deimosrising
+12 -0
Honestly if this worked it would seem less humane to me, not more.
Honestly if this worked it would seem less humane to me, not more.
scion
+0 -0
Perhaps he's goading the chicken into a cat-on-bird no-holds-barred hand-to-hand fight to the death? A solution with honor for the winner and the loser.
Perhaps he's goading the chicken into a cat-on-bird no-holds-barred hand-to-hand fight to the death? A solution with honor for the winner and the loser.
jhunter
+1 -0
Chickens don't have hands, though. I think Beef should impose some kind of handicap upon himself to keep things sporting.
Chickens don't have hands, though. I think Beef should impose some kind of handicap upon himself to keep things sporting.
magb
+0 -0
Angry Roast Beef always gets me.
Angry Roast Beef always gets me.
chaos
+36 -1
what the hell roast beef that was rude
what the hell roast beef that was rude
alejandroadam
+10 -0
I love the panel where he musters what he needs for yelling a itty bitty soul to death
I love the panel where he musters what he needs for yelling a itty bitty soul to death
dropkickpikachu
+13 -0
Chicken' all actin' defiant in the last panel.
Chicken' all actin' defiant in the last panel.
the_doz
+8 -0
bruk
bruk
mockereo
+0 -0
i took that bruk as a death gasp as that tinly little heart stopped
i took that bruk as a death gasp as that tinly little heart stopped
lizjones
+15 -0
I dunno, that looks like another rooster to me. Beef's gonna straight-up roast another ding dong.
I dunno, that looks like another rooster to me. Beef's gonna straight-up roast another ding dong.
someone3
+14 -0
coq au vin
is a rooster that is tenderized in red wine, i take forever to make, but apperently you have to emotionally tenderize it first.
coq au vin
is a rooster that is tenderized in red wine, i take forever to make, but apperently you have to emotionally tenderize it first.
sexualhomeboy
+3 -0
"coq au vin" is french or something for "cock in wine", so that would be the point, yes.
"coq au vin" is french or something for "cock in wine", so that would be the point, yes.
gormster
+5 -0
delicious, delicious cock.
delicious, delicious cock.
maldraedior
+5 -0
a chubby for your delicious cock
a chubby for your delicious cock
soticoto
+0 -0
A veritable sausage-fest.
A veritable sausage-fest.
cuddlefish
+0 -0
bahahahaha classic beef
bahahahaha classic beef
katsura
+6 -0
This is easily one of my favorite strips ever.
WHO YOU GOIN' 'BRUK' AT
This is easily one of my favorite strips ever.
WHO YOU GOIN' 'BRUK' AT
nurdbot
+3 -0
Free range chickens are hardcore to kill.
Free range chickens are hardcore to kill.
jamers
+5 -0
They can easily take out an eye with a well aimed peck.
They can easily take out an eye with a well aimed peck.
achewoodno1fan
+0 -1
lol this is like how i get when im angry/pissed off- SThu you SUCK SO MUCH
lol this is like how i get when im angry/pissed off- SThu you SUCK SO MUCH
djwhiterabbit
+1 -0
if beef ain't careful, he's gonna get put in the newspaper for yellin' so loud that he had to go to the hospital.
if beef ain't careful, he's gonna get put in the newspaper for yellin' so loud that he had to go to the hospital.
featurelessvoid
+7 -0
This only works if the chicken is from Circumstances. Otherwise, chickens have mad self-esteem.
This only works if the chicken is from Circumstances. Otherwise, chickens have mad self-esteem.
byronic
+2 -0
After seeing this strip, I tried this at my cousin's farm. It doesn't work. And his wife thinks I'm a total idiot as I tried to explain why I was yelling at her livestock.
After seeing this strip, I tried this at my cousin's farm. It doesn't work. And his wife thinks I'm a total idiot as I tried to explain why I was yelling at her livestock.
killerlimpet
+3 -0
I just tried it with some roaches that are invading my kitchen. Didn't work with them either, and my girlfriend thinks I'm "a special boy."
I just tried it with some roaches that are invading my kitchen. Didn't work with them either, and my girlfriend thinks I'm "a special boy."
thisdoggisproice
+7 -0
Animals killed with mean words have the faint taste of tears, though luckily, this is a taste to which Roast Beef is well accustomed.
Animals killed with mean words have the faint taste of tears, though luckily, this is a taste to which Roast Beef is well accustomed.
charchar
+1 -0
you can't even fly.
you can't even fly.
cousinted
+3 -1
You should pour boiling hot gravy in its eyes!
You should pour boiling hot gravy in its eyes!
agentstinky
+2 -0
OK hot soup is on my eyes.
Oh no now you're doing a hip hop dance on my head.
OK hot soup is on my eyes.
Oh no now you're doing a hip hop dance on my head.
jesler729
+1 -0
Beef kind of loses it here.
Beef kind of loses it here.
honesttom
+9 -0
"YOU WERE BORN TO DIE AND OVULATE!"
"YOU WERE BORN TO DIE AND OVULATE!"
mugi
+1 -0
In that order?
In that order?
missbee
+1 -0
dude, cocks don't ovulate!
dude, cocks don't ovulate!
i_love_kate
+3 -0
Shit! Someone get me to a doctor?
Shit! Someone get me to a doctor?
norrin
+6 -0
I think if you want to kill a chicken by yelling at it, you shouldn't try to be mean, you should try shocking it.
"The mailman is sleeping with your wife!"
I think if you want to kill a chicken by yelling at it, you shouldn't try to be mean, you should try shocking it.
"The mailman is sleeping with your wife!"
dallovich
+0 -0
Sad thing is that this was prolly what was yelled at Roast Beef when he was young :<
Sad thing is that this was prolly what was yelled at Roast Beef when he was young :<
hendetta
+0 -0
Oh my dogg
Oh my dogg
budenhagen
+0 -0
That "bruk" gets me EVERY time. Goddamn chicken.
That "bruk" gets me EVERY time. Goddamn chicken.
professorhazard
+2 -0
I'LL BE AT DUANE'S!
I'LL BE AT DUANE'S!
tinhand
+1 -1
Beef shouldn't have yelled at him. That was uncalled for.
Beef shouldn't have yelled at him. That was uncalled for.
iguessso
+9 -0
it seems to me that roast beef is kind of yelling at himself at the end of the strip, and i know the chicken knows this.
it seems to me that roast beef is kind of yelling at himself at the end of the strip, and i know the chicken knows this.
hellofditties
+0 -0
Food chain, Roast Beef. Get used to it.
Food chain, Roast Beef. Get used to it.
missbee
+8 -0
you should never be a cock to a cock
you should never be a cock to a cock
fallow_fields
+0 -0
five! no, ten!
five! no, ten!
pan-optic
+1 -0
the transition in the bottom row from confused arched eyebrows to guilty handwringing to pure insane anger, along with the shocked expression on the rooster's face, makes this comic
straight
up
excellent
the transition in the bottom row from confused arched eyebrows to guilty handwringing to pure insane anger, along with the shocked expression on the rooster's face, makes this comic
straight
up
excellent
chloraloner
+0 -0
Shock didn't stop the rooster from sassing back at the end.
Shock didn't stop the rooster from sassing back at the end.
tangles
+3 -0
to answer the alt text with a horrid nerd joke that deserves to be lamed out of existence, power word: kill
to answer the alt text with a horrid nerd joke that deserves to be lamed out of existence, power word: kill
theyang
+0 -0
WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU CHICKENS
WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU CHICKENS
blarghamagarky
+0 -0
Fran Drescher did this same thing in a scene from the Beautician and the beast
Fran Drescher did this same thing in a scene from the Beautician and the beast
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Why did you you think of that though
Why would you think of that
And wait...a blarghamagarky post marked as new?
This day is already confusing me. Too early, too early.
Why did you you think of that though
Why would you think of that
And wait...a blarghamagarky post marked as new?
This day is already confusing me. Too early, too early.
tonyhighwind
+0 -0
This is the only way a depressed cat can even think of killing a chicken, a chicken that was probably bred with a short lifespan and marginal escape abilities as desired traits.
GOLD.
This is the only way a depressed cat can even think of killing a chicken, a chicken that was probably bred with a short lifespan and marginal escape abilities as desired traits.
GOLD.
beverage
+0 -0
If I had to choose one strip, this would be high in the running.
If I had to choose one strip, this would be high in the running.
vulpes-aurum
+0 -0
Reminds me of the video with the guy yelling at his cats.
Reminds me of the video with the guy yelling at his cats.
lolsworth
+0 -0
Chicken doesn't know what the fuck
Chicken doesn't know what the fuck
rarelement
+0 -0
This was my first strip!
This was my first strip!
They should have done this in Withnail & I.
How can we make it die?
I'm almost 100% positive this is how Gordon Ramsey prepares Coq au vin.
Good call! When I first saw that movie, I sort of expected them to wimp out and make friends with it or something. I'm glad they found a way to destroy its itty bitty soul instead.
Actually, I was watching that movie agai recently and when the chicken scene came up I was expecting them to shout at it. Then I remembered, no, that's Roastbeef.
Same here.
Withnail had far more class than to tell a chicken "it sucked" before despatching it.
Incidentally i can imagine liebot yelling "scrubbers" out fo a car window.
This topic is exactly why I dig Achewood message boards, exemplified.
I can see Lyle ranting "I demand to have some booze!" and vomiting lighter fluid.
Wait a sec... is that who I think it is in your pic?
Could by just my imagination.
They should have done this on Good Eats.
I don't think Alton Brown is raw enough to pull that off.
"YOU...ARE...A...UNITASKER!"
Yeah, doesn't work.
oh my god oh my god oh my god
spot on, my friend
Just saying, the Cuckoo for Coq au Vin had this exact same premise. Gasp! This chicken is ALIVE! Now what!
It's been done.
alton brown is raw enough to pull anything off. he made cake icing with avocados, fer christs' sake.
Alton Brown's freezer operates at minus-twenty-seven degrees. Kelvin.
Hilarious!
Every Burger King Alton Brown has walked into has immediately closed forever -- try as they might, they simply can't 'do it his way'.
no way man, Alton is hell of raw
This strip makes me temporarily regret switching from a Withnail & I avatar to Vlad.
yeah i agree