featurelessvoid
+1 -0
Imagine the spectacle, though, when Ramses finds out that his son is not a proponent of being a cock to a stranger.
Imagine the spectacle, though, when Ramses finds out that his son is not a proponent of being a cock to a stranger.
lastlarf
+1 -0
I get the feeling the stranger was being a Cock to Ramses first.
I get the feeling the stranger was being a Cock to Ramses first.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
When you lay on the horn you have broken the social contract. Consequences will naturally follow.
When you lay on the horn you have broken the social contract. Consequences will naturally follow.
wingspan
+0 -0
Although in some countries drivers seem unaware that cars will run even when they are not laying on the horn.
Although in some countries drivers seem unaware that cars will run even when they are not laying on the horn.
nickb285
+9 -0
Ramses is not a cock to strangers. Ramses is a badass to strangers, and a terror to men who are cocks to strangers. Such as a man who honks at his Falcon.
Ramses is not a cock to strangers. Ramses is a badass to strangers, and a terror to men who are cocks to strangers. Such as a man who honks at his Falcon.
lastlarf
+0 -0
You said it better than I.
You said it better than I.
cracklewater
+0 -0
I've decided that it is very likely that Ramses drives an all-black 1973 Falcon XB GT hardtop.
V8, obviously.
No-one else needs to believe this, but they are welcome to, if they'd like.
I've decided that it is very likely that Ramses drives an all-black 1973 Falcon XB GT hardtop.
V8, obviously.
No-one else needs to believe this, but they are welcome to, if they'd like.
smilebuddha
+6 -0
I'm thinking a 1963 Ford Falcon Futura. Black with red vinyl interior. Inline 6. AM Radio. No seatbelts. If it was a "hotter" model of Falcon, I don't think that good ol' boy would have ever honked at Ramses in the first place.
[IMGS OFF]
To me, the Falcon Futura says class. It says "Damn if I don't want a classic piece of Detroit steel but one that won't eat a weekend putting back in shape." Slightly understated, but with a fury under the hood.
The Falcon Futura. Ford. Feel the difference .
I'm thinking a 1963 Ford Falcon Futura. Black with red vinyl interior. Inline 6. AM Radio. No seatbelts. If it was a "hotter" model of Falcon, I don't think that good ol' boy would have ever honked at Ramses in the first place.
[IMGS OFF]
To me, the Falcon Futura says class. It says "Damn if I don't want a classic piece of Detroit steel but one that won't eat a weekend putting back in shape." Slightly understated, but with a fury under the hood.
The Falcon Futura. Ford. Feel the difference .
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Considering his soliloquy, I don't think Ramses would have a "Christ is the Answer" plate on the front of his Falcon.
Considering his soliloquy, I don't think Ramses would have a "Christ is the Answer" plate on the front of his Falcon.
jeffspaulding
+10 -0
Unless the question is: "what is the first thing you say when the driver of this car gets out"
Unless the question is: "what is the first thing you say when the driver of this car gets out"
rowboat
+0 -0
What ever happened to a good old "I'm sorry?"
What ever happened to a good old "I'm sorry?"
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Ramses would liken that to someone taking a wizz on his shoes.
and he ain't even wearin' shoes!!
Ramses would liken that to someone taking a wizz on his shoes.
and he ain't even wearin' shoes!!
cracklewater
+0 -0
You're right that this one is more in the style of The man. the '73 is special for its own reasons.
You're right that this one is more in the style of The man. the '73 is special for its own reasons.
farqussus
+0 -0
"hotter" model like this? [IMGS OFF]
"hotter" model like this? [IMGS OFF]
cpnglxynchos
+18 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
stereo
+0 -0
His car was already pictured as a 73 XB Falcon at one point, so I think that's safe to assume.
His car was already pictured as a 73 XB Falcon at one point, so I think that's safe to assume.
cracklewater
+0 -0
Really? I honestly hadn't spotted that. Thanks for pointing it out.
It's just that the first Falcon that always springs to mind is the last of the V8 Interceptors.
(A piece of history!)
Really? I honestly hadn't spotted that. Thanks for pointing it out.
It's just that the first Falcon that always springs to mind is the last of the V8 Interceptors.
(A piece of history!)
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Mad Max drove a Falcon?
Mad Max drove a Falcon?
cracklewater
+0 -0
With a modified nose cone and a couple of extra fins, but yes indeed .
the yellow pursuit cars were XA and XB Falcons as well.
The Nightrider was driving a stolen a MFP black interceptor, but it was a Holden Monaro.
With a modified nose cone and a couple of extra fins, but yes indeed .
the yellow pursuit cars were XA and XB Falcons as well.
The Nightrider was driving a stolen a MFP black interceptor, but it was a Holden Monaro.
smilebuddha
+5 -0
Oh damn, that's right. He's leaning on it in a strip after Beef's wedding.
The thing is, my brother owned a Futura for a few years. The thing sounded like a bucket of doorknobs being dropped on a concrete floor when it started up, gobbled oil like a armored division racing through bocage , and had...um...no seatbelts. But it's a wonderful feeling riding shotgun in a car that gets happy looks, thumbs up, and frantic "roll down the window" gestures just so 70 year old men can go "Is that a Falcon? Damn!" wherever you go.
You feel like you're contributing to society just by keeping such a car on the road, with young kids looking at such a strange steel rattle-trap with glazed-eye wonder, and their elders getting a faint cough stuck in their throat, thinking back to those days where they had their youth, a full tank of gas, their best girl by their side, and a crisp, clear sky stretched out before them, racing down the highway towards an azure horizon.
************
God, stereo, you're such a killjoy.
Oh damn, that's right. He's leaning on it in a strip after Beef's wedding.
The thing is, my brother owned a Futura for a few years. The thing sounded like a bucket of doorknobs being dropped on a concrete floor when it started up, gobbled oil like a armored division racing through bocage , and had...um...no seatbelts. But it's a wonderful feeling riding shotgun in a car that gets happy looks, thumbs up, and frantic "roll down the window" gestures just so 70 year old men can go "Is that a Falcon? Damn!" wherever you go.
You feel like you're contributing to society just by keeping such a car on the road, with young kids looking at such a strange steel rattle-trap with glazed-eye wonder, and their elders getting a faint cough stuck in their throat, thinking back to those days where they had their youth, a full tank of gas, their best girl by their side, and a crisp, clear sky stretched out before them, racing down the highway towards an azure horizon.
************
God, stereo, you're such a killjoy.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -1
Ralph Nader made his bones with the bestseller expose starring the Chevy Corvair: "Unsafe at Any Speed" , iirc. But if I also remember, correctly, the Falcon was right up in the top 3 or so too.
I have never forgiven Ralph for running in 2000. If there's any justice, he'll be run down by a hit-and-run driver in a Corvair or Falcon with a Gore 2000 bumper sticker.
Ralph Nader made his bones with the bestseller expose starring the Chevy Corvair: "Unsafe at Any Speed" , iirc. But if I also remember, correctly, the Falcon was right up in the top 3 or so too.
I have never forgiven Ralph for running in 2000. If there's any justice, he'll be run down by a hit-and-run driver in a Corvair or Falcon with a Gore 2000 bumper sticker.
notcool
+0 -0
This is the way.
This is exactly the way I feel.
When I drive in my '68 Nova.
That my Girl bought for me as a freakin' birthday gift.
This is the way.
This is exactly the way I feel.
When I drive in my '68 Nova.
That my Girl bought for me as a freakin' birthday gift.
zootsutra
+0 -0
And that is the difference between a badass and a jerkass.
And that is the difference between a badass and a jerkass.
vadun
+15 -0
Ramses planned the pocket dial. He wants to show his son how a man should live, day in/day out
Ramses planned the pocket dial. He wants to show his son how a man should live, day in/day out
gormster
+0 -0
mind = blown.
mind = blown.
unclemikey
+0 -0
This is so true that I suspect later strips will validate it
This is so true that I suspect later strips will validate it
deafwhisperer
+2 -0
This is so true that later strips won't need to.
This is so true that later strips won't need to.
hedonismbot
+22 -0
I need to face life like Ray does in the second panel. "Damn, fat chick hitting on me. Hell, this could be the day my mind gets changed and fat chicks become my thing. I'm going in."
I need to face life like Ray does in the second panel. "Damn, fat chick hitting on me. Hell, this could be the day my mind gets changed and fat chicks become my thing. I'm going in."
connormc
+1 -0
nice, but don't go in until your mind's been changed, you know?
nice, but don't go in until your mind's been changed, you know?
zombiezero
+0 -0
I think you're developing a thing for corpulent women.
I think you're developing a thing for corpulent women.
jeffspaulding
+0 -1
Clandestinely, corpulent women are cromulent.
(Like riding a scooter -- lots of fun 'til your friends see you.)
Clandestinely, corpulent women are cromulent.
(Like riding a scooter -- lots of fun 'til your friends see you.)
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Hey, 'kendieatsbabies,' why did you lame me?
Have you eaten a few extra babies and now feel ashamed?
Hey, 'kendieatsbabies,' why did you lame me?
Have you eaten a few extra babies and now feel ashamed?
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Typical internet compensation issues: laming you embiggened his ego.
Typical internet compensation issues: laming you embiggened his ego.
tekende
+0 -0
Her.
Her.
aelindil
+0 -0
But laming is a perfectly cromulent compensation.
But laming is a perfectly cromulent compensation.
fattybeaver
+0 -0
Hell maybe today my STD will just go away.
Hell maybe today my STD will just go away.
7a65726f
+0 -0
A comment left by 7a65726f was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by kendieatsbabies, tripleG, theguitarhero, mystkmanat)
A comment left by 7a65726f was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by kendieatsbabies, tripleG, theguitarhero, mystkmanat)
theguitarhero
+0 -0
My girlfriend is chubby and hell of good in bed.
Not cool.
Not funny.
Go burn in hell.
My girlfriend is chubby and hell of good in bed.
Not cool.
Not funny.
Go burn in hell.
plummet
+8 -2
fat girls give good head BECAUSE THEY'RE HUNGRY
fat girls give good head BECAUSE THEY'RE HUNGRY
plummet
+0 -0
all lamed outta nowhere g'damn
all lamed outta nowhere g'damn
invidious
+2 -0
Fat girls give good head because they just want to feel appreciated like anyone else, and when they finally meet a guy who doesn't criticize the way they look and just accepts them for who they are, not a pity-fuck but just a dude who appreciates a big girl with tits and ass, they will fuck the ever-lovin' shit out of him .
Fat girls give good head because they just want to feel appreciated like anyone else, and when they finally meet a guy who doesn't criticize the way they look and just accepts them for who they are, not a pity-fuck but just a dude who appreciates a big girl with tits and ass, they will fuck the ever-lovin' shit out of him .
theguitarhero
+0 -0
This is true.
I know this because I live this.
My name is Daniel, and I have a thing for corpulent women.
This is true.
I know this because I live this.
My name is Daniel, and I have a thing for corpulent women.
pokefritter
+0 -0
I second this! Big girls are so much better in the sack than a skinny chick every damn time, especially when treated with love, respect and the appreciation everyone fucking deserves when they have the courage to get naked in front of another person.
I second this! Big girls are so much better in the sack than a skinny chick every damn time, especially when treated with love, respect and the appreciation everyone fucking deserves when they have the courage to get naked in front of another person.
belgand
+0 -0
I won't say I unconditionally agree with you because I am not interested in chubby girls, but a friend of mine is a kinda chubby girl who does not get nearly enough sex and she is a horny sort who would totally make a man's entire weekend. I cannot count the number of men she has had crazy fantasies about such that just plain walking around can be a problem.
I won't say I unconditionally agree with you because I am not interested in chubby girls, but a friend of mine is a kinda chubby girl who does not get nearly enough sex and she is a horny sort who would totally make a man's entire weekend. I cannot count the number of men she has had crazy fantasies about such that just plain walking around can be a problem.
stereo
+1 -0
My problem is power to weight ratios, I mean enthusiasm is good but actual strength is more important. If they can pick me up and carry me it'd be nice.
My problem is power to weight ratios, I mean enthusiasm is good but actual strength is more important. If they can pick me up and carry me it'd be nice.
kickstart
+0 -0
The real question is, does Ray save the number? (Save->New Entry->Dad->Mobile)
The real question is, does Ray save the number? (Save->New Entry->Dad->Mobile)
falseprophet
+34 -1
It is a hard question to answer. Does it even matter? Ramses is a ramblin man. Seems like the type to just take a phone whenever he needs it from whatever sumbitch gets in his way like a CIA agent or a drug kingpin who must not be traced. Is he the kind who only hangs onto a phone for a few months at a time, only programming whatever numbers he really needs into it?
But this is overthinking it. Occam's razor suggests it's Ramses' own personal phone. The question now is what does Ray have the balls to do with his father's phone number saved?
Scenario One
Ray: Hey Dad.
Ramses: What you want?
Ray: Just callin to say Hi.
Ray: All right, well you said it. Goodbye.[hangs up]
Scenario Two
Ray: Dad I am in a sitch I am in need of help real bad.
Ramses: You kick his ass yet?
Ray: It's not that kind of problem, Dad--
Ramses: Fuck it ain't that kind of problem. You won the Fight, you win every goddamn fight. You call me after you done kicked his ass.[hangs up]
Scenario Three
Ray: Hey Dad I was thinkin by the time you arrive back in town "The Wrestler" will probably be out on Blu Ray and we could watch it and discuss its themes and ideas.
Ramses: Fuck I want to see a movie bout a old fake fighter who needs drugs to win fake fights. Then he gets all boo hoo bout how he fucked up his own body and kills hisself in the damn ring.
Ray: So you saw it? What other thoughts did you have on the movie?
Ramses: It sucked. That Bruce Springsteen song at the end sucked worse. The man's got a billion damn dollars and he's still writing songs about some imaginary romanticized low-class man that he thinks lived round the corner from in his youth him but he never bothered to shake his hand. Don't get me started on that bullshit.
Ray: Did you see any of the other movies that were discussed during Oscar season?
Ramses: I ain't seen a damn movie since [i]Brokeback Mountain . Ask me that's the movie shoulda won the Oscars. Not that damn Crash . I'm sick of movies made by foppy-haired white boys who think they know black people. I've cried and cursed while killin black men that was too busy livin lovin and dyin to complain about what the white man did to em. Fuck happened to personal responsibility in this country?
Ray: Wow Dad I did not know you had such down home politics.
Ramses: Ron Paul Oh Twelve. [hangs up][/i]
It is a hard question to answer. Does it even matter? Ramses is a ramblin man. Seems like the type to just take a phone whenever he needs it from whatever sumbitch gets in his way like a CIA agent or a drug kingpin who must not be traced. Is he the kind who only hangs onto a phone for a few months at a time, only programming whatever numbers he really needs into it?
But this is overthinking it. Occam's razor suggests it's Ramses' own personal phone. The question now is what does Ray have the balls to do with his father's phone number saved?
Scenario One
Ray: Hey Dad.
Ramses: What you want?
Ray: Just callin to say Hi.
Ray: All right, well you said it. Goodbye.[hangs up]
Scenario Two
Ray: Dad I am in a sitch I am in need of help real bad.
Ramses: You kick his ass yet?
Ray: It's not that kind of problem, Dad--
Ramses: Fuck it ain't that kind of problem. You won the Fight, you win every goddamn fight. You call me after you done kicked his ass.[hangs up]
Scenario Three
Ray: Hey Dad I was thinkin by the time you arrive back in town "The Wrestler" will probably be out on Blu Ray and we could watch it and discuss its themes and ideas.
Ramses: Fuck I want to see a movie bout a old fake fighter who needs drugs to win fake fights. Then he gets all boo hoo bout how he fucked up his own body and kills hisself in the damn ring.
Ray: So you saw it? What other thoughts did you have on the movie?
Ramses: It sucked. That Bruce Springsteen song at the end sucked worse. The man's got a billion damn dollars and he's still writing songs about some imaginary romanticized low-class man that he thinks lived round the corner from in his youth him but he never bothered to shake his hand. Don't get me started on that bullshit.
Ray: Did you see any of the other movies that were discussed during Oscar season?
Ramses: I ain't seen a damn movie since [i]Brokeback Mountain . Ask me that's the movie shoulda won the Oscars. Not that damn Crash . I'm sick of movies made by foppy-haired white boys who think they know black people. I've cried and cursed while killin black men that was too busy livin lovin and dyin to complain about what the white man did to em. Fuck happened to personal responsibility in this country?
Ray: Wow Dad I did not know you had such down home politics.
Ramses: Ron Paul Oh Twelve. [hangs up][/i]
falseprophet
+0 -0
I got lost in BBCode Land.
I got lost in BBCode Land.
stereo
+2 -0
[/hangs up]
[/hangs up]
plummet
+0 -1
this was truly a cool story, for bros of all ages
...........
...................__
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
this was truly a cool story, for bros of all ages
...........
...................__
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
plummet
+0 -0
I fucked up my brofist.
I fucked up my brofist.
scorpio_nadir
+2 -0
Ask Mommy to help you clean it up, I'm late for work.
And, hey! You still gotta drink your orange juice or you won't grow up big and strong, kay?
Ask Mommy to help you clean it up, I'm late for work.
And, hey! You still gotta drink your orange juice or you won't grow up big and strong, kay?
plummet
+0 -0
YES SIR
*ARGH GABBLE GOBBLE GREEBLE*
*GLUG GLUG GLUG*
YES SIR
*ARGH GABBLE GOBBLE GREEBLE*
*GLUG GLUG GLUG*
rowboat
+0 -0
You spoiled The Wrestler and you dissed The Boss. Still, somehow, this is the best post on the board.
You spoiled The Wrestler and you dissed The Boss. Still, somehow, this is the best post on the board.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Well, he's right about Springsteen. I dunno about Ramses going to see Brokeback Mountain. Nope. Not ever.
Gran Torino's much more his style.
Well, he's right about Springsteen. I dunno about Ramses going to see Brokeback Mountain. Nope. Not ever.
Gran Torino's much more his style.
bixschmix
+2 -0
A real badass is secure enough in his masculinity to see Brokeback Mountain.
A real badass is secure enough in his masculinity to see Brokeback Mountain.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
You run with some of these tough cookies then, bixschmix? Are they big nannerpus* fans too?
* I have no clue what nannerpus is other than what this crowd have said.
You run with some of these tough cookies then, bixschmix? Are they big nannerpus* fans too?
* I have no clue what nannerpus is other than what this crowd have said.
kickstart
+2 -0
the main thing about him is that he loves pancakes
the main thing about him is that he loves pancakes
mattylite
+0 -0
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
tekende
+0 -0
I went and got my free Grand Slam that day. It was a great way to start my day.
I went and got my free Grand Slam that day. It was a great way to start my day.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I got a Nannerpuss :(
I got a Nannerpuss :(
bixschmix
+0 -0
Nice-on-water sees a banana octopus atop some pancakes, and does a :(
Nice-on-water sees a banana octopus atop some pancakes, and does a :(
rowboat
+0 -0
I'd like to thank you for indirectly bringing Nannerpuss into my life, bix. One day, I'd never heard of him. The next, his likeness is my desktop and my girlfriend and I now sing the theme where we used to say "Hello, how are you."
It's very annoying. Be glad you aren't here.
I'd like to thank you for indirectly bringing Nannerpuss into my life, bix. One day, I'd never heard of him. The next, his likeness is my desktop and my girlfriend and I now sing the theme where we used to say "Hello, how are you."
It's very annoying. Be glad you aren't here.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Ditto.
Ditto.
falseprophet
+1 -0
Problem is ain't enough ladies secure enough in my masculinity for me to talk about Brokeback Mountain .
Problem is ain't enough ladies secure enough in my masculinity for me to talk about Brokeback Mountain .
belgand
+0 -0
Nobody can be secure enough in their masculinity to see a movie about rodeo cowboys. That is basically not at all a badass thing to do. Gay, straight, I don't even remotely care, but I'm not putting up with these whiny poseurs.
Nobody can be secure enough in their masculinity to see a movie about rodeo cowboys. That is basically not at all a badass thing to do. Gay, straight, I don't even remotely care, but I'm not putting up with these whiny poseurs.
notcool
+0 -0
I heard about the movie. Then I turned to my dad (who was drinking at the time) that if it involved eating pudding in any way, somebody was going to die.
He did not get what I meant.
I heard about the movie. Then I turned to my dad (who was drinking at the time) that if it involved eating pudding in any way, somebody was going to die.
He did not get what I meant.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I saw it, with my girlfriend in fact because she needed to see it for class last semester, and yeah, it wasn't that it was gay, it was just a boring movie.
We had sex afterwards.
I saw it, with my girlfriend in fact because she needed to see it for class last semester, and yeah, it wasn't that it was gay, it was just a boring movie.
We had sex afterwards.
bixschmix
+1 -0
That is probably because Heath Ledger was very attractive.
That is probably because Heath Ledger was very attractive.
smallblackdog
+0 -0
You should of course have had sex while it was showing.
You should of course have had sex while it was showing.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Well that was when we were feeling each other up, of course.
Well that was when we were feeling each other up, of course.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
::fumbling with bra half-heartedly, staring at screen::
I wish I knew how to quit yew
::fumbling with bra half-heartedly, staring at screen::
I wish I knew how to quit yew
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Like when Ray said if anyone called him gay, he'd just sit there, not being gay. Is basic premise.
Like when Ray said if anyone called him gay, he'd just sit there, not being gay. Is basic premise.
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
That reminds me: I've seen various people suggested for playing various Achewood roles, but I haven't seen Eastwood for Ramses. Maybe I skipped over it somewhere.
That reminds me: I've seen various people suggested for playing various Achewood roles, but I haven't seen Eastwood for Ramses. Maybe I skipped over it somewhere.
belgand
+0 -0
Classic badass Eastwood or modern-day over-praised has-been who keeps making mediocre films that get fawning accolades?
Face it, Million Dollar Baby was trite and dull filled with basically every possible cliche for a boxing film (and a cliche Morgan Freeman narration to boot!) and it veers off into a dull, topical piece of agit-prop that feels maudlin and preachy no matter what your position on the issue is.
Dyin' ain't much of a livin'.
Classic badass Eastwood or modern-day over-praised has-been who keeps making mediocre films that get fawning accolades?
Face it, Million Dollar Baby was trite and dull filled with basically every possible cliche for a boxing film (and a cliche Morgan Freeman narration to boot!) and it veers off into a dull, topical piece of agit-prop that feels maudlin and preachy no matter what your position on the issue is.
Dyin' ain't much of a livin'.
invidious
+0 -0
The only thing that really bothered me about Million Dollar Baby was the cheap and horribly contrived way Hillary Swank's character got injured.
And I agree with Ramses: Crash was a movie about racism made for white folk that haven't ever seen a black person. I can't imagine that anyone who's ever lived in a multi-cultural neighborhood/city wasn't just disgusted by the trite and ham-fisted way the RACISM IS BAD message was force-fed down the audience's throat.
The only thing that really bothered me about Million Dollar Baby was the cheap and horribly contrived way Hillary Swank's character got injured.
And I agree with Ramses: Crash was a movie about racism made for white folk that haven't ever seen a black person. I can't imagine that anyone who's ever lived in a multi-cultural neighborhood/city wasn't just disgusted by the trite and ham-fisted way the RACISM IS BAD message was force-fed down the audience's throat.
invidious
+0 -0
Addendum: there is "another" Crash , a movie with James Spader, that is worth the price of admission.
Addendum: there is "another" Crash , a movie with James Spader, that is worth the price of admission.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
One of these Crash es became a tv show. Guess which one?
One of these Crash es became a tv show. Guess which one?
whiteturtle
+1 -0
World's Deadliest Crashes
World's Deadliest Crashes
xiaomimi
+0 -0
World's Sexiest Crashes
World's Sexiest Crashes
theguitarhero
+0 -0
World's Racistiest Crashes
World's Racistiest Crashes
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
World's Slowest Crashes
World's Slowest Crashes
theguitarhero
+0 -0
World's Crashiest Crashes
World's Crashiest Crashes
stereo
+0 -0
America's Nationalistiest Crashes
America's Nationalistiest Crashes
theguitarhero
+0 -0
America's Next Top Car Crash Victim
America's Next Top Car Crash Victim
whiteturtle
+0 -0
World's Deadliest Crashes: The Musical
World's Deadliest Crashes: The Musical
theguitarhero
+0 -0
World's Deadliest Crashes: The Rock Opera
World's Deadliest Crashes: The Rock Opera
belgand
+0 -0
Jayne Mansfield Died In A Car Crash
Jayne Mansfield Died In A Car Crash
tripleg
+0 -0
So Did James Dean
So Did James Dean
belgand
+0 -0
That Was A Big Thing In The Movie (And Wasn't Jayne Mansfield As Well? I Cannot Recall), But Why Am I Still Talking Like This? I Am Not One Thousand Years Old And This Would Be The Wrong Way Regardless.
Oh and the new Fox series ("It's like Lost meets Taxicab Confessions meets the Earth unexpectedly!") Crash Sex . Watch for it this summer!
That Was A Big Thing In The Movie (And Wasn't Jayne Mansfield As Well? I Cannot Recall), But Why Am I Still Talking Like This? I Am Not One Thousand Years Old And This Would Be The Wrong Way Regardless.
Oh and the new Fox series ("It's like Lost meets Taxicab Confessions meets the Earth unexpectedly!") Crash Sex . Watch for it this summer!
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
Survivor: Deadly Car Crash
Survivor: Deadly Car Crash
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
There is no assetbar option for the chubbying of a whole thread.
Otherwise I'd group-hug that.
There is no assetbar option for the chubbying of a whole thread.
Otherwise I'd group-hug that.
belgand
+0 -0
The original Crash , based on the book of the same name was very good and another film where James Spader plays a character involved in psycho-sexual goings on. IIRC this is at least the third such character. Dude knows the right way to get typecast.
I never bothered to see the other piece of shit, but I'm very pissed that they used the name. Seriously, it was taken by a better movie that had a legitimate right to it. Pick another name for your bullshit movie. It's even just a fucking metaphor to begin with, it's not like you couldn't find another one.
The original Crash , based on the book of the same name was very good and another film where James Spader plays a character involved in psycho-sexual goings on. IIRC this is at least the third such character. Dude knows the right way to get typecast.
I never bothered to see the other piece of shit, but I'm very pissed that they used the name. Seriously, it was taken by a better movie that had a legitimate right to it. Pick another name for your bullshit movie. It's even just a fucking metaphor to begin with, it's not like you couldn't find another one.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Addendum: the original Crash was Amores Perros - 2000 - with Gael Garcia Bernal, among others- and a much better movie.
Life's a bitch
Addendum: the original Crash was Amores Perros - 2000 - with Gael Garcia Bernal, among others- and a much better movie.
Life's a bitch
rowboat
+0 -0
Thank you for reminding me of that movie. I have to see that again.
Thank you for reminding me of that movie. I have to see that again.
belgand
+0 -0
For some reason I always think of City of God when I think about it and vice-versa. I have no idea why. I mean, they're not even in the same language. Both were, however, excellent.
For some reason I always think of City of God when I think about it and vice-versa. I have no idea why. I mean, they're not even in the same language. Both were, however, excellent.
tekende
+0 -0
I was disgusted with it. That movie was so condescending and hackneyed. Stupid piece of shit is all it was.
I was disgusted with it. That movie was so condescending and hackneyed. Stupid piece of shit is all it was.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Sorry for partying.
No wait seriously, sorry for spoiling The Wrestler .
Also, I enjoy The Boss's music but I am not a good fan. I have only been into him since The Rising and I have not gone into the back catalog yet. Also, I recognize that The Boss's target audience is no longer the working man but the limousine liberals who donated money to Barack Obama's campaign and want populism sold to them in music form.
Sorry for partying.
No wait seriously, sorry for spoiling The Wrestler .
Also, I enjoy The Boss's music but I am not a good fan. I have only been into him since The Rising and I have not gone into the back catalog yet. Also, I recognize that The Boss's target audience is no longer the working man but the limousine liberals who donated money to Barack Obama's campaign and want populism sold to them in music form.
mattylite
+0 -0
You know, Ronald Reagan tried to get "Born in the USA" as his theme song but the Boss wouldn't give it to him. Even though it was a misguided idea anyhow, since the lyrics probably didn't mean what Ronald Reagan thought they meant.
And then they asked the boss to play at the superbowl for like 20 years in a row before he finally did it this year.
I mean, the dude held out for a pretty long time is all, and what you gonna do, he's still the Boss.
You know, Ronald Reagan tried to get "Born in the USA" as his theme song but the Boss wouldn't give it to him. Even though it was a misguided idea anyhow, since the lyrics probably didn't mean what Ronald Reagan thought they meant.
And then they asked the boss to play at the superbowl for like 20 years in a row before he finally did it this year.
I mean, the dude held out for a pretty long time is all, and what you gonna do, he's still the Boss.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -1
i ate a hamburger...and said 'hooray!'
i ate a hamburger...and said 'hooray!'
tekende
+0 -0
The only good thing Springsteen ever did was cover "Jersey Girl", thus providing Tom Waits with a steady income for the rest of his life.
The only good thing Springsteen ever did was cover "Jersey Girl", thus providing Tom Waits with a steady income for the rest of his life.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
HUGE slam on the Boss. Tekende goes for the takedown! No! Now he smacks Springsteen with a Folding Chair!
Oh, I can't believe what I'm seeing. He's beating the crap out of a 61-year old has-been!
Ohhhh....
HUGE slam on the Boss. Tekende goes for the takedown! No! Now he smacks Springsteen with a Folding Chair!
Oh, I can't believe what I'm seeing. He's beating the crap out of a 61-year old has-been!
Ohhhh....
tripleg
+0 -0
how does he feel about the staple gun?
how does he feel about the staple gun?
belgand
+0 -0
I think that Tom Waits might actually make a better Ramses.
I think that Tom Waits might actually make a better Ramses.
tekende
+0 -0
Now here's something you and I can agree on.
Now here's something you and I can agree on.
belgand
+0 -0
He already even has his own hat.
He already even has his own hat.
rowboat
+0 -0
It's cool, man. I mean, it's Aronofsky, so I already assumed that by the end of it Rourke'd either be dead or severely ass raped.
It's cool, man. I mean, it's Aronofsky, so I already assumed that by the end of it Rourke'd either be dead or severely ass raped.
stereo
+0 -0
Maybe even both!
Maybe even both!
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Severely ass raped to death .
Severely ass raped to death .
octafish
+0 -0
I'm pretty sure that is how Hyde killed the Invisible Man.
I'm pretty sure that is how Hyde killed the Invisible Man.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Man we can NOT go a week without referencing The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen !
Man we can NOT go a week without referencing The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen !
octafish
+0 -0
You started it!
You started it!
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Truth.
Truth.
somedarkholler
+0 -0
If you're interested in more Springsteen go all the way back to Born to Run (not gonna fuck with BBCode to make it look all pretty). It's when he's still young, and his blue collar passion sounds achingly earnest.
If you're interested in more Springsteen go all the way back to Born to Run (not gonna fuck with BBCode to make it look all pretty). It's when he's still young, and his blue collar passion sounds achingly earnest.
octafish
+0 -0
Nebraska. Nuff Said.
Nebraska. Nuff Said.
mattylite
+0 -0
Also, Darkness on the Edge of Town.
Also, The River.
Also, Born in the USA.
Also, Darkness on the Edge of Town.
Also, The River.
Also, Born in the USA.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
mickey spoiled it when he capitalized on his re-found fame and did fucking commercial for PETA .
the end does not justify the means and the road to hell is paved with good intentions. sure, neuter your dogs, but don't use PETA as a conduit to spread your 'good word'.
fuck, PETA, fuck Mickey Rourke and fuck " The Wrestler ". and just fuck pro wrestling all together. fuck.
mickey spoiled it when he capitalized on his re-found fame and did fucking commercial for PETA .
the end does not justify the means and the road to hell is paved with good intentions. sure, neuter your dogs, but don't use PETA as a conduit to spread your 'good word'.
fuck, PETA, fuck Mickey Rourke and fuck " The Wrestler ". and just fuck pro wrestling all together. fuck.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
the 1st 2 were classic.
the 1st 2 were classic.
somedarkholler
+0 -0
Oh man, as awesome as this was you totally just spoiled the Wrestler for me. I shan't lame you though, because I know you were only trying to do good.
Oh man, as awesome as this was you totally just spoiled the Wrestler for me. I shan't lame you though, because I know you were only trying to do good.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Ramses is so topical.
Also fuck Crash . I think I'm of the majority here when I say that.
Ramses is so topical.
Also fuck Crash . I think I'm of the majority here when I say that.
flazisismuss
+1 -0
When I first read the part about the horn I just assumed Ramses was getting ready to kick Satan's ass.
When I first read the part about the horn I just assumed Ramses was getting ready to kick Satan's ass.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I also mistook the intent of the word "horn"
I also mistook the intent of the word "horn"
foea
+1 -0
Can you imagine what Ramses would do to someone for grabbing their human horn at him?
Can you imagine what Ramses would do to someone for grabbing their human horn at him?
stereo
+2 -0
And if they grabbed their lower human horn, it would be even worse!
And if they grabbed their lower human horn, it would be even worse!
overman
+0 -0
I am really disappointed in Ray for not having proper ringtonage, it must be a new phone.
I am really disappointed in Ray for not having proper ringtonage, it must be a new phone.
belgand
+9 -0
Some of us have only one ringtone. It sounds like the phone is ringing. We have no time for any other sort of bullshit. My phone should not sing to me, it simply alerts me to an incoming call.
Some of us have only one ringtone. It sounds like the phone is ringing. We have no time for any other sort of bullshit. My phone should not sing to me, it simply alerts me to an incoming call.
zaratustra
+0 -0
I hate people with a regular ringtone because I always think it's -my- phone ringing
even though my cellphone has the Kill Bill ditty as the ringtone
figures
I hate people with a regular ringtone because I always think it's -my- phone ringing
even though my cellphone has the Kill Bill ditty as the ringtone
figures
belgand
+0 -0
Do you mean Al Hirt's (technically Billy May orchestrated it, but Hirt is most associated with it for his trumpet solo) notable theme music for The Green Hornet itself based off of "Flight of the Bumblebee"?
Or do you mean closing theme from Lady Snowblood that he also used in the film? Because that would make for a poor ringtone I suspect.
Do you mean Al Hirt's (technically Billy May orchestrated it, but Hirt is most associated with it for his trumpet solo) notable theme music for The Green Hornet itself based off of "Flight of the Bumblebee"?
Or do you mean closing theme from Lady Snowblood that he also used in the film? Because that would make for a poor ringtone I suspect.
daidai
+0 -0
Um, hello .
Um, hello .
belgand
+1 -0
Ah, I didn't even think someone would use the Twisted Nerve theme as a strong association. I guess I could also have called out the bit from Navajo Joe , but again, I didn't think that would be overly associated. Might make for a decent ringtone though.
If you must there are basically two great riffs to use for ringtones: The opening riff from Aqualung or the main keyboard riff from The Final Countdown bringin' it all GOB style.
Ah, I didn't even think someone would use the Twisted Nerve theme as a strong association. I guess I could also have called out the bit from Navajo Joe , but again, I didn't think that would be overly associated. Might make for a decent ringtone though.
If you must there are basically two great riffs to use for ringtones: The opening riff from Aqualung or the main keyboard riff from The Final Countdown bringin' it all GOB style.
jujubeesforjesus
+0 -0
Yeesh, stop trying to be the number one kill bill nerd on the internet already.
Yeesh, stop trying to be the number one kill bill nerd on the internet already.
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Why don't I just spoil it so we can talk about something else:
She kills Bill.
Why don't I just spoil it so we can talk about something else:
She kills Bill.
johnny_diamond
+1 -0
man. fuck . i had it all queued up and everthing.
man. fuck . i had it all queued up and everthing.
morypcaina
+0 -0
Not having seen Kill Bill, I associate this most with it: (thanks to the trailer, probably)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eG2_kpSYxXI&feature=related
DUN DUN DUN!
Not having seen Kill Bill, I associate this most with it: (thanks to the trailer, probably)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eG2_kpSYxXI&feature=related
DUN DUN DUN!
zaratustra
+0 -0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwEkhx6SinM this one.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwEkhx6SinM this one.
belgand
+0 -0
OK, let's just all agree that Kill Bill had a lot of great audio moments in it mainly because it stole them from a wide array of sources that had really great themes in them.
OK, let's just all agree that Kill Bill had a lot of great audio moments in it mainly because it stole them from a wide array of sources that had really great themes in them.
telescreen
+0 -0
Dude....did I hear you today? There could only be one person in the whole world with that ringtone so I shall assume it is you. Were you...in a...library, of the undergraduate kind?
Dude....did I hear you today? There could only be one person in the whole world with that ringtone so I shall assume it is you. Were you...in a...library, of the undergraduate kind?
zaratustra
+0 -0
I was in Brazil
I was in Brazil
wingspan
+0 -0
Where you...in a...library, of the undergraduate kind... in Brazil ?
Where you...in a...library, of the undergraduate kind... in Brazil ?
woodenteeth
+1 -0
Belgand also like crisply pressed, coloured shirts, preferably grey. Buildings should all be built in a good Utalitarianist style. Four walls, cement, maybe a balcony and a window.
Belgand also like crisply pressed, coloured shirts, preferably grey. Buildings should all be built in a good Utalitarianist style. Four walls, cement, maybe a balcony and a window.
vheissu
+0 -0
...and he wants you to get off his lawn.
...and he wants you to get off his lawn.
belgand
+1 -0
Honestly I'm really a fan of harsh minimalism when it comes to interior design. More or less nothing but 90 degree angles, boxy as hell all the way. Just matte black, brushed steel, and glass.
My ideal building would be a featureless black cube with no obvious entrances.
Honestly I'm really a fan of harsh minimalism when it comes to interior design. More or less nothing but 90 degree angles, boxy as hell all the way. Just matte black, brushed steel, and glass.
My ideal building would be a featureless black cube with no obvious entrances.
kickstart
+1 -0
Brutal.
Brutal.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Entirely the style I was thinking. Massive chubs for making a classy point.
Entirely the style I was thinking. Massive chubs for making a classy point.
belgand
+0 -0
I'm actually not a big fan of brutalism. I really want to be, but honestly it usually ends up looking like the cheapest damn way to make incredibly ugly municipal buildings that look dated and trashy. I want to believe that it can be done well because there is promise in it, but so rarely do people ever really do so.
I'm actually not a big fan of brutalism. I really want to be, but honestly it usually ends up looking like the cheapest damn way to make incredibly ugly municipal buildings that look dated and trashy. I want to believe that it can be done well because there is promise in it, but so rarely do people ever really do so.
hamscout
+0 -0
belgand, I believe there is a building like that in the Metaverse.
Read Snow Crash, if you haven't already, kids!
belgand, I believe there is a building like that in the Metaverse.
Read Snow Crash, if you haven't already, kids!
belgand
+0 -0
I know. I was re-reading it one day when I realized that it was the ideal building and I strongly desired to live in it.
I know. I was re-reading it one day when I realized that it was the ideal building and I strongly desired to live in it.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I did wonder if that may have been a fascination... that or you're pulling my chain.
I did wonder if that may have been a fascination... that or you're pulling my chain.
belgand
+0 -0
Definitely no chain-pulling. I'm not the type to jerk off to Dwell or anything, but I'm certainly a strong fan of modern design and minimalism. Just not the cutesy stuff or where someone is trying so goddamned hard to make something seem consciously different. But a big rectangle of solid wood stained in a very dark shade? That is an ideal coffee table.
Definitely no chain-pulling. I'm not the type to jerk off to Dwell or anything, but I'm certainly a strong fan of modern design and minimalism. Just not the cutesy stuff or where someone is trying so goddamned hard to make something seem consciously different. But a big rectangle of solid wood stained in a very dark shade? That is an ideal coffee table.
vheissu
+0 -0
While I have chilled on the whole buying ringtones thing, I don't mind shelling out for one or two so that I never grab for my phone when it is not ringing.
While I have chilled on the whole buying ringtones thing, I don't mind shelling out for one or two so that I never grab for my phone when it is not ringing.
tekende
+0 -0
I just keep my phone on vibrate. That way I don't ever have to worry about a ringtone disturbing a social situation or movie or something.
I just keep my phone on vibrate. That way I don't ever have to worry about a ringtone disturbing a social situation or movie or something.
wingspan
+0 -0
i also follow this route. the only downside is that every now and then it'll somehow end up back on ring-mode and when it goes off I don't recognize it cause i honestly have no idea what my ringtone is.
i also follow this route. the only downside is that every now and then it'll somehow end up back on ring-mode and when it goes off I don't recognize it cause i honestly have no idea what my ringtone is.
mattylite
+0 -0
This happens to me too. I think it's on some really terrible one too.
This happens to me too. I think it's on some really terrible one too.
history
+0 -0
In principle I agree with you...screw all that nonsense. However, I have 2 rings. My better half has her own ring when she calls. She after all, controls the more..umm...satisfying aspects of my life. However, it must also be noted her ring tone is Freak on a Leash. Draw your own conclusions.
In principle I agree with you...screw all that nonsense. However, I have 2 rings. My better half has her own ring when she calls. She after all, controls the more..umm...satisfying aspects of my life. However, it must also be noted her ring tone is Freak on a Leash. Draw your own conclusions.
wozzeck
+0 -0
I conclude that you listen to terrible music.
Terrible.
I conclude that you listen to terrible music.
Terrible.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i am a huge fan of the old bell-style ring. i was bummed when i found my enV didn't have it but then a thing occured so now i have my razr back, WHICH HAS IT.
but my default tone right now is the final chorus of Invaders Must Die by The Prodigy .
i am a huge fan of the old bell-style ring. i was bummed when i found my enV didn't have it but then a thing occured so now i have my razr back, WHICH HAS IT.
but my default tone right now is the final chorus of Invaders Must Die by The Prodigy .
theguitarhero
+0 -0
My ringtone is pretty famous, I would say.
My ringtone is pretty famous, I would say.
mystkmanat
+0 -0
Fuck you, theguitarhero!!!
And by "fuck you," I mean "V-chub."
Fuck you, theguitarhero!!!
And by "fuck you," I mean "V-chub."
theguitarhero
+0 -0
That seriously is my ringtone though. I just keep my phone on vibrate most of the time because people in the public will not get the joke.
That seriously is my ringtone though. I just keep my phone on vibrate most of the time because people in the public will not get the joke.
pityparty
+0 -1
I used to have that as my ringtone before I lost 30lbs, gained girlfriend and renounced anime porn forever.
I used to have that as my ringtone before I lost 30lbs, gained girlfriend and renounced anime porn forever.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Oh haha too bad I'm underweight, have a girlfriend and am only into real people porn.
checkmate, pityparty. checkmate.
Oh haha too bad I'm underweight, have a girlfriend and am only into real people porn.
checkmate, pityparty. checkmate.
awksedperl
+0 -0
Check out Nick Lowe's "All Men Are Liars" if you get the chance. It name-checks "Never Gonna Give You Up" in an amusing fashion.
Check out Nick Lowe's "All Men Are Liars" if you get the chance. It name-checks "Never Gonna Give You Up" in an amusing fashion.
fireking
+10 -0
when ramses calls, the phone fucking rings .
he ain't got time for no chris brown garbage
when ramses calls, the phone fucking rings .
he ain't got time for no chris brown garbage
whiteturtle
+8 -0
R-R-RRRING! is the new single from Sexual Homeboys. The next line is
R-R-RRRING!
You know I'm calling you, shorty
Because I want to have sex with you
R-R-RRRING! is the new single from Sexual Homeboys. The next line is
R-R-RRRING!
You know I'm calling you, shorty
Because I want to have sex with you
belgand
+0 -0
Isn't "shorty" a child? I am confused on this matter and apparently I am not alone.
Isn't "shorty" a child? I am confused on this matter and apparently I am not alone.
dangelder
+0 -0
Not in public.
Not in public.
tripleg
+0 -0
the meaning is fluid
the meaning is fluid
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I called my friend shorty because she was short. Also she was a fine female, so it worked.
I called my friend shorty because she was short. Also she was a fine female, so it worked.
tripleg
+0 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I've refreshed several times and I don't see it.
I've refreshed several times and I don't see it.
tripleg
+0 -0
i fail at bbcode, apparently. dreadfully sorry.
i fail at bbcode, apparently. dreadfully sorry.
rowboat
+0 -0
A shorty can be either your girlfriend or your child. It is one of the unfortunate crossroads of black slang. I don't think they planned it that way.
A shorty can be either your girlfriend or your child. It is one of the unfortunate crossroads of black slang. I don't think they planned it that way.
belgand
+0 -0
Why can't it be both?
Why can't it be both?
rowboat
+2 -0
It is. That's what I said.
It is. That's what I said.
stereo
+0 -0
The intersection between lover and daughter is not the place to geT-boned.
The intersection between lover and daughter is not the place to geT-boned.
fermatprime
+0 -0
or just get boned
or just get boned
daidai
+0 -0
... boned?
(oh lord that was contrived)
... boned?
(oh lord that was contrived)
cbtbone
+0 -0
...contrived?
...contrived?
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
?
?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
[i]
[i]
falseprophet
+0 -0
Why does nearly every man with balls in this country call his girl "Baby" or "Hot Mama" or say "Who's Your Daddy?" during the act of fuckmaking?
Before you start telling people they got cancer of the testicles you should rub your own lumps first.
Why does nearly every man with balls in this country call his girl "Baby" or "Hot Mama" or say "Who's Your Daddy?" during the act of fuckmaking?
Before you start telling people they got cancer of the testicles you should rub your own lumps first.
stereo
+2 -0
"Oh gosh, I'm coming" wins it for me.
"Oh gosh, I'm coming" wins it for me.
rowboat
+4 -0
What ever happened to a good old "I'm sorry?"
What ever happened to a good old "I'm sorry?"
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
What about "don't tell mommy or your bunny gets it."
What about "don't tell mommy or your bunny gets it."
belgand
+0 -0
I prefer to call her by her sister or mother's name at the moment of orgasm.
On that note, however, what ever happened to "slut", "whore", "prostitute", "dollymop", or "fallen woman"?
I prefer to call her by her sister or mother's name at the moment of orgasm.
On that note, however, what ever happened to "slut", "whore", "prostitute", "dollymop", or "fallen woman"?
tekende
+0 -0
Or a simple "classy lady" but you make quotation marks in the air with your fingers while saying "classy"
Or a simple "classy lady" but you make quotation marks in the air with your fingers while saying "classy"
belgand
+0 -0
I prefer to inflect my voice to convey that as air quotes would not be classy and would put me into a post-modern loop.
I prefer to inflect my voice to convey that as air quotes would not be classy and would put me into a post-modern loop.
scorpio_nadir
+4 -0
Testikles! What news from the Oncologians? Is....is King Prostateus in good health, we pray?
Testikles! What news from the Oncologians? Is....is King Prostateus in good health, we pray?
scorpio_nadir
+0 -1
When Ramses picks up to call, the phone weeps and apologizes, asking who he wants to talk to.
When Ramses picks up to call, the phone weeps and apologizes, asking who he wants to talk to.
vheissu
+2 -0
I don't like where this is going. You're making Ramses sounds like the new Chuck Norris. We do not need a new Chuck Norris.
I don't like where this is going. You're making Ramses sounds like the new Chuck Norris. We do not need a new Chuck Norris.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
Okay, fine, I'll lame my own comment. You're absolutely correct.
Okay, fine, I'll lame my own comment. You're absolutely correct.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
It says I can't rate my own comment, just so you know I tried.
It says I can't rate my own comment, just so you know I tried.
vheissu
+0 -0
That netted you 1 Lame and 2 Chubbies, for the 3 comments respectively.
Don't worry about it, though; you are not the only one guilty of such things on this comic. It's tempting, because he IS a bad-ass.
That netted you 1 Lame and 2 Chubbies, for the 3 comments respectively.
Don't worry about it, though; you are not the only one guilty of such things on this comic. It's tempting, because he IS a bad-ass.
varnish
+0 -0
You'd think it would play Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring.
You'd think it would play Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring.
daidai
+1 -0
Ray's phone doesn't just ring. The letters actually pop out of the phone.
Ray's phone doesn't just ring. The letters actually pop out of the phone.
plummet
+0 -0
I'm surprised he has such an oldschool phone to begin with
I would expect him to have bluetooth and a trendy smartphone
I'm surprised he has such an oldschool phone to begin with
I would expect him to have bluetooth and a trendy smartphone
jonno
+0 -0
Bluetooth is for chunkity-ass nerds.
Bluetooth is for chunkity-ass nerds.
lastlarf
+2 -0
Roaming around, charming the ladies, getting in to fights, Ramses is just an old fashioned Tom Cat doing what Tom Cats are meant to do.
Roaming around, charming the ladies, getting in to fights, Ramses is just an old fashioned Tom Cat doing what Tom Cats are meant to do.
belgand
+1 -0
I had never actually thought of this, but it is so incredibly apt I am amazed I did not. It also casts a new and interesting light onto Ray as he is basically attempting to do the same thing, but in a different sort of way. He is not the raw alley cat that his father is, but a pampered suburban Tom.
I had never actually thought of this, but it is so incredibly apt I am amazed I did not. It also casts a new and interesting light onto Ray as he is basically attempting to do the same thing, but in a different sort of way. He is not the raw alley cat that his father is, but a pampered suburban Tom.
falseprophet
+5 -0
And he has not had his own children. He just has a nephew like a Disney character from the '30s.
Which would make him an Uncle Tom.
And he has not had his own children. He just has a nephew like a Disney character from the '30s.
Which would make him an Uncle Tom.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
I thought you meant Scrooge McDuck.
I thought you meant Scrooge McDuck.
bixschmix
+4 -0
all diving into those coins and getting small circular bruises
all diving into those coins and getting small circular bruises
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
where's the eighty-two cents, kid?
[/house]
where's the eighty-two cents, kid?
[/house]
aperson
+0 -0
Phone him back Ray! Ray! Call the number!
Phone him back Ray! Ray! Call the number!
gormster
+0 -0
second. panel.
second. panel.
aperson
+0 -0
...does 'unknown number' mean 'number withheld' in the US?
...does 'unknown number' mean 'number withheld' in the US?
cbtbone
+0 -0
Actually, it most often means "telemarketer," in my experience.
Actually, it most often means "telemarketer," in my experience.
tekende
+0 -0
Or "debt collector"
in my experience
Or "debt collector"
in my experience
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
my family's house phone was blocked for the longest time. then we stopped paying for it. they kept blocking the number.
it was rad.
my family's house phone was blocked for the longest time. then we stopped paying for it. they kept blocking the number.
it was rad.
deadpool
+0 -0
I wonder what kind of drink Ramses enjoys with his calzones.
I wonder what kind of drink Ramses enjoys with his calzones.
nice-on-water
+1 -0
Pepsi with too much ice in a Styrofoam pizzeria cup.
[IMGS OFF]
No airs on this beverage, son.
Pepsi with too much ice in a Styrofoam pizzeria cup.
[IMGS OFF]
No airs on this beverage, son.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
Ramses always has an ice cold budweiser in his back pocket, right next to his can of chew, because he is a character from a frigging 1951 magazine ad.
Ramses always has an ice cold budweiser in his back pocket, right next to his can of chew, because he is a character from a frigging 1951 magazine ad.
spinynorman
+0 -0
Dude, isn't that like the perfect pizzeria drink? I remember in college they had this little pizzeria place in the Union Mall off campus... I swear having the two good slices with a styrofoam cup with too much ice was like a perfect part of that equation.
Heigh ho, halcyon days.
Dude, isn't that like the perfect pizzeria drink? I remember in college they had this little pizzeria place in the Union Mall off campus... I swear having the two good slices with a styrofoam cup with too much ice was like a perfect part of that equation.
Heigh ho, halcyon days.
whiteturtle
+7 -0
You forgot a straw so you just drink from the side, but there is too much ice, and it is kind of sticking together. You can't tilt the glass too much because if you do the ice will avalanche into your face and spill Pepsi all over your shirt and you have English 235 next, and Sarah is in there. You don't want to spill on yourself, so you only take small sips, and it is the first warm day of spring, so maybe she decided to bust out the spaghetti straps early. The pizza is good. The pepperoni is crisp and the Pepsi is so cold.
Then you get a job and debt.
You forgot a straw so you just drink from the side, but there is too much ice, and it is kind of sticking together. You can't tilt the glass too much because if you do the ice will avalanche into your face and spill Pepsi all over your shirt and you have English 235 next, and Sarah is in there. You don't want to spill on yourself, so you only take small sips, and it is the first warm day of spring, so maybe she decided to bust out the spaghetti straps early. The pizza is good. The pepperoni is crisp and the Pepsi is so cold.
Then you get a job and debt.
spinynorman
+0 -0
No, I sipped the Pepsi. For some reason sipping it made it colder.
The rest all accurate, though.
No, I sipped the Pepsi. For some reason sipping it made it colder.
The rest all accurate, though.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Oh god, that is my life plus will be my life. Darn soda.
Oh god, that is my life plus will be my life. Darn soda.
belgand
+0 -0
Oddly though I usually prefer Pepsi the cheap place across the street from my dorm* had Coke and they did the syrup just right so it was a bit thicker and sweeter and just worked perfectly. It was the ideal beverage for your pizza regardless of your allegiance. That or one of the also extra-syrupy perfectly sweet Sprites. Man, when people do lemon-lime just a bit too sweet it is the absolute best.
*sigh* I really dislike that so many places around here don't have soda fountains. They all just try to charge you $1.50 for a damn can. No refills, just a huge mark-up on something they bought from the store.
*Where you got ripped-off for delivery, but could always walk-in and get a "special" (so they could claim free delivery) of one pizza (they only made 10" pies) with one topping and a Coke for $5. Plus they're open until 3 AM every night of the week. Hell, nothing around here is open that late and it's a major city. My damn corner store closes at 10!
Oddly though I usually prefer Pepsi the cheap place across the street from my dorm* had Coke and they did the syrup just right so it was a bit thicker and sweeter and just worked perfectly. It was the ideal beverage for your pizza regardless of your allegiance. That or one of the also extra-syrupy perfectly sweet Sprites. Man, when people do lemon-lime just a bit too sweet it is the absolute best.
*sigh* I really dislike that so many places around here don't have soda fountains. They all just try to charge you $1.50 for a damn can. No refills, just a huge mark-up on something they bought from the store.
*Where you got ripped-off for delivery, but could always walk-in and get a "special" (so they could claim free delivery) of one pizza (they only made 10" pies) with one topping and a Coke for $5. Plus they're open until 3 AM every night of the week. Hell, nothing around here is open that late and it's a major city. My damn corner store closes at 10!
stereo
+3 -0
There was a Doctor Pepper fountain at the first residence I stayed in at university.
Shit was so cash.
There was a Doctor Pepper fountain at the first residence I stayed in at university.
Shit was so cash.
daidai
+0 -0
I like my soda as thick as the shit they drink in Monsters Inc.
I like my soda as thick as the shit they drink in Monsters Inc.
daidai
+0 -0
oh my god drink and Inc. rhyme.
i need to write an album. i am the white snoopy
oh my god drink and Inc. rhyme.
i need to write an album. i am the white snoopy
tekende
+0 -0
They drink shit in that movie?
They drink shit in that movie?
jonno
+2 -0
Yes but it is portrayed quite tastefully so it is not all that offensive.
Yes but it is portrayed quite tastefully so it is not all that offensive.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
if you were trying for something, it almost worked.
if you were trying for something, it almost worked.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Man we ain't got nothing but fountains round these parts. And a pie will never cost less than $9, but that's fine because if I ever paid $5 for a pie and topping and drink, I would be very suspicious.
Man we ain't got nothing but fountains round these parts. And a pie will never cost less than $9, but that's fine because if I ever paid $5 for a pie and topping and drink, I would be very suspicious.
belgand
+0 -0
Nah, you are getting a small 10" or so. Just a slice or two more than a personal pizza so you have something to go in your mini-fridge. They also had specials where going up to three, IIRC, you could get volume discounts of maybe fifty to seventy-five cents per pizza if you were ordering with friends.
This was just because they knew they could get solid business from the dorms and a few of the campus buildings right across the street, but other people would ludicrously order delivery for like $7-8 for just plain cheese.
It was a fairly solid product and while it wasn't great (and friends will occasionally mention how mediocre they were) I still have fond memories of it. I remember exactly how it tasted and while it wasn't fancy it was very solid. Much better than Domino's. Then again, I've seen goats who will not eat Domino's.
Nah, you are getting a small 10" or so. Just a slice or two more than a personal pizza so you have something to go in your mini-fridge. They also had specials where going up to three, IIRC, you could get volume discounts of maybe fifty to seventy-five cents per pizza if you were ordering with friends.
This was just because they knew they could get solid business from the dorms and a few of the campus buildings right across the street, but other people would ludicrously order delivery for like $7-8 for just plain cheese.
It was a fairly solid product and while it wasn't great (and friends will occasionally mention how mediocre they were) I still have fond memories of it. I remember exactly how it tasted and while it wasn't fancy it was very solid. Much better than Domino's. Then again, I've seen goats who will not eat Domino's.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Ketel 1.
Ketel 1.
fineoakstructure
+14 -2
The only reason I dread a Ramses strip is because it means that half of the comments on here are going to be people trying to one-up each other on how badass Ramses is.
Ramses really is just an oustanding prick in a world where he no longer holds any relevance; ever since the wedding he's just seemed like a confused old codger (hates vegetarians, doesn't want certain types teaching at schools, etc.). Ramses, like Wild Bill, is gonna get shot in the back by a coward. That ain't so badass.
Am I the only one who thinks Onstad subverts the legend of Ramses as much as he genuflects to it?
The only reason I dread a Ramses strip is because it means that half of the comments on here are going to be people trying to one-up each other on how badass Ramses is.
Ramses really is just an oustanding prick in a world where he no longer holds any relevance; ever since the wedding he's just seemed like a confused old codger (hates vegetarians, doesn't want certain types teaching at schools, etc.). Ramses, like Wild Bill, is gonna get shot in the back by a coward. That ain't so badass.
Am I the only one who thinks Onstad subverts the legend of Ramses as much as he genuflects to it?
carrot
+4 -0
Ramses is so badass that your hurtful comments mean nothing to him.
Ramses is so badass that your hurtful comments mean nothing to him.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
yearsinhotclaws had a similar opinion that i recollect
we made a comic about it
halcyon days
:_(
yearsinhotclaws had a similar opinion that i recollect
we made a comic about it
halcyon days
:_(
whiteturtle
+0 -0
Right? Is it just me or did Onstad's hiatus kind of kill off a burgeoning community? I don't want to start anything, because it doesn't make me mad, he doesn't owe us an online community, I'm just making an observation.
Right? Is it just me or did Onstad's hiatus kind of kill off a burgeoning community? I don't want to start anything, because it doesn't make me mad, he doesn't owe us an online community, I'm just making an observation.
autrepoupee
+3 -0
:_( where have all the loneals gone
long time passing
misty water colored achilleselbows
corners of your... mind
:_( where have all the loneals gone
long time passing
misty water colored achilleselbows
corners of your... mind
whiteturtle
+1 -0
aw. loneal. man, she ain't never coming back. She was so mad at the internet for being full of teenage boys.
aw. loneal. man, she ain't never coming back. She was so mad at the internet for being full of teenage boys.
rowboat
+0 -0
Achilleselbow, on the other hand, is Control F'n his shit as we speak.
Achilleselbow, on the other hand, is Control F'n his shit as we speak.
drskradley
+0 -0
I thought we all Ctrl F'd our shit. I certainly do, because I'm an unabashed egotist and get my emotional validation from other people's opinions and attention.
That having been said, as Spiny Norman puts it below, I haven't felt motivated to contribute that much for a fair while - before The Collapse, even. I started trolling to engage my interest and for creative exercise, but that's fallen by the wayside for the moment.
Given the culling of our numbers, it may result in a Fourth Age of Assetbar, similar to the Second Age. A time when chubbies actually meant something, and people didn't post all the fucking time.
But is that just me being an idealist from a time that long gone, and my pining for it has resulted in the change passing me by? If I don't admit that the waters around me have grown, better I start swimming lest I sink like a stone?
I thought we all Ctrl F'd our shit. I certainly do, because I'm an unabashed egotist and get my emotional validation from other people's opinions and attention.
That having been said, as Spiny Norman puts it below, I haven't felt motivated to contribute that much for a fair while - before The Collapse, even. I started trolling to engage my interest and for creative exercise, but that's fallen by the wayside for the moment.
Given the culling of our numbers, it may result in a Fourth Age of Assetbar, similar to the Second Age. A time when chubbies actually meant something, and people didn't post all the fucking time.
But is that just me being an idealist from a time that long gone, and my pining for it has resulted in the change passing me by? If I don't admit that the waters around me have grown, better I start swimming lest I sink like a stone?
falseprophet
+0 -0
I started Ctrl F'in my shit once I realized that it was a lot easier than using the Assetbar INBOX. Unfortunately, I pretty much have to go into the inbox if I want to see more recent replies to things I've said on past strips, but I rarely even care at this point. Sure, maybe once in a while I will try to finish a discussion on an old strip in the wee hours that a new strip has just been posted, but it's pointless. There is no continuity here. I wind up forgetting what's been said on previous strips. My imprint is wiped, like I'm in Dollhouse . You can't create memories and you can't make friends on the Internet.
Seriously though, it'd be nice if Assetbar's INBOX had a collapsible thread system so that you'd only see the most immediate replies to your comments and then a parentheses and number for replies to those replies. And maybe also the ability to see how many chubbies and lames each comment in the SENT page got for easier ego-stroking. And maybe putting new comment replies in bold. The paid Assetbar has that in its Inbox. It's soft and comforting to the touch.
I started Ctrl F'in my shit once I realized that it was a lot easier than using the Assetbar INBOX. Unfortunately, I pretty much have to go into the inbox if I want to see more recent replies to things I've said on past strips, but I rarely even care at this point. Sure, maybe once in a while I will try to finish a discussion on an old strip in the wee hours that a new strip has just been posted, but it's pointless. There is no continuity here. I wind up forgetting what's been said on previous strips. My imprint is wiped, like I'm in Dollhouse . You can't create memories and you can't make friends on the Internet.
Seriously though, it'd be nice if Assetbar's INBOX had a collapsible thread system so that you'd only see the most immediate replies to your comments and then a parentheses and number for replies to those replies. And maybe also the ability to see how many chubbies and lames each comment in the SENT page got for easier ego-stroking. And maybe putting new comment replies in bold. The paid Assetbar has that in its Inbox. It's soft and comforting to the touch.
rowboat
+0 -0
How are things over there? I've been debating signing up again. I want to make sure the boards have improved before I do. The content was pretty great for the brief time that I was there, but most of the posters were of the worst variety. I'll take "CLITS LOVE EM" over "Haha, this is a funny comic" any damn day.
How are things over there? I've been debating signing up again. I want to make sure the boards have improved before I do. The content was pretty great for the brief time that I was there, but most of the posters were of the worst variety. I'll take "CLITS LOVE EM" over "Haha, this is a funny comic" any damn day.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Haha, this is a funny post. I give it a 5.
I use the line in the second sentence all the time in my real life.
I have some friends that are real M&M people!
Haha, this is a funny post. I give it a 5.
I use the line in the second sentence all the time in my real life.
I have some friends that are real M&M people!
rowboat
+0 -0
Oh, you old so-and-so!
Oh, you old so-and-so!
yearsinhotclaws
+3 -0
I'm control f'in
finding my religion
trying to keep up with you
And I don't care what you say
unless it is about me
Every whisper
Every baby shower
we're making no decisions
paying a tab isn't worth it
when the bartender likes my work, jerk
Oh no, I've read too much
I havn't read enough
Thats us in our corners
after the barfights
we both like the transformers
and we've got every night to lose
If I had known your fantasy
was having optimus prime for a dad
I wouldn't have laughed
so much
I thought that I heard you crapping
your thoughts on a computer screen
I think I thought I saw you
give yourself to me
but that was just a dream
beer and fear, you think I'm weird (al)
pay my tab and leave
just a dream
I'm control f'in
finding my religion
trying to keep up with you
And I don't care what you say
unless it is about me
Every whisper
Every baby shower
we're making no decisions
paying a tab isn't worth it
when the bartender likes my work, jerk
Oh no, I've read too much
I havn't read enough
Thats us in our corners
after the barfights
we both like the transformers
and we've got every night to lose
If I had known your fantasy
was having optimus prime for a dad
I wouldn't have laughed
so much
I thought that I heard you crapping
your thoughts on a computer screen
I think I thought I saw you
give yourself to me
but that was just a dream
beer and fear, you think I'm weird (al)
pay my tab and leave
just a dream
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Pleased to see you're back!
Pleased to see you're back!
rowboat
+0 -0
You were losing me up till the Transformers bit. Now you'll never lose me.
You were losing me up till the Transformers bit. Now you'll never lose me.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
I only did so after receiving an anonymous tip that I was being mentioned.
It's funny how even on Facebook, theguitarhero takes up most of the news feed.
I only did so after receiving an anonymous tip that I was being mentioned.
It's funny how even on Facebook, theguitarhero takes up most of the news feed.
spinynorman
+0 -0
I'm still here. For some reason since The Collapse I haven't felt as motivated to contribute. Anyone else feel the same?
I'm still here. For some reason since The Collapse I haven't felt as motivated to contribute. Anyone else feel the same?
whiteturtle
+0 -0
Ditto. There must be a sociological/psychological explanation for it, but that is not my field.
Ditto. There must be a sociological/psychological explanation for it, but that is not my field.
the_dingle
+8 -0
It's cause you're a bunch of damned fools on the internet, coining "The Collapse" and other such fool terms.
It's cause you're a bunch of damned fools on the internet, coining "The Collapse" and other such fool terms.
whiteturtle
+1 -0
You saw that I wrote "sociological/psychological", said to yourself "hey, I studied that" and then decided to comment without applying what you studied. That is why you work in customer service.
You saw that I wrote "sociological/psychological", said to yourself "hey, I studied that" and then decided to comment without applying what you studied. That is why you work in customer service.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
or retail.
or retail.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
where i first heard that term.
where i first heard that term.
spinynorman
+0 -0
Yeah, I was feeling nostalgic about video games of old, so I was reading up on them on wikipedia, and even though I've never played DE2 that term wormed itself into my head and seemed appropriate for such a melodramatic reference.
Yeah, I was feeling nostalgic about video games of old, so I was reading up on them on wikipedia, and even though I've never played DE2 that term wormed itself into my head and seemed appropriate for such a melodramatic reference.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
dx2 is not as much fun as the first one. just fyi.
dx2 is not as much fun as the first one. just fyi.
aperson
+1 -0
The Collapse is better than The Febrility - remember that phase?
The Collapse is better than The Febrility - remember that phase?
octafish
+0 -0
The Great Recession?
The Great Recession?
hamscout
+1 -0
Obama gave me a stimulus check, and I have been commenting as much as I can, to support the asseteconomy.
But, until I can get a new job, my photobuggery has been significantly cut back.
Obama gave me a stimulus check, and I have been commenting as much as I can, to support the asseteconomy.
But, until I can get a new job, my photobuggery has been significantly cut back.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
SpinyNorman, do you post on the AV Club?
SpinyNorman, do you post on the AV Club?
spinynorman
+0 -0
Yeah, occasionally.
Yeah, occasionally.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I was just wondering because I've seen you there and found it strange, wasn't sure if it was an imposter or not, and my username there is different than the one here (and I doubted you'd have recognized me anyway).
But anyway, that's cool.
I was just wondering because I've seen you there and found it strange, wasn't sure if it was an imposter or not, and my username there is different than the one here (and I doubted you'd have recognized me anyway).
But anyway, that's cool.
doc_rostov
+0 -0
I hear you. I haven't really felt like contributing majorly since I had tons of free time last summer, even though I still do tend to skim through the comments. On occasion.
And by occasion, I mean times like now, when I have two long statistics assignments to do and I'm waking up in 9 hours and it'll probably take 4 or 5 to finish the blasted things but spring break is in two days and I can't bring myself to work on anything until the stark necessity of exhaustion rends a sudden devotion to a big final effort to finish it all up but by then I am so exhausted I can't taste victory when I win all I can taste is a whopper this is a run on sentence I am a personified metajoke tonight.
I hear you. I haven't really felt like contributing majorly since I had tons of free time last summer, even though I still do tend to skim through the comments. On occasion.
And by occasion, I mean times like now, when I have two long statistics assignments to do and I'm waking up in 9 hours and it'll probably take 4 or 5 to finish the blasted things but spring break is in two days and I can't bring myself to work on anything until the stark necessity of exhaustion rends a sudden devotion to a big final effort to finish it all up but by then I am so exhausted I can't taste victory when I win all I can taste is a whopper this is a run on sentence I am a personified metajoke tonight.
stereo
+0 -0
I thought I had a big statistics assignment but it turns out it was only like 20 minutes work.
Leaving me with a whole lot of free time to mess about.
I thought I had a big statistics assignment but it turns out it was only like 20 minutes work.
Leaving me with a whole lot of free time to mess about.
hamscout
+3 -0
Statistically, that means you were in the 1.3% of individuals who misunderstood the assignment, and you have failed.
Also, there is a 43.7% chance that you contracted crabs from your "messin' about".
Statistically, that means you were in the 1.3% of individuals who misunderstood the assignment, and you have failed.
Also, there is a 43.7% chance that you contracted crabs from your "messin' about".
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I once thought I had a big stat assignment, but it turned out to be your mother.
I have more joke. It involves Markov chains, deviations, a small man named Ito, and a graph of a multimodal function. Then I realized that like, one other person here would find it remotely funny. So I played with myself instead.
I once thought I had a big stat assignment, but it turned out to be your mother.
I have more joke. It involves Markov chains, deviations, a small man named Ito, and a graph of a multimodal function. Then I realized that like, one other person here would find it remotely funny. So I played with myself instead.
stereo
+0 -0
As someone who wrote a 20 page paper on a piece of software whose sole function was plotting parallel plots, I may be that person.
As someone who wrote a 20 page paper on a piece of software whose sole function was plotting parallel plots, I may be that person.
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
also: me.
also: me.
bixschmix
+0 -0
Yes sir.
Yes sir.
tekende
+0 -0
I keep contributing because I am addicted. Sometimes I don't even enjoy it, but I have to keep coming here.
I keep contributing because I am addicted. Sometimes I don't even enjoy it, but I have to keep coming here.
woodenteeth
+1 -0
The first step is admitting you have a problem. The second is justifying why it isn't that bad. The third step is to - The first step is admitting you have a problem...
The first step is admitting you have a problem. The second is justifying why it isn't that bad. The third step is to - The first step is admitting you have a problem...
irondave
+1 -0
Communities are fluid, internet communities probably more than others. We are not killed. Maybe some of your favorites have vanished, get used to it. Life is like that.
Communities are fluid, internet communities probably more than others. We are not killed. Maybe some of your favorites have vanished, get used to it. Life is like that.
whiteturtle
+5 -2
nothing like being told to buck the fuck up and that life is like that. That is why being yelled at by your dad is so popular.
nothing like being told to buck the fuck up and that life is like that. That is why being yelled at by your dad is so popular.
irondave
+3 -0
Some day you'll understand.
Some day you'll understand.
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
One day, I'm gonna marry that girl...
I mean...finish that comic.
One day, I'm gonna marry that girl...
I mean...finish that comic.
rhadamanthus
+0 -0
I have to disagree. His actions at the wedding just show that he doesn't hide his convictions from much of anyone. Ramses is a gleaming beacon of badassery and moral clarity in the bottom of the abyss. Ain't his fault most people are crappy.
I have to disagree. His actions at the wedding just show that he doesn't hide his convictions from much of anyone. Ramses is a gleaming beacon of badassery and moral clarity in the bottom of the abyss. Ain't his fault most people are crappy.
jeffspaulding
+2 -0
Quote:
Yes, a veritable modern Diogenes.
Quote:
Ramses is a gleaming beacon of badassery and moral clarity
Yes, a veritable modern Diogenes.
morypcaina
+3 -0
except instead of ignoring his own physical safety he ignores yours
except instead of ignoring his own physical safety he ignores yours
belgand
+0 -0
Ramses needs to go out all Wild Bunch on this. His era is over and as much as we may romanticize it by doing so we forget both the terrifying brutality of it and how the men who revere were just as often monsters, but we also forget the times that were not so romantic, but when they were simply men.
Ramses needs to go out all Wild Bunch on this. His era is over and as much as we may romanticize it by doing so we forget both the terrifying brutality of it and how the men who revere were just as often monsters, but we also forget the times that were not so romantic, but when they were simply men.
mystkmanat
+0 -0
Agreed. A badass asshole is an asshole nonetheless.
Agreed. A badass asshole is an asshole nonetheless.
spinynorman
+8 -0
Everyone likes a badass until they actually meet one, and he wants money or to fuck your girlfriend. Then you realize badasses are sort of just kids who never really figured out how to be a man.
Everyone likes a badass until they actually meet one, and he wants money or to fuck your girlfriend. Then you realize badasses are sort of just kids who never really figured out how to be a man.
woodenteeth
+1 -0
Just throwing it out there that there is a very small horribly insubstantial piece of evidence that Ramses tried to kill his son with a 4WD.
Dickness.
Just throwing it out there that there is a very small horribly insubstantial piece of evidence that Ramses tried to kill his son with a 4WD.
Dickness.
jonno
+0 -0
The man is a badass litmus test. Ray survived it. They survived the fuck out of it.
The man is a badass litmus test. Ray survived it. They survived the fuck out of it.
belgand
+0 -0
Danny Trejo seems to be using his badassedness for good these days, but yeah, you generally get there by being a jerk.
Maybe if you're a Shaolin monk or something it's possible to not be a huge dick about being a total badass, but it's sure not an easy way to be.
Danny Trejo seems to be using his badassedness for good these days, but yeah, you generally get there by being a jerk.
Maybe if you're a Shaolin monk or something it's possible to not be a huge dick about being a total badass, but it's sure not an easy way to be.
notcool
+0 -0
Go read To Kill a Mockingbird and Something Wicked This Way Comes, back to back.
That's what a man should aspire to be.
Go read To Kill a Mockingbird and Something Wicked This Way Comes, back to back.
That's what a man should aspire to be.
spinynorman
+0 -0
There's a reason he was voted best hero by AFI. Even though AFI is mildly retarded.
There's a reason he was voted best hero by AFI. Even though AFI is mildly retarded.
owlings
+2 -0
Or, more succinctly (if'n y'don't mind, sir), a badass is an ass nonetheless. And not even a good one.
Or, more succinctly (if'n y'don't mind, sir), a badass is an ass nonetheless. And not even a good one.
mystkmanat
+0 -0
Not't'all. Chubby for you, good sir.
Not't'all. Chubby for you, good sir.
johnny_diamond
+0 -0
He sees the world in black and white. There is nothing wrong with that sort of conviction properly applied.
He sees the world in black and white. There is nothing wrong with that sort of conviction properly applied.
autrepoupee
+11 -0
well except for that the world is totally, unequivocally, not black and white
well except for that the world is totally, unequivocally, not black and white
stereo
+7 -0
Wow, huge slam on the colourblind out of nowhere!
Wow, huge slam on the colourblind out of nowhere!
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
In this country we say "colorblind."
Stick your u up your arse.
In this country we say "colorblind."
Stick your u up your arse.
stereo
+2 -0
I don't want u in my ass.
I don't want u in my ass.
fermatprime
+0 -0
No, it's sorta, kinda black and white
No, it's sorta, kinda black and white
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Racist!
Racist!
eidolem
+0 -0
Honestly. It don't matter if you're black or white.
Honestly. It don't matter if you're black or white.
machineelf
+0 -0
it's all pink on the inside
it's all pink on the inside
redphillip
+0 -0
I think Nice Pete would be able to fill out your limited spectrum. The color you will see all depends on where, and how, you look.
I think Nice Pete would be able to fill out your limited spectrum. The color you will see all depends on where, and how, you look.
fermatprime
+0 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
fermatprime
+0 -0
He just looks at you. He looks at you and he knows that you lied.
He just looks at you. He looks at you and he knows that you lied.
notcool
+0 -0
If it looks grey, then you need to look closer. It starts to get pixelated eventually.
Might not like what you see down at that rez, though.
If it looks grey, then you need to look closer. It starts to get pixelated eventually.
Might not like what you see down at that rez, though.
foea
+0 -0
Of course Onstad is making fun of the whole "my dad is so badass" business.
Of course Onstad is making fun of the whole "my dad is so badass" business.
spinynorman
+0 -0
Is anyone else contemplating developing cool habits just so later their kids will be impressed? I need to learn more about cars and become an amateur mechanic, or maybe a metalworker of some kind, and I'll be stoic all the time and cross my arms a lot. That's a cool dad, right?
Is anyone else contemplating developing cool habits just so later their kids will be impressed? I need to learn more about cars and become an amateur mechanic, or maybe a metalworker of some kind, and I'll be stoic all the time and cross my arms a lot. That's a cool dad, right?
stereo
+1 -0
I have the feeling I'm gonna be the one showing up at school on a tandem bike, all calling his name and waving my arms wildly, then riding off when I realize he's gotten a ride in his friend's Firebird again.
I have the feeling I'm gonna be the one showing up at school on a tandem bike, all calling his name and waving my arms wildly, then riding off when I realize he's gotten a ride in his friend's Firebird again.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
One of the secrets of fatherhood is that you are always uncool to your kid. Your kid will think you are lame until they are older. Then, they either think you are amazingly cooler than they are, or think you are an asshole that fucked them up for life. Either way, it has little to do with your actual, personal coolness
One of the secrets of fatherhood is that you are always uncool to your kid. Your kid will think you are lame until they are older. Then, they either think you are amazingly cooler than they are, or think you are an asshole that fucked them up for life. Either way, it has little to do with your actual, personal coolness
scorpio_nadir
+5 -0
This is not true.
If you are not a liar, tell them what you know, admit what you don't, and try to show some love, your kids will respect you.
Just like anyone else.
It's that simple.
This is not true.
If you are not a liar, tell them what you know, admit what you don't, and try to show some love, your kids will respect you.
Just like anyone else.
It's that simple.
deafwhisperer
+1 -0
Chubbied for the love of mankind.
Chubbied for the love of mankind.
mystkmanat
+0 -0
<3
<3
daedala_x
+0 -0
i think basically my kid (if i have one) will be screwed up no matter what i do. i mean i'm pretty bad with children now. can hardly listen to one crying in a restaurant without having baseball bat ideas. and the other day i was discussing a pregnant friend of a friend who is having a boy, and the first thing that came into my mind was "what if i have a boy, and i am changing his diaper, and i am all alone.. i could totally put his thing in my mouth." in high school i was a private piano tutor to a 7 year old girl and she just had the smoothest skin, the prettiest legs and lips.. sometimes i'd drive her to ballet class afterwards and i'd help her put on her leotard...
not sexy, not cool, not a good mother.
i think basically my kid (if i have one) will be screwed up no matter what i do. i mean i'm pretty bad with children now. can hardly listen to one crying in a restaurant without having baseball bat ideas. and the other day i was discussing a pregnant friend of a friend who is having a boy, and the first thing that came into my mind was "what if i have a boy, and i am changing his diaper, and i am all alone.. i could totally put his thing in my mouth." in high school i was a private piano tutor to a 7 year old girl and she just had the smoothest skin, the prettiest legs and lips.. sometimes i'd drive her to ballet class afterwards and i'd help her put on her leotard...
not sexy, not cool, not a good mother.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
This is pretty drastic action to try and stop the men of AssetBar from thinking of you as a sexy girl, Daedala. Worse than that, it's probably just making some of them more interested.
Not me, though. I'm lighting my anti-pedo torch as we parlons.
This is pretty drastic action to try and stop the men of AssetBar from thinking of you as a sexy girl, Daedala. Worse than that, it's probably just making some of them more interested.
Not me, though. I'm lighting my anti-pedo torch as we parlons.
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
I wear diapers and have a pee pee
come see me
dae dae
I wear diapers and have a pee pee
come see me
dae dae
falseprophet
+1 -0
Quote:
Then the baby is the winner.
Quote:
what if i have a boy, and i am changing his diaper, and i am all alone.. i could totally put his thing in my mouth
Then the baby is the winner.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
This goes very oddly with the 'in your own words' description on your profile. You basically have written half the script of a standard hentai movie right there
This goes very oddly with the 'in your own words' description on your profile. You basically have written half the script of a standard hentai movie right there
daedala_x
+0 -0
have you ever SEEN a teenage boy? all having pimples and conspicuously trying to skateboard. all wearing clothes from T.J.Maxx that their mom picked up on 75% off clearance. all buying their first stick of deodorant to cover up sweat that smells like balls and mountain dew. no, i do not want any part of that.
a daughter, on the other hand, will be kept in captivity until she is of marriageable age. she will then be wed to ME. she will have the same sex hangups as i do and she will feel just as shameful when wearing low cut shirts. i'll die before i let my daughter show up on jj.am.
have you ever SEEN a teenage boy? all having pimples and conspicuously trying to skateboard. all wearing clothes from T.J.Maxx that their mom picked up on 75% off clearance. all buying their first stick of deodorant to cover up sweat that smells like balls and mountain dew. no, i do not want any part of that.
a daughter, on the other hand, will be kept in captivity until she is of marriageable age. she will then be wed to ME. she will have the same sex hangups as i do and she will feel just as shameful when wearing low cut shirts. i'll die before i let my daughter show up on jj.am.
everything
+0 -0
I... what...? at that rate why not just stuff some straw in a pair of overalls ,
I... what...? at that rate why not just stuff some straw in a pair of overalls ,
belgand
+0 -0
You feel shameful wearing a low cut shirt, but you will go out in public (and post pictures online to a group that will clearly idolize you for it) wearing a tinfoil bra?
Having nice breasts is something to be proud of. Wearing your shirts cut as low as you like and revel in them. Flaunt ye rosebuds while ye may.
You feel shameful wearing a low cut shirt, but you will go out in public (and post pictures online to a group that will clearly idolize you for it) wearing a tinfoil bra?
Having nice breasts is something to be proud of. Wearing your shirts cut as low as you like and revel in them. Flaunt ye rosebuds while ye may.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Fuck, don't even wear a shirt if you don't want to, I heard the cops won't even stop you if your rack is nice enough. Proof ex facto!
Fuck, don't even wear a shirt if you don't want to, I heard the cops won't even stop you if your rack is nice enough. Proof ex facto!
belgand
+0 -0
I recall reading that it is actually entirely legal for a lady to go topless in New York City due to a legal precedent. It is, of course, one of those things that most of the police are not entirely up on, but it is basically a thing.
I recall reading that it is actually entirely legal for a lady to go topless in New York City due to a legal precedent. It is, of course, one of those things that most of the police are not entirely up on, but it is basically a thing.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
You remember reading that in Octopus Pie.
You remember reading that in Octopus Pie.
belgand
+0 -0
I've never read Octopus Pie so, no. If pressed I'd hazard a guess that it was The Straight Dope, but that really doesn't sound correct.
I'm also deeply ashamed that it is somehow not also legal in SF. I mean, we have plenty of other events where public nudity and/or exhibitionistic kinky public sex is tolerated, but we're still not OK with nipples? I mean, we only have one nude beach in the city limits and it's always cold and you can't swim.
I've never read Octopus Pie so, no. If pressed I'd hazard a guess that it was The Straight Dope, but that really doesn't sound correct.
I'm also deeply ashamed that it is somehow not also legal in SF. I mean, we have plenty of other events where public nudity and/or exhibitionistic kinky public sex is tolerated, but we're still not OK with nipples? I mean, we only have one nude beach in the city limits and it's always cold and you can't swim.
bixschmix
+0 -0
No, it's true. There are sometimes topless buskers,
(which is a fantastic phrase).
No, it's true. There are sometimes topless buskers,
(which is a fantastic phrase).
wozzeck
+0 -0
You would be very popular as a teacher, however.
You would be very popular as a teacher, however.
history
+0 -0
Alternatively you could go for outdoor range coolness. Squint excessively until you have major crows feet, speak in just verbs, and generally move very slowly. This will require an intimate knowledge of birthing cattle, which may be an insurmountable obstacle. It may also be the reason that you should only speak in verbs.
Alternatively you could go for outdoor range coolness. Squint excessively until you have major crows feet, speak in just verbs, and generally move very slowly. This will require an intimate knowledge of birthing cattle, which may be an insurmountable obstacle. It may also be the reason that you should only speak in verbs.
tripleg
+0 -0
i figure the best approach to ramses is to view ramses the way christopher titus talks about his father, with an equal mixture of fear, awe, and annoyance
i figure the best approach to ramses is to view ramses the way christopher titus talks about his father, with an equal mixture of fear, awe, and annoyance
hamscout
+0 -0
Although, Ramses would not get caught speeding on a traffic ticket cam with a floozy's head in his lap.
Although, Ramses would not get caught speeding on a traffic ticket cam with a floozy's head in his lap.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Any badass worth a damn can't not be a dick in most ways. You think badasses kiss booboos and pet puppy dogs, boy?
Any badass worth a damn can't not be a dick in most ways. You think badasses kiss booboos and pet puppy dogs, boy?
telescreen
+6 -0
You know what's not badass? Abandoning your child so he gets hell of masculinity issues to compensate.
You know what's not badass? Abandoning your child so he gets hell of masculinity issues to compensate.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Are you morally judging a cartoon cat? SHAME.
Are you morally judging a cartoon cat? SHAME.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
It is what Tom cats do. It is not what humans are supposed to do normally.....although there are enough scenarios where the child is way better off that the paternal gene-donor, being a complete loser- is not in his/her environment...to further deform already bent genes.
Just sayin'-
It is what Tom cats do. It is not what humans are supposed to do normally.....although there are enough scenarios where the child is way better off that the paternal gene-donor, being a complete loser- is not in his/her environment...to further deform already bent genes.
Just sayin'-
echidnaboy
+8 -0
Quote:
[IMGS OFF]
Quote:
Ramses, like Wild Bill, is gonna get shot in the back by a coward. That ain't so badass.
[IMGS OFF]
octafish
+0 -0
Echidnaboy will you marry me?
Echidnaboy will you marry me?
belgand
+3 -0
I feel like the comic could have been vastly improved by just cutting it down a bit. Think about it. Take panel seven "It's like finally gettin' to hang out with him" out and instead replace it with the final panel. For the final panel cut everything after "I wish he'd ever come to a parent-teacher conference..."
Instead of a long, ramble from Ramses we have a brief window to him. Ray observes his father and, in the end as much as he wishes he could know someone this bad-ass what he really wants is to have simply known him as a father. Bonus chubs for ending with one last wistful sip. He knows it will never be and could never have been. Nothing needs to be said.
I feel like the comic could have been vastly improved by just cutting it down a bit. Think about it. Take panel seven "It's like finally gettin' to hang out with him" out and instead replace it with the final panel. For the final panel cut everything after "I wish he'd ever come to a parent-teacher conference..."
Instead of a long, ramble from Ramses we have a brief window to him. Ray observes his father and, in the end as much as he wishes he could know someone this bad-ass what he really wants is to have simply known him as a father. Bonus chubs for ending with one last wistful sip. He knows it will never be and could never have been. Nothing needs to be said.
belgand
+5 -0
Basically, this is what I am saying:
[IMGS OFF]
Basically, this is what I am saying:
[IMGS OFF]
dangelder
+8 -1
Remember the Great Outdoor Fight arc? That was too long too.
[IMGS OFF]
Remember the Great Outdoor Fight arc? That was too long too.
[IMGS OFF]
hamscout
+7 -0
I think what we're trying to say here is:
[IMGS OFF]
I think what we're trying to say here is:
[IMGS OFF]
usversusthem
+2 -1
It is a perfect... webcomic!
It is a perfect... webcomic!
wozzeck
+1 -0
In 2052 Phillipe transfers his consciousness to a robot body, and holds a funeral for his meat-body.
In 2052 Phillipe transfers his consciousness to a robot body, and holds a funeral for his meat-body.
helter
+8 -0
Robo-Phillipe is 101.
Robo-Phillipe is 101.
kickstart
+0 -0
Being one of the 10 types of people, I salute you.
Being one of the 10 types of people, I salute you.
deadpool
+0 -0
Dude I actually totally and completely agree with you.
I doubt anyone here knows of Ctrl Alt Del but it is a terrible comic. It is only four panels, and still manages to be entirely too wordy. So some people thought "Hey what happened if you cut out the middle two panels?" and it actually turned out to be semi-bearable most of the time. And it made more sense.
Dude I actually totally and completely agree with you.
I doubt anyone here knows of Ctrl Alt Del but it is a terrible comic. It is only four panels, and still manages to be entirely too wordy. So some people thought "Hey what happened if you cut out the middle two panels?" and it actually turned out to be semi-bearable most of the time. And it made more sense.
belgand
+0 -0
Well, it's not just too wordy (and we've been getting a lot of wordy, cut-and-paste jobs lately), but that the middle adds nothing and kills the momentum and feel of the piece.
Here it is Ray answering, he hears the first bit which tells him it is his father, he listens for a brief moment which sets the scene entirely and shows us his longing to spend time with his absent father, it then ends with him musing about not only how much he looks up to his father (in the guise of a man who is a bad-ass), but more how much he simply wishes he had been a father.
The line about him destroying men also is allowed to take on a double-meaning. Who is the man he has really destroyed: the one on the ground or the one on the phone?
Well, it's not just too wordy (and we've been getting a lot of wordy, cut-and-paste jobs lately), but that the middle adds nothing and kills the momentum and feel of the piece.
Here it is Ray answering, he hears the first bit which tells him it is his father, he listens for a brief moment which sets the scene entirely and shows us his longing to spend time with his absent father, it then ends with him musing about not only how much he looks up to his father (in the guise of a man who is a bad-ass), but more how much he simply wishes he had been a father.
The line about him destroying men also is allowed to take on a double-meaning. Who is the man he has really destroyed: the one on the ground or the one on the phone?
whiteturtle
+1 -0
I think your strip is a boring one. Ray is out of character. This could be any character receiving a phone call. Nothing special is going on. The whole coffin thing is a joke, plus what Ramses does at school is a joke. All that you have in yours is character development that has already happened. Snoozers.
I think your strip is a boring one. Ray is out of character. This could be any character receiving a phone call. Nothing special is going on. The whole coffin thing is a joke, plus what Ramses does at school is a joke. All that you have in yours is character development that has already happened. Snoozers.
connormc
+2 -0
dude, name one other character who gets an unknown number and immediately figures "this phone call could be the bomb". ain't no man ALIVE as ridiculously optimistic as raymond smuckles. no sir.
dude, name one other character who gets an unknown number and immediately figures "this phone call could be the bomb". ain't no man ALIVE as ridiculously optimistic as raymond smuckles. no sir.
belgand
+1 -0
Since when has Achewood been a comic about jokes that just keep going on and on and on? It's about comics that don't need jokes or punchlines. It's about characters.
Since when has Achewood been a comic about jokes that just keep going on and on and on? It's about comics that don't need jokes or punchlines. It's about characters.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
And we get more insight into Ramses' character with that outer monologue. Hilarious insight. No?
And we get more insight into Ramses' character with that outer monologue. Hilarious insight. No?
belgand
+1 -0
It didn't feel like we did. It felt more like he just keep rambling on and on with Onstad trying more to write in the style of Ramses (much like many of us so often try to capture the style of characters) than something he would actually say.
I also, frankly, don't see what was supposedly funny in any of it.
It didn't feel like we did. It felt more like he just keep rambling on and on with Onstad trying more to write in the style of Ramses (much like many of us so often try to capture the style of characters) than something he would actually say.
I also, frankly, don't see what was supposedly funny in any of it.
nice-on-water
+1 -0
You know, maybe it wasn't meant to be funny. Maybe this is indeed the portrait of a madman, the ramblings of a delusional has-been. Maybe there never was any cop. Maybe it's all a show to impress Ray. MAYBE THE ENTIRE CHARACTER IS DEAD AND RAY CAN SEE DEAD PEOPLE.
You know, maybe it wasn't meant to be funny. Maybe this is indeed the portrait of a madman, the ramblings of a delusional has-been. Maybe there never was any cop. Maybe it's all a show to impress Ray. MAYBE THE ENTIRE CHARACTER IS DEAD AND RAY CAN SEE DEAD PEOPLE.
nice-on-water
+3 -0
MAYBE.
MAYBE.
stereo
+0 -0
Maybe he can hear dead people.
Who wants to do an archive trawl?
Maybe he can hear dead people.
Who wants to do an archive trawl?
belgand
+0 -0
I never said it had to be funny, but you were all goin' on about how damn funny it all was and I just gotta say, no sir, I don't like it.
I never said it had to be funny, but you were all goin' on about how damn funny it all was and I just gotta say, no sir, I don't like it.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
please tell me "no sir, I don't like it" is a vaguely remembered quote from Ren and Stimpy (i.e. Mr. Horse).
please tell me "no sir, I don't like it" is a vaguely remembered quote from Ren and Stimpy (i.e. Mr. Horse).
belgand
+0 -0
Yes, yes it is. Don't always need to go with the most popular of references. Gotta work with the classics and keep it fresh and suited to the job at hand.
Yes, yes it is. Don't always need to go with the most popular of references. Gotta work with the classics and keep it fresh and suited to the job at hand.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Champion.
Champion.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Okay then.
Okay then.
whiteturtle
+1 -0
But you could just do a panel of ray watching Braveheart with a bong in his hand and that is his. I know these characters, and I want to see what they do, but I want to see them do new things. Ramses being a badass isn't a new thing, but the way in which he does it is a new thing. The whole "declaring god dead" thing fleshes out another layer to Ramses character, plus the fact that he got a take-out calzone. You take those things out and I don't care anymore. Though I do agree that the "It is like hanging out with him" panel is kind of a matter of telling rather than showing. There could be a better panel there, but I don't hate it. But you could go through every comic in the archives and redo it if you wanted to change the pace.
But you could just do a panel of ray watching Braveheart with a bong in his hand and that is his. I know these characters, and I want to see what they do, but I want to see them do new things. Ramses being a badass isn't a new thing, but the way in which he does it is a new thing. The whole "declaring god dead" thing fleshes out another layer to Ramses character, plus the fact that he got a take-out calzone. You take those things out and I don't care anymore. Though I do agree that the "It is like hanging out with him" panel is kind of a matter of telling rather than showing. There could be a better panel there, but I don't hate it. But you could go through every comic in the archives and redo it if you wanted to change the pace.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
"...with a bong in his hand and that is his character."
"...with a bong in his hand and that is his character."
drskradley
+0 -0
Well said, Sir Turtle.
Well said, Sir Turtle.
morypcaina
+0 -0
B^U
B^U
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i kind of liked ctrl alt del at first...but it did start going crap.
i kind of liked ctrl alt del at first...but it did start going crap.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
yep. as sick as it makes me to agree with you, yep. leave it at the ".. in a coffin".
yep. as sick as it makes me to agree with you, yep. leave it at the ".. in a coffin".
telescreen
+4 -0
I think that I disagree with you because I really enjoyed the writing in Ramses's rant. Sometimes when Onstad gets wordy, the idiosyncrasies of his phrasing become a bit top-heavy. But here, he's really grasped the mentality of the character and made a gripping trip into the mind of a borderline fascist.
I think fineoakstructure is right in saying that Onstad is both crafting a legendary status for Ramses while also subverting him. There is some amount of criticism that must come from us for someone who is so self assured of his moral absolutes no matter how much we agree with him.
I think that I disagree with you because I really enjoyed the writing in Ramses's rant. Sometimes when Onstad gets wordy, the idiosyncrasies of his phrasing become a bit top-heavy. But here, he's really grasped the mentality of the character and made a gripping trip into the mind of a borderline fascist.
I think fineoakstructure is right in saying that Onstad is both crafting a legendary status for Ramses while also subverting him. There is some amount of criticism that must come from us for someone who is so self assured of his moral absolutes no matter how much we agree with him.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
anywhere else I was talking about Ramses, just refer to this asset please.
anywhere else I was talking about Ramses, just refer to this asset please.
belgand
+0 -0
The last sentence, however, seemed to imply that he is not aware of how he has done that. It seems to me that we are intended to still find Ramses entirely cool and nothing else, not pick up on the borderline fascism that makes him less awesome.
It ends up feeling almost like self-parody to me.
Plus, well, a lot of recent strips have been going longer and longer and I'm not certain it's always the best approach. Hard and lean tends to have worked best in the past and I think it might be a good time to return to that considering the troubles in regular production we've had (that seem, honestly, to largely be over). Plus it'll likely mean fewer cases where the strip is mainly just cut-and-paste.
The last sentence, however, seemed to imply that he is not aware of how he has done that. It seems to me that we are intended to still find Ramses entirely cool and nothing else, not pick up on the borderline fascism that makes him less awesome.
It ends up feeling almost like self-parody to me.
Plus, well, a lot of recent strips have been going longer and longer and I'm not certain it's always the best approach. Hard and lean tends to have worked best in the past and I think it might be a good time to return to that considering the troubles in regular production we've had (that seem, honestly, to largely be over). Plus it'll likely mean fewer cases where the strip is mainly just cut-and-paste.
telescreen
+0 -0
While I agree with you about the increasing girth of his comics really not amounting to much, I still think that in this case it works. I'll just agree to disagree on that.
HOWEVER, I do think that you underestimate his writing abilities. Just because Ray is too deluded by his admiration to not notice the negative aspects of his father, doesn't mean Onstad is. I would totally expect Ray to not criticize his father. Only time and more Ramses strips will allow further verification of my hypothesis.
While I agree with you about the increasing girth of his comics really not amounting to much, I still think that in this case it works. I'll just agree to disagree on that.
HOWEVER, I do think that you underestimate his writing abilities. Just because Ray is too deluded by his admiration to not notice the negative aspects of his father, doesn't mean Onstad is. I would totally expect Ray to not criticize his father. Only time and more Ramses strips will allow further verification of my hypothesis.
daedala_x
+7 -0
Here's my two cents on this "character development" we're seeing.
In order for a character to be enjoyable, he does not have to be morally compatible with his viewer or his author. He just has to be a consistent and convincing characterization of a type of person that either we know to exist or that we can imagine to exist. So no, Chris clearly does not have to agree with Ramses' views. However , if we consider the fact that comedy has positive literary value to society, then any effort to make an otherwise distasteful act into a humorous one already dampens if not all but eliminates its negative qualities. It used to be that parody and satire were interchangeable terms. But what passes as parody nowadays has none of the Swiftian wit and bite that once was the embodiment of satire.
I mean take a show like Metalocalypse. given the way its characters are portrayed, one might think it's a parody on metal musicians. But I would argue that if it is a parody at all, it is at the same time, and to a greater degree, a homage to the very thing it purports to parody. It's an idealization of that thing, exaggerating all the humorous aspects, be they good or bad, and eliminating all the bad-by-itself, thereby tricking us into believing that those bad traits are not so bad after all.
The point being that the motive to humorize something in such a way comes from an admiration of it, or at least certain aspects of it, which become the focus of the humorization. That's pretty much what Chris is doing with Ramses here, and what he's been doing with Ray all along. I'm pretty sure Ray's relationship with his dad simply provided a template within which Chris could unload his dialogue of badassery that he daydreams about uttering in real life just all the time. Ramses had to make a reappearance after Chris realized that a talking stomach just couldn't kick ass such as a grown man does. Grown men do not pick on depressed cats named Roast Beef. That is low .
Here's my two cents on this "character development" we're seeing.
In order for a character to be enjoyable, he does not have to be morally compatible with his viewer or his author. He just has to be a consistent and convincing characterization of a type of person that either we know to exist or that we can imagine to exist. So no, Chris clearly does not have to agree with Ramses' views. However , if we consider the fact that comedy has positive literary value to society, then any effort to make an otherwise distasteful act into a humorous one already dampens if not all but eliminates its negative qualities. It used to be that parody and satire were interchangeable terms. But what passes as parody nowadays has none of the Swiftian wit and bite that once was the embodiment of satire.
I mean take a show like Metalocalypse. given the way its characters are portrayed, one might think it's a parody on metal musicians. But I would argue that if it is a parody at all, it is at the same time, and to a greater degree, a homage to the very thing it purports to parody. It's an idealization of that thing, exaggerating all the humorous aspects, be they good or bad, and eliminating all the bad-by-itself, thereby tricking us into believing that those bad traits are not so bad after all.
The point being that the motive to humorize something in such a way comes from an admiration of it, or at least certain aspects of it, which become the focus of the humorization. That's pretty much what Chris is doing with Ramses here, and what he's been doing with Ray all along. I'm pretty sure Ray's relationship with his dad simply provided a template within which Chris could unload his dialogue of badassery that he daydreams about uttering in real life just all the time. Ramses had to make a reappearance after Chris realized that a talking stomach just couldn't kick ass such as a grown man does. Grown men do not pick on depressed cats named Roast Beef. That is low .
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Thank you for that asset.
Thank you for that asset.
telescreen
+0 -0
This is actually interesting. It really is true that a lot of things that we call satire nowadays is actually a strange amalgam of homage and parody. I don't know if it's a bad thing, but definitely a good point.
This is actually interesting. It really is true that a lot of things that we call satire nowadays is actually a strange amalgam of homage and parody. I don't know if it's a bad thing, but definitely a good point.
mattylite
+0 -0
Ya I have talked about this with my friends a lot. Man, you know, we should invent a word for the combination of homage and parody. Who knows Greek or Latin? We gotta make it sound like it'll make us sound like we're really smart.
Ya I have talked about this with my friends a lot. Man, you know, we should invent a word for the combination of homage and parody. Who knows Greek or Latin? We gotta make it sound like it'll make us sound like we're really smart.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Some folks at some point in the last century, after a mustachioed guy in the previous century, wrote about parody being homage, but they forgot to call it differantody or something.
Some folks at some point in the last century, after a mustachioed guy in the previous century, wrote about parody being homage, but they forgot to call it differantody or something.
mattylite
+0 -0
Who was it? Who was the mustachioed guy?
Who was it? Who was the mustachioed guy?
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
He was all the names in history?
Sorry for being cryptic, it's them rubbing off. Nietzsche's anti-Socratic thing is based in part on the original V. copy deal that's a big thing for Plato. In the later Nietzsche, before even the eternal return episode, there's mentions of parody galore, seen as "life" and the "laughter of the gods." To "post-modernists" of the "French thought" cabal of the 60's and 70's, it only makes sense that all facts being ultimately interpretations, all representations are actually a parody, a repetition/rehearsal, or a simulacrum - depending if you ask Lyotard, Deleuze, Klossowski or Derrida. As representations, eulogies and homages necessarily deride identity and the seriousness of reverence. In turn, this derision made in a world of illusions and copies only is the most sincere form of reverence.
That, or I just wanted to sound like I'm really smart.
He was all the names in history?
Sorry for being cryptic, it's them rubbing off. Nietzsche's anti-Socratic thing is based in part on the original V. copy deal that's a big thing for Plato. In the later Nietzsche, before even the eternal return episode, there's mentions of parody galore, seen as "life" and the "laughter of the gods." To "post-modernists" of the "French thought" cabal of the 60's and 70's, it only makes sense that all facts being ultimately interpretations, all representations are actually a parody, a repetition/rehearsal, or a simulacrum - depending if you ask Lyotard, Deleuze, Klossowski or Derrida. As representations, eulogies and homages necessarily deride identity and the seriousness of reverence. In turn, this derision made in a world of illusions and copies only is the most sincere form of reverence.
That, or I just wanted to sound like I'm really smart.
telescreen
+0 -0
Man, bro, I didn't catch much of that Philosophizing, but I did snag on that damn word post-modern. (or is it two?)
I was just talkin to some of my friends about how everything seems to be post-modern nowadays. Perhaps the "homajady" we have mentioned is a symptom of this.
Anybody else just all bombarded by post-modernism in these trying times? Not necessarily a bad thing, but just something I notice now and again.
Man, bro, I didn't catch much of that Philosophizing, but I did snag on that damn word post-modern. (or is it two?)
I was just talkin to some of my friends about how everything seems to be post-modern nowadays. Perhaps the "homajady" we have mentioned is a symptom of this.
Anybody else just all bombarded by post-modernism in these trying times? Not necessarily a bad thing, but just something I notice now and again.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yeah, you are right.
Same with it not being a bad thing, I'd rather read a million po-mo ripoff novels than fuckin' Twilight .
Yeah, you are right.
Same with it not being a bad thing, I'd rather read a million po-mo ripoff novels than fuckin' Twilight .
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
lol wut
lol wut
mattylite
+0 -0
Falseprophet, where are you? We need John Cusack to be right here holding up that "No Po-Mo" sign.
Falseprophet, where are you? We need John Cusack to be right here holding up that "No Po-Mo" sign.
tripleg
+0 -0
it's in the zeitgeist man, it's a natural extension of living in a media saturated environment. just think of how video and audio recording completely change the nature of how we "remember" as a culture: in days of yore, you had to depend on the (much less reliable) recollection of your elders to know what had happened in days past. now it's all on youtube. i feel like i should make an ironic reference now, but will abstain.
it's in the zeitgeist man, it's a natural extension of living in a media saturated environment. just think of how video and audio recording completely change the nature of how we "remember" as a culture: in days of yore, you had to depend on the (much less reliable) recollection of your elders to know what had happened in days past. now it's all on youtube. i feel like i should make an ironic reference now, but will abstain.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
My feeling is that people have been relying on books for a time, and that it's less the zeitgeist now than good old coming of drinking age. I mean, people have been talking about media saturation and post-modernity since the at least the beginning of the 20th century and the whole concept was mainstream enough to hit costumed comics in the mid eighties.
If anything, in this age when we are able to know a lot about it, we assume more of the past than we actually know. Somewhere below, someone references Everything is everything as lyrics from a song. Everyone likes to think their generation invented irony and parody, but things like we're all holograms have popped up before (all idealisms and immaterialisms), and may again.
My feeling is that people have been relying on books for a time, and that it's less the zeitgeist now than good old coming of drinking age. I mean, people have been talking about media saturation and post-modernity since the at least the beginning of the 20th century and the whole concept was mainstream enough to hit costumed comics in the mid eighties.
If anything, in this age when we are able to know a lot about it, we assume more of the past than we actually know. Somewhere below, someone references Everything is everything as lyrics from a song. Everyone likes to think their generation invented irony and parody, but things like we're all holograms have popped up before (all idealisms and immaterialisms), and may again.
telescreen
+0 -0
As tripleg said, people used to have only what human hands, minds and mouths could re-create to envision the past. Now we live with the collective memory of the human race at our fingertips. How can we help but be post-modern when past and present, sacred and profane constantly exist all around us in a visible way? It was bad enough when you had to just imagine that time was just a function of a dumb monkey brain, but when you can almost see it?
As tripleg said, people used to have only what human hands, minds and mouths could re-create to envision the past. Now we live with the collective memory of the human race at our fingertips. How can we help but be post-modern when past and present, sacred and profane constantly exist all around us in a visible way? It was bad enough when you had to just imagine that time was just a function of a dumb monkey brain, but when you can almost see it?
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Quote:
What's really postmodern is that you may well be quoting word for grunt the guy whose second cousin did the first wall paintings in a cave of Western Europe.
Quote:
Now we live with the collective memory of the human race at our fingertips. How can we help but be post-modern when past and present, sacred and profane constantly exist all around us in a visible way? It was bad enough when you had to just imagine that time was just a function of a dumb monkey brain, but when you can almost see it?
What's really postmodern is that you may well be quoting word for grunt the guy whose second cousin did the first wall paintings in a cave of Western Europe.
tripleg
+0 -0
yes totally, because all cave people all around the world had nigh-instantaneous access to those paintings and then photoshopped them into oblivion, reposting them on cave walls using neanderthal lolspeak. yes.
yes totally, because all cave people all around the world had nigh-instantaneous access to those paintings and then photoshopped them into oblivion, reposting them on cave walls using neanderthal lolspeak. yes.
belgand
+0 -0
"Back in my day if we wanted to know something we either heard it from our parents or the village elder, but now we've got these damn bards traveling around all over the place. I swear almost any night I can go down to the pub and hear an epic recounting of days of yore, not just the vague recollection that one time Odysseus passed through town and he was like, y'know, kind of a big deal and did some cool stuff. Now I can't help but be bombarded with all of Herakles labors in perfect order (not to mention rhythm and meter) like they just happened yesterday. It really changes your perceptions."
I agree with you guys, but, this is basically always the nature of things. Every generation keeps thinking these same exact thoughts. You want to think that this wasn't the same deal after the widespread development of movable type? Radio? C'mon... it's nothing new and it never will be.
"Back in my day if we wanted to know something we either heard it from our parents or the village elder, but now we've got these damn bards traveling around all over the place. I swear almost any night I can go down to the pub and hear an epic recounting of days of yore, not just the vague recollection that one time Odysseus passed through town and he was like, y'know, kind of a big deal and did some cool stuff. Now I can't help but be bombarded with all of Herakles labors in perfect order (not to mention rhythm and meter) like they just happened yesterday. It really changes your perceptions."
I agree with you guys, but, this is basically always the nature of things. Every generation keeps thinking these same exact thoughts. You want to think that this wasn't the same deal after the widespread development of movable type? Radio? C'mon... it's nothing new and it never will be.
telescreen
+0 -0
I wasn't making a value judgment on our increasing access to information. I was just making an observation. It's probably a good thing. I just think that that contributes to this sense of postmodernism that pervades a lot of our culture, the pastiche, the bringing together of past and present, sacred and profane. Even my clothes are postmodern.
Also, I say that despite the fact that this is the nature of things, I am lumping together all mass media when I say we have instant access to so much stuff. But in particular, the internet has really changed the damn game. There is a huge difference between the move from movable type to radio in terms of spreading ideas, and the move from radio/tv to internet. If I had a dispute about a certain fact with a friend and I wanted to verify who is right, a bard, or TV was not instantly at my beck and call to give me the answer. It meant a trip to the library or my home encyclopedia to give the answer. Now, information to verify this (good or bad) is right under my nose at all times. My fucking cell phone holds more information than an entire library just a couple decades ago.
I don't want to turn this into a debate about whether this is a good or bad thing. It's probably good. I just want to make a distinction between our times, and other times in which we've experienced increasing availability of information.
I wasn't making a value judgment on our increasing access to information. I was just making an observation. It's probably a good thing. I just think that that contributes to this sense of postmodernism that pervades a lot of our culture, the pastiche, the bringing together of past and present, sacred and profane. Even my clothes are postmodern.
Also, I say that despite the fact that this is the nature of things, I am lumping together all mass media when I say we have instant access to so much stuff. But in particular, the internet has really changed the damn game. There is a huge difference between the move from movable type to radio in terms of spreading ideas, and the move from radio/tv to internet. If I had a dispute about a certain fact with a friend and I wanted to verify who is right, a bard, or TV was not instantly at my beck and call to give me the answer. It meant a trip to the library or my home encyclopedia to give the answer. Now, information to verify this (good or bad) is right under my nose at all times. My fucking cell phone holds more information than an entire library just a couple decades ago.
I don't want to turn this into a debate about whether this is a good or bad thing. It's probably good. I just want to make a distinction between our times, and other times in which we've experienced increasing availability of information.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Ah, sorry, I thought you meant post-modern.
'Cause there ought to be a word to describe how things have changed (and I'd say there are new things around en masse), even though it's obvious we don't really have nigh-instantaneous access to anything that matters. Sadly, that word is not spamming the internet yet, so we have to either wait or go to a lecture.
(Am I being mean because I'm waiting for the new strip? Maybe.)
Ah, sorry, I thought you meant post-modern.
'Cause there ought to be a word to describe how things have changed (and I'd say there are new things around en masse), even though it's obvious we don't really have nigh-instantaneous access to anything that matters. Sadly, that word is not spamming the internet yet, so we have to either wait or go to a lecture.
(Am I being mean because I'm waiting for the new strip? Maybe.)
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
It's confusing how this post is placed. Also, one new thing coming with the internet is internet debating.
Sorry.
It's confusing how this post is placed. Also, one new thing coming with the internet is internet debating.
Sorry.
tripleg
+0 -0
yes
yes
falseprophet
+2 -0
[IMGS OFF]
Back by (not all that) popular demand.
[IMGS OFF]
Back by (not all that) popular demand.
telescreen
+0 -0
And no one even agrees with it. Shiiiiit....
And no one even agrees with it. Shiiiiit....
mattylite
+0 -0
Aw shit, man, add to that this popular science thing goin' around that we might all be holgrams or whatever and even the original shit that got accidentally parodied just by being represented is not even really what it is. OOOHHHHH SHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT
Aw shit, man, add to that this popular science thing goin' around that we might all be holgrams or whatever and even the original shit that got accidentally parodied just by being represented is not even really what it is. OOOHHHHH SHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT
whiteturtle
+0 -0
Can someone give me a quick run down of the "we are all holograms" thing? I've heard it mentioned but haven't been able to find a good explanation.
Also, fattybeaver, your avatariconography is going to get me fired.
Can someone give me a quick run down of the "we are all holograms" thing? I've heard it mentioned but haven't been able to find a good explanation.
Also, fattybeaver, your avatariconography is going to get me fired.
fattybeaver
+0 -0
This comment would be vastly improved if it cut out everything except the first and last sentence.
This comment would be vastly improved if it cut out everything except the first and last sentence.
fermatprime
+0 -0
This comment would be vastly improved if it cut out everything except the avatar.
This comment would be vastly improved if it cut out everything except the avatar.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
I would even cut certain things out of the avatar
I would even cut certain things out of the avatar
kickstart
+0 -0
Cut a couplea strings, right old boy?
Cut a couplea strings, right old boy?
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I don't see any strings. I just see a quivering piece of screaming glass with a skinny middle where the smells come from
I don't see any strings. I just see a quivering piece of screaming glass with a skinny middle where the smells come from
mattylite
+0 -0
Who is it who has the Bill Hicks avatariconitard? He should get in here and do that ad exec bit on jigglin' titties I heard him do one time.
Who is it who has the Bill Hicks avatariconitard? He should get in here and do that ad exec bit on jigglin' titties I heard him do one time.
ford
+1 -0
goddammit how do i not know that bit by heart, now i have to go listen to the entire library. let me know if this does anything for you:
She go to that like a duck to water, HOW HOW HOW
goddammit how do i not know that bit by heart, now i have to go listen to the entire library. let me know if this does anything for you:
She go to that like a duck to water, HOW HOW HOW
mattylite
+0 -0
Pro-tip: imagine the avatar saying "HOW HOW HOW".
Pro-tip: imagine the avatar saying "HOW HOW HOW".
autrepoupee
+2 -0
oh my god ray, you NEVER, EVER answer an "unknown" number.
Honestly Assetbar, have you ever gotten a bomb phone call that was just totally "Unknown"? Either debt-collectors, sexual predators, the cops, or an accidental dial. If it is anything important, they'll leave a message; hopefully with a real phone number attached to it. Man, it makes me so mad when people think they have to answer the phone; you don't owe anybody anything!
oh my god ray, you NEVER, EVER answer an "unknown" number.
Honestly Assetbar, have you ever gotten a bomb phone call that was just totally "Unknown"? Either debt-collectors, sexual predators, the cops, or an accidental dial. If it is anything important, they'll leave a message; hopefully with a real phone number attached to it. Man, it makes me so mad when people think they have to answer the phone; you don't owe anybody anything!
belgand
+0 -0
I've had friends that sometimes had issues with blocked numbers so yeah, I often got great calls to go do things right then that I would have otherwise missed.
I've had friends that sometimes had issues with blocked numbers so yeah, I often got great calls to go do things right then that I would have otherwise missed.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
As someone who works for a Welfare Department, people are not often looking forward to my call. I always dial with a blocked number, because often enough, after that call they're desperate to so readily be able to speak to someone.
As someone who works for a Welfare Department, people are not often looking forward to my call. I always dial with a blocked number, because often enough, after that call they're desperate to so readily be able to speak to someone.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
they're desperate to so readily be able to speak to someone.
someone call the fucking syntax police and have this poor sentence drowned.
they're desperate to so readily be able to speak to someone.
someone call the fucking syntax police and have this poor sentence drowned.
woodenteeth
+2 -0
The Syntax Police have a very sad job. The next of kin visit is particularly awkward.
The Syntax Police have a very sad job. The next of kin visit is particularly awkward.
irondave
+5 -0
"We're sorry sir, but there's been a very serious pile-up, and your meaning didn't make it through."
"We're sorry sir, but there's been a very serious pile-up, and your meaning didn't make it through."
wozzeck
+0 -0
For more than a year I have received phone calls from an old woman who believed I was some female relative of hers.
Unfortunately, she appears to be deaf.
For more than a year I have received phone calls from an old woman who believed I was some female relative of hers.
Unfortunately, she appears to be deaf.
irondave
+0 -0
Right after I moved and changed numbers I got a voice message from what I took to be a very irate black lady who was certain I had taken her shoes. She emphatically meant to have her shoes back.
I so wished I could have downloaded that message.
Right after I moved and changed numbers I got a voice message from what I took to be a very irate black lady who was certain I had taken her shoes. She emphatically meant to have her shoes back.
I so wished I could have downloaded that message.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Both of you have haunted phones. Haunted by souls still lost, but lonely and overwhemlming unambitious.
Both of you have haunted phones. Haunted by souls still lost, but lonely and overwhemlming unambitious.
wozzeck
+0 -0
My phone is haunted by an old woman whose relatives dislike her so much that a year and a half's worth of undelivered messages have not been counted as something worth investigating. Afraid to ruin a good thing, most likely.
My phone is haunted by an old woman whose relatives dislike her so much that a year and a half's worth of undelivered messages have not been counted as something worth investigating. Afraid to ruin a good thing, most likely.
daidai
+0 -0
Or she is ghost writer, and you are not enough of a curious early-90's preteen to help solve the mystery.
where is your inner child
Or she is ghost writer, and you are not enough of a curious early-90's preteen to help solve the mystery.
where is your inner child
wozzeck
+0 -0
It is at the bottom of a well, crying out for love lost.
It is at the bottom of a well, crying out for love lost.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Hey, I always dial from a blocked number...
Hey, I always dial from a blocked number...
kickstart
+0 -0
Remember when we used to make jokes about you have people chained up in your basement? Let's- let's do that again.
Remember when we used to make jokes about you have people chained up in your basement? Let's- let's do that again.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
I would, but it's been done. I didn't even invent that idea. I was only moderately creepy until loneal claimed I had kidnapped her. Worst I did back then was watch women sleep without them knowing. I've been meaning to do something with the persona sometime, but creepin ain't easy
I would, but it's been done. I didn't even invent that idea. I was only moderately creepy until loneal claimed I had kidnapped her. Worst I did back then was watch women sleep without them knowing. I've been meaning to do something with the persona sometime, but creepin ain't easy
kickstart
+0 -0
Hm, perhaps you could put me in a box and mail me to Peru.
Hm, perhaps you could put me in a box and mail me to Peru.
stereo
+0 -0
It's only creepy if you go to Darkest Peru.
It's only creepy if you go to Darkest Peru.
belgand
+0 -0
I can't do that. I wake up in the night or such and look at my girlfriend asleep and it just makes me think that she looks dead. That is how she would look if she was dead.
The whole thing about someone dead looking like they're just sleeping has whipped back on me and it now makes me think asleep people look dead. I do not want this to be the way. Then again sleep always reminds me of death. I really don't like this. I don't like sleeping at all.
I can't do that. I wake up in the night or such and look at my girlfriend asleep and it just makes me think that she looks dead. That is how she would look if she was dead.
The whole thing about someone dead looking like they're just sleeping has whipped back on me and it now makes me think asleep people look dead. I do not want this to be the way. Then again sleep always reminds me of death. I really don't like this. I don't like sleeping at all.
notcool
+0 -0
Asleep people look asleep. Dead people look dead.
Trust me, you'll know.
Asleep people look asleep. Dead people look dead.
Trust me, you'll know.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Your online character is very complete. I enjoy it.
Your online character is very complete. I enjoy it.
belgand
+0 -0
I wish I was just playing a part. Thankfully most of my problems don't interfere with my daily life.
I did, however, get so freaked out by rain while I was trying to sleep the other night that I had to get up, get some water, and make a serious effort to calm down. It was just... it's so astoundingly weird, but we just take it for granted because we're used to it. That doesn't make it any less weird. If anything contemplating the universe and reality just makes things even more weird and far worse.
Sometimes I worry that my grasp of reality is shaky and I might be losing it, but really that's not the problem. It's more that I acknowledge reality, but can't accept it. The terror of existing vs. the horror of non-being.
As I said, though, this rarely impacts my daily life much except late at night when I'm left alone with my thoughts.
I wish I was just playing a part. Thankfully most of my problems don't interfere with my daily life.
I did, however, get so freaked out by rain while I was trying to sleep the other night that I had to get up, get some water, and make a serious effort to calm down. It was just... it's so astoundingly weird, but we just take it for granted because we're used to it. That doesn't make it any less weird. If anything contemplating the universe and reality just makes things even more weird and far worse.
Sometimes I worry that my grasp of reality is shaky and I might be losing it, but really that's not the problem. It's more that I acknowledge reality, but can't accept it. The terror of existing vs. the horror of non-being.
As I said, though, this rarely impacts my daily life much except late at night when I'm left alone with my thoughts.
everything
+0 -0
that doesn't sound good...
that doesn't sound good...
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Don't worry, little Belgand.
The badass who has problems with those issues is not the true badass.
Therefore, don't worry about it.
Don't worry, little Belgand.
The badass who has problems with those issues is not the true badass.
Therefore, don't worry about it.
hausea
+2 -2
Man, after reading this strip I have got to share some anecdotal evidence of how completely badass this fictional cat is.
Ramses has read the Bible enough to have sections of it memorized, I bet. He is behavior is not necessarily exemplary of a God-fearing man but he is old school. He's not just an angry dude, he is filled with Righteous Indignation and he will beat your ass.
The dude has got RESPECT. Maybe this idea doesn't sit too well with you internet atheists but what I'm trying to say is that Ramses Luther Smuckles knows when words have power, and he doesn't dismiss them just because he disagrees.
Man, after reading this strip I have got to share some anecdotal evidence of how completely badass this fictional cat is.
Ramses has read the Bible enough to have sections of it memorized, I bet. He is behavior is not necessarily exemplary of a God-fearing man but he is old school. He's not just an angry dude, he is filled with Righteous Indignation and he will beat your ass.
The dude has got RESPECT. Maybe this idea doesn't sit too well with you internet atheists but what I'm trying to say is that Ramses Luther Smuckles knows when words have power, and he doesn't dismiss them just because he disagrees.
hausea
+0 -0
And to the people who inevitably lame me because I went off on this drooling tangent or they have a bone to pick, I just want to say that I really like Achewood. The dialogue is worth reading every time, it's not just a punchline, and yeah Ramses L. Smuckles is a violent crotchety old man with strong outdated opinions but it would really make me sad if Achewood stopped having characters that I could really believe in.
Even if they are talking cats.
And to the people who inevitably lame me because I went off on this drooling tangent or they have a bone to pick, I just want to say that I really like Achewood. The dialogue is worth reading every time, it's not just a punchline, and yeah Ramses L. Smuckles is a violent crotchety old man with strong outdated opinions but it would really make me sad if Achewood stopped having characters that I could really believe in.
Even if they are talking cats.
rhadamanthus
+0 -0
How are his opinions outdated? I can see not wanting a robot as a teacher for schoolchildren being seen as old-fogeyish, but we never learn to what extent robots have been developed in Achewood. Maybe they'd make decent math teachers?
How are his opinions outdated? I can see not wanting a robot as a teacher for schoolchildren being seen as old-fogeyish, but we never learn to what extent robots have been developed in Achewood. Maybe they'd make decent math teachers?
tripleg
+0 -0
or maybe they'd be advancing their hideous robot agenda in our schools !
or maybe they'd be advancing their hideous robot agenda in our schools !
whiteturtle
+0 -0
the children
the children
chuvak
+0 -0
You're a strange dude hausea.
You're a strange dude hausea.
deusoma
+0 -0
I dislike Ramses not because his opinions are outdated, but because he is basically a walking incarnation of the Chuck Norris joke, the man so badass that he can never be defeated by anyone and his army did not rebel after he denied them dinner. The Invincible Man is the most boring character type in all of fiction, and it is shockingly out of place in Achewood.
I dislike Ramses not because his opinions are outdated, but because he is basically a walking incarnation of the Chuck Norris joke, the man so badass that he can never be defeated by anyone and his army did not rebel after he denied them dinner. The Invincible Man is the most boring character type in all of fiction, and it is shockingly out of place in Achewood.
stereo
+0 -0
He didn't ask for no damn army.
On the other hand, I don't like him either.
He didn't ask for no damn army.
On the other hand, I don't like him either.
whiteturtle
+0 -1
Righteous indignation is the most useless and destructive emotion in the human canon. Everyone feels jealousy, or rage, or fear, but it is only when we become righteously indignant about it that people do horrible things to other people. Rameses is a fictional character. No real person could be so immaculate. People like Rameses in real life were assholes like John Wayne.
Righteous indignation is the most useless and destructive emotion in the human canon. Everyone feels jealousy, or rage, or fear, but it is only when we become righteously indignant about it that people do horrible things to other people. Rameses is a fictional character. No real person could be so immaculate. People like Rameses in real life were assholes like John Wayne.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
5
'cuz of "I don't ever want to see you again unless it's in a coffin"
if i burst out with spontaneous laughter and immediately think up 5 circumstances where i can use a joke, BAM.. it's a 5.
5
'cuz of "I don't ever want to see you again unless it's in a coffin"
if i burst out with spontaneous laughter and immediately think up 5 circumstances where i can use a joke, BAM.. it's a 5.
missbee
+0 -0
Is it spontaneous laughter if something made you laugh?
Is it spontaneous laughter if something made you laugh?
rowboat
+0 -0
If something does not make you laugh, it is not laughter. That is all I'm sure about.
If something does not make you laugh, it is not laughter. That is all I'm sure about.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
we'd have to get into pointless over played internet discussion based on semantics regarding the word 'spontaneous'.
something spontaneous is like a sneeze. you can't control. it just happens. the laughter came on like that. just blurted out.
we'd have to get into pointless over played internet discussion based on semantics regarding the word 'spontaneous'.
something spontaneous is like a sneeze. you can't control. it just happens. the laughter came on like that. just blurted out.
mattylite
+8 -1
I fived this. I just started thinkin' about all the strips where Ray is on the phone and making all these great Ray faces. So then I was looking some up. Oh man, some classics in there. Prankin' Cathy, um, some others, and .. . well I guess what I'm tryin' to say is I was real stoned and now I made this stupid-assed animated gif:
[IMGS OFF]
I fived this. I just started thinkin' about all the strips where Ray is on the phone and making all these great Ray faces. So then I was looking some up. Oh man, some classics in there. Prankin' Cathy, um, some others, and .. . well I guess what I'm tryin' to say is I was real stoned and now I made this stupid-assed animated gif:
[IMGS OFF]
rowboat
+1 -0
I just watched this for three minutes. I'm not even high.
I just watched this for three minutes. I'm not even high.
kickstart
+1 -0
Ray Smuckles *does* change facial expressions.
Ray Smuckles *does* change facial expressions.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
i logged in just to chubby that gif. ill.
i logged in just to chubby that gif. ill.
nice-on-water
+1 -1
RAD! RAAAAD!
Fucking RAD! Bringing back Ramses! Even if it's a one off! FUCKING RAAAAAAAD!
Belgand, what do you think of this comic?
RAD! RAAAAD!
Fucking RAD! Bringing back Ramses! Even if it's a one off! FUCKING RAAAAAAAD!
Belgand, what do you think of this comic?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I guess he said it up there.^
Maybe...maybe I agree a bit, belgand.
I guess he said it up there.^
Maybe...maybe I agree a bit, belgand.
belgand
+0 -0
Three, but I could swing it down to a two if I think about it a lot more. My statements on this matter are already well chronicled, that is, unless you're only asking in a sarcastic manner.
Three, but I could swing it down to a two if I think about it a lot more. My statements on this matter are already well chronicled, that is, unless you're only asking in a sarcastic manner.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
No I just saw what you said, and while I agree (because I've always been on the "less is more" side of the debate), I don't think it's below a 4. I 5'd it.
No I just saw what you said, and while I agree (because I've always been on the "less is more" side of the debate), I don't think it's below a 4. I 5'd it.
missbee
+0 -0
I think nice-on-water had a lot of water before reading todays strip?
I think nice-on-water had a lot of water before reading todays strip?
missbee
+1 -0
I think I'll end all of my sentences with question marks for the rest of today?
I think I'll end all of my sentences with question marks for the rest of today?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
????
????
missbee
+1 -0
?????
?????
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Nah babe, the nice is inside me.
::innuendo ensues::
Nah babe, the nice is inside me.
::innuendo ensues::
ashoykh
+0 -0
The fact that [R]ay got pocket dialed tells me that Ramses ain't got alot of numbers in his cell.
The fact that [R]ay got pocket dialed tells me that Ramses ain't got alot of numbers in his cell.
whiteturtle
+1 -1
or that Ramses's ass is so amazingly toned it has the dexterity to dial whatever number he wants through his pants.
Dude doesn't wear underwear. Underwear is for pansies that can't stand the feel on their own manhood.
or that Ramses's ass is so amazingly toned it has the dexterity to dial whatever number he wants through his pants.
Dude doesn't wear underwear. Underwear is for pansies that can't stand the feel on their own manhood.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I'm so manly I don't even wear PANTS
I'm so manly I don't even wear PANTS
woodenteeth
+0 -0
It was a happy day when he finally stopped calling me PANTS.
It was a happy day when he finally stopped calling me PANTS.
usversusthem
+0 -0
Doc Manhattan would agree with you, if he could be bothered to formulate thoughts that tiny.
Doc Manhattan would agree with you, if he could be bothered to formulate thoughts that tiny.
belgand
+1 -0
He can certainly be bothered to formulate a wang that tiny.
He can certainly be bothered to formulate a wang that tiny.
tekende
+1 -0
You see his Manhattan Project like four times in the movie. I can't believe the filmmakers got away with that.
You see his Manhattan Project like four times in the movie. I can't believe the filmmakers got away with that.
howl
+0 -0
I was wondering if they did that. Maybe because it's blue?
I was wondering if they did that. Maybe because it's blue?
plummet
+0 -0
chub for manhattan project
chub for manhattan project
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Not that I'm counting but I get the feeling it was totally more than 4 times. I was pretty happy they didn't shy away from the boy nudity... and also very suprised they got it past censors. Hooray for unusualy penis colour and lack of pubic hair and glowing fairy like colours and the lack of minute detail.
Not that I'm counting but I get the feeling it was totally more than 4 times. I was pretty happy they didn't shy away from the boy nudity... and also very suprised they got it past censors. Hooray for unusualy penis colour and lack of pubic hair and glowing fairy like colours and the lack of minute detail.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I loved how, in one of the Mars scenes the camera kept getting ever so close to a very close up shot of Dr. Manhattan's Godhead Smurf Penis.
Also, the Owlship sex scene was better choreographed than most porn I've seen. It got me so hot that I went home and slept with my wife!
I loved how, in one of the Mars scenes the camera kept getting ever so close to a very close up shot of Dr. Manhattan's Godhead Smurf Penis.
Also, the Owlship sex scene was better choreographed than most porn I've seen. It got me so hot that I went home and slept with my wife!
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
I have to say it somewhere somehow so I'll say it here - please tgh read no criticism of how you could make something good out of seeing the movie. That movie was bad, like a disgrace and a poor interpretation, like a failed cover of a beautiful song and a hell of a way to turn a good story into a weak ass scenario made into a lame sequence of frames you can't relate to, but mostly bad like a bad movie. I'm ashamed I have eyes now. There are worst ways to lose two and half hours, but most of them include being in a coffin with maggots reaching to your nostrils and you can't quite grab and answer the phone that some Kanye West fan dropped by your knee.
I have to say it somewhere somehow so I'll say it here - please tgh read no criticism of how you could make something good out of seeing the movie. That movie was bad, like a disgrace and a poor interpretation, like a failed cover of a beautiful song and a hell of a way to turn a good story into a weak ass scenario made into a lame sequence of frames you can't relate to, but mostly bad like a bad movie. I'm ashamed I have eyes now. There are worst ways to lose two and half hours, but most of them include being in a coffin with maggots reaching to your nostrils and you can't quite grab and answer the phone that some Kanye West fan dropped by your knee.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Wow. Errr... do you care to point out your major concern?
Wow. Errr... do you care to point out your major concern?
stereo
+0 -0
I'd guess he's not happy with how much of the story was dropped, and that they added in new fight scenes (but hey it's Hollywood, they have some sort of charter about that)
I'd guess he's not happy with how much of the story was dropped, and that they added in new fight scenes (but hey it's Hollywood, they have some sort of charter about that)
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Did they really drop THAT much story though... I suppose it depends on how long you are committed to sitting in a theatre to have all of the plot covered. They definitely have to cut it down for budgetary purposes and mainstream consumption. In summary, I thought it was great.
Did they really drop THAT much story though... I suppose it depends on how long you are committed to sitting in a theatre to have all of the plot covered. They definitely have to cut it down for budgetary purposes and mainstream consumption. In summary, I thought it was great.
belgand
+0 -0
Screw the mainstream consumption bullshit. It's kinda crap when they announce before a film releases that there will be even more footage added back in for the DVD release. I mean, yeah, it's good that it'll be there, but what about just releasing the damn thing properly the first time.
I've never complained about a film being long. You want to make it four hours? Five? I'm totally game if it's good and necessary. Better value for my money.
Screw the mainstream consumption bullshit. It's kinda crap when they announce before a film releases that there will be even more footage added back in for the DVD release. I mean, yeah, it's good that it'll be there, but what about just releasing the damn thing properly the first time.
I've never complained about a film being long. You want to make it four hours? Five? I'm totally game if it's good and necessary. Better value for my money.
stereo
+0 -0
I don't think they left out anything important, just interesting stuff. And for that, extending it to 4-5 hours in a theatre is a bit much for me.
I'll probably buy the DVD for that, I have more time at home and can eat my own foods and suchlike.
I don't think they left out anything important, just interesting stuff. And for that, extending it to 4-5 hours in a theatre is a bit much for me.
I'll probably buy the DVD for that, I have more time at home and can eat my own foods and suchlike.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Just to be clear I'm not at all about forcing things to be mainstream consumable. Also, I have a friend who takes your stance, that 4-5 hours is fine as long as it's necessary. Whereas I'm with stereo. It's a bit too much.
Just to be clear I'm not at all about forcing things to be mainstream consumable. Also, I have a friend who takes your stance, that 4-5 hours is fine as long as it's necessary. Whereas I'm with stereo. It's a bit too much.
vheissu
+0 -0
Screw that. I'm game for four or five hours if it is worth it, but more of the same from that movie would not have been. If they cut about half the scenes by half their length, they probably would have ended up with the same amount of story, then they could have added more in. Instead he had to go all kitsch art-director and make the scenes way too long out of some sense of misplaced homage.
I actually thought the movie was pretty entertaining, but that was a major gripe for me.
Screw that. I'm game for four or five hours if it is worth it, but more of the same from that movie would not have been. If they cut about half the scenes by half their length, they probably would have ended up with the same amount of story, then they could have added more in. Instead he had to go all kitsch art-director and make the scenes way too long out of some sense of misplaced homage.
I actually thought the movie was pretty entertaining, but that was a major gripe for me.
octafish
+2 -0
That they are not called Crimebusters in the film?
What? they aren't called Crimebusters? What are they called?
The Watchmen
THAT'S IT. I'M NOT SEEING IT. IT IS A TRAVESTY, A TRAVESTY!
That they are not called Crimebusters in the film?
What? they aren't called Crimebusters? What are they called?
The Watchmen
THAT'S IT. I'M NOT SEEING IT. IT IS A TRAVESTY, A TRAVESTY!
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Chubs.
Chubs.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Okay, I was just getting out of seeing it. Maybe I overreacted, and maybe I was just expecting to find a bit of what I experienced when reading the comic.
Basically, I guess I'm saying it sucks because there's no vision here!
I think it's a shame to shoot it frame for frame and yet miss the tone. If it's Snyder's interpretation of the book, it's like he never really read it but rather was told the story by someone who was pointing some panels to him. There's idiosyncrasy, rhythm and ambivalence aplenty that was lost or turned into Badang Kappow fight scenes. It's bland where it was rich. A shame.
Also, the production turned the implied score into a parody, the acting is sub-par, it's shot and edited like an expensive tv show, costume folks become superpowered killing machines, and the cool monster of dread disappeared.
It's really not what they dropped in terms of scenes that bothers me, it's how they're pretending that making a smart movie from a smart book is impossible and we should accept it. Apparently, Snyder has no problem accepting it as a given, but hell if I'm gonna be contemporary to the trend he's reveling in without posting my outrage on assetbar.
Okay, I was just getting out of seeing it. Maybe I overreacted, and maybe I was just expecting to find a bit of what I experienced when reading the comic.
Basically, I guess I'm saying it sucks because there's no vision here!
I think it's a shame to shoot it frame for frame and yet miss the tone. If it's Snyder's interpretation of the book, it's like he never really read it but rather was told the story by someone who was pointing some panels to him. There's idiosyncrasy, rhythm and ambivalence aplenty that was lost or turned into Badang Kappow fight scenes. It's bland where it was rich. A shame.
Also, the production turned the implied score into a parody, the acting is sub-par, it's shot and edited like an expensive tv show, costume folks become superpowered killing machines, and the cool monster of dread disappeared.
It's really not what they dropped in terms of scenes that bothers me, it's how they're pretending that making a smart movie from a smart book is impossible and we should accept it. Apparently, Snyder has no problem accepting it as a given, but hell if I'm gonna be contemporary to the trend he's reveling in without posting my outrage on assetbar.
falseprophet
+2 -0
Quote:
"This is all your fault, Snyder!"
[starts beating assetbar to a pulp. Other assetbaristas try to stop them, but deafwhisperer simply swings his massive fists about and sends them careening into the walls]
"Screw you, Snyder! FUCK YOU!"
Quote:
Apparently, Snyder has no problem accepting it as a given, but hell if I'm gonna be contemporary to the trend he's reveling in without posting my outrage on assetbar.
"This is all your fault, Snyder!"
[starts beating assetbar to a pulp. Other assetbaristas try to stop them, but deafwhisperer simply swings his massive fists about and sends them careening into the walls]
"Screw you, Snyder! FUCK YOU!"
whiteturtle
+0 -0
I really don't see how you could call the movie a poor interpretation considering their slavish devotion to preserving as many frames of the comic as they could.
I think Snyder did this to a fault, and that the movie is fatally flawed in some important ways, but it did evoke the story very powerfully and allowed me to re-experience it with some fresh wonder.
A story is just a story, and Snyder wasn't out to exploit Watchmen to make a buck, he had genuine reverence for the material. If the movie had to be made in the first place, at least there wasn't a talking Bubastis and a happy ending.
I mean, seriously, the fact that a serious adaptation of Watchmen exists and that society en masse is discussing the original work stands as a victory, I think.
I really don't see how you could call the movie a poor interpretation considering their slavish devotion to preserving as many frames of the comic as they could.
I think Snyder did this to a fault, and that the movie is fatally flawed in some important ways, but it did evoke the story very powerfully and allowed me to re-experience it with some fresh wonder.
A story is just a story, and Snyder wasn't out to exploit Watchmen to make a buck, he had genuine reverence for the material. If the movie had to be made in the first place, at least there wasn't a talking Bubastis and a happy ending.
I mean, seriously, the fact that a serious adaptation of Watchmen exists and that society en masse is discussing the original work stands as a victory, I think.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
he wasn't out to exploit Watchmen just to make a buck, I should say.
he wasn't out to exploit Watchmen just to make a buck, I should say.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I geniunely feel like Snyder doesn't have an exploiting bone in his body. I'm not apologizing for him, I hated what he did with DotD and haven't seen nor really plan on seeing 300, but I get the feeling he has an appreciation for medium that some action directors just do not have.
I think the changes that were made enabled it to be marketable, and I didn't feel like any fights scenes were added on, just magnified (the prison fighting was barely shown in the book, for example yet was the key setpiece in the movie.
I actually hadn't read the book for a while so my girlfriend, who just finished reading it because I gave her the book for Valentine's Day, caught a lot more of the shot-for-shot stuff than I did.
I think that this is probably the most faithful adaptation we will probably ever get, moreso than if Gilliam or Aranofsky or any other director who was at one point in a position to do the film, and while I don't think it absolutely NEEDED to be adapted I'd rather have one that was as close to the book as humanly possible while still missing the point than a 9/11-sploitation film or a film where Dr. Manhattan goes back in time and stops Ozymandias and everyone lives (two films that almost happened).
My only true beef with the movie was the fucking guy who played Ozy. Holy shit did he suck and miss the point of the character.
I geniunely feel like Snyder doesn't have an exploiting bone in his body. I'm not apologizing for him, I hated what he did with DotD and haven't seen nor really plan on seeing 300, but I get the feeling he has an appreciation for medium that some action directors just do not have.
I think the changes that were made enabled it to be marketable, and I didn't feel like any fights scenes were added on, just magnified (the prison fighting was barely shown in the book, for example yet was the key setpiece in the movie.
I actually hadn't read the book for a while so my girlfriend, who just finished reading it because I gave her the book for Valentine's Day, caught a lot more of the shot-for-shot stuff than I did.
I think that this is probably the most faithful adaptation we will probably ever get, moreso than if Gilliam or Aranofsky or any other director who was at one point in a position to do the film, and while I don't think it absolutely NEEDED to be adapted I'd rather have one that was as close to the book as humanly possible while still missing the point than a 9/11-sploitation film or a film where Dr. Manhattan goes back in time and stops Ozymandias and everyone lives (two films that almost happened).
My only true beef with the movie was the fucking guy who played Ozy. Holy shit did he suck and miss the point of the character.
stereo
+0 -0
Yeah, I thought they did pretty well casting for the most part, but Ozymandias was bad.
I did think it was neat how even though they dropped the newsman subplot entirely, they still showed the destruction of New York almost frame for frame, including all the characters who were present, even though they hadn't actually showed up before.
Yeah, I thought they did pretty well casting for the most part, but Ozymandias was bad.
I did think it was neat how even though they dropped the newsman subplot entirely, they still showed the destruction of New York almost frame for frame, including all the characters who were present, even though they hadn't actually showed up before.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
That scene was more heartwrenching for me having read the book than a normal viewer. In the book the squid basically just teleports in and they all pretty much die, it is fast and not as telegraphed (I may be remembering this wrong) but in the movie it lingers and lingers and I was just thinking about all those characters lives and started bawling. It hit me the same as the book but was just visually more impacting than the squid ending.
Also I cried at the (SPOILER)Rorschach death scene. So well acted.
I laughed through the sex scene though, although I had to shift to conceal my rock hard human cock.
That scene was more heartwrenching for me having read the book than a normal viewer. In the book the squid basically just teleports in and they all pretty much die, it is fast and not as telegraphed (I may be remembering this wrong) but in the movie it lingers and lingers and I was just thinking about all those characters lives and started bawling. It hit me the same as the book but was just visually more impacting than the squid ending.
Also I cried at the (SPOILER)Rorschach death scene. So well acted.
I laughed through the sex scene though, although I had to shift to conceal my rock hard human cock.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
It was a bad badly placed sex scene. They really could have made it a bit more obviously comical (i.e. Nite Owl can't get it off unless he's Nite Owl).
It was a bad badly placed sex scene. They really could have made it a bit more obviously comical (i.e. Nite Owl can't get it off unless he's Nite Owl).
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yeah, for all the hamfisted sledgehammer themes in the movie they made the fact that Dan's impotence only applies to his citizen alter ego so subtle you wouldn't notice.
Yeah, for all the hamfisted sledgehammer themes in the movie they made the fact that Dan's impotence only applies to his citizen alter ego so subtle you wouldn't notice.
stereo
+0 -0
They do have a bit of time to contemplate in the book, it's hard to judge time though. It doesn't help that Bernie's last words are "hold me." :( Did they really have to die?
They do have a bit of time to contemplate in the book, it's hard to judge time though. It doesn't help that Bernie's last words are "hold me." :( Did they really have to die?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yeah, the first time I read the book I swear I thought the kid made it out, for some reason I thought the field of destruction was smaller and he and the butch lesbian were just on the outskirts of it, but then I read it again...
Yeah, the first time I read the book I swear I thought the kid made it out, for some reason I thought the field of destruction was smaller and he and the butch lesbian were just on the outskirts of it, but then I read it again...
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I'd say that was casting. He just looked a little too effeminate to play Ozy.
I'd say that was casting. He just looked a little too effeminate to play Ozy.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I was glad they avoided going with famous people to play the characters, but I think Phillip Seymour Hoffman would have been better as Ozy, with that kid playing a younger Ozy.
I was glad they avoided going with famous people to play the characters, but I think Phillip Seymour Hoffman would have been better as Ozy, with that kid playing a younger Ozy.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Jude fucking Law. He looks right, he's a good actor and he's a Watchmen freak. He has a Rorschach tattoo for heaven's sake.
Jude fucking Law. He looks right, he's a good actor and he's a Watchmen freak. He has a Rorschach tattoo for heaven's sake.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
... and four hundred times more famous than ANYONE in that movie. Would have been odd. But I agree, in a perfect world that would have been an excellent choice.
Oh... and where is that tattoo?
... and four hundred times more famous than ANYONE in that movie. Would have been odd. But I agree, in a perfect world that would have been an excellent choice.
Oh... and where is that tattoo?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Tramp stamp, I hope.
Tramp stamp, I hope.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I dunno, Jeffrey Dean Morgan is making quite a name for himself as a character actor. I just wish he could get a role where he doesn't die at the "end" of it.
I dunno, Jeffrey Dean Morgan is making quite a name for himself as a character actor. I just wish he could get a role where he doesn't die at the "end" of it.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Hah! Phillip Seymour Hoffman!! Retract! The dude is a little too... husky .
Hah! Phillip Seymour Hoffman!! Retract! The dude is a little too... husky .
theguitarhero
+0 -0
See, ok, maybe I haven't read it enough but older Ozy looks bulky. I mean, he'd have to work out obviously but PSH has the right build I think.
See, ok, maybe I haven't read it enough but older Ozy looks bulky. I mean, he'd have to work out obviously but PSH has the right build I think.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Even in the end Ozy is super toned. Bulky = Muscle bound. The guy kicks everyone's ass except for Dr. Manhattan. I would suggest that PSH would have to do some serious preperation for the role (i.e. a year or so).
Even in the end Ozy is super toned. Bulky = Muscle bound. The guy kicks everyone's ass except for Dr. Manhattan. I would suggest that PSH would have to do some serious preperation for the role (i.e. a year or so).
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Well considering there had been talks about this specific incarnation of the movie for a while now, he would have had time.
Shit, I'd wait until 2010 for this version of Watchmen with PSH as older Ozy. That shit was just irredeemable.
Well considering there had been talks about this specific incarnation of the movie for a while now, he would have had time.
Shit, I'd wait until 2010 for this version of Watchmen with PSH as older Ozy. That shit was just irredeemable.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
I have to agree. PSH would absolutely nail Ozy. All soft voiced and believable, "Hey, what a nice, funny guy. Definitely a good guy." Then, "Oh shit, he is scary, how did I fall for that." Cept for the chunky middle-agedness, he would have been perfect.
I have to agree. PSH would absolutely nail Ozy. All soft voiced and believable, "Hey, what a nice, funny guy. Definitely a good guy." Then, "Oh shit, he is scary, how did I fall for that." Cept for the chunky middle-agedness, he would have been perfect.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I'm definitely going to have to re-read it but I always thought that Ozy was the second oldest, after The Comedian. Nite Owl and Rorschach are the closest in age and Laurie is the youngest (although not by much. I'd put Dr. Manhattan in there but age is relative for him. He seems younger than his old form anyway).
I think the thing where Snyder failed was that it didn't have to be image for image the same as the book. If they had let it slide a bit they could have gotten better actors, although I feel the only one who needed to be replaced was Ozy.
I'm definitely going to have to re-read it but I always thought that Ozy was the second oldest, after The Comedian. Nite Owl and Rorschach are the closest in age and Laurie is the youngest (although not by much. I'd put Dr. Manhattan in there but age is relative for him. He seems younger than his old form anyway).
I think the thing where Snyder failed was that it didn't have to be image for image the same as the book. If they had let it slide a bit they could have gotten better actors, although I feel the only one who needed to be replaced was Ozy.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
Fully agreed. For all the bitching about Malin Ackerman's performance, I never thought that Laurie was all that well fleshed out anyway. She's a superhero because her mom was? So? Moore, if I remember right, never really goes there. She's just "the girl", and Ackerman is "a girl". Ozy was the weak sauce. A bad villain would normally kill a movie, but the real villain in Watchmen is Mankind Itself, so a bad Ozy doesn't hurt it that much, just weakens a core support beam.
Fully agreed. For all the bitching about Malin Ackerman's performance, I never thought that Laurie was all that well fleshed out anyway. She's a superhero because her mom was? So? Moore, if I remember right, never really goes there. She's just "the girl", and Ackerman is "a girl". Ozy was the weak sauce. A bad villain would normally kill a movie, but the real villain in Watchmen is Mankind Itself, so a bad Ozy doesn't hurt it that much, just weakens a core support beam.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yeah, the one line at the end where he says "I'm not a comic book villain" almost had me yelling if there wasn't a lot of people in theater, because that was exactly what he was acting like.
Yeah, the one line at the end where he says "I'm not a comic book villain" almost had me yelling if there wasn't a lot of people in theater, because that was exactly what he was acting like.
falseprophet
+0 -0
The line in the graphic novel is "Dan, I'm not a republic serial villain. Do you seriously think I'd explain my masterstroke if there remained the slightest chance of you affecting its outcome? I did it thirty-five minutes ago."
Yeah, I'd be mad, too. Republic serials are so different from comic books. Whatever the fuck they are.
The line in the graphic novel is "Dan, I'm not a republic serial villain. Do you seriously think I'd explain my masterstroke if there remained the slightest chance of you affecting its outcome? I did it thirty-five minutes ago."
Yeah, I'd be mad, too. Republic serials are so different from comic books. Whatever the fuck they are.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
When I see Philippe's face when he's told what the saddest thing is, I relate mucho because it's how I think I looked the first time I read that line.
[seriousvilain]"I did it thirty five minutes ago."[/biuquote]
In the little movie adaptation in my head, that panel would be a freeze frame that lasts three hours and twelve minutes.
When I see Philippe's face when he's told what the saddest thing is, I relate mucho because it's how I think I looked the first time I read that line.
[seriousvilain]"I did it thirty five minutes ago."[/biuquote]
In the little movie adaptation in my head, that panel would be a freeze frame that lasts three hours and twelve minutes.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I was madder that the actor was so horrible.
I was madder that the actor was so horrible.
stereo
+0 -0
After some thought, I realized... they took out smokes (and other drugs) indiscriminately regardless of whether they were a plot point
- Rorschach never stubs out a cigarette in a kid's eye
- Laurie randomly hits the flamethrower, instead of trying to find a pipe lighter
- Ozymandias's revelation to become like Alexander is not influenced by heroin
Only the Comedian smokes cigars.
Is this a Hollywood thing or an intentional decision?
After some thought, I realized... they took out smokes (and other drugs) indiscriminately regardless of whether they were a plot point
- Rorschach never stubs out a cigarette in a kid's eye
- Laurie randomly hits the flamethrower, instead of trying to find a pipe lighter
- Ozymandias's revelation to become like Alexander is not influenced by heroin
Only the Comedian smokes cigars.
Is this a Hollywood thing or an intentional decision?
tekende
+0 -0
A little of both. Hollywood has for some time been moving towards "only bad people smoke", and one of the producers of Watchmen hates smoking and absolutely would not allow anyone who wasn't a bad guy (the Comedian) to smoke. So yeah, instead of Laurie accidentally setting the basement on fire due to an honest mistake, she pushes the flamethrower button like a curious three-year-old.
A little of both. Hollywood has for some time been moving towards "only bad people smoke", and one of the producers of Watchmen hates smoking and absolutely would not allow anyone who wasn't a bad guy (the Comedian) to smoke. So yeah, instead of Laurie accidentally setting the basement on fire due to an honest mistake, she pushes the flamethrower button like a curious three-year-old.
stereo
+0 -0
I dunno how you can argue the Comedian was bad without throwing in Rorschach. But I guess that's Hollywood logic.
I dunno how you can argue the Comedian was bad without throwing in Rorschach. But I guess that's Hollywood logic.
tekende
+0 -0
I'm not making that argument. The producer is, and maybe Zack Snyder.
I'm not making that argument. The producer is, and maybe Zack Snyder.
belgand
+0 -0
It was a ball of hashish, not heroin which he went into the desert and ate.
It was a ball of hashish, not heroin which he went into the desert and ate.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
And Adrian and the kid bullying Rorschach are both pretty much villains themselves. I guess the problem with the latter is that it's an underage kid smoking. And then being horribly blinded too, I guess.
And Adrian and the kid bullying Rorschach are both pretty much villains themselves. I guess the problem with the latter is that it's an underage kid smoking. And then being horribly blinded too, I guess.
stereo
+0 -0
I don't have real figures for all of them, but...
The Comedian - b. 1919 or so.
Silver Spectre - conceived 1945? Unclear whether this is when the attempted rape or actual fatherhood occured
Ozymandias - became hero 1958
Manhattan - "accident" 1960
That would put the meeting of the Crimebusters around 1962-3, for Laurie to be jailbait.
I don't have real figures for all of them, but...
The Comedian - b. 1919 or so.
Silver Spectre - conceived 1945? Unclear whether this is when the attempted rape or actual fatherhood occured
Ozymandias - became hero 1958
Manhattan - "accident" 1960
That would put the meeting of the Crimebusters around 1962-3, for Laurie to be jailbait.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
What fucking Spectre?!
What fucking Spectre?!
stereo
+0 -0
Silk Spectre, I dunno where Silver came from.
Silk Spectre, I dunno where Silver came from.
belgand
+0 -0
Do you work for the State Department?
Do you work for the State Department?
whiteturtle
+0 -0
The lack of context for this post due to assebarification I find humorous
The lack of context for this post due to assebarification I find humorous
alexdelarge
+0 -1
keeps it clean, keeps it copasetic. the little boys and girls heads are all collected- pearl jam, dirty frank
keeps it clean, keeps it copasetic. the little boys and girls heads are all collected- pearl jam, dirty frank
morypcaina
+0 -0
ramses is one bad mother
Shut your mouth!
ramses is one bad mother
Shut your mouth!
unclemikey
+0 -0
Maybe my favorite Achewood ever, or at least of the ones without Nice Pete
Maybe my favorite Achewood ever, or at least of the ones without Nice Pete
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Phone Jacket.
Phone Jacket.
morypcaina
+0 -0
It's almost like he knew...
But it's Ray so he didn't know.
It's almost like he knew...
But it's Ray so he didn't know.
missbee
+0 -0
My mind has been blown.
I thought something was strange but I couldn't put my finger on it
My mind has been blown.
I thought something was strange but I couldn't put my finger on it
fermatprime
+0 -0
Ray's mouth in panels 9-10 is not something that should be physiologically possible.
Ray's mouth in panels 9-10 is not something that should be physiologically possible.
octafish
+1 -0
Well there you go Ramses drives the same car as Max Rockatansky, Sarse and Scuttle, and Roop and Charlie.
We're out of the game, oh and you better send a meat truck, Charlie's copped a saucepan to to the throat.
Well there you go Ramses drives the same car as Max Rockatansky, Sarse and Scuttle, and Roop and Charlie.
We're out of the game, oh and you better send a meat truck, Charlie's copped a saucepan to to the throat.
fedallah
+1 -0
We're really gonna get it this time! He had his indicator on!
We're really gonna get it this time! He had his indicator on!
lynnym
+0 -0
Not a five. But this has already been discussed, above.
Not a five. But this has already been discussed, above.
lynnym
+0 -1
...someday I'll come to this site and not BITCH, I promise. But damn if I need to say that the strip is going wrong.
...someday I'll come to this site and not BITCH, I promise. But damn if I need to say that the strip is going wrong.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
It's not a five, but it's pretty funny. Just by my theory on voting, 5s should only come up every now and then.
It's not a five, but it's pretty funny. Just by my theory on voting, 5s should only come up every now and then.
stereo
+0 -0
I try to keep my 5s to about 10 strips max. Otherwise it just becomes meaningless.
I try to keep my 5s to about 10 strips max. Otherwise it just becomes meaningless.
wingspan
+0 -0
I kind of wish there was an actual limit on the number of 5's that can be given out per user. I may be wrong, but i seem to remember that when we could see the ratings almost every last strip other than the cumbrella one and a few others had an average above 4. Even so, I'm not quite as frugal as you with my 5's. I figure if no more than 5% of the 1500 strips (about 75 at the moment) get your top rating you are using it responsibly.
I kind of wish there was an actual limit on the number of 5's that can be given out per user. I may be wrong, but i seem to remember that when we could see the ratings almost every last strip other than the cumbrella one and a few others had an average above 4. Even so, I'm not quite as frugal as you with my 5's. I figure if no more than 5% of the 1500 strips (about 75 at the moment) get your top rating you are using it responsibly.
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
I sometimes wish that instead of or in addition to having the user select some integer between 1 and 5 inclusive for each strip, assetbar would select (by some process) maybe 4 or 5 strips at a time and have the user order them from best to worst (and then deduce rankings from that).
I sometimes wish that instead of or in addition to having the user select some integer between 1 and 5 inclusive for each strip, assetbar would select (by some process) maybe 4 or 5 strips at a time and have the user order them from best to worst (and then deduce rankings from that).
miaou
+0 -0
What if the last 5 strips sucked ass?...
No, my opinion is that the rating should be based on a larger scale. From 1 to 10 or even 20 for instance.
Anyway the rating feature's kind of useless now the average isn't displayed...
What if the last 5 strips sucked ass?...
No, my opinion is that the rating should be based on a larger scale. From 1 to 10 or even 20 for instance.
Anyway the rating feature's kind of useless now the average isn't displayed...
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
I was thinking that assetbar's selection process would be somewhat random, but also biased in a way that depended on the given strip's ranking history (presumably in a way somewhat similar to e.g. kittenwar). Strips which tended to win ranking competitions frequently would be pitted against other strips which did the same. New strips would initally be compared to representatives from fixed regions of the ranking spectrum etc.
The thing I dislike about scale-based rating systems is that I often can't remember exactly how I feel about the given item in comparison to items which received the same scale score from me - and even when I can, it's hard to quantify the difference.
I was thinking that assetbar's selection process would be somewhat random, but also biased in a way that depended on the given strip's ranking history (presumably in a way somewhat similar to e.g. kittenwar). Strips which tended to win ranking competitions frequently would be pitted against other strips which did the same. New strips would initally be compared to representatives from fixed regions of the ranking spectrum etc.
The thing I dislike about scale-based rating systems is that I often can't remember exactly how I feel about the given item in comparison to items which received the same scale score from me - and even when I can, it's hard to quantify the difference.
miaou
+0 -0
Strips quality/appreciation may vary from a week to another; in which case basing the final rating on previous strips' ranking history would make it unfaithful in my opinion. I'd rather let my subjectivity inaccurately rate a few strips than let others affect my own assessment.
Strips quality/appreciation may vary from a week to another; in which case basing the final rating on previous strips' ranking history would make it unfaithful in my opinion. I'd rather let my subjectivity inaccurately rate a few strips than let others affect my own assessment.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Not really. You think that only .66% of the strips are worthy of a top ranking? It's all about personal preference, of course, and I'll agree that ranking too many strips as 5 makes it meaningless, but, on the flip side, only picking about 10 strips out of 1522 is ridiculously narrow. This guy has written a lot of fucking funny strips.
My own personal percentage of 5's is probably hovers slightly above 10%.
Not really. You think that only .66% of the strips are worthy of a top ranking? It's all about personal preference, of course, and I'll agree that ranking too many strips as 5 makes it meaningless, but, on the flip side, only picking about 10 strips out of 1522 is ridiculously narrow. This guy has written a lot of fucking funny strips.
My own personal percentage of 5's is probably hovers slightly above 10%.
stereo
+0 -0
There's a "highest rated strips" section of the personal page, I want that to display my actual 10 favourites, not 10 randomly selected from the large number of decent ones.
There's a "highest rated strips" section of the personal page, I want that to display my actual 10 favourites, not 10 randomly selected from the large number of decent ones.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
You actually look at that? You don't compare yours to other peoples, do you? Is this endemic of you younger generations, always digitally cataloging and comparing yourselves through software (last.fm, facebook, etc.)?
Sorry, just going off on a tangent...and being an outstanding prick in a world where I'm no longer relevant, apparently.
You actually look at that? You don't compare yours to other peoples, do you? Is this endemic of you younger generations, always digitally cataloging and comparing yourselves through software (last.fm, facebook, etc.)?
Sorry, just going off on a tangent...and being an outstanding prick in a world where I'm no longer relevant, apparently.
machineelf
+0 -0
5, mostly for the bit about 'thrown COMPLETELY over the gym.' no sense throwing a man half-way over a gym, is there?
5, mostly for the bit about 'thrown COMPLETELY over the gym.' no sense throwing a man half-way over a gym, is there?
chuvak
+3 -0
This strip is about priority conflict. Calzone vs. Handing a Man His Ass. WHAT WILL TRIUMPH? hint:
[IMGS OFF]
This strip is about priority conflict. Calzone vs. Handing a Man His Ass. WHAT WILL TRIUMPH? hint:
[IMGS OFF]
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Nice food porn.
Nice food porn.
bambule
+1 -2
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
aperson
+6 -0
I was just thinking how making a big deal of how your phone impersonates an old phone is a dick move, and along comes xkcd with corroborating evidence.
I was just thinking how making a big deal of how your phone impersonates an old phone is a dick move, and along comes xkcd with corroborating evidence.
belgand
+0 -0
No, those sounds that are just like a recorded phone ringing are the worst. They sound so astoundingly fake and weird. I need to have a beepy sort of ring such that it feels like the phone is actually making the noise and not just playing it back.
No, those sounds that are just like a recorded phone ringing are the worst. They sound so astoundingly fake and weird. I need to have a beepy sort of ring such that it feels like the phone is actually making the noise and not just playing it back.
aperson
+0 -0
Man I totally agree with you on
R-Ding-Ding-Di-Ding-Di-Di-Di-Ding-Ding
Bop-Bo-Bop-Bo-Bop-Bop-Booop-Bop-Bop-Bob
Be-Bob-Bob-Bob-Bob-Brrim-Brram
Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba
WEEEE
Hang on I really have to take this...
Man I totally agree with you on
R-Ding-Ding-Di-Ding-Di-Di-Di-Ding-Ding
Bop-Bo-Bop-Bo-Bop-Bop-Booop-Bop-Bop-Bob
Be-Bob-Bob-Bob-Bob-Brrim-Brram
Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba
WEEEE
Hang on I really have to take this...
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Man I would totally love it if you had a scat ringtone.
Man I would totally love it if you had a scat ringtone.
stereo
+0 -0
I think he's doing an impression of Crazy Frog.
But then what do I know, my phone rings like every touchtone phone since the damn things were invented.
I think he's doing an impression of Crazy Frog.
But then what do I know, my phone rings like every touchtone phone since the damn things were invented.
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
FACT: Most pebbles goes groshe-store wonce-E week 'least 4 2 get milk mebe.
FACT: Pizza-hut pizz is of a quality 2 suggest best taste
FACT: Is 4chune 2 bye with monies--sorry got run
FACT: Most pebbles goes groshe-store wonce-E week 'least 4 2 get milk mebe.
FACT: Pizza-hut pizz is of a quality 2 suggest best taste
FACT: Is 4chune 2 bye with monies--sorry got run
hobit
+0 -0
tonyhighwind
+0 -0
Ramses Luther Smuckles could kick your ass simply by speaking. He uses his fists as a courtesy so you still feel you can go on with your life, should he deign to leave you with it.
Ramses Luther Smuckles could kick your ass simply by speaking. He uses his fists as a courtesy so you still feel you can go on with your life, should he deign to leave you with it.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Ramses has severe arthritis in his hands now, from beating people up for a couple decades.
Not to mention when the Cuban Policia imprisoned him and broke every bone in his hands again.
He hopes as much as you do that he doesn't have to use his fists. Maybe more.
Ramses has severe arthritis in his hands now, from beating people up for a couple decades.
Not to mention when the Cuban Policia imprisoned him and broke every bone in his hands again.
He hopes as much as you do that he doesn't have to use his fists. Maybe more.
tonyhighwind
+0 -0
Blessing, curse, etc.
Blessing, curse, etc.
dasilodavi
+0 -0
Hmm.
Well.
It seems Ramses is a guy who likes to beat people up. He's a bully. I can't believe I'm saying this.
But.
Fuck that guy!
Hmm.
Well.
It seems Ramses is a guy who likes to beat people up. He's a bully. I can't believe I'm saying this.
But.
Fuck that guy!
stereo
+0 -0
If he wasn't fictional, you wouldn't dare say it.
So it must be true.
If he wasn't fictional, you wouldn't dare say it.
So it must be true.
radioelectric
+0 -0
Well you got a chubby from me even if you did spoil The Wrestler. Git!
Well you got a chubby from me even if you did spoil The Wrestler. Git!
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Calzones can save your life.
Cannolis; not so much.
Calzones can save your life.
Cannolis; not so much.
kickstart
+1 -0
Kick the ass. Take the calzone.
Kick the ass. Take the calzone.
aperson
+1 -0
Respect the calzone, tame the cannoli?
Respect the calzone, tame the cannoli?
belgand
+0 -0
I am suspecting that you have that backwards my good sir. Is it not "Respect the cock, tame the cunt"? I am not familiar with a calzone that is particularly cock-like, but definitely vice-versa.
I am suspecting that you have that backwards my good sir. Is it not "Respect the cock, tame the cunt"? I am not familiar with a calzone that is particularly cock-like, but definitely vice-versa.
boscostacy
+1 -0
Ramses Luther kind of reminds me of Rorschach.
Ramses Luther kind of reminds me of Rorschach.
missbee
+1 -0
I want to say something witty that will let everyone know, "Hey, everybody, I've read Watchmen too!"
But all I can say is:
Rorschach will never have children to abandon.
I want to say something witty that will let everyone know, "Hey, everybody, I've read Watchmen too!"
But all I can say is:
Rorschach will never have children to abandon.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
S... spoiler warning?
S... spoiler warning?
missbee
+0 -0
B...because he doesn't want to have children...?
Not...not spoiling anything here, no sir.
B...because he doesn't want to have children...?
Not...not spoiling anything here, no sir.
stereo
+0 -0
Yeah, his attitudes around hookers kinda indicate he's not into sex. And where would he find a wife?
Yeah, his attitudes around hookers kinda indicate he's not into sex. And where would he find a wife?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
You could also say that he would never abandon a child he had because he himself was somewhat abandoned as a child.
You could also say that he would never abandon a child he had because he himself was somewhat abandoned as a child.
missbee
+1 -1
"You did what?"
Daniel cringed.
"I...I cloned you."
"You...cloned me."
"Listen, Panda Bear--" Daniel began.
"Don't like it when you call me that. Having black and white mask does not make me panda bear."
"Okay, fine, Rorschach...just here me out on this one. I know that fighting evil or whatever is your life's grand work, but...sometimes I feel like you're too busy for me. And, y'know..." Daniel shifted uncomfortably and gazed down at his feet. "Sometimes, I have...urges. And when you're not around--"
Rorschach leapt up, hands over his ears. "YOU PROMISED WE WOULD NOT TALK ABOUT THAT. NEVER HAPPENED."
"Okay, okay! Sorry, Pan--Rorschach. So, the logical next step was to make another you."
"How is that a logical next step?" he sputtered, but Daniel wasn't listening.
"But..well, obviously, I did it wrong, because I meant to make an adult you. But instead, I made this tiny you."
He gestured to the child in question, a short, skinny boy with adorable red hair and freckles who was currently snoring gently on the couch.
"So, yeah...now we have this mini-Rorschach. But he's so cute! He looks like you, and he likes me to read him The New Frontiersmen before he goes to sleep at night, and---"
"Daniel, do you have any idea what I was like as a child? Burned boy's eye out with cigarette when TEN YEARS OLD. Was completely disturbed and fucked up."
"But this Rorschach won't be, because he'll have two daddies who love him very much! We'll make him cupcakes and sing to him and play pirates!"
Rorschach put his face in his hands, exasperated. "Not raising clone of myself. Not happening. Going now."
"But Panda Bear!" Daniel called out to him as he walked away. "How can you abandon him? Do you want him to have major daddy issues like you?"
That stopped Rorschach dead in his tracks. If Daniel really was hell-bent on raising this little clone (and it sounded like he was), he didn't want the kid to be all weird and miserable like he had been. There might be room for another Walter Kovacs in the world, but there sure as hell wasn't room for another Rorschach.
He turned around, looking at the little boy on the couch. He was wrapped up snugly in a fuzzy green blanket, and he looked very warm and cozy. He looked...happy.
Rorschach sighed. He really, really didn't want to create another fucked-up child. There were enough of those. And damnit, the kid looked just like him.
Well, no, not just like him. He looked how Rorschach might have looked if he never had become Rorschach, if he had been happy and safe and loved.
"Damnit. Fine. Will help you. But you owe me."
Daniel wiggled his eyebrows saucily. "Oh, don't worry...I'll pay you back. You won't regret this."
"You did what?"
Daniel cringed.
"I...I cloned you."
"You...cloned me."
"Listen, Panda Bear--" Daniel began.
"Don't like it when you call me that. Having black and white mask does not make me panda bear."
"Okay, fine, Rorschach...just here me out on this one. I know that fighting evil or whatever is your life's grand work, but...sometimes I feel like you're too busy for me. And, y'know..." Daniel shifted uncomfortably and gazed down at his feet. "Sometimes, I have...urges. And when you're not around--"
Rorschach leapt up, hands over his ears. "YOU PROMISED WE WOULD NOT TALK ABOUT THAT. NEVER HAPPENED."
"Okay, okay! Sorry, Pan--Rorschach. So, the logical next step was to make another you."
"How is that a logical next step?" he sputtered, but Daniel wasn't listening.
"But..well, obviously, I did it wrong, because I meant to make an adult you. But instead, I made this tiny you."
He gestured to the child in question, a short, skinny boy with adorable red hair and freckles who was currently snoring gently on the couch.
"So, yeah...now we have this mini-Rorschach. But he's so cute! He looks like you, and he likes me to read him The New Frontiersmen before he goes to sleep at night, and---"
"Daniel, do you have any idea what I was like as a child? Burned boy's eye out with cigarette when TEN YEARS OLD. Was completely disturbed and fucked up."
"But this Rorschach won't be, because he'll have two daddies who love him very much! We'll make him cupcakes and sing to him and play pirates!"
Rorschach put his face in his hands, exasperated. "Not raising clone of myself. Not happening. Going now."
"But Panda Bear!" Daniel called out to him as he walked away. "How can you abandon him? Do you want him to have major daddy issues like you?"
That stopped Rorschach dead in his tracks. If Daniel really was hell-bent on raising this little clone (and it sounded like he was), he didn't want the kid to be all weird and miserable like he had been. There might be room for another Walter Kovacs in the world, but there sure as hell wasn't room for another Rorschach.
He turned around, looking at the little boy on the couch. He was wrapped up snugly in a fuzzy green blanket, and he looked very warm and cozy. He looked...happy.
Rorschach sighed. He really, really didn't want to create another fucked-up child. There were enough of those. And damnit, the kid looked just like him.
Well, no, not just like him. He looked how Rorschach might have looked if he never had become Rorschach, if he had been happy and safe and loved.
"Damnit. Fine. Will help you. But you owe me."
Daniel wiggled his eyebrows saucily. "Oh, don't worry...I'll pay you back. You won't regret this."
theguitarhero
+0 -0
You are so lucky I'm out of lames.
And I thought Snyder did a horrible job of adapting Watchmen .
You are so lucky I'm out of lames.
And I thought Snyder did a horrible job of adapting Watchmen .
missbee
+0 -0
Ahaha, it's not mine. And I happen to believe it's terrible. It just seemed to fit with the discussion.
Ahaha, it's not mine. And I happen to believe it's terrible. It just seemed to fit with the discussion.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
AH, ok.
AH, ok.
belgand
+0 -0
Terribly awesome, I believe. The way it gets everything wrong is just... astounding. It can't even entirely parody the characterization correctly. It is fabulous.
Terribly awesome, I believe. The way it gets everything wrong is just... astounding. It can't even entirely parody the characterization correctly. It is fabulous.
rowboat
+0 -0
I know very little about The Watchmen, but I know enough to understand why this is fucking hilarious.
I know very little about The Watchmen, but I know enough to understand why this is fucking hilarious.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Someone else posted that here, hahaha.
Someone else posted that here, hahaha.
rowboat
+0 -0
I guess that is to be expected.
I guess that is to be expected.
belgand
+0 -0
Hmm... I didn't see it and I wish I had because that was awesome. The bit with Rorshach and the dogs was probably my favorite. It's the little moments like that that really make it succeed.
Now do Watchmen Babies: V for Vacation! .
Hmm... I didn't see it and I wish I had because that was awesome. The bit with Rorshach and the dogs was probably my favorite. It's the little moments like that that really make it succeed.
Now do Watchmen Babies: V for Vacation! .
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
From Heck: The Story of Jack the Repairman
From Heck: The Story of Jack the Repairman
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Under a big pile of "classic" films on my DVD player (including Misery , Shawshank Redemption , and Johnny Mnemonic ) lies a movie known as From Hell that I got for 3 bucks (actually a lot of those movies are from the clearance pile at MovieStop, although most are from Christmas). Is it really as bad as people say it is?
Under a big pile of "classic" films on my DVD player (including Misery , Shawshank Redemption , and Johnny Mnemonic ) lies a movie known as From Hell that I got for 3 bucks (actually a lot of those movies are from the clearance pile at MovieStop, although most are from Christmas). Is it really as bad as people say it is?
tripleg
+0 -0
nah. it's just not as good as it could be.
nah. it's just not as good as it could be.
belgand
+0 -0
This is very true. Also most of the other films mentioned are definitely not classics and not necessarily worth watching.
It basically took a great novel that was about mysticism and the transition between the 19th and the 20th century and turned it into a fairly generic Jack the Ripper story. In the book the identity is never even remotely secret. You see him from before the murders even start and you see him committing all of them.
It's not bad it's just not particularly accurate to the book in theme or nature. Seriously though, read the comic, it's great.
This is very true. Also most of the other films mentioned are definitely not classics and not necessarily worth watching.
It basically took a great novel that was about mysticism and the transition between the 19th and the 20th century and turned it into a fairly generic Jack the Ripper story. In the book the identity is never even remotely secret. You see him from before the murders even start and you see him committing all of them.
It's not bad it's just not particularly accurate to the book in theme or nature. Seriously though, read the comic, it's great.
rowboat
+0 -0
Shawshank is worth watching. It shouldn't be lumped in with the others.
Shawshank is worth watching. It shouldn't be lumped in with the others.
belgand
+0 -0
It was OK, but I think I preferred the novella. It didn't really add much being filmed. I still wouldn't call it a classic and I preferred Misery if you forced me to choose.
I'm not big on uplifting stories that celebrate the human spirit. I'm more into, say, Requiem for a Dream where everyone gets fucked in the end. But I'm a pessimist.
It was OK, but I think I preferred the novella. It didn't really add much being filmed. I still wouldn't call it a classic and I preferred Misery if you forced me to choose.
I'm not big on uplifting stories that celebrate the human spirit. I'm more into, say, Requiem for a Dream where everyone gets fucked in the end. But I'm a pessimist.
rowboat
+0 -0
Yes, but it should be noted that the film and the novella are identical. That's impressive no matter what, but for a King adaptation to be so well handled is really without precedent.
Not to mention that it's just a damn good story. It's not mind-blowing or anything. It didn't change literature or Hollywood. It was just a good story. That's all I ask for.
Yes, but it should be noted that the film and the novella are identical. That's impressive no matter what, but for a King adaptation to be so well handled is really without precedent.
Not to mention that it's just a damn good story. It's not mind-blowing or anything. It didn't change literature or Hollywood. It was just a good story. That's all I ask for.
tripleg
+0 -0
Those men really did admire the hell out of each other.
Those men really did admire the hell out of each other.
belgand
+0 -0
Very true. It was a pretty damn solid adaptation. Likely because it was precisely the right length to be adapted and it was a basic sort of story.
For me it's the sort of movie that I might watch on cable if absolutely nothing else is on. This has not been an issue for many, many years now what with Tivo, DVDs, and such. Maybe if I'm away from home or something.
It's not worth intentionally watching. I put it in the same category that I also place Major League 2, Stay Tuned, Mom and Dad Save the World, and a host of other movies I saw maybe a half-dozen or more times simply because I grew up with HBO and Cinemax and would often be absorbed in something else or otherwise not change the channel between movies.
Very true. It was a pretty damn solid adaptation. Likely because it was precisely the right length to be adapted and it was a basic sort of story.
For me it's the sort of movie that I might watch on cable if absolutely nothing else is on. This has not been an issue for many, many years now what with Tivo, DVDs, and such. Maybe if I'm away from home or something.
It's not worth intentionally watching. I put it in the same category that I also place Major League 2, Stay Tuned, Mom and Dad Save the World, and a host of other movies I saw maybe a half-dozen or more times simply because I grew up with HBO and Cinemax and would often be absorbed in something else or otherwise not change the channel between movies.
belgand
+0 -0
If you're referencing the Repairman Jack series good for you. If not, get the fuck off my damn lawn!
If you're referencing the Repairman Jack series good for you. If not, get the fuck off my damn lawn!
stereo
+0 -0
Is the whole book uh... black and white? Cause I can't get my satisfaction from that.
Is the whole book uh... black and white? Cause I can't get my satisfaction from that.
belgand
+0 -0
Which book? Repairman Jack is a series of novels that I actually haven't read, but was recommended to me by a friend. My girlfriend owns the first in the series, but she has also not yet read it.
From Hell was illustrated entirely in black and white.
Which book? Repairman Jack is a series of novels that I actually haven't read, but was recommended to me by a friend. My girlfriend owns the first in the series, but she has also not yet read it.
From Hell was illustrated entirely in black and white.
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
I would recommend that those who haven't read Watchmen shouldn't watch the above, but those who have should.
I would recommend that those who haven't read Watchmen shouldn't watch the above, but those who have should.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Now that adaptation, that 's what I'm talking about. That's some talentuous interpretation right there.
Now that adaptation, that 's what I'm talking about. That's some talentuous interpretation right there.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
O...okay then, sir. Forgive my error and I shall be on my way.
O...okay then, sir. Forgive my error and I shall be on my way.
stereo
+0 -0
Rorschach skips talk and goes straight to beatings. Also fewer articles.
Rorschach skips talk and goes straight to beatings. Also fewer articles.
slodowy_slicer
+1 -0
...and I'll look down, and whisper "the hell you leave me alone."
...and I'll look down, and whisper "the hell you leave me alone."
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
Indeeed. "The hell I just [spoiler]"
also:
Lyle as The Comedian.
Pat as Adrian.
Teodor as Nite Owl.
Beef as Manhattan.
Todd as The Big Figure.
And Dr. Manflesh's fanfiction as Tales of the Black Freighter.
Indeeed. "The hell I just [spoiler]"
also:
Lyle as The Comedian.
Pat as Adrian.
Teodor as Nite Owl.
Beef as Manhattan.
Todd as The Big Figure.
And Dr. Manflesh's fanfiction as Tales of the Black Freighter.
slodowy_slicer
+0 -0
(and at first I thought Molly's personality didn't line up with Silk Spectre, but then I though about the "Spectre" part...)
(and at first I thought Molly's personality didn't line up with Silk Spectre, but then I though about the "Spectre" part...)
tripleg
+0 -0
you, sir, have blown my mind. also, phillipe as nite owl I?
you, sir, have blown my mind. also, phillipe as nite owl I?
whiteturtle
+7 -0
Phillipe is Rorshach.
The city is a whore, tread marks on dog's exploded stomach, HUUUUUUUGS
Phillipe is Rorshach.
The city is a whore, tread marks on dog's exploded stomach, HUUUUUUUGS
old_chap
+29 -0
Philippe in The Future kind of bears an emotional resemblance to Dr. Manhattan.
[IMGS OFF]
Philippe in The Future kind of bears an emotional resemblance to Dr. Manhattan.
[IMGS OFF]
ford
+0 -0
CHUBBY THIS MAN
CHUBBY THIS MAN
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yes everchomping visage of Bill Hicks.
Yes everchomping visage of Bill Hicks.
tekende
+0 -0
I chubbied him
I chubbied this man
I chubbied him
I chubbied this man
i_love_kate
+2 -0
Thank you so much for omitting the tiny blue ottercock.
Thank you so much for omitting the tiny blue ottercock.
plummet
+0 -0
oh god this times infinity
no pictures absolutely not there is none
oh god this times infinity
no pictures absolutely not there is none
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Daedala and I disagree. You must stay true to the source material
Daedala and I disagree. You must stay true to the source material
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Great avicon. Spanky is also always 5.
Great avicon. Spanky is also always 5.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
is that what The Watchmen was really like?
because to be quite honest that doesn't seem all that neo-noir or gritty
is that what The Watchmen was really like?
because to be quite honest that doesn't seem all that neo-noir or gritty
theguitarhero
+0 -0
No, not really.
No, not really.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
i don't know, now I'm convinced. A blue guy with a clearly and lovingly animated donkleman talking about butterflies against the backdrop of the f-u-t-u-r-e?
Call me old-fashioned, but I would've expected something less sexy out of the world's darkest, most exXxtreme comic book.
i don't know, now I'm convinced. A blue guy with a clearly and lovingly animated donkleman talking about butterflies against the backdrop of the f-u-t-u-r-e?
Call me old-fashioned, but I would've expected something less sexy out of the world's darkest, most exXxtreme comic book.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
to be fair, the second "X" is not capitalized in Watchmen: Exxxtreme.
Please don't build it up to be something it is not.
to be fair, the second "X" is not capitalized in Watchmen: Exxxtreme.
Please don't build it up to be something it is not.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Whiteturtle is selling it short, there is no E or treme in Watchmen, there is only XXX.
Oh wait, wrong Alan Moore book.
Whiteturtle is selling it short, there is no E or treme in Watchmen, there is only XXX.
Oh wait, wrong Alan Moore book.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
Lost Girls was pretty good, actually, pedoporn aside. Don't know how it will become a cult classic, but you can probably bet on it.
Lost Girls was pretty good, actually, pedoporn aside. Don't know how it will become a cult classic, but you can probably bet on it.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
What, so now this 'Alan Moore' fellow is ripping off fellow cult artist Henry Darger? Tut tut. Tut upon tut.
What, so now this 'Alan Moore' fellow is ripping off fellow cult artist Henry Darger? Tut tut. Tut upon tut.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Actually, and I think that I've commented on this before, but as he gets older his work is becoming more and more pornographic in nature. For shit's sake, he had a 1984 inspired Tijuana Bible in Black Dossier !
Not that I'm complaining as he is still a really good writer, it's just funny. You could hardly call V for Vendetta sexual (at least I wouldn't).
Actually, and I think that I've commented on this before, but as he gets older his work is becoming more and more pornographic in nature. For shit's sake, he had a 1984 inspired Tijuana Bible in Black Dossier !
Not that I'm complaining as he is still a really good writer, it's just funny. You could hardly call V for Vendetta sexual (at least I wouldn't).
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Julia all painting her face, Winston all stroking his rubber truncheon suggestively. O'Brian bursts in to arrest them halfway through, but joins in instead. Big Brother just watches.
Julia all painting her face, Winston all stroking his rubber truncheon suggestively. O'Brian bursts in to arrest them halfway through, but joins in instead. Big Brother just watches.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
SPOILER WARNING DO NOT READ THE POST ABOVE THIS ONE IF YOU HAVEN'T READ 1984
ALSO, READ 1984 IF YOU HAVEN'T READ 1984
SPOILER WARNING DO NOT READ THE POST ABOVE THIS ONE IF YOU HAVEN'T READ 1984
ALSO, READ 1984 IF YOU HAVEN'T READ 1984
belgand
+0 -0
Except that the Tijuana Bible was really well-done and a spot-on parody of the book. It was really more or less ideal. I'd think that that many other instances of sex and culture would be targeted. Of course, this goes back to the first series which also paid appropriate attention to sexual literature of the era as it was a relevant consideration.
Dude just isn't afraid to discuss the sexual underpinnings of our society. I've got no problem with that.
Lost Girls worked well as both classy porn and interesting commentary. Not my favorite Moore work by any stretch, but it was done well. It's biggest fault was only coming out in the super-expensive classy multi-volume slipcased hardcover.
Except that the Tijuana Bible was really well-done and a spot-on parody of the book. It was really more or less ideal. I'd think that that many other instances of sex and culture would be targeted. Of course, this goes back to the first series which also paid appropriate attention to sexual literature of the era as it was a relevant consideration.
Dude just isn't afraid to discuss the sexual underpinnings of our society. I've got no problem with that.
Lost Girls worked well as both classy porn and interesting commentary. Not my favorite Moore work by any stretch, but it was done well. It's biggest fault was only coming out in the super-expensive classy multi-volume slipcased hardcover.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
I didn't say he was doing a bad job of drawing porno, just that most of his recent work is saturated in sex. I'm fine with reading that but I like to read comic books wherever I go, so unfortunately The League has been relegated to bedtime reading when everyone else in the house is asleep.
I didn't say he was doing a bad job of drawing porno, just that most of his recent work is saturated in sex. I'm fine with reading that but I like to read comic books wherever I go, so unfortunately The League has been relegated to bedtime reading when everyone else in the house is asleep.
belgand
+0 -0
Weird. It seems like a normal amount of sex to me. Have you considered that you are just incredibly American and prudish?
Weird. It seems like a normal amount of sex to me. Have you considered that you are just incredibly American and prudish?
octafish
+0 -0
Agreed, you should catch a Tokyo train sometime.
Agreed, you should catch a Tokyo train sometime.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Well, it's more saturated with sex compared to the first League book and other stuff, I guess. I don't really care, I'm fairly healthy sexually and watched enough porn in my past to not care anymore about sexual images.
Well, it's more saturated with sex compared to the first League book and other stuff, I guess. I don't really care, I'm fairly healthy sexually and watched enough porn in my past to not care anymore about sexual images.
belgand
+0 -0
Yet that is exactly what I see you doing here. You care about people seeing you viewing sexual images in what I assume is a non-erotic manner. Specifically the Tijuana Bible in Black Dossier was a wonderful skewering of 1984 which really did try to push the idea that sex - not necessarily just love, but out-and-out and then probably in again sex - conquered all and was an expression of the indominability of the human spirit.
Going off onto a tangent I also recommend Down and Out in Paris and London . Not for some socialist reason, but simply because it is an interesting and enjoyable read. The idea that Britain required tramps to literally tramp around the country staying at different shelters each night just seems so very odd to me. It also caused me to hate the Salvation Army just a little bit more (and I do hate them quite a lot). If you ever see one of them soliciting donations and smoking be sure to call them on it as they are most explicitly not allowed to do that by the tenants of their weirdly militaristic religion.
Yet that is exactly what I see you doing here. You care about people seeing you viewing sexual images in what I assume is a non-erotic manner. Specifically the Tijuana Bible in Black Dossier was a wonderful skewering of 1984 which really did try to push the idea that sex - not necessarily just love, but out-and-out and then probably in again sex - conquered all and was an expression of the indominability of the human spirit.
Going off onto a tangent I also recommend Down and Out in Paris and London . Not for some socialist reason, but simply because it is an interesting and enjoyable read. The idea that Britain required tramps to literally tramp around the country staying at different shelters each night just seems so very odd to me. It also caused me to hate the Salvation Army just a little bit more (and I do hate them quite a lot). If you ever see one of them soliciting donations and smoking be sure to call them on it as they are most explicitly not allowed to do that by the tenants of their weirdly militaristic religion.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Oh well considering I still live with my mom for the time being, sorry that I don't necessarily want her to see me looking at two people fucking.
Oh well considering I still live with my mom for the time being, sorry that I don't necessarily want her to see me looking at two people fucking.
stereo
+0 -0
Your mom has seen more two people fucking than you'll ever know!
Your mom has seen more two people fucking than you'll ever know!
smilebuddha
+0 -0
You, sir, have done well.
You, sir, have done well.
rowboat
+0 -0
Seven months later, I'm gonna go ahead and officially label this excellent photoshop effort as Criminally Underchubbied.
Seven months later, I'm gonna go ahead and officially label this excellent photoshop effort as Criminally Underchubbied.
stereo
+0 -0
I think Cornelius is the first Nite Owl.
Philippe is that kid reading The Black Freighter .
"Where is the power outlet?"
Philippe is sitting on it
I think Cornelius is the first Nite Owl.
Philippe is that kid reading The Black Freighter .
"Where is the power outlet?"
Philippe is sitting on it
belgand
+0 -0
Beef I see more as Mothman, all nervous and broken inside.
Beef I see more as Mothman, all nervous and broken inside.
ntopp
+0 -0
Laughed long and loud at this one.
Laughed long and loud at this one.
gorrioncita
+3 -0
the cat leads a miserable life. he is estranged from his family and finds pleasure in nothing. it is his brutal burden to correct by means of violence and unrestrained anger a flawed world in which he can experience no true happiness. those who know him recognize him better by the aura of fury that surrounds him and follows in his wake than by his face or his smile.
the cat leads a miserable life. he is estranged from his family and finds pleasure in nothing. it is his brutal burden to correct by means of violence and unrestrained anger a flawed world in which he can experience no true happiness. those who know him recognize him better by the aura of fury that surrounds him and follows in his wake than by his face or his smile.
iwannacum
+2 -1
Correct. I wanna cum.
Correct. I wanna cum.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
You really will have to speak up.
You really will have to speak up.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
He wants to cum, woodenteeth.
He wants to cum.
He wants to cum, woodenteeth.
He wants to cum.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
However, he certainly does not want to cum wooden teeth.
However, he certainly does not want to cum wooden teeth.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
That would be painful!
That would be painful!
mattylite
+0 -0
I heard George Washington came wooden teeth.
I heard George Washington came wooden teeth.
wozzeck
+0 -0
George Washington came Liberty, and don't you forget it.
George Washington came Liberty, and don't you forget it.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
George Washington came American Flags.
George Washington came American Flags.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
George Washington came early this year.
George Washington came early this year.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
George Washington doesn't come on black people.
George Washington doesn't come on black people.
octafish
+0 -0
Who do you think you are kidding?
Who do you think you are kidding?
falseprophet
+0 -0
Yeah that would be Thomas Jefferson.
Yeah that would be Thomas Jefferson.
asherdan
+0 -0
Amidst all the grandness that is Ramses Luther Smuckles laying down his true path is the kernel of wistfulness that this pocket dial reveals more about his dad for Ray than anything else in his life so far.
Plus, great eyebrows in this one.
Amidst all the grandness that is Ramses Luther Smuckles laying down his true path is the kernel of wistfulness that this pocket dial reveals more about his dad for Ray than anything else in his life so far.
Plus, great eyebrows in this one.
i_love_kate
+0 -1
His emotions are so well-conveyed.
His emotions are so well-conveyed.
fancypants
+0 -1
the charlie chapman of cats
the charlie chapman of cats
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
What?
The Charlie Chapstick of walking into a room full of lips?
What?
The Charlie Chapstick of walking into a room full of lips?
irondave
+1 -0
Who the hell is Charlie Chapman?
Who the hell is Charlie Chapman?
fancypants
+0 -0
whoah.
chaplin. charles chaplin
whoah.
chaplin. charles chaplin
tekende
+0 -0
Hey guys, don't listen to belgand if he gives you travel tips or whatever. San Jose is pretty awesome.
Hey guys, don't listen to belgand if he gives you travel tips or whatever. San Jose is pretty awesome.
tekende
+0 -0
But uh do listen to him about smoking laws in California. I mean, if you want to know if there are any, not necessarily to his opinions about smoking laws.
But uh do listen to him about smoking laws in California. I mean, if you want to know if there are any, not necessarily to his opinions about smoking laws.
stereo
+0 -0
Summary of Belgand:
Facts: Useful
Opinions: Not Useful
Wait a minute, he sounds a lot like this guy I know...
Summary of Belgand:
Facts: Useful
Opinions: Not Useful
Wait a minute, he sounds a lot like this guy I know...
tekende
+0 -0
Well, to be fair, that summary could apply to almost everyone.
Anyway, I'd like to amend my first statement: Downtown San Jose is pretty awesome. This other part of San Jose I ended up in at one point last night? Not awesome.
Well, to be fair, that summary could apply to almost everyone.
Anyway, I'd like to amend my first statement: Downtown San Jose is pretty awesome. This other part of San Jose I ended up in at one point last night? Not awesome.
belgand
+0 -0
In all fairness I think I have spent maybe 15 minutes in San Jose itself. It's just the sort of thing where you never really see any need or reason to go there. It feels like the center of suburbs that exists solely so they have something a bit closer to be suburban to.
A shame I am too poor and lazy to take CalTrain down there or I would have stopped by to hang out. I still invite one and all to come by at some point in the future. There Will Be Merriment.
In all fairness I think I have spent maybe 15 minutes in San Jose itself. It's just the sort of thing where you never really see any need or reason to go there. It feels like the center of suburbs that exists solely so they have something a bit closer to be suburban to.
A shame I am too poor and lazy to take CalTrain down there or I would have stopped by to hang out. I still invite one and all to come by at some point in the future. There Will Be Merriment.
tripleg
+0 -0
The Sharks and The Improv are both pretty decent reasons to go there. The Tech Museum is also kind if interesting, although not really worth making the trip all on its own.
The Sharks and The Improv are both pretty decent reasons to go there. The Tech Museum is also kind if interesting, although not really worth making the trip all on its own.
belgand
+0 -0
I didn't realize they had sharks. I mean, aren't they more or less inland or do they have a tiny bit of the bay? I'd think there would be plenty of better places to go for sharks though.
The closest I would normally go is Great America (the one in Chicago looks better, but what would I know, I'm still basically afraid of roller coasters even after finally going on one a few years ago) and that's over in Santa Clara. It's weird though since going in it feels like it's just behind some office park. Not a typical place for an amusement park in my experience.
I didn't realize they had sharks. I mean, aren't they more or less inland or do they have a tiny bit of the bay? I'd think there would be plenty of better places to go for sharks though.
The closest I would normally go is Great America (the one in Chicago looks better, but what would I know, I'm still basically afraid of roller coasters even after finally going on one a few years ago) and that's over in Santa Clara. It's weird though since going in it feels like it's just behind some office park. Not a typical place for an amusement park in my experience.
tripleg
+0 -0
[img=https://www.svsemerchandise.com/client_stores/images/logo_sharks.gif] obviously you're not a golfer...
also, those office parks weren't there when they built it. where in the bay area are you?
[img=https://www.svsemerchandise.com/client_stores/images/logo_sharks.gif] obviously you're not a golfer...
also, those office parks weren't there when they built it. where in the bay area are you?
tripleg
+0 -0
fuck
[IMGS OFF]
fuck
[IMGS OFF]
belgand
+0 -0
You fuck sharks? Or do you mean that you wish to be gangbanged by an entire hockey time? Either way you are definitely a serious dude who certainly knows what he wants.
I have nothing but respect for someone who can take something like that on.
You fuck sharks? Or do you mean that you wish to be gangbanged by an entire hockey time? Either way you are definitely a serious dude who certainly knows what he wants.
I have nothing but respect for someone who can take something like that on.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Gangbanged by an entire time? Is....does that hurt?
Gangbanged by an entire time? Is....does that hurt?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
HOCKEY TIME BETCHES.
y'all ready for this? do do do do do, do dodododo, do do.
HOCKEY TIME BETCHES.
y'all ready for this? do do do do do, do dodododo, do do.
tripleg
+0 -0
only if they use their sticks.
only if they use their sticks.
belgand
+0 -0
Well, he'll have three periods in sixty minutes... sounds like that would hurt to me, but I'm not a man who menstruates so I'm probably not the one to be asking here.
Well, he'll have three periods in sixty minutes... sounds like that would hurt to me, but I'm not a man who menstruates so I'm probably not the one to be asking here.
mattylite
+1 -0
I agree completely: Fuck the sharks.
Go Bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuesss (P.S. I don't care about hockey, just about sneaking in a hipper of rum and gettin' a little rowdy when the Red Wings are in town)
I agree completely: Fuck the sharks.
Go Bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuesss (P.S. I don't care about hockey, just about sneaking in a hipper of rum and gettin' a little rowdy when the Red Wings are in town)
octafish
+0 -0
Yeah fuck the Sharks, Jets rule. When you're a Jet you're a Jet all the way, from your first cigarette to your last dying day.
Yeah fuck the Sharks, Jets rule. When you're a Jet you're a Jet all the way, from your first cigarette to your last dying day.
belgand
+1 -0
What about a shark with a jet?
[IMGS OFF]
God, mankind is fucked !
What about a shark with a jet?
[IMGS OFF]
God, mankind is fucked !
mattylite
+0 -0
It... it's Beautiful .
It... it's Beautiful .
belgand
+0 -0
Somehow Adult Swim viewers proved themselves to be wrong and, in a landslide, voted that the Flying Crocodile (which had lame, feathery wings) would win in a fight.
I remember a one-week promotion on late-night cartoon bumpers designed to mock a Shark Week event that occurred five years ago. It is because the results were clearly wrong.
Somehow Adult Swim viewers proved themselves to be wrong and, in a landslide, voted that the Flying Crocodile (which had lame, feathery wings) would win in a fight.
I remember a one-week promotion on late-night cartoon bumpers designed to mock a Shark Week event that occurred five years ago. It is because the results were clearly wrong.
belgand
+0 -0
San Francisco. Bay Area? You mean the hangers-on out in the sticks? I rarely use the term as I am loathe to actually leave the city.
Frankly, I knew what you were talking about, but I just plain hate sports.
San Francisco. Bay Area? You mean the hangers-on out in the sticks? I rarely use the term as I am loathe to actually leave the city.
Frankly, I knew what you were talking about, but I just plain hate sports.
plummet
+1 -1
[IMGS OFF]
Old Snake's got some competition in the field here
[IMGS OFF]
Old Snake's got some competition in the field here
falseprophet
+1 -1
They have so much in common but they are total opposites.
Snake's badassery is cunning, acute, and invisible.
Ramses Luther has a seven-mile destruction radius around him at all times.
They have so much in common but they are total opposites.
Snake's badassery is cunning, acute, and invisible.
Ramses Luther has a seven-mile destruction radius around him at all times.
plummet
+0 -0
Solid has the gumption to hide his powerlevel on occasion, as well.
Solid has the gumption to hide his powerlevel on occasion, as well.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Otherwise, it's over 9000
Otherwise, it's over 9000
theguitarhero
+5 -0
O...OVER 9000?!!!
O...OVER 9000?!!!
whiteturtle
+0 -0
Ramses will have to stand perfectly still for 12 episodes while the very spirit of the earth forms into a ball of ass-kicking over his head. No less than 12 episodes.
"AAAAAAA...SNAKE...CANNOT WIN...UNIVERSAL...DANGER!!!"
Ramses will have to stand perfectly still for 12 episodes while the very spirit of the earth forms into a ball of ass-kicking over his head. No less than 12 episodes.
"AAAAAAA...SNAKE...CANNOT WIN...UNIVERSAL...DANGER!!!"
octafish
+0 -0
So old Snake is just SOF's John Mullins with elf ears?
So old Snake is just SOF's John Mullins with elf ears?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
And the circle completes itself, as David Hayter wrote the script for Watchmen .
And the circle completes itself, as David Hayter wrote the script for Watchmen .
gorrioncita
+3 -0
this furious cat represents the desire of anger to be effective by its own virtue. as adolescents, for example, we rage, earnestly believing that our rage should manifest itself tangibly in the form of a correction of the circumstances that produced it. this cat is what rage believes itself to be before the honest shock of the realization of its own overwhelming, foolish impotence.
this furious cat represents the desire of anger to be effective by its own virtue. as adolescents, for example, we rage, earnestly believing that our rage should manifest itself tangibly in the form of a correction of the circumstances that produced it. this cat is what rage believes itself to be before the honest shock of the realization of its own overwhelming, foolish impotence.
irondave
+0 -0
Wow, you just made me realize how extended was my adolesence.
Wow, you just made me realize how extended was my adolesence.
gorrioncita
+0 -0
i am here to EDUCATE. . ?
i am here to EDUCATE. . ?
tbtabby
+0 -0
Just think what he'd do to that "Guess who it is? It's your butt!" woman.
Just think what he'd do to that "Guess who it is? It's your butt!" woman.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
The HELL it is my butt.
The HELL it is my butt.
tekende
+0 -0
"Woman you should be glad even my butt is giving you the time it takes to call. Now go get me my dinner."
"Woman you should be glad even my butt is giving you the time it takes to call. Now go get me my dinner."
bixschmix
+0 -0
Every time I see that commercial, I want to strangle that woman and possibly lock her in a shed so she will never, ever speak to me again.
Every time I see that commercial, I want to strangle that woman and possibly lock her in a shed so she will never, ever speak to me again.
tripleg
+0 -0
i love that commercial. love it.
i love that commercial. love it.
tekende
+0 -0
I feel that the man gets unnecessarily defensive about the issue.
I feel that the man gets unnecessarily defensive about the issue.
sje46
+0 -0
Remember that sje guy? Wasn't he awesome?
Remember that sje guy? Wasn't he awesome?
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Vaguely. All I can remember is something about him being 5. Always 5. It's a mystery.
Vaguely. All I can remember is something about him being 5. Always 5. It's a mystery.
plummet
+0 -0
I heard he hates music
I heard he hates music
catgrl131
+0 -0
I heard he was weaned on chicken milk and cocaine .
I heard he was weaned on chicken milk and cocaine .
sje46
+0 -0
All of this is true.
This is the legend of sje46.
All of this is true.
This is the legend of sje46.
catgrl131
+0 -0
I heard the 46 in his name stand for the number of lovers he's killed in cold blood.
I heard the 46 in his name stand for the number of lovers he's killed in cold blood.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I heard he didn't even Love any of them!
I heard he didn't even Love any of them!
belgand
+0 -0
I heard he'll hug just about anyone.
I heard he'll hug just about anyone.
everything
+0 -1
It's monday
5 am
I chowed down on
chocolate & almond candy, then tried to go to sleep.
didn't work.
I sort of dozed a little I guess.
so
here I am
contemplating fairly universal concepts, in the context of my own fairly
proprietary self and situation and station
resisting the temptation to and the habit of thinking on a low level... AP
articles in a newspaper... fragments of a greater world... all my thoughts...
fragments of.... myself? No... not really. false in both instances. The whole
is greater than the fragments... if I am only fragments, then ... am I?
Answer: No. But there is still a me, so far anyway, a me somewhere in the
center of it all... quite a mystery how I happened and what I happen to be, but
I guess I did and I am. A fundamental sort of me. And then
there
is
the ...
you know... the peripheral me... While I can't speculate on the fundamental
me, (all I know is I have a sort of impression
that I'm there, and constant
and sentient and apparently oddly enough well rounded... well...) I can say that
the peripheral me, all fragmented and such, is, well, not too impressive, and
well on it's way to becoming a small and ignorant person. And then...
foomp... it happens... the peripheral you takes over for the internal you, and
then, you are, for all intents and purposes, a waste of carbon.
that's it then. I'm not sure what it will be like, and how completely
I will realize it, or even how much fun it will be (fun... funny how I throw
that out there... a sort of universal reference point of a unilateral base need
and desire... a metric by which all meaning is quantified... a bottomless pit in
the shallow superficie of the soul...) but I am sure...
sure
that it
is what
I
must do, even if I'm not sure that I can... So yes, no more endless
contemplation of the infinite, no more losing myself in the
infinite maze of
chaos of low-level complexity... entropy beckons, calls out my name from all
directions, and I must find the opposite direction, I must double back.
hmmm
okay then. in other words, embracing high level concepts... is what I shall
do... am already starting to... and it's neat, man... It is changing my
dreams... I have like, normal dreams again... and when I close my eyes, I can
visualize things I couldn't before... because I am seeing things that I
didn't before... literally.... when I look at a photo, or a person's
face... and I can't draw... but maybe that will change too...
so I had some chocolate milk. maybe that'll make me sleep.
I'm hoping the caulk in the shower dries in time for me to take a
shower
tomorrow... at this
rate it
won't...
we got another squirrel today in the trap in the attic... squirrel # 2... I
wired a sensor to the trap so I can tell from the
basement when it has closed.
We released the squirrel somewhere far enough away he won't find his way
back hopefully.
I installed a new door knob in their bathroom door... the old one broke... they had this old-style
cartridge lock ... you've seen them... so I removed the door knobs and the
cartridge, left the metal face plates on either side, filled it with foam, and
put the new door knob above it. drilled out a hole and all for it. fun stuff.
working with wood is always nice.
It's monday
5 am
I chowed down on
chocolate & almond candy, then tried to go to sleep.
didn't work.
I sort of dozed a little I guess.
so
here I am
contemplating fairly universal concepts, in the context of my own fairly
proprietary self and situation and station
resisting the temptation to and the habit of thinking on a low level... AP
articles in a newspaper... fragments of a greater world... all my thoughts...
fragments of.... myself? No... not really. false in both instances. The whole
is greater than the fragments... if I am only fragments, then ... am I?
Answer: No. But there is still a me, so far anyway, a me somewhere in the
center of it all... quite a mystery how I happened and what I happen to be, but
I guess I did and I am. A fundamental sort of me. And then
there
is
the ...
you know... the peripheral me... While I can't speculate on the fundamental
me, (all I know is I have a sort of impression
that I'm there, and constant
and sentient and apparently oddly enough well rounded... well...) I can say that
the peripheral me, all fragmented and such, is, well, not too impressive, and
well on it's way to becoming a small and ignorant person. And then...
foomp... it happens... the peripheral you takes over for the internal you, and
then, you are, for all intents and purposes, a waste of carbon.
that's it then. I'm not sure what it will be like, and how completely
I will realize it, or even how much fun it will be (fun... funny how I throw
that out there... a sort of universal reference point of a unilateral base need
and desire... a metric by which all meaning is quantified... a bottomless pit in
the shallow superficie of the soul...) but I am sure...
sure
that it
is what
I
must do, even if I'm not sure that I can... So yes, no more endless
contemplation of the infinite, no more losing myself in the
infinite maze of
chaos of low-level complexity... entropy beckons, calls out my name from all
directions, and I must find the opposite direction, I must double back.
hmmm
okay then. in other words, embracing high level concepts... is what I shall
do... am already starting to... and it's neat, man... It is changing my
dreams... I have like, normal dreams again... and when I close my eyes, I can
visualize things I couldn't before... because I am seeing things that I
didn't before... literally.... when I look at a photo, or a person's
face... and I can't draw... but maybe that will change too...
so I had some chocolate milk. maybe that'll make me sleep.
I'm hoping the caulk in the shower dries in time for me to take a
shower
tomorrow... at this
rate it
won't...
we got another squirrel today in the trap in the attic... squirrel # 2... I
wired a sensor to the trap so I can tell from the
basement when it has closed.
We released the squirrel somewhere far enough away he won't find his way
back hopefully.
I installed a new door knob in their bathroom door... the old one broke... they had this old-style
cartridge lock ... you've seen them... so I removed the door knobs and the
cartridge, left the metal face plates on either side, filled it with foam, and
put the new door knob above it. drilled out a hole and all for it. fun stuff.
working with wood is always nice.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
line breaks huh? wow. can you call yourself a poet yet?
line breaks huh? wow. can you call yourself a poet yet?
everything
+0 -0
yeah... don't ask me about the line feeds... this text is from a replied-to copy of an e-mail I wrote exactly one week previously. The e-mail programs involved somehow added in those line feeds, using what logic I do not know, which in any case adds nicely to the non sequitur character of the prose.
...And I am guessing from the response that non-sequitur babble is not everyone's cup of tea here.
This passage is actually expressive of genuine and coherent introspection, although, as far as this expression it's self is concerned, it is obviously pedantic, idiosyncratic, and atypical in it's use of whatever the written-language equivalent of or analog to prosody would be called.
As for speculation that I'm ManFlesh, AIU Snick Stereo, GuitarHero, etc. I am none of them. I'm just myself. so hello everyone. Sorry for the megalomaniac user name. it's not really intended like that. It's just a word I have liked since I heard it in a Lauryn Hill song... 'everything is everything...'
I found this strip to be sad. It seems to portray this sense that there is so much time in our lives that we spend alone, disconnected from others, immersed in our struggle with the world, time ticking forward, an accidentally overheard phone call providing more human connection with someone than anything we deliberately do all day, week, or possibly even all year. These are the moments we are supposed to experience when we discover after someone is now decades older or has passed, some long-forgotten tape recording of that person.. and yet, more and more often we are experiencing these moments in the here and now... that awkward accidentally mis-dialed call from the now ex-girl friend, that distance and melancholy that envelopes you as you browse your ex's myspace page.. you're not talking anymore... your lives have gone different directions, and yet, here is this photo album of this life the two of you never quite experienced together, yet in a one-sided sort of way, sort of are... like some kind of quantum phenomenon, observing it, knowing that to actually reach out and contact him or her would change the experience. This is the strange reality we are creating for ourselves, a sort of interweaving of parallel universes that never could have nor would have existed without this ubiquitous cybernetic infusion of media, this searing integration of this media into the flesh of our psyches... I'm not sure which it is, maybe it's both... either life is imitating art "look at me, I'm in the surreal realm of Achewood USA" or art is, in this particular strip anyway, succumbing to life... 'look at Ray... he's Human...'
yeah... don't ask me about the line feeds... this text is from a replied-to copy of an e-mail I wrote exactly one week previously. The e-mail programs involved somehow added in those line feeds, using what logic I do not know, which in any case adds nicely to the non sequitur character of the prose.
...And I am guessing from the response that non-sequitur babble is not everyone's cup of tea here.
This passage is actually expressive of genuine and coherent introspection, although, as far as this expression it's self is concerned, it is obviously pedantic, idiosyncratic, and atypical in it's use of whatever the written-language equivalent of or analog to prosody would be called.
As for speculation that I'm ManFlesh, AIU Snick Stereo, GuitarHero, etc. I am none of them. I'm just myself. so hello everyone. Sorry for the megalomaniac user name. it's not really intended like that. It's just a word I have liked since I heard it in a Lauryn Hill song... 'everything is everything...'
I found this strip to be sad. It seems to portray this sense that there is so much time in our lives that we spend alone, disconnected from others, immersed in our struggle with the world, time ticking forward, an accidentally overheard phone call providing more human connection with someone than anything we deliberately do all day, week, or possibly even all year. These are the moments we are supposed to experience when we discover after someone is now decades older or has passed, some long-forgotten tape recording of that person.. and yet, more and more often we are experiencing these moments in the here and now... that awkward accidentally mis-dialed call from the now ex-girl friend, that distance and melancholy that envelopes you as you browse your ex's myspace page.. you're not talking anymore... your lives have gone different directions, and yet, here is this photo album of this life the two of you never quite experienced together, yet in a one-sided sort of way, sort of are... like some kind of quantum phenomenon, observing it, knowing that to actually reach out and contact him or her would change the experience. This is the strange reality we are creating for ourselves, a sort of interweaving of parallel universes that never could have nor would have existed without this ubiquitous cybernetic infusion of media, this searing integration of this media into the flesh of our psyches... I'm not sure which it is, maybe it's both... either life is imitating art "look at me, I'm in the surreal realm of Achewood USA" or art is, in this particular strip anyway, succumbing to life... 'look at Ray... he's Human...'
sje46
+0 -0
Totally AIU.
Totally AIU.
sje46
+0 -0
(I say this as a joke. You are too coherent to be AIU)
(I say this as a joke. You are too coherent to be AIU)
stereo
+0 -0
Who else uses the "old, Female" and granny avatar?
Who else uses the "old, Female" and granny avatar?
octafish
+0 -0
Estelle Getty?
Estelle Getty?
hamscout
+0 -0
Only if she's doing it from the other side , my friend...
>Pours out a bottle of Ensure<
Only if she's doing it from the other side , my friend...
>Pours out a bottle of Ensure<
sje46
+0 -0
I lolled.
I lolled.
rowboat
+0 -0
I like to think about which one of us this actually is.
I like to think about which one of us this actually is.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
long-windedness plus non-sequiterness equals Dr. Manflesh.
long-windedness plus non-sequiterness equals Dr. Manflesh.
stereo
+0 -0
I think aiu promised to come back at some point, and asked not to be ignored to oblivion this time.
I think aiu promised to come back at some point, and asked not to be ignored to oblivion this time.
rowboat
+0 -0
OK. So that narrows it down to either theguitarhero or stereo.
OK. So that narrows it down to either theguitarhero or stereo.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
hey, I am not aiu, and I suck at bizarre post-modern-lite poetry so there you go.
hey, I am not aiu, and I suck at bizarre post-modern-lite poetry so there you go.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
First thing I thought was that it was so much the opposite of him that it had to be him, then decided that it was too outlandish to start guessing, so I verbosed on how I didn't like the style, but since we're now conjecturing -
my money's on (whoever's behind) Glad
First thing I thought was that it was so much the opposite of him that it had to be him, then decided that it was too outlandish to start guessing, so I verbosed on how I didn't like the style, but since we're now conjecturing -
my money's on (whoever's behind) Glad
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
It's somehow comforting to see that someone can create an assetbar account just so that this can be posted. That sort of incongruous effort would make the broken prose and impossible conceit worthwhile if it wasn't for the fact that someone came up with the whole "troll" thing before.
It's somehow comforting to see that someone can create an assetbar account just so that this can be posted. That sort of incongruous effort would make the broken prose and impossible conceit worthwhile if it wasn't for the fact that someone came up with the whole "troll" thing before.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Forgive my sesquipedalian self for saying this, but:
TL;DR.
Forgive my sesquipedalian self for saying this, but:
TL;DR.
octafish
+0 -0
So do you think Onstad has the Story of Lyle done or will he miss another self imposed deadline? I guess we'll have to check back and see.
So do you think Onstad has the Story of Lyle done or will he miss another self imposed deadline? I guess we'll have to check back and see.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Tune in tommorow for "Broken Promises and Crying Fanboys".
Tune in tommorow for "Broken Promises and Crying Fanboys".
stereo
+0 -0
Three part harmony, scored for the zither.
Three part harmony, scored for the zither.
plummet
+0 -0
worst song, played on ugliest guitar
worst song, played on ugliest guitar
theguitarhero
+0 -0
He even missed that deadline, "Broken Promises and Crying Fanboys" aired last Friday.
He even missed that deadline, "Broken Promises and Crying Fanboys" aired last Friday.
fermatprime
+0 -1
Oh yeah, I saw that. Yeah, the sudden revelation that there was a sixth Final Cylon was hell of cheap.
Oh yeah, I saw that. Yeah, the sudden revelation that there was a sixth Final Cylon was hell of cheap.
fermatprime
+0 -1
(Note: I do not watch BSG and am, in fact, talking out my ass.)
(Note: I do not watch BSG and am, in fact, talking out my ass.)
theguitarhero
+0 -0
You bet your fucking ass you are. Tard.
I was talking Watchmen , or as it was known on the internet, Everyone Bitch All Weekend About Hollywood and A Big Blue Penis .
You bet your fucking ass you are. Tard.
I was talking Watchmen , or as it was known on the internet, Everyone Bitch All Weekend About Hollywood and A Big Blue Penis .
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Seriously though, you had me scared that there was some secret episode of BSG I missed. You almost made me kill myself!
Seriously though, you had me scared that there was some secret episode of BSG I missed. You almost made me kill myself!
whiteturtle
+4 -0
Theguitarhero closes his laptop with a final click. Dust motes tumble across the one beam of daylight that peeks through the his room's thick black curtains.
The beam illuminates a poster on the wall of President Laura Roslin, photoshopped into entertaining a non-standard number of sexual partners. He did the photoshop himself, and had Kinko's blow it up shortly after the episode where Roslin and Adama smoked pot on the grass of New Caprica together. There was something alluring about the idea of sharing a little home with the president of the remainder of humanity, in space. There was something alluring about imagining her having sex with a bunch of dudes, too.
While masturbating himself to sleep after bringing the poster home, TGH had made a silent promise to the Gods: he would never miss an episode from that moment on, and in return they would grant him his dream of a little house with the President, in space.
Fermatprime's comment had pierced his heart like so much frakking shrapnel. He had failed. He would never be with his beloved Laura. He would never get to stroke her bald but now recovering chemotherapy head in space, in their little house.
No time. No time to verify. Only one way to prove his devotion. Surely the Gods would understand his mistake and accept his penance. Surely they would grant him mercy and TGH would wake up aboard a resurrection strip, gasping for air in the fetal goo a new life, a life finally filled with people who understood him. And robots.
As he reached for the gun he kept beneath his full-sized Centurion head, complete with LCD eyes and everything, his hand bumped his desk brining his desktop pc to life. It opened to the Sci-Fi channel homepage, as always.
"Oh thank gods," he said.
The home page had a list of all the recent episodes, and he had missed none of them. Theguitarhero reopened his laptop and masturbated himself to sleep.
Theguitarhero closes his laptop with a final click. Dust motes tumble across the one beam of daylight that peeks through the his room's thick black curtains.
The beam illuminates a poster on the wall of President Laura Roslin, photoshopped into entertaining a non-standard number of sexual partners. He did the photoshop himself, and had Kinko's blow it up shortly after the episode where Roslin and Adama smoked pot on the grass of New Caprica together. There was something alluring about the idea of sharing a little home with the president of the remainder of humanity, in space. There was something alluring about imagining her having sex with a bunch of dudes, too.
While masturbating himself to sleep after bringing the poster home, TGH had made a silent promise to the Gods: he would never miss an episode from that moment on, and in return they would grant him his dream of a little house with the President, in space.
Fermatprime's comment had pierced his heart like so much frakking shrapnel. He had failed. He would never be with his beloved Laura. He would never get to stroke her bald but now recovering chemotherapy head in space, in their little house.
No time. No time to verify. Only one way to prove his devotion. Surely the Gods would understand his mistake and accept his penance. Surely they would grant him mercy and TGH would wake up aboard a resurrection strip, gasping for air in the fetal goo a new life, a life finally filled with people who understood him. And robots.
As he reached for the gun he kept beneath his full-sized Centurion head, complete with LCD eyes and everything, his hand bumped his desk brining his desktop pc to life. It opened to the Sci-Fi channel homepage, as always.
"Oh thank gods," he said.
The home page had a list of all the recent episodes, and he had missed none of them. Theguitarhero reopened his laptop and masturbated himself to sleep.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Correct up to the point where you described Roslin as "recovering". She is not recovering, last Friday's episode showed her as weaker and frailer than before, mayhaps she is dying with Galactica?
Anyway, major chubs even though you wrote me as some kind of chronically masturbating freak.
Correct up to the point where you described Roslin as "recovering". She is not recovering, last Friday's episode showed her as weaker and frailer than before, mayhaps she is dying with Galactica?
Anyway, major chubs even though you wrote me as some kind of chronically masturbating freak.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
In order for your fantasy to work, the gods would save her life. But, yeah, she is totally going to die.
In order for your fantasy to work, the gods would save her life. But, yeah, she is totally going to die.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Well Adama is totally going to crash Galactica into the Colony, either that or fly very close into the Colony and then warp away, ripping out the Colony from the inside.
Well Adama is totally going to crash Galactica into the Colony, either that or fly very close into the Colony and then warp away, ripping out the Colony from the inside.
octafish
+2 -0
Its too bad she won't live. But then again who does?
Its too bad she won't live. But then again who does?
stereo
+0 -0
What is this, clever fanfic day? Did I miss another memo? :(
What is this, clever fanfic day? Did I miss another memo? :(
mattylite
+0 -0
You are on the achewood boards and stereo does a :(
etc.
You are on the achewood boards and stereo does a :(
etc.
belgand
+0 -0
Roslin is just space Palin. I have no time for her.
I still think Baltar is unfairly persecuted. The whole deal with New Caprica was totally not his fault. He was no longer in control when things went to shit and everyone just blames him regardless.
Both Adama and Roslin are frequently scary conservative pricks and sometimes I can't tell whether the show is endorsing a sort of pro-Bush agenda or whether it's trying to comment on it negatively. It straddles the line a bit too often.
Roslin is just space Palin. I have no time for her.
I still think Baltar is unfairly persecuted. The whole deal with New Caprica was totally not his fault. He was no longer in control when things went to shit and everyone just blames him regardless.
Both Adama and Roslin are frequently scary conservative pricks and sometimes I can't tell whether the show is endorsing a sort of pro-Bush agenda or whether it's trying to comment on it negatively. It straddles the line a bit too often.
aperson
+0 -0
controversial
controversial
wozzeck
+0 -0
Belgand is worried that relating to the wrong television characters may cause him to commit thoughtcrime.
Belgand is worried that relating to the wrong television characters may cause him to commit thoughtcrime.
belgand
+0 -0
No, Belgand dislikes that television characters are vicious assholes who seem to believe that they are above both law and democratic process.
I'm just saying that when it comes to
[IMGS OFF]
I'm supporting Baltar. Hippie sex cult with attractive ladies or being a dick to people all the damn time and trying to push people out of airlocks and keep them imprisoned for what are often political reasons? Not much of a choice really.
No, Belgand dislikes that television characters are vicious assholes who seem to believe that they are above both law and democratic process.
I'm just saying that when it comes to
[IMGS OFF]
I'm supporting Baltar. Hippie sex cult with attractive ladies or being a dick to people all the damn time and trying to push people out of airlocks and keep them imprisoned for what are often political reasons? Not much of a choice really.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
While I agree that most of the Humans in BSG are seemingly overly conservative, think of what they've been through. They've watched their entire race be decimated by robot slaves. They've all resorted to doing bad things on New Caprica, and I think a lot of Baltar's guilt for his actions died with Gaeta.
Frankly, Adama and Roslin have every right to be conservative but they aren't AS conservative as some of the people on the Battlestar.
Roslin definitely is not Palin though. She is way smarter and a better rounded character.
While I agree that most of the Humans in BSG are seemingly overly conservative, think of what they've been through. They've watched their entire race be decimated by robot slaves. They've all resorted to doing bad things on New Caprica, and I think a lot of Baltar's guilt for his actions died with Gaeta.
Frankly, Adama and Roslin have every right to be conservative but they aren't AS conservative as some of the people on the Battlestar.
Roslin definitely is not Palin though. She is way smarter and a better rounded character.
rowboat
+0 -0
Ya'll some science fiction fans.
Ya'll some science fiction fans.
telescreen
+0 -0
I have no idea what you are talking about, but I just loved reading that a fictional person was smarter and a better rounded character than a real one.
And of course it's probably true.
I have no idea what you are talking about, but I just loved reading that a fictional person was smarter and a better rounded character than a real one.
And of course it's probably true.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yeah, because fictional characters have to be written in a way to make them appealing to the people watching the show, and unfortunately real people do not have that limitation.
Yeah, because fictional characters have to be written in a way to make them appealing to the people watching the show, and unfortunately real people do not have that limitation.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Sometimes politicians definitely do.
Sometimes politicians definitely do.
belgand
+0 -0
You don't have every right to start rigging elections and throwing people out of airlocks. Nor do you get to throw people in prison and torture them as often as they both seem to want to do.
I'll agree that Roslin is both smarter and better rounded (though you could say the same thing about a cinder block), but she's still a minor government official that suddenly was thrust into a position of prominence that she is entirely unprepared for and responds with surprisingly conservative tactics that I think Palin would heartily endorse. It's not a perfect comparison, but it works for me as well as Adama '08.
My issue with Baltar wasn't about guilt, but that bullshit trial and such. He did nothing wrong on New Caprica and they're just looking for a scapegoat.
Roslin was pretty good in Sneakers though, let's talk about that.
You don't have every right to start rigging elections and throwing people out of airlocks. Nor do you get to throw people in prison and torture them as often as they both seem to want to do.
I'll agree that Roslin is both smarter and better rounded (though you could say the same thing about a cinder block), but she's still a minor government official that suddenly was thrust into a position of prominence that she is entirely unprepared for and responds with surprisingly conservative tactics that I think Palin would heartily endorse. It's not a perfect comparison, but it works for me as well as Adama '08.
My issue with Baltar wasn't about guilt, but that bullshit trial and such. He did nothing wrong on New Caprica and they're just looking for a scapegoat.
Roslin was pretty good in Sneakers though, let's talk about that.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
The VP wanted to overthrow the entire government, killed the entire Quorum in cold blood and almost got Galactica blown up, all because Adama wanted to fix the Battlestar. Roslin is way less conservative than him.
The VP wanted to overthrow the entire government, killed the entire Quorum in cold blood and almost got Galactica blown up, all because Adama wanted to fix the Battlestar. Roslin is way less conservative than him.
fermatprime
+1 -0
OH GODS NO TGH I WAS TRYING TO ERASE THE MEMORIES OF THE INTERNETS FROM MY MIIIIIIIIND
Although it did give us this gem , which you've probably seen, but I dunno maybe not?
OH GODS NO TGH I WAS TRYING TO ERASE THE MEMORIES OF THE INTERNETS FROM MY MIIIIIIIIND
Although it did give us this gem , which you've probably seen, but I dunno maybe not?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yes. Love it.
Yes. Love it.
belgand
+0 -0
Thank you. Some of us are just letting it build up on the Tivo for various reasons and still haven't finished the first half of the current season.
Thank you. Some of us are just letting it build up on the Tivo for various reasons and still haven't finished the first half of the current season.
plummet
+0 -0
Yo I think we're fucked
it's almost tuesday
Yo I think we're fucked
it's almost tuesday
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Everyone knows Late Monday actually means Early Tuesday.
Everyone knows Late Monday actually means Early Tuesday.
catgrl131
+0 -0
Tomorrow's recipe is chicken.
Tomorrow's recipe is chicken.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
We continue the story arc about the magic underwear tomorrow.
We continue the story arc about the magic underwear tomorrow.
stereo
+0 -0
Tomorrow, we find out where Ray's banjo took Pat .
This story was unfortunately interrupted by the birth of a child, which has now been eliminated.
Tomorrow, we find out where Ray's banjo took Pat .
This story was unfortunately interrupted by the birth of a child, which has now been eliminated.
stereo
+0 -0
He reappeared in the support group 4 months later, so something obviously happened.
He reappeared in the support group 4 months later, so something obviously happened.
rowboat
+0 -0
And Teodor finally figures out that drum machine.
And Teodor finally figures out that drum machine.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Slumming, strumming, bumming down the boulevard of broken dreams-
Down to the beach that's just out of reach
of your vision-
pocket-fishin',
noxious emission...
Banjocopalypse!
Carazy, mannnnn.......
pop-twanggggggggg!
Slumming, strumming, bumming down the boulevard of broken dreams-
Down to the beach that's just out of reach
of your vision-
pocket-fishin',
noxious emission...
Banjocopalypse!
Carazy, mannnnn.......
pop-twanggggggggg!
crunky
+0 -1
why don't you people take up a collection and get a life?
why don't you people take up a collection and get a life?
plummet
+0 -0
why don't you eat a bowl of dicks, crunky
why don't you eat a bowl of dicks, crunky
whiteturtle
+1 -0
he already ate so many dick that he is full.
He moves and is uncomfortable. Drinks some water but is uncomfortable til the late afternoon.
Because of how many dicks he ate already.
he already ate so many dick that he is full.
He moves and is uncomfortable. Drinks some water but is uncomfortable til the late afternoon.
Because of how many dicks he ate already.
sje46
+0 -0
DO you mean, like, eat all the dicks in the bowl individually, or do you mean eat the bowl itself?
DO you mean, like, eat all the dicks in the bowl individually, or do you mean eat the bowl itself?
sje46
+0 -0
I'm sorry, what was that?
I was too busy fapping to hentai porn.
I'm sorry, what was that?
I was too busy fapping to hentai porn.
sje46
+0 -0
It's funny because "hentai porn" is a oxymoron. Everyone knows that you can't get a woody to a cartoon . . .no way . . .heh.
It's funny because "hentai porn" is a oxymoron. Everyone knows that you can't get a woody to a cartoon . . .no way . . .heh.
stereo
+0 -0
Uncle woody stopped visiting me because I watched too much hentai
Uncle woody stopped visiting me because I watched too much hentai
tragicone
+0 -0
I should call my dad.
I should call my dad.
theguitarhero
+1 -0
What's your dad like?
I wanna meet your dad.
What's your dad like?
I wanna meet your dad.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Can't stop thinking about your dad.
Can't stop thinking about your dad.
tragicone
+0 -0
No, you don't.
He once pulled a gun on my mom.
You don't want to meet my dad.
No, you don't.
He once pulled a gun on my mom.
You don't want to meet my dad.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
...Son?
...Son?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
...Daughter?
...Daughter?
smilebuddha
+0 -0
"Father?"
"Yes, Son?"
" ...I want to kill you...[i]"
"Mother.....?
"[i]I want to....OHAWARRRAOOOGAAAAAAAABAGGGGG COME ON BABE! ."
[IMGS OFF]
"Father?"
"Yes, Son?"
" ...I want to kill you...[i]"
"Mother.....?
"[i]I want to....OHAWARRRAOOOGAAAAAAAABAGGGGG COME ON BABE! ."
[IMGS OFF]
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Why is Val Kilmer staring at me like that?
That bird better not mess with my credit score!
Why is Val Kilmer staring at me like that?
That bird better not mess with my credit score!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
"Why, for just pennies a day..."
"Why, for just pennies a day..."
belgand
+0 -0
I'm With the Band gave me new insight into exactly how Morrison was a dick. I mean, it's not a big secret that he was, but sometimes you really need to hear it from a groupie's memoirs.
Also, I learned that Jimmy Page apparently likes whipping and carried a selection of floggers with him on tour.
I'm With the Band gave me new insight into exactly how Morrison was a dick. I mean, it's not a big secret that he was, but sometimes you really need to hear it from a groupie's memoirs.
Also, I learned that Jimmy Page apparently likes whipping and carried a selection of floggers with him on tour.
rowboat
+0 -0
God, I wish I could have whipped Page. I'd of whipped that son of a bitch till he cummed till he died.
God, I wish I could have whipped Page. I'd of whipped that son of a bitch till he cummed till he died.
belgand
+0 -0
Not quite. He enjoyed whipping, not being whipped.
Not quite. He enjoyed whipping, not being whipped.
deafwhisperer
+1 -0
Always thought he was the cream of the crop.
Always thought he was the cream of the crop.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Fancied himself some sort of miracle.
Fancied himself some sort of miracle.
daidai
+0 -0
Okay, cool it.
Okay, cool it.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
We better hold the foam here.
We better hold the foam here.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
That went over like aHindenburg of walking into a room Led Zeppelin.
That went over like a
belgand
+0 -0
Not quite. He enjoyed whipping, not being whipped.
Not quite. He enjoyed whipping, not being whipped.
belgand
+0 -0
He also enjoyed double-posting.
He also enjoyed double-posting.
rowboat
+0 -0
Well, I'll just beat the shit out him for good measure.
Well, I'll just beat the shit out him for good measure.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Oh. Ok then.
Oh. Ok then.
belgand
+0 -0
Man, I totally don't get how it's now trendy to dislike the Doors. That is just plain crazy.
Man, I totally don't get how it's now trendy to dislike the Doors. That is just plain crazy.
tripleg
+1 -0
i know what you mean, i totally thought morrison was an overrated hack way before all the posers caught on
i know what you mean, i totally thought morrison was an overrated hack way before all the posers caught on
belgand
+0 -0
I still like the Doors in an entirely unironic manner. Screw you losers. It's like you don't enjoy organ solos... and we all know that TGH likes nothing better .
And on that note this has Carl Palmer playing a drum solo that is masturbatory even by 1970's prog rock standards. I mean, two gongs ? I'm not complaining - if I didn't like masturbatory solos why would I like listening to prog? - but damn is that long.
I still like the Doors in an entirely unironic manner. Screw you losers. It's like you don't enjoy organ solos... and we all know that TGH likes nothing better .
And on that note this has Carl Palmer playing a drum solo that is masturbatory even by 1970's prog rock standards. I mean, two gongs ? I'm not complaining - if I didn't like masturbatory solos why would I like listening to prog? - but damn is that long.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Whoa when did I say I hated the Doors. I've never listened to them because frankly that just isn't my cup of tea but I'm not dissing them. I just wanted to make a Brian Fellow joke that no one got.
Whoa when did I say I hated the Doors. I've never listened to them because frankly that just isn't my cup of tea but I'm not dissing them. I just wanted to make a Brian Fellow joke that no one got.
belgand
+0 -0
You're misreading it. I'm saying you enjoy organ solos. It was a ribald pun.
You're misreading it. I'm saying you enjoy organ solos. It was a ribald pun.
spazdor
+0 -0
Tchoh!
Tchoh!
rowboat
+0 -0
I like everything about The Doors except anything having to do with Jim Morrison. I wish Ray Manzarek would've hung out with Lou Reed and John Cale instead, basically.
I like everything about The Doors except anything having to do with Jim Morrison. I wish Ray Manzarek would've hung out with Lou Reed and John Cale instead, basically.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
hey guys just an fyi but baby me, toddler me, preteen me, teenage me, and current me are all going to kick all of your asses.
The Doors were awesome, Jim Morrison is awesome, and anyone who says otherwise can answer to The Me of Ages.
hey guys just an fyi but baby me, toddler me, preteen me, teenage me, and current me are all going to kick all of your asses.
The Doors were awesome, Jim Morrison is awesome, and anyone who says otherwise can answer to The Me of Ages.
rowboat
+0 -0
I'd like to see toddler you kick my ass. Really. I would pay to see that.
I'd like to see toddler you kick my ass. Really. I would pay to see that.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
I think Baby Autrepoupee would just curse at you from the sidelines.
I think Baby Autrepoupee would just curse at you from the sidelines.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
It'd be kinda like Mario and Luigi.
It'd be kinda like Mario and Luigi.
belgand
+0 -0
This is because you are right. I have your back on this one. I think this strip is entirely the correct place to have it out that just because you're an asshole doesn't mean you can't also be awesome.
This is because you are right. I have your back on this one. I think this strip is entirely the correct place to have it out that just because you're an asshole doesn't mean you can't also be awesome.
rowboat
+0 -0
I don't care if he was a jerk. I just don't like the cut of his jib. Or his lyrics.
I don't care if he was a jerk. I just don't like the cut of his jib. Or his lyrics.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Then you do not get The Doors.
Then you do not get The Doors.
rowboat
+0 -0
Perhaps not. I also do not get shirtless singers. Has that ever worked? I don't think so.
Perhaps not. I also do not get shirtless singers. Has that ever worked? I don't think so.
tripleg
+0 -0
it helps them project
it helps them project
belgand
+0 -0
Are you saying you have a problem with Roger Daltrey and Robert Plant as well?
Are you saying you have a problem with Roger Daltrey and Robert Plant as well?
rowboat
+0 -0
Quote:
Daltrey - Surprisingly, no. Well, not that surprising, I guess. The Who are great enough for it not to matter.
Plant - If I were a time-traveling super sniper (sadly, I am not) and I had a clear shot at Plant and Hitler (and you fuckin' know they were tight)....well, that'd be no choice at all. One squeeze of the trigger to save the world from Physical Graffiti? I'd do my part.
Quote:
Are you saying you have a problem with Roger Daltrey and Robert Plant as well?
Daltrey - Surprisingly, no. Well, not that surprising, I guess. The Who are great enough for it not to matter.
Plant - If I were a time-traveling super sniper (sadly, I am not) and I had a clear shot at Plant and Hitler (and you fuckin' know they were tight)....well, that'd be no choice at all. One squeeze of the trigger to save the world from Physical Graffiti? I'd do my part.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
What if they were standing next to each other and you had a bone-piercing bullet that would make sure it would fly through both of their heads, hold on, but then standing right next to them is the most prettiest girl in the world and she is going to have sex with you for the rest of your life!!
What would you do then?!
What if they were standing next to each other and you had a bone-piercing bullet that would make sure it would fly through both of their heads, hold on, but then standing right next to them is the most prettiest girl in the world and she is going to have sex with you for the rest of your life!!
What would you do then?!
rowboat
+0 -0
i would fuck the girl because i am a maniac for pussy
i would fuck the girl because i am a maniac for pussy
belgand
+0 -0
Man, what did "Kasmir" ever do to you?
I... I... this is something I can't even argue with you about. I just don't even know where to start.
The historical figures I most want to kill (or at least severely crotch-punch) are Issac Newton and Thomas Edison. They know what they did. Especially with Edison I'd think you'd know why they deserve it too.
Man, what did "Kasmir" ever do to you?
I... I... this is something I can't even argue with you about. I just don't even know where to start.
The historical figures I most want to kill (or at least severely crotch-punch) are Issac Newton and Thomas Edison. They know what they did. Especially with Edison I'd think you'd know why they deserve it too.
tekende
+0 -0
Are you fucking kidding me? I'm not a huge fan of Led Zeppelin, but man, Physical Graffiti is a fantastic album. And "Kasmir" is one of the best rock songs ever recorded. So just hush.
Are you fucking kidding me? I'm not a huge fan of Led Zeppelin, but man, Physical Graffiti is a fantastic album. And "Kasmir" is one of the best rock songs ever recorded. So just hush.
rowboat
+0 -0
I've been hearing that band throughout my entire life. I'm not guessing at this.
I've been hearing that band throughout my entire life. I'm not guessing at this.
scorpio_nadir
+2 -0
This tells me you are not even within the same solar system of "getting" Jim Morrison.
let me tell you about Jim Morrison and the Big Beat-
Soft, low, thoughtful, turning into a raging screaming beast
of undeniable feeling.
He HEARD the BEAT,
he lived it,
he swam away in its tide,
and drowned like a baby in his tub.
He was a poet of our generation,
but not like that fucking brilliant neurotic Ginsberg,
not like that other gifted nutcase Brautigan-
and nothing at all like the 99.9% who have come after
with their derivative, dull, pretentious crap,crap,carrrrap.
He was a Byronic flame, seeking, creeping, engulfing..
cosmic in his humanity, frail in his romantic ignorance-
a volcano of excess and passion
that probably would have blown his head off anyway.
Jim was a poet. He was a meteor that flew back
off the face of the earth.
The other 3 Doors were and would have remained
obscure and unknown, but for him.
It is fitting and fine that they live on
like Kings on their royalties.
It is fitting also that Jim lived like an asshole,
With no regard for anything.
yet he played with words that will not be forgotten.
So he will be remembered
and for the record-
I'm still pissed at Mikey.
It'll be 40 years this summer,
that he whined he had
to take his mom's car back
after Day 2 of Lewisville Pop-
Which we voted for instead-
instead of Woodstock.
The lesser, yet nearer
Lewisville, Texas Speedway.
And the rest of us were too scared to
hang out in the 100-plus degree heat,
For the best, last day,
and hitch 90 miles home.
We'd never done such a thing.
We'd seen Janis and Canned Heat,
Led Zep(pfft) Santana, Chicago,
B.B. King and Freddie King,
Buddy Guy, Incredible String Band.
(and the Dead played at the campground)
But we missed Day 3,
so we missed The Doors.
This tells me you are not even within the same solar system of "getting" Jim Morrison.
let me tell you about Jim Morrison and the Big Beat-
Soft, low, thoughtful, turning into a raging screaming beast
of undeniable feeling.
He HEARD the BEAT,
he lived it,
he swam away in its tide,
and drowned like a baby in his tub.
He was a poet of our generation,
but not like that fucking brilliant neurotic Ginsberg,
not like that other gifted nutcase Brautigan-
and nothing at all like the 99.9% who have come after
with their derivative, dull, pretentious crap,crap,carrrrap.
He was a Byronic flame, seeking, creeping, engulfing..
cosmic in his humanity, frail in his romantic ignorance-
a volcano of excess and passion
that probably would have blown his head off anyway.
Jim was a poet. He was a meteor that flew back
off the face of the earth.
The other 3 Doors were and would have remained
obscure and unknown, but for him.
It is fitting and fine that they live on
like Kings on their royalties.
It is fitting also that Jim lived like an asshole,
With no regard for anything.
yet he played with words that will not be forgotten.
So he will be remembered
and for the record-
I'm still pissed at Mikey.
It'll be 40 years this summer,
that he whined he had
to take his mom's car back
after Day 2 of Lewisville Pop-
Which we voted for instead-
instead of Woodstock.
The lesser, yet nearer
Lewisville, Texas Speedway.
And the rest of us were too scared to
hang out in the 100-plus degree heat,
For the best, last day,
and hitch 90 miles home.
We'd never done such a thing.
We'd seen Janis and Canned Heat,
Led Zep(pfft) Santana, Chicago,
B.B. King and Freddie King,
Buddy Guy, Incredible String Band.
(and the Dead played at the campground)
But we missed Day 3,
so we missed The Doors.
belgand
+0 -0
I can't find any references that the Doors actually played there and they certainly weren't listed on the poster. Frankly, from what I can find, Day 3 seemed good, but like the least essential day.
I can't find any references that the Doors actually played there and they certainly weren't listed on the poster. Frankly, from what I can find, Day 3 seemed good, but like the least essential day.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
You may be right. They were not listed originally, but I was told they were a last-minute addition.
But it is also entirely possible someone was yanking my chain with that story, although the guy I recall telling me that was not typically an embellisher.
In fact, (sideline story), this guy I did not know at the time, a paraplegic, wheelchair-bound longhair, was our landmark amidst the several-hundred thousand strong crowd. Whenever you had to leave to get sustenance or a porta-potty break, it was hella difficult to find your party on the return.
Coincidentally, he was in my freshman dorm a few months later, and at some point the subject of that Festival came up, and then the memory that it was the same guy. Same stetson hat, etc.
He became one of my best friends, he was just an amazing human being. He died 6-7 years ago.
However, the 3rd day included Ten Years After and Spirit, both of whom were at their peak then. I later saw Sly & The Family Stone- they put on a great show. Alot of the bands that played free like Grand Funk, Grateful Dead- they weren't listed.
The 12 Dreams of Dr. Sardonicus is one of the very few albums from then I can still listen to occasionally today.
You may be right. They were not listed originally, but I was told they were a last-minute addition.
But it is also entirely possible someone was yanking my chain with that story, although the guy I recall telling me that was not typically an embellisher.
In fact, (sideline story), this guy I did not know at the time, a paraplegic, wheelchair-bound longhair, was our landmark amidst the several-hundred thousand strong crowd. Whenever you had to leave to get sustenance or a porta-potty break, it was hella difficult to find your party on the return.
Coincidentally, he was in my freshman dorm a few months later, and at some point the subject of that Festival came up, and then the memory that it was the same guy. Same stetson hat, etc.
He became one of my best friends, he was just an amazing human being. He died 6-7 years ago.
However, the 3rd day included Ten Years After and Spirit, both of whom were at their peak then. I later saw Sly & The Family Stone- they put on a great show. Alot of the bands that played free like Grand Funk, Grateful Dead- they weren't listed.
The 12 Dreams of Dr. Sardonicus is one of the very few albums from then I can still listen to occasionally today.
stereo
+0 -0
Ten Years After is the only band I really have a care about :/ I regret not being alive before 1980.
Ten Years After is the only band I really have a care about :/ I regret not being alive before 1980.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Amazing. The only band Stereo has a care about? I really liked them back then.
I guess Alvin Lee may have the original shredder, but we thought he still hit tasteful licks, unlike Mark Farner.
He was a total speedfreak, or did a believable rendition of one.
I doubt I could bear to listen to them today, but that would be like Cornelius Bear trying to rock out to those groups.
The flame dies down eventually, and thank God for that.
Amazing. The only band Stereo has a care about? I really liked them back then.
I guess Alvin Lee may have the original shredder, but we thought he still hit tasteful licks, unlike Mark Farner.
He was a total speedfreak, or did a believable rendition of one.
I doubt I could bear to listen to them today, but that would be like Cornelius Bear trying to rock out to those groups.
The flame dies down eventually, and thank God for that.
stereo
+0 -0
I dunno what it is, just feels more personal. Most bands seem like strange people to me and it's hard for me to feel anything when I hear of things happening to them.
I dunno what it is, just feels more personal. Most bands seem like strange people to me and it's hard for me to feel anything when I hear of things happening to them.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Electric organs are the hotness, but Jim Morrison turning "Gloria" into a song about getting his dick sucked makes me mad. First of all, we all know that's what it's about anyway. No need to be blunt. And second of all, that's all Jim Morrison sings about.
Background: I like some/ a few Doors songs but not all. Mostly the instrumentation is where it's at for me.
Electric organs are the hotness, but Jim Morrison turning "Gloria" into a song about getting his dick sucked makes me mad. First of all, we all know that's what it's about anyway. No need to be blunt. And second of all, that's all Jim Morrison sings about.
Background: I like some/ a few Doors songs but not all. Mostly the instrumentation is where it's at for me.
belgand
+0 -0
If there is a song that is not about getting your dick sucked (or, in the same vein, about missing how you used to get your dick sucked) it is a song designed to get your dick sucked.
If there is a song that is not about getting your dick sucked (or, in the same vein, about missing how you used to get your dick sucked) it is a song designed to get your dick sucked.
yearsinhotclaws
+1 -0
I know it is hard to believe some people have gotten their dick sucked enough and that they are writing about other things and that is why I don't believe it. All human progress (A LAUGHABLE IDEA I MUST ADD) and human culture (HAHA REALLY) is based around the blowjob I could never get marybeth blowjob to give me. My dad says its because Dairy Queen is the whore of Babylon, but he used to work in the industry till the scooby doo gang figured out he wasn't a ghost haunting a defunct ice cream factory that was in the way of some low income housing, so he might be biased. He died 3 years after the Dairy Queen in our town got turned into an abandoned building and people didn't magically stop dealing drugs to each other. So now I'm waiting for dick sucking to go out of business, so I can find a fresher reason for why I can't write a good song.
I know it is hard to believe some people have gotten their dick sucked enough and that they are writing about other things and that is why I don't believe it. All human progress (A LAUGHABLE IDEA I MUST ADD) and human culture (HAHA REALLY) is based around the blowjob I could never get marybeth blowjob to give me. My dad says its because Dairy Queen is the whore of Babylon, but he used to work in the industry till the scooby doo gang figured out he wasn't a ghost haunting a defunct ice cream factory that was in the way of some low income housing, so he might be biased. He died 3 years after the Dairy Queen in our town got turned into an abandoned building and people didn't magically stop dealing drugs to each other. So now I'm waiting for dick sucking to go out of business, so I can find a fresher reason for why I can't write a good song.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I know most songs are probably about suckin' dee but we don't need Jim Morrison going "HEY GLORIA...GET ON YOUR KNEES AND SUCK MAH COCK ." Subtlety is the name of the game. Otherwise we wouldn't have this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btS7-UoK2Oo&feature=related
I know most songs are probably about suckin' dee but we don't need Jim Morrison going "HEY GLORIA...GET ON YOUR KNEES AND SUCK MAH COCK ." Subtlety is the name of the game. Otherwise we wouldn't have this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btS7-UoK2Oo&feature=related
stereo
+0 -0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPeHk4WMWpY
"I treat the street like a tampax, cause some bitch is bleedin on it"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPeHk4WMWpY
"I treat the street like a tampax, cause some bitch is bleedin on it"
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Ahh come on fucking guy.
Times change.
Ahh come on fucking guy.
Times change.
tragicone
+0 -0
People are strange, when your a stranger, women seem wicked, when you're alone.
People are strange, when your a stranger, women seem wicked, when you're alone.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I think you mean
People are strange/ When you're a stranger/ Faces seem ugly/ When you're alone.
I hate when commas are used for backslashes. THERE'S RULES FOR THIS LANGUAGE PEOPLE.
I think you mean
People are strange/ When you're a stranger/ Faces seem ugly/ When you're alone.
I hate when commas are used for backslashes. THERE'S RULES FOR THIS LANGUAGE PEOPLE.
tragicone
+0 -0
If you are prick/yeah, I guess there are/Next time you go out/get hit by a car.
If you are prick/yeah, I guess there are/Next time you go out/get hit by a car.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Now you know how to use it.
Now you know how to use it.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
WHEN I GO OUT AND PLAY IN THE STREET/I GET HIT BY CARS/I MAKE MASHED POTATOES AND GET HIT BY CARS.
YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
also: are you really supposed to use slashes instead of commas?
final word: a joke i heard in sixth grade-
Q: What is O.J. Simpsons' website address?
A: /\[esc][esc] (slash forward, slash backwards, escape, escape.)
WHEN I GO OUT AND PLAY IN THE STREET/I GET HIT BY CARS/I MAKE MASHED POTATOES AND GET HIT BY CARS.
YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
also: are you really supposed to use slashes instead of commas?
final word: a joke i heard in sixth grade-
Q: What is O.J. Simpsons' website address?
A: /\[esc][esc] (slash forward, slash backwards, escape, escape.)
nice-on-water
+0 -0
lololol
And yes you are. I get so mad when I see people in their AIM away messages put shitty song lyrics and go like:
"I'd do anything, for you because, you're my girl, and I love you, forever, and ever."
Horrific and fake but typical lyrics. DO YOU REALLY THINK COMMAS ARE APPLICABLE THERE FUCK FUCK
lololol
And yes you are. I get so mad when I see people in their AIM away messages put shitty song lyrics and go like:
"I'd do anything, for you because, you're my girl, and I love you, forever, and ever."
Horrific and fake but typical lyrics. DO YOU REALLY THINK COMMAS ARE APPLICABLE THERE FUCK FUCK
stereo
+0 -0
I'm pretty sure you don't mean backslash, unless you're from Australia.
I'm pretty sure you don't mean backslash, unless you're from Australia.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Slash \
Backslash /
Slash \
Backslash /
stereo
+1 -0
Any of you guys speak Cantonese?
(ok assetbar is gonna screw this up, but I gotta try)
How do you pronounce %u725B%u8089%u8178? (ngau4 juk6 coeng4 says Wikipedia) I don't want to make a fool of myself.
Any of you guys speak Cantonese?
(ok assetbar is gonna screw this up, but I gotta try)
How do you pronounce %u725B%u8089%u8178? (ngau4 juk6 coeng4 says Wikipedia) I don't want to make a fool of myself.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
How dare you!? My mother was a saint!
How dare you!? My mother was a saint!
whiteturtle
+4 -0
it is pronounced "percent-you-seven-two-five-bee-percent-eightoheightynine-percent-you-eightyoneseventyeight" then ngOHfour, jooksix, coheengfour. It is just like it is spelled. Also, I don't think that is Cantonese.
it is pronounced "percent-you-seven-two-five-bee-percent-eightoheightynine-percent-you-eightyoneseventyeight" then ngOHfour, jooksix, coheengfour. It is just like it is spelled. Also, I don't think that is Cantonese.
deafwhisperer
+0 -0
Yeah, sounds like mandarin to me.
Yeah, sounds like mandarin to me.
saulbellow
+0 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Sounds clementine actually.
Sounds clementine actually.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Assebar did not screw that up.
i read that cantonese totally! i mean, it showed up! (i don't know what it means either. i hate babelfish. its translations are lacking and if the words are typed in regular letters it doesn't translate at all. just gives you what you input and should add 'you dumb fuck.' on the end.)
Assebar did not screw that up.
i read that cantonese totally! i mean, it showed up! (i don't know what it means either. i hate babelfish. its translations are lacking and if the words are typed in regular letters it doesn't translate at all. just gives you what you input and should add 'you dumb fuck.' on the end.)
fermatprime
+0 -0
CHING CHONG WING WONG
CHING CHONG WING WONG
nictusempra
+2 -0
Ugh, delayed doublewides always end up being your worst strips, Onstad, just let something get out the gate before you tinker with it for three days.
Ugh, delayed doublewides always end up being your worst strips, Onstad, just let something get out the gate before you tinker with it for three days.
autrepoupee
+1 -0
there is no controlling him anymore--
Chris Onstad has gone rogue, off the grid, out of sight.
You think he's going left, but ol' Onstad's goin' right!
there is no controlling him anymore--
Chris Onstad has gone rogue, off the grid, out of sight.
You think he's going left, but ol' Onstad's goin' right!
theguitarhero
+0 -0
HARRISON FORD is CHRIS ONSTAD in:
ACHEWOOD ONE.
Get off my strip!
HARRISON FORD is CHRIS ONSTAD in:
ACHEWOOD ONE.
Get off my strip!
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Afternoon slips away, Mr. Onstad.
[IMGS OFF]
Afternoon slips away, Mr. Onstad.
[IMGS OFF]
bixschmix
+0 -0
Keep doing that dance of shame for Onstad...
Keep doing that dance of shame for Onstad...
saulbellow
+2 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
jthm_guitarist
+6 -0
[IMGS OFF]z
[IMGS OFF]z
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Why does Ray look like Richard F. Outcault's The Yellow Kid?
[IMGS OFF]
Why does Ray look like Richard F. Outcault's The Yellow Kid?
[IMGS OFF]
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Umm...
[IMGS OFF]
Umm...
[IMGS OFF]
octafish
+0 -0
I thought "That Yellow Bastard".
I thought "That Yellow Bastard".
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Cuz its Hogan's Alley an wir all jezz krazy imigrits
Cuz its Hogan's Alley an wir all jezz krazy imigrits
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Daaaaaaaaamn.
Daaaaaaaaamn.
nice-on-water
+1 -0
I actually find the terse, 3 word sentence in the last panel meant for a huge thought bubble hilarious. Chubtown, population jthm_guitarist.
I actually find the terse, 3 word sentence in the last panel meant for a huge thought bubble hilarious. Chubtown, population jthm_guitarist.
tekende
+1 -0
Goldarnit. I'm out of chubbies, and this totally deserves one from me.
Goldarnit. I'm out of chubbies, and this totally deserves one from me.
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
The denizens of the Achewood premium content heliblimp might have gotten a chuckle if they weren't busy clinking glasses and watching Ray wonder if he should pants Roastbeef now that their relationship is defined as that not being possible.
(Actually they are just watching the pants dream sequence and rewinding over and over again.)
Runner up: Ray won't pants Roastbeef because Roastbeef has a woman now, Ray wonders why this is and relates it in a humorous metaphorical way that noone who writes for a forum and not the website the forum is dedicated to is able to approximate.
The denizens of the Achewood premium content heliblimp might have gotten a chuckle if they weren't busy clinking glasses and watching Ray wonder if he should pants Roastbeef now that their relationship is defined as that not being possible.
(Actually they are just watching the pants dream sequence and rewinding over and over again.)
Runner up: Ray won't pants Roastbeef because Roastbeef has a woman now, Ray wonders why this is and relates it in a humorous metaphorical way that noone who writes for a forum and not the website the forum is dedicated to is able to approximate.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
What the fuck kind of crazy pills are you taking?
What the fuck kind of crazy pills are you taking?
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
See, in the early days of the strip Ray could've pantsed roast beef at any time. Ray could've done anything he wanted because Ray and Roastbeef were only defined as "cool" and "depressed." My post was about how in the premium content forums, (that I've never seen and never read about here since I took a long break from posting) those uber rich enough to pay 3 dollars a month would get to watch an animated achewood cartoon (I forgot to include the words hi def to make you know it was animated) of ray imagining something from the early days of excitement, when he was a cardboard cutout who could still go anywhere and do whatever without getting run over by the snowball of decisions his personality amounts too. The achewood premium viewers rewind Roastbeef getting pantsed(scratch that, now its wedgied) over and over, like the part in the youtube video where the kid freaks out that my friend can't stop rewinding.
See, in the early days of the strip Ray could've pantsed roast beef at any time. Ray could've done anything he wanted because Ray and Roastbeef were only defined as "cool" and "depressed." My post was about how in the premium content forums, (that I've never seen and never read about here since I took a long break from posting) those uber rich enough to pay 3 dollars a month would get to watch an animated achewood cartoon (I forgot to include the words hi def to make you know it was animated) of ray imagining something from the early days of excitement, when he was a cardboard cutout who could still go anywhere and do whatever without getting run over by the snowball of decisions his personality amounts too. The achewood premium viewers rewind Roastbeef getting pantsed(scratch that, now its wedgied) over and over, like the part in the youtube video where the kid freaks out that my friend can't stop rewinding.
stereo
+0 -0
Or when Teodor's pants fall down after he dies and is revived.
Love that strip.
Or when Teodor's pants fall down after he dies and is revived.
Love that strip.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
flut.
flut.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
do not love them.
do not love them.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
not at all.
not at all.
rowboat
+0 -0
That was going to have to be pretty damn good for me not to hate it based solely on a yellow Ray. It was pretty damn and I didn't hate it. The end.
That was going to have to be pretty damn good for me not to hate it based solely on a yellow Ray. It was pretty damn and I didn't hate it. The end.
sprayette
+0 -0
Sounds like my dad but more poetic. Also sounds like me. Blut ist blut.
Sounds like my dad but more poetic. Also sounds like me. Blut ist blut.
...janitor all mentally scarred for life
all absent-mindedly mopping the floor back in forth
just the same part of the floor
get the first post and make a typo ?
i had better go get mother out of the coffin again
Leave her out for me. I like a nice cold one after work.
Talk about gettin' a stiffy.
I like my jokes like my women. Groaners
A comment left by fireking was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by headphones, DrSkradley, tripleG, vermy, violentlymickey, aHatOfPig, Frankreich)
I had a woman once. It was nice.
That's no way to treat coffee!
That's exactly the way to treat coffee. Keeps the aroma.
Also, wrapped as air-tightly as possible.
That would be a great opinion... if Alton Brown didn't disagree with it!
"Now as for temperatures, freezing or refrigerating may be popular with coffee fans but not with coffee beans. See, each time you fetch them from the chill, moisture condenses on the surface of the bean which only makes them degrade faster. Now as long as you don't stash this near the oven, room temperature will do just fine."
SLAM!
The HELL I just walked home from Mexico!
If Alton disagrees with it, it is not a great opinion.
It is simple.
But what about the Alton giant ?
Figure 12: The Alton Giant
[IMGS OFF]
Homeboy was tall.
Tall person is tall.
The giant of Illinois died from a blister on his toe after walking all day in the first Winter's snow. Throwing bits of stale bread to the last speckled doves, he never even felt his shoe full of blood.
...the Saddest Thing?
(somebody had to say it)
Daaaaaaaamn.
Alton Brown does not keep his women near the oven.
Good to know, good to know.
Does Alton Brown even keep women?
not for long
No, no, no. The proper reply is, "He gets with the women, but in the end they do not like him." What the hell is wrong with you?
Oh, sorry I don't feel the need to only fucking talk in Achewoodisms.
From which 5th grade recess and tenderly clumsy first relationship does your unique viewpoint hail? How does the day your former best friend Ronald showed you what rotten.com was and from which ugly girls locker did you first make plans to dethrone god and remove all lifeforms from office? I'm only asking because We, the gigantic, unthinking, unblinking, hivemind that for being a mind is still unthinking and for being unblinking is still incapable of seeing the web of banality that sustains our orbit around the center of ourselves, are curious why this brash, young, hotshot motorcycle inseminator is to busy crossbreeding motorcycles to talk like us.
If none of that relates to you, if none of those questions made any sense at all, just answer this one,
Where on the internet did you learn to say "Tall person is tall"?
That meme is so ingrained into the subconscious of every internet community that anyone can know about it and not necessarily have to have ever been to 4chan.
So I learned it from everyone ever.
I've never been to 4chan for more than a nice tawdry wank on some cartoon flank, so I guess I wouldn't know why someone with an armful of tv dinners can't get along with someone who prefers MRE's. Neither of you cook so whats the difference at a banquet?
If I give you any more chubbies, you and me are gonna have to move to Massachusetts.
You are a handsome man with a fine ass plan. If this goes down, I will have the rifle and the weedeater covered. All I need is 2 squares a day, an inoperative watertower for target practice, your unwavering worship, and in return I will destroy every weed within a 6 mile radius of your property and cheat on you with a goose in the woods.
standard contract, please sign here_________
Can a swan or possibly duck be substituted for the goose? What about a crane?
Braincase is all, "NON SEQUITER DOES NOT COMPUTE; CHECKING FOR TESTICLES; ERROR. CHECKING FOR Facepalm.doc; TRITE. WARNING: THERE IS AN ASS ON MY CASE; WARNING: DETECTING METHANE BUILDUP; ALL SYSTEMS INDICATE FART-THREAT WILL SHATTER CASE AND LEAVE FLESH EXPOSED TO WORLD-THREAT; RECOMMEND IMMEDIATE PASSIVE DERISIO-"
"The log ends there, Captain."
"Before that we have a few hours of forum browsing footage, but all prior records seem to have been erased by mistake when it was trying to delete memories of horse genitalia from a childhood trip to a farm."
"Flush it down the hole, Manchild. Nothing to see here I havn't crapped a thousand times."
[quote]Oh, sorry I don't feel the need to only fucking talk in Achewoodisms.[/quote/
Oh, sorry, I only felt the need to find an excuse to say "What the hell is wrong with you?"
Xiaomimi, you are like a tiny robotic angel to me. It is as though Google were condensed into a small person that lived in my computer and automatically trawled the seas of information to give me delicious morsels that I am interested in. I would like to subscribe to you.
I like women like your avatar: animated and reciprocating.
Whispering to himself about a man with no pity ... an art teacher with no head.
the drama teacher all going back to college for his masters in business
students all going home to focus on their grades immediately
A comment left by gormster was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by entropyends, MrFedora, coffeecoaster, handheld, IronDave, aHatOfPig, TheSoulBear)
was it wrong that, while i was reading your reply, i imagined you talking with a lisp?
You have earned a very dramatic middle finger from the theatre major.
You have earned a very dramatic middle finger from the
theatre majorhistrionic barrista.Hey some of us are waiters.
This is a friendly reminder to be nice to your bagger at the grocery store. One day he might snap and start hiding razor blades in your produce, but he always remembers a friendly face.
Given that it's common knowledge that he's gay, no.
Because stereotypes are never wrong!
drama kids are the worst
I disagree. Horse girls are the worst. I mean, girls who love horses. As pets. Do not misconstrue this.
Why, what is there to misconstrue?
thegoodwillgirl does not like it when girls are two things in one
That's twothingism!
Ponygirls. I wanted to find an appropriate picture, but let's face it, you're never going to find something even remotely appropriate enough to be posting here. Find you own damn ponygirl pictures!
Ponygirls: furries in denial?
Yeah, what's the deal with that? Why do so many girls like horses?
Because:
The best looking boys are taken
The best looking boys are staying inside
So Judy, where does that leave you?
Walking the street from morning to night
With a star upon your shoulder lighting up the path that you walk
With a parrot on your shoulder, saying everything when you talk
If you're ever feeling blue
Then write another song about your dream of horses
Write a song about your dream of horses
Call it Judy And The Dream Of Horses
Call it Judy And The Dream Of Horses
You dream of horses
The whiteturtle done wrong again.
If they follow you, don't look back like rowboat in the movies.
I'd love to see this thread thrive and grow to include a wide variety of posters' names and song quotes. Unfortunately, I have to imagine that Achewood and Belle & Sebastian would pass each other like ships in the night in one of Ol' Man Venn's diagrams.
There is no Belle and Sebastian in my Venn Diagram.
When suddenly Johnny gets the feeling he's being surrounded by
horses, horses, horses, horses
coming in in all directions
white shining silver studs with their nose in flames,
He saw horses, horses, horses, horses, horses, horses, horses, horses.
Do you know how to pony like bony maroney
Do you know how to twist, well it goes like this, it goes like this
Baby mash potato, do the alligator, do the alligator
And you twist the twister like your baby sister
I want your baby sister, give me your baby sister, dig your baby sister
Rise up on her knees, do the sweet pea, do the sweet pee pee,
Roll down on her back, got to lose control, got to lose control,
Got to lose control and then you take control,
Then you're rolled down on your back and you like it like that,
Like it like that, like it like that, like it like that,
Then you do the watusi, yeah do the watusi
octafish died for somebody's sins but not mine.
Me and mystkmanat could become close friends cause we get on the same train and he wants to talk to me.
Unfortunately I myself fit only one criterion.
Hey, you. You like Belle and Sebastian, and Achewood. Can we get married?
I don't know, but fuck those girls.
All leaving school early because their horse has a vet appointment.
All not having a social life outside of the stables because their trainer needs help feeding and brushing all the horses until seven o'clock every night.
All riding their horse to the prom while you just take a stupid limo.
all taking massive horse wang for six hundo
Massive slam on horse girls' cervix' out of nowhere!
Or possibly uvula and epiglottis, more Ms. Eames style.
Jonathan Richman also address this topic in "Since She Started to Ride"
Quote:
Her lower arms they're brown but the rest is kinda pale
She'd buy Betadine if she only had a dollar
And she'd live out in the pasture if she only had a tail.
No I don't see her much since she started with horses.
No I don't see her much since she started to ride.
Well her jeans they get like a wet saddle blanket
And her boots are like you'd figure, And her car is full of hay
Horses, humans if she had to rank it,
You'd bet on they that canter and them that need fly sprayin'.
You see I don't see her much since she started with horses.
No I don't see her much since she started to ride.
Cantle and fender, Barrell and mane
Don't see her much since she started to train
Cannonbone, knee bone, Forearm and arm
I don't see her much when she heads to the barn.
She's so satisfied when she's riding and trainin'
She must love that smell of the barn, I must say
She's satisfied when she's groomin' and grainin'
She's tired in the evening and she's gone in the day
I don't see her much since she started with horses
I don't see her much since she started to ride
I have this theory that a lot of those horse girls had their first orgasm whilst in the saddle.
I just got off a horse...
And boy are my arms tired!
so horse girls are OK? [IMGS OFF]
i mean half girl/half horse breeding anomolies
Blucher!
*horse whinnies*
i can't believe i got lamed for this. what the hell is wrong with you people. i thought you lot were creative types?
anyway, maybe it's just the difference between your high school drama and my high school drama. mine involved quite a lot of beer and improv.
Even in these economic days shitting on businesspeople (which you definitely did up there, while fancypants only sort of shit on drama until you brought it up) is a hard sell.
Is hardest sell in toughest room, played on tiniest violin...hmmm?
the point i am trying to make is that most people who enroll in business degrees are doing it for the wrong reasons, which is to become rich and powerful with no effort. those people are selfish bastards, and are the people responsible for our current bullshit state of affairs. case in point: gwb. harvard business school, rich and powerful, fucked economy.
my highly unscientific survey of the people i know who went to business school seems to dispute your thesis. while respondents overwhelmingly went into business to become rich and/or powerful, the majority laughed at the whole "no effort" part. only half were selfish, the others were merely morally weak.