gormster
+0 -0
The things a man will do for sixty bucks.
The things a man will do for sixty bucks.
spectre
+0 -0
I would eat cheese for 60 bucks.
I would eat cheese for 60 bucks.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
And I thought you were a regular guy.
And I thought you were a regular guy.
fancypants
+0 -0
"Hey the red wax is coming off this chedda- waitaminit, is this Manchego?!? BLAH! It's gonna cost you at least $ 150 for me to eat fuckin' Manchego, bitch!"
"Hey the red wax is coming off this chedda- waitaminit, is this Manchego?!? BLAH! It's gonna cost you at least $ 150 for me to eat fuckin' Manchego, bitch!"
lexsenthur
+3 -0
I've actually had cheese that comes wrapped in woven linen bandages that they put on the cheese and let mold, part of the aging process. You peel the bandages back and then serve up the
It's like working at an army field hospital and finding a delicious treat on rounds rather than a gangrenous limb that needs amputating.
I've actually had cheese that comes wrapped in woven linen bandages that they put on the cheese and let mold, part of the aging process. You peel the bandages back and then serve up the
It's like working at an army field hospital and finding a delicious treat on rounds rather than a gangrenous limb that needs amputating.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Maybe they should mark it in funny body-part shapes! Diseased dong cheese!
Maybe they should mark it in funny body-part shapes! Diseased dong cheese!
daidai
+1 -0
Trust me, you don't want dong cheese. Last time I ever fuck a stripper.
Trust me, you don't want dong cheese. Last time I ever fuck a stripper.
daidai
+7 -0
My avatar is judging me.
My avatar is judging me.
harpo
+1 -0
drskradley
+0 -0
It's rare that the use of negative space is so well conveyed.
CHUBBIED.
It's rare that the use of negative space is so well conveyed.
CHUBBIED.
vegasrebel29
+1 -0
It's $60 now, but it's fast approaching a six hundo.
It's $60 now, but it's fast approaching a six hundo.
coffeecoaster
+0 -0
Rarely do I find prose written in such fashion as to be both tasty and arousing.
This is because I do not often read what Cornelius writes.
Rarely do I find prose written in such fashion as to be both tasty and arousing.
This is because I do not often read what Cornelius writes.
hatstand_mcq
+3 -0
Arousing? It was going alright to the cheeseboard came out, then things took a turn for the mega-nasty. The combined maternal and predatory instincts involved in a woman covertly feeding stealth-manchego to a boy literally young enough to be her son, in order to nourish him up for the sexing time, is ghastly. I'm really bothered by the whole thing. I don't even know if I like Cornelius any more.
Arousing? It was going alright to the cheeseboard came out, then things took a turn for the mega-nasty. The combined maternal and predatory instincts involved in a woman covertly feeding stealth-manchego to a boy literally young enough to be her son, in order to nourish him up for the sexing time, is ghastly. I'm really bothered by the whole thing. I don't even know if I like Cornelius any more.
smilebuddha
+5 -0
You're right, hatstand. Sex with cougars is hideous and a horrible event.
[IMGS OFF]
But just look at those eyes! How can you say no?
You're right, hatstand. Sex with cougars is hideous and a horrible event.
[IMGS OFF]
But just look at those eyes! How can you say no?
fattybeaver
+0 -0
It's maternal, predatory, and stealthy. What nickname could we possibly give these wealthy elderly women...
It's maternal, predatory, and stealthy. What nickname could we possibly give these wealthy elderly women...
stereo
+1 -0
Vampire bat!
Vampire bat!
wozzeck
+1 -0
My baby is a cool machine
She moves to the pulse of her generator
Says damn that sex supreme.
She says damn that horror bat
Sex vampire, cool machine
Release the bats! release the bats!
Release them!
My baby is a cool machine
She moves to the pulse of her generator
Says damn that sex supreme.
She says damn that horror bat
Sex vampire, cool machine
Release the bats! release the bats!
Release them!
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Palin
Palin
falseprophet
+6 -0
Oh please man there ain't nothin stealthy about Sarah Palin soon as she thinks she got the drop on you she can't help bein a maverick and yells "OH HEY THERE NOW DON'CHA KNOW." She then tries to suck your dick but your boner is gone before it's even out of your jeans.
Oh please man there ain't nothin stealthy about Sarah Palin soon as she thinks she got the drop on you she can't help bein a maverick and yells "OH HEY THERE NOW DON'CHA KNOW." She then tries to suck your dick but your boner is gone before it's even out of your jeans.
ethelthefrog
+0 -0
HA!
HA!
jesler729
+0 -0
I, too, let out an oddly distinguished HA.
I, too, let out an oddly distinguished HA.
stsasser
+0 -0
I shall call a woman 'Sugar Pea' today and chuckle inwardly at my sly wit.
I shall call a woman 'Sugar Pea' today and chuckle inwardly at my sly wit.
spectre
+2 -0
And will you coax her nubbin?
And will you coax her nubbin?
r0g3r_day
+0 -0
I have enough coax here to do three televisions and several nubbbin.
I have enough coax here to do three televisions and several nubbbin.
indoorsman
+2 -0
Have i gone completely mad or is panel 7 the first time Cornelius smiles like that?
Have i gone completely mad or is panel 7 the first time Cornelius smiles like that?
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Also the moue he affects in panel four.
Also the moue he affects in panel four.
spectre
+0 -0
Chubbied for a PBF image in your icon.
Chubbied for a PBF image in your icon.
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Not today
Not today
wolfensti
+0 -0
I'd sell my soul for a puppy
I'd sell my soul for a puppy
gato_enfermo
+0 -0
Gee Golly
Gee Golly
jeffspaulding
+3 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
wolfensti
+0 -0
Well played
Well played
mattylite
+5 -0
I think so, and I think I know where he got that smile, and really that whole pose from:
[IMGS OFF]
I think so, and I think I know where he got that smile, and really that whole pose from:
[IMGS OFF]
plummet
+1 -0
some shop a computer in front of cornelius
it will be fuckin hysterical
some shop a computer in front of cornelius
it will be fuckin hysterical
usversusthem
+23 -0
Well, I got an image of an Achewood computer... put it down on a white background... then I got a picture of Connie, looking all classical and such... arranged it nicely next to it. I only looked away for half a second, but in my egregious moment of Daedalusian hubris, something truly Mexican happened. See for yourselves:
[IMGS OFF]
Well, I got an image of an Achewood computer... put it down on a white background... then I got a picture of Connie, looking all classical and such... arranged it nicely next to it. I only looked away for half a second, but in my egregious moment of Daedalusian hubris, something truly Mexican happened. See for yourselves:
[IMGS OFF]
srikamaraja
+0 -0
You have made me laugh out loud for nearly an entire minute. Thank you. This has truly been a Momentary Diversion on the Road to the Grave, and I will cherish it forever.
You have made me laugh out loud for nearly an entire minute. Thank you. This has truly been a Momentary Diversion on the Road to the Grave, and I will cherish it forever.
aperson
+1 -0
I've secretly never liked the smiles in achewood pass it on.
I've secretly never liked the smiles in achewood pass it on.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Smile when you say that, Shorty.
Smile when you say that, Shorty.
aperson
+38 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
aperson
+2 -0
Holy hell. No further proof is needed of Onstad's genius with small curved lines.
Holy hell. No further proof is needed of Onstad's genius with small curved lines.
plummet
+0 -0
so genius your moustache disappeared
so genius your moustache disappeared
aperson
+0 -0
...Onstad didn't make that picture there.
...Onstad didn't make that picture there.
plummet
+0 -0
but you used his style
but you used his style
aperson
+0 -0
Badly.
Badly.
stereo
+0 -0
Whoa. whoa .
Whoa. whoa .
octafish
+1 -0
...whoa De-li-lah
...whoa De-li-lah
aperson
+0 -0
God... it does look a bit like Tom Jones.
God... it does look a bit like Tom Jones.
snuffysmith
+0 -0
i was thinking an ape... but i guess Tom is a bit slopeish
i was thinking an ape... but i guess Tom is a bit slopeish
jeffspaulding
+6 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
hatstand_mcq
+2 -0
Yet more anti-welsh racism from the assetbar community.
Yet more anti-welsh racism from the assetbar community.
awko
+12 -0
Once I had What's New Pussycat? stuck in my head and was driving me crazy. I tried everything I could think of to try and drive it out. I blasted death metal, visited psychics, sensory depravation, but nothing worked.
Eventually I bit the bullet and took myself off to a psychiatrist. Upon telling him my probelems he informed me that I had what is known as "Tom Jones Syndrome".
I told him I'd never heard of it and asked "Is it a common problem?"
He replied "Oh, It's not unusual
Once I had What's New Pussycat? stuck in my head and was driving me crazy. I tried everything I could think of to try and drive it out. I blasted death metal, visited psychics, sensory depravation, but nothing worked.
Eventually I bit the bullet and took myself off to a psychiatrist. Upon telling him my probelems he informed me that I had what is known as "Tom Jones Syndrome".
I told him I'd never heard of it and asked "Is it a common problem?"
He replied "Oh, It's not unusual
awko
+0 -0
BBCODE!!!!!
BBCODE!!!!!
jesler729
+0 -0
I set this as my desktop background. TILED!
I set this as my desktop background. TILED!
spectre
+0 -0
Off topic, but: You know how sometimes you can't get a song out of your head? Ever since I read the phrase "Celebrity Death Beep on my Blackberry" in Ray's blog, I can't get a BUSINESS MODEL out of my head.
Off topic, but: You know how sometimes you can't get a song out of your head? Ever since I read the phrase "Celebrity Death Beep on my Blackberry" in Ray's blog, I can't get a BUSINESS MODEL out of my head.
wozzeck
+2 -0
Girls like a boy who awakens sweat-soaked and violent beside them from dreams of persecution by invisible devils.
Girls like a boy who awakens sweat-soaked and violent beside them from dreams of persecution by invisible devils.
jake11
+1 -0
that's funny, I usually don't get second dates
that's funny, I usually don't get second dates
gato_enfermo
+0 -0
that's funny, they're not usually invisible.
that's funny, they're not usually invisible.
wozzeck
+0 -0
Perhaps you are eating the wrong cheese.
Perhaps you are eating the wrong cheese.
thegoblins
+0 -0
"The six cheeses were all British," the article states apologetically.
"The six cheeses were all British," the article states apologetically.
hatstand_mcq
+3 -0
I think we've all paid a friend to write pornography for us. Of course, you can write it yourself, but that seems a bit lame. It's hard to imagine James Bond doing that.
I think we've all paid a friend to write pornography for us. Of course, you can write it yourself, but that seems a bit lame. It's hard to imagine James Bond doing that.
narenial
+0 -0
I do believe that Carter Thayer III may be a close cousin of Jack "Tennis" Amore . . .
I do believe that Carter Thayer III may be a close cousin of Jack "Tennis" Amore . . .
aperson
+0 -0
Carter Thayer III is a preppy asshole. Jack 'Tennis' Amore is a dude any man would want as a friend.
Carter Thayer III is a preppy asshole. Jack 'Tennis' Amore is a dude any man would want as a friend.
narenial
+0 -0
In addition:
I wonder if this shall become another 'love romance'?
In addition:
I wonder if this shall become another 'love romance'?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Will Connie turn to Philippe for help? Stay tuned.
Will Connie turn to Philippe for help? Stay tuned.
dr_memory
+0 -0
"Going past the sale," LOLZ, I haven't laughed at this strip so much in a while.
"Going past the sale," LOLZ, I haven't laughed at this strip so much in a while.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Check Cornelius affecting something similar to Roast Beef's Writing Triceps in panel six.
I also enjoy how Ray attempts to hurry up the process of having the fiction extended by pressing it against Cornelius' shoulder.
Check Cornelius affecting something similar to Roast Beef's Writing Triceps in panel six.
I also enjoy how Ray attempts to hurry up the process of having the fiction extended by pressing it against Cornelius' shoulder.
octafish
+0 -0
$1799 seems a little steep for a vibrator that doesn't even penetrate, still it makes coleslaw, so put me down for two.
$1799 seems a little steep for a vibrator that doesn't even penetrate, still it makes coleslaw, so put me down for two.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Not the first confluence of food and vibrators:
[IMGS OFF]
Not the first confluence of food and vibrators:
[IMGS OFF]
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Also, have you ever had a milkshake? You don't want to know how that consistency is achieved, believe me.
Also, have you ever had a milkshake? You don't want to know how that consistency is achieved, believe me.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
This one's for coleslaw, this one's for sex. Don't get them confused or everyone will want to know why your salad tastes so bad.
This one's for coleslaw, this one's for sex. Don't get them confused or everyone will want to know why your salad tastes so bad.
octafish
+12 -0
This is my corer
This is my gun *grabs crotch*
This is for coleslaw
This is for fun *grabs crotch*
This is my corer
This is my gun *grabs crotch*
This is for coleslaw
This is for fun *grabs crotch*
lexsenthur
+0 -0
HE-heeeee!
HE-heeeee!
aperson
+1 -0
In fact octafish, many women do not enjoy penetrative coleslaw making.
In fact octafish, many women do not enjoy penetrative coleslaw making.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
I guess you just don't have the sexual imagination some women do. Some ladies like getting their slaw cored, if you get what I mean, and what I mean is their vagina.
I guess you just don't have the sexual imagination some women do. Some ladies like getting their slaw cored, if you get what I mean, and what I mean is their vagina.
tekende
+1 -0
Don't stop, or he'll get mad...
Don't stop, or he'll get mad...
dasilodavi
+0 -0
The whole thing invokes an image of powerful business women in suits humping vibrating appliances to get their thrills between their busy schedules.
But what of the Lady realtors who have had menopause?
The whole thing invokes an image of powerful business women in suits humping vibrating appliances to get their thrills between their busy schedules.
But what of the Lady realtors who have had menopause?
fancypants
+6 -1
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
neonfreon
+0 -0
what made you think anyone wanted to see this?
what made you think anyone wanted to see this?
fancypants
+1 -0
neonfreon doth protest too much, methinks
neonfreon doth protest too much, methinks
harpo
+0 -0
I thought it was a witty call-back of the Bensington Butters storyline. (menopausal lady realtors and all)
Bravo !
I thought it was a witty call-back of the Bensington Butters storyline. (menopausal lady realtors and all)
Bravo !
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Dammit Harpo, you get back in that steamer trunk. You been dipping into Mr. Driftwood's booze again? Imagine you talking .
Dammit Harpo, you get back in that steamer trunk. You been dipping into Mr. Driftwood's booze again? Imagine you talking .
chico
+1 -0
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
%u0414%u043C%u0438%u0442%u0440%u0438%u0439 %u041C%u0435%u0434%u0432%u0435%u0434%u0435%u0432
%u0414%u043C%u0438%u0442%u0440%u0438%u0439 %u041C%u0435%u0434%u0432%u0435%u0434%u0435%u0432
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
I said
%u0414%u043C%u0438%u0442%u0440%u0438%u0439 %u041C%u0435%u0434%u0432%u0435%u0434%u0435%u0432
I said
%u0414%u043C%u0438%u0442%u0440%u0438%u0439 %u041C%u0435%u0434%u0432%u0435%u0434%u0435%u0432
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
oh goddamnit
oh goddamnit
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
pussylips
pussylips
antimatter
+1 -0
What did you call me?
[IMGS OFF]
What did you call me?
[IMGS OFF]
doppelganger
+0 -0
I dig the Bob Newhart tie (Chicago, not VT).
It must still be the 1970's in Russia.
I dig the Bob Newhart tie (Chicago, not VT).
It must still be the 1970's in Russia.
gladi8orrex
+1 -0
get one of him smiling it is a wonderful thing 2 see the man smile
get one of him smiling it is a wonderful thing 2 see the man smile
mattylite
+0 -0
What the hell man don't talk
What the hell man don't talk
nice-on-water
+0 -0
You keep your bill out of this.
You keep your bill out of this.
neonfreon
+0 -0
the OP was a witty call back, the image was just an image i didnt want to see/didnt want anyone to see me seeing
the OP was a witty call back, the image was just an image i didnt want to see/didnt want anyone to see me seeing
neonfreon
+0 -0
sorry, no hard feelings
sorry, no hard feelings
smallblackdog
+0 -0
It is an abominable thing
It is an abominable thing
doppelganger
+0 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
thegoblins
+1 -0
I must point out, that cabbage corer does not look like it has any vibrating bits you can safely sit on without having your cabbage cored.
I must point out, that cabbage corer does not look like it has any vibrating bits you can safely sit on without having your cabbage cored.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
You just have to nuzzle on the corner. Haven't you ever broken in a washer and dryer before?
You just have to nuzzle on the corner. Haven't you ever broken in a washer and dryer before?
neonfreon
+1 -0
thats what she said
thats what she said
thegoblins
+0 -0
Why would I have done a thing like that?
Why would I have done a thing like that?
theirateturk
+0 -0
Girls don't like boys
Girls don't like boys
fancypants
+1 -0
Girls like high-end erotic fiction with strong consumerist motifs.
Girls like high-end erotic fiction with strong consumerist motifs.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Girls like things that make common sense,
What's best for all concerned.
Don't want to have to go out of their waaaaaay and the
Girls want to be with the girls.
Girls like things that make common sense,
What's best for all concerned.
Don't want to have to go out of their waaaaaay and the
Girls want to be with the girls.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Connie's pulling a Phillipe moment of concentration in panel two.
Connie's pulling a Phillipe moment of concentration in panel two.
neonfreon
+0 -0
remember when an achewood strip might be like 6 panels at the most and just a few sentences to read
it seems like it's always long and intense now, more novel and less graphic
yup
remember when an achewood strip might be like 6 panels at the most and just a few sentences to read
it seems like it's always long and intense now, more novel and less graphic
yup
gato_enfermo
+10 -0
Why complain - are your lips getting tired?
Why complain - are your lips getting tired?
stereo
+9 -0
His finger keeps leaving streaks on the monitor. :(
His finger keeps leaving streaks on the monitor. :(
neonfreon
+0 -0
where's the complaint? looks more like a statement of fact to me
where's the complaint? looks more like a statement of fact to me
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
here's a statement of fact: real soldiers scrap in the heights
here's a statement of fact: real soldiers scrap in the heights
gladi8orrex
+24 -0
dude u cant end here
i got a nut on loan form hell
gimme teh wheel an' i'll steer
ib u aint got guts to finish
my dix so hard it grew a mouth an' 8 spinach
u needa write teh rest. NOW!
ma dix grown more meat than a sow
common connie! imabout to more milk than a cow!
im gonna bust a nut
all teh porn ive seen 'til now
feels like a treasure hunt. needa RELAX!
didn't know what i needed to find
turns out it was a rustic woven rind
covered up wit red wax
oooh, imabout to blow my loa'(d)
oh baby finish teh book, i simply must know
what's gonna happen in dat mansion
ma dix a monster of flesh expansion
like a tickin' clock or even a eurasian
cabbage corer, whatever teh fuck is
connie, all i know si i abot 2 JIZZ !
i aint no scientist, i aint no whizz
but i do know i got a nut on loan from hell
ima church steeple an all. my balls teh bell
dont mine me as i beat ma meat thru my pants
when i cum ima hafta take a wide stance
dont be scared, cuz when i blow i yell
ma cum is a consistancey not unlike gel
i fink i just "went past the sale"
but u get teh point
i jus' needa know how it ends
ma blu balls is given me teh bends
once ur done, connie i'ma be in heaven
for ordering information. please see page 47
awwwwww, yaaaaa
dude u cant end here
i got a nut on loan form hell
gimme teh wheel an' i'll steer
ib u aint got guts to finish
my dix so hard it grew a mouth an' 8 spinach
u needa write teh rest. NOW!
ma dix grown more meat than a sow
common connie! imabout to more milk than a cow!
im gonna bust a nut
all teh porn ive seen 'til now
feels like a treasure hunt. needa RELAX!
didn't know what i needed to find
turns out it was a rustic woven rind
covered up wit red wax
oooh, imabout to blow my loa'(d)
oh baby finish teh book, i simply must know
what's gonna happen in dat mansion
ma dix a monster of flesh expansion
like a tickin' clock or even a eurasian
cabbage corer, whatever teh fuck is
connie, all i know si i abot 2 JIZZ !
i aint no scientist, i aint no whizz
but i do know i got a nut on loan from hell
ima church steeple an all. my balls teh bell
dont mine me as i beat ma meat thru my pants
when i cum ima hafta take a wide stance
dont be scared, cuz when i blow i yell
ma cum is a consistancey not unlike gel
i fink i just "went past the sale"
but u get teh point
i jus' needa know how it ends
ma blu balls is given me teh bends
once ur done, connie i'ma be in heaven
for ordering information. please see page 47
awwwwww, yaaaaa
plummet
+0 -0
that was ballin
that was ballin
gato_enfermo
+0 -0
This was far more cogent than it deserves to be.
This was far more cogent than it deserves to be.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Proper.
Proper.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
*snaps fingers*
*snaps fingers*
srikamaraja
+0 -0
THIS. IS. RUUUDE!
THIS. IS. RUUUDE!
mirabeau
+0 -2
suggestion for Assetbar: An option to *Ignore Current Arc* would be nice.
suggestion for Assetbar: An option to *Ignore Current Arc* would be nice.
fancypants
+0 -0
Why, does this arc hit a little too close to home for you?
Why, does this arc hit a little too close to home for you?
jeffspaulding
+4 -0
Do you live near Ararat?
Do you live near Ararat?
mirabeau1
+0 -0
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
fancypants
+0 -0
Dude, that is harsh.
You compared quality Cornelius time to your plop-plops.
Retract.
Dude, that is harsh.
You compared quality Cornelius time to your plop-plops.
Retract.
mirabeau1
+0 -0
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
stereo
+0 -0
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn if you leave.
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn if you leave.
mirabeau1
+0 -0
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
am i supposed to giv shits? blow out ur ass
am i supposed to giv shits? blow out ur ass
mirabeau1
+0 -0
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
plummet
+0 -0
cool story, bro
cool story, bro
scottawesome
+0 -0
That's what she said
That's what she said
crom
+1 -0
Oh, you're using Twitter? That's your problem right there. Not everything in the world can be a vapid, 140-character shout for attention.
On the other hand, posting pics of a deuce sounds about right for the medium.
Oh, you're using Twitter? That's your problem right there. Not everything in the world can be a vapid, 140-character shout for attention.
On the other hand, posting pics of a deuce sounds about right for the medium.
fancypants
+0 -1
Twitter? Nah, I'm not really into Pokemon.
Twitter? Nah, I'm not really into Pokemon.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
I barely knew her
I barely knew her
shelbydavis
+0 -0
Correct.
Correct.
wolfensti
+1 -0
I wanna...
I wanna...
shelbydavis
+0 -0
Do you think it is rad to finish people's sentences, wolfensti?
Do you think it is rad to finish people's sentences, wolfensti?
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
cum
cum
epicurus
+0 -1
Yes yes yes oh yes, the perfect way to dismiss anything!
Yes yes yes oh yes, the perfect way to dismiss anything!
sherief
+3 -0
Tell someone from last year that you are going to "twit pic" your bowel movements and consider how that sounds.
Tell someone from last year that you are going to "twit pic" your bowel movements and consider how that sounds.
wolfensti
+0 -0
That would put your strip count to 0, nay ?
That would put your strip count to 0, nay ?
smilebuddha
+0 -0
How about we split the difference and I just ignore you?
How about we split the difference and I just ignore you?
gato_enfermo
+0 -0
How about we ignore the difference and I just split you?
How about we ignore the difference and I just split you?
gladi8orrex
+1 -0
about the split difference. we ignore you? how I
about the split difference. we ignore you? how I
plummet
+0 -0
And how I ignore you the difference. Split about.
And how I ignore you the difference. Split about.
sherief
+3 -0
In Soviet Russia, difference splits you!
In Soviet Russia, difference splits you!
mystkmanat
+0 -0
Sherief, I ain't seen you around before. But you know what? I like the cut of your jib.
Sherief, I ain't seen you around before. But you know what? I like the cut of your jib.
sherief
+0 -0
I would think a manatee (or lover thereof) would shy away from sailboat terminology, but the comment is well taken, nonetheless.
I would think a manatee (or lover thereof) would shy away from sailboat terminology, but the comment is well taken, nonetheless.
plummet
+1 -0
sherief don't like it
rock the casbah
rockin the casbah
sherief don't like it
rock the casbah
rockin the casbah
wolfensti
+1 -0
Rockin the can wait what
Rockin the can wait what
mystkmanat
+0 -1
Sailboats are manatee-violence free, luckily. It's those speedboats that tear up my brethren. Manatees have no natural predators-- except the motorized propeller.
Sailboats are manatee-violence free, luckily. It's those speedboats that tear up my brethren. Manatees have no natural predators-- except the motorized propeller.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Every time I see those little manatees, I want to cuddle their faces.
Every time I see those little manatees, I want to cuddle their faces.
vihil
+0 -0
"Tease the nubbin from it sugar pea" makes this a 5 for me.
"Tease the nubbin from it sugar pea" makes this a 5 for me.
epicurus
+0 -0
I looked up an image of a wheel of Manchego after this, and the nasty-ass rind did indeed put me off. If there were such a thing as the Machego-cheese obfuscator, it would actually work on me exactly as described in Cornelius' story.
Chris Onstad is some sort of quadruple-genius for inventing this product. I mean, I am literally floored by the perfection of this horrible product.
I looked up an image of a wheel of Manchego after this, and the nasty-ass rind did indeed put me off. If there were such a thing as the Machego-cheese obfuscator, it would actually work on me exactly as described in Cornelius' story.
Chris Onstad is some sort of quadruple-genius for inventing this product. I mean, I am literally floored by the perfection of this horrible product.
hatstand_mcq
+2 -0
I don't really see how you can call yourself Epicurus and then start bitching about (relatively) obscure cheese. Shouldn't you be eating a wedge of casu marzu between two slices of dolphin brain, while masturbating into an orphan's face?
I have read The Principal Doctrines, though I may not have fully understood all of them.
I don't really see how you can call yourself Epicurus and then start bitching about (relatively) obscure cheese. Shouldn't you be eating a wedge of casu marzu between two slices of dolphin brain, while masturbating into an orphan's face?
I have read The Principal Doctrines, though I may not have fully understood all of them.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
Epicureans are pussies
Epicureans are pussies
epicurus
+2 -0
For those of you who have an interest, you will see that Epicurus actually condemns the sort of hedonism usually associated with his name. The modern "Epicurean", a soccer mom with an armful of fifteen-dollar spice jars, bears no resemblance to the lifestyle advocated by Epicurus.
He advises the cultivation of sustainable, quiet pleasure, such as friendship, good books, art, love, enjoyable toil, etc.
Chocolate and dolphin-brain sandwiches are low on the list.
And if you don't like cheese that looks like an all-season tire, well then that's a-okay by Epicurus.
For those of you who have an interest, you will see that Epicurus actually condemns the sort of hedonism usually associated with his name. The modern "Epicurean", a soccer mom with an armful of fifteen-dollar spice jars, bears no resemblance to the lifestyle advocated by Epicurus.
He advises the cultivation of sustainable, quiet pleasure, such as friendship, good books, art, love, enjoyable toil, etc.
Chocolate and dolphin-brain sandwiches are low on the list.
And if you don't like cheese that looks like an all-season tire, well then that's a-okay by Epicurus.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
He Came To Teach Us Things.
He Came To Teach Us Things.
srikamaraja
+0 -0
I Came.
I Came.
stereo
+0 -0
I saw.
I saw.
jeffspaulding
+7 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
nice-on-water
+2 -0
Toooo sooooooon.
Toooo sooooooon.
octafish
+0 -0
Nice-On-Water is still smarting over the mothballing of concorde. Poor rich bastard.
Nice-On-Water is still smarting over the mothballing of concorde. Poor rich bastard.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Actually, funny story, well not really funny but it's a story and how else would I get you to read it if I didn't call it funny but anyway, I lived about 5 minutes from JFK before moving a few years ago and everyday like clockwork the Concorde would roar by, going to Heathrow (so not the French one). When they grounded the Concorde because (presumably) the French one's crash, I was actually kind of sad about that. People that lived directly over its path weren't, but I developed a kind of Pavlovian reaction to it; lots of times it would make me aware that it was about 6:00 and remind me that I was hungry for dinner. Ah nostalgia!
Actually, funny story, well not really funny but it's a story and how else would I get you to read it if I didn't call it funny but anyway, I lived about 5 minutes from JFK before moving a few years ago and everyday like clockwork the Concorde would roar by, going to Heathrow (so not the French one). When they grounded the Concorde because (presumably) the French one's crash, I was actually kind of sad about that. People that lived directly over its path weren't, but I developed a kind of Pavlovian reaction to it; lots of times it would make me aware that it was about 6:00 and remind me that I was hungry for dinner. Ah nostalgia!
gazdatronik
+0 -0
Yeah, probly one of the only examples of a DC-10 fucking up another plane, rather than fucking up on it's own.
Yeah, probly one of the only examples of a DC-10 fucking up another plane, rather than fucking up on it's own.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
No doubt more the fault of the FAA-"Approved" Celery Root Denuder.
No doubt more the fault of the FAA-"Approved" Celery Root Denuder.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
All of these things epicureans love are for people to weak to give in to the true light of hedonism. I can teach you. Come to my way of life. Bring lube.
All of these things epicureans love are for people to weak to give in to the true light of hedonism. I can teach you. Come to my way of life. Bring lube.
wolfensti
+0 -0
Bring the chocolate sauce, houuuuuuuhou
Bring the chocolate sauce, houuuuuuuhou
kharitonov
+0 -0
Am I the only one who thinks whoever wrote the Amazon description up there really hates Achewood?
"Literally littered the book with observations" is not a compliment, Mr. Onstad.
Am I the only one who thinks whoever wrote the Amazon description up there really hates Achewood?
"Literally littered the book with observations" is not a compliment, Mr. Onstad.
doppelganger
+5 -0
Beats the original wording of the blurb: "Literally shit the book through his sphincter."
Beats the original wording of the blurb: "Literally shit the book through his sphincter."
otter
+2 -0
Chris Onstad literally wrote a book of comics about talking cats.
Chris Onstad literally wrote a book of comics about talking cats.
neonfreon
+1 -0
Literally liberally littered the literature with little lascivious elucidations
Literally liberally littered the literature with little lascivious elucidations
gato_enfermo
+0 -0
You'll get a chubby this time. But it doesn't mean I like you.
You'll get a chubby this time. But it doesn't mean I like you.
hbaranov
+0 -0
It's okay, we all find you mildly malificent, a mithering mundane maelstrom of mediocrity. Moron.
It's okay, we all find you mildly malificent, a mithering mundane maelstrom of mediocrity. Moron.
dezufnocosem
+0 -0
Quote:
Quote:
lascivious elucidator
Don't you dare call Onstad that again until he has looked it up!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i thought the term was cute.
i thought the term was cute.
xi
+1 -0
Is Ray shivering with antici.
.
.
.
Pation?
Is Ray shivering with antici.
.
.
.
Pation?
daidai
+0 -0
...what?
...what?
xi
+2 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
octafish
+0 -0
You know, in just seven days I can make you a man.
You know, in just seven days I can make you a man.
jeffspaulding
+2 -0
I can make you a curry in about 15 minutes.
I can make you a curry in about 15 minutes.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
That's pretty impressive, actually.
That's pretty impressive, actually.
plummet
+0 -0
I can make noodle soup in 5
I can make noodle soup in 5
xi
+0 -0
Could you make me a Tim Curry in the same amount of time? Because I'd be very much into that. (But will take food-curry gratefully.)
Could you make me a Tim Curry in the same amount of time? Because I'd be very much into that. (But will take food-curry gratefully.)
doppelganger
+0 -0
He hasn't come out, but I think that Mr. Curry is not too into women (if you know what I mean).
BTW -- beautifully understated performance as the Russian sub doctor in The Hunt for Red October .
He hasn't come out, but I think that Mr. Curry is not too into women (if you know what I mean).
BTW -- beautifully understated performance as the Russian sub doctor in The Hunt for Red October .
xi
+0 -0
I don't mind. I have no issue taking my Tim Curry to a cottage I have built for the two of us and providing him with boytoy after boytoy. As long as I can hang out and he talks to me.
Allll I need is for Tim Curry to say things to me.
I don't mind. I have no issue taking my Tim Curry to a cottage I have built for the two of us and providing him with boytoy after boytoy. As long as I can hang out and he talks to me.
Allll I need is for Tim Curry to say things to me.
octafish
+0 -0
We all float down here?
We all float down here?
narenial
+0 -0
Rather . . .
We'll all float on okay. . .
Rather . . .
We'll all float on okay. . .
mirabeau1
+0 -0
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
Comment left by mirabeau1 ignored.
sherief
+1 -0
Summary : There is no reason not to eat poor kids.
Summary : There is no reason not to eat poor kids.
wozzeck
+0 -0
Here, here.
Here, here.
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Don't be modest, that's a wonderful proposal.
Don't be modest, that's a wonderful proposal.
doppelganger
+2 -0
Oh, you're Swift.
Oh, you're Swift.
smilebuddha
+0 -0
I'm just a spectator in all of this.
I'm just a spectator in all of this.
shelbydavis
+1 -0
I suppose I can steel myself to the eating of children, but if the birthrate is to fall how can I ever add a son?
Wow, that's a stretch. Sorry, folks.
I suppose I can steel myself to the eating of children, but if the birthrate is to fall how can I ever add a son?
Wow, that's a stretch. Sorry, folks.
drcharlesburney
+0 -0
HELLA RAD COMMENT BRO
HELLA RAD COMMENT BRO
plummet
+0 -0
bro, cool story
bro, cool story
plummet
+0 -0
holy shit chubby
holy shit chubby
aperson
+0 -0
[comment that shows I am aware of the cultural reference]
[comment that shows I am aware of the cultural reference]
aperson
+1 -0
Dammit!!!
CULTURALREFERENCECODE!!!
Dammit!!!
CULTURALREFERENCECODE!!!
doppelganger
+0 -0
[meta][IMGS OFF][/meta]
[meta][IMGS OFF][/meta]
randyleepublic
+0 -0
$60 is serious lite.
$60 is serious lite.
neonfreon
+0 -0
i figure it's somehow related to the cost of a hand job
i figure it's somehow related to the cost of a hand job
doppelganger
+0 -0
That's a bit steep for a HJ.
Supply and Demand keeps the price down (most people have a couple of hands "on hand" all the time).
That's a bit steep for a HJ.
Supply and Demand keeps the price down (most people have a couple of hands "on hand" all the time).
neonfreon
+0 -0
are you claiming to have personal knowledge of the price of a hand job?
are you claiming to have personal knowledge of the price of a hand job?
doppelganger
+0 -0
My comment was more from an economics perspective.
Although I remember that the crack whores queued-up at the entrance to the Holland Tunnel could be rented for less than $15 (not that I ever partook of such activity - if I'm gonna pay, its gotta be full service [$180-$250, NYC rate]).
My comment was more from an economics perspective.
Although I remember that the crack whores queued-up at the entrance to the Holland Tunnel could be rented for less than $15 (not that I ever partook of such activity - if I'm gonna pay, its gotta be full service [$180-$250, NYC rate]).
nice-on-water
+0 -0
5 for a throw, 15 for all night?
5 for a throw, 15 for all night?
doppelganger
+0 -0
The tunnel girls would just reach into your car. It was drive-through service (you didn't even lose your spot in the line for the tunnel).
For another 2 bucks, you could get a squeegee man for a threesome.
The tunnel girls would just reach into your car. It was drive-through service (you didn't even lose your spot in the line for the tunnel).
For another 2 bucks, you could get a squeegee man for a threesome.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Sorry, I was making a reference that I thought was well-known enough. I'm...so sorry.
Sorry, I was making a reference that I thought was well-known enough. I'm...so sorry.
machineelf
+0 -0
250 in nevada, but shit's more expensive when it's legal. you're paying for the lady to get regular checkups, gym membership, etc. it's a whole classy thing. in nevada.
250 in nevada, but shit's more expensive when it's legal. you're paying for the lady to get regular checkups, gym membership, etc. it's a whole classy thing. in nevada.
doppelganger
+0 -0
Who needs gym membership when you got crack. All the low-end NYC hookers are thin as rails. (Its always a turn-on when you can see your joint poking out her skin)
Who needs gym membership when you got crack. All the low-end NYC hookers are thin as rails. (Its always a turn-on when you can see your joint poking out her skin)
machineelf
+3 -0
[IMGS OFF] Chubby for this strip! 5!
[IMGS OFF] Chubby for this strip! 5!
doppelganger
+1 -0
Ah, the good old days when "love children" were called "bastards."
Ah, the good old days when "love children" were called "bastards."
tekende
+0 -0
I really like that the girl depicted here is rather thin despite the advertisement being for clothing for larger girls.
I really like that the girl depicted here is rather thin despite the advertisement being for clothing for larger girls.
gladi8orrex
+0 -1
chubby women r disgustin'. this has always been teh case
chubby women r disgustin'. this has always been teh case
crom
+7 -0
NO. You are incorrect.
[IMGS OFF]
NO. You are incorrect.
[IMGS OFF]
crom
+0 -0
That, by the way, is the Aphrodite Kallipygos, which literally translates to: Aphrodite of the fine ass.
That, by the way, is the Aphrodite Kallipygos, which literally translates to: Aphrodite of the fine ass.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
Crom smashes the dead archetype of the 'ideal' female body shape with a piece of well proportioned classical statuary engaged in lusty anasyrma.
Crom smashes the dead archetype of the 'ideal' female body shape with a piece of well proportioned classical statuary engaged in lusty anasyrma.
stereo
+0 -0
I gotta admit that is fine- ass statuary.
I gotta admit that is fine- ass statuary.
falseprophet
+0 -0
The Greeks knew that sometimes you do not want a lady to get naked. Sometimes you just want them to remove the obstruction to the hole you want to put it in.
The Greeks knew that sometimes you do not want a lady to get naked. Sometimes you just want them to remove the obstruction to the hole you want to put it in.
doppelganger
+3 -1
And by that you mean removing her son's britches.
And by that you mean removing her son's britches.
octafish
+0 -0
Classic "Does my bum look big in this?" pose. But she ain't chubby. I... I can't be bothered google image searching Peter Reubens, but we all know it is out there.
Classic "Does my bum look big in this?" pose. But she ain't chubby. I... I can't be bothered google image searching Peter Reubens, but we all know it is out there.
octafish
+0 -0
P.S. make sure you search for Peter Reubens and not Paul Reubens.
P.S. make sure you search for Peter Reubens and not Paul Reubens.
plummet
+1 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
nice-on-water
+0 -0
"Here it is."
"Here it is."
tekende
+0 -0
This is not a chubby woman.
This is not a chubby woman.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
[Ed McMahon] YOU ARE CORRECT, SIR.
it is a statue.
[/Ed McMahon]
[Ed McMahon] YOU ARE CORRECT, SIR.
it is a statue.
[/Ed McMahon]
tekende
+0 -0
Well met, sir.
Well met, sir.
narenial
+0 -0
ooh baby . . .
ooh baby . . .
narenial
+3 -0
[IMGS OFF]
ooh baby . . .
edit: damn you, BBcode!
[IMGS OFF]
ooh baby . . .
edit: damn you, BBcode!
neonfreon
+0 -0
"feministphilosophers" just screams sexy
"feministphilosophers" just screams sexy
doppelganger
+1 -0
"feminist" just screams.
"feminist" just screams.
gazdatronik
+0 -0
Who is that luscious 16th century painting of a woman?
Who is that luscious 16th century painting of a woman?
narenial
+0 -0
If you're referring to the image I put up, that's a yogurt commercial somewhere. Hell, I'd hit it, and I don't do women.
If you're referring to the image I put up, that's a yogurt commercial somewhere. Hell, I'd hit it, and I don't do women.
gazdatronik
+0 -0
My GF looks like that...Not so much in the face, but still she's chunktech hotness...I must buy roses now in which to remove pedals
My GF looks like that...Not so much in the face, but still she's chunktech hotness...I must buy roses now in which to remove pedals
xiaomimi
+2 -0
This image has severely failed at not turning me on.
This image has severely failed at not turning me on.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid. I've made a lot of special modifications myself.
She made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs...
She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid. I've made a lot of special modifications myself.
She made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs...
plummet
+0 -0
i gabe this a chubby because it gabe me one
i gabe this a chubby because it gabe me one
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Are you sure it's not a chubby your momma gabe you?
Are you sure it's not a chubby your momma gabe you?
plummet
+0 -0
daddy would be mad if that happened
daddy would be mad if that happened
mirabeau2
+0 -0
Comment left by mirabeau2 ignored.
Comment left by mirabeau2 ignored.
narenial
+0 -0
as a chubby, this ad hurts my sensibilities.
We too can wear A-lines, dammit!
as a chubby, this ad hurts my sensibilities.
We too can wear A-lines, dammit!
tekende
+0 -0
What's an A-line?
What's an A-line?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Nothing like an A-Punk.
Nothing like an A-Punk.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
It is best lie told on smoothest flamenco guitar with candle light.
It is best lie told on smoothest flamenco guitar with candle light.
woodenteeth
+4 -0
Ray was dissapointed to receive:
... dissapointed and feeling every 56 of her years Judi Wright-Branch watched as Carter Thayer III, heir to millions with the delicious carriage of a true thoroughbred, wiped himself off on a nearby $400 blouse. Some of his semen was still on her hand as he hurried out the door. They had gotten as far as a hand down his pants.
She had a moment of pity for her daughter.
Ray was dissapointed to receive:
... dissapointed and feeling every 56 of her years Judi Wright-Branch watched as Carter Thayer III, heir to millions with the delicious carriage of a true thoroughbred, wiped himself off on a nearby $400 blouse. Some of his semen was still on her hand as he hurried out the door. They had gotten as far as a hand down his pants.
She had a moment of pity for her daughter.
mr-siegal
+0 -0
Can I have his cheese?
Can I have his cheese?
gazdatronik
+0 -0
No. She will need the cheese for comfort after such a display.
No. She will need the cheese for comfort after such a display.
indoorsman
+0 -0
I wouldn't put it past that crafty Cornelius. We already know how much he likes to hustle Ray.
I wouldn't put it past that crafty Cornelius. We already know how much he likes to hustle Ray.
wolfensti
+0 -0
Guys of Assetbar, some scientist have created human sperm from source cells.
The age of the amazones is nigh upon us ! We have been replaced ! We are now useless for the man-eating amazones. Loneal is smiling in her no-man-allowed fort !
Guys of Assetbar, some scientist have created human sperm from source cells.
The age of the amazones is nigh upon us ! We have been replaced ! We are now useless for the man-eating amazones. Loneal is smiling in her no-man-allowed fort !
octafish
+1 -0
The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life to poison the Earth with a plague of men, as once it was, but the gun shoots death, and purifies the Earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth . . . and kill!
The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life to poison the Earth with a plague of men, as once it was, but the gun shoots death, and purifies the Earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth . . . and kill!
cromar
+0 -0
Wanna go to second level?
Wanna go to second level?
doppelganger
+0 -0
Quote:
[IMGS OFF]
Quote:
The age of the calzones is nigh upon us!
[IMGS OFF]
cromar
+1 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
Let's be specific about this. Some male scientists have created human sperm from stem cells.
Actually I'm totally cool with men being replaced. As long as we aren't actually hunted for sport I'd be pretty relaxed about a future involving me smoking cigarettes and reading on the patio, while women work in offices and impregnate each other with artificial sperm.
Let's be specific about this. Some male scientists have created human sperm from stem cells.
Actually I'm totally cool with men being replaced. As long as we aren't actually hunted for sport I'd be pretty relaxed about a future involving me smoking cigarettes and reading on the patio, while women work in offices and impregnate each other with artificial sperm.
tekende
+0 -0
Why would we get to lounge around and do nothing?
Why would we get to lounge around and do nothing?
cancer
+0 -0
Because this is his fantasy.
Because this is his fantasy.
wolfensti
+0 -0
Clearly he want to be the last man on earth, but even then he would not even get some play.
Clearly he want to be the last man on earth, but even then he would not even get some play.
cancer
+0 -0
It's a lame fantasy.
It's a lame fantasy.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
Stop being a dick about my fantasy! I am actually pretty offended.
Stop being a dick about my fantasy! I am actually pretty offended.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
jam
jam
The alt-text made the reference quote so we didn't have to.
Girls who like boys, who eat cheese, like...
etc.
I know what boys like.
I know what boys like.
I know what boys like.
Boys. Like. Cheese.
My gouda brings all the boys to the yard
Yes but all the boys are sweaty Frenchmen.
Wat een domme Engelsman.
Manchego, eet eez fowr zuh, 'ow yew sey, roosticks.
[IMGS OFF]
Remember when this kind of thing was "savage," "sensual" and "shocking"?
Now I can't watch Nick Jr. without some interracial sex.
And there even some on the TV!
[IMGS OFF]
That oughta make the anti-miscegenationists happy.
Inter-racial relationships are cool, but that rind is unconscionable.
If only there was some way to obfuscate it.
[IMGS OFF]
Last permutation, promise:
[IMGS OFF]
Hey, why is the white women expecting to be "cored" by the black gentleman, whilst the Black woman expects a grating experience from the white guy?
.
[IMGS OFF]
I'm not changing my avaricon just for this joke.
Guys, let me tell a joke. Please?
A comment left by sick_cat was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by MelloClello, Deusoma, BuffaloButt, Vee, pmbarrett, Vadun, Madoushi)
I heartily endorse this product or event.
So now I can be just as annoying as sick_cat?
sign me up!
you think just because you're on the internet you can rip off my avatar. bitch. stop it. now!
Yes.
Fuck you.
No.
Now give it up for my best friend, *Mr. Black*.
Why'd you link that to me? I read every strip in a bona fide manner. (Plus, I don't have enough RAM to open even one of those links without a crash.)
NewEgg.com has $3 envelope shipping for relatively small orders.
Everyone should read achewood all the way through 6 times.
Once for the initial "What this silliness now?"
Once with the context of all the strips, and you realize you've missed stuff.
Once to read the alttext in context with the strips
Once to appreciate the first few assetbar posts, especially back in the day when the first dozen or so were all gold.
Once for reading the entire thread, or else you might miss some Manflesh posts.
Once more after you've done all that, just to enjoy the comic by itself again.
Take your weakass game (or weak assgame), dump it in a ditch, and read them through the whole thing again like a real player. You may have a number by your name but you don't deserve the title of connoisseur.
A comment left by gato_enfermo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by MelloClello, Wolfensti, plummet, newspaperdrone, mistlethrush, hoarday4, gmontag)
Gato_enfermo has taken trolling to new depths. Avatar theft was a strong opening move, but to follow it up with a robot that reads comics for you , and then being SMUG about it, is just a masterstroke.
Chapeau, monsieur.
Quote:
Epicurus has jumped the Snark.
Nah he didn't steal the avatar - these seemingly myriad trolls are all the same eternal, invincible* super-troll underneath.
*well, persistent.
Sorry, trolling is an addiction. As part of my cure I tried to delete my multiple accounts. Unfortunately, I couldn't figure out how to do that. So I now scatter them to the wind:
p/w: password
p/w: password
p/w: password
p/w: password
p/w: password
p/w: password
p/w: password
Somebody please change the passwords so these accounts become dead to me.
I can't help myself!
Don't forget me: p/w: password
You too can be a Mensch.
But don't worry, I'll still be around . . .
Note that Mensch and PrisonerX are at "connoisseur" status.
Hurry, while supplies last.
Oh, and:
p/w: breastman
But I like the mensch! The other guys are dicks.
Get the passwords reset, delete the reset confirmation emails without reading them.
Remove the head or destroy the brain.
And two for flinching!
Does it still count if you do all this before you make your account?
The .gif that you have for an avatar haunts my nightmares, and for that you get a chubby. No, I don't know how this works either.
I would argue that although it is no longer "savage", "sensual" or "shocking", it happens just as much on TV and movies. It's not denied anymore, just neglected - the main character, when not the Straight White Dude, is the Straight White Chick. I want to see some ebony ramming and/or getting rammed by some ivory a bit more often in areas OUTSIDE of porn.
And while we're dealing with ebony and ivory, why not throw in some bixbite and nunutak and, uh, uh, corundum? Fuck, I'm out of geological metaphors.
Okay, get back to talking about cheese now.
Neither ebony or ivory are minerals, as you seem to be suggesting.
Sorry, that was a bit brusque wasn't it? I'm all hungover and short tempered, and I apologise.
Ivory is bone and ebony is wood. Nyah ha ha ha!
Yes, I realise both of these truths, assholes , but minerals were the next logical step for racial metaphors. If you can think of bone and wood metaphors for the common racial taxonomies, I'd like to hear them.
Bone and wood...ba ha ha ha!
You'll have to forgive me, they pumped me full of anesthetics and painkillers today.
Ik bedoel, serieus. Wat de fak.
Have some cheese with STRUCTURE.
i'm down with that
Slap some manchego obfuscator on them and they look as good as any non-french.
...and what's so wrong with girls liking boys, anyway? Why, I remember a time when couples actually got to LIKE each other before making each other's genitals swell until the point where they could do something about it! If I could have written a song that describes the best feeling on earth, it would be I Know What Boys Like . Good job, Chris Butler. Good job, sir.
Harrumph!
I really enjoy making out and heavy petting - but these modern girls always want more.
You must be firm with them, jeffspaulding. You must make them understand that your Special Purpose is not just some penny-arcade joy-stick, to be used and left by any dimestore harlot with a wooden nickel to her name!
My wife thinks that she has got a right to my seed (I think she does it to keep me faithful - as if I couldn't make more if I needed to).
you should also take heed of the two-bit whore. additionally be wary of the less common, feminist, Susan B. Anthony dollar piece skank.
Some have said she was weaned on chicken milk and cocaine
Women Who Love Men Who Love Drugs
But not the xkcd reference!
I didn't realize Connie was into hot ass-love.
I didn't realise Cornelius' mouth could achieve the shape shown in panel 7!
Actually, the split upper lip is a little disturbing, especially making its appearance at this late stage...
This might be the third time that Connie has opened his mouth.
Or not. But I think the number is pretty small if you exclude strips containing Polly.