untilyouaresonude
+35 -0
You can feel Onstad struggling to figure out which awful thing Todd did would be funnier, so he took the high ground and did both.
You can feel Onstad struggling to figure out which awful thing Todd did would be funnier, so he took the high ground and did both.
bourbonsamurai
+49 -0
I like that he picked things that are only a little a bit funny when you read about them but then when you think about how they went down are HYSTERICAL.
I like that he picked things that are only a little a bit funny when you read about them but then when you think about how they went down are HYSTERICAL.
woodenteeth
+11 -0
oh man! you just totally helped me articulate the Type of Humour that I prefer in general. i love a good punch line, but it's the imagination-cue that really does it. Chubby for you sir.
oh man! you just totally helped me articulate the Type of Humour that I prefer in general. i love a good punch line, but it's the imagination-cue that really does it. Chubby for you sir.
invidious
+73 -0
Absolutely. It's extra funny because these are things with comparatively minor consequences when a normal person screws them up, but Todd has somehow elevated epic failure into an art form.
Remember that time Todd jaywalked and six people died?
Absolutely. It's extra funny because these are things with comparatively minor consequences when a normal person screws them up, but Todd has somehow elevated epic failure into an art form.
Remember that time Todd jaywalked and six people died?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
ouch. i hurt my Laughbox chortling at the italicized sentence.
ouch. i hurt my Laughbox chortling at the italicized sentence.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
So much so you had to go to hospital?
So much so you had to go to hospital?
tripperday
+9 -0
It's even funnier if you know someone kind of like Todd.
Remember when Todd drunk dialed his ex-girlfriend and set his trailer on fire fighting cops?
It's even funnier if you know someone kind of like Todd.
Remember when Todd drunk dialed his ex-girlfriend and set his trailer on fire fighting cops?
valrus
+36 -0
AMBIGUOUS SENTENCE AHOY
Get 'em, trailer! Get those fire fighting cops!
AMBIGUOUS SENTENCE AHOY
Get 'em, trailer! Get those fire fighting cops!
dtuba
+0 -0
"Don't shooot, boys! It's just tacos!"
"Don't shooot, boys! It's just tacos!"
spinynorman
+14 -0
It's like Barry Bass trying to file for unemployment and getting deported. How the fuck did they manage that?
Remember that time Todd went to buy shoes and they had to close the government for a day?
It's like Barry Bass trying to file for unemployment and getting deported. How the fuck did they manage that?
Remember that time Todd went to buy shoes and they had to close the government for a day?
beverage
+3 -1
Remember when Todd learned to ride a horse and started a suicide cult?
Remember when Todd learned to ride a horse and started a suicide cult?
tekende
+2 -0
Remember when Todd tried to return his messed-up order at the McDonald's counter and the building owner was arrested for possession of illicit substances?
Remember when Todd tried to return his messed-up order at the McDonald's counter and the building owner was arrested for possession of illicit substances?
griffypoo
+1 -0
Remember when Todd went deep-sea fishing that one time and caused a 2 month PETA riot?
Remember when Todd went deep-sea fishing that one time and caused a 2 month PETA riot?
hyetal
+1 -0
Remember when Todd drank that expired milk and Yugoslavia disintegrated?
Remember when Todd drank that expired milk and Yugoslavia disintegrated?
pigeon_street
+2 -0
Remember how Todd tried to learn computers and now he's a registered sex offender?
Remember how Todd tried to learn computers and now he's a registered sex offender?
soticoto
+1 -1
Remember when pigeon_street forgot to italicise his comment and RUINED EVERYTHING?
Remember when pigeon_street forgot to italicise his comment and RUINED EVERYTHING?
huber
+4 -0
TODD should replace Tony Blair as the next Prime Minister
TODD should replace Tony Blair as the next Prime Minister
cryztal
+0 -0
Now, I ain't no brit, but I definitely agree that Todd should have a high political position somewhere .
Now, I ain't no brit, but I definitely agree that Todd should have a high political position somewhere .
greyfield
+0 -0
Better than Brown, at least.
Better than Brown, at least.
soticoto
+1 -0
And definitely better than Cameron.
And definitely better than Cameron.
arcibi
+28 -0
Todd must have messed his taxes up something fierce
Todd must have messed his taxes up something fierce
dzieger
+0 -0
A comment left by dzieger was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by alphagator, evolume, farqussus, godfatherofsouls, dr_sexlove)
A comment left by dzieger was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by alphagator, evolume, farqussus, godfatherofsouls, dr_sexlove)
nighttoad
+11 -2
quit laming this man! gee golly, as if his outstanding debt wasn't bad enough, you guys have to add insult to injury.
quit laming this man! gee golly, as if his outstanding debt wasn't bad enough, you guys have to add insult to injury.
dissembly
+0 -0
do six-figure debts happen to people who don't have six-figure incomes?
Penalties interest, i guess it's possible. That is hell of harsh if so, though.
do six-figure debts happen to people who don't have six-figure incomes?
Penalties interest, i guess it's possible. That is hell of harsh if so, though.
soticoto
+0 -0
Chubb for "gee golly".
Chubb for "gee golly".
farqussus
+0 -0
A comment left by farqussus was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Vondicus, Ariamaki, woodenteeth, atticusonline, mustconcentrate, gnjdfsgk)
A comment left by farqussus was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Vondicus, Ariamaki, woodenteeth, atticusonline, mustconcentrate, gnjdfsgk)
songbirdspectre
+0 -0
A comment left by songbirdspectre was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Ariamaki, mustconcentrate, jezebel, Zem)
A comment left by songbirdspectre was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Ariamaki, mustconcentrate, jezebel, Zem)
scorpio_nadir
+3 -0
You are the Hindenburg of walking into an H & R Block office.
You are the Hindenburg of walking into an H & R Block office.
spinynorman
+8 -0
I've stolen both of these as lies about myself to inflate my stature in the eyes of others.
I've stolen both of these as lies about myself to inflate my stature in the eyes of others.
tekende
+1 -0
So you...you told people that you yelled at your girlfriend so loud that you had to go to the hospital. And this made the people you told think more of you. I do not want to meet these people.
So you...you told people that you yelled at your girlfriend so loud that you had to go to the hospital. And this made the people you told think more of you. I do not want to meet these people.
fineoakstructure
+6 -0
You already have.
These people are assetbar.
You already have.
These people are assetbar.
achilleselbow
+1 -0
If someone told me that, I would think they were of low mind.
If someone told me that, I would think they were of low mind.
sp1derbaby
+4 -0
You're tall enough, Stephen Fry!
You're tall enough, Stephen Fry!
canusdivinus
+0 -1
He sells smack out of the back of his van!
He sells smack out of the back of his van!
canusdivinus
+0 -1
Mm, crap. Just re-read the strip.
Runs smack. Not sells.
Mm, crap. Just re-read the strip.
Runs smack. Not sells.
laserblade
+9 -0
Quoting Achewood is a serious and exacting process, akin to Talmudic study.
Quoting Achewood is a serious and exacting process, akin to Talmudic study.
bobbieluvsya
+1 -0
You have to memorize all the highest rated strips and recite them in their entirety for your family if you want to be considered an adult.
You have to memorize all the highest rated strips and recite them in their entirety for your family if you want to be considered an adult.
jezebel
+7 -0
You have no idea what amazing treasures I would give to be able to tell this to some of my tax clients.
"If you give me your information in a dirty, dilapidated shoebox this year, I am going to mess your taxes up so bad you almost get lethal injection."
You have no idea what amazing treasures I would give to be able to tell this to some of my tax clients.
"If you give me your information in a dirty, dilapidated shoebox this year, I am going to mess your taxes up so bad you almost get lethal injection."
natashamarie
+0 -0
i guess the underground has taxes?
i guess the underground has taxes?
ghostd
+9 -0
The squirrel police gots to get paid.
The squirrel police gots to get paid.
straw
+17 -0
Once you get below the knee the world gets pretty messed up
All arrestin you for intent to speed
Once you get below the knee the world gets pretty messed up
All arrestin you for intent to speed
bobbieluvsya
+0 -0
And someone has to pay for the bunny ambulances.
And someone has to pay for the bunny ambulances.
internnumber1
+2 -0
Beef is basically saying that Todd would end up being the squirrel James Stockdale. Phillipe would end up having to drive him off into the woods somewhere and leave him by the side of the road.
Beef is basically saying that Todd would end up being the squirrel James Stockdale. Phillipe would end up having to drive him off into the woods somewhere and leave him by the side of the road.
hollybones
+0 -0
A comment left by hollybones was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by nighttoad, mercuri0us, Connellingus)
A comment left by hollybones was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by nighttoad, mercuri0us, Connellingus)
professorhazard
+1 -0
No one said it could be done.
No one said it could be done.
feetnotes
+0 -0
I just love how bad Todd is in this one.
I just love how bad Todd is in this one.
dougthehead
+21 -0
What really sells this strip for me is the idea that Phillipe really likes and admires Todd.
What really sells this strip for me is the idea that Phillipe really likes and admires Todd.
steerpike66
+0 -1
Todd is so bad-ass; even his fucks-up (how's that correct grammar?!) are epic.
Todd is so bad-ass; even his fucks-up (how's that correct grammar?!) are epic.
zem
+1 -0
no, no, no, no! just because that's the way you pluralize some things doesn't mean you try to apply it to everything! you are like a person who misuses "whom" and then brags about his careful grammar
no, no, no, no! just because that's the way you pluralize some things doesn't mean you try to apply it to everything! you are like a person who misuses "whom" and then brags about his careful grammar
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
He is worst Merriam-Webster paperback that has been run over by Todd's van.
He is worst Merriam-Webster paperback that has been run over by Todd's van.
boswelljn
+1 -0
he FUCKED those taxes up.
he FUCKED those taxes up.
honesttom
+0 -0
Phillipe's sense of resignation in the last panel is gold.
Phillipe's sense of resignation in the last panel is gold.
tttt
+0 -0
last panel made me almost cry
last panel made me almost cry
molesticide
+3 -0
i love philippe's period on the last one. how he's finally admitted to himself what a terrible person todd is.
this ain't a party of crap dudes.
god DAMMIT, todd.
i love philippe's period on the last one. how he's finally admitted to himself what a terrible person todd is.
this ain't a party of crap dudes.
god DAMMIT, todd.
clintisiceman
+1 -0
Oh god. I'm just now going throught the archives for the first time, and these last two strips have made my love for Todd double. Or perhaps SQUARE.
Oh god. I'm just now going throught the archives for the first time, and these last two strips have made my love for Todd double. Or perhaps SQUARE.
clintisiceman
+2 -0
Wow. Me a couple months ago. I was a crappier dude than I am now.
Wow. Me a couple months ago. I was a crappier dude than I am now.
mountaindewtab
+0 -0
listen i dont say this often but "lol"
listen i dont say this often but "lol"
erinye
+0 -0
A comment left by erinye was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Afterward, Deusoma, Ariamaki)
A comment left by erinye was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Afterward, Deusoma, Ariamaki)
cpnglxynchos
+0 -1
word up.
word up.
baryonyx
+0 -0
Man, this strip is just a series of minor brilliances. Beef in panel three and Phileppe in panel eight.
Man, this strip is just a series of minor brilliances. Beef in panel three and Phileppe in panel eight.
charchar
+0 -0
A comment left by charchar was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by JenH, manthrax, Ariamaki)
A comment left by charchar was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by JenH, manthrax, Ariamaki)
snowman
+1 -0
Wow, I would not have thought of that as pedophilic until you pointed it out.
Wow, I would not have thought of that as pedophilic until you pointed it out.
heccibiggs
+1 -0
Aww that little ottery face of angry resolve...
Aww that little ottery face of angry resolve...
kelsotimebomb
+0 -0
And, ultimately, defeat.
You fought the good fight, Philippe.
And, ultimately, defeat.
You fought the good fight, Philippe.
tekende
+0 -0
I completely love panel three. It is my favorite part of this strip. Philippe's final "Yeah." is great too. There is a world of subtle difference between "Yeah..." and "Yeah."
I completely love panel three. It is my favorite part of this strip. Philippe's final "Yeah." is great too. There is a world of subtle difference between "Yeah..." and "Yeah."
the_dude
+0 -0
this is my favorite strip.
this is my favorite strip.
mikeronomicon
+0 -0
I'm curious, how bad do you have to fuck your taxes up to almost get lethal injection?
I'm curious, how bad do you have to fuck your taxes up to almost get lethal injection?
aperson
+2 -0
I think if you get polonium on the paperwork before sending it in...
I think if you get polonium on the paperwork before sending it in...
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
WHY FIND OUT?
WHY FIND OUT?
aperson
+2 -0
Vetting the vice presidential candidate: very important.
Vetting the vice presidential candidate: very important.
rumblefish
+1 -0
Philippe's expressions are just perfect here. Panel 7 he's reluctantly admitting that Todd may not be a great choice after all, panel 8 he's realising that Todd really is a ridiculous little man.
Philippe's expressions are just perfect here. Panel 7 he's reluctantly admitting that Todd may not be a great choice after all, panel 8 he's realising that Todd really is a ridiculous little man.
ham_shoes
+0 -0
I bet Todd's girlfriend is a real piece of work.
I bet Todd's girlfriend is a real piece of work.
tdoom
+0 -0
Panel 3 Beef has suddenly transformed into a creepy father figure
Panel 3 Beef has suddenly transformed into a creepy father figure
This is the best strip of all time. Todd is even more awesome in absence than in person.