equinn2006
+39 -2
For the first "fact" I like to hear the voice of Dwight from The Office, slowly becoming more and more deranged until the screaming and fist-shaking.
For the first "fact" I like to hear the voice of Dwight from The Office, slowly becoming more and more deranged until the screaming and fist-shaking.
pigs
+2 -2
You deserve a chubby for the office reference.
You deserve a chubby for the office reference.
singtralala
+0 -0
A comment left by singtralala was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Vondicus, Ariamaki, Boyd, ASaltySalute4, TheGreatestCape)
A comment left by singtralala was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Vondicus, Ariamaki, Boyd, ASaltySalute4, TheGreatestCape)
the_stoned_one
+2 -0
Dwight from the office would probably be the best casting for Nice Pete if anyone was deranged enough to try and make a live version of Achewood.
Dwight from the office would probably be the best casting for Nice Pete if anyone was deranged enough to try and make a live version of Achewood.
mangtastic
+0 -0
They have the same head-shape! It could work.
They have the same head-shape! It could work.
saint
+13 -0
That's what she said?
That's what she said?
anzio
+0 -0
Man, making a live action version would be awful. I'd rather just pay Chris 100 grand to stop doing whatever he's doing and co-direct an animated movie with a director of competence... maybe Terry Gilliam?
Man, making a live action version would be awful. I'd rather just pay Chris 100 grand to stop doing whatever he's doing and co-direct an animated movie with a director of competence... maybe Terry Gilliam?
tekende
+0 -0
Chris Onstad and Terry Gilliam working together on a project? It would never, ever, ever be finished.
Chris Onstad and Terry Gilliam working together on a project? It would never, ever, ever be finished.
anzio
+0 -0
This is true.
This is true.
gournal
+0 -0
"Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I came to work with my spud gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at sixty pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged?? "
"Security in this office park is a joke. Last year, I came to work with my spud gun in a duffel bag. I sat at my desk all day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at sixty pounds per square inch. Can you imagine if I was deranged?? "
woof
+5 -1
alt text: Nothing a good voice coach and a lobotomy couldn't help with
alt text: Nothing a good voice coach and a lobotomy couldn't help with
djwhiterabbit
+60 -1
nice pete has since been declared the winner of a basketball game against the man on the other end of the phone.
nice pete has since been declared the winner of a basketball game against the man on the other end of the phone.
spinynorman
+127 -1
God made psychopaths so we would be polite to one another. That dude you cut off on the highway could follow you home. The last thing you would see would be him straddling you with handfuls of your intestines, weeping and asking you, "What are these? Were you trying to fool me? What are these?"
If only you had been considerate.
God made psychopaths so we would be polite to one another. That dude you cut off on the highway could follow you home. The last thing you would see would be him straddling you with handfuls of your intestines, weeping and asking you, "What are these? Were you trying to fool me? What are these?"
If only you had been considerate.
nigelchaos
+1 -1
Wow...
A winner is you.
Wow...
A winner is you.
spinynorman
+1 -1
Haha, thanks, it's even creepier with the new avatar
Haha, thanks, it's even creepier with the new avatar
terebikun
+4 -0
Actually it's just more logical. If you had an avatar of, say, Encyclopedia Brown looking pedantic, that might be creepier.
Actually it's just more logical. If you had an avatar of, say, Encyclopedia Brown looking pedantic, that might be creepier.
spinynorman
+20 -0
Man, when doesn't Encyclopedia Brown look Pedantic? Fuck that guy.
Man, when doesn't Encyclopedia Brown look Pedantic? Fuck that guy.
terebikun
+1 -0
True. Maybe he's drooling a little at the mouth too. I always imagine him as such a mouth-breather. Honestly, where is he going to go in life? He's lived out his 15 minutes of fame back in middle school or whenever those books happened. Years down the road he'll be the barista wishing he hadn't dropped out of detective school and harassing people who are trying to finish their crossword puzzle without help.
True. Maybe he's drooling a little at the mouth too. I always imagine him as such a mouth-breather. Honestly, where is he going to go in life? He's lived out his 15 minutes of fame back in middle school or whenever those books happened. Years down the road he'll be the barista wishing he hadn't dropped out of detective school and harassing people who are trying to finish their crossword puzzle without help.
nigelchaos
+2 -0
Where's Dr. Manflesh with an Encyclopedia Brown fanfic when you need him?!
Where's Dr. Manflesh with an Encyclopedia Brown fanfic when you need him?!
boredom_man
+8 -0
I'm pretty sure William H. Macy played him in Magnolia
I'm pretty sure William H. Macy played him in Magnolia
terebikun
+2 -0
This is the best possible answer
This is the best possible answer
relaxing
+3 -0
Who are you, Bugs Meany?
Who are you, Bugs Meany?
johnnybaverage
+0 -0
Fuck you, Encyclopedia Brown! SCREW you!
Fuck you, Encyclopedia Brown! SCREW you!
dissembly
+0 -0
It helps that I imagine everything you say in Stephen Fry's voice and cadence.
It helps that I imagine everything you say in Stephen Fry's voice and cadence.
soticoto
+0 -0
You get insane chubbies for being gory.
I get insane lames for being gory (and other things).
... It probably falls halfway between avatar and reputation, but it still strikes me as unjust.
Not a complaint about your little story, mind you. I enjoyed that. ^_^
You get insane chubbies for being gory.
I get insane lames for being gory (and other things).
... It probably falls halfway between avatar and reputation, but it still strikes me as unjust.
Not a complaint about your little story, mind you. I enjoyed that. ^_^
fuzzyrobot
+0 -0
Oh my God I lamed your post instead of chubbying it oh my God what did I doooo
Oh my God I lamed your post instead of chubbying it oh my God what did I doooo
nonorganon
+1 -1
I can't really imagine the effects that would have on the voice.
I can't really imagine the effects that would have on the voice.
fuckyoufriday
+26 -0
Epilogue: the man on the other line was mysteriously kidnapped the next day. His family has received one cubic inch of his body in the mail once a week for the past 2 1/2 years.
Epilogue: the man on the other line was mysteriously kidnapped the next day. His family has received one cubic inch of his body in the mail once a week for the past 2 1/2 years.
epicurus
+0 -0
Does this work out to a very large person? Let's Sciencize it, yeah!
Does this work out to a very large person? Let's Sciencize it, yeah!
scraggg
+10 -0
Well, that's about 130 cubic inches (52 weeks in a year, 52 52 26 = 130), or, roughly 9 cups of person.
Well, that's about 130 cubic inches (52 weeks in a year, 52 52 26 = 130), or, roughly 9 cups of person.
tekende
+12 -0
Of course, the recommended serving size of person is about one-and-a-half cups.
Of course, the recommended serving size of person is about one-and-a-half cups.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Per person?
Per person?
direhaggis
+1 -0
I praise your avatar being the Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas to Heaven album cover. Chubbied.
I praise your avatar being the Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas to Heaven album cover. Chubbied.
ford
+0 -0
this does not mean he's a large person, but I'm sure pete is far from finished.
this does not mean he's a large person, but I'm sure pete is far from finished.
riazm
+8 -0
Nice Pete is actually calling this number at 6am.
Nice Pete is actually calling this number at 6am.
bourbonsamurai
+4 -0
This one feels like Onstad came up with the last line and then spent awhile thinking how the heck he could work it into a script.
This one feels like Onstad came up with the last line and then spent awhile thinking how the heck he could work it into a script.
spinynorman
+13 -1
It probably wasn't that hard - with a lot of these characters, especially Pete, they're sort of like broken fire hydrants spraying awesome non-sequiturs all over the damn place.
Laughing, giggling children dancing in the non-sequiturs is both optional and bizarre.
It probably wasn't that hard - with a lot of these characters, especially Pete, they're sort of like broken fire hydrants spraying awesome non-sequiturs all over the damn place.
Laughing, giggling children dancing in the non-sequiturs is both optional and bizarre.
aelindil
+0 -0
Your similes and metaphors are the best similes and metaphors.
Your similes and metaphors are the best similes and metaphors.
tekende
+2 -1
He's like a shark. He's just gotta...keep making metaphors.
He's like a shark. He's just gotta...keep making metaphors.
spicyponyhead
+0 -0
"Like a shark" is a simile.
"Like a shark" is a simile.
tekende
+0 -0
My post was a Penny Arcade reference.
My post was a Penny Arcade reference.
spicyponyhead
+1 -0
Then please lame me, for I cannot lame myself (as I just found out when I tried to do so)!
Then please lame me, for I cannot lame myself (as I just found out when I tried to do so)!
tekende
+0 -0
I have no lames, but I would not lame you for that anyway.
I have no lames, but I would not lame you for that anyway.
spicyponyhead
+1 -0
HUUUUUUUUUUGS!
HUUUUUUUUUUGS!
waldo913
+0 -0
Is that the Fist of Conviction that I see Nice Pete sporting there in p7? I think it is...
Is that the Fist of Conviction that I see Nice Pete sporting there in p7? I think it is...
professorhazard
+0 -0
Man, that's crazy talk! That text ain't big enough to be analagous to Sam Kinison's method of speech!
Sheesh, the imagination on this kid!
Man, that's crazy talk! That text ain't big enough to be analagous to Sam Kinison's method of speech!
Sheesh, the imagination on this kid!
professorhazard
+5 -0
It starts out innocuously enough. You're commenting. You're having a good time. And then you realize that you've misspelled "analogous"... and that there's no way to ever set that right.
It starts out innocuously enough. You're commenting. You're having a good time. And then you realize that you've misspelled "analogous"... and that there's no way to ever set that right.
direhaggis
+3 -0
I spelled grammar as grammer once. A bald old man ripped me a new one. The little red line underneath words was supposed to tell me. I guess the beer was louder.
I spelled grammar as grammer once. A bald old man ripped me a new one. The little red line underneath words was supposed to tell me. I guess the beer was louder.
mattylite
+0 -0
I lost a spelling bee that way. I felt really stupid afterwards. We should start a club.
I lost a spelling bee that way. I felt really stupid afterwards. We should start a club.
hateandwar
+1 -0
I know I've lost more than one spelling bee because my beer was too loud. I've since switched to whiskey in a flask.
I know I've lost more than one spelling bee because my beer was too loud. I've since switched to whiskey in a flask.
xiaomimi
+19 -0
Wednesday Blogs
Molly: Happy Holidays!
Wednesday Blogs
Molly: Happy Holidays!
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Pat's lawyer called Siccio and Molly's employer called Del Vecchio going insane in very similar ways is sort of disquieting for me in a way that I can only really compare to certain Lovecraft short stories.
Pat's lawyer called Siccio and Molly's employer called Del Vecchio going insane in very similar ways is sort of disquieting for me in a way that I can only really compare to certain Lovecraft short stories.
stewieisgod13
+0 -0
No! This isn't Tim from accounting!
So great.
No! This isn't Tim from accounting!
So great.
tekende
+1 -0
Every time I read this strip something different in it makes me laugh. Today it was "huge rails of coke."
Every time I read this strip something different in it makes me laugh. Today it was "huge rails of coke."
aliiis
+0 -0
Yeah, I love strips like that. I think in this one the first time I was all about Pete's hand gestures in the second row. Today it's more his eyes-closed 'ahem' in panel 4. Thank you for being the most recent comment and making me see this wonderful strip and giggle again.
Yeah, I love strips like that. I think in this one the first time I was all about Pete's hand gestures in the second row. Today it's more his eyes-closed 'ahem' in panel 4. Thank you for being the most recent comment and making me see this wonderful strip and giggle again.
mtrott
+0 -0
Fact: a good voice coach and a lobotomy are really all one needs to succeed in life
Fact: a good voice coach and a lobotomy are really all one needs to succeed in life
scifigrl47
+0 -0
When he holds a phone to where a human ear should be, his cat ears look more like devil horns than it just and right. but holy heavens, cat's got good hearing if he can hear that phone through his SKULL.
When he holds a phone to where a human ear should be, his cat ears look more like devil horns than it just and right. but holy heavens, cat's got good hearing if he can hear that phone through his SKULL.
excusemesenator
+0 -0
I'm sorry but it is such a trope to have a character talk about insert-name-here "from accounting"
I'm sorry but it is such a trope to have a character talk about insert-name-here "from accounting"
Or, as Nice Pete likes to call them, "Tuesdays".