lateadopter
+0 -0
A comment left by lateadopter was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gogobrent, goocifer, Zem, scraggg)
A comment left by lateadopter was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gogobrent, goocifer, Zem, scraggg)
neonaoneo
+2 -1
I thought Mr. Bear more classy than to drink Southern Comfort.
This is what it does to you.
I thought Mr. Bear more classy than to drink Southern Comfort.
This is what it does to you.
gormster
+0 -0
Anyone notice that Cornelius sleeps with his glasses on? That's... weird.
Then again, I've passed out with them on. Maybe it's not a regular thing.
Anyone notice that Cornelius sleeps with his glasses on? That's... weird.
Then again, I've passed out with them on. Maybe it's not a regular thing.
mightymeliel
+1 -0
I don't know, I tend to sleep with my glasses on regularly. Not being drunk. Normally . It runs in the family.
I don't know, I tend to sleep with my glasses on regularly. Not being drunk. Normally . It runs in the family.
spectre
+1 -0
I've gone to bed == "passed out" would be more accurate -- with my glasses on. It is Not Good. In the morning your ears hurt and if you roll around in the night you will bend the frames.
I've gone to bed == "passed out" would be more accurate -- with my glasses on. It is Not Good. In the morning your ears hurt and if you roll around in the night you will bend the frames.
vreeeee
+3 -0
Don't forget, Cornelius is a stuffed bear. It's possible the glasses aren't detachable.
(cue someone posting links to seven comics where he indeed takes them off)
Don't forget, Cornelius is a stuffed bear. It's possible the glasses aren't detachable.
(cue someone posting links to seven comics where he indeed takes them off)
susurrus
+2 -0
hmmm... since he's stuffed, maybe the tattoo is simply embroidered... he can remove the threads.
hmmm... since he's stuffed, maybe the tattoo is simply embroidered... he can remove the threads.
retinarow
+3 -0
They're not glasses! It's a pince-nez!
They're not glasses! It's a pince-nez!
weekendofsound
+0 -0
I actually found it more surprising that he doesn't wear classier PJ's. Like, something frilly, but that could still win the badass games and fuck shit up.
I actually found it more surprising that he doesn't wear classier PJ's. Like, something frilly, but that could still win the badass games and fuck shit up.
quinlaenar
+0 -0
Well, you have to take into account the fact that he was drunk.
Well, you have to take into account the fact that he was drunk.
weekendofsound
+3 -0
A gentleman does not skimp on his linens.
A gentleman does not skimp on his linens.
epicurus
+6 -0
I drank Southern Comfort once. It turned my normally talkative and jovial drunk into an angry and morose one. I think I actually tried to make a confederate flag by staining a paper towel in certain ways.
I drank Southern Comfort once. It turned my normally talkative and jovial drunk into an angry and morose one. I think I actually tried to make a confederate flag by staining a paper towel in certain ways.
wae
+6 -0
Magnus Intactus: NOT impressed.
Magnus Intactus: NOT impressed.
spinynorman
+48 -0
One time I had a friend who got drunk downtown and woke up with a tattoo bandage on his upper arm. He had no idea what it was, and no one else did, either. He had just gotten hammered, wandered off, and had someone write in his goddamn flesh.
Anyways, you can't take the tattoo bandage off for a while, otherwise you'll really fuck shit up, so he had to sit around sweating and wondering just what the fuck he got. Was is MOM? Was it a picture of a naked chick in a top hat, thus ensuring unemployment in any decent job? Was it just some random chick's name?
Eventually he got it off.
...It was Yosemite Sam, guns drawn and blazing in all of his Looney Tunes glory.
To be honest, he got off lucky.
One time I had a friend who got drunk downtown and woke up with a tattoo bandage on his upper arm. He had no idea what it was, and no one else did, either. He had just gotten hammered, wandered off, and had someone write in his goddamn flesh.
Anyways, you can't take the tattoo bandage off for a while, otherwise you'll really fuck shit up, so he had to sit around sweating and wondering just what the fuck he got. Was is MOM? Was it a picture of a naked chick in a top hat, thus ensuring unemployment in any decent job? Was it just some random chick's name?
Eventually he got it off.
...It was Yosemite Sam, guns drawn and blazing in all of his Looney Tunes glory.
To be honest, he got off lucky.
wae
+1 -0
I think I'd be pretty ok with that, especially after a few days' suspense.
I think I'd be pretty ok with that, especially after a few days' suspense.
therictus
+1 -2
that actually sounds like a cool tattoo
that actually sounds like a cool tattoo
neitherman
+17 -0
Lucky for him he didn't see this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDS6UQpssSg
and end up with something akin to this:
[IMGS OFF]
Lucky for him he didn't see this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XDS6UQpssSg
and end up with something akin to this:
[IMGS OFF]
killingthejay
+0 -0
Wait till he sees it, he is gonna FUH-REAK OUT!
Wait till he sees it, he is gonna FUH-REAK OUT!
hexirex21
+0 -0
I almost shat myself when I saw that... it's got every detail.
I almost shat myself when I saw that... it's got every detail.
tenthman
+0 -0
I have "mom" tattooed on my chest. wild.
I have "mom" tattooed on my chest. wild.
boscostacy
+0 -0
A comment left by boscostacy was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Vreeeee, msucaba, Wolfslice)
A comment left by boscostacy was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Vreeeee, msucaba, Wolfslice)
jackparsons
+7 -1
I had your mom on my chest last night.
I had your mom on my chest last night.
tekende
+2 -1
I took a dump on your mom's chest last night
I took a dump on your mom's chest last night
soticoto
+0 -0
You're doing it wrong.
I do it right.
("It" in the latter case being your mother, and "right" in the latter case being "right now".)
You're doing it wrong.
I do it right.
("It" in the latter case being your mother, and "right" in the latter case being "right now".)
nevlik
+1 -0
This post reminds me of tattoo bandages, which Cornelius did not have upon waking. I am therefore persuaded to the conclusion that this tattoo is a fake that the illustrious Mr. Bear is too hung over and confused to realize he can remove.
This post reminds me of tattoo bandages, which Cornelius did not have upon waking. I am therefore persuaded to the conclusion that this tattoo is a fake that the illustrious Mr. Bear is too hung over and confused to realize he can remove.
slab64
+1 -0
My dad had a Yosemite Sam tattoo.
What an asshole.
My dad had a Yosemite Sam tattoo.
What an asshole.
roomba
+2 -1
yeah, I'd think cornelius would be more of a star trek man.
yeah, I'd think cornelius would be more of a star trek man.
thegrapist
+14 -0
no one must
EVER
KNOW
Mr.Bear cried.
Dignity is the only thing a man has.
no one must
EVER
KNOW
Mr.Bear cried.
Dignity is the only thing a man has.
cpnglxynchos
+37 -0
NO photo! Absolutely there is NONE!
NO photo! Absolutely there is NONE!
saint
+8 -1
A real badass isn't afraid to breakdown and cry.
if someone calls him on it, he will simply rearrange their shoulder blades.
A real badass isn't afraid to breakdown and cry.
if someone calls him on it, he will simply rearrange their shoulder blades.
themacktruck
+8 -0
Fair enough, but what happens when the next 15 frames go something along the lines of, "A BLOOOOO BLAH! BLOO BLOO! BLAH BLOOOO!"
Fair enough, but what happens when the next 15 frames go something along the lines of, "A BLOOOOO BLAH! BLOO BLOO! BLAH BLOOOO!"
combustache
+4 -0
Naw, he's mad-classy when he sobs.
Unlike Ray, who just can't handle any level of sadness above "bummed out."
Cornelius embraces his sadness like a long-lost friend.
Naw, he's mad-classy when he sobs.
Unlike Ray, who just can't handle any level of sadness above "bummed out."
Cornelius embraces his sadness like a long-lost friend.
shogun
+4 -0
Allow me to relieve you of that located shoulder.
Allow me to relieve you of that located shoulder.
thegrapist
+0 -1
Nope. Sorry. Pussy's cry. Ask Mickey Spillane
Nope. Sorry. Pussy's cry. Ask Mickey Spillane
lamewad
+0 -0
P.S. Your avatar deserves a chub.
P.S. Your avatar deserves a chub.
spinynorman
+0 -0
To quote Rex Stout, dignity is no sooner lost than when one attempts to keep or maintain it.
To quote Rex Stout, dignity is no sooner lost than when one attempts to keep or maintain it.
rhino
+5 -0
that
that was really sad
that
that was really sad
tekende
+0 -0
And Klaus Kinski knows sad.
And Klaus Kinski knows sad.
abbazaba
+1 -0
NO ONE MUST EVER KNOW THE SADDEST THING.
NO ONE MUST EVER KNOW THE SADDEST THING.
rjt210
+0 -2
one of the few achewoods to actually make me tear up. poor cornelius!
however, if he were to get a tattoo accidentally, that is one of the most awesome ones he could get.
one of the few achewoods to actually make me tear up. poor cornelius!
however, if he were to get a tattoo accidentally, that is one of the most awesome ones he could get.
pierceg
+13 -0
This is the worst tattoo I could possibly imagine. Perhaps this is why Cornelius is so upset.
This is the worst tattoo I could possibly imagine. Perhaps this is why Cornelius is so upset.
drskradley
+37 -1
No no, there are worse. This is pretty bad, but I've heard of only one worse one....
*dramatic music of story telling*
A friend of mine (we'll call him Stan for anonymity*) worked with a guy in car detaling. Every day this guy would work with long sleeves on under his work jumpsuit, even in the hot hot Melbourne summer**. Then when they all got changed, he changed by himself, and Stan never got to see.
Stan obviously wondered what this dude's story was, 'cause it'd have to be fuckin' serious . Was he a cutter? Was it a tat? It's gotta be a tat. Nasty ass one.
So he asked a workmate what the deal was, and he said that yeah, he'd seen it, and yeah, it's a tat. Apparently the story was he got horrendously drunk one night and thought a tat was a good idea. I love stories that start this way. He wakes up the next morning with...a troll doll up his left arm. Body up the forearm, bright pink hair up till the shoulder. Yeah, he covers it up.
And that, my friend, is the worst tattoo I've ever damn heard of.
*The anonymity is not needed.
**Which could quickly change to a cold cold Melbourne winter in about 10 minutes, but that's another meteorological story for another non-tattoo related day.
No no, there are worse. This is pretty bad, but I've heard of only one worse one....
*dramatic music of story telling*
A friend of mine (we'll call him Stan for anonymity*) worked with a guy in car detaling. Every day this guy would work with long sleeves on under his work jumpsuit, even in the hot hot Melbourne summer**. Then when they all got changed, he changed by himself, and Stan never got to see.
Stan obviously wondered what this dude's story was, 'cause it'd have to be fuckin' serious . Was he a cutter? Was it a tat? It's gotta be a tat. Nasty ass one.
So he asked a workmate what the deal was, and he said that yeah, he'd seen it, and yeah, it's a tat. Apparently the story was he got horrendously drunk one night and thought a tat was a good idea. I love stories that start this way. He wakes up the next morning with...a troll doll up his left arm. Body up the forearm, bright pink hair up till the shoulder. Yeah, he covers it up.
And that, my friend, is the worst tattoo I've ever damn heard of.
*The anonymity is not needed.
**Which could quickly change to a cold cold Melbourne winter in about 10 minutes, but that's another meteorological story for another non-tattoo related day.
pierceg
+6 -0
A troll is bad. Very bad. Note how ironic tattoos haven't really caught on. I think most people recognise that they don't want to be ironic until the day they die.
A guy my friend knows has the Nike swoosh. It is apparently pretty common around here. I would consider that pretty bad, especially given that people get it sober.
A troll is bad. Very bad. Note how ironic tattoos haven't really caught on. I think most people recognise that they don't want to be ironic until the day they die.
A guy my friend knows has the Nike swoosh. It is apparently pretty common around here. I would consider that pretty bad, especially given that people get it sober.
gormster
+0 -0
Amen re: Melbourne weather. This is why I live in Sydney - beautiful one day, perfect the next... then torrential rain for a week, but after that, great.
Amen re: Melbourne weather. This is why I live in Sydney - beautiful one day, perfect the next... then torrential rain for a week, but after that, great.
drskradley
+1 -0
Bah, you Sydney-ites got it too easy. We gotta be bred smart down here. You gotta damn well ready for anything when you live in Melbourne.
I take a black hoody everywhere. It was 31 today and I took a black hoody with me.
Bah, you Sydney-ites got it too easy. We gotta be bred smart down here. You gotta damn well ready for anything when you live in Melbourne.
I take a black hoody everywhere. It was 31 today and I took a black hoody with me.
awko
+5 -0
I solve Melbourne's weather problems by wearing shorts under my pants.
Sure I look like a tool with a pair of jeans tied around my waist, but sometimes you gotta make sacrifices for comfort, ya dig?
I solve Melbourne's weather problems by wearing shorts under my pants.
Sure I look like a tool with a pair of jeans tied around my waist, but sometimes you gotta make sacrifices for comfort, ya dig?
camrock
+0 -0
This, for the uninitiated, is why outdoor shows in Melbourne generally resemble the boarding of a troop ship.
This, for the uninitiated, is why outdoor shows in Melbourne generally resemble the boarding of a troop ship.
blarghamagarky
+12 -1
This is nowhere near as bad as a troll, but.
A friend of mine, home from his freshman year of college during what was probably a Christmas/Thanksgiving break, was sitting around my house with some friends, pretty drunk. And he just goes, "So one night, I was pretty drunk, and I got this!"
[IMGS OFF]
(He reads achewood and I hope he sees this, also)
This is nowhere near as bad as a troll, but.
A friend of mine, home from his freshman year of college during what was probably a Christmas/Thanksgiving break, was sitting around my house with some friends, pretty drunk. And he just goes, "So one night, I was pretty drunk, and I got this!"
[IMGS OFF]
(He reads achewood and I hope he sees this, also)
blarghamagarky
+2 -1
also to clarify this picture is from that moment exactly.
also to clarify this picture is from that moment exactly.
neonfreon
+3 -1
o you totally just ruined his life. do you know how many important people read achewood and will now know that this does these kinds of immoral things?
o you totally just ruined his life. do you know how many important people read achewood and will now know that this does these kinds of immoral things?
blarghamagarky
+3 -0
I refuse to think that most important people are moral
I refuse to think that most important people are moral
ttagxamm
+7 -0
Only hearsay, but I've read of a tattoo on the small of a young woman's back of Elmer Fudd on tippy toe, shotgun in hand, following a dotted trail leading straight down towards the girl's, ahem, rabbit hole. That's pretty horrible.
Only hearsay, but I've read of a tattoo on the small of a young woman's back of Elmer Fudd on tippy toe, shotgun in hand, following a dotted trail leading straight down towards the girl's, ahem, rabbit hole. That's pretty horrible.
drskradley
+0 -0
A comment left by drskradley was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by riotdejaneiro, GSurge, wittyname, Combustache, Doc_Rostov)
A comment left by drskradley was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by riotdejaneiro, GSurge, wittyname, Combustache, Doc_Rostov)
silentman
+0 -0
I don't usually throw around the word "worst" like some chewed-up Nerf football, but I'm afraid this may be far, far worse than any movie franchise logo.
I don't usually throw around the word "worst" like some chewed-up Nerf football, but I'm afraid this may be far, far worse than any movie franchise logo.
drskradley
+0 -0
Particularly the lack of cleanliness on said bottom. It's just gross.
Particularly the lack of cleanliness on said bottom. It's just gross.
spinynorman
+2 -0
Aw, come on, I mean fuck
Aw, come on, I mean fuck
stopeatingmyeyes
+2 -0
that cannot belong to a lady
it just cannot
that cannot belong to a lady
it just cannot
cousinted
+2 -0
It's probably a rabbit in drag.
It's probably a rabbit in drag.
gogobrent
+1 -1
do not want.
do not want.
_cheesekayke
+1 -0
that person needs some wipes. that is just disgusting.
that person needs some wipes. that is just disgusting.
lastlarf
+14 -0
OK guys. I know a girl who has, right across her lower back, the word "PWNED". No joke.
That is the worst tattoo ever, and maybe also the saddest thing.
OK guys. I know a girl who has, right across her lower back, the word "PWNED". No joke.
That is the worst tattoo ever, and maybe also the saddest thing.
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
out of all the ones listed so far, that is defintely the worst.
out of all the ones listed so far, that is defintely the worst.
booger
+0 -0
i will interject to agree that this is indeed the worst tattoo ever.
i will interject to agree that this is indeed the worst tattoo ever.
blarghamagarky
+1 -0
I have a friend with a "Pot Master" tattoo, (He is a ceramicist and an also an idiot) it's really hard to discern what it actually says, and awhile ago in one of his classes some girl was bothering him about it, and he said "IT SAYS MONSTERS INC OK!" She believed him.
I have a friend with a "Pot Master" tattoo, (He is a ceramicist and an also an idiot) it's really hard to discern what it actually says, and awhile ago in one of his classes some girl was bothering him about it, and he said "IT SAYS MONSTERS INC OK!" She believed him.
slab64
+4 -0
You need to know better people.
You need to know better people.
blarghamagarky
+2 -0
...yeah. Yeah. It's a thing
...yeah. Yeah. It's a thing
ricnine
+0 -0
Agreed that it does not get much more terrible than that.
Agreed that it does not get much more terrible than that.
joestork
+0 -0
hot!
hot!
inspector_34
+10 -0
This tattoo goes from worst to awesome when we all discover that she has AIDS.
This tattoo goes from worst to awesome when we all discover that she has AIDS.
lastlarf
+0 -0
I chubby this, because the girl in question is known to be a terrible bitch. Plus she is a slag.
I chubby this, because the girl in question is known to be a terrible bitch. Plus she is a slag.
spinynorman
+12 -0
I still like this one:
[IMGS OFF]
I still like this one:
[IMGS OFF]
_cheesekayke
+1 -1
Now in 50 years, when the grandkids ask her what the fuck this Ray Romano guy did to her, and she has to explain that Ray Romano is in fact a sitcom star from back in the day, and that trust her, it was clever and hip back then, she's not gonna appreciate the joke so much.
Now in 50 years, when the grandkids ask her what the fuck this Ray Romano guy did to her, and she has to explain that Ray Romano is in fact a sitcom star from back in the day, and that trust her, it was clever and hip back then, she's not gonna appreciate the joke so much.
boredom_man
+0 -0
I've never heard of him.
I've never heard of him.
gumfish
+1 -0
You blessed virgin soul.
You blessed virgin soul.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
"Poing!"
"Poing!"
telephone1652
+0 -0
I knew a guy who got a Pink Floyd lyric tattooed as an armband... wait for it... in Japanese characters!
It said "I sentence you to be judged by a jury of your peers". Yikes!
I knew a guy who got a Pink Floyd lyric tattooed as an armband... wait for it... in Japanese characters!
It said "I sentence you to be judged by a jury of your peers". Yikes!
fablesandblues
+3 -0
This is not nearly as bad as Lyle%u2019s Chevy tattoo. Or the imagined two-panel one Todd supposedly has.
This is not nearly as bad as Lyle%u2019s Chevy tattoo. Or the imagined two-panel one Todd supposedly has.
fablesandblues
+1 -0
I wonder why all these tattoos are chest tattoos.
I wonder why all these tattoos are chest tattoos.
lizard
+0 -0
Probably because they're front and centre in acts of great intimacy. The worst tattoo, in the worst location.
Probably because they're front and centre in acts of great intimacy. The worst tattoo, in the worst location.
mattfish
+3 -0
I always thought Lyle's Chevy was just sculpted out of his chest hair, for some reason.
I always thought Lyle's Chevy was just sculpted out of his chest hair, for some reason.
ttagxamm
+1 -0
Read this as Chewy tattoo at first, and was wondering why I didn't remember this previous Star Wars themed body art.
Read this as Chewy tattoo at first, and was wondering why I didn't remember this previous Star Wars themed body art.
mrblank91
+0 -0
A comment left by mrblank91 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by illgamesh, goodgravy, tokyogirl119)
A comment left by mrblank91 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by illgamesh, goodgravy, tokyogirl119)
mrblank91
+5 -0
What the dickens, lamed by 2 people who have never made a single comment!? Suck my yam.
What the dickens, lamed by 2 people who have never made a single comment!? Suck my yam.
ritardomontabum
+0 -0
The effort's there but they're not comparing anything I would describe as a "you-know-what". You were getting there but decided to hold back.
The effort's there but they're not comparing anything I would describe as a "you-know-what". You were getting there but decided to hold back.
mrblank91
+0 -0
Yes I did think about this, but I think it would just ruin the subtlety of it. The second panel is sort of like them just about to get their cocks out. Who am I to speculate on the penis size of the original 'cock rockers'.
Yes I did think about this, but I think it would just ruin the subtlety of it. The second panel is sort of like them just about to get their cocks out. Who am I to speculate on the penis size of the original 'cock rockers'.
zapatos
+0 -0
I think they just hold the yam in front of their respective crotches, pointing and laughing, "yeaaah"
I think they just hold the yam in front of their respective crotches, pointing and laughing, "yeaaah"
goosey
+2 -0
Worse than a two panel tattoo of KISS going to the grocery store and then comparing their you-know-whats to the yams?
Worse than a two panel tattoo of KISS going to the grocery store and then comparing their you-know-whats to the yams?
talix18
+12 -0
I have a friend who got a tattoo - on his neck - in memory of his recently deceased nephew. The tattoo says "In loveing memory..." That, if not the saddest thing, is pretty damn sad.
I have a friend who got a tattoo - on his neck - in memory of his recently deceased nephew. The tattoo says "In loveing memory..." That, if not the saddest thing, is pretty damn sad.
illuminatedwax
+8 -0
Worse than a tattoo of Bowser surfing with sunglasses playing a double necked guitar in front of a pot leaf in front of a cross with the text "Happy Birthday Rick"?
It's hard to say. One can appreciate the horrific simplicity of "Star Wars" on your chest.
Worse than a tattoo of Bowser surfing with sunglasses playing a double necked guitar in front of a pot leaf in front of a cross with the text "Happy Birthday Rick"?
It's hard to say. One can appreciate the horrific simplicity of "Star Wars" on your chest.
neitherman
+0 -0
Oh DAMMIT... now I feel like a tool.
Oh DAMMIT... now I feel like a tool.
anitrophaeron
+0 -0
Not as much of a tool as the guy who got that tattoo!
Not as much of a tool as the guy who got that tattoo!
bjorntd
+1 -0
I think you guys are confusing "worst" with "awesome".
It is a common error.
I think you guys are confusing "worst" with "awesome".
It is a common error.
tim_simmons
+0 -0
yeah there is so much shit going on in that tat it cannot not be awesome. its like a gift card that caters for every occasion, including 'sorry for your loss' and 'hey its just cancer, you'll be sweet!'
yeah there is so much shit going on in that tat it cannot not be awesome. its like a gift card that caters for every occasion, including 'sorry for your loss' and 'hey its just cancer, you'll be sweet!'
misterkoss
+0 -0
A friend once told me about a guy who, while drunk on a Spring Break trip, got the word 'Devirginizer' tattooed across his upper back from shoulder to shoulder. I don't know if this really happened, but if it did, I am convinced it is at or near the top of the Worst Tattoo list.
A friend once told me about a guy who, while drunk on a Spring Break trip, got the word 'Devirginizer' tattooed across his upper back from shoulder to shoulder. I don't know if this really happened, but if it did, I am convinced it is at or near the top of the Worst Tattoo list.
abbazaba
+1 -0
who WAS the real foul scoundrel that paired Southern Comfort with lemonade?
who WAS the real foul scoundrel that paired Southern Comfort with lemonade?
philosophe
+1 -0
Ray.
Ray.
vreeeee
+17 -0
Ray is a being of style, but no class.
Ray is a being of style, but no class.
philosophe
+0 -0
Excellently put!
Excellently put!
boredom_man
+1 -0
I know I met him, but I can't remember when or where.
I know I met him, but I can't remember when or where.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it seems like Téodor is admitting fault for that, doesn't it? him saying 'sorry' and all..?
it seems like Téodor is admitting fault for that, doesn't it? him saying 'sorry' and all..?
intelligentblue
+5 -0
I have that same tattoo. also one of R2-D2 on fire.
I have that same tattoo. also one of R2-D2 on fire.
bovine
+10 -0
you should do a Storm Trooper on the opposite side of your body firing his laser rifle. You know, kind of make a little story out of it.
you should do a Storm Trooper on the opposite side of your body firing his laser rifle. You know, kind of make a little story out of it.
cpnglxynchos
+6 -0
plus also a wookiee and a jawa comparing their you-know-whats to the yams.
plus also a wookiee and a jawa comparing their you-know-whats to the yams.
bovine
+7 -0
yeah and an x-wing flying up your leg to recreate the trench run. death star on ur ass cheeks.
yeah and an x-wing flying up your leg to recreate the trench run. death star on ur ass cheeks.
daily
+3 -0
Or just aiming toward his own "death star."
Or just aiming toward his own "death star."
rjt210
+1 -1
Also an Admiral Ackbar.
Also an Admiral Ackbar.
bovine
+5 -0
just one?!
just one?!
earendil
+7 -0
one for each nipple.
one for each nipple.
quantumcasaba
+0 -1
And perhaps the logo with Jar Jar's severed head flying through one of the A's.
And perhaps the logo with Jar Jar's severed head flying through one of the A's.
nbgreene
+0 -0
A comment left by nbgreene was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zem, lateadopter, sncether, HollyBones, neitherman)
A comment left by nbgreene was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zem, lateadopter, sncether, HollyBones, neitherman)
zem
+0 -0
5555
5555
fallow_fields
+0 -0
noooooo I have exhausted my supply of chubbies on (decidedly) less worthy comments
1 pseudo-chubby for you good sir
noooooo I have exhausted my supply of chubbies on (decidedly) less worthy comments
1 pseudo-chubby for you good sir
honesttom
+0 -0
I second the above.
I second the above.
slab64
+0 -0
Lamed for imaginary girlfriend.
(Pics or it never happened)
Lamed for imaginary girlfriend.
(Pics or it never happened)
intelligentblue
+0 -2
im planning on getting one that says "IT'S A TRAP!!!" underneath
im planning on getting one that says "IT'S A TRAP!!!" underneath
tekende
+0 -0
A comment left by tekende was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Bourbonsamurai, msucaba, HollyBones)
A comment left by tekende was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Bourbonsamurai, msucaba, HollyBones)
tekende
+0 -0
CRAP! The one thing I don't know how to do in bbcode.
CRAP! The one thing I don't know how to do in bbcode.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
just remove the quotes in your tag and you've got it.
...but you probably know that already.
just remove the quotes in your tag and you've got it.
...but you probably know that already.
tekende
+0 -0
Ah! Thanks.
Ah! Thanks.
tekende
+0 -2
Well, and this is just for starters, the wookiee penis is about as big around as my thigh...they can come at you with that thing, like a club, and if they do just watch out .
Well, and this is just for starters, the wookiee penis is about as big around as my thigh...they can come at you with that thing, like a club, and if they do just watch out .
abbazaba
+1 -0
Ray should show mercy
Ray should show mercy
tekende
+10 -0
The dude has got no mercy, sorry.
The dude has got no mercy, sorry.
synnah
+0 -0
This, surely, is the first time we see Cornelius in his boxers.
This, surely, is the first time we see Cornelius in his boxers.
mrflunchy
+4 -0
And, likely the last. The bear's bare-chested days are over.
And, likely the last. The bear's bare-chested days are over.
vreeeee
+5 -0
You can tell that this is the worst thing to happen to Cornelius since the death of his dear Iris Gambol.
You can tell that this is the worst thing to happen to Cornelius since the death of his dear Iris Gambol.
overmedicated
+4 -0
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua2XJp80
Highly inadvisable.
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua2XJp80
Highly inadvisable.
varnish
+1 -0
What a dark and hellish night that must have been, to result in a Cornelius getting a Star Wars tattoo.
What a dark and hellish night that must have been, to result in a Cornelius getting a Star Wars tattoo.
hexirex21
+2 -0
I never thought I'd laugh so hard at a grown bear crying.
I never thought I'd laugh so hard at a grown bear crying.
mrclarinet
+0 -0
A comment left by mrclarinet was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Khabuem, automin, nutmeg, HollyBones, arborwin, Doc_Rostov, lastlarf, clintisiceman, SPECTRE)
A comment left by mrclarinet was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Khabuem, automin, nutmeg, HollyBones, arborwin, Doc_Rostov, lastlarf, clintisiceman, SPECTRE)
clintisiceman
+22 -0
Or I could just tell you to go fuck yourself because Cornelius is the rudest dude.
Or I could just tell you to go fuck yourself because Cornelius is the rudest dude.
cpnglxynchos
+1 -1
THAT. IS. A. HOMEBOY.
(..right?)
THAT. IS. A. HOMEBOY.
(..right?)
mrclarinet
+0 -0
A comment left by mrclarinet was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by pwb, flazisismuss, msucaba)
A comment left by mrclarinet was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by pwb, flazisismuss, msucaba)
clintisiceman
+1 -1
YES IT IS! I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS SHIT!
YES IT IS! I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS SHIT!
redjoker
+0 -0
let's not jump to conclusions now my dear boy... he still has the option of manually removing his tatoo by applying the help of a grinding machine, scaring him in a manly fashion and probably for life and for the best
let's not jump to conclusions now my dear boy... he still has the option of manually removing his tatoo by applying the help of a grinding machine, scaring him in a manly fashion and probably for life and for the best
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Mad Magazine published a myriad of ways to remove tattoos a few years back, "The Rollerblade Ruboff" being one of them. (You rollerblade next to a brick building and scrape your tattoo off using the bricks as hardcore sandpaper.)
However, as Connie's is on his chest, he may prefer another method.
Mad Magazine published a myriad of ways to remove tattoos a few years back, "The Rollerblade Ruboff" being one of them. (You rollerblade next to a brick building and scrape your tattoo off using the bricks as hardcore sandpaper.)
However, as Connie's is on his chest, he may prefer another method.
mysterymeat1001
+69 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
boheeka
+0 -0
Wow, first time I've laughed out loud at achewood in a long time.
Thanks, Onstad, I needed this.
Wow, first time I've laughed out loud at achewood in a long time.
Thanks, Onstad, I needed this.
nyu
+2 -0
I guess thats one way to never get laid.
I guess thats one way to never get laid.
qingofchina
+0 -0
BEST!
BEST!
earendil
+0 -1
splut
splut
funkywankerbean
+1 -1
At least he got it while he was already old, so it won't get all wrinkly.
At least he got it while he was already old, so it won't get all wrinkly.
liquid_banjo
+0 -0
Poor Connie, as classy a dude as he is, he'l always have the mark of the unwashed upon him.
Poor Connie, as classy a dude as he is, he'l always have the mark of the unwashed upon him.
qwerty
+0 -0
Reminds me of a dude I know with a now very regrettable KORN tattoo on his chest. Just goes to show that there's always someone worse off.
Reminds me of a dude I know with a now very regrettable KORN tattoo on his chest. Just goes to show that there's always someone worse off.
earendil
+0 -0
I misread this at first as saying he had a PORN tattoo. That would also be inadvisable.
I misread this at first as saying he had a PORN tattoo. That would also be inadvisable.
chuvak
+7 -0
you say "now regrettable" as if it wasn't regrettable the very second ink touched flesh, nay, the VERY SECOND HE HATCHED THE IDIOT NOTION OF GETTING A KORN TAT.
you say "now regrettable" as if it wasn't regrettable the very second ink touched flesh, nay, the VERY SECOND HE HATCHED THE IDIOT NOTION OF GETTING A KORN TAT.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
pft. korn.
corn, however...
pft. korn.
corn, however...
ovenface
+3 -1
I had a friend who got a delicious corn tattoo. Now he has more friends than he can count, on account of everyone loving corn.
I had a friend who got a delicious corn tattoo. Now he has more friends than he can count, on account of everyone loving corn.
quantumcasaba
+2 -0
This strip is not only awesome, but has inspired some of the best AssetBanter that I've read in ages.
This strip is not only awesome, but has inspired some of the best AssetBanter that I've read in ages.
chuvak
+0 -0
That IS a good tat. By that logic, if I get a pumpkin pie tattoo, I'll be pretty popular.
Or, to get really deep, what if I just got a tattoo that said "Kindness"?
That IS a good tat. By that logic, if I get a pumpkin pie tattoo, I'll be pretty popular.
Or, to get really deep, what if I just got a tattoo that said "Kindness"?
usversusthem
+2 -0
You'd probably just be kind of a fag.
You'd probably just be kind of a fag.
slab64
+0 -0
Well, then he could tattoo the word "The" in front of it and say that it's a local band that he's a really big fan of.
Actually, no...still kind of a fag.
Well, then he could tattoo the word "The" in front of it and say that it's a local band that he's a really big fan of.
Actually, no...still kind of a fag.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Kindness is when one thing is kinda similar to another thing.
it has kindness towards it.
Kindness is when one thing is kinda similar to another thing.
it has kindness towards it.
honesttom
+0 -0
Dammit, there just aren't enough chubbies. Virtua-chubby for you, sir.
Dammit, there just aren't enough chubbies. Virtua-chubby for you, sir.
dovey
+0 -0
This is the Chubby I give when I am too friendly
This is the Chubby I give when I am too friendly
abc_heidi
+2 -0
This is like that time I saw my dad get spat on by a menacing short man. Same confused emotions.
This is like that time I saw my dad get spat on by a menacing short man. Same confused emotions.
dallovich
+1 -0
Nooooooo... Cornelius is my father figure, I can't watch him cry! Nooooo...
Nooooooo... Cornelius is my father figure, I can't watch him cry! Nooooo...
skoora
+0 -0
I normally don't laugh at old men crying, but...
I normally don't laugh at old men crying, but...
honesttom
+0 -0
My excuse is not that I am laughing at Cornelius, but laughing with joy that he is classy enough to... oh fuck it, I'm laughing at an old man crying.
My excuse is not that I am laughing at Cornelius, but laughing with joy that he is classy enough to... oh fuck it, I'm laughing at an old man crying.
avedestron
+2 -0
I for one would not mind that tattoo, but Mr. Bear is not the kind of man who takes lightly to wars among the stars.
I for one would not mind that tattoo, but Mr. Bear is not the kind of man who takes lightly to wars among the stars.
drskradley
+16 -1
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
quinlaenar
+0 -0
My uncle has a story of a co-worker who had the same thing happen with a Japanese tattoo.
My uncle has a story of a co-worker who had the same thing happen with a Japanese tattoo.
drskradley
+1 -0
I just noticed that the old lady in the background seems to be getting one above one of her hoo-hoos.
I just noticed that the old lady in the background seems to be getting one above one of her hoo-hoos.
shades
+0 -0
A comment left by shades was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Dovey, straw, biomusicologist, Smallberries, mikeD, equinn2006, _cheesekayke, Carrot, RicNine, Boyd, mrblank91, clintisiceman, sabata00, Mastronaut, SPECTRE, kb)
A comment left by shades was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Dovey, straw, biomusicologist, Smallberries, mikeD, equinn2006, _cheesekayke, Carrot, RicNine, Boyd, mrblank91, clintisiceman, sabata00, Mastronaut, SPECTRE, kb)
drskradley
+6 -0
Is disagreeing with you reason to lame you? You're entitled to your opinion, and I don't believe I've ever lamed you purely for saying that Achewood isn't punching with its full power anymore, but at the same time I feel you are attention seeking. However, you might not be.
However, you also write kinda lamely and over-antagonistically. But is that reason for laming? Ah the choices. I'll decide later.
Is disagreeing with you reason to lame you? You're entitled to your opinion, and I don't believe I've ever lamed you purely for saying that Achewood isn't punching with its full power anymore, but at the same time I feel you are attention seeking. However, you might not be.
However, you also write kinda lamely and over-antagonistically. But is that reason for laming? Ah the choices. I'll decide later.
shades
+0 -0
A comment left by shades was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, biomusicologist, silver_lake, leatherpants, Crev_Gibax, yingkaixing)
A comment left by shades was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, biomusicologist, silver_lake, leatherpants, Crev_Gibax, yingkaixing)
drskradley
+12 -1
Fair enough. I also don't get the chuckles like I used to with them, but they still make me smile - although, granted, not as often as I'd like them to.
That having been said, I think you're setting the old stuff up on too high a pedestal. Yeah, it was clever, but there was a HELL of a lot of toilet and/or dick jokes. And also pop culture references - not as many as most webcomics out there who churn them out like their lives depend on it, but they're still there. (I'd actually argue that the lack of pop culture references is what always made Achewood appealing. There were culture references, but often really obscure ones that made me feel inferior for not getting.) He's putting in a lot of all these sort of jokes lately, but at the same time, we also came off two stories off the top of my head that weren't - Todd's tv show, and Ray's brother. Todd's show was classic Todd being a cokehead jerkwad (to the extreme this time), and Ray's brother was more abstract interpersonal humour. The quality of either is up to the individual.
As for your writing style - eh, I think you come off as too aggressive to be taken seriously, in all honesty. There's a lot of trolls on the net, Acheworld included, and that's how they generally write - wanting to start a fight. If you weren't so aggressive and antagonistic in your posts you wouldn't get lamed to all hell like you do, I reckon.
Or maybe you would because you dare say that it's not up to standard, but not as much as you do. Depends what you want - internet respect (which, really, means nothing but gives you a buzz of feeling respected) or internet hate (which, really, means nothing but gives you a buzz from getting into fights). Either are understandable, but you can't whine about people laming you if that's what you want in the first place. Depends what you actually want, I suppose.
Fair enough. I also don't get the chuckles like I used to with them, but they still make me smile - although, granted, not as often as I'd like them to.
That having been said, I think you're setting the old stuff up on too high a pedestal. Yeah, it was clever, but there was a HELL of a lot of toilet and/or dick jokes. And also pop culture references - not as many as most webcomics out there who churn them out like their lives depend on it, but they're still there. (I'd actually argue that the lack of pop culture references is what always made Achewood appealing. There were culture references, but often really obscure ones that made me feel inferior for not getting.) He's putting in a lot of all these sort of jokes lately, but at the same time, we also came off two stories off the top of my head that weren't - Todd's tv show, and Ray's brother. Todd's show was classic Todd being a cokehead jerkwad (to the extreme this time), and Ray's brother was more abstract interpersonal humour. The quality of either is up to the individual.
As for your writing style - eh, I think you come off as too aggressive to be taken seriously, in all honesty. There's a lot of trolls on the net, Acheworld included, and that's how they generally write - wanting to start a fight. If you weren't so aggressive and antagonistic in your posts you wouldn't get lamed to all hell like you do, I reckon.
Or maybe you would because you dare say that it's not up to standard, but not as much as you do. Depends what you want - internet respect (which, really, means nothing but gives you a buzz of feeling respected) or internet hate (which, really, means nothing but gives you a buzz from getting into fights). Either are understandable, but you can't whine about people laming you if that's what you want in the first place. Depends what you actually want, I suppose.
drskradley
+0 -0
A comment left by drskradley was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Lonis, Sionar, Pseudochron, scraggg)
A comment left by drskradley was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Lonis, Sionar, Pseudochron, scraggg)
drskradley
+1 -2
And by that, I mean that I can sound hella pretentious. I do not want people to think I think I'm awesome, when I do not.
And by that, I mean that I can sound hella pretentious. I do not want people to think I think I'm awesome, when I do not.
chuvak
+2 -1
YOU PRETENTIOUS BASTARD. Ach, I agree about Achewood and cultural reference. I would like to put forward the idea that there is a right and wrong way to relate your comic to, or riff on, popular culture, and achewood does it, as it does so many things, the right way.
What really sets achewood apart for me is its carefully considered minimalism, the way it establishes a strong narrative voice in my head without having to spell out just what that voice sounds like.
YOU PRETENTIOUS BASTARD. Ach, I agree about Achewood and cultural reference. I would like to put forward the idea that there is a right and wrong way to relate your comic to, or riff on, popular culture, and achewood does it, as it does so many things, the right way.
What really sets achewood apart for me is its carefully considered minimalism, the way it establishes a strong narrative voice in my head without having to spell out just what that voice sounds like.
jamers
+0 -0
Well put! While some writers would try to make that voice overbearing in order to make absolutely sure it's established, they end up working against themselves as he voice turns out contrived and phony.
In Achewood, as you pointed out, the minimalism of the narration allows for the reader to 'absorb' the voice, and flesh out in his or her imagination what the narration leaves out, but hints at.
Well put! While some writers would try to make that voice overbearing in order to make absolutely sure it's established, they end up working against themselves as he voice turns out contrived and phony.
In Achewood, as you pointed out, the minimalism of the narration allows for the reader to 'absorb' the voice, and flesh out in his or her imagination what the narration leaves out, but hints at.
digdugz
+0 -0
Look at you, in that new shirt!
How could you BE so cocky?
You are so ARROGANT!
Look at you, in that new shirt!
How could you BE so cocky?
You are so ARROGANT!
nutmeg
+0 -0
Who do you think you are, putting on such airs!
Who do you think you are, putting on such airs!
atticusonline
+0 -0
you are awesome...you are.
Or to put it more succinctly: Are you awesome....are you?
HINT: Yes. The answer is yes.
you are awesome...you are.
Or to put it more succinctly: Are you awesome....are you?
HINT: Yes. The answer is yes.
odei
+1 -0
Good, honest discussion gives everyone chubbies.
Good, honest discussion gives everyone chubbies.
shoinan
+0 -0
I thought about getting involved, but then I remembered I had some kick-ass risotto in the fridge that I wanted to eat. That and it's just not that important. But what I will say is that for me (in my opinion, we're all allowed one right?) it's amusing that the Achewood RIP talk up there comes after what has been some of the strongest Achewood strips for a while. Merry xmas one and all.
I thought about getting involved, but then I remembered I had some kick-ass risotto in the fridge that I wanted to eat. That and it's just not that important. But what I will say is that for me (in my opinion, we're all allowed one right?) it's amusing that the Achewood RIP talk up there comes after what has been some of the strongest Achewood strips for a while. Merry xmas one and all.
shades
+0 -0
A comment left by shades was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, odei, woodenteeth, Jar, DrSkradley, vodkavonstroheim, yingkaixing, clintisiceman)
A comment left by shades was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, odei, woodenteeth, Jar, DrSkradley, vodkavonstroheim, yingkaixing, clintisiceman)
clintisiceman
+2 -0
Maybe this can shed some light on what he means:
"Completely stupid strip and if you like this strip you are bad and you should feel bad because this is terrible and not funny or good"
-You
Maybe this can shed some light on what he means:
"Completely stupid strip and if you like this strip you are bad and you should feel bad because this is terrible and not funny or good"
-You
shades
+0 -1
So he agrees with me. Great.
So he agrees with me. Great.
saint
+0 -0
NO CLASS.
NO.
CLASS.
NO CLASS.
NO.
CLASS.
drskradley
+0 -0
Ah, and now you show that you really just want a fight. Now I have reason to lame you.
Not saying that to sound scary, but you have now explained you're reasonings to me. It may have been indeliberate, but you did.
And that's very lame.
Ah, and now you show that you really just want a fight. Now I have reason to lame you.
Not saying that to sound scary, but you have now explained you're reasonings to me. It may have been indeliberate, but you did.
And that's very lame.
peterjoel
+3 -0
ok, so I have this problem. I think my girl's looking around, maybe cheating on me. But that could just be me being insecure. I feel like we don't talk anymore, but then what can we talk about? It's like it's all falling apart around me and I have nowhere to go. Nobody understands. I'm not exactly a 7 lemons kind of guy, but I know she doesn't need that. It used to be great, but now I just don't know. I don't even know what I want any more. Maybe nothing. Maybe I'll propose. She does the sweetest little things for me though... and it just makes me think she's acting guilty about something. She's actually not even that hot, and now maybe I'm the one looking around. Maybe she's picked up on that, and maybe that's why she's acting like she is. She calls me at work - she never used to do that! She's a good girl, probably the best - and she dotes on me. I don't deserve that. I can't even see what we have in common. I don't think I'm even attracted to her any more.
woah...
...thanks man. I think I solved it.
ok, so I have this problem. I think my girl's looking around, maybe cheating on me. But that could just be me being insecure. I feel like we don't talk anymore, but then what can we talk about? It's like it's all falling apart around me and I have nowhere to go. Nobody understands. I'm not exactly a 7 lemons kind of guy, but I know she doesn't need that. It used to be great, but now I just don't know. I don't even know what I want any more. Maybe nothing. Maybe I'll propose. She does the sweetest little things for me though... and it just makes me think she's acting guilty about something. She's actually not even that hot, and now maybe I'm the one looking around. Maybe she's picked up on that, and maybe that's why she's acting like she is. She calls me at work - she never used to do that! She's a good girl, probably the best - and she dotes on me. I don't deserve that. I can't even see what we have in common. I don't think I'm even attracted to her any more.
woah...
...thanks man. I think I solved it.
slab64
+1 -0
The fuck, man?
The fuck, man?
mjfitzge
+0 -0
you know i just started reading achewood a few months ago, and i read through them all one after another. now that i'm reading them one at a time i haven't found them quite as funny. still funny, and still my favorite comic, just not quite there.
i always assumed this was because i'm only getting one at a time now, but hearing people say stuff like this makes me wonder...
i'm really not too worried about it, i will always love achewood for that period of time in which i read through the first 1200 or so... i would favorably compare the experience to that of reading most of my favorite books even... just thinking about some of the good times i've had reading this strip, well dammit:
ACHEWOOD CAN DO NO WRONG!
you know i just started reading achewood a few months ago, and i read through them all one after another. now that i'm reading them one at a time i haven't found them quite as funny. still funny, and still my favorite comic, just not quite there.
i always assumed this was because i'm only getting one at a time now, but hearing people say stuff like this makes me wonder...
i'm really not too worried about it, i will always love achewood for that period of time in which i read through the first 1200 or so... i would favorably compare the experience to that of reading most of my favorite books even... just thinking about some of the good times i've had reading this strip, well dammit:
ACHEWOOD CAN DO NO WRONG!
augeno13
+0 -0
I think most people reading Achewood have the same experience to some degree: Reading a strip, getting hooked, racing through the archives. So I don't know that anyone saying "this isn't as funny as it used to be" is any more or less valid than your thinking so. By the same reasoning, we may all suffer from reading them one at a time now instead of all at once through the archives.
Is there anyone here who actually started reading on 10/1/01?
I think most people reading Achewood have the same experience to some degree: Reading a strip, getting hooked, racing through the archives. So I don't know that anyone saying "this isn't as funny as it used to be" is any more or less valid than your thinking so. By the same reasoning, we may all suffer from reading them one at a time now instead of all at once through the archives.
Is there anyone here who actually started reading on 10/1/01?
jamers
+0 -0
I think it is more an issue of rising expectations. With each incredible story arc, the bar is set higher and higher, until an 'average' strip becomes disappointing. It's a natural thing.
I think it is more an issue of rising expectations. With each incredible story arc, the bar is set higher and higher, until an 'average' strip becomes disappointing. It's a natural thing.
miku224
+0 -0
I started smack dab at the climax of the GOF. Here , to be precise. I don't think I could have started at a better place. I immediately read the GOF from the beginning, and then went through the whole archive. I don't think there's been a story arc since then that's been as funny. But that's probably just nostalgia and surprise talking.
I started smack dab at the climax of the GOF. Here , to be precise. I don't think I could have started at a better place. I immediately read the GOF from the beginning, and then went through the whole archive. I don't think there's been a story arc since then that's been as funny. But that's probably just nostalgia and surprise talking.
falseprophet
+1 -0
I am a starting web cartoonist and I decided I wanted to study the craft by following the best so even though I started reading Achewood a couple of months ago I went straight to the very first strip, not letting the home page finish loading all the way so I could experience it the way it was meant to be experienced Iced tea in hand, dripping condensation on my palms Soles in my foot bath Fresh from the shower, no bathrobe, sitting on my bed naked Laptop warming my balls...
I am a starting web cartoonist and I decided I wanted to study the craft by following the best so even though I started reading Achewood a couple of months ago I went straight to the very first strip, not letting the home page finish loading all the way so I could experience it the way it was meant to be experienced Iced tea in hand, dripping condensation on my palms Soles in my foot bath Fresh from the shower, no bathrobe, sitting on my bed naked Laptop warming my balls...
cousinted
+0 -0
WORDS!!!!
WORDS!!!!
baryonyx
+1 -0
With all this speculation of Achewood's decline, I foresee a sort of Acheworld civil war on the horizon...the Onstadite Inquisition against the Disatisfactist Rebellion.
With all this speculation of Achewood's decline, I foresee a sort of Acheworld civil war on the horizon...the Onstadite Inquisition against the Disatisfactist Rebellion.
chuvak
+0 -0
I want to be on the side of the just and righteous. Please tell me which one that is.
I want to be on the side of the just and righteous. Please tell me which one that is.
zem
+3 -0
everything is getting worse all the time forever
everything is getting worse all the time forever
baryonyx
+0 -0
DISATISFACTIST HERETIC! THE WISDOM OF ONSTAD IS ETERNAL.
DISATISFACTIST HERETIC! THE WISDOM OF ONSTAD IS ETERNAL.
harletron
+2 -0
Everybody dies, everything ends, everybody poops. the universe is balance, cold, horrifying, calculated balance.
Everybody dies, everything ends, everybody poops. the universe is balance, cold, horrifying, calculated balance.
anomalous3
+0 -0
chubby for the fecal reference
chubby for the fecal reference
boingjones
+0 -0
chubby for kids book reference
chubby for kids book reference
gumfish
+0 -0
I will never die.
I will never die.
ovenface
+0 -1
everybody dies frustrated and sad and that is beautiful.
everybody dies frustrated and sad and that is beautiful.
rowboat
+0 -0
Ouch! The TMBG reference makes it hard to lame you. But I must. Justice can be ugly.
Ouch! The TMBG reference makes it hard to lame you. But I must. Justice can be ugly.
ovenface
+0 -0
frankly, tmbg references are meant to be lamed (and secretly enjoyed at the same time.)
frankly, tmbg references are meant to be lamed (and secretly enjoyed at the same time.)
rowboat
+1 -0
Your logic is truth. It's like a whirlpool and it never ends.
Your logic is truth. It's like a whirlpool and it never ends.
grombly
+1 -0
i think to summarise my feelings on what you said, i'd like to point out the highest rated and most commented achewood strips are "Ray gets sort of stoned" and "Your porno name" respectively.
i think you're expecting a little too much from this comic, like you're entitled to 10 free IQ points onto your original score or something. on the contrary, if you notice, none of it is particularly high-brow if you know what he's referencing.
i think to summarise my feelings on what you said, i'd like to point out the highest rated and most commented achewood strips are "Ray gets sort of stoned" and "Your porno name" respectively.
i think you're expecting a little too much from this comic, like you're entitled to 10 free IQ points onto your original score or something. on the contrary, if you notice, none of it is particularly high-brow if you know what he's referencing.
poing
+1 -1
It's never been about the content, but rather the bizarre ways he's presented it. If there's been a decline in the past 6 months (and there has) it's because the comic has just become too fucking obvious.
It's never been about the content, but rather the bizarre ways he's presented it. If there's been a decline in the past 6 months (and there has) it's because the comic has just become too fucking obvious.
drskradley
+3 -0
psst...you left caps lock off....
psst...you left caps lock off....
grombly
+0 -0
OK SORRY IS THIS BETTER
OK SORRY IS THIS BETTER
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
IS THIS THING ON? MIC-CHECK ONE-TWO-ONE-TWO PLEASE TURN DOWN THE HIGHS A LITTLE, PLEASE AND THANK YOU
IS THIS THING ON? MIC-CHECK ONE-TWO-ONE-TWO PLEASE TURN DOWN THE HIGHS A LITTLE, PLEASE AND THANK YOU
kvanever
+21 -0
Do my tears surprise you sir?
Strong men also cry.
Do my tears surprise you sir?
Strong men also cry.
chuvak
+3 -0
...fuckin' a man.
...fuckin' a man.
lateadopter
+15 -0
Or: Fuckin' A, man.
They parse somewhat differently.
Or: Fuckin' A, man.
They parse somewhat differently.
miku224
+1 -2
I can't help but link to this Dinosaur Comic. It seems relevant.
I can't help but link to this Dinosaur Comic. It seems relevant.
peterjoel
+0 -0
Not really relevant. Unless you are angling for "The Big Friggin' Lebowski" ?
(or "The Friggin' Big Lebowski"....)
Not really relevant. Unless you are angling for "The Big Friggin' Lebowski" ?
(or "The Friggin' Big Lebowski"....)
peterjoel
+0 -0
Also... this is the first time I noticed the little person in the bottom left corner of dinosaur comics, about to get stepped on by Rex!
Also... this is the first time I noticed the little person in the bottom left corner of dinosaur comics, about to get stepped on by Rex!
spinynorman
+0 -0
I thought it was, "Dude, fuckin' A," as said through stoner's choke.
I thought it was, "Dude, fuckin' A," as said through stoner's choke.
peterjoel
+0 -0
oh.. I thought it was "Fuckin' hey"
oh.. I thought it was "Fuckin' hey"
glurgle
+0 -0
It's of Canadian origin: "fuckin' eh man!"
It's of Canadian origin: "fuckin' eh man!"
littleherrdoktor
+0 -0
mind if i do a j?
mind if i do a j?
chuvak
+0 -0
Her life is in your hands dude.
Don't say that, man.
Her life is in your hands.
Aw...
Her life is in your hands dude.
Don't say that, man.
Her life is in your hands.
Aw...
chuchurocket
+0 -0
as long as you don't make a :(
as long as you don't make a :(
comrade_tom
+6 -1
Cornelius has some fun little tits today!
Cornelius has some fun little tits today!
rowboat
+1 -0
Let's see what your tits look like in fifty years, kid.
Let's see what your tits look like in fifty years, kid.
spinynorman
+1 -0
Has anyone else noticed that Teodor and Cornelius both sleep on plain white mattresses on the floor in empty rooms? And Teodor sleeps buck naked... Their living conditions are similar to junkies squatting in some derelict apartment. Toss a few candles and an empty case of beer and you've got a stone's throw away from living on the street.
I worry about Onstad's living conditions, friends. I worry.
Has anyone else noticed that Teodor and Cornelius both sleep on plain white mattresses on the floor in empty rooms? And Teodor sleeps buck naked... Their living conditions are similar to junkies squatting in some derelict apartment. Toss a few candles and an empty case of beer and you've got a stone's throw away from living on the street.
I worry about Onstad's living conditions, friends. I worry.
drskradley
+0 -0
Then again, they are bears. Teddy bears, I've always assumed. Be thankful they aren't in bed with Chris himself.
Then again, they are bears. Teddy bears, I've always assumed. Be thankful they aren't in bed with Chris himself.
anitrophaeron
+0 -0
I'm not so sure about that. Depending on Cornelius' age he may pre-date the "Teddy" moniker which first came into use in 1902. I may easily be wrong, and I can't seem to find the comic in question, but I sort of remember an "Achewood circa 1901" single panel strip which showed Cornelius already in college sitting in a fraternity common room.
I'm not so sure about that. Depending on Cornelius' age he may pre-date the "Teddy" moniker which first came into use in 1902. I may easily be wrong, and I can't seem to find the comic in question, but I sort of remember an "Achewood circa 1901" single panel strip which showed Cornelius already in college sitting in a fraternity common room.
drskradley
+0 -0
But even if he were to pre-date the "Teddy" moniker, over the last 100-odd years he would surely not be one to kick up a fuss about being called one. He would accept the new terminology purely because it does not matter. This sorta shit don't worry him.
But even if he were to pre-date the "Teddy" moniker, over the last 100-odd years he would surely not be one to kick up a fuss about being called one. He would accept the new terminology purely because it does not matter. This sorta shit don't worry him.
johnmatrix
+0 -0
Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure Achewood isn't technically a graphic novel. Try again, Time.
Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure Achewood isn't technically a graphic novel. Try again, Time.
neonfreon
+0 -0
i told some friends that it won that award, and they called me a nerd.
i told some friends that it won that award, and they called me a nerd.
pkitty
+0 -0
Didn't you read the article? Time totally cops to it, all "Okay, Achewood is not actually a graphic novel. But we wanted to acknowledge how awesome it is, and on what other list could we possibly put it?" They break their own rules so they can bow to the power of Achewood. That's straight up respect , dude.
Didn't you read the article? Time totally cops to it, all "Okay, Achewood is not actually a graphic novel. But we wanted to acknowledge how awesome it is, and on what other list could we possibly put it?" They break their own rules so they can bow to the power of Achewood. That's straight up respect , dude.
arborwin
+0 -0
I think I will waive judgment on this matter until the full story unfolds.
I think I will waive judgment on this matter until the full story unfolds.
dreamydeary
+5 -0
why is the copyright 2006?
why is the copyright 2006?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
why, indeed!! quite curious...
why, indeed!! quite curious...
shoinan
+0 -0
Well spotted! Suggests the strip was written last year and that Chris has decided to use it now for whatever reason. The man has got reserves, people!
Well spotted! Suggests the strip was written last year and that Chris has decided to use it now for whatever reason. The man has got reserves, people!
cpnglxynchos
+1 -1
my thoughts exactly.
oh, and Freeman for the Win.
my thoughts exactly.
oh, and Freeman for the Win.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
ha. that would have gotten me lamed.
ha. that would have gotten me lamed.
shoinan
+0 -0
I chubbied you. Goddamn if anyone is FTW it's Freeman.
I chubbied you. Goddamn if anyone is FTW it's Freeman.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
hah. thanks!
i will say, however, that Solid Snake is definitely number one if the universe's hardest-working theoretical physicist isn't.
hah. thanks!
i will say, however, that Solid Snake is definitely number one if the universe's hardest-working theoretical physicist isn't.
andrew_
+2 -0
Now I'm curious to see if there are any other instances of this happening.
as if I needed a reason to re-read every achewood.
Now I'm curious to see if there are any other instances of this happening.
as if I needed a reason to re-read every achewood.
coolbreeze3
+0 -0
I'm pretty sure this is the saddest thing. Poor poor Cornelius. :(
I'm pretty sure this is the saddest thing. Poor poor Cornelius. :(
pyromancer
+5 -0
It could have been worse. How about a GIT'R'DONE tat in Star Wars logo shape?
It could have been worse. How about a GIT'R'DONE tat in Star Wars logo shape?
tekende
+2 -0
A long time ago, in a trailer park far away...
A long time ago, in a trailer park far away...
coolbreeze3
+0 -0
Oh dear, you're right. That would have been infinitely worse. If there is one thing that I hate it is that stupid redneck phrase.
Oh dear, you're right. That would have been infinitely worse. If there is one thing that I hate it is that stupid redneck phrase.
tommycrashwreck
+7 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
jamers
+0 -1
Now THAT is the worst tattoo I have ever seen. I would feel sorry for the guy, but he looks like he's proud of it...
Now THAT is the worst tattoo I have ever seen. I would feel sorry for the guy, but he looks like he's proud of it...
littleherrdoktor
+0 -0
um, mock-up?
um, mock-up?
spinynorman
+4 -0
I actually think it'd be funnier if it was the wrong font, like New Times Roman or Comic Sans... Just STAR WARS like you were processed through a giant laser printer. You're too shitty even to get the right font.
I actually think it'd be funnier if it was the wrong font, like New Times Roman or Comic Sans... Just STAR WARS like you were processed through a giant laser printer. You're too shitty even to get the right font.
phy
+1 -0
I know what's in MY nightmares tonight.
I know what's in MY nightmares tonight.
slickshoes3234
+0 -0
oh jesus christ if that tattoo was in comic sans... impossible
oh jesus christ if that tattoo was in comic sans... impossible
miked
+0 -0
with regard to earlier exchange (s) about the quality of recent strips: there have been ups and downs every year, which is just the way these things go. There's been some awesome stuff this year including the Roast Beef proposal, Todd as Belushi, Lyle the Registered Asshole, Fuck You Friday (Pat Edition)and "Comic Sans" which I just got framed for my girlfriend! I'd call it a pretty good year and I'm getting my chuckles from the current strips, good to see Corneilis getting to run his mouth a bit more..
with regard to earlier exchange (s) about the quality of recent strips: there have been ups and downs every year, which is just the way these things go. There's been some awesome stuff this year including the Roast Beef proposal, Todd as Belushi, Lyle the Registered Asshole, Fuck You Friday (Pat Edition)and "Comic Sans" which I just got framed for my girlfriend! I'd call it a pretty good year and I'm getting my chuckles from the current strips, good to see Corneilis getting to run his mouth a bit more..
jesler729
+0 -0
Actually most of my favorites from this year have been pretty recent.
Actually most of my favorites from this year have been pretty recent.
honesttom
+0 -0
I'd say there have been no great story arcs this year, but there have been many damn fine one-offs. Today's being one.
I'd say there have been no great story arcs this year, but there have been many damn fine one-offs. Today's being one.
dovey
+0 -0
Do you not consider Beef and Molly getting engaged a great arc? Pshaw
Do you not consider Beef and Molly getting engaged a great arc? Pshaw
miked
+0 -0
*Cornelius* dammit!
*Cornelius* dammit!
lost_buoy
+5 -1
Cornelius pulls off angst and anguish far better than Hayden Christensen.
Then again, so does a spring-loaded wooden dog eternally landing a nickel on its nose.
Cornelius pulls off angst and anguish far better than Hayden Christensen.
Then again, so does a spring-loaded wooden dog eternally landing a nickel on its nose.
poing
+3 -1
WAS THAT AN ALLUSION TO A COMIC
WAS THAT AN ALLUSION TO A COMIC
pants
+13 -0
MR POING / TOWEL I CHALLENGE YOU TO RANDOM. PICKLES AT DAWN. I WILL ACE A DING-DONG PING-PONG MOTHER FUCKER.
SHIT A BICYCLE.
MR POING / TOWEL I CHALLENGE YOU TO RANDOM. PICKLES AT DAWN. I WILL ACE A DING-DONG PING-PONG MOTHER FUCKER.
SHIT A BICYCLE.
spinynorman
+0 -0
I wish I could chubby that free-association magic. I wish I could.
I wish I could chubby that free-association magic. I wish I could.
nevlik
+0 -0
Done.
Also, bicycle well shat.
Done.
Also, bicycle well shat.
sortelli
+0 -1
Poing isn't random. He's precise. He gives the Achewood assetbar community absolutely nothing more than it is worth.
Poing isn't random. He's precise. He gives the Achewood assetbar community absolutely nothing more than it is worth.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
that was rad.
also ridiculous.
...'radiculous'?
that was rad.
also ridiculous.
...'radiculous'?
miked
+1 -0
https://achewood.com/index.php?date=08252003
a classic.
https://achewood.com/index.php?date=08252003
a classic.
lost_buoy
+0 -0
Thank you, Beastie Boy, for the exhaustive research. You are the Thomas Watson to my Alexander Bell. That is, unless you are in the camp of Antonio Meucci.
Thank you, Beastie Boy, for the exhaustive research. You are the Thomas Watson to my Alexander Bell. That is, unless you are in the camp of Antonio Meucci.
zedpower
+0 -0
If anything can make Cornelius give up alcohol for good, I bet this'll be it. I wonder if he'd have it in him to run the Dude & Catastrophe anymore.
Here's to hoping he won't try to go to bed in the crosswalk... What's better? The Star Wars logo, or tire treads?
If anything can make Cornelius give up alcohol for good, I bet this'll be it. I wonder if he'd have it in him to run the Dude & Catastrophe anymore.
Here's to hoping he won't try to go to bed in the crosswalk... What's better? The Star Wars logo, or tire treads?
neonfreon
+0 -0
he has lost his dignity. he is BROKEN.
he has lost his dignity. he is BROKEN.
nbgreene
+0 -0
i like that this comic is the receptical in which achewood fanboys can employ their huge reserves of star wars knowledge.
i like that this comic is the receptical in which achewood fanboys can employ their huge reserves of star wars knowledge.
anitrophaeron
+1 -0
Death threats regarding what is or is not CANON and accusations of just looking stuff up on Wikipedia are sure to follow...
Death threats regarding what is or is not CANON and accusations of just looking stuff up on Wikipedia are sure to follow...
rowboat
+2 -0
Who's scruffy looking?
Who's scruffy looking?
pygmalion00
+2 -0
I can understand Cornelius's grief. I always thought he was more of a Battlestar Galactica fan than anything.
I can understand Cornelius's grief. I always thought he was more of a Battlestar Galactica fan than anything.
echidnaboy
+1 -0
Mr. Bear probably considers even 2001 tiresomely populist. The only SF films he enjoys are Metropolis and Tarkovsky's Solaris. Maybe Barbarella.
Mr. Bear probably considers even 2001 tiresomely populist. The only SF films he enjoys are Metropolis and Tarkovsky's Solaris. Maybe Barbarella.
pygmalion00
+2 -0
That sounds more like Pat's taste. Cornelius would be more into The Prisoner and Dr. Who.
That sounds more like Pat's taste. Cornelius would be more into The Prisoner and Dr. Who.
honesttom
+0 -0
I'm thinking he might be even more old school than that. I'm thinking Quatermass and Day of the Triffids.
I'm thinking he might be even more old school than that. I'm thinking Quatermass and Day of the Triffids.
jackparsons
+0 -0
Metropolis, buddy. And he was in college when Méliès was doing his thing.
Metropolis, buddy. And he was in college when Méliès was doing his thing.
echidnaboy
+0 -0
The Prisoner, Quatermass and Melies all sound very much like Connie's style. Incidentally, my Firefox insists on displaying accented characters as question marks. Does anyone know of an addon/extension which will correct this, or is it just an Acheworld thing?
The Prisoner, Quatermass and Melies all sound very much like Connie's style. Incidentally, my Firefox insists on displaying accented characters as question marks. Does anyone know of an addon/extension which will correct this, or is it just an Acheworld thing?
jamers
+0 -0
To be fair to Cornelius, my reaction would be similar in his situation. Even the bad-assest guy can be brought low by an inadvertent Lucas related tattoo.
To be fair to Cornelius, my reaction would be similar in his situation. Even the bad-assest guy can be brought low by an inadvertent Lucas related tattoo.
poohnds
+1 -0
Damn you Onstad, Mr.Bear deserved better!
>: (
Damn you Onstad, Mr.Bear deserved better!
>: (
lobster_mobster
+0 -0
Oh lordy oh Christ, Cornelius.
Oh lordy oh Christ, Cornelius.
stevepants
+0 -0
CLASSIC
CLASSIC
madmaki
+0 -0
I'm saddened to see Cornelius, winner of the Badass Games in such a state. That being said, I trust Onstad to make such a disgraceful portrayal of a personal hero into a workable and ultimately entertaining comic.
Perhaps I take this shit way too seriously.
I'm saddened to see Cornelius, winner of the Badass Games in such a state. That being said, I trust Onstad to make such a disgraceful portrayal of a personal hero into a workable and ultimately entertaining comic.
Perhaps I take this shit way too seriously.
phy
+2 -0
Remember those shitty Hallowe'en costumes, where it would be like a plastic Spider-Man mask and a smock that said "Spider-Man" on the front? Connie has the face of a stuffed teddy bear. For the rest of his life, he is a shitty Hallowe'en Ewok. This is the source of his chagrin. This is why he cries.
Remember those shitty Hallowe'en costumes, where it would be like a plastic Spider-Man mask and a smock that said "Spider-Man" on the front? Connie has the face of a stuffed teddy bear. For the rest of his life, he is a shitty Hallowe'en Ewok. This is the source of his chagrin. This is why he cries.
phy
+1 -1
Also, looks like the alt text writer is due for another firing.
Also, looks like the alt text writer is due for another firing.
quantumcasaba
+0 -0
Oh my god, this is awesome. On top of the astute observation, you just reminded me that I was Egon Spengler when I was 4/5 with one of those shitty plastic smock costumes.
..I was a cross-dressing nerd girl before I could tie my shoes.
Oh my god, this is awesome. On top of the astute observation, you just reminded me that I was Egon Spengler when I was 4/5 with one of those shitty plastic smock costumes.
..I was a cross-dressing nerd girl before I could tie my shoes.
spicyponyhead
+0 -0
I've never seen anyone actually use "Hallowe'en" with the apostrophe before. Except perhaps some fucking pagan website. Are you a PAGAN WEBSITE?!
I've never seen anyone actually use "Hallowe'en" with the apostrophe before. Except perhaps some fucking pagan website. Are you a PAGAN WEBSITE?!
paco
+1 -0
There are two things which are truly horrible here, and neither is the tattoo itself.
1. The first is how Cornelius must be feeling. Waking up tired, with his body aching and his head pounding like a drum, feeling worn out and dirty, not really knowing where he is, getting a barley coherent phone call, and then seeing . . . that . . . in the mirror.
2. The other thing is that not only does he have a tat of Star Wars on his chest, everyone knows about it. Everyone knowns he has it. It is too late to contain the plague. It will not matter if he wears a shirt in public for the rest of his life. They know.
And #2 is what goes through his head, as he stares at himself in the mirror, with #1.
Some things are two much for a man.
There are two things which are truly horrible here, and neither is the tattoo itself.
1. The first is how Cornelius must be feeling. Waking up tired, with his body aching and his head pounding like a drum, feeling worn out and dirty, not really knowing where he is, getting a barley coherent phone call, and then seeing . . . that . . . in the mirror.
2. The other thing is that not only does he have a tat of Star Wars on his chest, everyone knows about it. Everyone knowns he has it. It is too late to contain the plague. It will not matter if he wears a shirt in public for the rest of his life. They know.
And #2 is what goes through his head, as he stares at himself in the mirror, with #1.
Some things are two much for a man.
tobycat
+4 -1
Holy crap I've been reading Achewood since November 2001... I just for the very first time clicked on the discuss button, and all you people are talking, LOTS of you... I remember Chris had the Dumbrella board discussion thing but he nixed it after too much moderation requirements... anyhow, holy crap I had no idea that each strip garnered this much comment, kinda weird cause I thought it was my own little peculiar obsession that I had to quickly minimize when a colleague walked by my desk... but there are all of YOU... it's like Rotten Tomatoes reviews...
wow...
Holy crap I've been reading Achewood since November 2001... I just for the very first time clicked on the discuss button, and all you people are talking, LOTS of you... I remember Chris had the Dumbrella board discussion thing but he nixed it after too much moderation requirements... anyhow, holy crap I had no idea that each strip garnered this much comment, kinda weird cause I thought it was my own little peculiar obsession that I had to quickly minimize when a colleague walked by my desk... but there are all of YOU... it's like Rotten Tomatoes reviews...
wow...
evolume
+0 -0
open the door HAL
open the door HAL
atrusrand
+2 -0
Most people don't realize that he actually dropped the phone inbetween panels five and six.
Really, I've never felt worse for Cornelius then at this time. Poor bloke, a broken shell of the badass he once was.
Most people don't realize that he actually dropped the phone inbetween panels five and six.
Really, I've never felt worse for Cornelius then at this time. Poor bloke, a broken shell of the badass he once was.
mikeleffel2
+0 -0
Poor Corny! <3 <3 <3 <3
Poor Corny! <3 <3 <3 <3
evolume
+0 -0
this is the best fucking achewood in recent memory. brilliant!
i'm getting this tattoo, that's all there is to it!
this is the best fucking achewood in recent memory. brilliant!
i'm getting this tattoo, that's all there is to it!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
..can his crying be heard through the phone?
uh oh.
..can his crying be heard through the phone?
uh oh.
versacesmux
+1 -0
I just did a :(
I just did a :(
baryonyx
+0 -0
Now I'm very curious if these Consequences will enter the strip continuity in any way. The suddenness would make it exquisite.
Now I'm very curious if these Consequences will enter the strip continuity in any way. The suddenness would make it exquisite.
mendenbar
+39 -0
Cornelius all taking a lady home.
The lady all: "why won't you take your shirt off, babe?"
Cornelius all "Disaster employs itself in many mediums, I desire that you allow me this one liberty."
Cornelius all taking a lady home.
The lady all: "why won't you take your shirt off, babe?"
Cornelius all "Disaster employs itself in many mediums, I desire that you allow me this one liberty."
drskradley
+1 -0
There is no possible way that could have been phrased better.
Were I not too friendly to have chubbies, at least one would be yours. I would also allow you one to pass on to your kin.
There is no possible way that could have been phrased better.
Were I not too friendly to have chubbies, at least one would be yours. I would also allow you one to pass on to your kin.
baryonyx
+1 -0
Seconded. Add another ghost-chubby to your count on this comment.
Seconded. Add another ghost-chubby to your count on this comment.
littleherrdoktor
+2 -0
i gave out too many chubbies already, but i would've given them all to you
i gave out too many chubbies already, but i would've given them all to you
peterjoel
+1 -0
Don't worry, I have plenty! (I even gave you one accidentally when I meant to click "reply"....
The best part is that I chubbied mendenbar at exactly the same time as someone else, so it looked like I gave him 2. Henceforth, I shall consider that I did.
Don't worry, I have plenty! (I even gave you one accidentally when I meant to click "reply"....
The best part is that I chubbied mendenbar at exactly the same time as someone else, so it looked like I gave him 2. Henceforth, I shall consider that I did.
doc_rostov
+1 -0
I definitely just spent my last chubby.
But it was oh so very deserved.
I definitely just spent my last chubby.
But it was oh so very deserved.
fuckalgebra
+0 -0
Shit, does Cornelius even LIKE Star Wars?
Shit, does Cornelius even LIKE Star Wars?
wargasmic
+0 -0
...This is a bad dream, right? Right?
...This is a bad dream, right? Right?
falseprophet
+0 -0
He is definitely not afraid of the fucking police right now.
He is definitely not afraid of the fucking police right now.
omnidope
+0 -0
It could be worse...
It could be worse...
omnidope
+6 -1
whoops, here it be
[IMGS OFF]
whoops, here it be
[IMGS OFF]
tekende
+8 -0
that is mega nasty
that is dog shit
that is mega nasty
that is dog shit
nutmeg
+1 -0
that is exactly what i immediately said within my head
that is exactly what i immediately said within my head
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
you and me both, brotha'.
you and me both, brotha'.
zapatos
+0 -0
I started singing the MC Chris song.
My back pack s'got jets...
I started singing the MC Chris song.
My back pack s'got jets...
pygmalion00
+1 -0
Is it possible to want to chubby and lame something at the same time?
Is it possible to want to chubby and lame something at the same time?
nbgreene
+0 -0
where's count dooko? wheres that fucking annoying robot bad guy who was really lame?
where's count dooko? wheres that fucking annoying robot bad guy who was really lame?
baryonyx
+2 -1
Please. His name is General Grievous, Supreme Commander of the Droid Armies in the Confederacy of Independant Systems.
Please. His name is General Grievous, Supreme Commander of the Droid Armies in the Confederacy of Independant Systems.
catgrl131
+2 -0
Is that the back of the rather callipygian man in your avatar?
Is that the back of the rather callipygian man in your avatar?
jaldor
+0 -0
You don't know what callipygian means.
You don't know what callipygian means.
evolume
+0 -0
haha. "chubby"
haha. "chubby"
atticusonline
+1 -0
That tattoo artist was terrible. That guy in the mask doesn't even LOOK like Yoda.
That tattoo artist was terrible. That guy in the mask doesn't even LOOK like Yoda.
spicyponyhead
+0 -0
Good thing he has all those extra fat rolls. He couldn't have fit everyone otherwise!!
Good thing he has all those extra fat rolls. He couldn't have fit everyone otherwise!!
cuneocapo
+0 -0
At least it wasn't a battlestar tattoo. I think Cornelius would have shot himself at that point.
At least it wasn't a battlestar tattoo. I think Cornelius would have shot himself at that point.
jbacardi
+0 -0
Oh, the humanity.
Oh, the humanity.
nonamejoe
+0 -2
Best... alt text... EVAR
Best... alt text... EVAR
gumption
+0 -0
So then what would the coverup tattoo for that be? What could he possibly get?
So then what would the coverup tattoo for that be? What could he possibly get?
lateadopter
+2 -0
Cornelius is a bear. He could get all-body panda markings and pretend he was always a panda.
Cornelius is a bear. He could get all-body panda markings and pretend he was always a panda.
phthoggos
+0 -0
Congratulations this comment by lateadopter
You are
comment of the week
Congratulations this comment by lateadopter
You are
comment of the week
quantumcasaba
+0 -0
The word "Fuck" above it?
I don't really know his feelings about the franchise, though.
The word "Fuck" above it?
I don't really know his feelings about the franchise, though.
bjorntd
+0 -0
I don't think I understand why Teodor is yelling. You do not yell at hungover old men.
It is just not Allowed.
I don't think I understand why Teodor is yelling. You do not yell at hungover old men.
It is just not Allowed.
ovenface
+1 -1
teodor is still drunk.
teodor is still drunk.
cormanosanchez
+0 -0
Oh that is dog shit
Mr Bear I'm sorry.
Oh that is dog shit
Mr Bear I'm sorry.
dino_grill
+0 -0
Honestly. I think it's kind of hot.
Honestly. I think it's kind of hot.
wilzon
+0 -0
I'm not really sure how to rate this one... First six panels - Hilarious. Last four - devestating.
I'm not really sure how to rate this one... First six panels - Hilarious. Last four - devestating.
iovine
+0 -0
mmmmmaybe it's a dream???
probably not. I'm imagining him getting it. the liquor does make him crazy. you know the tequila doesn't make him scared of the fucking police.
but, why would he get a star wars tatoo? this sucks. maybe he can get it changed into something awesome. but what?
mmmmmaybe it's a dream???
probably not. I'm imagining him getting it. the liquor does make him crazy. you know the tequila doesn't make him scared of the fucking police.
but, why would he get a star wars tatoo? this sucks. maybe he can get it changed into something awesome. but what?
envika
+0 -0
I so want to see where this ends up.
I so want to see where this ends up.
tenthman
+0 -0
Okay, this is kind of long, but stick with me. So my friend is on tour in Europe, and he and his band are staying with some German dude who none of them really know. One of the guitar players in the band has a Star Wars/Straight Edge tattoo (if I knew what it was I would elaborate) that is on his arm or somewhere else visible. Their German host takes notice and compliments the tattoo, he then comments that he also has a Star Wars tattoo and asks if they'd like to see it. They say sure and the German host stands up, turns around and lifts his shirt up, exposing on his lower back "star wars" written in some completely nondescript sans serif font maybe like six inches across, 'star' and 'wars' right next to each other, not even stacked one on top of the other. So, Cornelius shouldn't be so upset.
Okay, this is kind of long, but stick with me. So my friend is on tour in Europe, and he and his band are staying with some German dude who none of them really know. One of the guitar players in the band has a Star Wars/Straight Edge tattoo (if I knew what it was I would elaborate) that is on his arm or somewhere else visible. Their German host takes notice and compliments the tattoo, he then comments that he also has a Star Wars tattoo and asks if they'd like to see it. They say sure and the German host stands up, turns around and lifts his shirt up, exposing on his lower back "star wars" written in some completely nondescript sans serif font maybe like six inches across, 'star' and 'wars' right next to each other, not even stacked one on top of the other. So, Cornelius shouldn't be so upset.
solobuttons
+2 -0
A cousin's friend has "YOU'RE NAME" on his ass cheeks. The idea being that he'd go into a bar, and make a bet with people--"I bet I have your name written on my butt." Sure enough, he would, and he'd make money.
REALLY CLEVER & CLASSY I KNOW.
Too bad he got the apprentice tattoo artist to write it, and they fucked up by making it say "you're".
A cousin's friend has "YOU'RE NAME" on his ass cheeks. The idea being that he'd go into a bar, and make a bet with people--"I bet I have your name written on my butt." Sure enough, he would, and he'd make money.
REALLY CLEVER & CLASSY I KNOW.
Too bad he got the apprentice tattoo artist to write it, and they fucked up by making it say "you're".
silentman
+0 -0
"My is name? Guess I don't owe you anything, chief."
"My is name? Guess I don't owe you anything, chief."
untilyouaresonude
+0 -1
Cornelius Bear demonstrates how to weep the weepy weep way.
Cornelius Bear demonstrates how to weep the weepy weep way.
untilyouaresonude
+1 -0
ashoykh
+0 -0
i'm looking and looking and I can't find a single innacuracy in cornelius' reflection - the writing is right, he's holding the phone in the correct hand, his right arm has that little line in it, his glasses are crooked the right way...cornelius is loved.
i'm looking and looking and I can't find a single innacuracy in cornelius' reflection - the writing is right, he's holding the phone in the correct hand, his right arm has that little line in it, his glasses are crooked the right way...cornelius is loved.
paco
+0 -0
Don't worry Cornelius! It's actually just a temporary tattoo that they put on you as a prank when you passed out!
Don't worry Cornelius! It's actually just a temporary tattoo that they put on you as a prank when you passed out!
tombsgrave
+0 -0
If it's any consolation, Cornelius, at least it isn't a tattoo of Trek Wars: The Furry Conflict.
Google its works, ye mighty, and despair.
If it's any consolation, Cornelius, at least it isn't a tattoo of Trek Wars: The Furry Conflict.
Google its works, ye mighty, and despair.
zoom
+1 -0
A man with a drunken Star Wars tat is a man with many a story to tell. When the shame subsides, Mr. Bear will have quite the yarn to spin.
A man with a drunken Star Wars tat is a man with many a story to tell. When the shame subsides, Mr. Bear will have quite the yarn to spin.
clever-nickname
+0 -1
"Well you see, one night in mid December, a few of my good friends asked me to partake in some comradery, in the form of drinking. Not wanting to offend, I aquiesced. Soon I was positively drunk off the stuff (Southern Comfort paired with lemonade, to be exact). Apparently, when I was drunk, I became enamored with the idea of a tattoo upon my chest, the logo of the movie franchise Star Wars."
Yeah, great story.
"Well you see, one night in mid December, a few of my good friends asked me to partake in some comradery, in the form of drinking. Not wanting to offend, I aquiesced. Soon I was positively drunk off the stuff (Southern Comfort paired with lemonade, to be exact). Apparently, when I was drunk, I became enamored with the idea of a tattoo upon my chest, the logo of the movie franchise Star Wars."
Yeah, great story.
clever-nickname
+0 -0
acquiesce,* fuck that first C.
acquiesce,* fuck that first C.
heyman
+0 -0
I guess the guys party a bit much when Lyle's not crappin in the house.
I guess the guys party a bit much when Lyle's not crappin in the house.
professor_bear
+0 -0
if you think that's bad you should see the matching weekend at bernies tattoos Lyle and Todd got after that week where they replaced all lquids with gordon's vodka
if you think that's bad you should see the matching weekend at bernies tattoos Lyle and Todd got after that week where they replaced all lquids with gordon's vodka
abbazaba
+0 -0
Lie Bot cannot tell Philippe this is the saddest thing because it is. and That is the saddest thing.
Lie Bot cannot tell Philippe this is the saddest thing because it is. and That is the saddest thing.
cousinted
+1 -0
What makes a man a man?
Is it brains?
Or Brawn?
Or the month you were born?
I just can't understand.
What makes a man a man?
Is it brains?
Or Brawn?
Or the month you were born?
I just can't understand.
cuneocapo
+0 -0
For the excellent Who reference!
For the excellent Who reference!
flash1087
+0 -0
I really hope the next few strips flipflop between Cornelius coping with his awful tattoo and Lyle learning about what his craps do to other people. We may be in for the best few weeks of Achewood since Stoned Lightning.
I really hope the next few strips flipflop between Cornelius coping with his awful tattoo and Lyle learning about what his craps do to other people. We may be in for the best few weeks of Achewood since Stoned Lightning.
tenthman
+1 -0
haven't you been reading what strangers on the internet have written?! it's getting worse not better, worse!
haven't you been reading what strangers on the internet have written?! it's getting worse not better, worse!
audhumla
+8 -0
How this discussion can continue without Mr. Cool Ice is beyond me.
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
How this discussion can continue without Mr. Cool Ice is beyond me.
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
chuvak
+0 -0
That has to be a russian guy. HAS TO BE.
That has to be a russian guy. HAS TO BE.
pityparty
+0 -0
This honestly disturbs me more than goatse or tubgirl.
This honestly disturbs me more than goatse or tubgirl.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Oh my god, sunglasses tattooed on the back of his head. I love the look of bewilderment on the face of the guy in the bottom right hand corner of the second one.
Oh my god, sunglasses tattooed on the back of his head. I love the look of bewilderment on the face of the guy in the bottom right hand corner of the second one.
spicyponyhead
+0 -0
I only hope that dude owns a refrigerated truck and makes ice deliveries to the MILFs of his town...
I only hope that dude owns a refrigerated truck and makes ice deliveries to the MILFs of his town...
aoyola
+1 -0
I have a feeling that this is how people felt the day after they got their free achewood tattoos
I have a feeling that this is how people felt the day after they got their free achewood tattoos
zoom
+0 -0
WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?
WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?
phthoggos
+0 -0
dude I came so close
so close but I couldn't do it
dude I came so close
so close but I couldn't do it
zapatos
+0 -0
I think it would be rad to get Todd passed out, face down, in a pool of his own vomit.
I think it would be rad to get Todd passed out, face down, in a pool of his own vomit.
wezelboy
+0 -0
Best schadenfreude strip ever.
Best schadenfreude strip ever.
sparhawk
+0 -0
The dude (Onstad), it shall be so noted, has no mercy...
The dude (Onstad), it shall be so noted, has no mercy...
meowmix
+1 -0
I read this one after I read the one after it. Somehow, this made me bust out laughing at work.
I read this one after I read the one after it. Somehow, this made me bust out laughing at work.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Meowmix works in a sadness factory, surely this a good strip.
Meowmix works in a sadness factory, surely this a good strip.
songbirdspectre
+0 -0
the bear is in despair.
the bear is in despair.
gussiejives
+0 -0
It's okay Mr. Bear, we all feel the same way about Episode 1.
It's okay Mr. Bear, we all feel the same way about Episode 1.
l_c_b
+0 -1
The thing is, it's just the STAR WARS logo. That is not the tattoo of a genteel yet quietly bad-assed sort of fellow like Cornelius. It's the tattoo someone with a gossamer bloatee gets when they tie on a few hard lemonades at a bar next door to the sci-fi con and are feeling "frisky".
The thing is, it's just the STAR WARS logo. That is not the tattoo of a genteel yet quietly bad-assed sort of fellow like Cornelius. It's the tattoo someone with a gossamer bloatee gets when they tie on a few hard lemonades at a bar next door to the sci-fi con and are feeling "frisky".
broahsaurus
+0 -0
I will probably forever see STAR WARS as RATZ ZWAR now.
The second Z is silent.
I will probably forever see STAR WARS as RATZ ZWAR now.
The second Z is silent.
fatcat
+0 -0
Mostly I amazed that Mr. Bear can rub his eyes with his pince-nez still on. How does that work?
Mostly I amazed that Mr. Bear can rub his eyes with his pince-nez still on. How does that work?
masterbbb26
+0 -0
This is the saddest thing philippe....this is the saddest thing.
This is the saddest thing philippe....this is the saddest thing.
A comment left by miku224 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by pendayho, RaysDangNachos, Thorfinn, NeoNaoNeo, NYU, ColonelColostomy, kazad, nagsworth, lk, RicNine, ravindra108, Hyetal, Doc_Rostov)
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First I say Onstad should take a break, and then he goes and takes a 20 carat dump on my chest.
I stand corrected Mr. Onstad, you rule.
shit, 20 carats is good, right?
That would be about the mass of two rabbit droppings.
So good for jewelery, so-so for droppings.
A comment left by da_newb was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Norsef, Thorfinn, Methadone)
...there are updates constantly. have you met my friend the constant bookmark click?
https://www.achewood.com/rss.php
BAM.
I was wondering about this too, thanks
Thank you.
Look on the brightside, though, that obviously isn't a lot of crap. You could be drenched in it.
Actually he sort of took a metaphorical dump on Cornelius' chest. Why must he suffer for your actions??
I think he was going more for what would move the calm, british, stiff upper lip Cornelius to tears. Not much has, as he has likely not weeped so since 1967.
It just tears me up that the most badass dude on Achewood is crying.
A comment left by miku224 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by NeoNaoNeo, billypooter, msucaba)
It is indeed a YES moment.
You had the right of it.
Cornelius just got taken to school in the car of pain... again.
miku, Your avatar goes great with Big Cheese by Nirvana. and a great many other songs i suspect.