centipede_damascus
+0 -0
I have been meaning to get the cookbook for a while.
Or maybe I will just save it for my birthday that is not to far away HINT HINT.
I have been meaning to get the cookbook for a while.
Or maybe I will just save it for my birthday that is not to far away HINT HINT.
zem
+15 -0
the cookbook is worth it just for the writing. "We have a thing we do where we throw them away."
the cookbook is worth it just for the writing. "We have a thing we do where we throw them away."
tragicone
+0 -0
Truly a classic remark
Truly a classic remark
everything_is_a_hat
+1 -0
I brought my cook book and it arrived right on the day my friend was having a post thanksgiving pot luck party! so naturally I made stuff from it. damn good cook book.
I brought my cook book and it arrived right on the day my friend was having a post thanksgiving pot luck party! so naturally I made stuff from it. damn good cook book.
connellingus
+52 -0
I loved the drawing Onstad did for my personalized cookbook. It's Roast Beef in a chef's outfit saying, "This cookbook is for a dude who is basically alone in his life." I think Onstad is making fun of me for ordering a cookbook personalized to myself.
I loved the drawing Onstad did for my personalized cookbook. It's Roast Beef in a chef's outfit saying, "This cookbook is for a dude who is basically alone in his life." I think Onstad is making fun of me for ordering a cookbook personalized to myself.
vucubcaquix
+0 -0
Yikes, dude!
Yikes, dude!
riazm
+0 -0
Mine is a similar outfit but he's saying "You ain't got to cook none of these they are beneath you."
TAKE THAT CONNELINGUS.
Also Onstad's signature is spazzy as hell.
Mine is a similar outfit but he's saying "You ain't got to cook none of these they are beneath you."
TAKE THAT CONNELINGUS.
Also Onstad's signature is spazzy as hell.
owen
+1 -0
mine is also a drawing of beef in a chef's outfit, but he is saying "Dogg sorry my recipies are crass as the dickens and just nasty as HELL"
i'm glad i bought the cook kit - totally worth every penny. Ray's 'Rad Chilies' hot sauce is f'ing delicious.
mine is also a drawing of beef in a chef's outfit, but he is saying "Dogg sorry my recipies are crass as the dickens and just nasty as HELL"
i'm glad i bought the cook kit - totally worth every penny. Ray's 'Rad Chilies' hot sauce is f'ing delicious.
zefiel
+2 -1
is Connelingus the act of licking Cornelius Bear's most gentlemanly parts
is Connelingus the act of licking Cornelius Bear's most gentlemanly parts
hellofditties
+1 -0
He is a stuffed animal.
He is a stuffed animal.
st-elmos_fire
+1 -0
It has been shown that they aaaalll have gentletalia
It has been shown that they aaaalll have gentletalia
riazm
+0 -0
ain't NOTHING gentle 'bout my tenderness.
ain't NOTHING gentle 'bout my tenderness.
whuppins
+34 -0
My wife bought me the cookbook for my birthday. Two days later I'm buying a 15 dollar pastry brush.
What the fuck
My wife bought me the cookbook for my birthday. Two days later I'm buying a 15 dollar pastry brush.
What the fuck
mashuren
+31 -1
Oh man you're in it for the long haul now
It starts with a cookbook, then a pastry brush... before you know it, you're selling your body in the street and dealing powdered sugar just to try to get enough to get one more saucepan...
It's a hard damn life.
Oh man you're in it for the long haul now
It starts with a cookbook, then a pastry brush... before you know it, you're selling your body in the street and dealing powdered sugar just to try to get enough to get one more saucepan...
It's a hard damn life.
catachresis
+3 -0
THE COOKBOOK ARRIVED
OVEN FRIES TOMORROW
THE COOKBOOK ARRIVED
OVEN FRIES TOMORROW
tellumo
+0 -0
Make T�odor's Flavor Burgers too! Those and some oven fries would punish about now . . .
Make T�odor's Flavor Burgers too! Those and some oven fries would punish about now . . .
riazm
+0 -0
Has anyone made a bloody mary using the hot sauce?
Has anyone made a bloody mary using the hot sauce?
riazm
+2 -0
I have now made a bloody mary using the hot sauce.
I have now made a bloody mary using the hot sauce.
tekende
+0 -0
How was it?
How was it?
riazm
+0 -0
Noticeably altered, I don't always use it now, but its a nice little punch ever so often.
Noticeably altered, I don't always use it now, but its a nice little punch ever so often.
junko
+0 -0
A comment left by junko was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, HonestTom, MinorTough, Connellingus)
A comment left by junko was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, HonestTom, MinorTough, Connellingus)
riazm
+0 -0
I also have the cookbook, and the hot sauce. And the apron.
The hot sauce is everything hot sauce could be.
I also have the cookbook, and the hot sauce. And the apron.
The hot sauce is everything hot sauce could be.
slanger
+0 -0
The oven fries are a staple in my home. This is a very very good cookbook.
The oven fries are a staple in my home. This is a very very good cookbook.
tragicone
+0 -0
Anyone feel like giving me the money to buy this?
Anyone feel like giving me the money to buy this?
quantumcasaba
+2 -0
I am a consumer whore.
And how!
..just ordered the cookbook and a 'Dude' hoodie. Happy autumn to me .
Now is the fun part! Anticipation of mail that is a present and not such as a reminder that my money is not really my own.
I am a consumer whore.
And how!
..just ordered the cookbook and a 'Dude' hoodie. Happy autumn to me .
Now is the fun part! Anticipation of mail that is a present and not such as a reminder that my money is not really my own.
jips
+24 -0
Here's what you can expect your fries to turn out. They are, in fact crispy on the outside, fluffy on the inside and delicious all over. And I prolly took em out a little quickly.
Here's what you can expect your fries to turn out. They are, in fact crispy on the outside, fluffy on the inside and delicious all over. And I prolly took em out a little quickly.
meganasty
+9 -0
Man those look all hot and crispy as the dickens
Man those look all hot and crispy as the dickens
laserblade
+9 -0
All melting in your mouth. All affirming your existence.
All melting in your mouth. All affirming your existence.
snowman
+11 -1
When I was about 11 years old I made up my own superhero and named him Lazerblade. He was awesome*. He was almost an exact cross between Cyclops from X-Men, and Snake Eyes from G.I. Joe.
*He was not awesome.
When I was about 11 years old I made up my own superhero and named him Lazerblade. He was awesome*. He was almost an exact cross between Cyclops from X-Men, and Snake Eyes from G.I. Joe.
*He was not awesome.
tekende
+0 -2
What the hell? What the hell does this have to do with anything?
What the hell? What the hell does this have to do with anything?
snowman
+0 -0
The guy I was talking to has the screen name "laserblade."
Also: Jesus, man.
The guy I was talking to has the screen name "laserblade."
Also: Jesus, man.
tekende
+1 -2
Oh.
Oh.
laserblade
+0 -0
Yeah...
Yeah...
maximus
+0 -0
Hey Kool-Aid!............
Hey Kool-Aid!............
gournal
+1 -0
Oh man, I am laughing way too hard about this exchange. Thank you for attacking someone with completely undeserved rage- you have made my day.
Oh man, I am laughing way too hard about this exchange. Thank you for attacking someone with completely undeserved rage- you have made my day.
tellumo
+0 -0
That's the stuff! I like mine with mustard, or this garlic-mustard aioli I found at Trader Joe's. The friends I have dinner with every so often are crazy for these things.
That's the stuff! I like mine with mustard, or this garlic-mustard aioli I found at Trader Joe's. The friends I have dinner with every so often are crazy for these things.
deusoma
+2 -0
Those look so damn good it's taking a concentrated effort not to eat my monitor.
Those look so damn good it's taking a concentrated effort not to eat my monitor.
mattylite
+0 -0
I don't recommend the Mojave cookbook, though. Here's how you can expect your slim jim to turn out:
(what you can't see is that it is hot now)
I don't recommend the Mojave cookbook, though. Here's how you can expect your slim jim to turn out:
(what you can't see is that it is hot now)
mattylite
+0 -0
[there used to be a picture of a slim jim there in that comment. You know what a slim jim looks like, right?]
[there used to be a picture of a slim jim there in that comment. You know what a slim jim looks like, right?]
soticoto
+0 -0
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, tekende, theplaidknight, usversusthem, pquinn87)
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, tekende, theplaidknight, usversusthem, pquinn87)
epicurus
+9 -0
I am going to leave the room and come back in. And when I do, you need to be someone different.
I am going to leave the room and come back in. And when I do, you need to be someone different.
soticoto
+0 -0
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, tekende, Deusoma, relaxing, theplaidknight, Wulvaine, miaou)
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, tekende, Deusoma, relaxing, theplaidknight, Wulvaine, miaou)
semiquaver
+1 -0
If you've had crispy fries that stick in your teeth, then you've had bad crispy fries.
If you've had good crispy fries and you still prefer those little fatty potato sticks from Mickey D's...then you are sick.
If you've had crispy fries that stick in your teeth, then you've had bad crispy fries.
If you've had good crispy fries and you still prefer those little fatty potato sticks from Mickey D's...then you are sick.
soticoto
+0 -0
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, orvel, relaxing, Troy_Convers, usversusthem, pquinn87)
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, orvel, relaxing, Troy_Convers, usversusthem, pquinn87)
semiquaver
+0 -0
You've never had crispy fries, then, just crispy chips, which are admittedly distasteful. Crispy fries are basically potato bacon. So tasty.
The only way to get fries called chips here is to order fish and chips. I order a lot of fish and chips ;-; We have a semi-major fast-food chain in the Pacific Northwest that actually does a fantastic fish and chips, if I can't move ass to go to a restaurant. And then there are *street vendors* for fish and chips at the Portland Saturday Market.
Basically what I am telling you is please do not be too ashamed of us yanks. At least we can put whitefish in batter and slather it with vinegar.
You've never had crispy fries, then, just crispy chips, which are admittedly distasteful. Crispy fries are basically potato bacon. So tasty.
The only way to get fries called chips here is to order fish and chips. I order a lot of fish and chips ;-; We have a semi-major fast-food chain in the Pacific Northwest that actually does a fantastic fish and chips, if I can't move ass to go to a restaurant. And then there are *street vendors* for fish and chips at the Portland Saturday Market.
Basically what I am telling you is please do not be too ashamed of us yanks. At least we can put whitefish in batter and slather it with vinegar.
soticoto
+0 -0
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, snowman, mashisoyo, relaxing, quaga, IggyMoonbeam, proof_man, nutmeg, Wulvaine, bixschmix, usversusthem, miaou, pquinn87, tellumo)
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, snowman, mashisoyo, relaxing, quaga, IggyMoonbeam, proof_man, nutmeg, Wulvaine, bixschmix, usversusthem, miaou, pquinn87, tellumo)
semiquaver
+8 -0
It seems like you asserted your national identity after I tried to indicate that fries is just a regional name for what can be a different foodstuff to chips. I don't believe being sarcastic/demeaning towards me in your earlier post and being nationalistic in this one is justified. I was trying to be polite and even sweet about Anglo/American food culture, but being rude and generalizing us ignores the fact that there are some very nice Americans posting here who don't necessarily enjoy being insulted. Just in case you were wondering about getting lamed and all.
As for the differences between our countries, it's pretty rich criticizing our influence when a quarter of the world's population used to be a part of the British Empire. We're only two hundred years old. Let us enjoy our adolescence. Don't worry, I promise we'll flame out and become a rotting, polluted husk within the next century. Friends?
It seems like you asserted your national identity after I tried to indicate that fries is just a regional name for what can be a different foodstuff to chips. I don't believe being sarcastic/demeaning towards me in your earlier post and being nationalistic in this one is justified. I was trying to be polite and even sweet about Anglo/American food culture, but being rude and generalizing us ignores the fact that there are some very nice Americans posting here who don't necessarily enjoy being insulted. Just in case you were wondering about getting lamed and all.
As for the differences between our countries, it's pretty rich criticizing our influence when a quarter of the world's population used to be a part of the British Empire. We're only two hundred years old. Let us enjoy our adolescence. Don't worry, I promise we'll flame out and become a rotting, polluted husk within the next century. Friends?
soticoto
+0 -0
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, mashisoyo, quaga, nutmeg, cailetshadow, pquinn87, tellumo)
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, mashisoyo, quaga, nutmeg, cailetshadow, pquinn87, tellumo)
semiquaver
+0 -0
Apathy rendered.
Apathy rendered.
deusoma
+6 -0
Let's hear it for Canada! Nobody hates us!
(specifically, anyway)
Let's hear it for Canada! Nobody hates us!
(specifically, anyway)
semiquaver
+2 -0
Even the most hardcore of douchebags down here can't muster the inventiveness necessary to criticize a damn thing about Canada. A lot of people aren't crazy about your perverse social freedoms, weird socialized health care, disgustingly cheap prescription drugs, revoltingly picturesque scenery, and so on. But bitching about Canada is more or less seen as small, anywhere in the country.
Even the most hardcore of douchebags down here can't muster the inventiveness necessary to criticize a damn thing about Canada. A lot of people aren't crazy about your perverse social freedoms, weird socialized health care, disgustingly cheap prescription drugs, revoltingly picturesque scenery, and so on. But bitching about Canada is more or less seen as small, anywhere in the country.
soticoto
+0 -0
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, fakead, quaga, Semiquaver, cailetshadow, usversusthem, pquinn87, tellumo)
A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, fakead, quaga, Semiquaver, cailetshadow, usversusthem, pquinn87, tellumo)
mattylite
+0 -2
Wait, I thought Canada was the 49th state. They made it a country now?!
Wait, I thought Canada was the 49th state. They made it a country now?!
semiquaver
+0 -0
Yep. And just wait until you hear about Alaska.
Yep. And just wait until you hear about Alaska.
leftsaidtim
+1 -0
If Canada is America-Lite then Mexico is pure uncut Grade A columbian America on a 5 day bender. You can't get that shit in the states.
If Canada is America-Lite then Mexico is pure uncut Grade A columbian America on a 5 day bender. You can't get that shit in the states.
troy_convers
+2 -1
"Canada. The apartment above a really good party."
- BILL HICKS
"Canada. The apartment above a really good party."
- BILL HICKS
heccibiggs
+10 -0
Duuuuude... stop making us Brits out as diiicks...
(Imagine I said this in a sort of quiet, out-one-side-of-my-mouth kind of way, while looking in another direction and feigning not paying attention.)
Duuuuude... stop making us Brits out as diiicks...
(Imagine I said this in a sort of quiet, out-one-side-of-my-mouth kind of way, while looking in another direction and feigning not paying attention.)
semiquaver
+0 -0
The sad thing is that I love Brits. I grew up in England. I have infinitely fond memories of a childhood of romantic rain, languid summers, trees climbed, conkers conked, fences scaled, rhodedendron bushes hidden behind. Soticoto is just That Guy.
The sad thing is that I love Brits. I grew up in England. I have infinitely fond memories of a childhood of romantic rain, languid summers, trees climbed, conkers conked, fences scaled, rhodedendron bushes hidden behind. Soticoto is just That Guy.
soticoto
+0 -1
I own the rhodedendron bushes.
They are all mine to hide in.
Like they were made for me.
Damnit.
Why can't they come with me to Highgate?
I own the rhodedendron bushes.
They are all mine to hide in.
Like they were made for me.
Damnit.
Why can't they come with me to Highgate?
bjorntd
+1 -0
I secretly wish I was English. It is my private shame.
I secretly wish I was English. It is my private shame.
snowman
+0 -0
Ha ha, you're awesome. I totally get the voice thing. I do. I get it. Here, enjoy a chubby.
Ha ha, you're awesome. I totally get the voice thing. I do. I get it. Here, enjoy a chubby.
snowman
+8 -0
Thank you! Just as people in Mexico don't speak Spanish, they speak "Mexican!" You're absolutely right, it's ridiculous that we Americans would refer to the "language" we speak as "English." You know, the language we are all using to communicate back and forth right now? Without anyone having to translate? In fact, I can barely understand your "English," as I have never bothered to learn a foreign language. (Something I lament almost daily, especially when I have to decipher the strange "English" words you use, like "ashamed" and "business" and "continue." Ha ha, I guess it's all "Greek" to me!
By the way, how many senses of the word "wrong" are there?
Thank you! Just as people in Mexico don't speak Spanish, they speak "Mexican!" You're absolutely right, it's ridiculous that we Americans would refer to the "language" we speak as "English." You know, the language we are all using to communicate back and forth right now? Without anyone having to translate? In fact, I can barely understand your "English," as I have never bothered to learn a foreign language. (Something I lament almost daily, especially when I have to decipher the strange "English" words you use, like "ashamed" and "business" and "continue." Ha ha, I guess it's all "Greek" to me!
By the way, how many senses of the word "wrong" are there?
troy_convers
+0 -2
Center instead of Centre.
Alumium instead of aluminium.
The date the wrong way round.
Apartment instead of flat.
Theater instead of cinema.
Elevator instead of lift.
Car fender instead of car wing.
Tires instead of Tyres.
Color instead of Colour (that one always cracks me up).
Carburetor instead of carburettor.
Gas instead of petrol.
Semi pronounced 'sem-EYE' instead of 'sem-EEE'.
Soccer instead of football.
You're right. You Yanks don't speak English.
Center instead of Centre.
Alumium instead of aluminium.
The date the wrong way round.
Apartment instead of flat.
Theater instead of cinema.
Elevator instead of lift.
Car fender instead of car wing.
Tires instead of Tyres.
Color instead of Colour (that one always cracks me up).
Carburetor instead of carburettor.
Gas instead of petrol.
Semi pronounced 'sem-EYE' instead of 'sem-EEE'.
Soccer instead of football.
You're right. You Yanks don't speak English.
korukyu
+2 -0
"We have a thing we do where we throw them away." PURE GOLD. straight witty goodness.
"We have a thing we do where we throw them away." PURE GOLD. straight witty goodness.
mattylite
+0 -0
Do you think it is on accident that Ray is standing there asmirk occluding the word "more" with that very altitude of his body to which his machismo-enhanced imaginary boner might reach? Or do you agree that it is on purpose?
Do you think it is on accident that Ray is standing there asmirk occluding the word "more" with that very altitude of his body to which his machismo-enhanced imaginary boner might reach? Or do you agree that it is on purpose?
videocrime
+0 -0
where can i read the rest? help!
where can i read the rest? help!
zadig
+0 -0
In the cookbook. It will cost you money, but it is worth it.
In the cookbook. It will cost you money, but it is worth it.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i would so kill for the free ending of this recipe.
but i will pay money for the cookbook when i go to school so Achewood can be my breakfast.
also spaghetti phillipo!
i would so kill for the free ending of this recipe.
but i will pay money for the cookbook when i go to school so Achewood can be my breakfast.
also spaghetti phillipo!
robotrodeo
+0 -0
this is so great
this is so great
fuzzyshoo
+2 -0
This is probably my 15th or 20th time through the archives and every time I get to this strip I sit here and debate on buying the cookbook.
Today is the day I ordered the cookbook. I am sick of feeling like Mrs. John Lithgow whenever my friends make me oven fries.
This is probably my 15th or 20th time through the archives and every time I get to this strip I sit here and debate on buying the cookbook.
Today is the day I ordered the cookbook. I am sick of feeling like Mrs. John Lithgow whenever my friends make me oven fries.
fuzzyshoo
+0 -0
Update: These are completely delicious in every way. I recommended serving them with a seasoned tomato puree.
Update: These are completely delicious in every way. I recommended serving them with a seasoned tomato puree.
modality
+0 -0
thank you onstad for passing on a definitive compendium of how to get basic things right in the kitchen--knowledge that a generation of latch key children and divorce survivors would have never been able to piece together on our own
thank you onstad for passing on a definitive compendium of how to get basic things right in the kitchen--knowledge that a generation of latch key children and divorce survivors would have never been able to piece together on our own
ravindra108
+0 -0
I love that throwing Pat's fries away has become a thing that they do... They probably don't even have to say anything anymore... Pat just shows up with his prize slug fries, and they all glance at each other, silently saying "Oh it's on... We are doing that thing that we do! "
I love that throwing Pat's fries away has become a thing that they do... They probably don't even have to say anything anymore... Pat just shows up with his prize slug fries, and they all glance at each other, silently saying "Oh it's on... We are doing that thing that we do! "
masterofmetroid
+0 -0
Hey, not all oven fries are bad. Used to get these fantastic ones from Trader Joe's that are covered in garlicy deliciousness.
Hey, not all oven fries are bad. Used to get these fantastic ones from Trader Joe's that are covered in garlicy deliciousness.
A comment left by asherdan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by plummet, GeyserShitdick, retinarow, littlefatdog, dropkickpikachu)
You know what? I did. I just fucking did buy the cookbook.
I feel awesome.
A comment left by zefiel was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Adventive, RBisme, yaegmenthor)
Been meaning to do that for... wait, let me check the date on the strip.
Yeah, I've been meaning to do that for maybe three years. Three years. It consistently terrifies me that it's been this long.
Your life is about to change... for the AWESOME.
A comment left by asherdan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zefiel, GeyserShitdick, Moraiat, luckypyjamas, bixschmix, usversusthem, benfromtenn)
Heh, well, he's suddenly got a few salesmen here and there, hm?
How about now? (One year later)
Well, another cookbook is coming out.
I guess everyone wins on that deal.
Congratulations. I bought me that cookbook, apron and hot sauce. Never have I experienced so much WIN.
Amazing. You actually have more chubbies than lames.