deimosrising
+5 -0
Will we ever know the story of Darlene? Probably not
Will we ever know the story of Darlene? Probably not
flazisismuss
+1 -0
I'm normally in favor of the unexplained or semi-explained backstory... but here, the community needs to know. Who is Darlene?
I'm normally in favor of the unexplained or semi-explained backstory... but here, the community needs to know. Who is Darlene?
c_dizzle
+0 -0
Alt text always spackles most of the cracks.
Alt text always spackles most of the cracks.
girlandagun
+4 -0
I think we all know what happened to Darlene. She ended it around 3:30 AM one night, pink press-on nails clawing the air and screeching. She had spent the evening purchasing him double-shots of Liquid Banjo, and he had promptly repaid her by vomiting it directly back into her red patent-leather purse. Her cell phone number worked or smelled the same, and Lyle never met another broad who would buy him a double-shot of anything.
I think we all know what happened to Darlene. She ended it around 3:30 AM one night, pink press-on nails clawing the air and screeching. She had spent the evening purchasing him double-shots of Liquid Banjo, and he had promptly repaid her by vomiting it directly back into her red patent-leather purse. Her cell phone number worked or smelled the same, and Lyle never met another broad who would buy him a double-shot of anything.
girlandagun
+11 -0
I think we all know the story of Darlene. She left around 3:30 AM one night, pink nails clawing the air, screeching at Lyle, who had passed out and soiled himself. She had spent the better part of the night buying him double-shots of Liquid Banjo, and he had promptly repaid her by vomiting them directly into her patent-leather purse. Her cell never worked or smelled the same, and he never did meet another broad who would buy him shots of anything.
I think we all know the story of Darlene. She left around 3:30 AM one night, pink nails clawing the air, screeching at Lyle, who had passed out and soiled himself. She had spent the better part of the night buying him double-shots of Liquid Banjo, and he had promptly repaid her by vomiting them directly into her patent-leather purse. Her cell never worked or smelled the same, and he never did meet another broad who would buy him shots of anything.
roastbeet
+12 -0
Darlene from Roseanne? Aka Sarah Gilbert? I say yes.
Darlene from Roseanne? Aka Sarah Gilbert? I say yes.
zeroasalimit
+1 -0
Why does she have to be a lesbian. :'(
Why does she have to be a lesbian. :'(
evolume
+0 -0
She got her nose did recently.
She got her nose did recently.
zeroasalimit
+5 -0
She can give me a nose job anyday. ;)
NASAL FETISH!
She can give me a nose job anyday. ;)
NASAL FETISH!
vreeeee
+43 -0
NASALINGUS. NOUN. MEANS KISSING A NOSE WITH THE MOUTH.
NASALINGUS. NOUN. MEANS KISSING A NOSE WITH THE MOUTH.
norsef
+0 -1
I don't think it's lips he'd be using.
I don't think it's lips he'd be using.
deusoma
+5 -0
It's kind of hard to kiss with your penis.
Trust me.
I know.
It's kind of hard to kiss with your penis.
Trust me.
I know.
retinarow
+0 -0
yeah seriously dude gross.
yeah seriously dude gross.
dusty
+1 -0
only if you're circumcised.
only if you're circumcised.
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
the joke is that there are two holes.
the joke is that there are two holes.
makkuwata
+0 -0
Yeah, I'm pretty sure Lyle is mourning her character's death in the second season of 24. The dates match.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure Lyle is mourning her character's death in the second season of 24. The dates match.
pascal
+0 -1
And is he crying because of the hat?
And is he crying because of the hat?
kledermans
+0 -0
That would make it a lot funnier.
That would make it a lot funnier.
havenless
+2 -0
I guess this explains Lyle's alcoholism. kinda. sorta.
I guess this explains Lyle's alcoholism. kinda. sorta.
bixschmix
+0 -0
Lyle's alcoholism can never and will never be explained.
Lyle's alcoholism can never and will never be explained.
spinynorman
+0 -0
Don't forget Darlene.
Don't forget Darlene.
caseyb3
+0 -0
That's why he has the hat
That's why he has the hat
dovey
+0 -0
Lyle really enjoys getting drunk.
I can empathise with his situation.
Lyle really enjoys getting drunk.
I can empathise with his situation.
chaesar
+13 -2
Darlene was the name of his gorilla girlfriend, in his pro-gorilla days.
Darlene was the name of his gorilla girlfriend, in his pro-gorilla days.
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
you gonna get hit by the Lame Train once people decide to find this comic again.
you gonna get hit by the Lame Train once people decide to find this comic again.
deancain29
+0 -0
A comment left by deancain29 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by LuckyG, Boyd, morbo)
A comment left by deancain29 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by LuckyG, Boyd, morbo)
zem
+0 -0
is Cornelius giving the thumbs-up?
is Cornelius giving the thumbs-up?
qatipay
+1 -0
perhaps putting his hand over his mouth in happy surprise?
perhaps putting his hand over his mouth in happy surprise?
dennycrane
+1 -0
I always thought it was a lighly-amused chuckle. I think he did the same thing here . In any case, it's the best kind of British thing to do?
I always thought it was a lighly-amused chuckle. I think he did the same thing here . In any case, it's the best kind of British thing to do?
spectre
+1 -2
Alt text: "People mourn losses in different ways. This is his way. He still wears a hat for her."
Alt text: "People mourn losses in different ways. This is his way. He still wears a hat for her."
blastradius
+2 -0
Lyle has a hat-on for Darlene?
Lyle has a hat-on for Darlene?
soilentshuggah
+0 -0
Ray, Lyle, Cornelius & Teodor favorite Achewood characters.
Ray, Lyle, Cornelius & Teodor favorite Achewood characters.
gussiejives
+2 -1
The irony of Philippe wearing a mortarboard is just too poignant.
The irony of Philippe wearing a mortarboard is just too poignant.
dreamerman91
+0 -1
One of the great sight gags in the strip's history
One of the great sight gags in the strip's history
cousinted
+1 -1
Wh...Where are those hats coming from?
Wh...Where are those hats coming from?
slalvation
+14 -2
From the ARROWS.
From the ARROWS.
rowboat
+2 -0
I'm beginning to realize that for all that I did glean from the Achewood Canon my first time through, there were a few things I missed. Somehow, one of them was Lyle's somewhat thinly veiled fragility. I can't wait to see what I'll find on the third go-round.
I'm beginning to realize that for all that I did glean from the Achewood Canon my first time through, there were a few things I missed. Somehow, one of them was Lyle's somewhat thinly veiled fragility. I can't wait to see what I'll find on the third go-round.
ovenface
+3 -0
Today I saw a picture of a tiger wearing an absurd hat. I laughed until I felt guilty for finding amusement in his pain. Then I saw the picture again and laughed some more.
Today I saw a picture of a tiger wearing an absurd hat. I laughed until I felt guilty for finding amusement in his pain. Then I saw the picture again and laughed some more.
werewolves
+3 -0
Lyle already has a hat.
Lyle already has a hat.
hateandwar
+4 -2
My feelings are that this is the saddest thing.
My feelings are that this is the saddest thing.
semiquaver
+0 -0
For shame, man. For shame.
For shame, man. For shame.
killingthejay
+0 -0
turns out you're right.
turns out you're right.
coco
+0 -0
1) Mr. Bear is so delighted about the hat situation that he has to cover his mouth.
2) Lyle is clutching his sleeves in pain.
1) Mr. Bear is so delighted about the hat situation that he has to cover his mouth.
2) Lyle is clutching his sleeves in pain.
snowman
+0 -0
yeah, what is he, giggling?
yeah, what is he, giggling?
hateandwar
+0 -0
I kinda' guessed shuddering with pain and sadness
I kinda' guessed shuddering with pain and sadness
snowman
+1 -0
I love the idea of this strip, but somehow it just didn't click for me. 3.
I love the idea of this strip, but somehow it just didn't click for me. 3.
nyu
+0 -0
Wait, what?
Wait, what?
darleen
+0 -0
I like this one because my name is "Darleen". Though I'm upset Lyle spelt my name wrong. Though I guess that's understandable, seen as how we've never met in person before.
I like this one because my name is "Darleen". Though I'm upset Lyle spelt my name wrong. Though I guess that's understandable, seen as how we've never met in person before.
especial
+6 -0
I think your name is spelt wrong.
I think your name is spelt wrong.
radarjammer
+0 -0
Teodor is way too fat to be a cowboy.
Teodor is way too fat to be a cowboy.
caseyb3
+0 -0
The way I like to sum up Las Vegas to out-of-towners is an incredibly fat man I once saw in Olive Garden; he was wearing a standard blue shirt and slacks, a bolo tie, and a black Stetson.
Las Vegas is neither the sort of town in which everyone can get away with wearing a black Stetson anywhere nor the sort of town in which no one can ever get away with wearing a black Stetson. We fall right between 'moderately fat in Starbucks' and 'woman at gay rodeo'.
The way I like to sum up Las Vegas to out-of-towners is an incredibly fat man I once saw in Olive Garden; he was wearing a standard blue shirt and slacks, a bolo tie, and a black Stetson.
Las Vegas is neither the sort of town in which everyone can get away with wearing a black Stetson anywhere nor the sort of town in which no one can ever get away with wearing a black Stetson. We fall right between 'moderately fat in Starbucks' and 'woman at gay rodeo'.
hpk
+0 -0
So are Wilford Brimley and Joe Don Baker, but they're some of the most well-known cowboys there are.
So are Wilford Brimley and Joe Don Baker, but they're some of the most well-known cowboys there are.
mattylite
+1 -0
Somethin' about that Darlene hat just looks so Dr. Seuss to me. Anybody else gettin' that? Some Seuss? I mean like a good Seuss feeling. Good Seuss vibes.
Somethin' about that Darlene hat just looks so Dr. Seuss to me. Anybody else gettin' that? Some Seuss? I mean like a good Seuss feeling. Good Seuss vibes.
hateandwar
+0 -0
I dig dude, all manner of Dr Seuss devices just having extraneous suspension, big banners declaring non-words that rhyme with actual-words.
I dig dude, all manner of Dr Seuss devices just having extraneous suspension, big banners declaring non-words that rhyme with actual-words.
mattylite
+2 -0
Extraneous Suspension: The Dr. Seuss Story
Extraneous Suspension: The Dr. Seuss Story
sje46
+5 -0
5'd for continuity.
Plus, I just plain love this one.
5'd for continuity.
Plus, I just plain love this one.
plummet
+0 -0
A comment left by plummet was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Bill4935, habnabit, JohnandDeanster)
A comment left by plummet was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Bill4935, habnabit, JohnandDeanster)
plummet
+1 -1
REPLYING TO AN SJE POST IS PUNISHABLE BY LAMES
REPLYING TO AN SJE POST IS PUNISHABLE BY LAMES
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
REPLYING TO YOUR OWN POST IS PUNISHABLE BY...
*shrug* having to give mouth-to-mouth to Jerry Stiller.
REPLYING TO YOUR OWN POST IS PUNISHABLE BY...
*shrug* having to give mouth-to-mouth to Jerry Stiller.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
the alt text is now extra sad knowing her fate.
the alt text is now extra sad knowing her fate.
xud
+2 -0
This strip confirms who Darlene is . Which goes to show that Onstad has a PHD in continuity.
This strip confirms who Darlene is . Which goes to show that Onstad has a PHD in continuity.
7th_shot
+0 -0
Holy hell I just decided to read back through the archives, and I'm so glad I did. What a thing to remember and elaborate on years down the line.
Holy hell I just decided to read back through the archives, and I'm so glad I did. What a thing to remember and elaborate on years down the line.
heccibiggs
+0 -0
The Darlene hat reminds me of Cassandra from Doctor Who.
[IMGS OFF]
The Darlene hat reminds me of Cassandra from Doctor Who.
[IMGS OFF]
ph3r
+0 -0
Well, if Darlene had his name written on her hand...
hmmmmmmmm
Well, if Darlene had his name written on her hand...
hmmmmmmmm
chloraloner
+0 -0
Man, now why'd you have to go and do a thing?
Man, now why'd you have to go and do a thing?
johnnybaverage
+0 -0
The saddest thing is a stuffed tiger with alcoholism who can only express his grief through ridiculous headgear.
The saddest thing is a stuffed tiger with alcoholism who can only express his grief through ridiculous headgear.
What the..
At first I thought that was a strip of skin with the name Darlene tattooed on it.
You mean it isn't?
It could be Lyle's own tattooed skin.
In response to the heartbreak of Darlene leaving him, he might have flayed the skin from his own breast, cured it and later made it into a hat to help him in periods of advanced melancholia.
Whether the hat helps initiate them or end them is anyone's guess.
Is Darlene the lady with the bad hair who sure as HELL ain't marryin' no dishwasher in the first strip of 2009?
It is shocking that I would see this in the archives and have the same thought only hours after you. SHOCKING.
Clearly, the man has been waiting for an explanation, and is desperate to receive one.
Also a conincidence that Darlene (if that's her name) makes her reappearance within a few days of these posts.
SPOOKY!
Six years and some change later, the story is told.
Ha! I was just about to make the same point about six years of continuity confirmed on the latest strip, and link to her from there. Chubby for your alacrity!
way to ruin the surprise for all the noobs, ya dickweed.
Yep, it's such a an amazing 'reveal' when it happens. Just at the end of The Sixth Sense or Soylent Green . It's the vast and dizzying revelation that all of Achewood was building up to.
Twit.
Actually, by the time I got to the Darlene story, I'd completely forgotten about this strip, despite having a vague recollection of Lyle having once had a girlfriend named Darlene.
In the end,
the surprise was ruined for everyoneno one cared.I like how Lyle's hat has earholes which disappear when the hat comes off.