socks
+0 -0
A comment left by socks was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Sakana, _cheesekayke, aperson)
A comment left by socks was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Sakana, _cheesekayke, aperson)
deimosrising
+0 -0
A comment left by deimosrising was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by littlecat, novacaine, giantants)
A comment left by deimosrising was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by littlecat, novacaine, giantants)
alejandroadam
+10 -0
I know at least two people like Ray. they can pick up a banjo and be good at it, and basically anything else, but when you have to fill up in a ruff area of town, they make it a bigger problem. involving many onlookers
I know at least two people like Ray. they can pick up a banjo and be good at it, and basically anything else, but when you have to fill up in a ruff area of town, they make it a bigger problem. involving many onlookers
aperson
+3 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
fineoakstructure
+1 -0
ruff! ruff!
ruff! ruff!
ttagxamm
+56 -0
I like to think that Ray's reading started off with him making airquotes as he spoke the title. Then he said 'Copyright Ray Smuckles, 2005' aloud before the first line.
I like to think that Ray's reading started off with him making airquotes as he spoke the title. Then he said 'Copyright Ray Smuckles, 2005' aloud before the first line.
tekende
+3 -0
There is no way this is not true.
There is no way this is not true.
cracklewater
+0 -0
Ray does not know what the phrase 'toe the line' means.
Ray does not know what the phrase 'toe the line' means.
lizjones
+6 -0
Beef gets his sass on in panel two.
Beef gets his sass on in panel two.
nicolae
+3 -0
The italics give it a sinister air.
The italics give it a sinister air.
peterjoel
+9 -0
Beef will not be castigated.
Beef will not be castigated.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
...dogg.
...dogg.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
Beef gets around and is way creative for a cat with nuclear depression.
Beef gets around and is way creative for a cat with nuclear depression.
dcofosho224
+0 -0
i would buy a panel 2 tee shirt
i would buy a panel 2 tee shirt
anomalous3
+6 -0
I am puzzled. I do not yet understand beef's fixation with concealed weapons in food
I am puzzled. I do not yet understand beef's fixation with concealed weapons in food
madnes
+8 -2
I think Beef has an eating disorder. He doesn't really like meals and often forgets to eat. Poor kitty.
I think Beef has an eating disorder. He doesn't really like meals and often forgets to eat. Poor kitty.
aelindil
+7 -0
He, Roast Beef, does not like life.
He, Roast Beef, does not like life.
echidnaboy
+10 -0
"Hot Dogs"
by R. Beef Kazenzakis
A hot dog is whipped meat
the skin yields a snap.
The flavor unmistakable
the condiments eternal.
Ketchup, mustard,
ground onions and kraut,
pepperoncini, tomato,
all flavor the snout.
But inside the foodstuff
a hidden ink pen
single-shot .45 Magnum
hidden in the pen.
OH SHIIIIIIIT
"Hot Dogs"
by R. Beef Kazenzakis
A hot dog is whipped meat
the skin yields a snap.
The flavor unmistakable
the condiments eternal.
Ketchup, mustard,
ground onions and kraut,
pepperoncini, tomato,
all flavor the snout.
But inside the foodstuff
a hidden ink pen
single-shot .45 Magnum
hidden in the pen.
OH SHIIIIIIIT
untilyouaresonude
+1 -0
Ray's got a way with words, that's for sure.
Ray's got a way with words, that's for sure.
saint
+3 -2
my car has been shot
my car has been shot
djwhiterabbit
+2 -0
can anyone explain "why you so down at the corners of your slice" to me?
i just got hit by a very fast slow-pitch softball.
can anyone explain "why you so down at the corners of your slice" to me?
i just got hit by a very fast slow-pitch softball.
babachewy
+13 -0
The slice is his mouth, so being down at the corners of your slice means you are frowning.
The slice is his mouth, so being down at the corners of your slice means you are frowning.
natashamarie
+1 -0
some classic "ohhhhhhh shiiiiiiiiiiiit"
some classic "ohhhhhhh shiiiiiiiiiiiit"
heavymetaljesus
+11 -0
"Dogg do not castigate me" is equal or almost equal to "Dogg don't piss on me I just invented photoshop" in it's hilarity.
"Dogg do not castigate me" is equal or almost equal to "Dogg don't piss on me I just invented photoshop" in it's hilarity.
redmad
+0 -0
So... so is he like shouting 'ohhhhh shiiiiit' or just kind of whispering it?
So... so is he like shouting 'ohhhhh shiiiiit' or just kind of whispering it?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i usually hear it as yelling.
but just now i imagined it going from whispering to a medium-loud voice and that works really nicely, too.
i usually hear it as yelling.
but just now i imagined it going from whispering to a medium-loud voice and that works really nicely, too.
lucid
+1 -0
I hear it as a stressed whisper. The way he comes close to the mic, and the manner in which it is used - When you suddenly realise the terrible truth.
ohhhhhhh
shiiiiiiiiiiiit
I hear it as a stressed whisper. The way he comes close to the mic, and the manner in which it is used - When you suddenly realise the terrible truth.
ohhhhhhh
shiiiiiiiiiiiit
rotavele
+10 -0
I always figured beefs poetry is because his grandma always told him everything was gonna make him die, like how he was scared to go in a lake in case there was an earthquake. So he writes about how a pepper mill has been fashioned into an explosive device.
I always figured beefs poetry is because his grandma always told him everything was gonna make him die, like how he was scared to go in a lake in case there was an earthquake. So he writes about how a pepper mill has been fashioned into an explosive device.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
i vote for this one. hes paranoid. like a mofo.
i vote for this one. hes paranoid. like a mofo.
spinynorman
+28 -1
I had to sit through something like this once at a performance art gallery. Some asshat in a yellow bedsheet read about colors while a dude played a guitar with a cello bow. They had free beer though, and I wound up double fisting lager through the whole thing and started quietly beatboxing along to the song myself and didn't notice until I realized how mad everyone else in the bleachers looked.
Good times.
I had to sit through something like this once at a performance art gallery. Some asshat in a yellow bedsheet read about colors while a dude played a guitar with a cello bow. They had free beer though, and I wound up double fisting lager through the whole thing and started quietly beatboxing along to the song myself and didn't notice until I realized how mad everyone else in the bleachers looked.
Good times.
molesticide
+17 -0
dude i love to beatbox
nobody around me EVER loves that i beatbox
HOW COME
dude i love to beatbox
nobody around me EVER loves that i beatbox
HOW COME
phthoggos
+0 -0
True.
True.
gumfish
+0 -0
I love beatboxing, but I'm so crap at it. I can't make anything of it sound right, yet I still manage to use every opportunity I get to embarrass myself with it. Good fun.
I love beatboxing, but I'm so crap at it. I can't make anything of it sound right, yet I still manage to use every opportunity I get to embarrass myself with it. Good fun.
biznart
+0 -0
Probably because they do not like to be spit upon and such.
Probably because they do not like to be spit upon and such.
laserblade
+1 -0
You are what I want to be when I grow up. Even though you're only half a decade older than me. Spiny Norman, you have lived .
You are what I want to be when I grow up. Even though you're only half a decade older than me. Spiny Norman, you have lived .
clintisiceman
+0 -0
I just love how Ray took to time to copyright the poem he had just written that afternoon before going to perform it at open mic night.
I just love how Ray took to time to copyright the poem he had just written that afternoon before going to perform it at open mic night.
twohundredninety
+2 -0
In the United States, at least, copyright is automatic. You don't even have to do anything. You can go to trouble to document priority or something if you really want, but all you have to do in order to own the copyright on something is make it.
In the United States, at least, copyright is automatic. You don't even have to do anything. You can go to trouble to document priority or something if you really want, but all you have to do in order to own the copyright on something is make it.
clintisiceman
+4 -0
That is insane. I will insult the system to draw attention from my ignorance.
That is insane. I will insult the system to draw attention from my ignorance.
decagon
+1 -0
"water-clad nymphs" -> automatic 5
"water-clad nymphs" -> automatic 5
falseprophet
+2 -0
Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em.
Also, when you cheat on them, they drown you with their prom dress.
Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em.
Also, when you cheat on them, they drown you with their prom dress.
tellumo
+8 -0
and then Ophelia and the Lady of Shalott giggle as they talk smack about you at lunch.
and then Ophelia and the Lady of Shalott giggle as they talk smack about you at lunch.
sirptom
+1 -0
I enjoy that Ray is wearing a pilgrim outfit to match his poem's title.
I enjoy that Ray is wearing a pilgrim outfit to match his poem's title.
charchar
+2 -0
He is from...HISTORY!
He is from...HISTORY!
xiaomimi
+18 -0
Weekend Blogs
Ray: Treasure.
Today's Blogs
Philippe: I think a person died!
Onstad: [urlhttps://chrisonstad.blogspot.com/2005/04/first-words.html]First words[/url]
Weekend Blogs
Ray: Treasure.
Today's Blogs
Philippe: I think a person died!
Onstad: [urlhttps://chrisonstad.blogspot.com/2005/04/first-words.html]First words[/url]
xiaomimi
+18 -0
Aw LAME
Onstad: First words
Aw LAME
Onstad: First words
mattylite
+0 -0
Ray uses "Clooneying" as a verb.
Ray uses "Clooneying" as a verb.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Your excellent track record saves you, worry not.
Your excellent track record saves you, worry not.
drago25
+0 -0
Puritan Ray is deep, man
Puritan Ray is deep, man
banzairabbit
+0 -0
I wonder if Laszlo's is a reference to "Lazlo's Career" by Moxy Fruvous.
I wonder if Laszlo's is a reference to "Lazlo's Career" by Moxy Fruvous.
direhaggis
+18 -0
Land where my fathers died,
Land of the Pilgrim's pride,
From every mountain side,
Let freedom ring.
My car has been shot.
Land where my fathers died,
Land of the Pilgrim's pride,
From every mountain side,
Let freedom ring.
My car has been shot.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
oh that i had a chubby for you.
you being given my first virtual chubby in a long, long while.
oh that i had a chubby for you.
you being given my first virtual chubby in a long, long while.
layzerblade
+5 -0
So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania!
Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!
Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!
But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia!
Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!
Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.
And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"
But not today.
My car has been shot.
So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania!
Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!
Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!
But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia!
Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!
Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.
And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"
But not today.
My car has been shot.
apricotta
+1 -0
Ray is so upset he speaks in a smaller font, just like Beef.
Ray is so upset he speaks in a smaller font, just like Beef.
mustakrakesh
+0 -0
I have to say that I have been down in the corners of my slice before, You have to break through Ray. A list of things that you are grateful for is always helpful.
I have to say that I have been down in the corners of my slice before, You have to break through Ray. A list of things that you are grateful for is always helpful.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
laszlo, or lazlow?
laszlo, or lazlow?
sp1derbaby
+0 -0
Lazlow... that's a clown's name. A stupid clown.
Lazlow... that's a clown's name. A stupid clown.
invidious
+0 -0
Lazlow, the clown with Down Syndrome!
Lazlow, the clown with Down Syndrome!
carlyle
+0 -0
The Downs Clown.
The Downs Clown... Posse?
The Downs Clown.
The Downs Clown... Posse?
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
theyre the ones that wear make-up and talk about assaulting women, right?
theyre the ones that wear make-up and talk about assaulting women, right?
carlyle
+0 -0
Ray, stay away from the beach!
Ray, stay away from the beach!
lolsworth
+0 -0
My first album will be called The Blossom's Accomplice.
My first album will be called The Blossom's Accomplice.
is honk a slang term for a shot or a brand new unit of alcohol? i would totally buy a honk glass regardless.
I think a honk in this case is a shot or a slug of booze. Not a new unit, just slang for during Serious Booze Time.
I imagine it to be closer to a snort.