thommy_h
+5 -0
"...THE SMIIITHS..."
Good stuff.
"...THE SMIIITHS..."
Good stuff.
billylk
+9 -0
Rod Higgins is the good cop almost by default.You know full well that Pat's the hard ass.
Pun intended.
Rod Higgins is the good cop almost by default.You know full well that Pat's the hard ass.
Pun intended.
billylk
+2 -1
Ugh, Huggins.
It is so bedtime. Don't hurt me.
Ugh, Huggins.
It is so bedtime. Don't hurt me.
fielding
+1 -0
...is that you, Pat?
I guess that contrary to your assessment, Huggins is not always the good cop.
...is that you, Pat?
I guess that contrary to your assessment, Huggins is not always the good cop.
billylk
+8 -0
Speaking of Rod...Anybody make the connection here?
[IMGS OFF]
Speaking of Rod...Anybody make the connection here?
[IMGS OFF]
norsef
+0 -1
That is really crap photo shopping right there.
That is really crap photo shopping right there.
wae
+3 -0
However, I would have suspected that Pat was enough of a bull-crazy douche-bag to grow a Cop Mustache on his own.
However, I would have suspected that Pat was enough of a bull-crazy douche-bag to grow a Cop Mustache on his own.
fuckyoufriday
+2 -0
I think he's in his magical realism outfit. [Drumstick and engorged cat cock not pictured]
I think he's in his magical realism outfit. [Drumstick and engorged cat cock not pictured]
blastradius
+0 -0
A Nervousness Blanket. So Roast Beef. Nice to at least see an engagement update at any rate. BTW, did Roast Beef receive this blanket in a previous strip? If so, what date?
A Nervousness Blanket. So Roast Beef. Nice to at least see an engagement update at any rate. BTW, did Roast Beef receive this blanket in a previous strip? If so, what date?
tellumo
+4 -0
I don't think we've seen the Nervousness Blanket before, but [url="https://achewood.com/index.php?date=10222004"]on 10/22/04[/url], we learned that "errrrAP-AP-AP" or similar is the sound of Beef's nervous-puke. Ray would know it anywhere.
I don't think we've seen the Nervousness Blanket before, but [url="https://achewood.com/index.php?date=10222004"]on 10/22/04[/url], we learned that "errrrAP-AP-AP" or similar is the sound of Beef's nervous-puke. Ray would know it anywhere.
blastradius
+1 -0
that's too awesome, that onstad has his characters so downpat, that he can remember a sound effect he did two years ago, and "bring it up" again in passing.
that's too awesome, that onstad has his characters so downpat, that he can remember a sound effect he did two years ago, and "bring it up" again in passing.
duskbringer
+2 -0
The Nervousness Blanket is another item I want to see in the store.
The Nervousness Blanket is another item I want to see in the store.
lacrimus
+13 -0
Make your own nervousness blanket kit:
You'll need:
1 blanket
Neuroses
Vomit
How to:
Take blanket. Hide under it, perhaps outside. Be nervous and vomit!
Make your own nervousness blanket kit:
You'll need:
1 blanket
Neuroses
Vomit
How to:
Take blanket. Hide under it, perhaps outside. Be nervous and vomit!
fielding
+5 -0
having difficulty acquiring vomit perhaps a shortage please advise
having difficulty acquiring vomit perhaps a shortage please advise
lacrimus
+32 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
plummet
+4 -0
>HURGH< >HRFGH< >SPOGHTGTH<
>HURGH< >HRFGH< >SPOGHTGTH<
stormagnet
+0 -1
What kind? We have three varieties...
(c'mon guys, you left that one hanging for six months? )
What kind? We have three varieties...
(c'mon guys, you left that one hanging for six months? )
theryuujin
+0 -0
you ruined it with the parenthetical.
you ruined it with the parenthetical.
blastradius
+1 -0
I too feel sad for Téodor, not so much for playing a song into a computer website, but for playing a Smiths song into a computer website.
BTW, when did Téodor start getting desperate about finding a woman? A reaction to Roast Beef's engagement to Molly? Perhaps this is the start of a new story arc.
I too feel sad for Téodor, not so much for playing a song into a computer website, but for playing a Smiths song into a computer website.
BTW, when did Téodor start getting desperate about finding a woman? A reaction to Roast Beef's engagement to Molly? Perhaps this is the start of a new story arc.
lil_chochacho
+0 -1
It's not clear that the song is a Smiths song. It seems more likely that Teodor is singing a song about The Smiths. So, it might be a Teodor original song which is a tribute to The Smiths.
It's not clear that the song is a Smiths song. It seems more likely that Teodor is singing a song about The Smiths. So, it might be a Teodor original song which is a tribute to The Smiths.
thommy_h
+4 -0
If it's a song that contains the line "...THE SMIIITHS..." then the joke isn't funny at all. I think the whole idea is that "...THE SMIIITHS..." is self-evidently not what is actually heard.
It's a subversion of the way speech bubbles work and the concept as a whole. Good job, Onstad.
If it's a song that contains the line "...THE SMIIITHS..." then the joke isn't funny at all. I think the whole idea is that "...THE SMIIITHS..." is self-evidently not what is actually heard.
It's a subversion of the way speech bubbles work and the concept as a whole. Good job, Onstad.
aaron_haynes
+0 -0
Think of it as using bracket notation to paraphrase the lyrics and ice burn Teodor at the same time. It's like having him sing "[It is very sad that I am doing this thing]."
This is a really difficult joke to try and explain.
Think of it as using bracket notation to paraphrase the lyrics and ice burn Teodor at the same time. It's like having him sing "[It is very sad that I am doing this thing]."
This is a really difficult joke to try and explain.
farqussus
+1 -0
I get what you mean. If it was instrumental, mayhaps it would be [poorly strummed minor chooooorrrds]
I get what you mean. If it was instrumental, mayhaps it would be [poorly strummed minor chooooorrrds]
lil_chochacho
+1 -0
It seems like a stretch that what is heard is self-evidently not "...THE SMIIITHS...". It seems reasonable to question whether he's singing a song about The Smiths as opposed to a Smiths song. Moreover, it seems equally weird and pathetic of Theodor to sing an original song dedicated to the Smiths as opposed to merely singing a Smiths song, so it's unclear what wouldn't be funny even if he was singing a song that is a tribute to the Smiths.
Your interepretation seems clear enough, and probably the right one to have, I just dont' think it is self-evident.
It seems like a stretch that what is heard is self-evidently not "...THE SMIIITHS...". It seems reasonable to question whether he's singing a song about The Smiths as opposed to a Smiths song. Moreover, it seems equally weird and pathetic of Theodor to sing an original song dedicated to the Smiths as opposed to merely singing a Smiths song, so it's unclear what wouldn't be funny even if he was singing a song that is a tribute to the Smiths.
Your interepretation seems clear enough, and probably the right one to have, I just dont' think it is self-evident.
werthog42
+0 -0
Thanks for that explanation. As someone who's not into music enough to know that there was a band/group/whatever called The Smiths, this boggled my mind.
Thanks for that explanation. As someone who's not into music enough to know that there was a band/group/whatever called The Smiths, this boggled my mind.
godfatherofsouls
+1 -1
yeah, that's the joke's effect, but i figured-- it's philippe's paper, if he heard the other guys talking about how sad it was, somebody [my vote lyle] probably pointed out the patheticism in that he was playing the smiths. Philippe remembers this detail and thats how he incorporates it. Little guy goes with what he knows.
yeah, that's the joke's effect, but i figured-- it's philippe's paper, if he heard the other guys talking about how sad it was, somebody [my vote lyle] probably pointed out the patheticism in that he was playing the smiths. Philippe remembers this detail and thats how he incorporates it. Little guy goes with what he knows.
thatcrazycommie
+0 -0
Maybe the guys were talking about how sad it was that Teodor was playing a Smiths song, and Philippe assumed that "The Smiths" was actually the name of the song, and that those were the words.
Maybe the guys were talking about how sad it was that Teodor was playing a Smiths song, and Philippe assumed that "The Smiths" was actually the name of the song, and that those were the words.
fuckyoufriday
+7 -0
Does anyone else hear this delivered in a sort of mopey, "Wesley Willis on downers" style? "The band was AH-SEM. The band rocked like a magic kiss. They really whupped a llama's ass. Morrisey is my friend. I gave him a head-butt. THE SMIIIIIIIIIIIIIITHS, THE SMIIIIIIIIIIIIITHS, THE SMIIIIIIIIIIITHS, THE SMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITHS!"
Does anyone else hear this delivered in a sort of mopey, "Wesley Willis on downers" style? "The band was AH-SEM. The band rocked like a magic kiss. They really whupped a llama's ass. Morrisey is my friend. I gave him a head-butt. THE SMIIIIIIIIIIIIIITHS, THE SMIIIIIIIIIIIIITHS, THE SMIIIIIIIIIIITHS, THE SMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITHS!"
lolsworth
+0 -0
Rock over London, Rock on Los Angeles, Budweiser: Proud to be Your Bud.
Rock over London, Rock on Los Angeles, Budweiser: Proud to be Your Bud.
skiddyfisk
+0 -0
A comment left by skiddyfisk was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by silver_lake, songbirdspectre, relaxing, equinn2006, jmmfgd)
A comment left by skiddyfisk was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by silver_lake, songbirdspectre, relaxing, equinn2006, jmmfgd)
le_chien_manquee
+9 -0
pat would probably love to be the bottom, it just doesn't fit with his self-perception. remember the guy's a total fuckhead.
pat would probably love to be the bottom, it just doesn't fit with his self-perception. remember the guy's a total fuckhead.
personamb
+2 -0
Ah, but as we learned earlier, Huggins is a bottom (see the strip where Teodor first meets him).
Maybe T's loneliness spike was actually caused by Pat getting with Rod!
Ah, but as we learned earlier, Huggins is a bottom (see the strip where Teodor first meets him).
Maybe T's loneliness spike was actually caused by Pat getting with Rod!
sredni
+1 -0
The internet is a fabulous place where people discuss gay cat sex in every tiny detail.
The internet is a fabulous place where people discuss gay cat sex in every tiny detail.
jackparsons
+0 -0
Everyone except 'retardo' who is not allowed to.
People often switch bottom v.s. top from real life. It is a repressed part that comes out.
Everyone except 'retardo' who is not allowed to.
People often switch bottom v.s. top from real life. It is a repressed part that comes out.
semiquaver
+0 -0
It is also something that can be fairly fluid depending on the relationship and the persons involved
It is also something that can be fairly fluid depending on the relationship and the persons involved
gmm
+0 -0
And normally I would say "If you don't like Friday Facts, I don't like you" but this one IS espescially grand
And normally I would say "If you don't like Friday Facts, I don't like you" but this one IS espescially grand
byronic
+1 -0
GOD would want us to have This video.
GOD would want us to have This video.
gumfish
+3 -0
Nearly every fact here is either sad or terrifying. Luckily Phillipe is five.
Nearly every fact here is either sad or terrifying. Luckily Phillipe is five.
honesttom
+3 -1
"Parents' video" may be my euphemism of the day. In other news, am I the only one envisioning a spinoff strip about Pat and Huggins busting crime on the mean streets of Achewood?
Actually, no, that would be terrible. Neither of them is pro-active enough to arrest anyone.
"Parents' video" may be my euphemism of the day. In other news, am I the only one envisioning a spinoff strip about Pat and Huggins busting crime on the mean streets of Achewood?
Actually, no, that would be terrible. Neither of them is pro-active enough to arrest anyone.
what42
+36 -0
I think Pat is pro-active enough to arrest everyone .
I think Pat is pro-active enough to arrest everyone .
andrew_
+4 -0
starting with the Barbers.
starting with the Barbers.
mangaknightz
+0 -0
A comment left by mangaknightz was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by equinn2006, thesyndicate88, lastlarf)
A comment left by mangaknightz was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by equinn2006, thesyndicate88, lastlarf)
lastlarf
+0 -0
Pat completely hates barbers, he has politics bumper stickers suggesting that we arrest them all.
Pat completely hates barbers, he has politics bumper stickers suggesting that we arrest them all.
ford
+1 -0
those who gave this lames apparently do not read the blogs. Pat once actually attempted a citizen's arrest on a mailman, for bringing him an "illegal" bill or something.
Mangaknightz i have given you a make-up chubby. I would recommend that others do this too, except your name is mangaknightz.
those who gave this lames apparently do not read the blogs. Pat once actually attempted a citizen's arrest on a mailman, for bringing him an "illegal" bill or something.
Mangaknightz i have given you a make-up chubby. I would recommend that others do this too, except your name is mangaknightz.
mastronaut
+2 -0
a partner cops show, like dragnet, except they will leave the station and Rod will say he left the box of donuts on his desk and then they fuck.
a partner cops show, like dragnet, except they will leave the station and Rod will say he left the box of donuts on his desk and then they fuck.
blastradius
+0 -0
Pat is a pair of knee-high black patent leather boots from the goose-step squad.
Pat is a pair of knee-high black patent leather boots from the goose-step squad.
fuckyoufriday
+1 -0
Uh, vegan leather, please!
Uh, vegan leather, please!
dusty
+0 -0
Pat is basically every parking cop I ever met. "Hey, I could have hit into you! You can't just break like that...ok, slowing down right there might not technically have been illegal but I could have one of my buddies on the force bust you...no I'm not technically allowed to pull people over, but I didn't force you to...we don't have badge numbers, we have tag numbers, and no you can't, I have to go now."
Pat is basically every parking cop I ever met. "Hey, I could have hit into you! You can't just break like that...ok, slowing down right there might not technically have been illegal but I could have one of my buddies on the force bust you...no I'm not technically allowed to pull people over, but I didn't force you to...we don't have badge numbers, we have tag numbers, and no you can't, I have to go now."
plummet
+0 -0
this is a highly disturbing strip
in a good way
this is a highly disturbing strip
in a good way
andrew_
+2 -0
Phillipe is wearing a sleuth-y sort of cap.
Phillipe is wearing a sleuth-y sort of cap.
relaxing
+2 -0
Capo 4th fret, playing "There Is A Light That Never Goes Out" for maximum effect ( Take me out tonight / where there's music and there's people ) on AFF chat. Teodor, you should know better.
Capo 4th fret, playing "There Is A Light That Never Goes Out" for maximum effect ( Take me out tonight / where there's music and there's people ) on AFF chat. Teodor, you should know better.
hip-hobbit
+0 -0
A comment left by hip-hobbit was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, blastradius, BillyLK, STUART)
A comment left by hip-hobbit was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, blastradius, BillyLK, STUART)
hawaiian_robot
+1 -0
Props on knowing the original key that the song is in
Props on knowing the original key that the song is in
theboneorchard
+0 -0
I have a friend who calls all Under Armor sports wear products, "Man-gerie".
I have a friend who calls all Under Armor sports wear products, "Man-gerie".
hubajube
+11 -1
I'm ready for the whole sticking-MAN-in-front-of-anythung-womanly schtick to go away now. Good job, Friends.
I'm ready for the whole sticking-MAN-in-front-of-anythung-womanly schtick to go away now. Good job, Friends.
dhinson
+3 -1
Mangina.
Mangina.
nbgreene
+0 -0
A comment left by nbgreene was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by equinn2006, pitseleh, lateadopter)
A comment left by nbgreene was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by equinn2006, pitseleh, lateadopter)
mr_lostman28
+1 -0
manssiere ?
manssiere ?
straw
+8 -0
IT'S "THE BRO"
IT'S "THE BRO"
trollcollins
+6 -1
Manpon?
I go too far.
Manpon?
I go too far.
hikikomori
+6 -0
ALL ABOARD THE MAN-TRAIN!
ALL ABOARD THE MAN-TRAIN!
imitationcrab
+3 -0
Hello! Welcome to the International House of Man-Cakes
Hello! Welcome to the International House of Man-Cakes
godfatherofsouls
+4 -0
my manwich
my manwich
tellumo
+0 -0
A comment left by tellumo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ElZilcho, hellofditties, toughasnails001)
A comment left by tellumo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ElZilcho, hellofditties, toughasnails001)
neonfreon
+0 -0
A comment left by neonfreon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by equinn2006, Aaron_Haynes, gbeaton, SeanBad, Mastronaut)
A comment left by neonfreon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by equinn2006, Aaron_Haynes, gbeaton, SeanBad, Mastronaut)
zefiel
+6 -0
Man, the dude managed to work a reference to Penny-Arcade from Achewood, that is amazing in an out of itself. It's like discovering an ancient evolutionary link between mashed potatoes and the bald eagle.
Man, the dude managed to work a reference to Penny-Arcade from Achewood, that is amazing in an out of itself. It's like discovering an ancient evolutionary link between mashed potatoes and the bald eagle.
umbra
+1 -1
I'm not sure a reference to some random asset bar comment is as valuable as a reference to actual Achewood content.
Wait. I am sure. It's not.
I'm not sure a reference to some random asset bar comment is as valuable as a reference to actual Achewood content.
Wait. I am sure. It's not.
aaron_haynes
+6 -1
Call it blasphemy if you want, but they're closer than Achewood is in relation to most other comics. Same willingness to approach the English language at kind of a sideways angle, same "after the moment" style of punchline. I have no Beef with Penny-Arcade.
Call it blasphemy if you want, but they're closer than Achewood is in relation to most other comics. Same willingness to approach the English language at kind of a sideways angle, same "after the moment" style of punchline. I have no Beef with Penny-Arcade.
aaron_haynes
+0 -0
You may lame me for that pun, if you wish.
You may lame me for that pun, if you wish.
gormster
+3 -0
It was a lame pun.
But I'm sick of people not liking Penny Arcade because it's popular. To all those who don't read it for that reason: get over yourselves.
It was a lame pun.
But I'm sick of people not liking Penny Arcade because it's popular. To all those who don't read it for that reason: get over yourselves.
neonfreon
+0 -0
A comment left by neonfreon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by KilroyWasHere, gormster, equinn2006, Aaron_Haynes, Mastronaut)
A comment left by neonfreon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by KilroyWasHere, gormster, equinn2006, Aaron_Haynes, Mastronaut)
werthog42
+0 -0
Onstad himself respects Penny Arcade, according to the Onion interview.
Onstad himself respects Penny Arcade, according to the Onion interview.
gormster
+1 -1
I guess you're entitled to your own opinion, but your particular opinions tend to be rubbish.
I guess you're entitled to your own opinion, but your particular opinions tend to be rubbish.
boredom_man
+0 -0
I'm not part of the subculture it's aimed at, don't understand what they're talking about, and therefore dislike Penny Arcade for the same reason I dislike Family Circus.
I'm not part of the subculture it's aimed at, don't understand what they're talking about, and therefore dislike Penny Arcade for the same reason I dislike Family Circus.
aaron_haynes
+2 -0
Family Circus sucks because it's willfully naive and saccharine to the point of inducing stomachaches, and would probably suck no matter what its subject matter is.
I don't think that's the best example anyway, since it's practically impossible to NOT get what Family Circus is talking about. It's rose-tinted 50s American nuclear family sugary garbage, and the misunderstandings of children without any wit or irony. Cathy or even Frazz with its health-nut proselytizing would've been a better example.
Family Circus sucks because it's willfully naive and saccharine to the point of inducing stomachaches, and would probably suck no matter what its subject matter is.
I don't think that's the best example anyway, since it's practically impossible to NOT get what Family Circus is talking about. It's rose-tinted 50s American nuclear family sugary garbage, and the misunderstandings of children without any wit or irony. Cathy or even Frazz with its health-nut proselytizing would've been a better example.
boredom_man
+0 -0
I haven't read Frazz. Cathy isn't analogous, because I do understand it, at least reasonably well -- all of her complaints are, in fact, complaints middle-aged American women might issue if they were enormously self-absorbed nitwits like Cathy. The character of Cathy is alien, not the subject matter, so I feel comfortable stating that the strip has no merit. Penny Arcade might be good, for all I know. I'm inclined to stand by my original Family Circus comparison, but I haven't read Family Circus in 25, 26 years and am peering at some pretty hazy memories. Here's seven dollars.
I haven't read Frazz. Cathy isn't analogous, because I do understand it, at least reasonably well -- all of her complaints are, in fact, complaints middle-aged American women might issue if they were enormously self-absorbed nitwits like Cathy. The character of Cathy is alien, not the subject matter, so I feel comfortable stating that the strip has no merit. Penny Arcade might be good, for all I know. I'm inclined to stand by my original Family Circus comparison, but I haven't read Family Circus in 25, 26 years and am peering at some pretty hazy memories. Here's seven dollars.
norrin
+0 -0
I like how both play around with the English language, in their own ways. They're both good comics for fans of words.
I like how both play around with the English language, in their own ways. They're both good comics for fans of words.
mangtastic
+0 -0
The Glass Man-agerie
The Glass Man-agerie
brokeaccount
+26 -0
It's nice to see that Pat's still got his six pack. You don't get THOSE programmin' a computer! No, you get 'em from furiously humping Rod Huggins.
It's nice to see that Pat's still got his six pack. You don't get THOSE programmin' a computer! No, you get 'em from furiously humping Rod Huggins.
stuart
+6 -0
Oh man that is mega nasty
That is dog shit
Oh man that is mega nasty
That is dog shit
microwave
+5 -1
He goes not smile or frown.
He goes not smile or frown.
fielding
+1 -0
Is this a question?
Hm.
If he doesn't go, then I must frown. Please make him go.
Is this a question?
Hm.
If he doesn't go, then I must frown. Please make him go.
fineoakstructure
+15 -0
I love the contrasting looks on Pat and Rod. Pat looks intense, like he's trying to butt fuck away his homosexuality; while Rod has a look of mild surpise, as if he just saw an out of print DVD he's been hunting for on Pat's shelf.
I love the contrasting looks on Pat and Rod. Pat looks intense, like he's trying to butt fuck away his homosexuality; while Rod has a look of mild surpise, as if he just saw an out of print DVD he's been hunting for on Pat's shelf.
hungryjoe
+0 -0
A comment left by hungryjoe was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, blastradius, SchnappM, kylemcjuicy, equinn2006, Mastronaut, aperson)
A comment left by hungryjoe was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, blastradius, SchnappM, kylemcjuicy, equinn2006, Mastronaut, aperson)
euphemisms
+3 -0
i almost lamed this, just to prove a point. then i felt bad about this anonymous hypothetical sass.
i almost lamed this, just to prove a point. then i felt bad about this anonymous hypothetical sass.
jujubeesforjesus
+7 -1
Largely. But if you are careful not to insult too directly and have a reasonable argument, chubbies frequently outweigh the lames. Proof that there are at least some intelligent and open minded folk in this sea of fanboy Onstad-ball-hanging. However, for the most part this is a forum about a webcomic, so don't set your hopes too high.
Largely. But if you are careful not to insult too directly and have a reasonable argument, chubbies frequently outweigh the lames. Proof that there are at least some intelligent and open minded folk in this sea of fanboy Onstad-ball-hanging. However, for the most part this is a forum about a webcomic, so don't set your hopes too high.
grayfox
+3 -0
I wouldn't so much call this place a forum as a comment gallery.
I wouldn't so much call this place a forum as a comment gallery.
neonfreon
+5 -2
i wouldn't so much call this thing a place as a deal
i wouldn't so much call this thing a place as a deal
blastradius
+3 -0
this is all just a thing.
this is all just a thing.
madnes
+3 -1
it is definitely a thing.
it is definitely a thing.
unfun
+7 -1
Catty little complaints are not fun to read. Most people enjoy cracking jokes and pointing out funny things about a strip. Serious "criticism" of a webcomic is far more fanboyish than that. Think of two Star Trek nerds arguing over insignificant details that no one cares about.
Catty little complaints are not fun to read. Most people enjoy cracking jokes and pointing out funny things about a strip. Serious "criticism" of a webcomic is far more fanboyish than that. Think of two Star Trek nerds arguing over insignificant details that no one cares about.
neonfreon
+0 -0
A comment left by neonfreon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Mangtastic, equinn2006, Mastronaut, dr_sexlove, Darthemed)
A comment left by neonfreon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Mangtastic, equinn2006, Mastronaut, dr_sexlove, Darthemed)
euphemisms
+6 -0
i used to think that fake mustaches were the greatest thing in the world. i have now been corrected: fake mustaches on homosexual cartoon cats is the greatest Thing in the world.
i used to think that fake mustaches were the greatest thing in the world. i have now been corrected: fake mustaches on homosexual cartoon cats is the greatest Thing in the world.
nabeel84
+0 -1
Great strip today. It is very sad, according to on everyone, and He does not smile or frown are both gold. On that note, could someone describe Marinara throw up?
Great strip today. It is very sad, according to on everyone, and He does not smile or frown are both gold. On that note, could someone describe Marinara throw up?
le_chien_manquee
+0 -0
i took marinara to mean a puke that consists of the crap you eat only when you're steaming drunk, like donner kebabs, pot noodles or 5-day old leftover chinese food you find at the back of the fridge.
i took marinara to mean a puke that consists of the crap you eat only when you're steaming drunk, like donner kebabs, pot noodles or 5-day old leftover chinese food you find at the back of the fridge.
gormster
+0 -0
Or Meatball Subs. That shit is marinara .
Or Meatball Subs. That shit is marinara .
slashtoe
+2 -0
Marinara, or for that matter anything with tomatoes, is Krypton to a person (or cartoon) who suffers from Gastro-Intestinal Reflux Disorder (GIRD), an affliction of the pyloric valve (see Confederacy of Dunces, "My valve!") that plagues Cornelius as he mentioned in a blog post years ago. Persons who overindulge the way Lyle seems to would also be likely candidates.
Meanwhile, "Marinara" is lately used as a flavor description for chips, and I imagine as a sauce option for say buffalo wings or something like that, thus, Regular, Intentional, or Marinara, as in how would you like that sir?
Marinara, or for that matter anything with tomatoes, is Krypton to a person (or cartoon) who suffers from Gastro-Intestinal Reflux Disorder (GIRD), an affliction of the pyloric valve (see Confederacy of Dunces, "My valve!") that plagues Cornelius as he mentioned in a blog post years ago. Persons who overindulge the way Lyle seems to would also be likely candidates.
Meanwhile, "Marinara" is lately used as a flavor description for chips, and I imagine as a sauce option for say buffalo wings or something like that, thus, Regular, Intentional, or Marinara, as in how would you like that sir?
stormagnet
+1 -0
I interpreted this as puking blood.... there may be something wrong with me.
I interpreted this as puking blood.... there may be something wrong with me.
theryuujin
+0 -0
that's where I went with it too.
that's where I went with it too.
homepie
+1 -0
It is a bad idea to call Nice Pete crazy. I fear we will soon find young Phillipe's head in a mailbox.
It is a bad idea to call Nice Pete crazy. I fear we will soon find young Phillipe's head in a mailbox.
patware
+5 -0
This is the box...
...
...
This is the box...
...
...
henrythecad
+0 -0
I got the ap-ap-ap's from some spirit gum i while back. i can relate.
I got the ap-ap-ap's from some spirit gum i while back. i can relate.
unaware
+0 -0
This is a good strip to show for promoting anti-sinning.
This is a good strip to show for promoting anti-sinning.
theoneyouwant
+0 -0
i'm still waiting on the next installment of ray's place
i'm still waiting on the next installment of ray's place
molesticide
+0 -0
yeah, he does not smile or frown. awesome.
my main question though, is, is lyle's video of someone throwing up JUST someone throwing up? i didn't know you could have perversions about that.
yeah, he does not smile or frown. awesome.
my main question though, is, is lyle's video of someone throwing up JUST someone throwing up? i didn't know you could have perversions about that.
hikikomori
+6 -0
There are perversions about that. You know what they say. "If something exists, chances are there are a group of men willing to pay good money to stick their dicks in it."
Maybe they are seeing it as a challenge.
There are perversions about that. You know what they say. "If something exists, chances are there are a group of men willing to pay good money to stick their dicks in it."
Maybe they are seeing it as a challenge.
hikikomori
+0 -0
Bold bold bold BOLD . You'd think I'd have learned that by now.
Bold bold bold BOLD . You'd think I'd have learned that by now.
lastlarf
+5 -0
If it exists, there is porn of it.
If it exists, there is porn of it.
tombsgrave
+2 -0
Rule 34: scourge of the internet. I love it so.
Rule 34: scourge of the internet. I love it so.
ben
+2 -0
There is no porn of me, therefore... oh shit!
There is no porn of me, therefore... oh shit!
norrin
+2 -0
There is. You were sleeping on a dentist's chair.
There is. You were sleeping on a dentist's chair.
julia
+0 -0
perhaps it is a video of Lyle throwing up at a football (because you don't make it go three feet by not caring).
perhaps it is a video of Lyle throwing up at a football (because you don't make it go three feet by not caring).
lateadopter
+0 -0
This, like the cake-sitting fetish, is one that you can Google. I highly recommend that you never do so, and warn your friends not to do it, either.
This, like the cake-sitting fetish, is one that you can Google. I highly recommend that you never do so, and warn your friends not to do it, either.
connellingus
+0 -0
Lyle is exactly the kind of guy who would get off to Max Hardcore.
Lyle is exactly the kind of guy who would get off to Max Hardcore.
featurelessvoid
+0 -0
The Sir Chauncey Mason School for Young Jerks has potential.
The Sir Chauncey Mason School for Young Jerks has potential.
paperboy_2000
+0 -0
As does the school for curious doctors
As does the school for curious doctors
fielding
+0 -0
What about the school for doctors with a Prince Albert?
What about the school for doctors with a Prince Albert?
hellweek
+2 -0
My favorite part was not any of the actual friday facts, but the header of 'I have some binoculars I am big enough to go outside'
My favorite part was not any of the actual friday facts, but the header of 'I have some binoculars I am big enough to go outside'
neonfreon
+1 -0
how is that not a fun fact?
how is that not a fun fact?
wolfsleepy
+2 -1
Put that on a t-shirt, Onstad, and I'd wear it.
I'd wear it outside.
Put that on a t-shirt, Onstad, and I'd wear it.
I'd wear it outside.
boredom_man
+0 -0
That is clearly a motto not for a man's chest but a man's fly.
That is clearly a motto not for a man's chest but a man's fly.
halfbeardmishap
+0 -0
Onstad truly is a master of the great art of written vomit noises.
The ellipses before the AP-AP-AP! Brilliant. I think we all hear that exclamation point happening.
The art once was lost, but no more.
Onstad truly is a master of the great art of written vomit noises.
The ellipses before the AP-AP-AP! Brilliant. I think we all hear that exclamation point happening.
The art once was lost, but no more.
stevepants
+0 -0
Beef puking under the nerviousness blanket = PURE GOLD
Beef puking under the nerviousness blanket = PURE GOLD
red_dawn
+0 -0
Beef is too bust vomiting to write a paste-up manager note.
Beef is too bust vomiting to write a paste-up manager note.
cousinted
+0 -0
Philippe is developing some rather creepy voyeuristic tendencies. He is also sharing these tendencies with us. I'm not sure which bothers me more.
Philippe is developing some rather creepy voyeuristic tendencies. He is also sharing these tendencies with us. I'm not sure which bothers me more.
lateadopter
+1 -0
For once, Philippe is doing something that is actually bad, for which he would in fact deserve the scolding he often gets from Cornelius. And where is Cornelius now? The combination of undeserved scoldings and occasional scot-free, borderline criminality will do far more to warp the little nipper than all the psychological trauma that Lie Bot or Lyle can intentionally inflict.
For once, Philippe is doing something that is actually bad, for which he would in fact deserve the scolding he often gets from Cornelius. And where is Cornelius now? The combination of undeserved scoldings and occasional scot-free, borderline criminality will do far more to warp the little nipper than all the psychological trauma that Lie Bot or Lyle can intentionally inflict.
jackparsons
+0 -0
All children are voyeurs. They want to know how things work.
All children are voyeurs. They want to know how things work.
jar
+1 -0
"He also wouldn't want us to have This video"
I'm capitalizing all pronouns that refer to pornos from now on.
"He also wouldn't want us to have This video"
I'm capitalizing all pronouns that refer to pornos from now on.
jonesy
+0 -0
There is a question that begs to be asked...Could nice pete hear rod and pat? If he could, doesn't that make the whole situation crazier ?
There is a question that begs to be asked...Could nice pete hear rod and pat? If he could, doesn't that make the whole situation crazier ?
mrcool1122
+13 -0
"I Have Some Binoculars and I am Big Enough to Go Outside"
That should be the credo for the New York Times .
"I Have Some Binoculars and I am Big Enough to Go Outside"
That should be the credo for the New York Times .
kilovictorsierra
+1 -0
I realize that this sort of thing is anathema, but wouldn't mind an arc of Little Nephew getting sent to the Sir Chauncey Mason School For Young Jerks. Alternatively, I hope that the Sir Chauncey Mason School For Young Jerks is the name of a band sending Ray some hot tracks. I'd start a band with that name.
I realize that this sort of thing is anathema, but wouldn't mind an arc of Little Nephew getting sent to the Sir Chauncey Mason School For Young Jerks. Alternatively, I hope that the Sir Chauncey Mason School For Young Jerks is the name of a band sending Ray some hot tracks. I'd start a band with that name.
fielding
+0 -0
"I'd"? As in you would ? As in you haven't yet ?
Then who is sending Ray the hot tracks? Chop-chop!
"I'd"? As in you would ? As in you haven't yet ?
Then who is sending Ray the hot tracks? Chop-chop!
gothfae
+1 -0
The Who's 'Baba O'Riley' came on my iphone as I was reading this. I fear this imagery may have burned itself into the lyrics in my brain. "I don't need to be forgiven", indeed.
I'm all wasted.
The Who's 'Baba O'Riley' came on my iphone as I was reading this. I fear this imagery may have burned itself into the lyrics in my brain. "I don't need to be forgiven", indeed.
I'm all wasted.
untilyouaresonude
+0 -0
How is it that there's a cartoon that actually depicts gay sex today and Dr. Manflesh or whoever hasn't written an unneccessarily long post to coincide?
How is it that there's a cartoon that actually depicts gay sex today and Dr. Manflesh or whoever hasn't written an unneccessarily long post to coincide?
andrew_
+0 -1
because that would sorta make sense.
because that would sorta make sense.
honesttom
+1 -0
Yeah, I was waiting for Retardo to post about Onstad being in the closet and this being clear evidence of his secret desires or something. Ah well.
Yeah, I was waiting for Retardo to post about Onstad being in the closet and this being clear evidence of his secret desires or something. Ah well.
stuart
+3 -0
Ah, such as were the halcyon days of AssetBar.
Forsooth!
Ah, such as were the halcyon days of AssetBar.
Forsooth!
afkpuz
+1 -0
Y'know, Pat's doing pretty good for himself getting it on with a porn star.
He must be learning so much.
Y'know, Pat's doing pretty good for himself getting it on with a porn star.
He must be learning so much.
vreeeee
+1 -0
Everyone needs a project.
Everyone needs a project.
stevenc
+0 -0
A comment left by stevenc was marked as spam and excluded. stevenc: What a douche. (reported by madnes, twohundredninety, Jujubeesforjesus)
A comment left by stevenc was marked as spam and excluded. stevenc: What a douche. (reported by madnes, twohundredninety, Jujubeesforjesus)
stuart
+1 -1
Could someone please tell me what it takes to get spam marking privileges?
Could someone please tell me what it takes to get spam marking privileges?
dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately
+0 -0
A comment left by dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zefiel, jeofredo, equinn2006, onion_lightly, aperson)
A comment left by dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zefiel, jeofredo, equinn2006, onion_lightly, aperson)
gormster
+0 -0
Maybe not post spam constantly.
Maybe not post spam constantly.
dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately
+0 -0
A comment left by dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by featurelessvoid, havenless, aperson)
A comment left by dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by featurelessvoid, havenless, aperson)
plummet
+0 -0
chubby'd
chubby'd
havenless
+3 -1
Beef sounds like hes speaking in Klingon when hes vomitting.
Beef sounds like hes speaking in Klingon when hes vomitting.
henrythecad
+0 -0
I'd pay hella ducats to read Ray's mail.
I'd pay hella ducats to read Ray's mail.
catachresis
+1 -0
I was all pissed off because I have been on my holdays and the previous strips were a little tame/consfusing. But this is probably the best Friday Facts ever. All is well.
I was all pissed off because I have been on my holdays and the previous strips were a little tame/consfusing. But this is probably the best Friday Facts ever. All is well.
plezure
+0 -0
A comment left by plezure was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Solle, Homepie, blastradius, wae)
A comment left by plezure was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Solle, Homepie, blastradius, wae)
gussiejives
+2 -0
Philippe saw THE OLYMPICS!
Philippe saw THE OLYMPICS!
hikikomori
+1 -0
I-No! It was Superman! He was having a really bad day! Don't look!
I-No! It was Superman! He was having a really bad day! Don't look!
katsura
+1 -0
APPLESAUCE.
APPLESAUCE.
foolishsparrow
+2 -0
a strange little part of me really wants to be Teodor's online girlfriend.
a strange little part of me really wants to be Teodor's online girlfriend.
featurelessvoid
+2 -0
A strange little part of Dr. Manflesh is probably writing the fan fiction for that as we speak.
A strange little part of Dr. Manflesh is probably writing the fan fiction for that as we speak.
serf
+0 -1
AP-AP-AP
AP-AP-AP
luckyg
+0 -0
I saw this.
I saw this.
evolume
+1 -1
man, we need the new strip NOW. or at least something else to comment on.
man, we need the new strip NOW. or at least something else to comment on.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
A comment left by fineoakstructure was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by katsura, neuscha, biff)
A comment left by fineoakstructure was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by katsura, neuscha, biff)
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
bah...fuck it. that was my first time trying that BBcode shit. who needs the strip, anyways? we all know it's Lyle.
bah...fuck it. that was my first time trying that BBcode shit. who needs the strip, anyways? we all know it's Lyle.
tombsgrave
+0 -2
Is time standing still? Am I going mad? No! Must be strong... must not talk to myself in front of strangers. Mustn't.
Is time standing still? Am I going mad? No! Must be strong... must not talk to myself in front of strangers. Mustn't.
dreamerman91
+1 -0
FINISHED ARCHIVE!
FINISHED ARCHIVE!
moraiat
+0 -0
This strip made the top 5 most commented, thanks to: The Onion discussion/Onstad pic; A generally awesome Friday Facts; and a late Tuesday strip
This strip made the top 5 most commented, thanks to: The Onion discussion/Onstad pic; A generally awesome Friday Facts; and a late Tuesday strip
songbirdspectre
+2 -0
it's tuesday, and no new strip. maaaaan. :(
it's tuesday, and no new strip. maaaaan. :(
molesticide
+0 -0
chris, your photo looks like it was taken by the school paper after you won the physics olympics' mousetrap car event.
you cannot afford to be this late with the new strip.
unless you're dead. oh shit, what if...!
chris, your photo looks like it was taken by the school paper after you won the physics olympics' mousetrap car event.
you cannot afford to be this late with the new strip.
unless you're dead. oh shit, what if...!
slashtoe
+0 -0
Oh great now he took down "The strip will be back Tuesday"
Oh great now he took down "The strip will be back Tuesday"
joeyvig
+2 -0
Teodor would probably go out tonight if he had a stitch to wear.
Teodor would probably go out tonight if he had a stitch to wear.
gmm
+0 -0
You brilliant, brilliant man.
You brilliant, brilliant man.
erinye
+0 -0
Charming, even.
Charming, even.
mygoodfriend
+0 -0
Chase the dream, Pat.
Chase the dream, Pat.
nicolae
+0 -0
Philippe's titling of his adult-content photograph of Pat and Huggins is reminiscent of Goya's black paintings, revealing how internally disturbed he was at the sight. "This I saw..."
Philippe's titling of his adult-content photograph of Pat and Huggins is reminiscent of Goya's black paintings, revealing how internally disturbed he was at the sight. "This I saw..."
tbtabby
+0 -0
Huggins.
Pat.
They're cops.
Huggins.
Pat.
They're cops.
seanbad
+0 -0
For some reason, the alt text for this strip on the main, non-Asset-Bar site is now "Bring beef and sugar into the strike of it."
For some reason, the alt text for this strip on the main, non-Asset-Bar site is now "Bring beef and sugar into the strike of it."
fosters
+0 -0
I'm not sure which was my favorite part, either "God says we should not have opinions" or Nice Pete eating chicken like a madman.
I'm not sure which was my favorite part, either "God says we should not have opinions" or Nice Pete eating chicken like a madman.
hellofditties
+0 -0
Do you guys smile and frown when you're eating drumsticks? Maybe it's just me, but I think that would make a body look more insane than not.
Do you guys smile and frown when you're eating drumsticks? Maybe it's just me, but I think that would make a body look more insane than not.
stormagnet
+1 -0
For me, the creepy factor was the expressionlessness while methodically snapping the bones, not the eating itself- though single-handedly downing an entire bucket of drumsticks is pretty disturbing too, come to think of it.
For me, the creepy factor was the expressionlessness while methodically snapping the bones, not the eating itself- though single-handedly downing an entire bucket of drumsticks is pretty disturbing too, come to think of it.
hellofditties
+0 -0
Oops I chubbied that as I tried to reply. I am new to this.
Crap, now I forget what I was going to say.
Oops I chubbied that as I tried to reply. I am new to this.
Crap, now I forget what I was going to say.
professorhazard
+0 -0
For me, the creepy factor was that he was emotionlessly eating and murdering chicken drumsticks while cop roleplay sodomy was going on in an adjacent room.
For me, the creepy factor was that he was emotionlessly eating and murdering chicken drumsticks while cop roleplay sodomy was going on in an adjacent room.
biznart
+1 -0
Favorite Friday Facts from Philippe. Fantastic.
Favorite Friday Facts from Philippe. Fantastic.
unclesma
+0 -0
Chubbed for alliteration. Almost.
Chubbed for alliteration. Almost.
howl
+0 -0
Whaddaya mean, almost?
Whaddaya mean, almost?
fatcat
+0 -0
Things I adore about this strip, and Why It Is A Five:
1. Upper-case T in "...He also wouldn't want us to have This video."
2. " curious doctors? "
3. He does not smile or frown.
4. The fact that "MAILBOX, CON'T" is directly after "MAILBOX MINUTE."
Things I adore about this strip, and Why It Is A Five:
1. Upper-case T in "...He also wouldn't want us to have This video."
2. " curious doctors? "
3. He does not smile or frown.
4. The fact that "MAILBOX, CON'T" is directly after "MAILBOX MINUTE."
Who has a scan of this interview in the print edition of The Onion? I need to read it ... bad.
The face of Onstad is revealed.
He looks as if he drew himself.
WHAT?!?!?!?! You get to see his face? Preposterous!
I merely assume it is Onstad. It may be Lonis Edison's Patented Media Proxy, which would also not be out of the question.
The real Onstad all sitting on a park bench not far away, watching over the top of the newspaper. Gene Hackman in a van one block away, listening to signal triangulated from three different parabolic mics.
Its a full frontal face shot, a photo!
The interview also refers to the fact that it's the first photo of himself he's published in connection with achewood. So yes, it's him. He looks pretty regular, actually. Not much of a thrill.
For the sake of us all, good sir, scan this.
A comment left by nbgreene was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by kylank, equinn2006, lateadopter)
If you don't feel confident about posting it, surely you can email it to someone as an attachment. There must be hundreds of us who would do it. You could email it to me at biffly1@cox.net. Or not. Whatever.
A comment left by nbgreene was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by twohundredninety, equinn2006, lateadopter)
I apologize. I meant no disrespect.
Thanks to nbgreene
[IMGS OFF]
Please don't give the chubbies to me, give them to nbgreene . I was just the technician, he actually provided the picture.
Now in color!
[IMGS OFF]
Hah, he does look like one of his characters - I'm thinking Emeril with a dash of Mr. Bear.
A comment left by primal_in_the_mane was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by alexhhhh, equinn2006, DanS, morbo)
What's really funny is he looks a lot like my weed dealer. I mean, a LOT.
Maybe you buy pot from Chris Onstad and you just never realized it.
That would be pretty much the best thing ever.
Nothing personal, Onstad, I just want to jump your bones, right there, on the cathedral grounds.
A comment left by achilleselbow was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by mikekitchell, thehempfandango, TheGreatestCape, NumberKillinger)
Who said you had to draw a successful webcomic, sugar plums?
For some reason my mom thought Onstad was Asian.
You should get her apology letter in the mail soon, Mr. Onstad. She is very serious about these things.
Man maybe Onstad is Asian. Is there a lot we know about the man?
Also you cannot see his eyes to determine whether or not he has Epicanthal folds.
He said in his achwood-world blog that he was mostly white and 1/16th Shawnee, so he is not Asian. I would link it but I can't remember which entry it was.
Onstad is Goth as Fuck.
does he take baths?
With candles and the lights off.
I'm a big fan of situations that allow someone to say "Please don't give the chubbies to me" in complete seriousness.
Huh. So that's what Onstad looks like.
Surprisingly normal.
I always thought he'd be fat. I dunno- Just with all the cooking, and if you look at the members-only comics, you can see a pic of his McDonald's Monopoly Game board, which shows a soul that has consumed far too much of the Golden Arches.
I'm not talking Scott Kurtz size here, but maybe a few lbs overweight. That's all.
I think it's a bit much to call the guy "fat". He certainly has a very round face, and it is a bit suspicious that he chose such a gut-concealing pose, but I think he looks pretty good for a middle-aged guy with a toddler who considers golf to be excercise. Plus, that's a nice sporty outfit; seems very "rich guy casual". My man-crush remains untarnished.
Dude, the man is 32. That ain't no middle-aged.
Christfuck I hope not
as i planned to live forever.I don't think he was calling Onstad fat. I think he was expressing surprise that he's not.
I dunno man. I was expecting extra-normal. He has a nifty round head upon which Those Glasses look especially fine with That Hair. He could possibly have a supporting role in some sort of Matrix side project. He might be an enigmatic technician. These are just ideas I'm having here.
Oh good, you thought of Laurence Fishburne as well.
https://www.divshare.com/download/1476749-a3d
Chris Onstad: The Middle Cat.
i would guess youngest cat in the family of 2 or more siblings
not ray, not pat.
not weird, not fat
man dude is Sleek. He just got off of the autobahn, on a ride into the Future.
WHERE IS THE PDF?? I CANT FIND NO LINK!!!
https://www.divshare.com/download/1476749-a3d
Onstad interview from the onion, scanned.
You're welcome.