 -0
I just don't like being me sometimes. Sometimes I want to be a pussy.
I just don't like being me sometimes. Sometimes I want to be a pussy.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I'm surprised it took this long for the pussy jokes to come out.
I'm surprised it took this long for the pussy jokes to come out.
granularsilica
+0 -0
I was trying to be polite, to match my new avatar/username (as of a few months ago).
I was trying to be polite, to match my new avatar/username (as of a few months ago).
muh
+0 -0
thegoblins you should not drink it is a character fault
thegoblins you should not drink it is a character fault
thegoblins
+0 -0
So who exactly am I hurting by drinking a little, giggling with my girlfriends and socializing with nice boys, and then being conveyed home in a safe manner?
So who exactly am I hurting by drinking a little, giggling with my girlfriends and socializing with nice boys, and then being conveyed home in a safe manner?
i_love_kate
+1 -0
I think what she means is "fuck along, now".
I think what she means is "fuck along, now".
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Plus, this is coming from a guy whose avatar includes a gorilla-finger-sized blunt?
Plus, this is coming from a guy whose avatar includes a gorilla-finger-sized blunt?
thegoblins
+0 -0
oh, lover of kate.
oh, lover of kate.
granularsilica
+1 -0
Quote:
Interesting idea, but look at it from the male point of view -- all women are potential scores, and you are just teasing them, which makes them even hornier, so they take it out on whoever they can find. It's a cruel world.
Quote:
So who exactly am I hurting by drinking a little, giggling with my girlfriends and socializing with nice boys, and then being conveyed home in a safe manner?
Interesting idea, but look at it from the male point of view -- all women are potential scores, and you are just teasing them, which makes them even hornier, so they take it out on whoever they can find. It's a cruel world.
muh
+1 -0
somewhere in the world there are lesbians without any alcohol to help fuel their orgies and you ask who you're hurting. *shakes head*
somewhere in the world there are lesbians without any alcohol to help fuel their orgies and you ask who you're hurting. *shakes head*
thegoblins
+1 -0
Um, allright, what the fucking hell? And GS, my flirting is not particularly of a "let's bone now" type. It's more...outlandish and confusing, I'd say.
Um, allright, what the fucking hell? And GS, my flirting is not particularly of a "let's bone now" type. It's more...outlandish and confusing, I'd say.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
A playa can get all shot down by outlandish and confusing flirting in this town.
A playa can get all shot down by outlandish and confusing flirting in this town.
wazza
+0 -0
I dunno... I... I kinda like it.
I dunno... I... I kinda like it.
muh
+0 -0
yeah that doesn't make much sense but it did last night.
mmm yeah it probably makes more sense to say that I'd say that anyone as manic as you should maybe avoid alcohol. maybe you're just hypomanic. anyway. whatevers.
yeah that doesn't make much sense but it did last night.
mmm yeah it probably makes more sense to say that I'd say that anyone as manic as you should maybe avoid alcohol. maybe you're just hypomanic. anyway. whatevers.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Yes, well, I think you know what you can do with yourself.
Yes, well, I think you know what you can do with yourself.
jthm_guitarist
+0 -0
Yeah this strip is like good old Achewood.
Good old Achewood, a time when
Yeah this strip is like good old Achewood.
Good old Achewood, a time when
obsidian_lance
+0 -0
Foxtrot, Uniform, Charlie, Kilo!
Foxtrot, Uniform, Charlie, Kilo!
neonfreon
+0 -0
aight so i aint really a strip club type a person so can someone please explain to me
do dudes really get their rocks off with their pants on in strip clubs?
do they kinda sit around in the dark corners away from the stage and somehow masturbate with their pants on, in the presence of a bunch of other kinda creepy type dudes?
cause that's gross
aight so i aint really a strip club type a person so can someone please explain to me
do dudes really get their rocks off with their pants on in strip clubs?
do they kinda sit around in the dark corners away from the stage and somehow masturbate with their pants on, in the presence of a bunch of other kinda creepy type dudes?
cause that's gross
granularsilica
+0 -0
Seems like some friction would be needed, like a lap dance. But there might be some hair-trigger types I'm not familiar with, being more of a Barry White, all night, tantric lover.
Seems like some friction would be needed, like a lap dance. But there might be some hair-trigger types I'm not familiar with, being more of a Barry White, all night, tantric lover.
farqussus
+0 -0
Barry White would have to be a tantric lover, seeing as how if he's still alive (turns out he's not) he (was) a gigantic blob of manlard who sweated profusely from the exertion of blinking. It would take all night for his withered, moss covered erection to fight its way from beneath his stretchmark streaked pillows of cellulite.
Barry White would have to be a tantric lover, seeing as how if he's still alive (turns out he's not) he (was) a gigantic blob of manlard who sweated profusely from the exertion of blinking. It would take all night for his withered, moss covered erection to fight its way from beneath his stretchmark streaked pillows of cellulite.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Have Mercy, farqussus!
Have Mercy, farqussus!
comrade_tom
+0 -0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wSZkgO7oVw&feature=related
video proof.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wSZkgO7oVw&feature=related
video proof.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Well, I meant his music more than the man hisself -- he extolled long zex.
Well, I meant his music more than the man hisself -- he extolled long zex.
lucidz
+0 -0
I went to a strip club once that had an aerosol can in the bathroom which read "Kills Aids".
I went to a strip club once that had an aerosol can in the bathroom which read "Kills Aids".
neonfreon
+0 -0
how racist
how racist
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Lysol has something similar printed on its can.
Lysol has something similar printed on its can.
neonfreon
+2 -0
So does Jesus
So does Jesus
muh
+0 -0
neonfreon you little scamp!
neonfreon you little scamp!
thegoblins
+0 -0
If Jesus has "kills AIDS" tattoed on his can...that just brings up so many distasteful implications that I am unwilling to explore further.
If Jesus has "kills AIDS" tattoed on his can...that just brings up so many distasteful implications that I am unwilling to explore further.
muh
+0 -0
But what it the Jesus aerosol is strawberry scented?
But what it the Jesus aerosol is strawberry scented?
neonfreon
+0 -0
Jesus thinks his shit don't stink
Jesus thinks his shit don't stink
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
To each, his own ca-ca smells sweet. Do not be fooled by this.
-- Forrest Gump , Gumpisms: The Wit and Wisdom of Forrest Gump
To each, his own ca-ca smells sweet. Do not be fooled by this.
-- Forrest Gump , Gumpisms: The Wit and Wisdom of Forrest Gump
wazza
+0 -0
I dunno, dude. My ca-ca smells pretty raw.
I dunno, dude. My ca-ca smells pretty raw.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
lucidz, i'm not sure this actually happened!
lucidz, i'm not sure this actually happened!
thegoblins
+0 -0
Um, the toilet in the staff-room in my local public library has one as well. I...I'm not surprised.
Um, the toilet in the staff-room in my local public library has one as well. I...I'm not surprised.
muh
+0 -0
while we're on this subject, condoms made out of goat intestines don't protect against AIDS.
And yes, apparently there's a market for guys who like to dress their wangs up in sheep intestines. I'm not making it up.
while we're on this subject, condoms made out of goat intestines don't protect against AIDS.
And yes, apparently there's a market for guys who like to dress their wangs up in sheep intestines. I'm not making it up.
octafish
+0 -0
I just picture Tevye dancing through assetbar singing "Tradition!"
I just picture Tevye dancing through assetbar singing "Tradition!"
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Might be dudes with latex allergies.
Might be dudes with latex allergies.
wazza
+0 -0
polyurethane condoms?
polyurethane condoms?
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
"what the hell...it's just a bunch of skateboard wheels taped together"
"what the hell...it's just a bunch of skateboard wheels taped together"
possums
+1 -0
https://hell yes
https://hell yes
lucidz
+0 -0
A comment left by lucidz was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by possums, gladi8orrex, RMJ12345, johnald)
A comment left by lucidz was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by possums, gladi8orrex, RMJ12345, johnald)
gladi8orrex
+18 -0
ya know u wrote all that shit but all i could read was "daaaaaad! LOOOK AT MEEEEEE! PAY ATTENTION!"
ya know u wrote all that shit but all i could read was "daaaaaad! LOOOK AT MEEEEEE! PAY ATTENTION!"
possums
+0 -0
more like "daaaad look at me I'm British"
more like "daaaad look at me I'm British"
troy_convers
+0 -0
Easy wit the 'British' thing, he ain't one of ours..!
Easy wit the 'British' thing, he ain't one of ours..!
davey-boy
+1 -1
You know what really climbs my prick...?
You know what really climbs my prick...?
granularsilica
+0 -0
WHY FIND OUT
WHY FIND OUT
miaou
+3 -0
crabs.
crabs.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
and it's miaou with the steal!!
and it's miaou with the steal!!
octafish
+0 -0
Hey miaou, what's the difference between crabs and lobsters?
Crabs walk sideways.
Shit. I think I've got lobsters then.
Hey miaou, what's the difference between crabs and lobsters?
Crabs walk sideways.
Shit. I think I've got lobsters then.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
All I could read was "maybe for me firty-fifth birfday, dad'll let me take 'er out on the road instead o up and down tha driveway, wot?"
All I could read was "maybe for me firty-fifth birfday, dad'll let me take 'er out on the road instead o up and down tha driveway, wot?"
troy_convers
+0 -0
ROFLMAOLAMF
ROFLMAOLAMF
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
turn off the lamf when you leave.
turn off the lamf when you leave.
wazza
+0 -0
OMGWTFBBQ
OMGWTFBBQ
comrade_tom
+0 -0
WWJDOIHOICD?
What Would Jesus DO If He Was Offered Illegal Cocaine Drugs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knbyKGta3hQ
WWJDOIHOICD?
What Would Jesus DO If He Was Offered Illegal Cocaine Drugs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knbyKGta3hQ
wazza
+0 -0
you missed a W there...
you missed a W there...
comrade_tom
+0 -0
yeah my bad, i just get so worked up about how everyone is on illegal cocaine drugs.
yeah my bad, i just get so worked up about how everyone is on illegal cocaine drugs.
thegoblins
+0 -0
You MEANT to do that, comrade tom!
You MEANT to do that, comrade tom!
wazza
+0 -0
no, dude, my bad... I just realised that that makes it
"What Would Jesus Do If He Offered Illegal Cocaine Drugs"
no, dude, my bad... I just realised that that makes it
"What Would Jesus Do If He Offered Illegal Cocaine Drugs"
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
which leads to the question of which drugs Illegal Cocaine does.
which leads to the question of which drugs Illegal Cocaine does.
machineelf
+1 -0
I trust Cornelius. I follow his instructions for proper omelet technique every time. Delicious.
I trust Cornelius. I follow his instructions for proper omelet technique every time. Delicious.
aperson
+6 -0
I think the important thing here is that this is a strip about a writer practicing his art, and a dumb upstart swanning in and thinking he can tell the writer how and what to writein the comments of some dang website .
Ya get me?
I think the important thing here is that this is a strip about a writer practicing his art, and a dumb upstart swanning in and thinking he can tell the writer how and what to write
Ya get me?
troy_convers
+0 -0
True dat.
True dat.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Never show the internet half a job.
Never show the internet half a job.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
this is the truer statement.
this is the truer statement.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Dang. Have...have we been schooled?
Dang. Have...have we been schooled?
granularsilica
+0 -0
Emergency male alert!
Rescue Team Uses Saw to Free Trapped Penis
Sparks fly when a trapped penis is freed from a dumbell ring
Emergency male alert!
Rescue Team Uses Saw to Free Trapped Penis
Sparks fly when a trapped penis is freed from a dumbell ring
wazza
+0 -0
a dumb-bell?
personally, I think that the correct response is leeches. They take the pressure down, you just slip that thing straight out.
Plus, he's never going to do it again unless he gets kicks out of getting his leech on, though this could also be said of the saw.
a dumb-bell?
personally, I think that the correct response is leeches. They take the pressure down, you just slip that thing straight out.
Plus, he's never going to do it again unless he gets kicks out of getting his leech on, though this could also be said of the saw.
mehighlow
+0 -0
The draft included only the lines for filling in various reasons to avoid the blacklight but then Connie decided it was for the better if he just went ahead and filled them himself.
The draft included only the lines for filling in various reasons to avoid the blacklight but then Connie decided it was for the better if he just went ahead and filled them himself.
wordsalad
+0 -0
"Is not dandruff! IS GLITTER, BABY!"
Vlad extracts it from his imported Ukie dark brown sweater and sprinkles her ass with it.
Get that commiebot some Bucket & Hinges!
"Is not dandruff! IS GLITTER, BABY!"
Vlad extracts it from his imported Ukie dark brown sweater and sprinkles her ass with it.
Get that commiebot some Bucket & Hinges!
mockereo
+0 -0
i see what you did with the robot shampoo brand. I get it.
i see what you did with the robot shampoo brand. I get it.
mintyhelminthes
+0 -0
did Cornelius just call Teodor a fool? suddenly Cornelius is an arrogant dick?
did Cornelius just call Teodor a fool? suddenly Cornelius is an arrogant dick?
re5urgam
+0 -0
So what do you think Monday's strip will be like?
So what do you think Monday's strip will be like?
re5urgam
+0 -0
Actually, do you think there will be a strip Monday?
Actually, do you think there will be a strip Monday?
neonfreon
+0 -0
i am thinking there will be a stripping scene in the strip on monday
i'm hoping it's extreme, ultra room kinda stuff. onstad owes it to us after all the more human than cat penis scenes he's subjected us to
i am thinking there will be a stripping scene in the strip on monday
i'm hoping it's extreme, ultra room kinda stuff. onstad owes it to us after all the more human than cat penis scenes he's subjected us to
thegoblins
+0 -0
I love penis scenes! That's my main scene!
I might need to hang up my penis hat though. It's pretty complicated. Penises have feelings, apparently.
I love penis scenes! That's my main scene!
I might need to hang up my penis hat though. It's pretty complicated. Penises have feelings, apparently.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
they plump when you cook 'em!
...what?
they plump when you cook 'em!
...what?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Penis hat?
Penis hat?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Ohhhhh, you mean Jimmy Hat.
As in "Do you know how to put the jimmy hat on your pee-pee?"
Ohhhhh, you mean Jimmy Hat.
As in "Do you know how to put the jimmy hat on your pee-pee?"
wazza
+0 -0
and then you move your other hand in a circle like this.
and then you move your other hand in a circle like this.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Dudes need to understand that bluntly digging their fingertips into the snazzy doesn't do much at all. Finesse, people, finesse.
Dudes need to understand that bluntly digging their fingertips into the snazzy doesn't do much at all. Finesse, people, finesse.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
all stroking the finger lengthwise straight up and down from the clit to the canal...all teasing and gentle at the top and firm strokes downward...
ahem. Excuse me for a while.
all stroking the finger lengthwise straight up and down from the clit to the canal...all teasing and gentle at the top and firm strokes downward...
ahem. Excuse me for a while.
stereo
+1 -0
All unsticking the layers of bologna, just peeling them off, licking out the mayo from between them, then folding them back to access the next layers.
All unsticking the layers of bologna, just peeling them off, licking out the mayo from between them, then folding them back to access the next layers.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Honestly, for some reason I much prefer it done through underpants. I'm weird that way.
Honestly, for some reason I much prefer it done through underpants. I'm weird that way.
wazza
+0 -0
lacy or flat cotton?
lacy or flat cotton?
thegoblins
+0 -0
Oh lord.
Well, I have nylon colorful ones for "special times." That's about as good as it gets.
Oh lord.
Well, I have nylon colorful ones for "special times." That's about as good as it gets.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
woo~
woo~
falseprophet
+0 -0
Oh lord.
We're jammin.
Oh lord.
We're jammin.
wazza
+0 -0
I was just thinking that the textures might add to the experience, which would explain why you prefer undies on to undies off.
I was just thinking that the textures might add to the experience, which would explain why you prefer undies on to undies off.
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
and why nylon is involved.
[IMGS OFF]
and why nylon is involved.
[IMGS OFF]
muh
+0 -0
I prefer fully clothed. with kinky outfits.
[IMGS OFF]
I prefer fully clothed. with kinky outfits.
[IMGS OFF]
thegoblins
+0 -0
Lame.
Lame.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
essentially.
what the hell, muh?
[/defending gobs]
essentially.
what the hell, muh?
[/defending gobs]
wazza
+0 -0
the inhaler of heated-up marijuana has stated that he wishes the cute kitten to engage in kinky snorkelling sex with the shaggy dog. Or that he wishes to do so himself, it's not entirely clear. It could go either way.
It could go either way.
the inhaler of heated-up marijuana has stated that he wishes the cute kitten to engage in kinky snorkelling sex with the shaggy dog. Or that he wishes to do so himself, it's not entirely clear. It could go either way.
It could go either way.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it's a super-cute picture of the dog, fur sure, but still.
it's a super-cute picture of the dog, fur sure, but still.
muh
+0 -0
what? I was not implying that either myself or the canine should fuck the kitten.
As for the kittens reaction to my comment expressing concern about her alcoholism up higher, I'm sorry goblins, I'm sorry, but what in heavens do you expect? That I should not care about your mental health? This is Assetbar, a place where we all have compassion for our fellow travelers.
what? I was not implying that either myself or the canine should fuck the kitten.
As for the kittens reaction to my comment expressing concern about her alcoholism up higher, I'm sorry goblins, I'm sorry, but what in heavens do you expect? That I should not care about your mental health? This is Assetbar, a place where we all have compassion for our fellow travelers.
wazza
+0 -0
I note you did not deny your own desires regarding the canine.
I note you did not deny your own desires regarding the canine.
thegoblins
+0 -0
I have, maybe, one drink a week. I'm more concerned about unprotected oral sex and passing at the moment.
I have, maybe, one drink a week. I'm more concerned about unprotected oral sex and passing at the moment.
muh
+0 -0
they say that is indicative of a healthy comfort level in a relationship when you are not embarrassed to pass in front of your partner. But yeah passing during oral sex might be taking 'comfortable' to an extreme. But hey, who am I to judge I guess I don't know you as well as I thought I did, had you pegged for an alcolololol... olol.
they say that is indicative of a healthy comfort level in a relationship when you are not embarrassed to pass in front of your partner. But yeah passing during oral sex might be taking 'comfortable' to an extreme. But hey, who am I to judge I guess I don't know you as well as I thought I did, had you pegged for an alcolololol... olol.
wazza
+0 -0
do you think that it is rad not to be able to spell alcoholism, muh?
do you think that it is rad not to be able to spell alcoholism, muh?
bluemoon72
+0 -0
I would applaud you, but I'm sure you've already had the clap.
I would applaud you, but I'm sure you've already had the clap.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
lady's got chops!
(new hit single by Jacksonville's newest r-n-b sensation, sWINeeefloo)
lady's got chops!
(new hit single by Jacksonville's newest r-n-b sensation, sWINeeefloo)
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Thank you. You raise me up like a draFTWind.
Thank you. You raise me up like a draFTWind.
thegoblins
+0 -0
I'm waiting for my applause. The audience is getting testy.
I'm waiting for my applause. The audience is getting testy.
wazza
+0 -0
does that mean you want us to give you the clap?
does that mean you want us to give you the clap?
bluemoon72
+0 -0
[[golf clap for the goblins]] I honor you with the softest and most reverent of applause.
[[golf clap for the goblins]] I honor you with the softest and most reverent of applause.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
BURRRRNNNN.
BURRRRNNNN.
thegoblins
+0 -0
That it does.
That it does.
wazza
+0 -0
I will go out now, and get the clap, so that I may give it to you.
this is a special thing I would not do for just anyone you understand
I will go out now, and get the clap, so that I may give it to you.
this is a special thing I would not do for just anyone you understand
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
You must redo this in the style of English Romanticism, or ironic Byronic pentameter, whichever expires first.
You must redo this in the style of English Romanticism, or ironic Byronic pentameter, whichever expires first.
thegoblins
+0 -0
I would prefer to stay clap-free.
I would prefer to stay clap-free.
wazza
+0 -0
but you just said you wanted us to give you the clap.
MAKE UP YOUR MIND!
but you just said you wanted us to give you the clap.
MAKE UP YOUR MIND!
neonfreon
+0 -0
the feeling my penis gets when it's around you is indescribable
the feeling my penis gets when it's around you is indescribable
thegoblins
+0 -0
Your penis never been round me.
Your penis never been round me.
neonfreon
+0 -0
how else could it be indescribable
how else could it be indescribable
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i'd say 'he's got you there' but he doesn't.
i'd say 'he's got you there' but he doesn't.
muh
+1 -0
AUGUST 24--A search warrant affidavit sworn by a Los Angeles detective provides a detailed account of the police probe into the death of Propofol, whose doctor told cops that he had been treating the prescription drug's insomnia by intravenously administering the powerful pop star Michael Jackson in the weeks before Propofol's June 25 death. The affidavit of LAPD Detective Orlando Martinez was included in a search warrant application filed last month in Houston, Texas, where Dr. Conrad Murray maintained an office and a storage unit. A copy of Martinez's affidavit, prepared last month, can be found below. Murray, reportedly the subject of a criminal probe stemming from Propofol's death, told investigators that he "felt that Propofol may have been forming an addiction to" Michael Jackson, and tried to "wean Propofol off the pop singer." The affidavit notes that Propofol "was very familiar with the pop star and referred to it as his 'milk.'" The affidavit also quotes an L.A. coroner's official saying that preliminary toxicology results showed that " Propofol's cause of death was due to lethal levels of Michael Jackson." The coroner has classified Propofol's death a homicide, according to a law enforcement source cited today by the Associated Press, which reported that the ruling makes it "more likely" that criminal charges will be filed against the 56-year-old Murray. (17 pages)
AUGUST 24--A search warrant affidavit sworn by a Los Angeles detective provides a detailed account of the police probe into the death of Propofol, whose doctor told cops that he had been treating the prescription drug's insomnia by intravenously administering the powerful pop star Michael Jackson in the weeks before Propofol's June 25 death. The affidavit of LAPD Detective Orlando Martinez was included in a search warrant application filed last month in Houston, Texas, where Dr. Conrad Murray maintained an office and a storage unit. A copy of Martinez's affidavit, prepared last month, can be found below. Murray, reportedly the subject of a criminal probe stemming from Propofol's death, told investigators that he "felt that Propofol may have been forming an addiction to" Michael Jackson, and tried to "wean Propofol off the pop singer." The affidavit notes that Propofol "was very familiar with the pop star and referred to it as his 'milk.'" The affidavit also quotes an L.A. coroner's official saying that preliminary toxicology results showed that " Propofol's cause of death was due to lethal levels of Michael Jackson." The coroner has classified Propofol's death a homicide, according to a law enforcement source cited today by the Associated Press, which reported that the ruling makes it "more likely" that criminal charges will be filed against the 56-year-old Murray. (17 pages)
featurelessvoid
+0 -0
I see what you did there.
I see what you did there.
randyleepublic
+0 -0
Got my pant'z on, OK?
Got my pant'z on, OK?
bluemoon72
+0 -0
But are YA ROXX off?
But are YA ROXX off?
puguglypress
+0 -0
at the... STRIP CLUBBBUBUBBB!! $$$#
at the... STRIP CLUBBBUBUBBB!! $$$#
puguglypress
+0 -0
(https://hellyes)
(https://hellyes)
lolsworth
+0 -0
There is a strong possibility that this will be the greatest book ever written.
There is a strong possibility that this will be the greatest book ever written.
johnald
+0 -0
font at the top of panel one looked enough like comic sans to make me doubletake
font at the top of panel one looked enough like comic sans to make me doubletake
featurelessvoid
+1 -0
I went to the book signing thing in Seattle this evening, and Chris Onstad drew a Cornelius Bear in my Worst Song, Played on Ugliest Guitar book.
That, Philippe, is the happiest thing.
I went to the book signing thing in Seattle this evening, and Chris Onstad drew a Cornelius Bear in my Worst Song, Played on Ugliest Guitar book.
That, Philippe, is the happiest thing.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
jawesome.
jawesome.
deus
+0 -0
Bears desing is just as good as the cinematography to Twilight.
Bears desing is just as good as the cinematography to Twilight.
wazza
+0 -0
his writing is about ten times better than the book, though
(I've never read it. An acquaintance of mine took one for the team, though.)
his writing is about ten times better than the book, though
(I've never read it. An acquaintance of mine took one for the team, though.)
brokeaccount
+0 -0
I refuse to read anything that's stocked in a section called "supernatural romance".
I refuse to read anything that's stocked in a section called "supernatural romance".
deus
+0 -0
For me, "Supernatural romance" means werewolves raping you.
For me, "Supernatural romance" means werewolves raping you.
wazza
+0 -0
that is not romance
that is not romance
deus
+0 -0
no its supernatural romance.
no its supernatural romance.
azairborne
+0 -0
You poor pathetic heathen; waiting like vultures for his next piece of sustenance. I curse you all!
You poor pathetic heathen; waiting like vultures for his next piece of sustenance. I curse you all!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
why is O so good at formatting so bad?
why is O so good at formatting so bad?
bluemoon72
+0 -0
It hurts so good to see formatting so bad.
It hurts so good to see formatting so bad.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
also: i am cooking chicken tonight. i want to do it oven-fried, but i don't have any foil to line my small 8" circular pan. any culinary geniuses able to help me out?
also: i am cooking chicken tonight. i want to do it oven-fried, but i don't have any foil to line my small 8" circular pan. any culinary geniuses able to help me out?
bluemoon72
+0 -0
Hmm...a medium coating of olive oil or peanut oil in the pan might work. It could both lubricate and add flavor and crispness.
Hmm...a medium coating of olive oil or peanut oil in the pan might work. It could both lubricate and add flavor and crispness.
thegoblins
+0 -0
THATS WHAT SHE
ummm
THATS WHAT SHE
ummm
granularsilica
+0 -0
Thanks for saving me from my joke.
Thanks for saving me from my joke.
neonfreon
+0 -0
i cooked sweet and sour rabbit tonight, with fresh rabbit
i cooked sweet and sour rabbit tonight, with fresh rabbit
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Is this what we're doing, now? I reheated the last of my homemade bean chili and ate it with sweet potato wedges and a liberal topping of cheese. Madly comforting.
Is this what we're doing, now? I reheated the last of my homemade bean chili and ate it with sweet potato wedges and a liberal topping of cheese. Madly comforting.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
OH HELL YES.
OH HELL YES.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
That "OH HELL YES" was for the rabbit, but applies equally to the cheese-topped bean chili with sweet potato wedges. Yum.
That "OH HELL YES" was for the rabbit, but applies equally to the cheese-topped bean chili with sweet potato wedges. Yum.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Kids: always serve your rabbit with rabbit.
Kids: always serve your rabbit with rabbit.
granularsilica
+0 -0
I made beef stew. Don't worry about the circular pan, if you soak it long enough, any burned stuff will come off. (That's also what she said.)
I made beef stew. Don't worry about the circular pan, if you soak it long enough, any burned stuff will come off. (That's also what she said.)
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
my twin gave me her secret pan fried chicken recipe. you cannot have it. nein. the only issue was converting the '7' on her stove to my '5'. after the fire alarms went off three separate times, i cooked one heck of a dinner.
my twin gave me her secret pan fried chicken recipe. you cannot have it. nein. the only issue was converting the '7' on her stove to my '5'. after the fire alarms went off three separate times, i cooked one heck of a dinner.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
And how did the 8" circular pan fare?
And how did the 8" circular pan fare?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
iiiiiiiiiiiit didn't. i used some other piece of cookery.
tonight, i found that you should find out what temperature is what before you set sail for the Cook Ilesand that it is difficult to fry things steven evenly.
iiiiiiiiiiiit didn't. i used some other piece of cookery.
tonight, i found that you should find out what temperature is what before you set sail for the Cook Ilesand that it is difficult to fry things steven evenly.
bluemoon72
+0 -0
You grow wise, grasshopper.
You grow wise, grasshopper.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
mmmmm. 3-alarm chicken, hold the ding-dongs.
mmmmm. 3-alarm chicken, hold the ding-dongs.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
up yours, customer!
up yours, customer!
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Oooh la-la!
Oooh la-la!
vanillaskittles
+0 -0
Is Lef' Mo-Higgins really the coolest name Cornelius can come up with?
Is Lef' Mo-Higgins really the coolest name Cornelius can come up with?
muh
+0 -0
I've had a number of craig's list transactions as of late that resulted in unproductive bouts of phone tag. We agree on a time for me to come pick up whatever I'm buying, and then they e-mail me "call me." I call them. they're not home. they call me back, and I'm not home. By the time we get ahold of each other, days may have passed.
Finally we talk on the phone, and the person insists on giving me turn-by-turn instructions. I've got a GPS dude. I don't understand instructions anyway. That's why I have a GPS. But that doesn't stop them.
So I'm trying something new. Now, in my first e-mail, the first thing I say to any craig's list seller is: "I don't have a phone."
I've had a number of craig's list transactions as of late that resulted in unproductive bouts of phone tag. We agree on a time for me to come pick up whatever I'm buying, and then they e-mail me "call me." I call them. they're not home. they call me back, and I'm not home. By the time we get ahold of each other, days may have passed.
Finally we talk on the phone, and the person insists on giving me turn-by-turn instructions. I've got a GPS dude. I don't understand instructions anyway. That's why I have a GPS. But that doesn't stop them.
So I'm trying something new. Now, in my first e-mail, the first thing I say to any craig's list seller is: "I don't have a phone."
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Dear California:
[IMGS OFF]
Dear California:
[IMGS OFF]
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
the dancing guy in panel one is reminiscent of MC Front.
the dancing guy in panel one is reminiscent of MC Front.
genequagmire
+0 -0
I have Kumhos, and now I have a complex about knowing it.
I have Kumhos, and now I have a complex about knowing it.
terriblerobot
+0 -1
Man you think that's bad? Not only do I know what kind of tires are on my car, I do all my repairs myself . Seriously, fuck Teodor and his uppity shit.
Man you think that's bad? Not only do I know what kind of tires are on my car, I do all my repairs myself . Seriously, fuck Teodor and his uppity shit.
terriblerobot
+0 -1
No really, Teodor is, and has always been my least favorite character. There is something about him that makes me want to cause him harm.
No really, Teodor is, and has always been my least favorite character. There is something about him that makes me want to cause him harm.
duperando
+0 -0
Oh man, that first panel killed me. My roomie thinks I'm insane from all my chuckling, but then again, she's over there playin' World of Warcraft, so she is one to talk.
Oh man, that first panel killed me. My roomie thinks I'm insane from all my chuckling, but then again, she's over there playin' World of Warcraft, so she is one to talk.
"sausage wallet".
"spam purse"
The Flange
"Money-maker"
"Hot Pocket"
The box where children go to die.
No man you got it backwards.
[IMGS OFF]
LET'S DO THE TIME-WARP AGAAAIN~
AND NOW THE PELVIC THRUSTS
My favorite to date is "Wizard's Sleeve," I think.
Damn, that's my favourite!
midge
moot
pronounced like soot.
these... pelvic thrusts... what effect do they have on your mental wellbeing?
I've heard tales that they may really drive you insane.
No word of a lie: I'm going to see the Rocky Horror tonight. I'm psyched.
is it part of a science fiction double feature?
I can't not steal a line so perfect.
with 'The Room'
YOU ARE TEEEEARING ME APART, FARQUSSUS.
I...fuck, I want to go.
that's part of the mechanism (labia, if my 8th grade health class learnings remain correctly with me 20 years later)
I wish I could chubby this more man
What? I never thought anyone would wish to chubby a morman.
HUNGRY FOR SAINTHOOD? RING THE MOR-MAN!
Thocrates? Arithtotle? Plato? MORONTH!
I AIN'T GOT MUCH FOR COMMA'S, OKAY, OKAY. WHY YOU GOTTA CALL ME OUT IN THE PUBLIC INTERNET.
Awww, that's because your commas flip themselves upside down and show up as inappropriate apostrophes :(.
"Middle Passage"
(if you like your euphemisms to have a depressing historical/socioeconomic editorial slant)
Niflheimr
fried calamari cock ring
Fried calamari may be better than
sandalwood.
Oh fuck me for being fancy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qb-Kh1oJSGE
"Hey sugar, want to have see how salty the trail of tears really was?"
Just don' be callin' it no continental divide, 'less you like gettin' slapped.
"Panama Canal"
I support teaching kids history, through euphemisms for the nether regions.
"Manifest Destiny"
Keep spreading the love.
the Cuban Missile Crisis?
or are we just doing female genitalia?
Mr Gorbachev! Tear down this Uterine wall!
chubby for the OPPOSITE of avatar/comment synergy!
You should know that my legs instinctively crossed when I read that.
The iron curtain.
Does it match the drapes?
((wait... shit. does it match the CARPET))
No.
... Mariana Trench?
(A section of sea-floor overutilised in my commentary.)
Who doesn't?
No, please, why, I hate it
"Meat Blossom"
I prefer the fairly descriptive blues term "Jellyroll"
The Crunge
Velvet sausage wallet.
Vagina.
A comment left by ouroboros was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Scorpio_nadir, FablesandBlues, cpnglxynchos)
I HATE IT
ME TOO.
the vertical smile
awwww
the vertical frown
I HATE IT
CLITS
LOVE THEM
Moist.
Ahhhh the old days... errr... old memes.
Does that include these knives?
These knives that I... boned?
dude, you can bone knives if you want. You can even do it with bone knives. Just don't expect me to join in.
Bone-handled knives? ... oh, nevermind.
Boning knives!
https://www.ehow.com/how_4423028_make-bone-knife.html
bone knives?
Old memes, what news from the north?
The Saxons continue to sack, while the Spanish have taken to their galleons?
The French are Galling and the Russians are coming, the Russians are oming
coming
:(
Venetian doublet.
Industrial Pigeon Crusher
A comment left by rayonatoilet was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by expellens, Deusoma, laxcatzach, cpnglxynchos, camidumas)
"She-penis" is definitely the clitoris.
Meat Thermometer
I would say the glans starts to form differently in the MALE rather than the other way round. Anatomy is so wrongfully phallocentric.
except that in the male the Glans is directly functional, whereas in females it is sort of there mainly to spread happiness and sunshine.
But the external genitalia of the fetus initially most closely resembles the external genitalia of the female. In the absence of certain events in development, a genetic male will externally resemble a female because certain changes DID NOT occur. Female is the default, dude.
woah... you're blowing my mind.
it makes sense though. that 'seam' of skin that runs between the asshole and the balls... it basically looks like a cunt that was hastily sutured shut.
FANTASTIC OBSERVATION! It's known as the "perinium" or "taint" :)
That is not a fantastic observation.
Really, why look there?
yeah, it actually continues up the ball sack a good distance, I forgot to mention, in case you've never checked.
I call it the Love Line.
that's like saying that females are just, like, off the lot, while males are fully pimped out.
No, it's not. I'm just finding a quibble with the fact that female structures are always presented as anatomically analogous to male structures. It should be the other way 'round.
We're really only talking about one tiny bit of erectile tissue here, out of all the amazing female stuff that has NO male analogy (uterus, cervix, vagina). It's best to not compare. Same for breasts, useless as tits on a bull, as the old saying goes.
IT's not best to not compare.
There's a lot about human sexuality that's weird. Why exactly do males have to achieve erection, thus feeling pleasure, to fertilize the female? Why does the female's pleasure play a role at all? Why do humans get rutty all the time, instead of during specific estrus periods?
It's all to fool us into having rug rats.
negative... a recent advance in evolutionary theory focuses on... cooking. The cooking of food gives the individual human a significant evolutionary advantage over other animals in it's environment, be these animals human or other species. Cooked has essentially the same amount of calories as uncooked food, however, the digestion of cooked food requires much less energy, thereby leaving the consumer of cooked food much more energy for survival.
Much evolutionary and cultural specialization of the sexes previously thought to be for reproductive advantage such as for raising kids in fact can be argued to be for the purpose of cooking. Cooking takes a lot of time and energy. I guess it's difficult to be good at both cooking and hunting and gathering. This may explain more than anything why the female needs to get some pleasure out of the sexual relationship.
After hunting and gathering, I suppose cooking comes into play. Control of fire then being necessary. "What's cookin', good lookin'" is not far behind.
A comment left by expellens was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Jetbunny, howl, Comrade_Tom, kharbevnor)
Why do Genitals got to do a thing?
Avatar/post chubworthiness.
that's not just human, that's mammal
evolutionary survival technique
If I remember my biology correctly, that's because the X chromosome contains all the information on how to grow a human female from scratch, while the Y chromosome (which is much smaller) is mostly just a list of instructions on how to turn a girl into a boy.
You are correct. We are all by default female. If the Y chromosome doesn't kick in, we become girls (sterile girls, but girls nonetheless).
Just ask Jamie-Lee Curtis (male genotype, female phenotype).
Naw, Jamie-Lee Curtis has three X chromosomes.
Let's keep going with Celebrity Genetic Trivia for 400, Alex.
So THAT'S why they chose her for that stupid XXX movie, I always wonder how they got her to shave her head
All this talk reminds me about a gender studies class I took (briefly) in college. One "exercise" required us to split into groups and come up with as many euphemisms/nicknames/slang terms for male and female genitalia as possible. Then, each group had to read those terms aloud. Sounds like silly fun time, right?
No. All these examples clearly illustrate men's need to dominate women by taking all these positive terms for themselves and creating completely derogatory and debasing terms for the lady parts.
We also learned that feminine hygiene product advertisements are also tools of the man to keep the woman embarrassed and ashamed of her own body in order to prevent her from achieving things in life. Several other various groups were slandered without reasonable looks at the quotes/examples being used to condemn them with the label of "woman-hating assholes".
Good times.
DY-no- miiiiite!
Come for the comics. Stay for the comparative physiology.
GY-no-miiiiiight!
No, I'm not being all gender/ women's studies. When I'm being all gender/ women's studies I'll tell you. I'm just being biological now. If you don't believe me, look up androgen insufficiency syndrome.
Is that the medical term for the condition in which someone is quite simply not man enough?
I didn't mean to imply you were. The lengthy list of terms/phrases for genitalia is what really dredged up the memories. I just botched where I interjected the comment. Apologies if offense was taken.
And please don't be all gender/women's studies ever.
I'm curious what the women wanted to call male genitalia. Or female genitalia, for that matter. Please elaborate?
rape-rod.
Dude: Patriarch's Hammer of Unwarranted Power.
Lady: God's Mouth.
She returneth! With unrestrained mirthing powers!
no man can hold my mirth back, NO MAN!
...Professor?
The groups were comprised of male & female. Most everyone seemed to be having fun with the ridiculous idea except for a few people whose moral sensibilities were offended. Understandable.
Of course, it shifted into UNCOMFORTABLE mode for everyone when this batshit nutjob launched into her conspiracy theories about men collaborating to boost their own self worth while lowering that of women with the Genital Thesaurus.
I wish I could say I'm using hyperbole to make light of the situation. This woman is certifiable.
Side note: she is no longer at the university I attended.
Was this the prof or one of the other students?
Oops. Might be helpful to mix in something other than a pronoun when I'm talking about someone, eh? This was the professor.
I've only encountered one other professor/teacher that made the entire class uncomfortable on a similar level.
My professional writing instructor was part Native American, and just before Thanksgiving break, he handed out a paper that told the "true story of Thanksgiving".
If you haven't seen/heard it before, this is similar to the printout he gave us. After giving everyone a moment to read it, he encouraged us to "enjoy" our holiday.
Granted, he had a legitimate beef.
Dude, there's a whole exhibit in Plymouth, MA where Native Americans yell at you for being there.
But doesn't she sort of have a point? There doesn't need to be a conspiracy for the Genital Thesaurus to demonstrate how our culture views men and women differently. I definitely see a tendency (especially in more outlandish/jocular terms) for people to use powerful or violent imagery like rockets or guns or whatever to talk about dicks, whereas women get more passive stuff, like comparisons to small furry animals, or warm clothing like "muff" or "mitten."
There's no conspiracy, clearly, but that doesn't mean the pattern doesn't exist. It seems likely that there's a process of natural selection going on, where words which seem appropriate (because they line up well with our ideas about gender roles) catch on and are perpetuated, whereas terms like "pigeon crusher" are less likely to get a foothold. Consider, for instance, the element of humor: A lot of slang like this is perpetuated because, on some level, the comparison is funny, and one reason they're funny is because they confirm our biases about men and women.
but do they seem appropriate because they conform to our biases, or do they conform to our biases because they're appropriate?
it is pretty warm and squishy in there...
I hope you find it warm and squishy in your feline of patriarchy
I think the real problem here is looking for deeper meaning in a set of slang terms/phrases that most of which were probably created by some drunken frat boys in between rounds of spanking each other on the ass.
Really...after hearing so many nicknames listed for both sets, I was a bit revolted. Neither group sounds particularly appealing when viewed through that lens.
Furthermore, guns, rockets, etc. are all pretty phallic-shaped. Mittens, wallets, etc. do typically get things put inside them. Regardless of the connotations people associate with those, I have to assume a larger part of the reason they stick is, well, they're fairly reasonable comparisons when dumbed down to the most basic level...where I feel they're created.
Panty hamster.
Front backside.
Whisker biscuit.
Big Muff Pi
e......wait, that's a guitar pedal...
It's a Bass Pedal. Makes the Bass Sounds like it's farting. But it's kinda rad.
I am still reatively sure that this is a false concept.
That a bass making a farting noise could be cool? I have heard many example to the contrary.
bisker whiscuit (i wish i had done this one first)
A very dangerous skateboarding trick.
I did a gnarly 180 front backside off the library stairs.
god damn it too slow
hanty Pamster
goddamn changing order of assetbar replies that i don't understand yet...
There's an app for that, Assetbarrista. It put's little arrow thingees when a reply is separated from a post. Otherwise, once there is a chain of about six or seven replies, they just stack up against the right side and you can't tell shit.
A comment left by rascaldom was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by hateandwar, Ramsus, theyang)
Turn around so i can slap you in the face
Then turn around again so he can KICK YOUR ASS!!
Poorly-folded pita.
The Gate of Heaven.
Beef curtains.
Ham sandwich.
you spent two days thinking that one up, didn't you?