deimosrising
+0 -0
A comment left by deimosrising was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by SSDDR, Connellingus, Firehawk, Darthemed)
A comment left by deimosrising was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by SSDDR, Connellingus, Firehawk, Darthemed)
wehavemagnums
+3 -0
Heehee
Heehee
onepapertiger
+0 -0
why does this have so many chubbies?
why does this have so many chubbies?
laserblade
+9 -1
MMM WHATCHA SAY
MMM THAT IT'S ALL FOR THE BEST
OF COURSE IT IS
MMM WHATCHA SAY
MMM THAT IT'S ALL FOR THE BEST
OF COURSE IT IS
onepapertiger
+0 -0
WHY IS IT SUCH A HARD QUESTION!! JEEEEZ!!!
WHY IS IT SUCH A HARD QUESTION!! JEEEEZ!!!
soticoto
+0 -0
BECAUSE YOU TOUCH YOURSELF AT NIGHT!! JEEEZ!!!
BECAUSE YOU TOUCH YOURSELF AT NIGHT!! JEEEZ!!!
sp1derbaby
+0 -0
It has a Precedent. And the avatar helps.
It has a Precedent. And the avatar helps.
fallow_fields
+1 -0
google 'SNL dear sister' and your questions will be answered
google 'SNL dear sister' and your questions will be answered
farqussus
+1 -0
This was a meme that passed me by entirely and I feel neither disappointment nor remorse.
This was a meme that passed me by entirely and I feel neither disappointment nor remorse.
thegoblins
+0 -0
That "Dear Sister" skit was actually meant to be a parody of some sort of teenage drama in which someone gets shot. I forget what the name of the show was, but I know all the children in my school used to watch it except for me.
That "Dear Sister" skit was actually meant to be a parody of some sort of teenage drama in which someone gets shot. I forget what the name of the show was, but I know all the children in my school used to watch it except for me.
heccibiggs
+3 -0
THE OC
THAT SHIT FULLY SUCKS
Not as much as One Tree Hill, though. And Gossip Girl is like the poorest thing ever. And now there's a new series of Beverly Hills 90210 that's just called 90210? WHY
Give me some Buffy any day.
THE OC
THAT SHIT FULLY SUCKS
Not as much as One Tree Hill, though. And Gossip Girl is like the poorest thing ever. And now there's a new series of Beverly Hills 90210 that's just called 90210? WHY
Give me some Buffy any day.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Oh yes, the OC. That was it.
I guess there's some other show about girls that many people watch called the Hills, and it seems to be about young people who actually can't think of things to say to each other. It's very sad and painful to watch.
Oh yes, the OC. That was it.
I guess there's some other show about girls that many people watch called the Hills, and it seems to be about young people who actually can't think of things to say to each other. It's very sad and painful to watch.
onepapertiger
+0 -0
Like a party in
RL?
Like a party in
RL?
thegoblins
+0 -0
well, no, you see, in a party people are all loaded up with alcohol so they won't shut up.
well, no, you see, in a party people are all loaded up with alcohol so they won't shut up.
brokeaccount
+0 -1
I want my three minutes back.
I want my three minutes back.
suprememongoose
+1 -0
Seeing the word "postprandial" makes me inordinately happy.
Seeing the word "postprandial" makes me inordinately happy.
chaesar
+1 -1
Cornelius' poly-syllabic words give me a half-chubb too.
Y'all read the wikipedia description of grappa, it sounds pretty raw to drink.
Cornelius' poly-syllabic words give me a half-chubb too.
Y'all read the wikipedia description of grappa, it sounds pretty raw to drink.
twotonturkey
+4 -0
It sounds pretty raw to drink because it is pretty raw to drink. My friend's dad is from Italy and made us try a batch of his homemade grappa once. It's a good thing there weren't any guns around.
It sounds pretty raw to drink because it is pretty raw to drink. My friend's dad is from Italy and made us try a batch of his homemade grappa once. It's a good thing there weren't any guns around.
notgodot
+8 -0
Grappa definitely makes one afraid of the police.
Grappa definitely makes one afraid of the police.
bigtom
+13 -0
i had Grappa once, i no longer believe in god
i had Grappa once, i no longer believe in god
soticoto
+0 -0
Believing in Bowie is a definite improvement, so it was for the best.
Believing in Bowie is a definite improvement, so it was for the best.
le_chien_manquee
+1 -0
i was on the grappa last night and i wasn't afraid of the fucking police. it's a fine libation, let me tell you.
i was on the grappa last night and i wasn't afraid of the fucking police. it's a fine libation, let me tell you.
straw
+2 -0
Seriously, what is the deal with people badmouthing some fine grappa? I'm sorry, would you prefer a fucking white wine spritzer? Virgin Shirly Temple? If you can't handle the heat, don't waste good booze by not knowing what it is.
Seriously, what is the deal with people badmouthing some fine grappa? I'm sorry, would you prefer a fucking white wine spritzer? Virgin Shirly Temple? If you can't handle the heat, don't waste good booze by not knowing what it is.
saru
+8 -0
I only buy virgin Shirley Temples with money I get from an ATM machine.
I only buy virgin Shirley Temples with money I get from an ATM machine.
atticusonline
+12 -1
don't say ATM machine, it is silly to say machine twice!
don't say ATM machine, it is silly to say machine twice!
sp1derbaby
+0 -1
Gah, no chubbies left. Please accept an IOU.
Gah, no chubbies left. Please accept an IOU.
atticusonline
+4 -0
huugggggggsss
huugggggggsss
shutup_shutup
+10 -0
At the ATM machine you have to enter your PIN number.
At the ATM machine you have to enter your PIN number.
atticusonline
+0 -1
"Reissue June, 2008"
don't say ATM machine, it is silly to say machine twice!
[/reissue]
"Reissue June, 2008"
don't say ATM machine, it is silly to say machine twice!
[/reissue]
dickie_roxx
+0 -0
As of 7 months ago, atticusonline still didn't get the joke about the Shirley Temple. He also didn't get the joke about the Personal Idenification Number.
As of 7 months ago, atticusonline still didn't get the joke about the Shirley Temple. He also didn't get the joke about the Personal Idenification Number.
atticusonline
+0 -1
Not commenting about oxymorons does not mean i don't get them! Wheeeeeee!
Not commenting about oxymorons does not mean i don't get them! Wheeeeeee!
dickie_roxx
+0 -0
In that case, I am confused as to why "ATM machine" draws your ire, twice, while the other tautologies are left alone.
In that case, I am confused as to why "ATM machine" draws your ire, twice, while the other tautologies are left alone.
atticusonline
+1 -1
You hear ATM Machine more often plus people usually do it on accident whereas he was stating those for the purpose of humor :-D
You hear ATM Machine more often plus people usually do it on accident whereas he was stating those for the purpose of humor :-D
gitarooman
+0 -1
Because you insist on acting like such a pedant, I have lamed all of your comments. They are just terrible and I do not understand why the first one got so many chubbies. I would say no hard feelings but I actually have hard feelings for pedantic assholes.
Because you insist on acting like such a pedant, I have lamed all of your comments. They are just terrible and I do not understand why the first one got so many chubbies. I would say no hard feelings but I actually have hard feelings for pedantic assholes.
scifigrl47
+2 -0
Someone's been in the grappa.
Someone's been in the grappa.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
The sour grappa...
The sour grappa...
ceres
+2 -0
Like knowing it's made of all that's left over from wine production?
Admittedly it's an interesting drink, and some are pretty decent, but bad grappa is like licking Satan's asshole.
Like knowing it's made of all that's left over from wine production?
Admittedly it's an interesting drink, and some are pretty decent, but bad grappa is like licking Satan's asshole.
tonyhighwind
+0 -0
Grappa is known as "Italian Rocket Fuel" in the household I grew up in. The day you drink a glass of grappa is the day you become a Man.
Grappa is known as "Italian Rocket Fuel" in the household I grew up in. The day you drink a glass of grappa is the day you become a Man.
gitarooman
+0 -2
That line is actually my least favorite line from Cornelius, and perhaps in Achewood in general. Not only is postprandial an extremely pretentious word to use, even for Connie, but what is worse is the use of the term HAND-ROLLED. Nobody fucking calls rolled cigarettes "hand-rolled", ESPECIALLY not people who smoke them exclusively. People that roll their own cigarettes do not ever call them that, they just call them cigarettes. Filtered cigarettes are a pretty recent invention, and I've always assumed that his character pre-dates their wide-spread popularity. The fact that Cornelius actually says the word "hand-rolled" is one of the most annoying things in Achewood, and it just absolutely destroys my suspension of disbelief. Now go ahead and lame this comment into oblivion because it expresses an opinion other than admiration and... well I checked my thesaurus for a synonym for dick-sucking, but you know what I mean.
That line is actually my least favorite line from Cornelius, and perhaps in Achewood in general. Not only is postprandial an extremely pretentious word to use, even for Connie, but what is worse is the use of the term HAND-ROLLED. Nobody fucking calls rolled cigarettes "hand-rolled", ESPECIALLY not people who smoke them exclusively. People that roll their own cigarettes do not ever call them that, they just call them cigarettes. Filtered cigarettes are a pretty recent invention, and I've always assumed that his character pre-dates their wide-spread popularity. The fact that Cornelius actually says the word "hand-rolled" is one of the most annoying things in Achewood, and it just absolutely destroys my suspension of disbelief. Now go ahead and lame this comment into oblivion because it expresses an opinion other than admiration and... well I checked my thesaurus for a synonym for dick-sucking, but you know what I mean.
suprememongoose
+0 -0
A comment left by suprememongoose was marked as spam and excluded. suprememongoose: What a douche. (reported by SSDDR, mortshire, heatbag)
A comment left by suprememongoose was marked as spam and excluded. suprememongoose: What a douche. (reported by SSDDR, mortshire, heatbag)
suprememongoose
+6 -0
Odd - my browser spazzed and went blank after I posted my initial comment, and when I returned, there was a blank comment. I wondered what made those show up. Apologies all.
Odd - my browser spazzed and went blank after I posted my initial comment, and when I returned, there was a blank comment. I wondered what made those show up. Apologies all.
wehavemagnums
+12 -0
Pat's such a dick
Pat's such a dick
untilyouaresonude
+2 -1
Mr. Bear is really okay with how this all went down when he recovers. That's a standup guy, that is.
Mr. Bear is really okay with how this all went down when he recovers. That's a standup guy, that is.
hollis
+0 -0
Why does Pat wear shoes? I don't think anybody else does on a regular basis.
Why does Pat wear shoes? I don't think anybody else does on a regular basis.
talix18
+1 -0
Besides Philippe?
Besides Philippe?
ortsac
+0 -0
Lyle also wears shoes as part of his basic wardrobe.
Lyle also wears shoes as part of his basic wardrobe.
sp1derbaby
+0 -0
Cornelius wears slippers quite a bit (and in this strip).
Cornelius wears slippers quite a bit (and in this strip).
leon_sumbitches
+2 -0
all I could say just now when I saw this strip is HOLY FUCK! HE JUST BLEW AWAY AN OLD MAN!!
But at least he didn't do it on purpose this time. Although if he hadn't shot Cornelius then he would of shot beef. on purpose!
all I could say just now when I saw this strip is HOLY FUCK! HE JUST BLEW AWAY AN OLD MAN!!
But at least he didn't do it on purpose this time. Although if he hadn't shot Cornelius then he would of shot beef. on purpose!
zefiel
+0 -0
A comment left by zefiel was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ezcmac, thunderbat, le_chien_manquee)
A comment left by zefiel was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ezcmac, thunderbat, le_chien_manquee)
vorrishnikov
+3 -0
This is my favorite strip. It also has the best alt text ever. What scares me is that Onstad must have taken a large gulp of grappa and suddenly thought about what would happen if he was holding a gun at that moment.
This is my favorite strip. It also has the best alt text ever. What scares me is that Onstad must have taken a large gulp of grappa and suddenly thought about what would happen if he was holding a gun at that moment.
i_love_kate
+0 -1
What scares me is that he misspelled "Defence".
What scares me is that he misspelled "Defence".
tekende
+1 -1
"Defense" is a perfectly valid spelling.
"Defense" is a perfectly valid spelling.
tellumo
+1 -0
I'll make you a deal. You don't whine about the American spellings in American comics, I won't whine about the British spellings in British comics. Deal?
I'll make you a deal. You don't whine about the American spellings in American comics, I won't whine about the British spellings in British comics. Deal?
gitarooman
+0 -0
So many pedantic assholes in this thread, I've given away about twice as many lames as on any other comic. I am not sure how I feel about this.
So many pedantic assholes in this thread, I've given away about twice as many lames as on any other comic. I am not sure how I feel about this.
centipede_damascus
+4 -0
Nobody should ever let Pat near a gun.
Nobody should ever let Pat near a gun.
dppolk
+0 -0
everytime someone shoots someone rollerskates are involved. what is up with that?
everytime someone shoots someone rollerskates are involved. what is up with that?
mat4900
+2 -2
ALT TEXT: The grappa defense
ALT TEXT: The grappa defense
hellofditties
+0 -0
Why is it spelt that way? I don't understand.
Why is it spelt that way? I don't understand.
fallow_fields
+0 -0
my guess is because mat4900 is from the USA and therefore prefers that spelling to the more British "defenCe"
Unless you meant 'grappa' in which case, that's just how it's spelled. Maybe you prefer to spell it like I do... N-A-S-T-Y
my guess is because mat4900 is from the USA and therefore prefers that spelling to the more British "defenCe"
Unless you meant 'grappa' in which case, that's just how it's spelled. Maybe you prefer to spell it like I do... N-A-S-T-Y
deancain29
+0 -0
A comment left by deancain29 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Mangtastic, _cheesekayke, BillyLK, Darthemed)
A comment left by deancain29 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Mangtastic, _cheesekayke, BillyLK, Darthemed)
taiiga
+0 -0
pat's expression in last panel = reason i got into achewood
pat's expression in last panel = reason i got into achewood
rowboat
+0 -0
Your comment....you avatar....my god! You're a Pat lover! How do you sleep at night?
Your comment....you avatar....my god! You're a Pat lover! How do you sleep at night?
taiiga
+0 -0
fun fact: my name is actually pat irl (seriously)
answer to your question: i don't
fun fact: my name is actually pat irl (seriously)
answer to your question: i don't
hipjiverobot
+1 -0
At least Roast Beef didn't get shot this time.
...yet.
At least Roast Beef didn't get shot this time.
...yet.
imbeta
+0 -1
I JUST signed-up... and I have been reading this from the start. So... in reality, I've read more than 1 strip. OK?
I JUST signed-up... and I have been reading this from the start. So... in reality, I've read more than 1 strip. OK?
zem
+0 -0
cool
cool
evilernieuk
+0 -0
Pat's face in the final panel is priceless.
Pat's face in the final panel is priceless.
xiaomimi
+18 -0
Weekend Blogs
Lyle: I am locked in a girl's school.
Today's Blogs
Lyle: Pizza at tea.
Weekend Blogs
Lyle: I am locked in a girl's school.
Today's Blogs
Lyle: Pizza at tea.
iseedeadpixels
+1 -0
You are awesome.
You are awesome.
heccibiggs
+2 -0
Ahahahaha, a readable Lyle blog entry. That genuinely shocked me.
Ahahahaha, a readable Lyle blog entry. That genuinely shocked me.
mattylite
+0 -0
Ya, me too. I love when you get glimpses like that of what Lyle is like underneath all that... Lyle. Like this one.
Ya, me too. I love when you get glimpses like that of what Lyle is like underneath all that... Lyle. Like this one.
tekende
+0 -0
I'm a little disturbed by how detailed his recall is. Does he have OCD?
I'm a little disturbed by how detailed his recall is. Does he have OCD?
gopacapulco
+0 -0
man FUCK pat
man FUCK pat
beansdooma
+1 -0
the thing about this strip that makes me hate Pat the most is that he just takes the wine from Mr. Bear.
What a dick.
the thing about this strip that makes me hate Pat the most is that he just takes the wine from Mr. Bear.
What a dick.
drago25
+0 -0
NOOOO - Mr. Bear finally comes back and gets riddled with bullets? Dang. I'd be upset if I didn't think Pat would soon get his come-uppance
NOOOO - Mr. Bear finally comes back and gets riddled with bullets? Dang. I'd be upset if I didn't think Pat would soon get his come-uppance
patkun
+1 -0
That Grappa must be powerful stuff. His coughs seem to be louder than the gunshots...
That Grappa must be powerful stuff. His coughs seem to be louder than the gunshots...
unsentletter
+0 -0
There're few of the main folks in Achewood who haven't died or caught-a-bullet yet...
There're few of the main folks in Achewood who haven't died or caught-a-bullet yet...
i_love_kate
+5 -0
The raw clincher for this strip is that, not only is Pat enough of a dick just to grab the dude's beverage, but he does so by placing the thumb on the inside of the glass
The manslaughter is just the dark icing on the malevolent cake.
The raw clincher for this strip is that, not only is Pat enough of a dick just to grab the dude's beverage, but he does so by placing the thumb on the inside of the glass
The manslaughter is just the dark icing on the malevolent cake.
i_love_kate
+2 -0
I don't remember writing this. Did someone else write this one for me? It's pretty good, so thanks.
I don't remember writing this. Did someone else write this one for me? It's pretty good, so thanks.
perilon
+0 -0
Upon "sober" reflection I still don't know what "toast the old cage" means. The saying is perfectly in character for Cornelius - I can hear him saying just that - but what the hey folks? Is he toasting his continued longevity, referring jokingly to his corporeal form as a cage for the soul, which shall receive sweet release in its due time? OR WHAT?
Upon "sober" reflection I still don't know what "toast the old cage" means. The saying is perfectly in character for Cornelius - I can hear him saying just that - but what the hey folks? Is he toasting his continued longevity, referring jokingly to his corporeal form as a cage for the soul, which shall receive sweet release in its due time? OR WHAT?
edwell
+1 -0
"Warm the old ribcage" was my guess.
"Warm the old ribcage" was my guess.
fallow_fields
+0 -0
this is my interpretation as well.
this is my interpretation as well.
chloraloner
+1 -0
Nothing toasts a cage like hot lead.
Nothing toasts a cage like hot lead.
envika
+1 -0
napoleon defeated the royalists with a whiff of grappashot on october 5th, 1795...
napoleon defeated the royalists with a whiff of grappashot on october 5th, 1795...
zapatos
+0 -0
Fuck you Pat, I hope Nice Pete murders you.
Fuck you Pat, I hope Nice Pete murders you.
dasilodavi
+0 -0
in six panels, Pat does the following:
Lies; insults; steals; takes a person's beverage; fires a deadly weapon into someone; fails to call 911.
I swear I want to kick this fucking cat!
in six panels, Pat does the following:
Lies; insults; steals; takes a person's beverage; fires a deadly weapon into someone; fails to call 911.
I swear I want to kick this fucking cat!
carlyle
+0 -0
Cornelius seems to be the only one who can stand Pat, but I am sensing some thinly veiled annoyance in panel.
Cornelius seems to be the only one who can stand Pat, but I am sensing some thinly veiled annoyance in panel.
lolsworth
+0 -0
By the second or third time you accidentally shoot someone dead I think you have a problem
By the second or third time you accidentally shoot someone dead I think you have a problem
ravindra108
+0 -0
GOD DAMN, Pat is a dick!
GOD DAMN, Pat is a dick!
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
it takes a good writer to invent a character that people feel outright hatred towards. mr onstad, i hate pat and its all your fault because you are a fucking genius.
it takes a good writer to invent a character that people feel outright hatred towards. mr onstad, i hate pat and its all your fault because you are a fucking genius.
atypicaloracle
+0 -0
It ain't hard to hate Pat. His major defining feature as a character is best summed up as "He's a psychotic asshole." Like Todd, he's not particularly complicated, nor especially interesting. He's not just an asshole, he is an asshole with this absolutely ferocious hemorrhoid spreading fiery misery wherever he goes. Most people just loathe him on instinct. What makes him especially awful is that most people know, or have known, a Pat.
It ain't hard to hate Pat. His major defining feature as a character is best summed up as "He's a psychotic asshole." Like Todd, he's not particularly complicated, nor especially interesting. He's not just an asshole, he is an asshole with this absolutely ferocious hemorrhoid spreading fiery misery wherever he goes. Most people just loathe him on instinct. What makes him especially awful is that most people know, or have known, a Pat.
kalethan
+0 -0
'toasting the old cage' is in this case certainly a euphemism for getting all hizzety from Mixing, putting flame to a smokable substance even as you proceed to imbibe some form of intoxicating beverage. Combining one's plant based pleasures isn't a 1 1=2 sort of a deal...they interact
'toasting the old cage' is in this case certainly a euphemism for getting all hizzety from Mixing, putting flame to a smokable substance even as you proceed to imbibe some form of intoxicating beverage. Combining one's plant based pleasures isn't a 1 1=2 sort of a deal...they interact
link
+0 -0
Pat is one serious asshole.
Pat is one serious asshole.
When I saw the roller skate in the second panel, I definitely thought Pat was going to slip on it and shoot Cornelius. Nice red herring, Onstad.
The rollerskate is the black spot of Achewood
or the oranges.
That is the skate that killed the fry! o_o
It is the herald of Death.
It was around when Ray shot Beef, as well. The skate is cursed!
It shows up when you want someone to Die
Mostly, it's Pat that shows up when you want someone to die. Why the hell do they keep talking to that dick, let alone letting him have weapons? He's a walking PSA for anti-gun legislation.
Good observation.
Indeed. Chekhov be damned.