teabag_mel
+5 -0
Is Lyleland's flag supposed to represent a raised middle finger?
Is Lyleland's flag supposed to represent a raised middle finger?
possums
+8 -0
It might be a game of blackjack.
And that card might be THE ACE OF SPAAAAADES
It might be a game of blackjack.
And that card might be THE ACE OF SPAAAAADES
drskradley
+5 -0
I originally took it as a stylised Black Flag (literally), which itself is a stylised black flag:
But I think I'm wrong.
I originally took it as a stylised Black Flag (literally), which itself is a stylised black flag:
But I think I'm wrong.
aperson
+0 -0
Me too.
Me too.
tommythebrat
+3 -0
I think it's the black flag logo edited to look like it's flipping you off. The black flag logo has appeared throughout the comics so it's not too hard to imagine this.
I think it's the black flag logo edited to look like it's flipping you off. The black flag logo has appeared throughout the comics so it's not too hard to imagine this.
hamscout
+0 -0
A comment left by hamscout was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Telescreen, Mustakrakesh, Daravon, retinarow)
A comment left by hamscout was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Telescreen, Mustakrakesh, Daravon, retinarow)
gormster
+58 -1
Holy shit, FUCK Dane Cook.
Holy shit, FUCK Dane Cook.
odei
+6 -0
I find Dane Cook funny in that he will probably die before me, but hopefully before that he will be forgotten.
I find Dane Cook funny in that he will probably die before me, but hopefully before that he will be forgotten.
king_duncan
+1 -0
I enjoy the parts where he rips his shirt off, but the "comedy" portion of his act is kinda boring.
I enjoy the parts where he rips his shirt off, but the "comedy" portion of his act is kinda boring.
sje46
+0 -0
A comment left by sje46 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by theuberwalrus, jacalope, Tucky, Telescreen, farqussus, Ihmgard, Chachibenji, whymog, morbo)
A comment left by sje46 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by theuberwalrus, jacalope, Tucky, Telescreen, farqussus, Ihmgard, Chachibenji, whymog, morbo)
kickstart
+3 -0
this is the internet.
WE HATE EVERYTHING.
Actually, I liked Dane Cook's first album. He seems anymore to be hacky, full of himself, and interested more in noises and jumping around than crafting actual jokes.
this is the internet.
WE HATE EVERYTHING.
Actually, I liked Dane Cook's first album. He seems anymore to be hacky, full of himself, and interested more in noises and jumping around than crafting actual jokes.
chuwie
+0 -0
My understanding is that the people who dislike Dane Cook also dislike Carlos Mencia.
My understanding is that the people who dislike Dane Cook also dislike Carlos Mencia.
sje46
+0 -1
Different brands of comedy, though.
Different brands of comedy, though.
sje46
+0 -1
Well, they are. Care to prove otherwise, Telescreen?
Well, they are. Care to prove otherwise, Telescreen?
wozzeck
+2 -0
Neither are comedy.
Neither are comedy.
tekende
+1 -1
I hate Carlos Mencia.
I kinda like Dane Cook, though. He's pretty funny (from what I've seen, which is maybe half of one of his standup films). Not the best comedian I've ever heard, but amusing enough.
I hate Carlos Mencia.
I kinda like Dane Cook, though. He's pretty funny (from what I've seen, which is maybe half of one of his standup films). Not the best comedian I've ever heard, but amusing enough.
sje46
+0 -1
He's a good storyteller. not the funniest guy, but he is enjoyable to listen to, at least.
He's a good storyteller. not the funniest guy, but he is enjoyable to listen to, at least.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
I have laughed at Dane Cook exactly once. He told a joke about sitting at a restaurant or something, and watching a guy get hit by a car at an intersection.
"Ironically, the car was a Dodge"
I thought that was worth a chuckle. Every other line I've heard was awful.
I have laughed at Dane Cook exactly once. He told a joke about sitting at a restaurant or something, and watching a guy get hit by a car at an intersection.
"Ironically, the car was a Dodge"
I thought that was worth a chuckle. Every other line I've heard was awful.
davey-boy
+0 -0
I thought he was okay in that 'Mister Brooks' movie. That said, I haven't seen his stand up.
I thought he was okay in that 'Mister Brooks' movie. That said, I haven't seen his stand up.
sje46
+0 -0
A comment left by sje46 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by atticusonline, Ihmgard, NumberKillinger)
A comment left by sje46 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by atticusonline, Ihmgard, NumberKillinger)
boredom_man
+1 -1
I'm all out of lames with which to respond to your lame-whinging, and that's the true tragedy.
(Well, other than the existence of Carlos Mencia and Dane Cook.)
I'm all out of lames with which to respond to your lame-whinging, and that's the true tragedy.
(Well, other than the existence of Carlos Mencia and Dane Cook.)
sje46
+0 -2
*hugs for the bitter man*
*hugs for the bitter man*
soupkaty
+3 -0
everyone here should check out Neil Hamburger.
Right now.
everyone here should check out Neil Hamburger.
Right now.
awko
+0 -1
What do you get if you cross an octopus with the Red Hot Chili Peppers?
A junkie with eight arms to shoot up into.
What do you get if you cross an octopus with the Red Hot Chili Peppers?
A junkie with eight arms to shoot up into.
hamscout
+6 -1
What has seven arms and sucks?
Def Leppard
What has seven arms and sucks?
Def Leppard
pogo
+1 -0
Quote:
True. Best laughs since Achewood.
Quote:
everyone here should check out Neil Hamburger.
Right now.
Right now.
True. Best laughs since Achewood.
meddle
+1 -0
FACT: Dane Cook is twice as funny when you don't have to see him. Two times a little still isn't much, but he is definitely funnier when heard and not seen.
FACT: Dane Cook is twice as funny when you don't have to see him. Two times a little still isn't much, but he is definitely funnier when heard and not seen.
meddle
+0 -0
FACT: Dane Cook is twice as funny when you don't have to see him. Two times a little still isn't much, but he is definitely funnier when heard and not seen.
FACT: Dane Cook is twice as funny when you don't have to see him. Two times a little still isn't much, but he is definitely funnier when heard and not seen.
sje46
+8 -0
Two times can be a lot.
Two times can be a lot.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Assetbar Philippe, I don't want to blow your mind here, but there are more comedians out there than Dane Cook and Carlos Mencia! In fact, it is even possible to hate both of them as similar exemplars of a completely unreflective and uninsightful lowest common denominator form of humor!
Once again, Salon said it better than I can:
"Although his delivery can be chafingly smug, Cook doesn't present himself as anything special. He likes video games and chicks and sports and other general-purpose guy stuff. He's not particularly baffled by the world, or all that perceptive, or all that self-aware. He's a little self-deprecating, a little bit cutesy and a little bit aggressive, but most important, he treats mundane experiences like they're huge revelations: Breakup sex is the best, right? Right! Sometimes you have to lie to get out of stuff you don't want to do. I know you've done it, too, bro!
From his sloppy college kid look to his avoidance of anything political, cultural or remotely critical, Cook aims at appealing to those vast numbers of kids who haven't really developed any interests yet, and are most of all focused on having fun with a big group of people. While Seinfeld or Rock or Carlin or Miller react against the world, working themselves into a lather over just how idiotic and bizarre other people's behavior is, Cook's stories all boil down to the most familiar, relatable experiences he's had. His humor doesn't require even a glance at the wider world; it strengthens the bonds within a homogenous group. "Isn't it crazy when you..." or "How weird is it when..." By celebrating the myopia of the young, Cook has become the hottest comedian around."
Assetbar Philippe, I don't want to blow your mind here, but there are more comedians out there than Dane Cook and Carlos Mencia! In fact, it is even possible to hate both of them as similar exemplars of a completely unreflective and uninsightful lowest common denominator form of humor!
Once again, Salon said it better than I can:
"Although his delivery can be chafingly smug, Cook doesn't present himself as anything special. He likes video games and chicks and sports and other general-purpose guy stuff. He's not particularly baffled by the world, or all that perceptive, or all that self-aware. He's a little self-deprecating, a little bit cutesy and a little bit aggressive, but most important, he treats mundane experiences like they're huge revelations: Breakup sex is the best, right? Right! Sometimes you have to lie to get out of stuff you don't want to do. I know you've done it, too, bro!
From his sloppy college kid look to his avoidance of anything political, cultural or remotely critical, Cook aims at appealing to those vast numbers of kids who haven't really developed any interests yet, and are most of all focused on having fun with a big group of people. While Seinfeld or Rock or Carlin or Miller react against the world, working themselves into a lather over just how idiotic and bizarre other people's behavior is, Cook's stories all boil down to the most familiar, relatable experiences he's had. His humor doesn't require even a glance at the wider world; it strengthens the bonds within a homogenous group. "Isn't it crazy when you..." or "How weird is it when..." By celebrating the myopia of the young, Cook has become the hottest comedian around."
sje46
+0 -0
I know that there are other types of comedians out there. [I actually just saw Jimmy Fallon tonight; I just got back. He was good but I have a feeling you wouldn't like his standup.] I'm far from a connieusseur (I hate you, French) of comedy, but I do like a lot of other people, especially Louis C. K., Mitch Hedberg, Demitri Martin, and George Carlin.
I can't stand Mencia, by the way, because . .. . ugg. Too many reasons. He's just . . .dishonest. He gets things wrong. He doesn't understand the world at all, and loves hating. It's different from Carlin's misanthropy because Carlin gave good reasons while Mencia just loved to hate.
And Dane Cook isn't the best comic, I agree. But why should comedy have to be rebellious against the world to be funny? I agree that some of the best comedy is, but not necessarily so. A lot of humor just comes from novel ways of looking at things, which I think Cook provides.
But pretty much I laugh at most comedians as long as I don't detect phoniness in them, and Mencia is rancid. I don't think Dane Cook is. That's just my opinion.
And Cook is a wonderfully storyteller, at least.
I know that there are other types of comedians out there. [I actually just saw Jimmy Fallon tonight; I just got back. He was good but I have a feeling you wouldn't like his standup.] I'm far from a connieusseur (I hate you, French) of comedy, but I do like a lot of other people, especially Louis C. K., Mitch Hedberg, Demitri Martin, and George Carlin.
I can't stand Mencia, by the way, because . .. . ugg. Too many reasons. He's just . . .dishonest. He gets things wrong. He doesn't understand the world at all, and loves hating. It's different from Carlin's misanthropy because Carlin gave good reasons while Mencia just loved to hate.
And Dane Cook isn't the best comic, I agree. But why should comedy have to be rebellious against the world to be funny? I agree that some of the best comedy is, but not necessarily so. A lot of humor just comes from novel ways of looking at things, which I think Cook provides.
But pretty much I laugh at most comedians as long as I don't detect phoniness in them, and Mencia is rancid. I don't think Dane Cook is. That's just my opinion.
And Cook is a wonderfully storyteller, at least.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Louis C.K. is awesome, and Demetri Martin is also awesome as well as a guy that everybody says I look like. The problem I and others have with Dane Cook is that his humor isn't quirky or inventive - it's basically making exaggerated bodily contortions while telling some mundane story, and it's been parodied everywhere from Family Guy to Mad TV. But the worst thing about him is the kind of people he represents and targets, which can only be described as bros. You're not a bro, are you?
Louis C.K. is awesome, and Demetri Martin is also awesome as well as a guy that everybody says I look like. The problem I and others have with Dane Cook is that his humor isn't quirky or inventive - it's basically making exaggerated bodily contortions while telling some mundane story, and it's been parodied everywhere from Family Guy to Mad TV. But the worst thing about him is the kind of people he represents and targets, which can only be described as bros. You're not a bro, are you?
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
I gotta admit, that Family Guy parody was pretty good, especially the shouting random gen Y buzzwords while making wacky bodily motions.
You also forgot hot chicks. A lot of hot chicks think Dane Cook is funny. Also, hot chicks tend to date bros. 2 2
I gotta admit, that Family Guy parody was pretty good, especially the shouting random gen Y buzzwords while making wacky bodily motions.
You also forgot hot chicks. A lot of hot chicks think Dane Cook is funny. Also, hot chicks tend to date bros. 2 2
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
plus you motherfucker PLUS
-|-
plus you motherfucker PLUS
-|-
tekende
+1 -0
Which brings to mind something that, um...Chris Rock, I think, said in a recent interview with GQ Magazine which I will paraphrase here. Basically, there's no objective measure of funniness, so the only real way to judge a comedian is by whether or not their target demographic thinks they're funny, and he used Dane Cook as a specific example (because the interviewer brought him up, I think). Dane Cook's target demographic is college-age girls. If most college-age girls think Dane Cook is funny (and they do, at least enough of them to give him a successful career), then he's funny. If college-age girls don't think he's funny, then he isn't.
Which brings to mind something that, um...Chris Rock, I think, said in a recent interview with GQ Magazine which I will paraphrase here. Basically, there's no objective measure of funniness, so the only real way to judge a comedian is by whether or not their target demographic thinks they're funny, and he used Dane Cook as a specific example (because the interviewer brought him up, I think). Dane Cook's target demographic is college-age girls. If most college-age girls think Dane Cook is funny (and they do, at least enough of them to give him a successful career), then he's funny. If college-age girls don't think he's funny, then he isn't.
atticusonline
+0 -0
Cook is not a wonderful storyteller. While telling a joke, the man goes on more tangents than a college trig class. And good lord...stop laughing at all your jokes.
Damn you, Dane Cook
FUCK YOU
Cook is not a wonderful storyteller. While telling a joke, the man goes on more tangents than a college trig class. And good lord...stop laughing at all your jokes.
Damn you, Dane Cook
FUCK YOU
nigelchaos
+0 -0
That sounds like an introduction to "So you think you might be interested in seeing some stand up comedy but you don't have any defining character traits and you aren't exactly sure what the big deal with being clever is?"
That sounds like an introduction to "So you think you might be interested in seeing some stand up comedy but you don't have any defining character traits and you aren't exactly sure what the big deal with being clever is?"
meddle
+1 -0
Whoops, next time I spend all night doing huge rails of coke and doing push-ups to old Sam Kinison routines maybe I just WILL post again.
Whoops, next time I spend all night doing huge rails of coke and doing push-ups to old Sam Kinison routines maybe I just WILL post again.
thegoodwillgirl
+1 -0
I think Dane Cook is incredibly funny. He is one of a handful of comedians that make me laugh so hard that I cry.
Others include: Kyle Cease. Daniel Tosh. Jim Gaffigan. Demitri Martin.
Not included: Carlos Mencia.
I think Dane Cook is incredibly funny. He is one of a handful of comedians that make me laugh so hard that I cry.
Others include: Kyle Cease. Daniel Tosh. Jim Gaffigan. Demitri Martin.
Not included: Carlos Mencia.
sje46
+1 -0
Try C. K. Louis. He's hilarious.
Try C. K. Louis. He's hilarious.
thegoodwillgirl
+1 -0
YOU ARE THE CUTEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD.
this is why.
YOU ARE THE CUTEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD.
this is why.
awksedperl
+0 -0
Never mind sje46, thegoodwillgirl's correction was better. I withdraw.
Never mind sje46, thegoodwillgirl's correction was better. I withdraw.
awksedperl
+0 -0
I think you mean "Louis C.K." And yes, he is funny, but his show on HBO made me want to kill myself (when I wasn't laughing).
I think you mean "Louis C.K." And yes, he is funny, but his show on HBO made me want to kill myself (when I wasn't laughing).
sje46
+0 -0
Oh, man. I didn't even understand goodwillgirl.
I usually call him Louis C. K. I honestly don't know why I got it backwards.
Why did you want to kill yourself.
Oh, man. I didn't even understand goodwillgirl.
I usually call him Louis C. K. I honestly don't know why I got it backwards.
Why did you want to kill yourself.
awksedperl
+0 -0
'Cause it were powerful depressing. Like "The Honeymooners", only without any hope.
'Cause it were powerful depressing. Like "The Honeymooners", only without any hope.
stereo
+2 -0
When I see Dane Cook, I laugh nervously. In case one of his fans sees me not laughing and decides to kill me.
When I see Dane Cook, I laugh nervously. In case one of his fans sees me not laughing and decides to kill me.
rowboat
+1 -0
This is a conversation about Dane Cook.
....
This is a conversation about Dane Cook.
This is a conversation about Dane Cook.
....
This is a conversation about Dane Cook.
mustakrakesh
+1 -1
Agreed FUCK Dane Cook!
Agreed FUCK Dane Cook!
hamscout
+1 -2
Wow. Thanks for the lame! I wasn't condoning the man, just noticing similarities between symbols!
Why don't you just lame semantics!
*pout*
PS: Dane Cook does indeed suck.
Wow. Thanks for the lame! I wasn't condoning the man, just noticing similarities between symbols!
Why don't you just lame semantics!
*pout*
PS: Dane Cook does indeed suck.
aperson
+0 -0
I'd never heard of the guy. He gets big crowds, huh? Not very funny though.
I'd never heard of the guy. He gets big crowds, huh? Not very funny though.
nerdinexile
+1 -1
Lamed for semantics.
Lamed for semantics.
baryonyx
+0 -0
Don't sweat it, Hamscout. Yesterday someone lamed me for mentioning lynch mobs and I have no idea why.
Don't sweat it, Hamscout. Yesterday someone lamed me for mentioning lynch mobs and I have no idea why.
uforgotpoland
+1 -0
Maybe one of their relatives was lynched, and they thought your comment was not cool.
Maybe one of their relatives was lynched, and they thought your comment was not cool.
farqussus
+0 -0
because they are a terrible rap group.
because they are a terrible rap group.
myfirstpost
+1 -0
So, one time at the mall I jumped down the last 8 steps and APPARENTLY that breaks the escalator.
I yelled, "ESCALATOR TEMPORARILY STAIRS!" Then I cried a little bit on the inside.
Mitch was so superior.
So, one time at the mall I jumped down the last 8 steps and APPARENTLY that breaks the escalator.
I yelled, "ESCALATOR TEMPORARILY STAIRS!" Then I cried a little bit on the inside.
Mitch was so superior.
sje46
+0 -0
Nice! I was just about to mention him. I like him.
Also I like the Amazing Jonathon.
Nice! I was just about to mention him. I like him.
Also I like the Amazing Jonathon.
kickstart
+0 -0
Someone was talking about what ducks eat, and I was like, "Sun chips?"
Someone was talking about what ducks eat, and I was like, "Sun chips?"
hamscout
+0 -0
I got tartar, but shit's under control .
I got tartar, but shit's under control .
tekende
+0 -0
True. Mitch Hedberg is totally awesome. he is the only comedian I've ever bought an album of.
True. Mitch Hedberg is totally awesome. he is the only comedian I've ever bought an album of.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Was. He has been dead a little while now.
Was. He has been dead a little while now.
tekende
+0 -0
Yes.
But dead or no, he remains the only comedian whose album I've purchased. So I think either tense works there.
Yes.
But dead or no, he remains the only comedian whose album I've purchased. So I think either tense works there.
sje46
+0 -0
But dead people aren't awesome.
But dead people aren't awesome.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it's just not awesome when they die.
it's just not awesome when they die.
nigelchaos
+0 -0
Damn.. I wish I had more chubbies for saying what I've been saying for years. V-chub and a wag of the finger and a stern talking to about "being funny" for Dane.
Damn.. I wish I had more chubbies for saying what I've been saying for years. V-chub and a wag of the finger and a stern talking to about "being funny" for Dane.
joestork
+0 -0
Well... the superfinger thing is pretty funny, actually
But still, fuck Dane Cook, etc. etc. and the party line.
(Odd the way Lyle kept his political alignment ambiguous in the first panel, wasn't it? Almost syndicated comic-ish)
Well... the superfinger thing is pretty funny, actually
But still, fuck Dane Cook, etc. etc. and the party line.
(Odd the way Lyle kept his political alignment ambiguous in the first panel, wasn't it? Almost syndicated comic-ish)
decagon
+1 -0
I'm glad it was kept ambiguous. If I found out I shared Lyle's politics, I would be filled with shame.
Fortunately, I already know I don't share Todd's.
I'm glad it was kept ambiguous. If I found out I shared Lyle's politics, I would be filled with shame.
Fortunately, I already know I don't share Todd's.
aperson
+0 -1
Well he believes the moon landings were faked, so... is that Green or Libertarian Party?
Well he believes the moon landings were faked, so... is that Green or Libertarian Party?
sje46
+0 -0
But the flag is waving.
Conformist.
Conformist.
I actually wrote a paper saying that it was faked in seventh grade. In my younger and stupider days.
But the flag is waving.
Conformist.
Conformist.
I actually wrote a paper saying that it was faked in seventh grade. In my younger and stupider days.
biff
+0 -0
I am a member of the Green Party. And I am virtually certain that the moon landings actually happened.
Well, I am not actually a member of the Green Party, because Oklahoma is too backward to recognize the Green Party. But when I lived in Texas, I was a registered member of the Green Party.
And I have worked in the space program. It is remotely possible that the moon landings were faked, but it would have been easier to actually do it than to perpetrate a hoax of that magnitude. Too damn many people were involved.
I am a member of the Green Party. And I am virtually certain that the moon landings actually happened.
Well, I am not actually a member of the Green Party, because Oklahoma is too backward to recognize the Green Party. But when I lived in Texas, I was a registered member of the Green Party.
And I have worked in the space program. It is remotely possible that the moon landings were faked, but it would have been easier to actually do it than to perpetrate a hoax of that magnitude. Too damn many people were involved.
aperson
+0 -0
We need a real Green party member to weigh in on this.
We need a real Green party member to weigh in on this.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Jesus, another damn Okie. We should form our own boards. I shall be king, and Tekende my queen
Jesus, another damn Okie. We should form our own boards. I shall be king, and Tekende my queen
tekende
+10 -0
And you, you will be mean
And I--I'll drink all the time
And you, you will be mean
And I--I'll drink all the time
awksedperl
+0 -0
Those two crazy kids sure pack a lot of livin' into something they're doing "just for one day". And I will nerd myself by saying that the King Crimson cover of that song is pretty good. Fripp played guitar on the original, after all.
Those two crazy kids sure pack a lot of livin' into something they're doing "just for one day". And I will nerd myself by saying that the King Crimson cover of that song is pretty good. Fripp played guitar on the original, after all.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I got a little woman and she won't be true.
I got a little woman and she won't be true.
lateadopter
+0 -0
Well, I got a woman just as mean as she can be.
Well, I got a woman just as mean as she can be.
boredom_man
+0 -0
Ever done the conventions? I was an El Paso delegate in '04...
Wait for it...
I wonner if ju an' me are amigos!
Ever done the conventions? I was an El Paso delegate in '04...
Wait for it...
I wonner if ju an' me are amigos!
achilleselbow
+0 -0
The real question is, why the hell does it even matter? I mean, during the Cold War, maybe, but how does it affect anything one way or the other now whether or not the moon landings were faked? At least the 9/11 conspiracy theories are about something relevant.
The real question is, why the hell does it even matter? I mean, during the Cold War, maybe, but how does it affect anything one way or the other now whether or not the moon landings were faked? At least the 9/11 conspiracy theories are about something relevant.
biff
+0 -0
I totally don't think it matters. I just replied because I was hoping it would make people like me. My mom just lost a bunch of money in the stock market crash, and she can't afford to send out the checks any more, so the people who used to be my friends don't call me now.
I totally don't think it matters. I just replied because I was hoping it would make people like me. My mom just lost a bunch of money in the stock market crash, and she can't afford to send out the checks any more, so the people who used to be my friends don't call me now.
falseprophet
+1 -0
It matters because there are people in this country who don't realize how much their government lies to them, people who lump everyone who believes that their government lies together as crazies and commies.
It does matter because the sad truth is people sometimes need to wake up about the irrelevant stuff before they'll even listen to you about the relevant stuff.
It matters because there are people in this country who don't realize how much their government lies to them, people who lump everyone who believes that their government lies together as crazies and commies.
It does matter because the sad truth is people sometimes need to wake up about the irrelevant stuff before they'll even listen to you about the relevant stuff.
boredom_man
+1 -0
Meh. Paranoia on the Internet is like Hope in New Orleans: not a Plan.
Meh. Paranoia on the Internet is like Hope in New Orleans: not a Plan.
boredom_man
+0 -0
Hmm. I suppose if I found out NASA spent a few million dollars of American taxes to fake a moon landing rather than a few trillion dollars to land on the moon for vanity, I'd, well, I'd be very... hopeful that they do it again?
Hmm. I suppose if I found out NASA spent a few million dollars of American taxes to fake a moon landing rather than a few trillion dollars to land on the moon for vanity, I'd, well, I'd be very... hopeful that they do it again?
sje46
+0 -0
Okay. Who here believes that they were faked?
*Doesn't raise hand*
Okay. Who here believes that they were faked?
*Doesn't raise hand*
aperson
+1 -0
I guess we'll never know if that lame is a Green with no sense of humour, or a Libertarian with no sense of humour.
I guess we'll never know if that lame is a Green with no sense of humour, or a Libertarian with no sense of humour.
pogo
+0 -0
Sorry, Dane who?
Sorry, Dane who?
rowboat
+0 -0
Don't worry about it. Your life will instantly become a little worse if you find out.
Don't worry about it. Your life will instantly become a little worse if you find out.
pogo
+0 -0
I think I'll be happy with discovering Neil Hamburger for now.
I think I'll be happy with discovering Neil Hamburger for now.
saulbellow
+14 -0
westsider8
+0 -0
Tigers only have four "fingers" on their paws, so that flag is as close to a tiger paw flipping you off as you can get. Alas, it is impossible for a tiger to do the shocker.
Tigers only have four "fingers" on their paws, so that flag is as close to a tiger paw flipping you off as you can get. Alas, it is impossible for a tiger to do the shocker.
belgand
+4 -0
It's not exactly impossible, he simply lacks girth on one end. This also has the awesome side-effect of meaning that every time Lyle throws the horns (and thankfully he leads a lifestyle that lends itself to this on what is likely an hourly basis at least) he is also giving out a shocker. Now that's a two-for-one on two-for-ones.
It's not exactly impossible, he simply lacks girth on one end. This also has the awesome side-effect of meaning that every time Lyle throws the horns (and thankfully he leads a lifestyle that lends itself to this on what is likely an hourly basis at least) he is also giving out a shocker. Now that's a two-for-one on two-for-ones.
mrwombat
+0 -0
There are only four fingers needed for a shocker. It would look like Lyleland's flag, upside down.
There are only four fingers needed for a shocker. It would look like Lyleland's flag, upside down.
dunno
+1 -0
now I know why you're smelling your hand.
now I know why you're smelling your hand.
zanello
+0 -0
Considering Lyle has only four fingers, I think the third finger was chosen to portray the middle finger. Why not the second finger?
God there are a lot of fingers in this comment.
Considering Lyle has only four fingers, I think the third finger was chosen to portray the middle finger. Why not the second finger?
God there are a lot of fingers in this comment.
sje46
+0 -0
Is that Scott Tenorman?
That episode is classic .
Is that Scott Tenorman?
That episode is classic .
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
is that the kid whose parents Cartman turns into chili or whatever?
truly classic.
is that the kid whose parents Cartman turns into chili or whatever?
truly classic.
sje46
+0 -0
No!
You ruined the end.
No!
You ruined the end.
zanello
+0 -0
I´d say "Scott Tenorman must die" is probably the cruelest South Park episode ever.
I´d say "Scott Tenorman must die" is probably the cruelest South Park episode ever.
ashoykh
+0 -0
Since Lyle only has 4 fingers, it's his best approximation of a Middle finger.
Since Lyle only has 4 fingers, it's his best approximation of a Middle finger.
saulbellow
+0 -0
saulbellow
+2 -0
Zanello's avatar looks really uncomfortable next to mine.
Zanello's avatar looks really uncomfortable next to mine.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Looks like an avatar with a lot of fingers in it
Looks like an avatar with a lot of fingers in it
sje46
+0 -0
He's looking at his own handle.
He's looking at his own handle.
saulbellow
+0 -0
Meta- meta , dude!
Meta- meta , dude!
sje46
+0 -0
Quick! Someone make a meta-meta- meta out of it!
Quick! Someone make a meta-meta- meta out of it!
saulbellow
+0 -0
You just did!
You just did!
falseprophet
+0 -0
Who's that Pokemon?!
Who's that Pokemon?!
gardenhead_
+1 -0
metapod?
metapod?
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
metapod: the pokemon that never did anything.
...is such a children's book title.
metapod: the pokemon that never did anything.
...is such a children's book title.
sje46
+0 -0
Yes, Metapod.
Because there are only 151 pokemon.
Yes, Metapod.
Because there are only 151 pokemon.
rowboat
+0 -0
Do I even have to ask whether or not you've caught them all?
Do I even have to ask whether or not you've caught them all?
sje46
+0 -0
. . ..
I have shamed my family.
. . ..
I have shamed my family.
steerpike66
+3 -0
It is of course, ambiguous which 'clowns' Lyle is talking about, until you realize that even if a Republican wanted to flee the country, Canada would be the only country white, English-speaking and friendly enough to accept his sorry ass.
It is of course, ambiguous which 'clowns' Lyle is talking about, until you realize that even if a Republican wanted to flee the country, Canada would be the only country white, English-speaking and friendly enough to accept his sorry ass.
bondijames
+1 -0
Actually I'm a Republican American, and Australia has accepted me just fine. I'm even a citizen now! Canada would not accept a Republican, given that even their supposedly right-wing PM Harper is somewhere to the left of the salad fork.
But I would never follow Teodor's suggestion and move to Adelaide, however (shudders).
Actually I'm a Republican American, and Australia has accepted me just fine. I'm even a citizen now! Canada would not accept a Republican, given that even their supposedly right-wing PM Harper is somewhere to the left of the salad fork.
But I would never follow Teodor's suggestion and move to Adelaide, however (shudders).
steerpike66
+2 -0
What IS a Republican these days? Just wondered, what with Bush's gigantic government and fiscal hysteria and all...
What IS a Republican these days? Just wondered, what with Bush's gigantic government and fiscal hysteria and all...
aperson
+13 -0
A Republican is basically this dude who is desperate to start another bread-roll throwing political argument on assetbar. He is a terrible guy, the Republican.
A Republican is basically this dude who is desperate to start another bread-roll throwing political argument on assetbar. He is a terrible guy, the Republican.
wilto
+2 -0
My first reaction was to post "What IS a Republican? A miserable little pile of secrets!" But then I realized people might think I was talking about, y'know, opinions, or things relevant to how the world operates - not fun video game quotes.
Dodged that bullet.
My first reaction was to post "What IS a Republican? A miserable little pile of secrets!" But then I realized people might think I was talking about, y'know, opinions, or things relevant to how the world operates - not fun video game quotes.
Dodged that bullet.
wilto
+1 -0
Has... Has my avatar always been such a mean-muggin' handfacepose? I didn't realize. I gotta take stock.
Has... Has my avatar always been such a mean-muggin' handfacepose? I didn't realize. I gotta take stock.
morypcaina
+0 -0
You steal mens' chubbies, and make them your slaves! wilto ill needs a handface such as you!
You steal mens' chubbies, and make them your slaves! wilto ill needs a handface such as you!
coldfrog
+0 -0
... he says as he hurls his wine at you.
... he says as he hurls his wine at you.
farqussus
+0 -0
Of course we accepted you. We don't care who you are as long as you have the cash.
Of course we accepted you. We don't care who you are as long as you have the cash.
bondijames
+0 -0
Yes, that's basically what my ex-wife said, too!
Yes, that's basically what my ex-wife said, too!
gormster
+0 -0
except that the Australian right wing is just slightly left of the American left wing.
except that the Australian right wing is just slightly left of the American left wing.
featurelessvoid
+0 -0
And the water spirals down the drain the opposite way.
And the water spirals down the drain the opposite way.
rowboat
+1 -0
And her voice is a backwards record.
It's like a whirlpool and it never ends.
And her voice is a backwards record.
It's like a whirlpool and it never ends.
farqussus
+0 -0
Who was at the Dupont pavilion?
I'm sorry, I just can't help myself. Plus I love that song.
Who was at the Dupont pavilion?
I'm sorry, I just can't help myself. Plus I love that song.
rowboat
+0 -0
Don't even try to stop it.
Don't even try to stop it.
howl
+0 -0
Ana Ng lives in the middle of the Indian Ocean :(
Ana Ng lives in the middle of the Indian Ocean :(
stereo
+0 -0
Turns out that's not true .
Turns out that's not true .
speccer
+0 -0
I may have read/skimmed that wrong, but I think it's only saying that the Coriolis effect has nothing to do with the rotation. Not that the rotation in both hemispheres is the same.
I may have read/skimmed that wrong, but I think it's only saying that the Coriolis effect has nothing to do with the rotation. Not that the rotation in both hemispheres is the same.
stereo
+0 -0
Yeah, I guess the Australians design their toilets backwards or something. Crazy.
Yeah, I guess the Australians design their toilets backwards or something. Crazy.
farqussus
+0 -0
We have to sit facing the cistern.
We have to sit facing the cistern.
ishuta
+2 -0
Sweden, dude.
Sweden, dude.
mirzabah
+0 -0
Chubby for the gormenghast reference in your name.
Chubby for the gormenghast reference in your name.
belgand
+0 -0
Well assuming things work more or less along the lines of people of voting age not generally preferring to move somewhere where not only are they capable of speaking the local language, but they might also want to enjoy at least a decent amount of shared culture there are only a few options to consider: Canada (close, basically just the US, but colder), UK (with Ireland because why not?), Australia, and why not throw Jamaica in there as well? Actually, there are a good number more , that list English as the official language, but I'm uncertain how readily one could get by in their daily lives speaking nothing but English. For example India. Maybe I shouldn't make all my decisions on emigrating based on Bollywood films (and by that I mean emigrating to any country), but I don't see a lot of English going on there and frankly if I can't follow a song about why that girl doesn't want to marry some guy I don't think I can live there. I mean, mandate some subtitles at least!
Well assuming things work more or less along the lines of people of voting age not generally preferring to move somewhere where not only are they capable of speaking the local language, but they might also want to enjoy at least a decent amount of shared culture there are only a few options to consider: Canada (close, basically just the US, but colder), UK (with Ireland because why not?), Australia, and why not throw Jamaica in there as well? Actually, there are a good number more , that list English as the official language, but I'm uncertain how readily one could get by in their daily lives speaking nothing but English. For example India. Maybe I shouldn't make all my decisions on emigrating based on Bollywood films (and by that I mean emigrating to any country), but I don't see a lot of English going on there and frankly if I can't follow a song about why that girl doesn't want to marry some guy I don't think I can live there. I mean, mandate some subtitles at least!
pogo
+0 -0
Reality check: None of those countries want Americans to move there, not unless you fill out the proper forms and aren't putting on of their citizens out of work.
Reality check: None of those countries want Americans to move there, not unless you fill out the proper forms and aren't putting on of their citizens out of work.
history
+0 -0
America owns the world, didn't you know? We have the right to go anywhere we want and do anything we want. We've got the guns.
Belgand:
Most of the places you mentioned have extremely tight immigration laws which (I know its shocking!) apply to Americans. The Aussies and Brits are particularly harsh. The Irish are nice if you are related (one Irish grandparent and you are in).
On a side note, being married to a Brit who has an irish mother gets me...well choices where it rains alot.
America owns the world, didn't you know? We have the right to go anywhere we want and do anything we want. We've got the guns.
Belgand:
Most of the places you mentioned have extremely tight immigration laws which (I know its shocking!) apply to Americans. The Aussies and Brits are particularly harsh. The Irish are nice if you are related (one Irish grandparent and you are in).
On a side note, being married to a Brit who has an irish mother gets me...well choices where it rains alot.
drskradley
+0 -0
I wouldn't call what they speak in Jamaica to be English anymore. They've creoled that shit up the wazoo.
I wouldn't call what they speak in Jamaica to be English anymore. They've creoled that shit up the wazoo.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Yah, man. It ain' no ting like wha' ya' larns in skool, but ita stil be Einglish.
Yah, man. It ain' no ting like wha' ya' larns in skool, but ita stil be Einglish.
mattylite
+9 -0
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
seen, Star.
seen, Star.
pogo
+0 -0
Rasta-talk is BETTER than English, mon.
Rasta-talk is BETTER than English, mon.
drskradley
+0 -0
The versions they stick in Hollywood movies is fairly understandable, but the version they have in Jamaican movies is..... ridiculous.
Seriously. That shit needed subtitles. Not just accent, not just different words - it sounded like a different grammatical structure.
The versions they stick in Hollywood movies is fairly understandable, but the version they have in Jamaican movies is..... ridiculous.
Seriously. That shit needed subtitles. Not just accent, not just different words - it sounded like a different grammatical structure.
pogo
+0 -0
It be special, yes mon. Da riddims are different, and terms be invented, but once you break the code, it's a liberating way to speak English, adding back a certain amount of fun and emotion tht can missing from standard English.
It be special, yes mon. Da riddims are different, and terms be invented, but once you break the code, it's a liberating way to speak English, adding back a certain amount of fun and emotion tht can missing from standard English.
speccer
+0 -0
I know it's probably not the same thing, but watching a friend play Grand Theft Auto 4 and converse with the Jamaican NPCs... Yeah, I could only understand the first 3 or so words of each line. If that.
I know it's probably not the same thing, but watching a friend play Grand Theft Auto 4 and converse with the Jamaican NPCs... Yeah, I could only understand the first 3 or so words of each line. If that.
redphillip
+0 -0
Dr., there are movies out of England and Scotland that are unintelligible without subtitles. In some cases even within Great Britain.
Dr., there are movies out of England and Scotland that are unintelligible without subtitles. In some cases even within Great Britain.
drskradley
+0 -0
I've seen some - the further north you go, the closer it straddles the dialect/language border. Particularly the Outer Hebrides.
I've seen some - the further north you go, the closer it straddles the dialect/language border. Particularly the Outer Hebrides.
steerpike66
+2 -0
From Canada, you can see Sarah Palin's house.
From Canada, you can see Sarah Palin's house.
aperson
+2 -0
Fun fact: Sarah Palin lives in a house perched atop a 600 mile high pole.
Fun fact: Sarah Palin lives in a house perched atop a 600 mile high pole.
riazm
+0 -0
Who is it that we (Others) make fun of for having a slutty sister? His sister is perched atop a 600 mile high pole.
Who is it that we (Others) make fun of for having a slutty sister? His sister is perched atop a 600 mile high pole.
aperson
+0 -0
So uh... what news of you mom from the top of the 600 mile high pole?
So uh... what news of you mom from the top of the 600 mile high pole?
drskradley
+0 -0
(The 600 mile high pole is to the North, you see.)
(Give it a minute, you'll get it.)
(The 600 mile high pole is to the North, you see.)
(Give it a minute, you'll get it.)
drskradley
+0 -0
(or just scroll down, whatever)
(or just scroll down, whatever)
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Huh? You talking? To me?
[scroll, scroll, scroll. . .]
Huh? You talking? To me?
[scroll, scroll, scroll. . .]
theirateturk
+0 -0
A comment left by theirateturk was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by jgross, Ham_Shoes, aHatOfPig)
A comment left by theirateturk was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by jgross, Ham_Shoes, aHatOfPig)
aperson
+0 -0
That's nice dear. Eat your weetabix.
That's nice dear. Eat your weetabix.
theirateturk
+0 -0
I can't help how I feel : (
I can't help how I feel : (
aperson
+0 -0
You do need to eat your weetabix though.
You do need to eat your weetabix though.
theirateturk
+0 -0
So do a lot of people. Believe me, I know.
So do a lot of people. Believe me, I know.
theirateturk
+16 -0
I MEAN LOOK AT THE SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES
I MEAN LOOK AT THE SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES
davey-boy
+0 -0
Look at that lecherous old fool Biden, all smacking his lips over the thought of Palin's frigid loins.
Look at that lecherous old fool Biden, all smacking his lips over the thought of Palin's frigid loins.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Some men like popcicles.
Some men like popcicles.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Others like lollipops.
Others like lollipops.
rowboat
+4 -0
I can't help but notice the rhythmic gyrations of her left shoulder. It really works.
Damn. That is kind of hot.
I don't like this.
I can't help but notice the rhythmic gyrations of her left shoulder. It really works.
Damn. That is kind of hot.
I don't like this.
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
Yes, she is a good politician: she really knows how to sell that her pussy is so hot.
Ladies, take note: this is the perfect way to let guys know that your pussy is so hot. That is, with captions and posted on the internet.
Yes, she is a good politician: she really knows how to sell that her pussy is so hot.
Ladies, take note: this is the perfect way to let guys know that your pussy is so hot. That is, with captions and posted on the internet.
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
Is it weird that I feel dirtier looking at this than I do looking at any type of legitimate pornography?
Yet for some reason, I am utterly spellbound.
Is it weird that I feel dirtier looking at this than I do looking at any type of legitimate pornography?
Yet for some reason, I am utterly spellbound.
farqussus
+0 -0
Are you ashamed of the fact that you want to fuck her with an intenisty and fervour that surprises even you?
Are you ashamed of the fact that you want to fuck her with an intenisty and fervour that surprises even you?
thegoodwillgirl
+4 -0
No, I do not swing that way.
"That way" = the way that involves sleeping with republicans.
No, I do not swing that way.
"That way" = the way that involves sleeping with republicans.
stereo
+0 -0
A ball gag should be adequate.
A ball gag should be adequate.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
I don't know. Maybe some of the charm of it is the dishonest pillow talk.
"Oh yeah! Tell me how there'll be no new taxes! Let me read your lips!"
McCain just pledged the other day that he has "no intention" of raising taxes. Weakly worded, yet strangely familiar. . .
I don't know. Maybe some of the charm of it is the dishonest pillow talk.
"Oh yeah! Tell me how there'll be no new taxes! Let me read your lips!"
McCain just pledged the other day that he has "no intention" of raising taxes. Weakly worded, yet strangely familiar. . .
steerpike66
+0 -0
Man, there are too many Christian Bales around here. I am going to change my pic.
Man, there are too many Christian Bales around here. I am going to change my pic.
sje46
+1 -0
Wait, you've seen pornography? How? You're lucky you didn't get caught.
Wait, you've seen pornography? How? You're lucky you didn't get caught.
pogo
+0 -0
Quote:
There's a contradiction in terms! Christ, these kids today, they think everyone should watch meat grinding as a way to understand sex! Sheesh, they're fooling themselves. Polluting their minds with paid for fake fucking.
Quote:
legitimate pornography
There's a contradiction in terms! Christ, these kids today, they think everyone should watch meat grinding as a way to understand sex! Sheesh, they're fooling themselves. Polluting their minds with paid for fake fucking.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Please provide a reasonable source of non-misogynistic, non-violent, X-rated erotica.
Seriously. Where does this stuff live.
Please provide a reasonable source of non-misogynistic, non-violent, X-rated erotica.
Seriously. Where does this stuff live.
farqussus
+0 -0
Gynaecological instructional video?
Gynaecological instructional video?
lechatbotte
+0 -0
He said "non-misogynistic"!
He said "non-misogynistic"!
rowboat
+0 -0
I was really hoping that one of you would have posted a link or two in answer to woodenteeth by now. His question is my question.
My God man, I can abide no more pterodactyl porn!
I was really hoping that one of you would have posted a link or two in answer to woodenteeth by now. His question is my question.
My God man, I can abide no more pterodactyl porn!
boredom_man
+0 -0
The kink.com family of sites prides itself on ethics and has been repeatedly recommended by Dan Savage.
The kink.com family of sites prides itself on ethics and has been repeatedly recommended by Dan Savage.
rowboat
+0 -0
It took me over a year to follow up on kink.com and I can say that it is not what I'm looking for.
It took me over a year to follow up on kink.com and I can say that it is not what I'm looking for.
uforgotpoland
+0 -0
The uh... internet?
The uh... internet?
irondave
+0 -0
Comstock Films.
Comstock Films.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Thanks.
Thanks.
pogo
+0 -0
Quote:
Start with your imagination, then add real emotion, a real plot, some drama, and all sorts of thrills are possible. I'm saying that a gross portrayal of sex is never going to be sexy to me. It's stupid, and base, and demeans the act.
Quote:
non-misogynistic, non-violent, X-rated erotica.
Start with your imagination, then add real emotion, a real plot, some drama, and all sorts of thrills are possible. I'm saying that a gross portrayal of sex is never going to be sexy to me. It's stupid, and base, and demeans the act.
tekende
+3 -0
Sure makes masturbating a lot more fun though.
Sure makes masturbating a lot more fun though.
sje46
+0 -0
True dat, bruddah.
[Not really sure what you guys are talking about.]
True dat, bruddah.
[Not really sure what you guys are talking about.]
pogo
+0 -0
Nudge-nudge, wink-wink, know what I mean?
Nudge-nudge, wink-wink, know what I mean?
pogo
+0 -0
Depends on how high you set your visual tolerance level. For instance, the pictures of women in bras and panties in the Sunday flyers might be enough to get a Mennonite lad off. While you might have seen too much stimulating stuff and need group sex portrayals.
Depends on how high you set your visual tolerance level. For instance, the pictures of women in bras and panties in the Sunday flyers might be enough to get a Mennonite lad off. While you might have seen too much stimulating stuff and need group sex portrayals.
invidious
+0 -0
I'm pretty much at the point were anything less than three girls, two guys (one of them a midget), and a trained pony doesn't even get a raised eyebrow out of me.
I imagine things all day: "I'd like to fuck her, I'd like to fuck her... ooo, that's a nice car. If I could fuck her in that car and then fuck her..." By the end of the day my imagination is worn out. I need the most graphic, disgusting porn you can buy, I need scratch-and-sniff and 3D glasses if they've got it. -- Bobby Slayton
I'm pretty much at the point were anything less than three girls, two guys (one of them a midget), and a trained pony doesn't even get a raised eyebrow out of me.
I imagine things all day: "I'd like to fuck her, I'd like to fuck her... ooo, that's a nice car. If I could fuck her in that car and then fuck her..." By the end of the day my imagination is worn out. I need the most graphic, disgusting porn you can buy, I need scratch-and-sniff and 3D glasses if they've got it. -- Bobby Slayton
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Yea, Victoria's secret was more than sufficient when I was 13 or so. I don't know what happened...
Yea, Victoria's secret was more than sufficient when I was 13 or so. I don't know what happened...
sje46
+0 -0
You realized you liked guys instead, like my Uncle Francis?
It's not bad! I'd still like you!
You realized you liked guys instead, like my Uncle Francis?
It's not bad! I'd still like you!
speccer
+0 -0
Homosexuality is a superpower, after all.
Homosexuality is a superpower, after all.
farqussus
+1 -0
Pogo assumes my imagination is not misogynistic.
Pogo assumes my imagination is not misogynistic.
achilleselbow
+1 -0
Pogo seems unable to comprehend that some people might view pornography for purposes other than educational ones.
Pogo seems unable to comprehend that some people might view pornography for purposes other than educational ones.
pogo
+0 -0
Educational?! That's rich. Except for a future career in porn, what could you possibly learn from it that would be useful in regular life?
Educational?! That's rich. Except for a future career in porn, what could you possibly learn from it that would be useful in regular life?
stereo
+0 -0
How to perform a commodore, for one thing.
How to perform a commodore, for one thing.
invidious
+0 -0
What could you learn? Watch porn with your girlfriend/wife. When she says "if you ever try to do THAT to me I'll kick you right in the crotch," take notes.
What could you learn? Watch porn with your girlfriend/wife. When she says "if you ever try to do THAT to me I'll kick you right in the crotch," take notes.
redphillip
+0 -0
I've learned new tricks, got new ideas of things to try from my viewing. Not to say I might not have come up with everything on my own in due time. But like Lyle said in the last strip, "Science don't get paid to rest, son."
What we need more of is SCIENCE!
I've learned new tricks, got new ideas of things to try from my viewing. Not to say I might not have come up with everything on my own in due time. But like Lyle said in the last strip, "Science don't get paid to rest, son."
What we need more of is SCIENCE!
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Reading comprehension, my dear Pogo. In response to your comment that porn is a terrible way to "understand sex", I suggested that people might view porn for reasons OTHER than learning or understanding. For my part, the only thing I "learn" from porn is how to get through a day without murdering people and setting myself on fire.
Reading comprehension, my dear Pogo. In response to your comment that porn is a terrible way to "understand sex", I suggested that people might view porn for reasons OTHER than learning or understanding. For my part, the only thing I "learn" from porn is how to get through a day without murdering people and setting myself on fire.
boredom_man
+0 -0
Pogo, at 59, has already outlived Allen Ginsberg and Alan Moore combined.
Pogo, at 59, has already outlived Allen Ginsberg and Alan Moore combined.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Alan Moore isn't dead.
Also, to have outlived both of them combined , Pogo would have to be 124 years old.
Please revise and re-submit by the end of the term.
Alan Moore isn't dead.
Also, to have outlived both of them combined , Pogo would have to be 124 years old.
Please revise and re-submit by the end of the term.
boredom_man
+0 -0
Falseprophet, at 23, is too old to recognize sarcasm.
Of course, my comment was removed from the comment of Pogo's it was replying to, about "kids" who enjoy hardcore pornography, instead of Sears catalogs, or whatever. So you have decontextualization.
Falseprophet, at 23, is too old to recognize sarcasm.
Of course, my comment was removed from the comment of Pogo's it was replying to, about "kids" who enjoy hardcore pornography, instead of Sears catalogs, or whatever. So you have decontextualization.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Sarcasm or not, the joke still doesn't make any sense, even in context. I get that you're saying that Pogo's sensibilities about pornography are archaic, but I don't understand why you used Allen Ginsberg and Alan Moore as your analogical reference point other than the fact that their first names are homophones, and that Alan Moore does pornography comic books.
Sarcasm or not, the joke still doesn't make any sense, even in context. I get that you're saying that Pogo's sensibilities about pornography are archaic, but I don't understand why you used Allen Ginsberg and Alan Moore as your analogical reference point other than the fact that their first names are homophones, and that Alan Moore does pornography comic books.
boredom_man
+0 -0
They are two people whose names I believed would be recognizable to Pogo as well-respected pornographers. City Lights went on trial for the publication of Ginsberg's Howl in 1957, so Pogo would've been nine or so. You and I probably heard of him first as a Beat poet, but most Boomers first heard of him as a homosexual Beat pornographer. He seemed the best and obvious example for expressing, "Dude, you're not actually that old." Alan Moore is, as you say, also a pornographer -- I don't know his age, but I grabbed the name of a pornographer I assumed would be recognizable, and since his books are about folks like Thacher and Nixon I assume he's at least Pogo's age. Also I just read his essay "Bog Venus and Nazi Cocks." Great stuff. Probably should've gone with Crumb, though.
They are two people whose names I believed would be recognizable to Pogo as well-respected pornographers. City Lights went on trial for the publication of Ginsberg's Howl in 1957, so Pogo would've been nine or so. You and I probably heard of him first as a Beat poet, but most Boomers first heard of him as a homosexual Beat pornographer. He seemed the best and obvious example for expressing, "Dude, you're not actually that old." Alan Moore is, as you say, also a pornographer -- I don't know his age, but I grabbed the name of a pornographer I assumed would be recognizable, and since his books are about folks like Thacher and Nixon I assume he's at least Pogo's age. Also I just read his essay "Bog Venus and Nazi Cocks." Great stuff. Probably should've gone with Crumb, though.
boredom_man
+0 -0
Hey, I guess you told me how old Moore is, didn't you?
There. You've taken me to school and stuff. For the win.
Hey, I guess you told me how old Moore is, didn't you?
There. You've taken me to school and stuff. For the win.
pogo
+0 -0
Except that I really, really like R. Crumb, since he does cartoon parodies of sex, not actualy pornography where actaul humans get misued.
Except that I really, really like R. Crumb, since he does cartoon parodies of sex, not actualy pornography where actaul humans get misued.
boredom_man
+0 -0
Aesthetics, while an essential component of all art and indeed existence, are fundamentally irrational. Morals have no validity beyond reason and measurable consequence. While they must be constantly married, they must never be conflated, otherwise you get meaningless circular definitions like "I hate pornography because it is that which I hate except for Devil Girl which isn't pornography because I don't hate it."
Aesthetics, while an essential component of all art and indeed existence, are fundamentally irrational. Morals have no validity beyond reason and measurable consequence. While they must be constantly married, they must never be conflated, otherwise you get meaningless circular definitions like "I hate pornography because it is that which I hate except for Devil Girl which isn't pornography because I don't hate it."
pogo
+0 -0
Well, Mr. Boredom Man, that's pretty fancy tap dancing there, except I think the tru marriage of aesthetics and morality would be if we were discussing the most artistic pornography. I'm taking R. Crumb completely out of the porno category, both because he draws cartoons withtout harming actual people, and because he is doing a parody of sexuality using his imagination. My concern is for the "actors" in porn and their debasement.
Well, Mr. Boredom Man, that's pretty fancy tap dancing there, except I think the tru marriage of aesthetics and morality would be if we were discussing the most artistic pornography. I'm taking R. Crumb completely out of the porno category, both because he draws cartoons withtout harming actual people, and because he is doing a parody of sexuality using his imagination. My concern is for the "actors" in porn and their debasement.
sje46
+0 -0
Most porn doesn't "harm" people at all.
And they chose to debase themselves.
Most porn doesn't "harm" people at all.
And they chose to debase themselves.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
I've said it before and I'll say it again: I predict that if we banned all porn, a lot more people would be harmed.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: I predict that if we banned all porn, a lot more people would be harmed.
boredom_man
+0 -0
That is, of course, a praiseworthy concern. It is a valuable moral stance, and it is also a coherent moral stance (equally important). It's not implied by your original objection to porn, but we can roll with it now. I now understand you to be saying that that which debases actors is (possibly nonexclusively) "bad porn." Is that correct? I wholeheartedly agree.
Still, to discuss coherently, we need a definition of "porn" beyond "bad porn." Is "porn" that which debases actors and "erotica" that which does not? Does "porn" refer to the explicitness of the material? Where do things like Tijuana Bibles and the writings of (as opposed to the personal life of) the Marquis de Sade fit in? Are they not porn, harmless pornography because no actors are harmed, or harmful pornography for some other reason?
That is, of course, a praiseworthy concern. It is a valuable moral stance, and it is also a coherent moral stance (equally important). It's not implied by your original objection to porn, but we can roll with it now. I now understand you to be saying that that which debases actors is (possibly nonexclusively) "bad porn." Is that correct? I wholeheartedly agree.
Still, to discuss coherently, we need a definition of "porn" beyond "bad porn." Is "porn" that which debases actors and "erotica" that which does not? Does "porn" refer to the explicitness of the material? Where do things like Tijuana Bibles and the writings of (as opposed to the personal life of) the Marquis de Sade fit in? Are they not porn, harmless pornography because no actors are harmed, or harmful pornography for some other reason?
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Did you know that Alan Moore is Canadian?
Did you know that Alan Moore is Canadian?
boredom_man
+0 -0
AlanMooreFanSite.com says English?
AlanMooreFanSite.com says English?
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
I mean, he's Canadian like AC/DC is Canadian.
I mean, he's Canadian like AC/DC is Canadian.
wonelove
+0 -0
this gets better with each loop.
this gets better with each loop.
farqussus
+1 -0
I gave that a chubby because it gave me one.
I gave that a chubby because it gave me one.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
I could watch that all day.
I could watch that all day.
mattylite
+0 -0
This just gets funnier and funnier every time I look at it. I love how Biden's face looks, too, when I imagine him listening to her say those words.
This just gets funnier and funnier every time I look at it. I love how Biden's face looks, too, when I imagine him listening to her say those words.
heccibiggs
+14 -0
Sarah Palin! What news from the North?
Sarah Palin! What news from the North?
hamscout
+14 -0
"It's awful Maverick-y!!"
"It's awful Maverick-y!!"
spinynorman
+2 -0
Jiminy-jillikers! We gotta gestate the heck outta this rape-baby here!
*wink*
Jiminy-jillikers! We gotta gestate the heck outta this rape-baby here!
*wink*
biff
+0 -0
How do you know it's a rape-baby?
The "victim" couldn't afford a rape kit!
How do you know it's a rape-baby?
The "victim" couldn't afford a rape kit!
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Rape-babies are an important component to the American nukular family.
Goddamnit I still get so mad thinking about her saying nukular.
FUCK!
Rape-babies are an important component to the American nukular family.
Goddamnit I still get so mad thinking about her saying nukular.
FUCK!
achilleselbow
+1 -0
You know, that was so infuriating, because you could TELL that it was intentional. She smiled a little every time she said it, going out of her way to use the word and stress the syllables. The underlying message: "I'm gonna say it this way just to spite all you liberal intellectuals, and there's nothing you can do about it."
You know, that was so infuriating, because you could TELL that it was intentional. She smiled a little every time she said it, going out of her way to use the word and stress the syllables. The underlying message: "I'm gonna say it this way just to spite all you liberal intellectuals, and there's nothing you can do about it."
falseprophet
+0 -0
"I don't know but I'll bring it to ya!"
"I don't know but I'll bring it to ya!"
daidai
+0 -0
Ya, you betcha.
Ya, you betcha.
theguitarhero
+19 -0
"I read ALL the news from the North."
"Well what specific news from the North?
"You know, all of it. I read it all. And I respect it all."
"I read ALL the news from the North."
"Well what specific news from the North?
"You know, all of it. I read it all. And I respect it all."
sje46
+0 -0
Guys, I'm a rebel.
What news from the south ?
Guys, I'm a rebel.
What news from the south ?
kamet
+1 -0
Fuck that. West Siiiiide.
Fuck that. West Siiiiide.
sje46
+0 -0
You misspelled "side".
You misspelled "side".
hedonismbot
+0 -0
You misspelled "SiiieeeeedddddeeeeeeeBBBBOOOOOOOOYYYYYYYYYY!"
You misspelled "SiiieeeeedddddeeeeeeeBBBBOOOOOOOOYYYYYYYYYY!"
invidious
+3 -1
Hedonismbot, what news from Flavor Flav?
Hedonismbot, what news from Flavor Flav?
laserblade
+0 -0
He confirms, several times over, that it is in fact 5:24 PM.
He confirms, several times over, that it is in fact 5:24 PM.
envika
+0 -0
Darn right!
Darn right!
drskradley
+0 -0
It's weird when you see where someone perhaps gets their idea for something. Some other people might get it, as well, I don't know.
It's weird when you see where someone perhaps gets their idea for something. Some other people might get it, as well, I don't know.
saulbellow
+0 -0
Care to expound ?
Care to expound ?
aperson
+0 -0
Independent Republic of Lyle => Alaskan Independence Party.
Pain baby => Palin's secret Downs grand-baby.
Treehouse => Building 7.
"You get a sword" => Al Quaeda.
Uhuh... Oh yeah... {Nodding at drskradley}
Independent Republic of Lyle => Alaskan Independence Party.
Pain baby => Palin's secret Downs grand-baby.
Treehouse => Building 7.
"You get a sword" => Al Quaeda.
Uhuh... Oh yeah... {Nodding at drskradley}
lexsenthur
+0 -0
You don't want him to
You don't want him to
tbtabby
+4 -0
It's weird seeing Lyle form his country right after playing "Strong Badia the Free."
Also, why the Canada-bashing again? First Ray, now Teodor. You'd think Onstad, with his love of alcoholic beverages, would be friendler to a country known for brewing high-quality beer.
It's weird seeing Lyle form his country right after playing "Strong Badia the Free."
Also, why the Canada-bashing again? First Ray, now Teodor. You'd think Onstad, with his love of alcoholic beverages, would be friendler to a country known for brewing high-quality beer.
mczapp
+0 -0
A comment left by mczapp was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by meddle, binlaggin, rumblefish)
A comment left by mczapp was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by meddle, binlaggin, rumblefish)
belgand
+1 -0
I've been told by a friend that Beck's Dark was undrinkable German swill. Score at least one point against Germany.
Not drinking myself I wouldn't know, but perhaps we should consider Belgium instead?
I've been told by a friend that Beck's Dark was undrinkable German swill. Score at least one point against Germany.
Not drinking myself I wouldn't know, but perhaps we should consider Belgium instead?
farqussus
+1 -1
The problem with Belgium is that it's Belgium.
The problem with Belgium is that it's Belgium.
meddle
+0 -0
The problem with Belgium is the free-loading Walloons. Flanders would be better off on its own.
The problem with Belgium is the free-loading Walloons. Flanders would be better off on its own.
aperson
+0 -0
Damn family of Walloons stole the lead off my roof last week, so it's not just a Belgian problem.
Damn family of Walloons stole the lead off my roof last week, so it's not just a Belgian problem.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Dites-doncs!
Dites-doncs!
coldfrog
+0 -0
All this Europe-bashing is making me tout raplapla.
All this Europe-bashing is making me tout raplapla.
rowboat
+0 -0
Where the best tasting beer in the world is from would be a tossup, but the best beer in the world is from the U.S.
Bring it on.
Where the best tasting beer in the world is from would be a tossup, but the best beer in the world is from the U.S.
Bring it on.
farqussus
+0 -0
What other criteria are there other than taste?
And you are wrong as hell.
What other criteria are there other than taste?
And you are wrong as hell.
gormster
+1 -0
USA, your beer is an international joke. We are all laughing at you behind your back. It is getting kind of sad, but still funny, USA.
USA, your beer is an international joke. We are all laughing at you behind your back. It is getting kind of sad, but still funny, USA.
tekende
+0 -0
The USA has plenty of good beer. It's just not as, uh, well-promoted or mainstream or whatever as our shitty beer (Budweiser, Miller, etc.). Actually, this is probably true of many beer-producing countries.
The USA has plenty of good beer. It's just not as, uh, well-promoted or mainstream or whatever as our shitty beer (Budweiser, Miller, etc.). Actually, this is probably true of many beer-producing countries.
rowboat
+0 -0
Say what you want about AB products, Tekende, but keep your grubby words off my High Life and Stag!
Say what you want about AB products, Tekende, but keep your grubby words off my High Life and Stag!
rowboat
+0 -0
[BEER FIGHT]If you're speaking on behalf of the entire world, sure. The rest of the world does indeed have the best tasting beers (though, their bingeability is a bit suspect). But if you're insisting that Australia alone so much as holds a candle, well, that's a whole new joke. It is a joke that I am laughing at.[/BEER FIGHT]
[BEER FIGHT]If you're speaking on behalf of the entire world, sure. The rest of the world does indeed have the best tasting beers (though, their bingeability is a bit suspect). But if you're insisting that Australia alone so much as holds a candle, well, that's a whole new joke. It is a joke that I am laughing at.[/BEER FIGHT]
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
and then there's the case of their Fighting Wines.
and then there's the case of their Fighting Wines.
gormster
+1 -0
Hmm. You know what? I think we have the same problem as the US, I just never realised it until now (and also I had to do a little research on what beers we export). Turns out we export mainly Coopers, Tooheys and CUB/Foster's products, most of which are, I would say, sub-par (though most of Adelaide will beat me up for saying Coopers is anything but liquid gold born from the wings of a silver dove. Except most of them couldn't handle a sentence with that many words.)
Anyway, I don't know if these are even exported, but see if you can get your hands on: Beez Neez (honey wheat beer, very sweet but tasty), anything from Little Creatures, anything from James Squire.
Hmm. You know what? I think we have the same problem as the US, I just never realised it until now (and also I had to do a little research on what beers we export). Turns out we export mainly Coopers, Tooheys and CUB/Foster's products, most of which are, I would say, sub-par (though most of Adelaide will beat me up for saying Coopers is anything but liquid gold born from the wings of a silver dove. Except most of them couldn't handle a sentence with that many words.)
Anyway, I don't know if these are even exported, but see if you can get your hands on: Beez Neez (honey wheat beer, very sweet but tasty), anything from Little Creatures, anything from James Squire.
farqussus
+0 -0
To whom do we export Tooheys and Coopers? It sure as shit ain't London. I wish.
To whom do we export Tooheys and Coopers? It sure as shit ain't London. I wish.
keir
+0 -0
Foster's beers (VB, Carlton etc) are all the damn same.
Beez Neez is for girls.
Coopers Sparkling and Pale Ales are goddamn splendid. Little Creatures Pale however, is the best beer that ever lived. I love that beer. I love it.
Foster's beers (VB, Carlton etc) are all the damn same.
Beez Neez is for girls.
Coopers Sparkling and Pale Ales are goddamn splendid. Little Creatures Pale however, is the best beer that ever lived. I love that beer. I love it.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
moist.
moist.
flazisismuss
+0 -0
If you measure by the aggregate number of good beers that a country produces, I am convinced that the USA wins. If, on the other hand, you measure by the average or median quality of beer produced or consumed, we probably lose. I've had a few good Australian beers, and certainly they're better than Bud/Coors/Miller/Pabst, but none are as good as Rouge, Stone, New Belgium, or hundreds of other microbrews. I should stop with the beer pedantry now.
If you measure by the aggregate number of good beers that a country produces, I am convinced that the USA wins. If, on the other hand, you measure by the average or median quality of beer produced or consumed, we probably lose. I've had a few good Australian beers, and certainly they're better than Bud/Coors/Miller/Pabst, but none are as good as Rouge, Stone, New Belgium, or hundreds of other microbrews. I should stop with the beer pedantry now.
rowboat
+0 -0
No, you've hit it on the head, sir. You said what I wanted to say. What I would have said before all those nail polish-powered bongs I did up in High School.
Though, last night I had a Spaten Optimator for the first time in a few years and I have to say that I can't remember the last time I enjoyed anything alcohol-related so much.
No, you've hit it on the head, sir. You said what I wanted to say. What I would have said before all those nail polish-powered bongs I did up in High School.
Though, last night I had a Spaten Optimator for the first time in a few years and I have to say that I can't remember the last time I enjoyed anything alcohol-related so much.
rowboat
+0 -0
What criteria other than taste? Why, bingeability, of course! The most important trait in any beer!
What criteria other than taste? Why, bingeability, of course! The most important trait in any beer!
davey-boy
+1 -0
In that case, consider American beer to be 'training wheels'.
In that case, consider American beer to be 'training wheels'.
gormster
+0 -0
Have you tried vodka ?
Have you tried vodka ?
farqussus
+1 -0
I will choose drunk over bloated and sleepy any day. Vodka. Vodka, make me a retarded baby.
I will choose drunk over bloated and sleepy any day. Vodka. Vodka, make me a retarded baby.
westacular
+2 -0
I think it's worth pointing out that Chris Onstad's one and only Canadian signing date is the US Election Day. (And my birthday.)
I think it's worth pointing out that Chris Onstad's one and only Canadian signing date is the US Election Day. (And my birthday.)
sje46
+2 -0
Oh my! How old are you going to be?
Are you going to have a party?
Oh my! How old are you going to be?
Are you going to have a party?
speccer
+0 -0
He's going to be 28 if he's not a liar.
He's going to be 28 if he's not a liar.
sje46
+0 -0
Why would he lie?
Only losers lie, and westacular is cool (because he's my friend!)!
Why would he lie?
Only losers lie, and westacular is cool (because he's my friend!)!
woodenteeth
+0 -0
You've really entirely become AP and I feel so proud.
You've really entirely become AP and I feel so proud.
rowboat
+0 -0
But does he know any other tricks?
But does he know any other tricks?
sje46
+1 -0
I can lick my own nose!
*licks nose*
See?
I can lick my own nose!
*licks nose*
See?
rowboat
+0 -0
If you are truly Assetbar Philippe, I feel that I have no choice but to be the Assetbar Lyle.
Merry Crishmash. Here's your preshent.
[ooofff]
If you are truly Assetbar Philippe, I feel that I have no choice but to be the Assetbar Lyle.
Merry Crishmash. Here's your preshent.
[ooofff]
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Can I lick your nose too?
Can I lick your nose too?
boredom_man
+0 -0
How could Hedonismbot be other than the Assetbar Nolan?
How could Hedonismbot be other than the Assetbar Nolan?
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Best answer ever.
Best answer ever.
sje46
+0 -0
=]
=]
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
*splut
*splut
redphillip
+0 -0
This reminds me of a joke I heard ages ago about a gentleman of near-fatal unattractiveness who none the less never lacked for companions due to his oft-demonstrated ability to groom his eyebrows with his tongue.
This reminds me of a joke I heard ages ago about a gentleman of near-fatal unattractiveness who none the less never lacked for companions due to his oft-demonstrated ability to groom his eyebrows with his tongue.
westacular
+0 -0
Actually I'm going to be 27 and apparently I was lazy when entering my birthday into my assetbar profile. That's fixed, now.
Can we still be friends?
I am not going to have a party of my own, but I might go to Chris Onstad's Toronto signing party. (Even better! Hooray!)
Actually I'm going to be 27 and apparently I was lazy when entering my birthday into my assetbar profile. That's fixed, now.
Can we still be friends?
I am not going to have a party of my own, but I might go to Chris Onstad's Toronto signing party. (Even better! Hooray!)
chloraloner
+0 -0
High gravity doesn't always mean high quality, dear.
High gravity doesn't always mean high quality, dear.
bumpishound
+0 -0
Elvis would weigh 648 pounds on Jupiter.
Elvis would weigh 648 pounds on Jupiter.
mattylite
+0 -0
Is that young thin or old fat?
Is that young thin or old fat?
mattylite
+0 -0
Explanatory note: back in the late 80s maybe or maybe early 90s there was a big controversy in the US about which version of Elvis to put on a postage stamp. I think they ended up putting out both ... ?
Explanatory note: back in the late 80s maybe or maybe early 90s there was a big controversy in the US about which version of Elvis to put on a postage stamp. I think they ended up putting out both ... ?
tripleg
+1 -0
my kindergarten teacher, who, in restrospect, was probably a lonely woman, was firmly, firmly pro-skinny elvis. she encouraged us to spread skinny elvis gospel to our families, especially members of the family capable of writing letters to the postmaster general. i believe that had something to do with why i got no cake for my sixth birthday.
my kindergarten teacher, who, in restrospect, was probably a lonely woman, was firmly, firmly pro-skinny elvis. she encouraged us to spread skinny elvis gospel to our families, especially members of the family capable of writing letters to the postmaster general. i believe that had something to do with why i got no cake for my sixth birthday.
speccer
+0 -0
It would have to be old fat, because 648 lbs on Jupiter is 256.32911392405063291139240506329 lbs on Earth. Assuming he was on the "surface".
It would have to be old fat, because 648 lbs on Jupiter is 256.32911392405063291139240506329 lbs on Earth. Assuming he was on the "surface".
sje46
+0 -0
Who needs sig figs?
Who needs sig figs?
pogo
+0 -0
A comment left by pogo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by meddle, Telescreen, rumblefish)
A comment left by pogo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by meddle, Telescreen, rumblefish)
davey-boy
+0 -0
Canada is like a jew's Christmas dinner.
Just really... not all that special.
Canada is like a jew's Christmas dinner.
Just really... not all that special.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Wrong, everyone knows that a Jew's Christmas dinner is Chinese food.
Wrong, everyone knows that a Jew's Christmas dinner is Chinese food.
davey-boy
+0 -0
That's what I had last Thursday, and that's what I am having for lunch tomorrow. I am still waiting for a contradiction.
That's what I had last Thursday, and that's what I am having for lunch tomorrow. I am still waiting for a contradiction.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
It is not popular to chubby you for this Pogo. I am going to chubby you for this Pogo.
It is not popular to chubby you for this Pogo. I am going to chubby you for this Pogo.
mike24
+2 -0
i am from canada, and our beer is far from high quality. the american micro-brew market is vastly superior.
i am from canada, and our beer is far from high quality. the american micro-brew market is vastly superior.
irondave
+0 -0
Thank God for someone who finally has the courage and knowledge to say so. I will except the Unibroue products from your general statement.
Thank God for someone who finally has the courage and knowledge to say so. I will except the Unibroue products from your general statement.
mike24
+0 -0
yeah, quebec is the exception, unibroue and dieu de ciel are phenomenal breweries, but more in the belgian tradition.
yeah, quebec is the exception, unibroue and dieu de ciel are phenomenal breweries, but more in the belgian tradition.
meddle
+0 -0
Man, it is sweet when one is in perfect agreement with some strangers on the internet. Let's all have a pint!
Man, it is sweet when one is in perfect agreement with some strangers on the internet. Let's all have a pint!
catgrl131
+5 -0
Okay!!
Okay!!
kamet
+0 -0
pst... Catgrl131 is a vampire, pass it on
pst... Catgrl131 is a vampire, pass it on
hamscout
+1 -0
O, positively!
O, positively!
tekende
+0 -0
Your pun was so terrible it made blood shoot from my eyes
I cannot see the screen
It is covered in blood
Your pun was so terrible it made blood shoot from my eyes
I cannot see the screen
It is covered in blood
hamscout
+1 -0
Why do you always have to B negative?
Why do you always have to B negative?
tekende
+0 -0
AARGH MY EARS
AARGH MY EARS
hamscout
+0 -0
I'm positive it would be AB solutely cruel for me to continue, so I'll stop.
Sorry I'm so bloody punny.
I'm positive it would be AB solutely cruel for me to continue, so I'll stop.
Sorry I'm so bloody punny.
lechatbotte
+0 -1
A positive statement should not B negative.
A positive statement should not B negative.
irondave
+0 -0
Catgrl is not legal.
Catgrl is not legal.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
... actually, by the look of that, catgrl is probably 300 years old or so...
... actually, by the look of that, catgrl is probably 300 years old or so...
irondave
+1 -0
I'm pretty sure the judge would be having none of that.
I'm pretty sure the judge would be having none of that.
falseprophet
+2 -0
But your honor! I thought she was undead!
But your honor! I thought she was undead!
irondave
+0 -0
I will reduce your sentence by 18 months on account of originality and sheer twistedness.
I will reduce your sentence by 18 months on account of originality and sheer twistedness.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
(How many words do you have to take out of a sentence to reduce it by 18 months?)
(How many words do you have to take out of a sentence to reduce it by 18 months?)
catgrl131
+3 -0
Well, two. Provided those two words are "18" and "months".
Well, two. Provided those two words are "18" and "months".
theirateturk
+0 -0
One time I got involved in a bitter wikipedia dispute with some douchebag who tried to point out that Mike Myers is Canadian in an article FOR NO FUCKING REASON WHATSOEVER.
One time I got involved in a bitter wikipedia dispute with some douchebag who tried to point out that Mike Myers is Canadian in an article FOR NO FUCKING REASON WHATSOEVER.
aperson
+1 -0
Mentioning that somebody is Canadian is hugely POV. Hugely .
Mentioning that somebody is Canadian is hugely POV. Hugely .
farqussus
+0 -0
Is that POV as in the acronym, or the Australianism that means stricken with poverty.
Is that POV as in the acronym, or the Australianism that means stricken with poverty.
aperson
+0 -0
Wikipedia style. We also say pov here in the UK as well, though not much - because there is very little poverty.
Wikipedia style. We also say pov here in the UK as well, though not much - because there is very little poverty.
gormster
+0 -0
I assume that is a hilarious joke.
I assume that is a hilarious joke.
aperson
+0 -0
Why no chubby? Well luckily you assumed wrong.
Why no chubby? Well luckily you assumed wrong.
farqussus
+0 -0
Where in the UK do you live? Clearly not Glasgow.
Where in the UK do you live? Clearly not Glasgow.
uforgotpoland
+0 -0
Neither serious nor hilarious. Is that Eric Idle there?
Neither serious nor hilarious. Is that Eric Idle there?
aperson
+0 -0
Most perceptive your majesty. It was a really really crap joke. Farqussus I have lived in Glasgow in the past, so I know there is poverty in the UK. And terrible pies.
Most perceptive your majesty. It was a really really crap joke. Farqussus I have lived in Glasgow in the past, so I know there is poverty in the UK. And terrible pies.
farqussus
+0 -0
No, it's Lemming of the BDA
No, it's Lemming of the BDA
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it's a man's life in ---no, stopping here.
it's a man's life in ---no, stopping here.
syncopation
+1 -0
This is definitely one of those cases of a great alignment of comment and avatar.
This is definitely one of those cases of a great alignment of comment and avatar.
cthulhu235
+2 -0
Speaking of avatars, yours has two sets of testicles, so divine.
Speaking of avatars, yours has two sets of testicles, so divine.
mattylite
+1 -0
But does it have a pocketfull of horses, and does it fuck the shit out of bears?
But does it have a pocketfull of horses, and does it fuck the shit out of bears?
cthulhu235
+0 -0
Verily, it even threw a knife into heaven and can kill with a stare.
Verily, it even threw a knife into heaven and can kill with a stare.
stereo
+0 -0
It will save children!
It will save children!
falseprophet
+0 -0
But not the British children.
But not the British children.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
He'll save the children!
He'll save the children!
stereo
+0 -0
But not the British children.
But not the British children.
sje46
+0 -0
He made love like an eagle, falling out of the sky.
Killed his sensei in a duel and never said why .
He made love like an eagle, falling out of the sky.
Killed his sensei in a duel and never said why .
catgrl131
+0 -0
Washington, Washington.
Twelve stories high, made of radiation.
Washington, Washington.
Twelve stories high, made of radiation.
speccer
+0 -0
He's coming. He's coming.
He's coming. He's coming.
sje46
+0 -0
I showed my buddies this video expecting much mirth and enjoyment.
There was nothing.
I showed my buddies this video expecting much mirth and enjoyment.
There was nothing.
ham_shoes
+0 -0
Them: "How do you know that Mike Myers isn't Canadian?" You: WHY FIND OUT
Them: "How do you know that Mike Myers isn't Canadian?" You: WHY FIND OUT
matt420
+0 -2
why is achewood sucking now
why is achewood sucking now
pravda
+6 -0
The last strip was pretty great, unless you're retarded. You're not retarded are you?
EVERYONE WHO HAS OPINIONS THAT ARE DIFFERENT THAN MINE IS RETARDED.
The last strip was pretty great, unless you're retarded. You're not retarded are you?
EVERYONE WHO HAS OPINIONS THAT ARE DIFFERENT THAN MINE IS RETARDED.
tommythebrat
+2 -0
Well everything I don't like is EMO!
Well everything I don't like is EMO!
sje46
+0 -0
Is it a sin to be retarded?
I remember that Philippe used to be, once. But then he was five.
Is it a sin to be retarded?
I remember that Philippe used to be, once. But then he was five.
matt420
+2 -0
if you like it i'm not going to yell at you because it's okay for people to like things
it just seems like the humor has changed and instead of being subtle excellent character-driven comedy it's obnoxious family-guy what if?? situations that are just awkward, and yeah i really disliked yesterday's comic except for the lyle's final line
i just realized i'm arguing with strangers online about whether or not a webcomic is good, i think i need to go to bed
if you like it i'm not going to yell at you because it's okay for people to like things
it just seems like the humor has changed and instead of being subtle excellent character-driven comedy it's obnoxious family-guy what if?? situations that are just awkward, and yeah i really disliked yesterday's comic except for the lyle's final line
i just realized i'm arguing with strangers online about whether or not a webcomic is good, i think i need to go to bed
rowboat
+0 -0
Why else would you be here?
Why else would you be here?
lechatbotte
+0 -0
"Why else do you think?" he said argumentatively.
"Why else do you think?" he said argumentatively.
nicklon
+8 -0
in my opinion, achewood is best when not mixed with politics
in my opinion, achewood is best when not mixed with politics
deadpool
+4 -0
Achewood
Total Cooking Time: 2-3 Hours
Active cooking time: 10 Minutes
Makes: 1 Serving
Ingredients:
2 tablespoons sarcasm (finely ground with a zester)
3 and 1/2 cups of words you've never heard (sprinkle lightly over the base)
4 heaping spoonfuls of black and white line drawings (Be sure these are very similar to the ones the last time you prepared an Achewood)
1 quart chicken breast (for flavor)
Instructions:
1.) In a large mixing bowl, combine the ground sarcasm and the chicken breast. Use this time to begin thinking of new material for the next time you make Achewood.
2.) Using a blender, grind up the line drawings until they are a silky goop. This is key in the solidification of the finished product.
3.) Gently pour the line drawings in with the sarcasm and chicken in the bowl. Make sure no politics get in, because this could seriously change your results.
4.) Put mixture in oven and set to Broil on High.
5.) Allow it to cook for an hour and 50 minutes. If it starts to smell burnt, you're doing it right, don't worry.
6.) Remove the charred concoction from the oven and sprinkle on the words you've never heard as garnish.
7.) Serve and enjoy!
Achewood
Total Cooking Time: 2-3 Hours
Active cooking time: 10 Minutes
Makes: 1 Serving
Ingredients:
2 tablespoons sarcasm (finely ground with a zester)
3 and 1/2 cups of words you've never heard (sprinkle lightly over the base)
4 heaping spoonfuls of black and white line drawings (Be sure these are very similar to the ones the last time you prepared an Achewood)
1 quart chicken breast (for flavor)
Instructions:
1.) In a large mixing bowl, combine the ground sarcasm and the chicken breast. Use this time to begin thinking of new material for the next time you make Achewood.
2.) Using a blender, grind up the line drawings until they are a silky goop. This is key in the solidification of the finished product.
3.) Gently pour the line drawings in with the sarcasm and chicken in the bowl. Make sure no politics get in, because this could seriously change your results.
4.) Put mixture in oven and set to Broil on High.
5.) Allow it to cook for an hour and 50 minutes. If it starts to smell burnt, you're doing it right, don't worry.
6.) Remove the charred concoction from the oven and sprinkle on the words you've never heard as garnish.
7.) Serve and enjoy!
sje46
+5 -0
You forgot the weed.
You forgot the weed.
deadpool
+0 -0
That's an garnish that I neglected to mention.
That's an garnish that I neglected to mention.
deadpool
+0 -0
That's an typo. D'oh.
That's an typo. D'oh.
bumpishound
+1 -0
Will there be sides?
Will there be sides?
woodenteeth
+4 -0
You may like to try the Assetbar Entree but you will need 12,000 or more cooks and the broth must be utterly fucking spoiled.
You may like to try the Assetbar Entree but you will need 12,000 or more cooks and the broth must be utterly fucking spoiled.
lateadopter
+0 -0
I first read that as "12,000 or more cocks" and it did not seem inappropriate.
I first read that as "12,000 or more cocks" and it did not seem inappropriate.
sje46
+0 -0
Like, a bag of them?
Like, a bag of them?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
It will fly at you.
It will fly at you.
tommythebrat
+3 -1
Good thing this is barely political at all then. It's about a tiger that attempts to live in the back garden.
Good thing this is barely political at all then. It's about a tiger that attempts to live in the back garden.
firedmyass
+0 -1
in my opinion, comments are best when not mixed with irrelevancy
in my opinion, comments are best when not mixed with irrelevancy
nerdinexile
+2 -0
in my opinion, assetbar is best when not mixed with [b]BBcode[b]
in my opinion, assetbar is best when not mixed with [b]BBcode[b]
rowboat
+0 -0
Assetbar is best when it's ONE ON ONE.
I want your Assetbar.
Assetbar is best when it's ONE ON ONE.
I want your Assetbar.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Take me rowboat!
Take me rowboat!
pogo
+0 -0
Quote:
Are you taking your meds?
Quote:
why is achewood sucking now?
Are you taking your meds?
alittlenothing
+0 -0
Yeah, this is a new low for Lyle's character. Where did the days of vomit geysers go?
Yeah, this is a new low for Lyle's character. Where did the days of vomit geysers go?
ishuta
+0 -1
Wikipedia!
Wikipedia!
saulbellow
+0 -0
CAS duly noted.
CAS duly noted.
sweetlips
+0 -0
Wait no stop. Joni Mitchell, Neil Young, Arcade Fire, and Godspeed You! Black Emperor are all from Canada JUST TO NAME A FEW.
Wait no stop. Joni Mitchell, Neil Young, Arcade Fire, and Godspeed You! Black Emperor are all from Canada JUST TO NAME A FEW.
fineoakstructure
+3 -0
Also: AC/DC, Youssou N'Dour, the Red Army Men's Chorus, Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, Better than Ezra, Ustad Ali Akbar Khan, Paolo Conte and Celine Dion.
Also: AC/DC, Youssou N'Dour, the Red Army Men's Chorus, Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, Better than Ezra, Ustad Ali Akbar Khan, Paolo Conte and Celine Dion.
usversusthem
+1 -0
And let's not forget Black Flag, either.
And let's not forget Black Flag, either.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Isn't Black Flag from California?
MY WHOLE LIFE IS A LIE!
Isn't Black Flag from California?
MY WHOLE LIFE IS A LIE!
lunchbox
+1 -2
Black Flag comes from wherever bad music comes from.
Black Flag comes from wherever bad music comes from.
fineoakstructure
+3 -0
I'm going to rise above that insult to Black Flag.
I'm going to rise above that insult to Black Flag.
mrwombat
+0 -0
Black Flag is from California, as is bad music. Everybody wins!
Black Flag is from California, as is bad music. Everybody wins!
theguitarhero
+1 -0
It's gonna take a six pack to make me forget you just said that.
It's gonna take a six pack to make me forget you just said that.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Really? Because it takes at least a case of twenty-four for me forget that California is a cultural sewer.
Really? Because it takes at least a case of twenty-four for me forget that California is a cultural sewer.
tripleg
+1 -0
hey now. i'll admit my beloved golden state has foisted a lot of questionable content out upon an unsuspecting world, but we're more of a polluted river than a sewer. don't blame us, blame the factory upstream.
hey now. i'll admit my beloved golden state has foisted a lot of questionable content out upon an unsuspecting world, but we're more of a polluted river than a sewer. don't blame us, blame the factory upstream.
morypcaina
+3 -0
yeah. fuck OREGON
yeah. fuck OREGON
achilleselbow
+1 -0
But at least they didn't produce Questionable Content.
But at least they didn't produce Questionable Content.
preston
+1 -0
Maybe, but it does bring you this here comic strip.
Maybe, but it does bring you this here comic strip.
awksedperl
+0 -0
I'm about to have a nervous breakdown, my head really hurts...
I'm about to have a nervous breakdown, my head really hurts...
woodenteeth
+0 -0
AC/DC? I'm confused.
AC/DC? I'm confused.
rowboat
+0 -0
I think he was lying.
I think he was lying.
tekende
+0 -0
It takes at least two good bands each to make up for Better Than Ezra and Celine Dion.
It takes at least two good bands each to make up for Better Than Ezra and Celine Dion.
blueloggy
+0 -0
No. It is impossible to make up for Celine Dion.
No. It is impossible to make up for Celine Dion.
zeal
+0 -0
Thinking about Celine Dion has made the tiny cat very sad.
Thinking about Celine Dion has made the tiny cat very sad.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Let's talk about the horrible garbage that spews forth in a never ending torrent from the dark maw of the US music industry. I think the rule is, everywhere makes shitty music. It's good business sense.
Let's talk about the horrible garbage that spews forth in a never ending torrent from the dark maw of the US music industry. I think the rule is, everywhere makes shitty music. It's good business sense.
tekende
+2 -0
I wasn't trying to slam Canada, just Better Than Ezra and Celine Dion.
Many of my favorite bands are from Canada, including Stars, Arcade Fire, Broken Social Scene, and I'm sure a host of others that aren't coming to mind at the moment.
I wasn't trying to slam Canada, just Better Than Ezra and Celine Dion.
Many of my favorite bands are from Canada, including Stars, Arcade Fire, Broken Social Scene, and I'm sure a host of others that aren't coming to mind at the moment.
irondave
+0 -0
Crash Test Dummies and Barenaked Ladies, right?
Crash Test Dummies and Barenaked Ladies, right?
irondave
+0 -0
Chilliwack?
Chilliwack?
stereo
+0 -0
Oasis, Blur, Gorillaz, Harvey Danger, Holy Fuck
Oasis, Blur, Gorillaz, Harvey Danger, Holy Fuck
stereo
+2 -0
The Guess Who, Steppenwolf, Garou, Canadian Usher
The Guess Who, Steppenwolf, Garou, Canadian Usher
davey-boy
+1 -0
Leonard Cohen, Gordon Lightfoot, The Tragically Hip.
Leonard Cohen, Gordon Lightfoot, The Tragically Hip.
irondave
+0 -0
You forgot Bachman-Turner Overdrive. I heard that Randy Bachman died the other day, R.I.P. Also Jeff Healey.
You forgot Bachman-Turner Overdrive. I heard that Randy Bachman died the other day, R.I.P. Also Jeff Healey.
snidedk
+0 -0
I hate Jeff Healey. Not because he's a bad musician - he's fantastic - but because THAT BLIND MAN PLAYS GUITAR BETTER THAN I DO.
I hate Jeff Healey. Not because he's a bad musician - he's fantastic - but because THAT BLIND MAN PLAYS GUITAR BETTER THAN I DO.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Randy Bachman is not dead.
The other day Aperson tries to put it past me that 'The Burt' past on and now this. What the hell, Assetbar?
Randy Bachman is not dead.
The other day Aperson tries to put it past me that 'The Burt' past on and now this. What the hell, Assetbar?
davey-boy
+0 -0
Jeff Healey is dead, though. That is a shame.
Jeff Healey is dead, though. That is a shame.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Since it seems apperrant that no one else will say it, Stan Rogers.
Since it seems apperrant that no one else will say it, Stan Rogers.
featurelessvoid
+0 -0
Metric
Metric
falseprophet
+0 -0
Cadence Weapon, K-Os, Dalek
Cadence Weapon, K-Os, Dalek
falseprophet
+0 -0
** Oh wait, shit, Dalek is from New Jersey.
** Oh wait, shit, Dalek is from New Jersey.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Look up Chuggo, and change your life. Canadia's finest
Look up Chuggo, and change your life. Canadia's finest
davey-boy
+0 -0
Oh Jesus, he's Canadian? That's worse than Mike Myers.
Oh Jesus, he's Canadian? That's worse than Mike Myers.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
God dammit, we've already been through this.
God dammit, we've already been through this.
stereo
+2 -0
More like 7.62 cm of Blood!
More like 7.62 cm of Blood!
emosexy
+1 -0
RUSH
RUSH
ham_shoes
+1 -0
a-and don't forget the Rolling Stones
a-and don't forget the Rolling Stones
sweetlips
+0 -0
AC/DC is so from Australia.
AC/DC is so from Australia.
farqussus
+0 -0
AC/DC? Are you making funnies?
AC/DC? Are you making funnies?
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
I'll give you a hint: one of these things is not like the other.
(Answer: they are all from Canada, except Celine Dion. Celine Dion is from Hell.)
I'll give you a hint: one of these things is not like the other.
(Answer: they are all from Canada, except Celine Dion. Celine Dion is from Hell.)
tripperday
+0 -0
Of course the only one that everyone notices is AC/DC.
Of course the only one that everyone notices is AC/DC.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Yeah...I thought the Red Army Men's Chorus was the real give away.
Yeah...I thought the Red Army Men's Chorus was the real give away.
lateadopter
+0 -0
Why do you have a picture of my cat, tripperday? She is insane.
Why do you have a picture of my cat, tripperday? She is insane.
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
Because your pussy is so hot?
Because your pussy is so hot?
sje46
+2 -0
And the guys who replaced John, George and Ringo.
Paul is from Liverpool, naturally.
And the guys who replaced John, George and Ringo.
Paul is from Liverpool, naturally.
midgetron
+0 -0
Had I not seen your comment yesterday I would have simply passed this comment by, but because I am an informed achewood reader I know it is proper to give this a chubby.
Had I not seen your comment yesterday I would have simply passed this comment by, but because I am an informed achewood reader I know it is proper to give this a chubby.
sje46
+0 -0
Why thank you good sir!
Why thank you good sir!
jaypage
+0 -0
err, ac/dc are australian.
err, ac/dc are australian.
sje46
+0 -1
WIKIPEDIA:
Quote:
WIKIPEDIA:
Quote:
AC/DC (sometimes seen as AC%u21AFDC) are an Australian hard rock band formed in Sydney, Australia in 1973 by brothers Angus and Malcolm Young. Although the band are considered pioneers of heavy metal,[1][2] its members have always classified their music as "rock 'n' roll".[3]
farqussus
+0 -0
Well that's irrefutable!
Well that's irrefutable!
sje46
+3 -0
Well, maybe it's another AC/DC. See AC/DC(disambiguation).
Well, maybe it's another AC/DC. See AC/DC(disambiguation).
irondave
+1 -0
IT WAS A JOKE, OKAY?!
IT WAS A JOKE, OKAY?!
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
v-chub for saying what I've been thinking for a few hours now.
v-chub for saying what I've been thinking for a few hours now.
woodenteeth
+1 -0
Yeah, I added to the barrage of "guess what I'm immediately confused, here's a knee-jerk reaction" and now I am the guy who sucks.
Yeah, I added to the barrage of "guess what I'm immediately confused, here's a knee-jerk reaction" and now I am the guy who sucks.
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
Dear woodenteeth.
I have chubbied you three times for your comments on this strip.
Apparently, I am your biggest fan!
Sincerely,
thegoodwillgirl
Dear woodenteeth.
I have chubbied you three times for your comments on this strip.
Apparently, I am your biggest fan!
Sincerely,
thegoodwillgirl
kamet
+0 -0
Dear thegoodwillgirl.
I have chubbied you, at least once today, very ferociously.. which in some states is illegal. Please don't tell the cops on me.
With respect and chubs,
kamet
Dear thegoodwillgirl.
I have chubbied you, at least once today, very ferociously.. which in some states is illegal. Please don't tell the cops on me.
With respect and chubs,
kamet
lechatbotte
+0 -0
(Where's Hedo when we need him?)
(Where's Hedo when we need him?)
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Dear thegoodwillgirl,
I kinda pictured your avatar there as yourself waddling toward me for an awkward, bony, intensely scary hug.
Orrrhhh come here then,
*ouch*
~woodenteeth
Dear thegoodwillgirl,
I kinda pictured your avatar there as yourself waddling toward me for an awkward, bony, intensely scary hug.
Orrrhhh come here then,
*ouch*
~woodenteeth
tommythebrat
+0 -0
So are Propagandhi.
So are Propagandhi.
jthm_guitarist
+0 -0
What
about
RUSH?
What
about
RUSH?
featurelessvoid
+0 -0
It was the best Big Audio Dynamite song ever. I fondly remember listening to it in grad school while studying for exams.
Suddenly I feel very old.
It was the best Big Audio Dynamite song ever. I fondly remember listening to it in grad school while studying for exams.
Suddenly I feel very old.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I am younger than you... yet experience the same feeling.
Rush for a change of atmosphere so our Rheumatism doesn't play up as much .
I am younger than you... yet experience the same feeling.
Rush for a change of atmosphere so our Rheumatism doesn't play up as much .
null
+1 -0
I think the flag is a raised middle finger, and I liked this comic more before all the politics in the comments.
I think the flag is a raised middle finger, and I liked this comic more before all the politics in the comments.
terebikun
+0 -0
oh, so that's why i took an imperialism class a couple summers ago, so later i could read a comic on the internet about stuffed animals and understand a sarah bartmaan reference. thank you, college, you saved me 30 seconds on google.
oh, so that's why i took an imperialism class a couple summers ago, so later i could read a comic on the internet about stuffed animals and understand a sarah bartmaan reference. thank you, college, you saved me 30 seconds on google.
brak497
+1 -0
I'd like to officially start a "Put the flag on a t shirt movement." Possibly with "In Lyle we trust" emblazoned on the back.
I'd like to officially start a "Put the flag on a t shirt movement." Possibly with "In Lyle we trust" emblazoned on the back.
taftd
+0 -0
Seconded
Seconded
saulbellow
+0 -0
your avatar is mad at your handle oh no I have become an internet nerd
your avatar is mad at your handle oh no I have become an internet nerd
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
I think you you became an internet nerd when you made your handle saulbellow and your avatar a picture of Saul Bellow and, at times, kind of pretended to be Saul Bellow.
Wait, you're not Saul Bellow, are you?
I think you you became an internet nerd when you made your handle saulbellow and your avatar a picture of Saul Bellow and, at times, kind of pretended to be Saul Bellow.
Wait, you're not Saul Bellow, are you?
speccer
+0 -0
I don't think you said Saul Bellow enough in that post about the similarities between saulbellow and Saul Bellow.
I don't think you said Saul Bellow enough in that post about the similarities between saulbellow and Saul Bellow.
saulbellow
+0 -0
Yes, because there's nothing the Internet-qua-Internet community loves more than 20th-century American literature.
Yes, because there's nothing the Internet-qua-Internet community loves more than 20th-century American literature.
saulbellow
+0 -0
Meaning: There's a difference between a nerd on the Internet (which I have always been) and an Internet nerd (which I think I just became).
Meaning: There's a difference between a nerd on the Internet (which I have always been) and an Internet nerd (which I think I just became).
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Understood, but my underlying (though not explicitly stated) point was that using the anonymity of the Internet to wrap yourself up in someone else's identity (in a way the internet kids call "meta," I believe) is a pretty Internet nerd thing to do.
Understood, but my underlying (though not explicitly stated) point was that using the anonymity of the Internet to wrap yourself up in someone else's identity (in a way the internet kids call "meta," I believe) is a pretty Internet nerd thing to do.
sje46
+0 -0
We should all do it. I call James Joyce!
We should all do it. I call James Joyce!
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I call Dan Brown!
I call Dan Brown!
lechatbotte
+1 -0
You too? I call Dan Brown too - but he never answers!
You too? I call Dan Brown too - but he never answers!
sje46
+0 -0
You guys should be fighting over a real writer like Thomas Wolfe or Franz Kafka or K. A. Applegate.
You guys should be fighting over a real writer like Thomas Wolfe or Franz Kafka or K. A. Applegate.
stereo
+0 -0
Hi, I'm the temporally misaligned reincarnation of Thomas Pynchon. who said you had to be born again after you died
Hi, I'm the temporally misaligned reincarnation of Thomas Pynchon. who said you had to be born again after you died
notcool
+0 -0
I call dibs on C. S. Lewis!
He's dreamy...
I call dibs on C. S. Lewis!
He's dreamy...
pogo
+0 -0
I want Falkner.
I want Falkner.
laserblade
+0 -0
I am callink of Vladimir Putin.
I am callink of Vladimir Putin.
woodenteeth
+8 -0
Dan Brown... have my retarded novella.
Dan Brown... have my retarded novella.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Ooh Yeaaah!
Ooh Yeaaah!
daniellesteele
+0 -0
what a bunch of hacks
what a bunch of hacks
kamet
+0 -0
Anybody want some snacks?
Anybody want some snacks?
mattylite
+0 -0
No more rhyming, and I mean it.
No more rhyming, and I mean it.
kamet
+2 -0
Blah blah peanut.
Blah blah peanut.
sje46
+0 -0
Certainly not K. A. Applegate.
Certainly not K. A. Applegate.
howl
+0 -0
This must be at least the third time you have mentioned the Animorphs.
This must be at least the third time you have mentioned the Animorphs.
sje46
+0 -0
Yes. That is the fourth time I mentioned animorphs. I also mentioned James Joyce ten times and the beatles 72 times.
Yes. That is the fourth time I mentioned animorphs. I also mentioned James Joyce ten times and the beatles 72 times.
saulbellow
+1 -0
i hope my internet kids are safe from real-life predators such as velociraptor
i hope my internet kids are safe from real-life predators such as velociraptor
bumpishound
+0 -0
Are you an Internet nerd, an Internet chunkity-ass, or an Internet chunkity-ass nerd?
Are you an Internet nerd, an Internet chunkity-ass, or an Internet chunkity-ass nerd?
saulbellow
+0 -0
Your handle should be drei_bones
Your handle should be drei_bones
kickstart
+0 -0
Training for fake marines, brb
Training for fake marines, brb
lechatbotte
+4 -2
Y'all are being a bit rough on this one!
1. Not really a political cartoon at all!
2. The politics only serve to set up the scenario - this appears to be a start to a story line in which Lyle starts his own country, which is a concept repleat with possibility.
3. Big slam on the Wikipedia styles and how abused they get from time to time.
4. Not really a diss on Canada, he just had to eliminate it as an option before it made any sense for Lyle to start his own country.
5. Is stuffed otter poo really an energy source?
6. The "fuck you" flag is flat out funny.
7. While Martin Short may be the queen from Canada, they have not put him on the coin. So funny!
Seriously, this didn't back either candidate or espouse any political view. This isn't about politics at all! Please restore your knee jerks to the closed and locked position.
Y'all are being a bit rough on this one!
1. Not really a political cartoon at all!
2. The politics only serve to set up the scenario - this appears to be a start to a story line in which Lyle starts his own country, which is a concept repleat with possibility.
3. Big slam on the Wikipedia styles and how abused they get from time to time.
4. Not really a diss on Canada, he just had to eliminate it as an option before it made any sense for Lyle to start his own country.
5. Is stuffed otter poo really an energy source?
6. The "fuck you" flag is flat out funny.
7. While Martin Short may be the queen from Canada, they have not put him on the coin. So funny!
Seriously, this didn't back either candidate or espouse any political view. This isn't about politics at all! Please restore your knee jerks to the closed and locked position.
tommythebrat
+2 -0
Typical weak-willed centrist response!
Typical weak-willed centrist response!
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Typical rebel-rouser trype response.
Seriously, where's the "political" in this strip? I'm not being centrist, just getting that this isn't about politics. It's about a rude, crude tiger dude declaring himself sovereign in the tree house. If this sets up complete mirth, it's worth it! (If not, I'll retract in frustration.)
Typical rebel-rouser trype response.
Seriously, where's the "political" in this strip? I'm not being centrist, just getting that this isn't about politics. It's about a rude, crude tiger dude declaring himself sovereign in the tree house. If this sets up complete mirth, it's worth it! (If not, I'll retract in frustration.)
tommythebrat
+0 -0
I was in fact being a typical rebel-rouser when I was calling you a centrist for no reason at all other than no one else uses it as an insult.
I was in fact being a typical rebel-rouser when I was calling you a centrist for no reason at all other than no one else uses it as an insult.
biff
+0 -1
Is "rebel-rouser" some kind of new term?
Back in the olden days, when I was in my 30s, the term was rabble -rouser.
I just don't get out so much any more.
Is "rebel-rouser" some kind of new term?
Back in the olden days, when I was in my 30s, the term was rabble -rouser.
I just don't get out so much any more.
mrwombat
+1 -0
You must be thinking of the Hamburglar.
You must be thinking of the Hamburglar.
tommythebrat
+0 -0
What does the hamburglar steal? Coz catburglars don't want to steal cats.
I always assumed that turdburglars stole things by sneaking through sewers.
What does the hamburglar steal? Coz catburglars don't want to steal cats.
I always assumed that turdburglars stole things by sneaking through sewers.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
So, who remembers that purple creature that McD's used before Barney cornered the whole "lame, purple, cuddley, annoying, stuffed thingie" rubric?
So, who remembers that purple creature that McD's used before Barney cornered the whole "lame, purple, cuddley, annoying, stuffed thingie" rubric?
tekende
+0 -0
You mean Grimace? What the fuck was that guy, anyway? He was a doofus, at any rate.
You mean Grimace? What the fuck was that guy, anyway? He was a doofus, at any rate.
woodenteeth
+3 -0
Some relation of the Tyranosauras judging by arm length... maybe missing a few chromosomes. Eating mainly berries.
Some relation of the Tyranosauras judging by arm length... maybe missing a few chromosomes. Eating mainly berries.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Yeah, Grimace. I always thought McD.'s could sue the snot out of Barney if they wanted to on that one. I mean, really.
Yeah, Grimace. I always thought McD.'s could sue the snot out of Barney if they wanted to on that one. I mean, really.
sje46
+0 -0
I was a big fan of both.
Is Barney still on, by the way?
I was a big fan of both.
Is Barney still on, by the way?
falseprophet
+0 -0
Yeah, he's still on. Everyday at 3:00 pm, right when school's out. He still sings songs about the importance of using your imagination, and they play games like...
Wait a minute...
Yeah, he's still on. Everyday at 3:00 pm, right when school's out. He still sings songs about the importance of using your imagination, and they play games like...
Wait a minute...
falseprophet
+3 -1
kamet
+1 -0
I think, this time.. it should say:
NOT FIVE
I think, this time.. it should say:
NOT FIVE
biff
+0 -0
Actually, Sid and Marty Kroft sued McDonald's (and won!) because of the ripoff H.R. Pufnstuf characters.
Actually, Sid and Marty Kroft sued McDonald's (and won!) because of the ripoff H.R. Pufnstuf characters.
biff
+1 -0
The Hamburglar is a very sad creature.
I try very hard not to think of him.
The Hamburglar is a very sad creature.
I try very hard not to think of him.
saulbellow
+0 -0
Stop it! >Sob< He's already dead!
Stop it! >Sob< He's already dead!
lechatbotte
+0 -0
I guess it just depends where ya' from!
I guess it just depends where ya' from!
stereo
+0 -0
Is there some kind of crazy story why the French quote things as <> and Germans do >>die quote<<
Is there some kind of crazy story why the French quote things as <
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Actually, in French "Romans" (Novels) the dialogue usually gets it's own line, like so:
--Alors, on pense que ca va aller?
--Oui. C'est deja fait. Nous allons devoir mieux faire dans l'avenir.
Les deux regardues d'une mannier imprecises.
Only when the quote is contained in a larger paragraph does it get "guillmets" (<< >>).
Not sure why the Germans got 'em backwards.
Actually, in French "Romans" (Novels) the dialogue usually gets it's own line, like so:
--Alors, on pense que ca va aller?
--Oui. C'est deja fait. Nous allons devoir mieux faire dans l'avenir.
Les deux regardues d'une mannier imprecises.
Only when the quote is contained in a larger paragraph does it get "guillmets" (<< >>).
Not sure why the Germans got 'em backwards.
sje46
+0 -0
--Do they do like Joyce asked sje inquiringly and not put the dashes before and after the speech attribute?
--Do they do like Joyce asked sje inquiringly and not put the dashes before and after the speech attribute?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
"Unless you count the water you're gonna break when you're givin' birth to my pain-child" is a serious contender with "taken to school in the bus of pain" for pain-related insult/threats.
Also, Loverboy the cross-eyed cockney skiffle mutt? HAAA HAAAA!
"Unless you count the water you're gonna break when you're givin' birth to my pain-child" is a serious contender with "taken to school in the bus of pain" for pain-related insult/threats.
Also, Loverboy the cross-eyed cockney skiffle mutt? HAAA HAAAA!
falseprophet
+0 -0
A love-child is what you get when you bone someone who barely know.
So I guess that means a pain-child is what you get when you finally have sex with your wife after a six-month hiatus.
A love-child is what you get when you bone someone who barely know.
So I guess that means a pain-child is what you get when you finally have sex with your wife after a six-month hiatus.
heccibiggs
+0 -0
The car of pain you IDIOT.
Other than that, I hella agree.
The car of pain you IDIOT.
Other than that, I hella agree.
aperson
+0 -0
Oh hee hee. You took that guy to prison in the car of pain.
Oh hee hee. You took that guy to prison in the car of pain.
invidious
+0 -0
I think I_Love_Kate's water just broke.
I think I_Love_Kate's water just broke.
i_love_kate
+2 -0
IT'S CROWNING
IT'S CROWNING
tekende
+0 -0
IS IT UGLY
IS IT UGLY
lateadopter
+0 -0
It's a dude named Napil.
It's a dude named Napil.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
hilarious.
hilarious.
heccibiggs
+1 -0
It's Kermit The Frog Master Memory Challenge! Happy birthday little dude!
It's Kermit The Frog Master Memory Challenge! Happy birthday little dude!
bizarro8mybaby
+1 -0
Lyle's flag is a shocker when flown upside down. As flags often are in his country. It is their way.
Lyle's flag is a shocker when flown upside down. As flags often are in his country. It is their way.
kamet
+2 -0
I hate Rush.
I hate Rush.
arcibi
+0 -0
I am tempted to lame you on principle for such a comment about one of my favorite bands
But instead I will let you off with a warning
This time
I am tempted to lame you on principle for such a comment about one of my favorite bands
But instead I will let you off with a warning
This time
kamet
+0 -0
Stating personal opinion regarding said band has naught to do with actual band suckiness...
I'm sorry you're upset that I think Rush sucks. There are support groups for these things.
Stating personal opinion regarding said band has naught to do with actual band suckiness...
I'm sorry you're upset that I think Rush sucks. There are support groups for these things.
aperson
+2 -0
Support group?
I dont care how good the support group is. If you dont like the main act, you dont go to the concert.
Now please press the red button.
Support group?
I dont care how good the support group is. If you dont like the main act, you dont go to the concert.
Now please press the red button.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
But what about the voice of Geddy Lee?
(I'msosorryIjustcouldn'thelpit)
But what about the voice of Geddy Lee?
(I'msosorryIjustcouldn'thelpit)
speccer
+0 -0
Neil Pert, play the drum solo of life!
Neil Pert, play the drum solo of life!
mattylite
+1 -0
...well I know him, and he does.
...well I know him, and he does.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Well, you skipped a few lines, but chubby anyways.
Well, you skipped a few lines, but chubby anyways.
aperson
+1 -0
Good fact checking there, f.o.s.
Good fact checking there, f.o.s.
riazm
+0 -0
Thanks for putting the reference in bold!
Thanks for putting the reference in bold!
awksedperl
+0 -0
You hate Georges St. Pierre? But that guy is *awesome*.
You hate Georges St. Pierre? But that guy is *awesome*.
falseprophet
+0 -0
His pussy's *so* *hot.*
His pussy's *so* *hot.*
awksedperl
+0 -0
Well, then, where's his Interweb movie?
Well, then, where's his Interweb movie?
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I find that the things that make a person most toughguy in real life, like knowing who GSP is, makes one look vastly nerdy in places like this. It is strange to know MMA things in here. You are a strange person.
(Don't tell but I have a crush on him too)
I find that the things that make a person most toughguy in real life, like knowing who GSP is, makes one look vastly nerdy in places like this. It is strange to know MMA things in here. You are a strange person.
(Don't tell but I have a crush on him too)
awksedperl
+0 -0
I don't know if I'm "toughguy", but I do like the MMA. Assetbar seemed like it could use a shoutout to GSP. And if I'm now regarded as strange here, let me go whole hog and mention that I know the difference between a gogoplata and a donkey punch, and that it's hard to believe that a skinny guy like Shinya Aoki can be such a badass.
Triangle CHOKE!
I don't know if I'm "toughguy", but I do like the MMA. Assetbar seemed like it could use a shoutout to GSP. And if I'm now regarded as strange here, let me go whole hog and mention that I know the difference between a gogoplata and a donkey punch, and that it's hard to believe that a skinny guy like Shinya Aoki can be such a badass.
Triangle CHOKE!
awksedperl
+0 -0
Oh, and should I change my handle to "mmanerd"?
Oh, and should I change my handle to "mmanerd"?
davey-boy
+0 -0
Could you have possibly meant 'rabbit punch'?
Could you have possibly meant 'rabbit punch'?
stereo
+0 -0
Is there some non-sexual meaning to donkey punch, or is MMA secretly about gay sex?
Is there some non-sexual meaning to donkey punch, or is MMA secretly about gay sex?
awksedperl
+0 -0
I meant "donkey punch". It's a reference to an commercial on an MMA radio show. I thought maybe hedonismbot would get it, and it would make me extra nerdy, and/or cool (but probably just nerdy).
But a lot of (straight) new MMA fans get uncomfortable when they first see the fight go to the ground where one man is in another man's jiu jitsu "guard". This is where one man lays on top of another with the bottom man's legs wrapped around the top man's hips/waist. Even after a few years of being a fan, sometimes when this happens I still hear in my head the voice of Cartman saying "I love you".
I meant "donkey punch". It's a reference to an commercial on an MMA radio show. I thought maybe hedonismbot would get it, and it would make me extra nerdy, and/or cool (but probably just nerdy).
But a lot of (straight) new MMA fans get uncomfortable when they first see the fight go to the ground where one man is in another man's jiu jitsu "guard". This is where one man lays on top of another with the bottom man's legs wrapped around the top man's hips/waist. Even after a few years of being a fan, sometimes when this happens I still hear in my head the voice of Cartman saying "I love you".
hedonismbot
+0 -0
One time I had mounted this guy from behind right? I pulled a rear naked on him, and was inches away from sinking it in and tapping him out. All of a sudden, he sprawls, flips, and puts a rubber guard on me. Before I know it, my face is deep in his thighs and we twist into a triangle. I was SO close to finishing him off.
"It's only gay if you push back into him"
One time I had mounted this guy from behind right? I pulled a rear naked on him, and was inches away from sinking it in and tapping him out. All of a sudden, he sprawls, flips, and puts a rubber guard on me. Before I know it, my face is deep in his thighs and we twist into a triangle. I was SO close to finishing him off.
"It's only gay if you push back into him"
pogo
+0 -0
This is about Greco-Roman wrestling, right?
This is about Greco-Roman wrestling, right?
redphillip
+0 -0
Only if you want it to be .
Only if you want it to be .
awksedperl
+0 -0
Look, hedonismbot, if you can't make BJJ sound gay, you really shouldn't try.
Look, hedonismbot, if you can't make BJJ sound gay, you really shouldn't try.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
If what I wrote didn't sound gay to you, then you are already past the point of no return
If what I wrote didn't sound gay to you, then you are already past the point of no return
awksedperl
+0 -0
OK hedonismbot, after these many days I'll admit it-there's a chance that I was being ironic in my last reply to you.
OK hedonismbot, after these many days I'll admit it-there's a chance that I was being ironic in my last reply to you.
kamet
+2 -0
You two are so gay for each other.
You two are so gay for each other.
awksedperl
+1 -0
[LATENTFRATGUY]Uh, right, dude. Like I'm gay for hedonismbot. More like dude I'm so gay for my girlfriend, and her girlfriend. Bro, and totally her girlfriend's hot girlfriend, who I regularly bang all at once at my apartment which is a total Gay-Free Zone, brodude. Not that gays wouldn't be welcome at my place, but they wouldn't be comfortable around my total, concentrated, heterosexual and not gay at all manliness and manositude. Even when I say "bros before hoes", I only mean it like in the way that makes my bros totally straight and I'm only with them if there are hoes, hoes after my totally straight junk, and I've even never seen my bros naked and glistening, so shut up. So I'm totally straight. Porks the ladies. Eschews the dong. 'Cept for mine, 'cause it's *awesome*. But not in a gay way. At all. I hope that clears things up. Bro.[/LATENTFRATGUY]
[LATENTFRATGUY]Uh, right, dude. Like I'm gay for hedonismbot. More like dude I'm so gay for my girlfriend, and her girlfriend. Bro, and totally her girlfriend's hot girlfriend, who I regularly bang all at once at my apartment which is a total Gay-Free Zone, brodude. Not that gays wouldn't be welcome at my place, but they wouldn't be comfortable around my total, concentrated, heterosexual and not gay at all manliness and manositude. Even when I say "bros before hoes", I only mean it like in the way that makes my bros totally straight and I'm only with them if there are hoes, hoes after my totally straight junk, and I've even never seen my bros naked and glistening, so shut up. So I'm totally straight. Porks the ladies. Eschews the dong. 'Cept for mine, 'cause it's *awesome*. But not in a gay way. At all. I hope that clears things up. Bro.[/LATENTFRATGUY]
achilleselbow
+0 -0
My roommate does MMA. I went to one of his fights and watched him writhe around on the floor with like 3 different dudes. I even held his towel so he could clean up afterwards. It was good times.
My roommate does MMA. I went to one of his fights and watched him writhe around on the floor with like 3 different dudes. I even held his towel so he could clean up afterwards. It was good times.
seymourglass
+0 -0
Why not Adelaide, indeed.
Could Chris Onstad listen to Ben Folds?
Why not Adelaide, indeed.
Could Chris Onstad listen to Ben Folds?
farqussus
+0 -0
Even people from Adelaide know why not Adelaide.
Even people from Adelaide know why not Adelaide.
awko
+0 -0
Adelaide is for old people and churches.
Adelaide is for old people and churches.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Radelaide .
No, seriously. Good funk bands though... everywhere last time I was there, really bizarre.
Radelaide .
No, seriously. Good funk bands though... everywhere last time I was there, really bizarre.
farqussus
+0 -0
The term good funk band is an oxymoron.
The term good funk band is an oxymoron.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Autechre ARE a great funk band farqussus. Don't be so down on yourself.
ie. The idea of looping rhythms to create a crazy groove and maybe some syncopation in there is a funk concept and you can't argue because you would be wrong.
I am OK with being wrong.
Autechre ARE a great funk band farqussus. Don't be so down on yourself.
ie. The idea of looping rhythms to create a crazy groove and maybe some syncopation in there is a funk concept and you can't argue because you would be wrong.
I am OK with being wrong.
farqussus
+0 -0
While what Autechre creates could occasionally be loosely interpreted as 'funky', what you are saying is like saying Sade is a rock band because one of her songs features a guitar and drums.
While what Autechre creates could occasionally be loosely interpreted as 'funky', what you are saying is like saying Sade is a rock band because one of her songs features a guitar and drums.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I understood the flaming holes in my argument. Basically so bad you could warm your hands by them. Still. Our opinions on funk differ. That was my point.
I understood the flaming holes in my argument. Basically so bad you could warm your hands by them. Still. Our opinions on funk differ. That was my point.
mustakrakesh
+0 -0
I too am glad that Martin Short is not on a coin...
I was told there would be LaBatt Blue? Am I too late?
I too am glad that Martin Short is not on a coin...
I was told there would be LaBatt Blue? Am I too late?
sje46
+0 -0
Lachatbotte blue?
Lachatbotte blue?
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Yeah. That's the "non-alcohol" kind they sell at underage parties. It's basically cat piss filtered through an army boot.
Yeah. That's the "non-alcohol" kind they sell at underage parties. It's basically cat piss filtered through an army boot.
mustakrakesh
+0 -0
I'm a glutton for punishment I guess, wanna come over to my house and do shots of vinegar?
I'm a glutton for punishment I guess, wanna come over to my house and do shots of vinegar?
tad-
+0 -0
This may be a set up for something funny, but the bad jokes about Canada isn't helping its cause.
This may be a set up for something funny, but the bad jokes about Canada isn't helping its cause.
usversusthem
+0 -0
Yeah! What's with that! We have a way better electoral system and everything!
( Ed.'s note: This is true, though. )
Yeah! What's with that! We have a way better electoral system and everything!
( Ed.'s note: This is true, though. )
stereo
+0 -0
Not that it's good or something...
All you guys who voted against proportional representation can apologize as soon as convenient
Not that it's good or something...
All you guys who voted against proportional representation can apologize as soon as convenient
mustakrakesh
+0 -0
Personally I thought that all of that land to the north of New York was for parking.
Personally I thought that all of that land to the north of New York was for parking.
coldfrog
+0 -0
oh my GOD tad I don't need therapy anymore
oh my GOD tad I don't need therapy anymore
agentstinky
+0 -0
yes it's obviously a middle finger
yes it's obviously a middle finger
desert_donkey
+0 -0
A comment left by desert_donkey was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by snidedk, prius_chaser, sje46, brycemidas)
A comment left by desert_donkey was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by snidedk, prius_chaser, sje46, brycemidas)
sje46
+1 -1
I don't like you.
I don't like you.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
A comment left by desert_donkey was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by KaMeT, snidedk, prius_chaser, nerdinexile, Lumus, sje46)
A comment left by desert_donkey was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by KaMeT, snidedk, prius_chaser, nerdinexile, Lumus, sje46)
nice-on-water
+0 -1
OH MY GOD
OH MY GOD
nerdinexile
+2 -1
Douche bag, you ass .
(before you lame me, that's meant to be a pun on his handle. okay, now lame me)
Douche bag, you ass .
(before you lame me, that's meant to be a pun on his handle. okay, now lame me)
woodenteeth
+0 -1
One, Two, Three... IGNORE! Hedonsimbot, I can finally hear the wind, sweet silent wind.
One, Two, Three... IGNORE! Hedonsimbot, I can finally hear the wind, sweet silent wind.
hedonismbot
+0 -1
It's so nice to gaze at a page with like, 7 posts. I ignore like a fiend now, and will never look back. My ignore list is as long as my, uh, it's really long. Everyone who bugs me even once. I even had lechbot on there for a bit, then I realized he just posted a lot and never actually bothered me, so I took him off.
Donkey up there got his position on the list during the Carter Administration.
It's so nice to gaze at a page with like, 7 posts. I ignore like a fiend now, and will never look back. My ignore list is as long as my, uh, it's really long. Everyone who bugs me even once. I even had lechbot on there for a bit, then I realized he just posted a lot and never actually bothered me, so I took him off.
Donkey up there got his position on the list during the Carter Administration.
woodenteeth
+0 -1
Who up where? I see nothing.
Who up where? I see nothing.
randombeing
+0 -0
Rain! Onstad is so painfully left-coast that it hurts my heart.
Rain! Onstad is so painfully left-coast that it hurts my heart.
vermy
+0 -0
Teodor is an asshole this week
Teodor is an asshole this week
tripleg
+0 -0
i would be an asshole, too, if someone forced me into maximum friendship in such a way as ray did
i would be an asshole, too, if someone forced me into maximum friendship in such a way as ray did
vermy
+0 -0
... he hasn't encountered Ray at all this week
... he hasn't encountered Ray at all this week
tripleg
+0 -0
ah, but last week he was forced to participate in ray's encountering of a new and perverse sex act over the phone.
ah, but last week he was forced to participate in ray's encountering of a new and perverse sex act over the phone.
joeynarcotic
+0 -0
I used to like Teodor, but now I think he's a cunt. What should I do?
I used to like Teodor, but now I think he's a cunt. What should I do?
aperson
+1 -0
> Bugger that opinion.
> Bugger that opinion.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Re-direct you anger at Pat.
(Maybe Teodor is the new Pat?)
Re-direct you anger at Pat.
(Maybe Teodor is the new Pat?)
stereo
+0 -0
Yeah, I'm really not liking this whole "cares about Philippe or going to prison" side of him. Hell he used to punch Philippe for Christmas.
Yeah, I'm really not liking this whole "cares about Philippe or going to prison" side of him. Hell he used to punch Philippe for Christmas.
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Maybe there was an arrest and trial that we didn't hear about after that, and it's got him all kinda cautious now.
Maybe there was an arrest and trial that we didn't hear about after that, and it's got him all kinda cautious now.
nokidding
+0 -1
Canada does not have state functions at which moose can legally eat the microphones because canada does not have states.
Canada does not have state functions at which moose can legally eat the microphones because canada does not have states.
mrwombat
+0 -0
Canada does have states, and also state functions, which are not necessarily related to states as you mean them. States are a thing of their own, they do not belong to the US.
Canada does have states, and also state functions, which are not necessarily related to states as you mean them. States are a thing of their own, they do not belong to the US.
saulbellow
+0 -0
Arguing for the proposition "Resolved: States are a thing of their own" is Mr. Wombat.
Arguing for the proposition "Resolved: States are a thing of their own" is Mr. Wombat.
irondave
+0 -0
Canada IS a state. It has no States, that I know of.
Canada IS a state. It has no States, that I know of.
aperson
+0 -0
Yeah, it's got Provinces hasn't it?
Yeah, it's got Provinces hasn't it?
irondave
+0 -0
Yeah, and I think there are still the two Territories, also. I don't know what Nunavut is, I think it's considered an independent nation-state now. I can't be arsed to look it up.
(Did I say that last part right?)
Yeah, and I think there are still the two Territories, also. I don't know what Nunavut is, I think it's considered an independent nation-state now. I can't be arsed to look it up.
(Did I say that last part right?)
aperson
+0 -0
Absolutely fandabbydosey.
Absolutely fandabbydosey.
randombeing
+0 -1
Nunavut is a territory. "Independent nation-state?" Good lord. I thought only Americans were clueless about this sort of thing. (We have a lot of rain in Canada! Ask Onstad! He lives south of BC!)
Nunavut is a territory. "Independent nation-state?" Good lord. I thought only Americans were clueless about this sort of thing. (We have a lot of rain in Canada! Ask Onstad! He lives south of BC!)
randombeing
+0 -0
Is Northampton still a part of the UK or has it seceded entirely? I simply cannot recall.
Is Northampton still a part of the UK or has it seceded entirely? I simply cannot recall.
aperson
+0 -1
Irondave is not British, twat.
Irondave is not British, twat.
randombeing
+0 -0
Puerto Rico is the 51st state, I think.
Puerto Rico is the 51st state, I think.
uforgotpoland
+1 -0
Nah, I'm pretty sure that's Canada.
Nah, I'm pretty sure that's Canada.
sje46
+0 -0
What about Tibet?
What about Tibet?
aperson
+1 -0
What about Tibet.
What about Tibet.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
It can't be the 51st state there's no Oil there! Silly.
It can't be the 51st state there's no Oil there! Silly.
sje46
+0 -0
But it has half of Mt. Everest!
But it has half of Mt. Everest!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
that's a lot of ice to drill through to find oil.
...but they said the same thing about Alaska.
that's a lot of ice to drill through to find oil.
...but they said the same thing about Alaska.
sje46
+4 -0
How can Alaska have ice?
I thought it was right next to Hawaii.
See?
How can Alaska have ice?
I thought it was right next to Hawaii.
See?
irondave
+0 -0
I once heard a story of a logistics clerk who routed a shipment coming from Alaska through Dallas (instead of say, Seattle) because on his map, Dallas was the closest major airport.
I once heard a story of a logistics clerk who routed a shipment coming from Alaska through Dallas (instead of say, Seattle) because on his map, Dallas was the closest major airport.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Oh my, Assetbar Philippe, are you United States Geography Philippe now, too?
Is that your secret identity, little guy?
Oh my, Assetbar Philippe, are you United States Geography Philippe now, too?
Is that your secret identity, little guy?
sje46
+0 -0
=]
I actually did quite well in the New Hampshire National Geographic Bee.
=]
I actually did quite well in the New Hampshire National Geographic Bee.
sje46
+0 -0
I like how the picture turns green when the comment turns green.
I like how the picture turns green when the comment turns green.
hedonismbot
+2 -0
I'm with Dave here. I cannot be arsed to look up the political status of a stretch of land with 14 burly men on it.
I'm with Dave here. I cannot be arsed to look up the political status of a stretch of land with 14 burly men on it.
mattylite
+0 -0
Canada is a state of mind.
Canada is a state of mind.
c_dizzle
+0 -0
This is certainly distressing I mus' saaay.
This is certainly distressing I mus' saaay.
asherdan
+1 -1
If Lyle ever names his country that flag could make 'Stad a mighty fine shirt to take to market.
I'm just sayin' Lyle Merch has been a bit short in the store, y'know.
If Lyle ever names his country that flag could make 'Stad a mighty fine shirt to take to market.
I'm just sayin' Lyle Merch has been a bit short in the store, y'know.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
"Holemania". The fanclub for hole men, by hole men
"Holemania". The fanclub for hole men, by hole men
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Holemania sounds pretty inclusive. Are all orifii fetishes catered for?
Oh la la la etc.
Holemania sounds pretty inclusive. Are all orifii fetishes catered for?
Oh la la la etc.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
We've got an opening (pun) for a new vice president of stomas if you are looking for a good position
We've got an opening (pun) for a new vice president of stomas if you are looking for a good position
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Well it seems the whole vice presidency is considered a fairly mindless position, so this is attractive to me.
Well it seems the whole vice presidency is considered a fairly mindless position, so this is attractive to me.
tekende
+0 -0
{Insert joke about an attractive position for Sarah Palin}
{Insert joke about an attractive position for Sarah Palin}
tripleg
+0 -0
if she gets elected, it will almost certainly be a missionary's position?
{/joke insertion}
if she gets elected, it will almost certainly be a missionary's position?
{/joke insertion}
farqussus
+0 -0
/insertion
/insertion
joestork
+0 -0
Asherdan!
Asherdan!
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Don't make loud noises, you'll scare it off.
Don't make loud noises, you'll scare it off.
sje46
+0 -0
It's a solitary creature, you see.
It's a solitary creature, you see.
possums
+0 -0
So I don't know if this is a good place to ask this or not, but:
Who else is going to Onstad's Portland signings? I'm hitting the Thursday signing at Floating World for sure, but I'm 50/50 on the tattoo parlor on Friday. If more people are going to that though, I will go for sure...
So I don't know if this is a good place to ask this or not, but:
Who else is going to Onstad's Portland signings? I'm hitting the Thursday signing at Floating World for sure, but I'm 50/50 on the tattoo parlor on Friday. If more people are going to that though, I will go for sure...
ashoykh
+0 -0
A comment left by ashoykh was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by joeynarcotic, falseprophet, fattypneumonia)
A comment left by ashoykh was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by joeynarcotic, falseprophet, fattypneumonia)
saulbellow
+0 -0
Dude this is so huge - I mean awesome
Dude this is so huge - I mean awesome
pursesnatcher
+0 -0
turns out my monitor is at 1920 x 1200 resolution....
turns out my monitor is at 1920 x 1200 resolution....
pursesnatcher
+0 -0
which is why i can see this gem
which is why i can see this gem
tekende
+0 -0
That's
That's
tekende
+0 -0
cool
cool
mercuri0us
+0 -0
That's the best two-part comment I think I have ever seen.
That's the best two-part comment I think I have ever seen.
possums
+0 -0
what's the difference
what's the difference
ashoykh
+0 -0
i had a nightmare last night about my post. In the nightmare, there was a special tag invented called the [SCYN] tag which, when used by a subsequent poster, would cause all of the ire of the achewood community to focus on my post and lame it into oblivion.
somebody used the tag, and my post disappeared...
then, to taunt me some more, someone replied to my post by posting an even LARGER gif file composed of very long slanting lines going from the bottom left of the screen to the upper right of the screen...
i drank a pitcher of beer before I went to sleep..not sure if these things are related
i had a nightmare last night about my post. In the nightmare, there was a special tag invented called the [SCYN] tag which, when used by a subsequent poster, would cause all of the ire of the achewood community to focus on my post and lame it into oblivion.
somebody used the tag, and my post disappeared...
then, to taunt me some more, someone replied to my post by posting an even LARGER gif file composed of very long slanting lines going from the bottom left of the screen to the upper right of the screen...
i drank a pitcher of beer before I went to sleep..not sure if these things are related
saulbellow
+1 -0
[SCYN]ashoykh[/SCYN]
[SCYN]ashoykh[/SCYN]
ashoykh
+0 -0
damn! saul bellow, I thought we were cool! Is this because you're from Canadia?
damn! saul bellow, I thought we were cool! Is this because you're from Canadia?
awksedperl
+0 -0
Very nice, though it's a "Doomsday device". Unless you mean that Smuckles will be moving to Lylelandia, and become the device, in which case it's *even more awesome*.
Very nice, though it's a "Doomsday device". Unless you mean that Smuckles will be moving to Lylelandia, and become the device, in which case it's *even more awesome*.
aunthemod
+0 -0
Damn whats up with the whole Lyle-Philippe thing? Lie Bot-Philippe is so much better!
Damn whats up with the whole Lyle-Philippe thing? Lie Bot-Philippe is so much better!
aunthemod
+0 -0
who am I kidding... I just want more lie bot in everything.
who am I kidding... I just want more lie bot in everything.
invidious
+0 -0
Lyle actually has a long and illustrious history of influencing Philippe:
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua2z1bcB
Lyle actually has a long and illustrious history of influencing Philippe:
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua2z1bcB
ryaldin
+2 -0
I get this worried feeling when I see Lyle spending so much of his [seemingly endless] free time with Philippe. Not worried in the 'dirty-old-tiger-with-a-molestache' type of worried, but more of the gut dropping sense of concern warranted by seeing a man with case of fresca, happily sitting on his front porch, tapping on a blockbuster bomb with a brick from his garden.
I get this worried feeling when I see Lyle spending so much of his [seemingly endless] free time with Philippe. Not worried in the 'dirty-old-tiger-with-a-molestache' type of worried, but more of the gut dropping sense of concern warranted by seeing a man with case of fresca, happily sitting on his front porch, tapping on a blockbuster bomb with a brick from his garden.
fuckyoufriday
+0 -0
is the flag an abstract Black Flag reference?
is the flag an abstract Black Flag reference?
fuckyoufriday
+1 -0
why don't you read the posts before sounding off, numbskull? now we both look stupid!
why don't you read the posts before sounding off, numbskull? now we both look stupid!
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Why don't you just leave him alone, it was an innocent enough mistake.
Why don't you just leave him alone, it was an innocent enough mistake.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Oh, shut the fuck up you bleeding heart.
Oh, shut the fuck up you bleeding heart.
hamscout
+0 -0
Hey, I'm offended by that! Just because someone doesn't have the same political views as you...
Hey, I'm offended by that! Just because someone doesn't have the same political views as you...
hamscout
+1 -0
Oh, just shut up with your damn political views! You're probably the reason loneal left... ass!
Oh, just shut up with your damn political views! You're probably the reason loneal left... ass!
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Is there a psychologist in the house? Multiple personality disorder is not a laughing matter. I am ashamed that you all make so light of it. Shame, shame, shame!
Is there a psychologist in the house? Multiple personality disorder is not a laughing matter. I am ashamed that you all make so light of it. Shame, shame, shame!
lechatbotte
+0 -0
Oh, shut the fuck up, you P.C. biatch drone!
(Hey, Hedo, is it really rape if any one of the personalities goes along with it?)
Oh, shut the fuck up, you P.C. biatch drone!
(Hey, Hedo, is it really rape if any one of the personalities goes along with it?)
pogo
+0 -0
So, we get to slam ourselves out of nowhere?
So, we get to slam ourselves out of nowhere?
pogo
+0 -0
Watch out, bitch, or you'll be blinsided by yourself!
Watch out, bitch, or you'll be blinsided by yourself!
stereo
+0 -0
Arguments!
Arguments!
stereo
+0 -0
In!
In!
stereo
+0 -0
stereo
+1 -0
Why would you do such a stupid thing?
Why would you do such a stupid thing?
sje46
+0 -0
Please stop the anger guys!
We need love!
Please stop the anger guys!
We need love!
sje46
+0 -0
*hugs!*
*hugs!*
falseprophet
+0 -0
Man, white people are just plain crazy.
Man, white people are just plain crazy.
falseprophet
+3 -0
Damn right.
Damn right.
rowboat
+0 -0
Hey Dude, um, you should probably go back to school and quit smoking so many damn drugs. And stop yelling at strangers just 'cause they can't drive proper. I mean, they're probably decent or at least harmless. Think about it.
Hey Dude, um, you should probably go back to school and quit smoking so many damn drugs. And stop yelling at strangers just 'cause they can't drive proper. I mean, they're probably decent or at least harmless. Think about it.
rowboat
+1 -0
GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME WITH THAT NEEDLE GOD DAMN YOU NO NO NO NO PLEASE DON'T PUT ME BACK IN THE DARK WATER I'LL BE GOOD NO STOP GET AWAY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME WITH THAT NEEDLE GOD DAMN YOU NO NO NO NO PLEASE DON'T PUT ME BACK IN THE DARK WATER I'LL BE GOOD NO STOP GET AWAY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Hi
Hi
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Yes
Yes
farqussus
+0 -0
sarcasm
sarcasm
farqussus
+0 -0
loathing
loathing
baryonyx
+1 -0
Hmmm. I'm not really sure if I should get in on this thread.
Hmmm. I'm not really sure if I should get in on this thread.
baryonyx
+1 -0
Do it, man. I did, and it ruled.
Do it, man. I did, and it ruled.
niggar
+0 -0
A comment left by niggar was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by KaMeT, snidedk, prius_chaser, tripleG, sje46)
A comment left by niggar was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by KaMeT, snidedk, prius_chaser, tripleG, sje46)
woodenteeth
+1 -0
Well argued.
Well argued.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Panels one and two; Teodor's legs, or some manner of chin rest?
Panels one and two; Teodor's legs, or some manner of chin rest?
qingofchina
+0 -0
They are acutally his extra-comfy pillow pants.
They are acutally his extra-comfy pillow pants.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Yeah, but look at the knees, how they dangle next to Lyle's stubby legs that do not reach the end of the Chesterfield.
Yeah, but look at the knees, how they dangle next to Lyle's stubby legs that do not reach the end of the Chesterfield.
red-barchetta
+0 -0
As a Canadian, I can tell you that the Wiki article info is accurate but we no longer allow the moose into state functions due to the rising cost of microphones.
As a Canadian, I can tell you that the Wiki article info is accurate but we no longer allow the moose into state functions due to the rising cost of microphones.
davey-boy
+0 -0
This has caused some problems, as the positions of Governor General and the Tory party whip are traditionally filled by moose.
This has caused some problems, as the positions of Governor General and the Tory party whip are traditionally filled by moose.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
Your sister was filled by a moose
Your sister was filled by a moose
davey-boy
+2 -0
Could have been worse. Could have been a swill-mouthed Okie.
Could have been worse. Could have been a swill-mouthed Okie.
lateadopter
+0 -0
HUGE slam on hedonismbot out of ... well, not nowhere. He had that coming to him.
HUGE slam on hedonismbot out of ... well, not nowhere. He had that coming to him.
davey-boy
+2 -0
Not out of nowhere, really. I had a bad expierience with an Okie one time.
A while back, I stop off at my bar, and notice a guy I don't recognise in the front. I sit down next to him, and mind my drinking for a bit, and watch the game, (I believe it was the Edmonton Rush versus the San Jose Stealth).
After a couple of mutual cheers and groans at the proceedings, I felt enough symbiotic aquaintence with the guy to shake his hand and introduce myself. He said he was from Oklahoma, just passing through for a while to see a relative. We get to talking for a bit and our conversation drifts from lacrosse to his dissatisfaction with his wife and kids, and while I now realize in rhetrospect that it was a huge presumption on my part, I had enough drink in me to ask him if he wanted to go into the mens room for a blow job.
The son of a bitch punches me right off of my bar stool!
As I am lying there, trying to get my wits about me, I hear the bartender ask the dude "Jesus guy! What did he say to you?"
"I don't know. Something about a job."
Not out of nowhere, really. I had a bad expierience with an Okie one time.
A while back, I stop off at my bar, and notice a guy I don't recognise in the front. I sit down next to him, and mind my drinking for a bit, and watch the game, (I believe it was the Edmonton Rush versus the San Jose Stealth).
After a couple of mutual cheers and groans at the proceedings, I felt enough symbiotic aquaintence with the guy to shake his hand and introduce myself. He said he was from Oklahoma, just passing through for a while to see a relative. We get to talking for a bit and our conversation drifts from lacrosse to his dissatisfaction with his wife and kids, and while I now realize in rhetrospect that it was a huge presumption on my part, I had enough drink in me to ask him if he wanted to go into the mens room for a blow job.
The son of a bitch punches me right off of my bar stool!
As I am lying there, trying to get my wits about me, I hear the bartender ask the dude "Jesus guy! What did he say to you?"
"I don't know. Something about a job."
irondave
+0 -0
Wow, what a blast from the past.
Wow, what a blast from the past.
sje46
+0 -2
Guys!
Guess what!
(!!!)
It's Hug Day!!
*Hugs for all!*
I love you, friends!
Guys!
Guess what!
(!!!)
It's Hug Day!!
*Hugs for all!*
I love you, friends!
catgrl131
+1 -0
Yay!!!! Hugs for everyone!
Yay!!!! Hugs for everyone!
sje46
+0 -0
You get a chubby for hugging me!
You get a chubby for hugging me!
tripleg
+0 -0
oh phillipe
oh phillipe
sje46
+0 -0
Yes?
Yes?
tripleg
+0 -0
v-chub
v-chub
mrchee
+0 -0
Christ Onstad you have sold out completely.
You have made Lyle politically aware.
Christ Onstad you have sold out completely.
You have made Lyle politically aware.
stereo
+0 -0
Yes, being aware that there are politicians on TV who act like clowns is selling out.
Or are there a bunch of politicians not acting like clowns that I missed somewhere?
Yes, being aware that there are politicians on TV who act like clowns is selling out.
Or are there a bunch of politicians not acting like clowns that I missed somewhere?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
like it ain't happened already...
like it ain't happened already...
pogo
+0 -0
Monday?! Strip resumes Monday !?? What the flock? This does not fit the needs of Assetbarbarians at all. Oh well, with the new Inbox feature, we can wander the archives at will.
Monday?! Strip resumes Monday !?? What the flock? This does not fit the needs of Assetbarbarians at all. Oh well, with the new Inbox feature, we can wander the archives at will.
uforgotpoland
+1 -0
Okay. Strip Invasion!!!!
SUCCESS!
SUCCESS!!
SUCCESS!!!
SUCCESS!!!!
Okay. Strip Invasion!!!!
SUCCESS!
SUCCESS!!
SUCCESS!!!
SUCCESS!!!!
sje46
+1 -1
That was skills that kills right there.
Skills that [i]kills [/i[
That was skills that kills right there.
Skills that [i]kills [/i[
mrchee
+0 -1
your post certainly wasn't
your post certainly wasn't
sje46
+0 -1
Neither was your post.
Neither was your post.
farqussus
+1 -0
neither was YOUR post
neither was YOUR post
farqussus
+0 -0
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSss
sje46
+0 -0
Well, neither is your post!!!!
(Yeah, I said it!!)
Well, neither is your post!!!!
(Yeah, I said it!!)
lechatbotte
+0 -0
You're all a bunch of lamos!
You're all a bunch of lamos!
lechatbotte
+0 -0
(Neither was that post!)
(Neither was that post!)
i_love_kate
+0 -1
I say we all go have a party on 02/18/2004!
I say we all go have a party on 02/18/2004!
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
Oh, I see. The old "invite Cindy to a party and then not be there when she shows up" trick.
It's like my bat mitzvah all over again.
Oh, I see. The old "invite Cindy to a party and then not be there when she shows up" trick.
It's like my bat mitzvah all over again.
falseprophet
+1 -0
My parents told me they were throwing a bar mitzvah for me but when I showed up, the only person there was my naked uncle and he was all "We ain't Jewish kid; eat the pork."
My parents told me they were throwing a bar mitzvah for me but when I showed up, the only person there was my naked uncle and he was all "We ain't Jewish kid; eat the pork."
sje46
+0 -0
So you're not Lenny Kravitz.
So you're not Lenny Kravitz.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Pedophilia; Rough. Chuckles.
Pedophilia; Rough. Chuckles.
ellameno
+2 -0
"Son, I know this might be a tough thing for you to discuss, but the court needs you to be brave. Could you please tell the nice men and ladies in the jury, how long has your uncle been... knowing you, in the Biblical sense?"
"I HAVE BEEN KNOWN SINCE I WAS 12"
"Son, I know this might be a tough thing for you to discuss, but the court needs you to be brave. Could you please tell the nice men and ladies in the jury, how long has your uncle been... knowing you, in the Biblical sense?"
"I HAVE BEEN KNOWN SINCE I WAS 12"
falseprophet
+0 -0
"I AM THE LAW AND THE LASH"
"I AM THE LAW AND THE LASH"
evilaz
+0 -0
Lyle's countries flag is almost like the Black Flag logo. Lyle must be the most punk rock dude ever.
Lyle's countries flag is almost like the Black Flag logo. Lyle must be the most punk rock dude ever.
operamindcrime
+0 -0
how does this strip not have a higher rating
i mean, how
we have that wikipedia entry AND teodor giving birth to lyle's pain-child
how does this strip not have a higher rating
i mean, how
we have that wikipedia entry AND teodor giving birth to lyle's pain-child
persiascarecrow
+0 -0
True that Teodor.
True that Teodor.
ellameno
+0 -0
Panel 3 is just so unnecessarily intense. It's almost like a Tim & Eric sketch. You can decide for yourself if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
Panel 3 is just so unnecessarily intense. It's almost like a Tim & Eric sketch. You can decide for yourself if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Any Sydney kids in the house? I would find it interesting to know how many Sydneysiders are into Achewood. I've never met any...
I know. Lame. I'm still curious. You can't take THAT away from me.
Any Sydney kids in the house? I would find it interesting to know how many Sydneysiders are into Achewood. I've never met any...
I know. Lame. I'm still curious. You can't take THAT away from me.
possums
+9 -0
I got Onstad to write a haiku.
I got Onstad to write a haiku.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Was he counting syllables on his hand while he was composing?
Because I do that
Whenever I am trying
To write a haiku.
Was he counting syllables on his hand while he was composing?
Because I do that
Whenever I am trying
To write a haiku.
possums
+0 -0
yes it was hilarious in the main
yes it was hilarious in the main
woodenteeth
+0 -0
His Beloved Strip? Your beloved strip possums, or Onstad's?
His Beloved Strip? Your beloved strip possums, or Onstad's?
possums
+0 -0
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
sje46
+0 -0
O RLY?
O RLY?
possums
+0 -0
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
sje46
+0 -0
On what?
On what?
possums
+0 -0
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
sje46
+0 -0
Whose strips?
Whose strips?
possums
+0 -0
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
OK! OK! I get the point.
I took "my beloved strip" as a reference to a story you told him of your favourite strip being voted low... or the other possibility of HIS favourite strip being voted low.
Either way, I'd like to know the answer to this question and which strip it was...
OK! OK! I get the point.
I took "my beloved strip" as a reference to a story you told him of your favourite strip being voted low... or the other possibility of HIS favourite strip being voted low.
Either way, I'd like to know the answer to this question and which strip it was...
possums
+0 -0
holy fuck why did that post four times. my computer sucks.
he said he loves mostly all the ones that get low ratings, and I'm inclined to agree. the one I thought of was this one and PEE PEE NYMPHO TEENS HAVE MORTGAGED IT ALL
holy fuck why did that post four times. my computer sucks.
he said he loves mostly all the ones that get low ratings, and I'm inclined to agree. the one I thought of was this one and PEE PEE NYMPHO TEENS HAVE MORTGAGED IT ALL
davey-boy
+0 -0
A little hint might be that this strip is currently rated a 3.7.
A little hint might be that this strip is currently rated a 3.7.
sje46
+0 -0
Okay. Got it.
Okay. Got it.
lechatbotte
+0 -2
Not five, not seven,
But only four times posted:
Not good Haiku form.
Not five, not seven,
But only four times posted:
Not good Haiku form.
catgrl131
+0 -0
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
i certainly don't have my strips up on assetbar.
pogo
+0 -0
(Fighting the urge to encourage stripping on Assetbar)
(Fighting the urge to encourage stripping on Assetbar)
catgrl131
+3 -0
Hey, why not?
Hey, why not?
baryonyx
+1 -0
Unnecessary. Also, lewd. I look at that adhesive strip being pulled away, and I just see desperation and the stunted morals and values of our society.
Unnecessary. Also, lewd. I look at that adhesive strip being pulled away, and I just see desperation and the stunted morals and values of our society.
stereo
+0 -0
Stripping is environmentally sound , man! Don't you love the environment?
Stripping is environmentally sound , man! Don't you love the environment?
baryonyx
+0 -0
Not at the cost of such abominations as portisexuality .
Not at the cost of such abominations as portisexuality .
mattylite
+0 -0
No, I can't define portisexuality per se, but I know it when I see it.
No, I can't define portisexuality per se, but I know it when I see it.
speccer
+0 -0
PORTILINGUS. NOUN. MEANS, OPENING A DOOR WITH YOUR MOUTH.
PORTILINGUS. NOUN. MEANS, OPENING A DOOR WITH YOUR MOUTH.
redphillip
+0 -0
Peelin' it, pullin' it down real slow, leanin' in to hear that sweet ssssst of the adhesive tryin' to hold on to the paper. Oh, god! Stick it! Stick it! Stick it hard up on that molding!
Peelin' it, pullin' it down real slow, leanin' in to hear that sweet ssssst of the adhesive tryin' to hold on to the paper. Oh, god! Stick it! Stick it! Stick it hard up on that molding!
tellumo
+0 -0
oh hilarious
whoa dude you are the limit
and plus Philippe rules
oh hilarious
whoa dude you are the limit
and plus Philippe rules
akumitsukai
+0 -0
i maek post
i maek post
theguitarhero
+0 -0
LOL.
LOL.
sje46
+0 -0
LOL WUT
LOL WUT
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
heh! what?
heh! what?
jonathan3584
+1 -0
I hate to bash Achewood, as any example of it is clearly superior to anything that ever fell under the gaze of syndication, but this has the ring of every toothless election cartoon ever -- "If those guys win" -- ya know, that crazy party that you disagree with, reader...
I hate to bash Achewood, as any example of it is clearly superior to anything that ever fell under the gaze of syndication, but this has the ring of every toothless election cartoon ever -- "If those guys win" -- ya know, that crazy party that you disagree with, reader...
rowboat
+0 -0
I hate your opinion.
I hate your opinion.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Your opinion is a toothless whore.
Your opinion is a toothless whore.
dangermusic
+1 -0
Canada tops list of world's best banking systems
According to executives surveyed for the World Economic Forum's Global Competitiveness Index, the following countries have the world's soundest banking systems:
1. Canada
2. Sweden
3. Luxembourg
4. Australia
The United States ranks 40th, behind Germany and Namibia.
Canada tops list of world's best banking systems
According to executives surveyed for the World Economic Forum's Global Competitiveness Index, the following countries have the world's soundest banking systems:
1. Canada
2. Sweden
3. Luxembourg
4. Australia
The United States ranks 40th, behind Germany and Namibia.
irondave
+0 -0
I guess we need to take that advice to be more European in our approach with some reservations.
I guess we need to take that advice to be more European in our approach with some reservations.
baryonyx
+1 -0
PSSSHHH so they've got banking , big deal, whatev-
Oh.
PSSSHHH so they've got banking , big deal, whatev-
Oh.
pogo
+0 -0
Okay, so 700 or so posts into this weekend, I read the strip again, and remember how puzzled I was by the chamber pot energy system (not pictured). I know what a chamber pot is, having slept in rural Wisconsin abodes without indoor plumbing. Never used one, but am delighted to know it is the origin of the phrase, "They're so poor they don't have a pot to piss in."
Anyway, so Philippe is doing numbers one and two into said pot, the weight of which lifts him (?) into the treehouse? There's a crossover point I don't understand. Also, what energy is derived from otter poop?
Okay, so 700 or so posts into this weekend, I read the strip again, and remember how puzzled I was by the chamber pot energy system (not pictured). I know what a chamber pot is, having slept in rural Wisconsin abodes without indoor plumbing. Never used one, but am delighted to know it is the origin of the phrase, "They're so poor they don't have a pot to piss in."
Anyway, so Philippe is doing numbers one and two into said pot, the weight of which lifts him (?) into the treehouse? There's a crossover point I don't understand. Also, what energy is derived from otter poop?
stereo
+0 -0
Lyle makes use of the chamber pot. Philippe sits on the ground and waits until it is heavy enough to lift him (presumably via some system of pulleys).
When it does, he gets a free elevator ride.
Alternatively, they're using a massive tube as a chamber pot, and Philippe will just float up as the fluid level rises.
Lyle makes use of the chamber pot. Philippe sits on the ground and waits until it is heavy enough to lift him (presumably via some system of pulleys).
When it does, he gets a free elevator ride.
Alternatively, they're using a massive tube as a chamber pot, and Philippe will just float up as the fluid level rises.
tripleg
+0 -0
can you use dried otter feces like buffalo chips?
can you use dried otter feces like buffalo chips?
tekende
+0 -0
WHY FIND OUT
WHY FIND OUT
thegoblins
+0 -0
Poor Saartjie Baartman. She's suffered enough, and now she's a Canadian band.
Poor Saartjie Baartman. She's suffered enough, and now she's a Canadian band.
sje46
+0 -0
Or
?
*googles*
Nevermind.
Or
*googles*
Nevermind.
thegoblins
+0 -0
That ain't the Hottentot Venus. The Hottentot Venus was a slave woman who was put on display at the first world fair because she had elongated labia :(
That ain't the Hottentot Venus. The Hottentot Venus was a slave woman who was put on display at the first world fair because she had elongated labia :(
sje46
+0 -0
I know.
They are all, however, Ba[a]rtmen.
I know.
They are all, however, Ba[a]rtmen.
nerd_specs
+0 -0
nerd_specs
+0 -0
Aw, crap.
Aw, crap.
eatmorekix
+1 -1
let me just say that i think it's total fucking bullshit to make the tour updates part of the premium stuff.
let me just say that i think it's total fucking bullshit to make the tour updates part of the premium stuff.
pogo
+0 -0
Can't we get someone to snitch?
Can't we get someone to snitch?
davey-boy
+0 -0
I'll be your monkey. Give me an e-mail, and we will discuss terms of service.
I'll be your monkey. Give me an e-mail, and we will discuss terms of service.
funcrusherplus
+0 -0
Enough! There's been too much Canada bashing for far too long, I say no more!
Enough! There's been too much Canada bashing for far too long, I say no more!
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Orrrhhh come on. You two countries need to have a chat with New Zealand and Australia. Now there's some country bashing that's done in good fun.
Orrrhhh come on. You two countries need to have a chat with New Zealand and Australia. Now there's some country bashing that's done in good fun.
orvel
+0 -0
Was Friday a "Fuck You [I'm not making a comic] Friday" or am I missing something?
I feel like I am missing something.
Was Friday a "Fuck You [I'm not making a comic] Friday" or am I missing something?
I feel like I am missing something.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Onstad was in Seatle for a book tour.
Onstad was in Seatle for a book tour.
pogo
+0 -0
We've been chewing on this cud since about Thursday, maybe longer.
We've been chewing on this cud since about Thursday, maybe longer.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Mmmm, cud .
Mmmm, cud .
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i thought this was cool.
i thought this was cool.
ctrl_z
+0 -0
I think this strip would've been better if it were just the first 3 panels.
I think this strip would've been better if it were just the first 3 panels.
Oh god Lyle. Just no.
What do you think is going to happen? Some kind of cartoon animal Jonestown? That's a prepost-
Where on earth did ya' dig up this beaute? (I so want to paint this on my kid's room wall. I really do!)
Is this another day on which only cats will talk to me?
How's about a possum?
As long as it's not really some old man but I am just kidding after all
How about multiple possums?
POSSSSUUUUUUUMS!
I met a possum. My blood hurts.
Happy Vamlumtines Day
A wave of babies!
yay someone got the reference!
You're weeping tears of joy.
Moist possums - we love 'em.
LOVE 'EM
Cat yelling at a chicken. Sorry.
It is hard to make fun of Canada, even for Onstad. (He makes fun of the U.K. like no one else though.)
The only people who have ever successfully made fun of Canada are Trey and Matt, and a handful of Canadian-born comedians.
My life is nothing but to kill you
I was about to cite this of proof of the otherwise, but then embarrassingly found out you were right.
Share in my humiliation
How about highly animated inanimate objects?
Mercifully unanimated, at least
A mercifully unamimated highly animated inanimate...
What is this, a Gilbert and Sullivan lyric?
I am the very model of an animated avatar
Sequential gifs are made into a sequence that is seen afar
I might be complicated or I might be just a stick figure
But I will always be an obscure ref'rence - that is de rigeur ...
I AM A BANANA!
I think you meant BANANA!
I know the internet and how to lol a joke real well
I can amuse the assetbar in bb code/HTML
My quality is low and oft my images will pixilate
If Salma Hayek in involved the Audience will masturbate
She made unibrows hot.
Uuuumm... Frieda Kahlo made unibrows hot, if anyone. Salma just adopted it for the movie.
Salma Hayek made nice boobies hot. The unibrow remains a niche perversion.
Nice boobies made Salma Hayek Hot, but that's just me.
I do not think this is a viewpoint which you are alone in holding. Lots of people like boobs... or um, so I've heard.
I hear these men in dark alleyways, speaking in hushed voices. When they see me approach, they turn the conversation to weather, blurting too loudly their love the the summer breeze, but it hangs heavy in the air the truth; these men are breast men .
Once, seeing such a group in the dark corner of a courtyard, I mustered the courage to approach. In a burst of almost untoward humility, I cried "Brothers! You need not hide from me! I too stumble through a world of ass, seeking the bright light of fat titties . Brothers, I say to you THIS IS A HOMEBOY!
Dark and mysterious are our ways, but warm and comforting is the heaving bosom of brotherhood.
Ask a Breast Man today about Joining. We're not a religious organization.
Is it bad if you are neither? Because I am neither.
Let me try this again...
|Meh. I took a risk... and failed miserably. Twice. But you guys know what I'm trying to do here, right? Right?
I .. .I'm not sure.
Sigh. I'm not sure why it got cut off on the left there. The word you cannot see is "TIIIIIIIITS."
THANK you.
I really don't like monkeys. People shouldn't keep monkeys.
LOVE MONKEY BOOBS!
LOVE THEM!
HAIRY!
Oh, Hedo's animated all right. He's just moving so fast you can't tell. Here, let me play it back slow mode for you:
If you can find them, the same artist did an excellent series of paintings in which two rabbits stumble through a hallucinogenic landscape. The kicker is that it's based on two real-life people who were lost in the woods while out of their minds on meth, eventually leading to their death. It was pretty tragic, too, because were in constant contact with a 911 operator; they just couldn't process the world around them in terms that anybody else could understand. (For instance, they thought that a herd of cows milling around and mooing were a bunch of cultists chanting.)
Potent stuff.
[urlhttps://www.howdypardner.com/slideshow/slideshow.html[/url]
https://www.howdypardner.com/slideshow/slideshow.html
Thank you, sje46. This guy's stuff is dark . Creepy, wonderful dark. If your daddy ain't proud, I am.
I now realize how sorry I am about all the meth I turned down back when I lived in sticks. It sounds fantastic. I always heard that it just made you clean your kitchen twice an hour and then lose your teeth. Actually, I've observed this drug fairly closely and I know for sure that this is exactly what happens. These rabbit men must have mixed a little something in.
I would tell you that my state is the meth capital of the country, but every state tries to boast that now. It's lost it's novelty.
New England is probably the last place in the country where it's not a huge pandemic, even though it is getting more popular.
What state are you?
The country I come from is called the Midwest.
guessing time! I choose... Pennsylvania!
No, but thank you for playing.
Indiana.
The trick is to pick a state that is actually in the Midwest.
Unless you did that on purpose.
OK, I live in Missouri, The Meth Capital of the U.S.
close enough for comfort... at least for a country in which I never plan to live. We burned down your White House, fuckers! Deal with it!
Truuuue.... But we are still using the same weapons as we did back then.
Quote:
Cool old Dylan reference. "With God on Our Side," I believe.
A comment left by pogo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by falseprophet, cuddlefish, Cracklewater, gardenhead_)
Baby brother recovered from crack, and maintains a rather hopeful disposition about the world at large. He has nothing to say to meth addicts. I think you have the right idea.
Pogo, are you by chance the CIA?
There are probably plenty aspects of your personality that I would wish to kill you if I was so inclined, but I like to think that every human life has some value and that eugenics is not a great idea.
Yes, every life is sacred, and I can hold that concept in my mind alongside the "let the evil ones die" concept. Strange thing, the human mind.
I dislike this apparent interchangeability of "evil" and "stupid".
What, you don't think poor people are lazy?
Everybody is both STUPID AND EVIL for ignoring the 4 days. Cube Divinity transcends all knowledge, Humans can't escape 4 corner Cubic Life. The eyes of the flounder fish were relocated, why were yours relocated? Your opposite eyes were moved to 1 corner to overlay for single perspective, but that corrupts your Opposite Brain.
Holy Shitballs.
Very impressive tinfoil-hat ranting! Example: Bible fraud will destroy fools, and they will eat one another.
Chubby for getting in the mindset of that Time Cube guy.
That guy is craaaaa-zy.
Why can't people just accept that the Earth was made in seventh days, and God sent himself to be tortured and to die and we commemorate this by wearing the device used to kill him around our necks?
Are you saying that Christians are crazy than that guy?
My wife spent a long while prosecuting meth people for our state (the meth capitol of the world). I can say, with absolute certainty, that meth is primarily a sex drug. Seems it makes you aroused like you wouldn't believe, and enjoy the act in new and nauseating ways. People do meth and boink for hours. Then after a year or so, you can no longer maintain an erection, or whatever it is women do. You can no longer bang, but you must still take meth or you freak out. It is not an awesome drug.
But in the meantime, you get to fuck like you were George Zimmer. I guarantee it.
OK, I've been lurking around for ages, but I finally had to create an account in order to comment on this topic. I just wanted to CLARIFY that meth does not make you want to boink for hours; it's not some type of low-class Viagra. It makes you NOT COME for hours, and while a Normal Person would, you know, give it up for a lost cause, the Tweaker will just keep on goin' at it, for hours and hours. I'm sure it's very frustrating. That alone should be enough to make you wanna stay away from the stuff. I just wanted to make sure you all understand the effects, and not get any weird ideas about taking meth in order to boink for hours. It... really is not a sex drug at all. I know these things.
Nerd_specs is right. Everyone knows it's POT that makes you boink for hours.
Unless, you know, you get distracted by a bag of Doritos and an episode of "Cheaters" and never finish getting your pants off.
Addendum: I know these things.
Just an addition to nerd_specs: In Australia ER doctors are mainly annoyed because Heroin addicts just came in half-conscious, fortunately our good police people got Heroin off the streets. Now we have Meth addicts! They come in to an ER wanting to tear Nurses and Doctors inside out with their minds/hands. One Doctor told the story of a man in an observation holding room (locked room made mainly of glass) who was masturbating for 14 hours straight.
14 hours? Did anyone even try to stop him from rubbing his dick out of existence?
Think of the swelling, the bruising and pain.
They had him in a locked glass box because he was too dangerous to approach.
Could have exploded at any second.
I'm feeling a similar condition due to your avatar
Whoa, did NOT know the boinking-not-coming thing. Makes sense that there would be some sort of thrill to the otherwise frantic-seeming high. But only a hillbilly would think that endless humping is a good thing. I repeat, let 'em die.
Apparently, it was the advent of viagra that caused meth to really take off in some sections of the gay community.
Meth's been around for over half a century and has, most of the time, been considered the lowest form of recreational drug (or a tool for increasing productivity in factory workers, if you look at the post-war transformation of countries like Japan and Thailand).
It was never that popular with people who like party drugs or fucking, due to it causing:
a) antisocial behaviour
b) 'speed-cock'
Viagra reduced the incidence of problem b, though I have no data on whether a meth/viagra cocktail helps the tumescent user to 'max.
Only one way to find out really. I'll get the chemicals, you meet me at Denny's. Wear something slutty.
Alcoholic tiger dander can cause spontaneous cat allergies fearsome enough to cripple the kind of people who set LOLcats as their homepage.