anomalous3
+0 -0
A comment left by anomalous3 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, erributtz, antecen, gmagnido, PoodleLucy, SenseiHollywood)
A comment left by anomalous3 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by madnes, erributtz, antecen, gmagnido, PoodleLucy, SenseiHollywood)
jollysaintpete
+0 -0
i wonder what the reasoning behind those lames was
i wonder what the reasoning behind those lames was
anomalous3
+0 -0
perhaps people here do not approve of the illicit use of legal substances?
perhaps people here do not approve of the illicit use of legal substances?
jollysaintpete
+0 -0
hah, more like, perhaps people here have never tried it
hah, more like, perhaps people here have never tried it
tasteful
+0 -0
yeah what?
yeah what?
freakywonton
+0 -1
or an extra large helping of CRACK COCAINE
or an extra large helping of CRACK COCAINE
sargasm
+15 -0
"Stuff a condom or two with light, fluffy cotton. You've just made a unique cylinder pillow and conversation piece!"
"Stuff a condom or two with light, fluffy cotton. You've just made a unique cylinder pillow and conversation piece!"
senseihollywood
+24 -0
Fill a condom with equal parts raisins, sugar (fruit cocktail will suffice in a pinch) and toilet water. Let ferment for 2-weeks. There you have it, an easy recipe for prison cell pinot, and the added convenience of a condom/decanter that is easily removed from the toilet bowl for performing life's little unpleasant necessaries...It's a good(ish) thing
Fill a condom with equal parts raisins, sugar (fruit cocktail will suffice in a pinch) and toilet water. Let ferment for 2-weeks. There you have it, an easy recipe for prison cell pinot, and the added convenience of a condom/decanter that is easily removed from the toilet bowl for performing life's little unpleasant necessaries...It's a good(ish) thing
chaesar
+30 -1
Fill with your favorite cocktail and tie to inside of pant leg, perfect for sneaking liquor into a sporting event.
Fill one quarter with water and tie off, place in freezer on its side. You will have the perfect ice stick to chill beverages in a yard glass.
Roll onto your dick, perfect for fucking a lady without fear of pregnancy or disease.
Fill with your favorite cocktail and tie to inside of pant leg, perfect for sneaking liquor into a sporting event.
Fill one quarter with water and tie off, place in freezer on its side. You will have the perfect ice stick to chill beverages in a yard glass.
Roll onto your dick, perfect for fucking a lady without fear of pregnancy or disease.
cpnglxynchos
+2 -2
one of my friends is pregnant.
she was on the pill,
he was using a condom,
and it wasn't her fertile time.
in short, this baby was going to happen 'cos God said so. or, though i think this sort of joke is lame on here, but Chuck Norris has some competition.
one of my friends is pregnant.
she was on the pill,
he was using a condom,
and it wasn't her fertile time.
in short, this baby was going to happen 'cos God said so. or, though i think this sort of joke is lame on here, but Chuck Norris has some competition.
mystkmanat
+0 -0
This was 8 months ago. Has she had it yet? How is the miracle baby doing?
[[This is a genuine question and not facetiousness]]
This was 8 months ago. Has she had it yet? How is the miracle baby doing?
[[This is a genuine question and not facetiousness]]
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Oh man, oh man, tell us!
Oh man, oh man, tell us!
phthoggos
+0 -0
A comment left by phthoggos was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by dimenur, anticitizen, nutmeg)
A comment left by phthoggos was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by dimenur, anticitizen, nutmeg)
zedpower
+8 -0
He just says that because he ran out of ideas and doesn't want to admit it straight to Beef's face. Happens to me all the time.
He just says that because he ran out of ideas and doesn't want to admit it straight to Beef's face. Happens to me all the time.
phthoggos
+0 -0
A comment left by phthoggos was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by littlecat, Crater12, nutmeg)
A comment left by phthoggos was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by littlecat, Crater12, nutmeg)
killingthejay
+3 -0
But it IS just like something she'd say!
But it IS just like something she'd say!
envika
+0 -0
I like to think that Ray's last line was referring to his last idea, not Beef's last idea.
I like to think that Ray's last line was referring to his last idea, not Beef's last idea.
riazm
+0 -0
Alt text can be used in conversation as the ultimate non-sequiter.
Cue some irritating Monty Python fan to tell me that it's not a non-sequiter.
Alt text can be used in conversation as the ultimate non-sequiter.
Cue some irritating Monty Python fan to tell me that it's not a non-sequiter.
littleherrdoktor
+7 -0
it's not a non-sequiter because you mean non-sequitur
it's not a non-sequiter because you mean non-sequitur
riazm
+21 -0
The interior of the car of pain is finished in fine walnut veneer. I know this because I am inside the car of pain. I am inside it and I am being taken to school.
The interior of the car of pain is finished in fine walnut veneer. I know this because I am inside the car of pain. I am inside it and I am being taken to school.
crev_gibax
+1 -0
Well conceded.
Well conceded.
littleherrdoktor
+1 -0
a for humility
a for humility
tekende
+2 -0
I wish I could give this strip higher than a 5 just for the alt-text alone. I said it to someone one time for no reason while he was in the middle of talking and he stopped and laughed.
I wish I could give this strip higher than a 5 just for the alt-text alone. I said it to someone one time for no reason while he was in the middle of talking and he stopped and laughed.
aliiis
+2 -0
YES.
I really, really rarely actually laugh out loud when I am reading things and all on my own and stuff. I do laugh in conversation fairly often but I dunno, just maybe not as much as other people? It is a thing. But this alt text made me genuinely guffaw, I cannot explain how exceptionally funny it is. I think it coming at you out of left field like that and you're all imagining Martha Stewart's cheery smile and... anyway, yeah.
YES.
I really, really rarely actually laugh out loud when I am reading things and all on my own and stuff. I do laugh in conversation fairly often but I dunno, just maybe not as much as other people? It is a thing. But this alt text made me genuinely guffaw, I cannot explain how exceptionally funny it is. I think it coming at you out of left field like that and you're all imagining Martha Stewart's cheery smile and... anyway, yeah.
kickstart
+2 -0
it's the "throw it at a friend " that makes it for me. "throw it at someone" just wouldn't do.
it's the "throw it at a friend " that makes it for me. "throw it at someone" just wouldn't do.
tekende
+1 -0
Exactly. I can't explain why it makes such a difference, but it does.
Exactly. I can't explain why it makes such a difference, but it does.
godfatherofsouls
+1 -0
watching onstad's thought process carve away until he found the phrase with the highest martha quotient.
watching onstad's thought process carve away until he found the phrase with the highest martha quotient.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Properly sterilised, a condom can serve as a passable replacement for a section of large intestine.
Properly sterilised, a condom can serve as a passable replacement for a section of large intestine.
molesticide
+1 -0
i masturbate with them.
what?
i masturbate with them.
what?
semiquaver
+0 -0
Yeah. ;-;
Yeah. ;-;
foetus_punch
+1 -0
You may have heard rumours that sex is actually better for uncircumcised guys while using a condom. These rumours (for me at least) are true.
You may have heard rumours that sex is actually better for uncircumcised guys while using a condom. These rumours (for me at least) are true.
semiquaver
+1 -0
One only wishes they could solve the pinching problem.
One only wishes they could solve the pinching problem.
trialandterror
+0 -1
what.
what.
trialandterror
+0 -2
Seriously, this is the most wrong you can be.
2 reasons to have sex - to feel good, and to make babies. Condoms prevent both. The work of the devil.
Seriously, this is the most wrong you can be.
2 reasons to have sex - to feel good, and to make babies. Condoms prevent both. The work of the devil.
foetus_punch
+0 -0
Yeah man! Totally! I mean, sex is exactly the same for for everyone, right?
Nah, I'm not buyin' it.
Yeah man! Totally! I mean, sex is exactly the same for for everyone, right?
Nah, I'm not buyin' it.
soticoto
+1 -1
Or it could be painted yellow to make an X-Men costume for enthusiastic young boys.
Wait... are we talking about normal-sized condoms now or the huge one?
Or it could be painted yellow to make an X-Men costume for enthusiastic young boys.
Wait... are we talking about normal-sized condoms now or the huge one?
iskander
+0 -0
Place a condom inside a light bulb for inexpensive mood lighting for parties, or other social events.
Place a condom inside a light bulb for inexpensive mood lighting for parties, or other social events.
bjorntd
+0 -0
... How would you get it in there?
OH. You meant the other way around.
... How would you get it in there?
OH. You meant the other way around.
bilingualmonkey
+1 -0
I love how in panel five they're basically fighting for the best Stewart impression, which Beef subsequently nails. Brilliantly observed.
I love how in panel five they're basically fighting for the best Stewart impression, which Beef subsequently nails. Brilliantly observed.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Oh, Hee, Hee, Hee, Hee, Hee...
Oh, Hee, Hee, Hee, Hee, Hee...
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
ideal
ideal
dorothyzbornak
+0 -0
they start to get competitive in panel four. i am for this strip.
they start to get competitive in panel four. i am for this strip.
A comment left by untilyouaresonude was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by fakead, Magb, Vtoph, SenseiHollywood)