lucidz
+0 -0
"Tidy, no?" Indeed Cornelius. Indeed.
"Tidy, no?" Indeed Cornelius. Indeed.
courtland
+0 -0
I did not know Cornelius was Spanish, no?
I did not know Cornelius was Spanish, no?
missbee
+2 -0
Not Spanish, just badass.
Not Spanish, just badass.
pmbarrett
+0 -0
this can be read so that the last two words don't explains anything about cornelius, but form a two-word address to the person spoken to--Not Spanish, just badass!
this can be read so that the last two words don't explains anything about cornelius, but form a two-word address to the person spoken to--Not Spanish, just badass!
woodenteeth
+1 -0
... or entirely reflecting the speech pattern of the French dude from a few strips ago.
... or entirely reflecting the speech pattern of the French dude from a few strips ago.
pmbarrett
+2 -0
i also did not know this thing which is not true.
i also did not know this thing which is not true.
spazdor
+0 -0
Maybe ju and heem are friends.
Maybe ju and heem are friends.
cracklewater
+1 -0
I love you, Cornelius.
I love you, Chris Onstad.
I love you, Cornelius.
I love you, Chris Onstad.
mockereo
+3 -0
Cornelius is so neat. Even his sound effects are pared down to the essentials. "S'P"
Cornelius is so neat. Even his sound effects are pared down to the essentials. "S'P"
hamscout
+16 -0
Indeed. He's so unselfish, he even drinks while thinking of others...
There is no "I" in "sip"...
Indeed. He's so unselfish, he even drinks while thinking of others...
There is no "I" in "sip"...
scorpio_nadir
+2 -0
Cornelius is meditatively drinking a concoction called Zen. There is no 'I'.
Cornelius is meditatively drinking a concoction called Zen. There is no 'I'.
smallblackdog
+0 -0
There is no.
There is no.
usversusthem
+0 -0
There is.
There is.
sidemeat
+0 -0
No.
No.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
There
There
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
there
there
gertrudestein
+1 -0
i lol'd
i lol'd
cracklewater
+0 -0
jeffspaulding comforts chriscrocker.
jeffspaulding is a kind man.
jeffspaulding comforts chriscrocker.
jeffspaulding is a kind man.
fattypneumonia
+0 -0
whoa, i quickly read cracklewater's post as
jeffspaulding comforts cocksucker.
jeffspaulding is a kind man.
whoa, i quickly read cracklewater's post as
jeffspaulding comforts cocksucker.
jeffspaulding is a kind man.
cracklewater
+0 -0
It is very easy to mix up the terms 'Chris Crocker' and 'cocksucker'. The two ideas are almost interchangeable.
It is very easy to mix up the terms 'Chris Crocker' and 'cocksucker'. The two ideas are almost interchangeable.
changuitotuerto
+0 -0
changuitotuerto
+0 -0
.
.
duperando
+1 -0
That is always a hard lesson, realizing that something is not as beautiful and golden as you always remembered it being.
I remember when I went back and visited my old house that I had lived in from birth to age 4. There was a stone horse head that I always remember touching when I was little. When I came back, I expected it to be that same huge horse head that I remembered, but it was actually pretty small. It was such a huge disappointment to realize that as a child, I had grossly exaggerated the awesomeness of that horse head. It was definitely a defining moment in my life.
That is always a hard lesson, realizing that something is not as beautiful and golden as you always remembered it being.
I remember when I went back and visited my old house that I had lived in from birth to age 4. There was a stone horse head that I always remember touching when I was little. When I came back, I expected it to be that same huge horse head that I remembered, but it was actually pretty small. It was such a huge disappointment to realize that as a child, I had grossly exaggerated the awesomeness of that horse head. It was definitely a defining moment in my life.
pmbarrett
+1 -0
i remember coming back to that house to, except instead of having a nostalgic remembrance shattered i was run off the property by your uptight family.
i remember coming back to that house to, except instead of having a nostalgic remembrance shattered i was run off the property by your uptight family.
duperando
+0 -0
Yeah, my family always did hate those crazy muppet-looking creatures. Dad got even got a tazer for each time the crazies came by.
Such good memories ...
Yeah, my family always did hate those crazy muppet-looking creatures. Dad got even got a tazer for each time the crazies came by.
Such good memories ...
tarranon
+5 -0
When duperando says horse head, he does not mean what you want horse head to mean
When duperando says horse head, he does not mean what you want horse head to mean
barthdrooks
+0 -0
I have a chubby for you now. The other kind.
I have a chubby for you now. The other kind.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
The one he doesn't want it to mean.
The one he doesn't want it to mean.
randyleepublic
+0 -0
When I was a kid, we used to go eat a Friendly's Restaurant. It was a classy temple of burger and shake worship. Now? A thinly glorified Wendy's. I don't think I was overawed when I was a kid - I think that Friendly's just went way down-market. However, when I mentioned it to my Mom, I had to jog and jog her memory to get her to recall our family ritual, so perhaps my childhood impression was exaggerated...
When I was a kid, we used to go eat a Friendly's Restaurant. It was a classy temple of burger and shake worship. Now? A thinly glorified Wendy's. I don't think I was overawed when I was a kid - I think that Friendly's just went way down-market. However, when I mentioned it to my Mom, I had to jog and jog her memory to get her to recall our family ritual, so perhaps my childhood impression was exaggerated...
mattylite
+0 -0
I still refuse to believe that it was me getting bigger, not the cinnamon honey role at Country Kitchen getting smaller.
I still refuse to believe that it was me getting bigger, not the cinnamon honey role at Country Kitchen getting smaller.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
It's not the size of the stone horse head, it's how it's applied.
It's not the size of the stone horse head, it's how it's applied.
mensch
+1 -0
Speech recognition software error.
"horse head" should be "whore's head"
Speech recognition software error.
"horse head" should be "whore's head"
sleaw
+0 -0
I remember another Achewood reader thinking the same about his old stuffed bear, but then he went to check on it and reported back that it was still friggin' huge .
I... I was kind of hoping for something similar with your comment. Now it hurts twice as much.
I remember another Achewood reader thinking the same about his old stuffed bear, but then he went to check on it and reported back that it was still friggin' huge .
I... I was kind of hoping for something similar with your comment. Now it hurts twice as much.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
Then this will cheer you up: when I went to a prairie museum at the age of 3, there was an enormous, giant, leaping bull, looming over my head in the dim light of the gallery.
When I went back at age 6, I was disappointed to find it only a taxidermied cow. I even asked the attendant about the bull, and was assured this was all there was.
When I was 14, though, I found some old snapshots of the place, and discovered that yes, there really was a bull, leaping, and yes it was huge. I was vindicated.
Then this will cheer you up: when I went to a prairie museum at the age of 3, there was an enormous, giant, leaping bull, looming over my head in the dim light of the gallery.
When I went back at age 6, I was disappointed to find it only a taxidermied cow. I even asked the attendant about the bull, and was assured this was all there was.
When I was 14, though, I found some old snapshots of the place, and discovered that yes, there really was a bull, leaping, and yes it was huge. I was vindicated.
shelbydavis
+2 -0
I made a final trip back at 19 and found the bull, still huge, and in addition a GIANT FREAKING BEAR. Everyone wins.
I made a final trip back at 19 and found the bull, still huge, and in addition a GIANT FREAKING BEAR. Everyone wins.
sleaw
+0 -0
Thank you!
Thank you!
duperando
+0 -0
So heartwarming.
So heartwarming.
belgand
+2 -0
The moral: you can have amazing gay sex at the museum, you just have to be persistant.
The moral: you can have amazing gay sex at the museum, you just have to be persistant.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
Well I went to this cool University museum when I was about that age and they had all these scary dinosaur skeletons, but the coolest thing, these shrunken heads in a case, about fist-sized, foot-long hair, all mouths and eyes sewed shut.
They moved that museum into a gorgeous modern building 50 years later, the dinosaurs look horrifying still, but the shrunken heads are gone, ironically sacrificed to Political Correctness.
Man oh man, they were cool.
Can you imagine one of those bad oscars swinging from your belt by the hair? They even had detailed description how the headhunters used to shrink them, and I remember every step of it.
I...I feel a movie script lurking here somewhere.
Well I went to this cool University museum when I was about that age and they had all these scary dinosaur skeletons, but the coolest thing, these shrunken heads in a case, about fist-sized, foot-long hair, all mouths and eyes sewed shut.
They moved that museum into a gorgeous modern building 50 years later, the dinosaurs look horrifying still, but the shrunken heads are gone, ironically sacrificed to Political Correctness.
Man oh man, they were cool.
Can you imagine one of those bad oscars swinging from your belt by the hair? They even had detailed description how the headhunters used to shrink them, and I remember every step of it.
I...I feel a movie script lurking here somewhere.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Yes, you had to use progressively smaller coconuts to hold the shape as they dried and shrunk, seems to me. And sew the lips and eyelids shut. Maybe some kind of curing solution to dip them in. Just haven't done one in a coon's age!
Yes, you had to use progressively smaller coconuts to hold the shape as they dried and shrunk, seems to me. And sew the lips and eyelids shut. Maybe some kind of curing solution to dip them in. Just haven't done one in a coon's age!
mockereo
+0 -0
hey is "coon's age" racist? I never know. I hear old people say it and I dunno if its just because they're old and don't understand how racism works, or if its actually acceptable.
am i insinuating granularsilica is an outdated, doddering fool? maybe.
hey is "coon's age" racist? I never know. I hear old people say it and I dunno if its just because they're old and don't understand how racism works, or if its actually acceptable.
am i insinuating granularsilica is an outdated, doddering fool? maybe.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
it's kind of an assetbar tradition.
it's kind of an assetbar tradition.
mensch
+0 -0
Next you'll be saying grandpappy was racist when he used to say eenie meenie miney mo . . .
Next you'll be saying grandpappy was racist when he used to say eenie meenie miney mo . . .
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
I was referring to him calling pogo an out-of-touch old man.
I was referring to him calling pogo an out-of-touch old man.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Isn't "out-of-touch old [...]" kind of redundant? OH. GODDAMN. HUGE slam on the elderly out of nowhere.
I kid, I love the old folks, especially pogo/sand_granules and my grandparents.
Isn't "out-of-touch old [...]" kind of redundant? OH. GODDAMN. HUGE slam on the elderly out of nowhere.
I kid, I love the old folks, especially pogo/sand_granules and my grandparents.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Anyone can decide to stop growing, stop trying new things, and you don't have time for everything -- I know of D&D through my son, for instance. But after Woodstock, I've had no trouble keeping up with music, and film ... it's a state of mind, not your clock age.
Anyone can decide to stop growing, stop trying new things, and you don't have time for everything -- I know of D&D through my son, for instance. But after Woodstock, I've had no trouble keeping up with music, and film ... it's a state of mind, not your clock age.
rowboat
+2 -0
I've done a little research on this because I love saying that but was always scared to for fear of offending someone. I don't remember the specifics, but the end result is that it's not.
I wouldn't suggest saying it around any coons, though.
I've done a little research on this because I love saying that but was always scared to for fear of offending someone. I don't remember the specifics, but the end result is that it's not.
I wouldn't suggest saying it around any coons, though.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
Well, occasionally a raccoon is found which is supposed to be really old. Given that black people being chased by white people don't have the greatest life expectancy, I'd guess the saying is about the animal.
Well, occasionally a raccoon is found which is supposed to be really old. Given that black people being chased by white people don't have the greatest life expectancy, I'd guess the saying is about the animal.
belgand
+0 -0
A lot of people also don't understand the word "niggardly" either.
A lot of people also don't understand the word "niggardly" either.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
Or "picnic." It's French, dumbass.
Or "picnic." It's French, dumbass.
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Or "crowbar". Someone tried to tell me about some imagined connection to Jim Crow once, and I laughed in his face.
And that's a particularly pointed pet peeve of mine: all three of the above words have perfectly acceptable etymologies that have nothing to do with their perceived racial origins, yet people still subscribe to the High Noon theory of objects; that "When the legend becomes fact, print the legend." They're perfectly cromulent words, fer Chrissakes.
Or "crowbar". Someone tried to tell me about some imagined connection to Jim Crow once, and I laughed in his face.
And that's a particularly pointed pet peeve of mine: all three of the above words have perfectly acceptable etymologies that have nothing to do with their perceived racial origins, yet people still subscribe to the High Noon theory of objects; that "When the legend becomes fact, print the legend." They're perfectly cromulent words, fer Chrissakes.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Or that African country/river called "Niger."
Or that African country/river called "Niger."
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Coon-Man say you very racist!
In actuality, it is an harchaic reference to the time of the mythical raccoon.
Coon-Man say you very racist!
In actuality, it is an harchaic reference to the time of the mythical raccoon.
granularsilica
+0 -0
https://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1536/whats-the-origin-of-coons-age
Should clear things up.
https://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1536/whats-the-origin-of-coons-age
Should clear things up.
mensch
+0 -0
no wonder my coon-hound has been no good at keepin' 'em off my lawn
no wonder my coon-hound has been no good at keepin' 'em off my lawn
mensch
+0 -0
by "'em" I mean rustic country-bumpkins.
(whadda ya think I meant)
by "'em" I mean rustic country-bumpkins.
(whadda ya think I meant)
mockereo
+0 -0
porch monkeys.
its okay, i'm taking it back!
porch monkeys.
its okay, i'm taking it back!
stereo
+0 -0
It's okay, he's taking it black!
It's okay, he's taking it black!
pmbarrett
+0 -0
please describe in detail your brutal murder of the attendant at age 14.
please describe in detail your brutal murder of the attendant at age 14.
nice-on-water
+2 -0
No one will ever be disappointed by the giant blue whale hanging in the Sea Critters room of the Museum of Natural History, that is for sure. I never am.
No one will ever be disappointed by the giant blue whale hanging in the Sea Critters room of the Museum of Natural History, that is for sure. I never am.
notdavidbowie
+0 -0
Chubbied as the passion of a whale biologist.
Chubbied as the passion of a whale biologist.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
The sequel Mel Gibson will never get around to making.
The sequel Mel Gibson will never get around to making.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
In association with Vandelay Industries.
In association with Vandelay Industries.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
In which one man... calls 'em as he sees 'em.
In which one man... calls 'em as he sees 'em.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Word on a street is that Oceanic 815 is becoming a movie.
Word on a street is that Oceanic 815 is becoming a movie.
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
Just one specific street though.
Just one specific street though.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
The East Street, hopefully.
The East Street, hopefully.
granularsilica
+1 -0
I heard it on Easy Street.
I heard it on Easy Street.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
I remember waking up to that horse head IN MY BED!!!
Disappointment does not begin to describe.
I remember waking up to that horse head IN MY BED!!!
Disappointment does not begin to describe.
rearadmiral
+0 -0
its all about T's introspective and sad expression in the 2nd to last strip. Remembering the past while feeling for what phillipe now going through.
its all about T's introspective and sad expression in the 2nd to last strip. Remembering the past while feeling for what phillipe now going through.
w_w
+0 -0
For all the DeNeuve doubters: Connie says he's LEGIT!
For all the DeNeuve doubters: Connie says he's LEGIT!
edana
+0 -0
"His 'childhood' chapter was never properly closed"--is Philippe going to turn six?!
"His 'childhood' chapter was never properly closed"--is Philippe going to turn six?!
achtung
+17 -2
i hope philippe turns six just to shut you mother fucking kneejerk quoters up
i hope philippe turns six just to shut you mother fucking kneejerk quoters up
pmbarrett
+7 -0
I hope he cold turns six on your asses.
I hope he cold turns six on your asses.
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Men seldom make passes
At mother fucking kneejerk quoters who wear six-year-old otters on their asses
Men seldom make passes
At mother fucking kneejerk quoters who wear six-year-old otters on their asses
zombiezero
+1 -0
Turn the FUCK out of six, Philippe!
Turn the FUCK out of six, Philippe!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
No, you shut up.
No, you shut up.
jay_wish
+1 -0
Phillipe is five.
Phillipe is five.
spazdor
+1 -0
don't look now jay but i think achtung's talking shit about you
don't look now jay but i think achtung's talking shit about you
jay_wish
+0 -0
S'not my fault, just the way it is. Phillipe IS five. An immutable law of the Acheverse as far as I'm concerned.
S'not my fault, just the way it is. Phillipe IS five. An immutable law of the Acheverse as far as I'm concerned.
motu
+1 -0
This is true. If you want to change P=5 you'll have to alter the gravitational constant of the universe and the speed of light along with it.
This is true. If you want to change P=5 you'll have to alter the gravitational constant of the universe and the speed of light along with it.
dacapn
+0 -0
fo shizzle. upside down otters all up ins, and daaaark too
fo shizzle. upside down otters all up ins, and daaaark too
shelbydavis
+0 -0
And the manual stands on Phillipe.
And the manual stands on Phillipe.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
While Cornelius stands on ceremony.
While Cornelius stands on ceremony.
dacapn
+0 -0
and lyle stands up that homely girl from the cornerstore. just to read today's issue of "completely ruined junk"
and lyle stands up that homely girl from the cornerstore. just to read today's issue of "completely ruined junk"
mensch
+3 -0
Q: What do you get if you date dacapn's mother?
A: Quote:
Q: What do you get if you date dacapn's mother?
A: Quote:
completely ruined junk
deus
+0 -0
question now is...WILL he STILL be five?!
question now is...WILL he STILL be five?!
odog
+4 -0
The sound effects in the sixth and antepenultimate panels are especially pleasing to me.
The sound effects in the sixth and antepenultimate panels are especially pleasing to me.
telescreen
+2 -0
Chubby for proper and appropriate use of antepenultimate.
Chubby for proper and appropriate use of antepenultimate.
fattypneumonia
+1 -0
Chubbies to both of you for raising the level of discourse, and celebrating the English language.
Chubbies to both of you for raising the level of discourse, and celebrating the English language.
ratacattt
+2 -0
durr ayeee want inline images back durr durr DURRRR
durr ayeee want inline images back durr durr DURRRR
DDDDDDDDUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRR
telescreen
+0 -0
I can do this in Spanish also.
(Puedo hacerlo en español también.)
I can do this in Spanish also.
(Puedo hacerlo en español también.)
azairborne
+1 -0
So that's why I "get something stuck in my eye" when I cook my elderly parents the best dinner they've had all year, each year, at Christmas. Understanding that this is the only time that what they are eating has not at some point been frozen hurts; it still doesn't, however, keep me from enjoying the original Transformers animated movie (1984, set in the futuristic year of 2005) with my 5yr old. I love knowing that she is already more hip than all the high-school seniors I teach every day.
So that's why I "get something stuck in my eye" when I cook my elderly parents the best dinner they've had all year, each year, at Christmas. Understanding that this is the only time that what they are eating has not at some point been frozen hurts; it still doesn't, however, keep me from enjoying the original Transformers animated movie (1984, set in the futuristic year of 2005) with my 5yr old. I love knowing that she is already more hip than all the high-school seniors I teach every day.
mockereo
+0 -0
i don't understand it at all, but i think that "our little shaver" is a pretty cute nickname.
i don't understand it at all, but i think that "our little shaver" is a pretty cute nickname.
tifunkalicious
+0 -0
December 29, 2004 maybe?
I'm not being smug, it's just my best guess
December 29, 2004 maybe?
I'm not being smug, it's just my best guess
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Actually it's short for "shaveling" meaning a young boy.
Actually it's short for "shaveling" meaning a young boy.
rowboat
+0 -0
A Big Dick for a Little Shaver
That's the title of the porn video I found in my uncle's room when I was young which forever ruined that turn of phrase for me.
A Big Dick for a Little Shaver
That's the title of the porn video I found in my uncle's room when I was young which forever ruined that turn of phrase for me.
rowboat
+2 -0
It should be immediately mentioned that a "little shaver" in this case was a woman with shaved pubics. Not a little boy. Though my uncle didn't have very good sense when it came to hiding pornography and drugs from his seven-year-old nephew, he was not a Terrible Man.
It should be immediately mentioned that a "little shaver" in this case was a woman with shaved pubics. Not a little boy. Though my uncle didn't have very good sense when it came to hiding pornography and drugs from his seven-year-old nephew, he was not a Terrible Man.
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
oh there is laughter and there is so much of it and it is coming from me out loud in my home.
oh there is laughter and there is so much of it and it is coming from me out loud in my home.
jeffspaulding
+3 -0
Then for God's sake put your trousers on!
Then for God's sake put your trousers on!
i_love_kate
+0 -0
The laughter is coming from inside the house?
The laughter is coming from inside the house?
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
The laughter is coming from inside my trousers.
The laughter is coming from inside my trousers.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Even distressinger!
Even distressinger!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
:)
:)
nullzero
+0 -0
Well, Yelp's ratings got it right, and we should all be ashamed for doubting Mr. Steven DeNauve's credentials simply because we disliked his appearance. I, for one, humbly admit I was wrong in misjudging Steve's character. For now.
Well, Yelp's ratings got it right, and we should all be ashamed for doubting Mr. Steven DeNauve's credentials simply because we disliked his appearance. I, for one, humbly admit I was wrong in misjudging Steve's character. For now.
mockereo
+1 -0
You are so presumptuous to assume that Steve's full name is Steven. And then you were arrogant enough to misspell his last name? And I don't even want to get into your sneaky backdoor "For now" escape clause. Jeez.
God, I would not accept that apology with a ten foot pole.
You are so presumptuous to assume that Steve's full name is Steven. And then you were arrogant enough to misspell his last name? And I don't even want to get into your sneaky backdoor "For now" escape clause. Jeez.
God, I would not accept that apology with a ten foot pole.
duck
+2 -0
I don't want to get into your sneaky backdoor either.
I don't want to get into your sneaky backdoor either.
randyleepublic
+0 -0
I think Phillipe is now free. Free to *shudder* mature. I have only myself to blame. Yes.
I think Phillipe is now free. Free to *shudder* mature. I have only myself to blame. Yes.
xi
+0 -0
Phillipe turns 6 this year. Hory cow guys.
Phillipe turns 6 this year. Hory cow guys.
i_love_kate
+5 -0
Hoary? Or whorey? Because actually your mother could be described aptly as both.
Hoary? Or whorey? Because actually your mother could be described aptly as both.
dacapn
+0 -0
oooohhh sucka!
oooohhh sucka!
granularsilica
+2 -0
Finally, a low blow out of nowhere.
Finally, a low blow out of nowhere.
onearmdude
+0 -0
Beautiful strip.
Is that the collar of his sweater blending in a bit or is Teodor developing a flabby neck?
Beautiful strip.
Is that the collar of his sweater blending in a bit or is Teodor developing a flabby neck?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
This is the eternal question.
This is the eternal question.
rowboat
+3 -0
Yes, Onstad. Tidy, indeed.
Between this and North Korean Magical Realism I think it's safe to say that he has fully recovered his ability to craft a great arc after a couple of years of fairly unfortunate missteps in that area. All is well.
Yes, Onstad. Tidy, indeed.
Between this and North Korean Magical Realism I think it's safe to say that he has fully recovered his ability to craft a great arc after a couple of years of fairly unfortunate missteps in that area. All is well.
karljw
+0 -0
i don't know, i thought this strip drifted a little too far into pseudo-psychology, but that's just my take.
i don't know, i thought this strip drifted a little too far into pseudo-psychology, but that's just my take.
puguglypress
+6 -0
Your MOM drifted a little too far into my DICK!
Your MOM drifted a little too far into my DICK!
dangelder
+0 -0
HUGE slam on puguglypress's own dick out of nowhere!
HUGE slam on puguglypress's own dick out of nowhere!
mockereo
+0 -0
the slam was huge because the mother in question was so FAT.
HAH
the slam was huge because the mother in question was so FAT.
HAH
rowboat
+0 -0
Did you hear the one about the fat mom who sat around the house?
Did you hear the one about the fat mom who sat around the house?
rowboat
+5 -0
She had some health problems and abused the welfare system pretty bad.
She had some health problems and abused the welfare system pretty bad.
stereo
+1 -0
I dunno, I feel like the welfare system is paying these people not to be in front of me in the line at the grocery store.
Which is a service I would totally pay for.
I dunno, I feel like the welfare system is paying these people not to be in front of me in the line at the grocery store.
Which is a service I would totally pay for.
invidious
+0 -0
Some got on the mayor!
Some got on the mayor!
belgand
+0 -0
While the North Korean arc really felt aimless to me, this one really didn't seem to suffer from the same amount of flab. Maybe one less strip of disaffected Philippe alone at home, but still a very tight arc that clearly seemed to have it's destination in mind ahead of time.
While the North Korean arc really felt aimless to me, this one really didn't seem to suffer from the same amount of flab. Maybe one less strip of disaffected Philippe alone at home, but still a very tight arc that clearly seemed to have it's destination in mind ahead of time.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
The North Korean arc was the Hindenburg of arcs. Like a North Korean ICBM, it did not rise above the earth's bounds, it did not arc, it only sputtered and launched aimlessly.
The North Korean arc was the Hindenburg of arcs. Like a North Korean ICBM, it did not rise above the earth's bounds, it did not arc, it only sputtered and launched aimlessly.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
...without warning.
Which is what she complained about the morning after.
...without warning.
Which is what she complained about the morning after.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Hiiii-yo!
Hiiii-yo!
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Cornelius is reliably my favourite character. If I ever said differently before, I was simply lying in order to try and get into bed with someone.
Cornelius is reliably my favourite character. If I ever said differently before, I was simply lying in order to try and get into bed with someone.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Also I am somewhat perturbed by Cornelius' "An hysterical aunt." Cornelius cannot possibly be using the kind of common Mid-to-Northern English accent that would leave the enunciation of an aitch off a word like "hysterical" and thus necessitate an "an". What the devil's going on?
Also I am somewhat perturbed by Cornelius' "An hysterical aunt." Cornelius cannot possibly be using the kind of common Mid-to-Northern English accent that would leave the enunciation of an aitch off a word like "hysterical" and thus necessitate an "an". What the devil's going on?
dacapn
+1 -0
he leaves the h off or you get the hose again. hes just being nice.
he leaves the h off or you get the hose again. hes just being nice.
lynnym
+0 -0
I have known American persons to do this. It is apparently very correct.
I have known American persons to do this. It is apparently very correct.
lynnym
+0 -0
Even when the h is pronounced, it still counts as needing an an. Really.
Even when the h is pronounced, it still counts as needing an an. Really.
mattylite
+1 -0
Ya, that rule has always driven me crazy. The only reason it would need to be "an" instead of "a" in the first place is if you didn't pronounce the "h," which nobody doesn't in the U.S. and I don't know, do like only rich people leave out in England or something? Anyway it's a stupid rule I take an extremely firm, even more extremely inconsequential stance against, FOREVER.
Ya, that rule has always driven me crazy. The only reason it would need to be "an" instead of "a" in the first place is if you didn't pronounce the "h," which nobody doesn't in the U.S. and I don't know, do like only rich people leave out in England or something? Anyway it's a stupid rule I take an extremely firm, even more extremely inconsequential stance against, FOREVER.
radioelectric
+0 -0
You only really here it over here when news broadcasters are covering some sort of significant occasion, they put a special effort in to say "an historic event" and it drives me nuts!
You only really here it over here when news broadcasters are covering some sort of significant occasion, they put a special effort in to say "an historic event" and it drives me nuts!
radioelectric
+0 -0
*hear goddammit!
*hear goddammit!
mockereo
+7 -0
HEY while we're talking about grammar i support adopting "their" as a gender-neutral, singular possesive third person pronoun. So we can get rid of that "his or her" jibber-jabba .
HEY while we're talking about grammar i support adopting "their" as a gender-neutral, singular possesive third person pronoun. So we can get rid of that "his or her" jibber-jabba .
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Hear hear. I've had quite enough of those unnecessary edits to my papers. It's NOT "his or her", it's THEIR. GET OVER IT.
Hear hear. I've had quite enough of those unnecessary edits to my papers. It's NOT "his or her", it's THEIR. GET OVER IT.
granularsilica
+1 -0
Even more jarring is when articles alternately use "her" and "his" in examples.
But, "When a student asks for their book," is simply wrong. Try to make the subject plural as well.
Actually, a lot of people would enjoy using the indefinite "it" as in, "When a student asks for its book."
Even more jarring is when articles alternately use "her" and "his" in examples.
But, "When a student asks for their book," is simply wrong. Try to make the subject plural as well.
Actually, a lot of people would enjoy using the indefinite "it" as in, "When a student asks for its book."
nice-on-water
+0 -0
A lot of things that shouldn't be PC become PC by using "her" as a gender-neutral. I've seen this in textbooks, and not just referring to boats or countries, which are usually regarded as female.
A lot of things that shouldn't be PC become PC by using "her" as a gender-neutral. I've seen this in textbooks, and not just referring to boats or countries, which are usually regarded as female.
rowboat
+0 -0
Quote:
I kind of understand your argument, but that just reads and rolls off the tongue very uncomfortably. "His or her" is just too deeply ingrained in my mind at this point. Mark up another one for that Steinem broad.
Quote:
"When a student asks for their book,"
I kind of understand your argument, but that just reads and rolls off the tongue very uncomfortably. "His or her" is just too deeply ingrained in my mind at this point. Mark up another one for that Steinem broad.
belgand
+1 -0
Eh... I prefer third-wave feminists. They've decided that fucking is empowering and, well, that's just sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy because if that's their platform I'm going to agree with it.
Eh... I prefer third-wave feminists. They've decided that fucking is empowering and, well, that's just sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy because if that's their platform I'm going to agree with it.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -1
Given the exciting vein of grammar heresy that seems to have been unearthed, I just want to say that I don't get the point of apostrophes. We do fine without them in speech. I know the same could be said of lots of punctuation, but apostrophes just piss me off.
Given the exciting vein of grammar heresy that seems to have been unearthed, I just want to say that I don't get the point of apostrophes. We do fine without them in speech. I know the same could be said of lots of punctuation, but apostrophes just piss me off.
rowboat
+2 -0
Now that's just silly. Not only are apostrophes extremely necessary in written English, but they're a lot of fun. Also, it's hilarious to make fun of people who can't use them correctly. That's a facet of humor I wouldn't want to be without.
Now that's just silly. Not only are apostrophes extremely necessary in written English, but they're a lot of fun. Also, it's hilarious to make fun of people who can't use them correctly. That's a facet of humor I wouldn't want to be without.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
Who do you think you are, hatstand mcqarthy?
Who do you think you are, hatstand mcqarthy?
granularsilica
+0 -0
Stuff ya gotta memrize is tuff!
Stuff ya gotta memrize is tuff!
hatstand_mcq
+2 -0
Whatever dude. I've got George Bernard Shaw in my corner. You've got every disappointed internet cod-intellectual who ever gave up on their blog ("Jottings, Rants and Random Musings on Literature, Love and Cooking")after nine posts in yours.
Whatever dude. I've got George Bernard Shaw in my corner. You've got every disappointed internet cod-intellectual who ever gave up on their blog ("Jottings, Rants and Random Musings on Literature, Love and Cooking")after nine posts in yours.
gorrioncita
+0 -0
this is the only good post every fyi
this is the only good post every fyi
rowboat
+1 -0
You've got George Bernard Shaw up your ass, holmes.
You've got George Bernard Shaw up your ass, holmes.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
Hell yes. I am a grammatical conservative (like, 1944-edition-Fowler's-level conservative) in every area except this one.
Hell yes. I am a grammatical conservative (like, 1944-edition-Fowler's-level conservative) in every area except this one.
granularsilica
+0 -0
The grammar barbarians await your demise, obstructionist!
The grammar barbarians await your demise, obstructionist!
parenthetical
+9 -0
How about this catch-all alternative singular pronoun that covers "she", "it" and "he": H'or'sh'it.
How about this catch-all alternative singular pronoun that covers "she", "it" and "he": H'or'sh'it.
mawk
+0 -0
yes. none of this "tir" or "xir" bs. I appreciate the thought, all providing the english language with a short and sweet gender-neutral pronoun which is very conspicuously absent, but they could try to come up with something that doesn't sound like it came from circa-1940s science fiction.
yes. none of this "tir" or "xir" bs. I appreciate the thought, all providing the english language with a short and sweet gender-neutral pronoun which is very conspicuously absent, but they could try to come up with something that doesn't sound like it came from circa-1940s science fiction.
stereo
+0 -0
E doesn't exactly roll off the tongue either. The student crapped in eir notebook and then turned it in to the teacher.
E doesn't exactly roll off the tongue either. The student crapped in eir notebook and then turned it in to the teacher.
r1pp3r
+0 -0
1 for fucking righteousness
1 for fucking righteousness
stonecrab
+0 -0
I take the same stance, but only for about....about an hour...
(I wasn't gonna do it).
(I had to do it).
I take the same stance, but only for about....about an hour...
(I wasn't gonna do it).
(I had to do it).
urbanoutlaw
+1 -0
Yes, very tidy.
A little too tidy, in fact.
Yes, very tidy.
A little too tidy, in fact.
lynnym
+1 -0
you noticed it too?
you noticed it too?
mockereo
+0 -0
...but is it still being paranoid if you just know you're right?
...but is it still being paranoid if you just know you're right?
urbanoutlaw
+0 -0
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not really out to get you.
mockereo
+0 -0
oh oops you goofed a bit there dog. the cliche command uses square brackets in BBcode.
oh oops you goofed a bit there dog. the cliche command uses square brackets in BBcode.
urbanoutlaw
+0 -0
My bad, just can't let go of those heady days of HTML.
My bad, just can't let go of those heady days of HTML.
incompleteunit
+1 -0
"The conditions of our egress from the nest necessarily color and inform our future perversions and rage."
Yes
"The conditions of our egress from the nest necessarily color and inform our future perversions and rage."
Yes
dacapn
+0 -0
your mama
your mama
ratacattt
+0 -1
quote from the previous strip: Quote:
okay, well, you might have a point... HOWEVER... I've elicited such imbecilic behavior from you that now people are starting to think you're me. So shove that in your vagina.
quote from the previous strip: Quote:
dacapn » con 5 hours ago
no, i win. simply because i LIKE the raiders. and you, obviously, cannot like anything as you are a hate mongering, idiotic shit-stirrer, who's logic isnt even sound; because why would i change my avatar, i like it and dont want to, so i WIN.
ps, you're a douche.
no, i win. simply because i LIKE the raiders. and you, obviously, cannot like anything as you are a hate mongering, idiotic shit-stirrer, who's logic isnt even sound; because why would i change my avatar, i like it and dont want to, so i WIN.
ps, you're a douche.
okay, well, you might have a point... HOWEVER... I've elicited such imbecilic behavior from you that now people are starting to think you're me. So shove that in your vagina.
nice-on-water
+2 -0
Bringing the fight to a new strip. New lows every day at Assetbar.
Bringing the fight to a new strip. New lows every day at Assetbar.
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
you cannot get me to change my avicoc. I love the raiders and will NOT supsitute my beliefs for YOU .
i win again
you cannot get me to change my avicoc. I love the raiders and will NOT supsitute my beliefs for YOU .
i win again
gladi8orrex
+1 -0
God, your words reek of the typical right-wing idiot who would support the raiders.
done with this convo
God, your words reek of the typical right-wing idiot who would support the raiders.
done with this convo
gladi8orrex
+8 -0
sry. wrong accounts
sry. wrong accounts
ratacattt
+0 -0
assetbar is so confusing for me, more and more each day
assetbar is so confusing for me, more and more each day
i_love_kate
+0 -0
I choose to believe that this is a hoax.
I choose to believe that this is a hoax.
antimony
+1 -0
Today is the day I join assetbar so I can respond to gladi's posts. Finally.
Today is the day I join assetbar so I can respond to gladi's posts. Finally.
thegoodwillgirl
+1 -0
FINALLY.
FINALLY.
mawk
+2 -0
"I am losing ground here so I will switch tactics and pretend I was stringing you along as part of a masterful scheme to make you look silly."
"I am losing ground here so I will switch tactics and pretend I was stringing you along as part of a masterful scheme to make you look silly."
dacapn
+0 -0
so imbecilic behavior is leading fair denizens of assetbar to think i am you?? i shall cease to sink to thine fathoms from now on.......
douche
so imbecilic behavior is leading fair denizens of assetbar to think i am you?? i shall cease to sink to thine fathoms from now on.......
douche
mensch
+0 -0
Quote:
I think you mean "depths."
fath·om
%u2013noun 1. a unit of length equal to six feet (1.8 meters): used chiefly in nautical measurements.
%u2013verb (used with object) 2.to measure the depth of by means of a sounding line; sound.
3. to penetrate to the truth of; comprehend; understand: to fathom someone's motives.
Quote:
i shall cease to sink to thine fathoms . . .
I think you mean "depths."
fath·om
%u2013noun 1. a unit of length equal to six feet (1.8 meters): used chiefly in nautical measurements.
%u2013verb (used with object) 2.to measure the depth of by means of a sounding line; sound.
3. to penetrate to the truth of; comprehend; understand: to fathom someone's motives.
rowboat
+3 -0
bbcode:
1. A markup language which doesn't care much for cut-and-pasters.
2. The car of pain in which you've just taken to school.
bbcode:
1. A markup language which doesn't care much for cut-and-pasters.
2. The car of pain in which you've just taken to school.
dacapn
+0 -0
fathoms meaning multiple, meaning depth, meaning you are a FUCKING TARD
fathoms meaning multiple, meaning depth, meaning you are a FUCKING TARD
mawk
+0 -0
hey now, easy. you've already lost cool points for using "thine" in a sentence like that; careful with the rest!
hey now, easy. you've already lost cool points for using "thine" in a sentence like that; careful with the rest!
ratacattt
+0 -0
holy shit it is AIU... can that be? The second coming? Attack of the AIU clones? An AIU sent from the future to destroy me, only far more advanced??... this one actually has some social acumen?
holy shit it is AIU... can that be? The second coming? Attack of the AIU clones? An AIU sent from the future to destroy me, only far more advanced??... this one actually has some social acumen?
mawk
+1 -0
these things you do where you call out a potential troll are always marred a little by the way you interpret them all as potential attacks on yourself. brotip: on the internet, you are not that important. no one is. it is fun to believe that you might have some pathologically devoted straw detractor to validate whatever it is you do, but these people are actually pretty rare!
and most of the ones that do exist are busy commenting on Youtube, anyway.
these things you do where you call out a potential troll are always marred a little by the way you interpret them all as potential attacks on yourself. brotip: on the internet, you are not that important. no one is. it is fun to believe that you might have some pathologically devoted straw detractor to validate whatever it is you do, but these people are actually pretty rare!
and most of the ones that do exist are busy commenting on Youtube, anyway.
ratacattt
+0 -0
I've called out trolls before? I don't remember that.
anyway. you have to admit that this guy is today at least the closest anyone here has come to being like me.
I've called out trolls before? I don't remember that.
anyway. you have to admit that this guy is today at least the closest anyone here has come to being like me.
dacapn
+0 -0
d.i.e.d.i.e.d.i.e. kidding. youve called out what YOU thought were trolls, such as innocent Raiders fans, hence becoming a troll your... self...
d.i.e.d.i.e.d.i.e. kidding. youve called out what YOU thought were trolls, such as innocent Raiders fans, hence becoming a troll your... self...
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
oh sure. anybody who disagrees with you is a 'troll'
oh sure. anybody who disagrees with you is a 'troll'
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
innocent Raiders fans
NONSENSE! PECK!
...as the chickens gather cautiously around the strange, new bird...
innocent Raiders fans
NONSENSE! PECK!
...as the chickens gather cautiously around the strange, new bird...
mawk
+0 -0
what does "like you" mean, anyway? your behaviour isn't, like, super-distinctive.
what does "like you" mean, anyway? your behaviour isn't, like, super-distinctive.
squidvicious
+1 -0
SHUT UP! Shut up, both of you! God, I've never wanted to read assetbar less in my life!
SHUT UP! Shut up, both of you! God, I've never wanted to read assetbar less in my life!
rowboat
+1 -0
[IMGS OFF]
You'd want to read it even less if you could see that.
[IMGS OFF]
You'd want to read it even less if you could see that.
r1pp3r
+0 -0
Aaaah, you two are *soo* in love. When's the marriage?
Aaaah, you two are *soo* in love. When's the marriage?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Also; 'whose'
lol
Also; 'whose'
lol
urbanoutlaw
+0 -0
Precisely.
Precisely.
puguglypress
+0 -0
A punchline! Omg!
A punchline! Omg!
granularsilica
+0 -0
I can do without Corny. An 'iserical aunt, my foot.
I can do without Corny. An 'iserical aunt, my foot.
mercuri0us
+1 -0
It's actually correct to say "an" before a word beginning with "h" without cutting out the "h" sound. It's old fashioned, but correct. They do it on the news sometimes in my country.
It's actually correct to say "an" before a word beginning with "h" without cutting out the "h" sound. It's old fashioned, but correct. They do it on the news sometimes in my country.
mr-siegal
+1 -0
Chubby in recognition of another grammar nazi.
"So rare are proper enthusiasts of unpopular British grammar these days that upon meeting a kinsman, one must immediately accept his card," or "rap them soundly with a" first edition Oxford Concise.
We then repair to an homely nearby hostelry, and enjoy an ham sandwich and an half-pint of British bitter.
Chubby in recognition of another grammar nazi.
"So rare are proper enthusiasts of unpopular British grammar these days that upon meeting a kinsman, one must immediately accept his card," or "rap them soundly with a" first edition Oxford Concise.
We then repair to an homely nearby hostelry, and enjoy an ham sandwich and an half-pint of British bitter.
thegoblins
+1 -0
/oral sex
/oral sex
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I was raised on "a historical"; when I see "an historical" here in the UK I want to scream.
I was raised on "a historical"; when I see "an historical" here in the UK I want to scream.
hamscout
+1 -0
You'd best take time to centre yourself. Your face is turning an odd colour from the labour of the scream.
You'd best take time to centre yourself. Your face is turning an odd colour from the labour of the scream.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Those don't bother me. Just "an h-"s.
Those don't bother me. Just "an h-"s.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Oh but also "plough" bothers me. I want to say "plawf" every time.
This is what happens when I start posting more.
Oh but also "plough" bothers me. I want to say "plawf" every time.
This is what happens when I start posting more.
mockereo
+0 -0
although, you still know how to say dough. fo' shough!
although, you still know how to say dough. fo' shough!
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Yeah, but it's different in my brain. I don't know maaan.
Yeah, but it's different in my brain. I don't know maaan.
belgand
+0 -0
I don't have a problem with "plough" at all. It seems more or less normal to me. What I can't deal with, and you see this in the US as well, is "draught".
I don't have a problem with "plough" at all. It seems more or less normal to me. What I can't deal with, and you see this in the US as well, is "draught".
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
I'll never stop finding it funny to pronounce Slough (the town) as 'sluff'. Never.
I'll never stop finding it funny to pronounce Slough (the town) as 'sluff'. Never.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Surely better than slaaaoow.
Surely better than slaaaoow.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Draft? Never knew draft and draught were the same till like two years ago. Blew my mind.
Draft? Never knew draft and draught were the same till like two years ago. Blew my mind.
rowboat
+0 -0
I learned that pretty late, too, and I'm still grappling with it.
I learned that pretty late, too, and I'm still grappling with it.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Starting with "cough," put the gutteral "gh" way back in your throat and see what a vivid language it used to be. None of this pansy "fff" stuff, but real, manly gargling. It is to lauuuughgh ... ack .. ptew!
Starting with "cough," put the gutteral "gh" way back in your throat and see what a vivid language it used to be. None of this pansy "fff" stuff, but real, manly gargling. It is to lauuuughgh ... ack .. ptew!
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Do NOT call the F sound pansy. It's one of the most forceful beginning consonants ever. FFFFFFFFFUCK. It's potent; you can draw it out a lot more than most.
Do NOT call the F sound pansy. It's one of the most forceful beginning consonants ever. FFFFFFFFFUCK. It's potent; you can draw it out a lot more than most.
amoulsolo
+0 -0
I find I must disagree. Surely the opening 'c' of 'cunt' delivers a much more immediate impact than the drawn out 'f' in your example. While the ending is not as strong as in 'fuck', a very quiet testing in my cube here at work suggests that when combined, they pack a perfectly pleasing punch.
I find I must disagree. Surely the opening 'c' of 'cunt' delivers a much more immediate impact than the drawn out 'f' in your example. While the ending is not as strong as in 'fuck', a very quiet testing in my cube here at work suggests that when combined, they pack a perfectly pleasing punch.
thegoodwillgirl
+2 -0
... so you're just sitting in a cubicle saying "cunt"? Amen to THAT.
... so you're just sitting in a cubicle saying "cunt"? Amen to THAT.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Fuckcunt? I quite like that. Or cuntfuck. Nice.
No, no, but what I'm saying is on the whole, F is dynamic enough that you can either draw it out or make it nice and sharp: Ffffffffuck or F uck! I'm a fan.
Fuckcunt? I quite like that. Or cuntfuck. Nice.
No, no, but what I'm saying is on the whole, F is dynamic enough that you can either draw it out or make it nice and sharp: Ffffffffuck or F uck! I'm a fan.
smallblackdog
+0 -0
'Cunthooks' is good
'Cunthooks' is good
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Most sonically pleasing curse combos, anyone?
Most sonically pleasing curse combos, anyone?
granularsilica
+1 -0
I had a college buddy from Ukraine, and in learning how to talk dirty in English, he would put together three-word combos -- maybe it's a Ukrainian thing. The one I still recall is (say it with Slavic accent):
PRICKSHITDOUCHE
I had a college buddy from Ukraine, and in learning how to talk dirty in English, he would put together three-word combos -- maybe it's a Ukrainian thing. The one I still recall is (say it with Slavic accent):
PRICKSHITDOUCHE
r1pp3r
+0 -0
See Malcolm Tucker: "Fuckity Bye"
See Malcolm Tucker: "Fuckity Bye"
r1pp3r
+0 -0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LugJd6uGJqI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LugJd6uGJqI
i_love_kate
+0 -0
No it is not.
No it is not.
r1pp3r
+0 -0
"Plough" rhymes with "Slough". You're welcome.
"Plough" rhymes with "Slough". You're welcome.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Right, like no one figured that out yet. >B|
Right, like no one figured that out yet. >B|
mr-siegal
+0 -0
Medically, it's 'sloff'.
Medically, it's 'sloff'.
smallblackdog
+0 -0
no one can hear you scream in space
no one can hear you scream in space
nice-on-water
+1 -0
They must have an hearing problem.
They must have an hearing problem.
mattylite
+1 -0
no one can give you an handjob in spacesuit
no one can give you an handjob in spacesuit
nice-on-water
+0 -0
John Glenn is a perennially displeased man.
John Glenn is a perennially displeased man.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
"I want to go back, NASA, and this time I want to do it RIGHT."
-Later-
"DAMNIT!"
"I want to go back, NASA, and this time I want to do it RIGHT."
-Later-
"DAMNIT!"
smallblackdog
+0 -0
you could give yourself a handjob in a spacesuit if you kept your arms by your sides when they zipped you up.
you could give yourself a handjob in a spacesuit if you kept your arms by your sides when they zipped you up.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I think with this we can pretty much put the kibosh on problem-solving as a species, since we'll never need any more ever.
I think with this we can pretty much put the kibosh on problem-solving as a species, since we'll never need any more ever.
mattylite
+3 -0
Houston, we have liftoff.
Houston, we have liftoff.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Well, Nice, it's really quite simple. "A" comes before vowel sounds (a,e,i,o,u) and "an" before consonants, right? "H" is a consonant .... IF YOU PRONOUNCE IT. IF you don't, it leaves the vowel "i" exposed, and we get an 'istorical event.
Well, Nice, it's really quite simple. "A" comes before vowel sounds (a,e,i,o,u) and "an" before consonants, right? "H" is a consonant .... IF YOU PRONOUNCE IT. IF you don't, it leaves the vowel "i" exposed, and we get an 'istorical event.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Yeah but it's in print, and Scots pronounce Hs. I don't live in an East End community comprised totally of Dick van Dykes.
Yeah but it's in print, and Scots pronounce Hs. I don't live in an East End community comprised totally of Dick van Dykes.
granularsilica
+1 -0
And don't ever be a dick to a dyke!
And don't ever be a dick to a dyke!
nice-on-water
+0 -0
In a van?
In a van?
smallblackdog
+1 -0
The moral is - don't expose your vowels.
The moral is - don't expose your vowels.
r1pp3r
+0 -0
Dicks go into Dykes, as every good Dutchy knows.
Dicks go into Dykes, as every good Dutchy knows.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
An hysterical predicament.
An hysterical predicament.
carlyle
+0 -0
Nice neat, and everything back to normal.
Nice neat, and everything back to normal.
thebigmike1983
+1 -0
Here comes back a special boy!
Here comes back a special boy!
neonfreon
+1 -0
when i was a kid, i never could make as many as bubbles as my dad could, but now i can cover the surface toilet bowl water easily. i am reminded of this on a regular basis, often after a sentiment inspiring beer; it's one way i deal with losing childhood.
when i was a kid, i never could make as many as bubbles as my dad could, but now i can cover the surface toilet bowl water easily. i am reminded of this on a regular basis, often after a sentiment inspiring beer; it's one way i deal with losing childhood.
stereo
+0 -0
I used to wonder about that. I could get the bubbles round the edge, but never that full toilet bowl of foam.
I bet it's semen or something.
I used to wonder about that. I could get the bubbles round the edge, but never that full toilet bowl of foam.
I bet it's semen or something.
nice-on-water
+6 -0
Semen! THAT'S the secret to piss bubbles! GOD is that obvious!
Semen! THAT'S the secret to piss bubbles! GOD is that obvious!
granularsilica
+0 -0
Or some other bodily excretion, like from too much of some chemical or something.
Or some other bodily excretion, like from too much of some chemical or something.
jeffspaulding
+2 -0
We could try different configurations to see what works best.
Call it a piss off.
We could try different configurations to see what works best.
Call it a piss off.
notdavidbowie
+0 -0
Piss off?
Piss off?
smilebuddha
+0 -1
All right, I'm leaving. You didn't have to be mean about it.
( slams door )
All right, I'm leaving. You didn't have to be mean about it.
( slams door )
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Cpnglxynchos didn't get the joke I made. And after all the things I thought about doing for him, but never got around to doing. (sigh) Really.
Cpnglxynchos didn't get the joke I made. And after all the things I thought about doing for him, but never got around to doing. (sigh) Really.
gladi8orrex
+1 -0
it has to do wit velocity (older, stronger dick muscle, so on 'n so forth) 'n also body mass.
body mass?
yes. body mass. u's cn store mor toxins n a larger vessel den normal. part o teh foam is jus waste. kids cant store as much waste to despose of as a larger unit (i.e. adult)
my shows got wings
it has to do wit velocity (older, stronger dick muscle, so on 'n so forth) 'n also body mass.
body mass?
yes. body mass. u's cn store mor toxins n a larger vessel den normal. part o teh foam is jus waste. kids cant store as much waste to despose of as a larger unit (i.e. adult)
my shows got wings
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
I support this assessment, with the added consideration that with greater height comes greater piss velocity. We could test this by getting hold of a child to tutor in the ways of righteousness, procure some of its uncontaminated urine and fire it through a super soaker at a lavatory bowl.
I support this assessment, with the added consideration that with greater height comes greater piss velocity. We could test this by getting hold of a child to tutor in the ways of righteousness, procure some of its uncontaminated urine and fire it through a super soaker at a lavatory bowl.
rowboat
+2 -0
No. With great piss velocity comes great responsibility.
No. With great piss velocity comes great responsibility.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Great Piss Velocity would make a good name for a band.
Great Piss Velocity would make a good name for a band.
stereo
+0 -0
Alternatively, we could elevate the child.
Or have them piss into a decanter, then fire an identical quantity of both samples through super soakers calibrated carefully to produce the same stream.
The film rights alone could make millions.
Alternatively, we could elevate the child.
Or have them piss into a decanter, then fire an identical quantity of both samples through super soakers calibrated carefully to produce the same stream.
The film rights alone could make millions.
theirateturk
+2 -0
what achewood needs is a character based on me
onstad - call me, bruheim
what achewood needs is a character based on me
onstad - call me, bruheim
gladi8orrex
+23 -0
Panel 1:
Picturee of ratertuck n woaman
Iratetruck: "oi, darlin', i'ma jus' step out 'n get sum nuts or w/e :\." thought bubble *man. why am i such a twat with snacks...*
woman: okay babe. ima jus' be like molly in this panel
panel 2:
irate turckruckus leaving, farewell smooches.
panel 3:
black with white text saying:
20 seconds later
panel 4:
iraterucks hand entering home again. did he forget something?
Iraterack: "sorry hun, forgot my--"
--QUICK. PANEL 5:
4 to 10 football players stuffing erections in the woman.
ir8turk: h-holy shit!!! not again!
that's how ur first comic't'd go, pro
Panel 1:
Picturee of ratertuck n woaman
Iratetruck: "oi, darlin', i'ma jus' step out 'n get sum nuts or w/e :\." thought bubble *man. why am i such a twat with snacks...*
woman: okay babe. ima jus' be like molly in this panel
panel 2:
irate turckruckus leaving, farewell smooches.
panel 3:
black with white text saying:
20 seconds later
panel 4:
iraterucks hand entering home again. did he forget something?
Iraterack: "sorry hun, forgot my--"
--QUICK. PANEL 5:
4 to 10 football players stuffing erections in the woman.
ir8turk: h-holy shit!!! not again!
that's how ur first comic't'd go, pro
fineoakstructure
+2 -0
panel 6:
theirateturk punches each football player on the erection, and a promise is belatedly upheld.
panel 6:
theirateturk punches each football player on the erection, and a promise is belatedly upheld.
philophobe
+0 -0
4 to 10 football player erections is completely the perfect number.
4 to 10 football player erections is completely the perfect number.
thinman
+3 -0
It's a cute amount of a erections, for a cute little guy.
It's a cute amount of a erections, for a cute little guy.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
No.
No.
wonelove
+0 -0
Where's the alt text?
Where's the alt text?
misteralways
+8 -0
"Like clockwork, this will always happen on his birthday."
"Like clockwork, this will always happen on his birthday."
dacapn
+0 -0
they're the 2010 draft class for ...... Kansas City
they're the 2010 draft class for ...... Kansas City
theirateturk
+0 -0
I hope you appreciate all I do for you, dostum
I hope you appreciate all I do for you, dostum
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Did you just bring the sass in Turkish?
Did you just bring the sass in Turkish?
cpnglxynchos
+4 -0
That's nobody's business but the Turk's.
That's nobody's business but the Turk's.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
La Commercio del Turco , an opera in 3 Acts, starring theirateturk, gladi9orecks, some alleged girl, a football team, and your mom .
La Commercio del Turco , an opera in 3 Acts, starring theirateturk, gladi9orecks, some alleged girl, a football team, and your mom .
dusty
+0 -0
Which famous webcomic do you write? Now that I have realized what the question is I must have the answer!
Which famous webcomic do you write? Now that I have realized what the question is I must have the answer!
nice-on-water
+0 -0
The last two panels seem totally unAchewood; usually we have something like Beef in the middle of a glassy-eyed rant, or Ray slapping a burger out of Lyle's hands, or Philippe shuddering in a dark corner. Just as Connie says, it's tidy, no? Fitting. I like it. Art imitates art etc.
The last two panels seem totally unAchewood; usually we have something like Beef in the middle of a glassy-eyed rant, or Ray slapping a burger out of Lyle's hands, or Philippe shuddering in a dark corner. Just as Connie says, it's tidy, no? Fitting. I like it. Art imitates art etc.
thegoblins
+0 -0
I wish there was more visual sexiness in this strip. As you were.
I wish there was more visual sexiness in this strip. As you were.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
You can go elsewhere for your visual sexiness. Might I recommend my weekly webcam show? Free if you can answer an entry-level question about Monty Python, but you have to bring your own iguana and Victorian diving apparatus.
oh god freddie you don't know where you're going with this comment kill it just kill it now
You can go elsewhere for your visual sexiness. Might I recommend my weekly webcam show? Free if you can answer an entry-level question about Monty Python, but you have to bring your own iguana and Victorian diving apparatus.
oh god freddie you don't know where you're going with this comment kill it just kill it now
hamscout
+0 -0
...what...Is that a chicken up there? Oh--no, it's just the way she's holding the grapefruit.
...what...Is that a chicken up there? Oh--no, it's just the way she's holding the grapefruit.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Taco's dangling legs befuddle me.
Taco's dangling legs befuddle me.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
They are oddly conspicuous in this strip, aren't they?
They are oddly conspicuous in this strip, aren't they?
nice-on-water
+0 -0
They are!
They are!
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
It is a comic device implying an unresolved issue in his mind. He is vaguely befuddled, therefore you are also.
Picasso, Leonardo, Ricky Henderson- all the greats used it.
It is a comic device implying an unresolved issue in his mind. He is vaguely befuddled, therefore you are also.
Picasso, Leonardo, Ricky Henderson- all the greats used it.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Don't talk smack about Ricky.
Don't talk smack about Ricky.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
No way. Ricky's all crazy-legs, catcher don't know if he's coming or going, cut across the mound and goose the pitcher, all stoned-barbeque slow-pitch "Yo, I gotcha 3rd base right here!"
No way. Ricky's all crazy-legs, catcher don't know if he's coming or going, cut across the mound and goose the pitcher, all stoned-barbeque slow-pitch "Yo, I gotcha 3rd base right here!"
rowboat
+1 -0
Also cocaine.
Also cocaine.
misteralways
+0 -0
So what's the deal with Connie's "ont"? Does she want to do such as come and see him? I am confused.
So what's the deal with Connie's "ont"? Does she want to do such as come and see him? I am confused.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
T's pause: he goes home to solve his own Childhood.
Damn, I'm a genius.
T's pause: he goes home to solve his own Childhood.
Damn, I'm a genius.
thinman
+0 -0
Steve DeNeuve may not have sought refuge in bourbon or shell games, but I'll wager he DID seek it in 'Svenhard's'(and by 'Svenhard's' I mean the sexual position, not the danish) and vintage child pornography.
I'm STILL watching you, DeNeuve. **point at my eyes with my left index and middle finger, then point those same fingers in Steve's direction**
Steve DeNeuve may not have sought refuge in bourbon or shell games, but I'll wager he DID seek it in 'Svenhard's'(and by 'Svenhard's' I mean the sexual position, not the danish) and vintage child pornography.
I'm STILL watching you, DeNeuve. **point at my eyes with my left index and middle finger, then point those same fingers in Steve's direction**
mensch
+0 -0
I rationalize my obsession with vintage child porn by noting that they are all in their 90's now (this doesn't work with JonBenét Ramsey).
I rationalize my obsession with vintage child porn by noting that they are all in their 90's now (this doesn't work with JonBenét Ramsey).
ratacattt
+0 -0
who gives a fuck she's dead. You could dig up her grave and fuck her skull it still wouldn't be child molestation.
who gives a fuck she's dead. You could dig up her grave and fuck her skull it still wouldn't be child molestation.
belgand
+0 -0
Nah, they'd find a way. People hate it when you do something that isn't technically illegal, but they want to believe that it is and that you shouldn't be doing it.
I recall there was an issue a few years ago with some necrophilia and everyone was upset that it wasn't technically illegal so they charged them with desecration of a corpse, trespassing, everything they could think of until they could ram a bill against it through. California passed a law against it in 2004 because prosecutors complained about how hard it was to prosecute someone for it when it wasn't actually illegal.
Nah, they'd find a way. People hate it when you do something that isn't technically illegal, but they want to believe that it is and that you shouldn't be doing it.
I recall there was an issue a few years ago with some necrophilia and everyone was upset that it wasn't technically illegal so they charged them with desecration of a corpse, trespassing, everything they could think of until they could ram a bill against it through. California passed a law against it in 2004 because prosecutors complained about how hard it was to prosecute someone for it when it wasn't actually illegal.
mawk
+0 -0
man I keep wanting to prosecute people for wearing sunglasses on the back of their head but turns out that isn't actually illegal either. I think we gotta make a trip to California.
man I keep wanting to prosecute people for wearing sunglasses on the back of their head but turns out that isn't actually illegal either. I think we gotta make a trip to California.
cproseedcakeksc
+0 -0
Top Achewood writing here. I am breathless with admiration.
Top Achewood writing here. I am breathless with admiration.
puguglypress
+0 -0
"Tidy, no?" is the best two-word piece of writing since "Jesus wept".
"Tidy, no?" is the best two-word piece of writing since "Jesus wept".
desert_donkey
+0 -0
Quote:
i can not overlook that.
Quote:
...an hysterical...
i can not overlook that.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
WAIT!
who hear slurps when they drink? i am guessing most/all of you. not me.
WAIT!
who hear slurps when they drink? i am guessing most/all of you. not me.
neonfreon
+0 -0
if a bear drinks in the woods and nobody is there to hear it..
if a bear drinks in the woods and nobody is there to hear it..
dacapn
+0 -0
rowboat pees in a cup
rowboat pees in a cup
desert_donkey
+0 -0
i feel bad for me. i meant to say "here".. but it totally worked.
ftr; i am drinking a beer (not a bear and not in the woods) and there is ZERO "sip", audible or otherwise.
CHEERS FUKKUZ!
i feel bad for me. i meant to say "here".. but it totally worked.
ftr; i am drinking a beer (not a bear and not in the woods) and there is ZERO "sip", audible or otherwise.
CHEERS FUKKUZ!
neonfreon
+0 -0
i honestly thought you meant "who hears slurps when they drink".
i honestly thought you meant "who hears slurps when they drink".
rowboat
+0 -0
On a normal day, I'd somehow twist your comment around in such a way as to suggest that you had at some point performed oral sex on me and maybe imply that you still do regularly.
But I'm a tired man. Sometimes I think I'm the tiredest man on Earth. You may go.
On a normal day, I'd somehow twist your comment around in such a way as to suggest that you had at some point performed oral sex on me and maybe imply that you still do regularly.
But I'm a tired man. Sometimes I think I'm the tiredest man on Earth. You may go.
thinman
+0 -0
Tired from all fellatio you've been giving me and will continue to give me in the future?
(Did I do that right? I think I did it right. GOD GAWD, I HOPE I DID THAT RIGHT!!!)
Tired from all fellatio you've been giving me and will continue to give me in the future?
(Did I do that right? I think I did it right. GOD GAWD, I HOPE I DID THAT RIGHT!!!)
mawk
+0 -0
eh, it was passable. I'm still disappointed with the blowjob you gave me last night, though. do better next time.
eh, it was passable. I'm still disappointed with the blowjob you gave me last night, though. do better next time.
mockereo
+0 -0
fellatio is my favourite word for my favourite thing to get.
fellatio is my favourite word for my favourite thing to get.
dacapn
+1 -1
die for favourite. just die. maybe go stand in the centre of the room drinking grey tea while doing it, on pointe, just dieeeeee
die for favourite. just die. maybe go stand in the centre of the room drinking grey tea while doing it, on pointe, just dieeeeee
shelbydavis
+0 -0
That sort of attitude will get a you kicked to the kerb around here.
That sort of attitude will get a you kicked to the kerb around here.
belgand
+1 -0
Fuck you. People who spell it "gray" are subhuman.
Fuck you. People who spell it "gray" are subhuman.
dacapn
+1 -0
fuck you, look at they english language. by the vowel rule "grey" is GREE and "gray" is GRAE pronounced because the second vowel is silenttttt moronnnnn
fuck you, look at they english language. by the vowel rule "grey" is GREE and "gray" is GRAE pronounced because the second vowel is silenttttt moronnnnn
plummet
+0 -0
Okay, now tell us how you REALLY feel about it.
Okay, now tell us how you REALLY feel about it.
r1pp3r
+0 -0
If you want a logical language, speak Turkish; not the mish-mash you call American English.
If you want a logical language, speak Turkish; not the mish-mash you call American English.
shelbydavis
+0 -0
I know what you mean. Dorian Gray was never quite perfect for me because I believed the titular character could never be truly sophisticated so long as he spelled his name that way.
I know what you mean. Dorian Gray was never quite perfect for me because I believed the titular character could never be truly sophisticated so long as he spelled his name that way.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
Quote:
[IMGS OFF]
Quote:
...titular...
[IMGS OFF]
desert_donkey
+0 -0
huh... well just imagine a good pic of Beavis & Butthead.
huh... well just imagine a good pic of Beavis & Butthead.
mawk
+0 -0
no such thing.
no such thing.
granularsilica
+0 -0
If they were impaled on stakes, that would be a sight.
If they were impaled on stakes, that would be a sight.
neonfreon
+0 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
mockereo
+0 -0
did not disappoint
did not disappoint
desert_donkey
+0 -0
when i found out how "bukkakke" is pronounced, i laughed for hours.
when i found out what it meant, i puked for hours. for hours.
when i found out how "bukkakke" is pronounced, i laughed for hours.
when i found out what it meant, i puked for hours. for hours.
ratacattt
+0 -0
that's actually a porn genre too, you know...
that's actually a porn genre too, you know...
cryztal
+0 -0
Well dang is their anything that old bear doesn't have figured out?
Well dang is their anything that old bear doesn't have figured out?
dybrar
+0 -0
That dang old bear has completely figured out everything. He is the master of out-figurey.
That dang old bear has completely figured out everything. He is the master of out-figurey.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
figure-outry, even.
figure-outry, even.
doppelganger
+1 -0
finger-entry, oddly.
finger-entry, oddly.
mensch
+0 -0
[ insert Roethlisberger joke here ]
[ insert Roethlisberger joke here ]
dacapn
+4 -0
insert idiotic mensch joke here. surprised you didnt just do the usual. you for real might as well just make the quote box say "something stupid by a fat virgin" no one cares. eat one.
insert idiotic mensch joke here. surprised you didnt just do the usual. you for real might as well just make the quote box say "something stupid by a fat virgin" no one cares. eat one.
stereo
+0 -0
Schizophrenic trolls get annoyed by their own comments?
Schizophrenic trolls get annoyed by their own comments?
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
i've lost track of all my proxies.
i've lost track of all my proxies.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
Quote:
Big Ben would totally slip it in if he were here. And drunk. And you were some doe-eyed drunk bitch.
Quote:
{insert Roethlisberger joke here}
Big Ben would totally slip it in if he were here. And drunk. And you were some doe-eyed drunk bitch.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
SHIT! INSERT IT. fuck. i hate myself.
SHIT! INSERT IT. fuck. i hate myself.
granularsilica
+3 -0
That's definitely what she said.
That's definitely what she said.
gorrioncita
+0 -0
creepy dude says dumb thing
creepy dude says dumb thing
neonfreon
+0 -0
in achewood, we say 'creepiest dude says dumbest thing'
in achewood, we say 'creepiest dude says dumbest thing'
fattypneumonia
+1 -0
We read creepiest dude's postinks until we are dumbest we are ever beink.
Until we are SO dumb.
SO dumb.
puf
We read creepiest dude's postinks until we are dumbest we are ever beink.
Until we are SO dumb.
SO dumb.
puf
kingcrimson
+0 -0
I thought the ending was kind of disappointing but all in all I really enjoyed this arc. It had some great moments, both funny and serious.
I thought the ending was kind of disappointing but all in all I really enjoyed this arc. It had some great moments, both funny and serious.
sidemeat
+0 -0
no anger at anyone in particular, but in a general sort of way, much as one might say 'merry christmas' to whatever schlub was in one's path at that time of year,
may i wish everyone a hearty 'fuck you' at this most festive day of the week...
no anger at anyone in particular, but in a general sort of way, much as one might say 'merry christmas' to whatever schlub was in one's path at that time of year,
may i wish everyone a hearty 'fuck you' at this most festive day of the week...
gladi8orrex
+1 -0
what is this[/br]
what is this
what is this
what is this
what is this
what is this
what is this[/br]
what is this
what is this
what is this
what is this
plummet
+0 -0
you get a chub
you get a chub
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
thx pro
thx pro
deus
+0 -0
no first posts for me...i saw the comic early but discuss wasnt there....:#:#:#:#
no first posts for me...i saw the comic early but discuss wasnt there....:#:#:#:#
granularsilica
+0 -0
This one's been up for three days -- wait, you came home drunk again, didn't you?
This one's been up for three days -- wait, you came home drunk again, didn't you?
deus
+0 -0
might have....
might have....
troy_convers
+0 -0
From Bathel to Denver huh?
A leper's day out...
From Bathel to Denver huh?
A leper's day out...
jjadgemini88
+0 -0
I'm reading these new ones after having read vol 1 and 2 of the earlier stuff....its like walking onto another planet. its longer, weirder, deeper...i almost miss the simple stuff.
I'm reading these new ones after having read vol 1 and 2 of the earlier stuff....its like walking onto another planet. its longer, weirder, deeper...i almost miss the simple stuff.
a386
+0 -0
it's touches like "an hysterical" that make this strip shine. onstadt realizes he's not transcribing an accent phonetically, necessarily, but rather writing in a style which calls to mind the feeling of the accent. cornelius may not literally PRONOUNCE the "n," but he'd sure as hell write it, and he probably thinks it.
it's touches like "an hysterical" that make this strip shine. onstadt realizes he's not transcribing an accent phonetically, necessarily, but rather writing in a style which calls to mind the feeling of the accent. cornelius may not literally PRONOUNCE the "n," but he'd sure as hell write it, and he probably thinks it.
terribleman
+0 -0
Someone gave a fuck at the workplace today.
Someone gave a fuck at the workplace today.
So rare are proper enthusiasts of unpopular British lawn games these days that upon meeting a kinsman, one must immediately accept his card.
I keep such cards in my PoDex.
The young lass playing podex in this picture https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/05/Podex2.jpg appears quite comely, though 'tis difficult to tell from the rear.
I this picture, however, they look like "Rabers" or those ghastly folk who go to that heathen "Burning Man" festival.
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/64/Podex1.jpg/800px-Podex1.jpg
what is going on with the girl in the left-centre foreground. She's got a hat that simultaneously stores a spoon, carries a thermos of soup, and screams that she will not be getting laid.
Das Racist - "Rainbow in the Dark"
fuck that one. it's a pirated copy. this one the good one
I feel like if she could get laid anywhere, it might be at Burning Man.
And she would get laid everywhere there.
I'd bowl one at her upright stumps anyday.
I'd give her one right in the puddocks.
Comely in the rear, specifically . I'd give her quite a sticky wicket.
Bonus chub for the literal/figurative Latin pun.
Throw her a googly, see her she handles that ball. As it is, she's not doing a very good job of silly mid-off
I want to see her wipe my seam.
Chubby for unpopularity.
I agree that the PoDex lady is hot. What I like almost more is that the fact that the article is nominated to be "checked for neutrality." Check out the discussion page. Read the comments with a British accent, it's really great.
I usually nod, place my spectacles in my breast pocket and rap them soundly with a croquet mallet. Those no rendered simple by the cranial trauma usually agree that it was a fine joke.
lexsenthur's reads, to me, as follows:
1. Nods.
2. Places his spectacles in his breast pocket.
3. Proceeds to rap said spectacles soundly with a croquet mallet.
A fine joke, indeed, sir, and a boon to opticians everywhere.
Padrig-faced Padrig raps soundly.
Oh my god, the most perfect thing to say ever! (BOOM)
Didn't Teodor find DeNeuve on Yelp?
interesting... it's possible to find someone on yelp without initially finding the person on yelp.
Or perhaps it doesn't really jive, and you're being a pedant.
chubbied for being an idiot. again. OH YES I START IT THIS ROUND WHITE DEVIL
Will you two just fuck and get it over with.
Yes, this. Do this.
you are oscar grant
Nobody is Oscar Grant. This is because he is dead.
This is Phillipe we're talking about here: Teodor isn't going to take blind advice from even a source as authoritative as Cornelius without double checking.