scramblesthedog
+60 -0
Other things that you cannot buy from someone who has done oral on you: Fritos, chewing tobacco, Vaseline, or asparagus.
Other things that you cannot buy from someone who has done oral on you: Fritos, chewing tobacco, Vaseline, or asparagus.
deancain29
+14 -1
but you can buy mouthwash and toothpicks
but you can buy mouthwash and toothpicks
beansdooma
+18 -1
hello ma'am i would like some listerine and a blowjob
hello ma'am i would like some listerine and a blowjob
bixschmix
+4 -2
Steak & blowjob day is coming up soon!
Steak & blowjob day is coming up soon!
i_love_kate
+4 -0
The listerine part is just basically foreplay.
The listerine part is just basically foreplay.
invidious
+2 -0
I thought the listerine part replaced the cuddling afterwards.
I thought the listerine part replaced the cuddling afterwards.
farqussus
+1 -0
You're thinking of the throaty, choking, cat-with a furball noise of a ticklish pube ensconced in the epiglottis.
You're thinking of the throaty, choking, cat-with a furball noise of a ticklish pube ensconced in the epiglottis.
mr_lostman28
+3 -0
The steak... it is not part of the foreplay, but it is equally important.
The steak... it is not part of the foreplay, but it is equally important.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
makin' love for two whole...
courses ?
makin' love for two whole...
courses ?
jrpigman
+13 -0
While you cannot buy a burrito from someone who has done oral on you, you are permitted to buy a nachos bellgrande in the same situation.
While you cannot buy a burrito from someone who has done oral on you, you are permitted to buy a nachos bellgrande in the same situation.
atticusonline
+1 -1
or herpes medicine.
or herpes medicine.
dusty
+1 -0
(you got lamed because this board is full of herpes, don't say anything about it, they'll lame you)
(you got lamed because this board is full of herpes, don't say anything about it, they'll lame you)
atticusonline
+0 -0
I have learned my lesson.
I have learned my lesson.
isaach
+0 -0
good rule to live by
good rule to live by
deimosrising
+11 -0
Yeah it's almost totally impossible to do. You may think you'd be cool with it but somehow it turns out you just aren't, by and large.
Yeah it's almost totally impossible to do. You may think you'd be cool with it but somehow it turns out you just aren't, by and large.
dusty
+0 -0
On the other hand I once rented a boat from a guy who's wife had once done oral on me and it felt...well, it felt fantastic!
On the other hand I once rented a boat from a guy who's wife had once done oral on me and it felt...well, it felt fantastic!
zem
+4 -0
last panel: perfect facial expression
last panel: perfect facial expression
neoboman
+1 -0
I'll take it a step farther: last panel: perfect.
I'll take it a step farther: last panel: perfect.
_cheesekayke
+0 -0
6th panel: perfect facial expression.
Last panel: 73% perfect facial expression.
6th panel: perfect facial expression.
Last panel: 73% perfect facial expression.
howard
+3 -0
Oh, to have such problems.
Oh, to have such problems.
petitegitan
+1 -0
I love sodium.
I love sodium.
cuddlepaw
+17 -1
The Roast Beef.
7-Layers of love in that clever little cat heart of hers. Damn.
The Roast Beef.
7-Layers of love in that clever little cat heart of hers. Damn.
daniel-killen
+0 -0
Haha, I love Beef's face in the second panel. Deep in thought.
Haha, I love Beef's face in the second panel. Deep in thought.
relaxing
+3 -2
Man what
Man what
tinhand
+0 -0
A comment left by tinhand was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by nighttoad, orvel, stevegt500)
A comment left by tinhand was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by nighttoad, orvel, stevegt500)
laserblade
+2 -0
Because he must then perform burritolingus on it.
Because he must then perform burritolingus on it.
fielding
+3 -0
I have a feeling Mr. Kazenzakis has not and will never enter an "Arby's".
I have a feeling Mr. Kazenzakis has not and will never enter an "Arby's".
stevegt500
+0 -0
A comment left by stevegt500 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, equinn2006, werthog42, theplaidknight, rodneystubbs, Darthemed)
A comment left by stevegt500 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, equinn2006, werthog42, theplaidknight, rodneystubbs, Darthemed)
heccibiggs
+0 -0
Four Arby's lovers lamed you.
Four Arby's lovers lamed you.
invidious
+2 -0
I think that means there's only one left... where'd he go?
I think that means there's only one left... where'd he go?
solobuttons
+2 -1
BEEF.
YOU DOGG!
BEEF.
YOU DOGG!
kkrusty
+8 -0
panel 9 is exactly why i can't go to whole foods anymore.
panel 9 is exactly why i can't go to whole foods anymore.
mountaindewtab
+1 -0
is it really a fantasy for anybody?
is it really a fantasy for anybody?
darqhermit
+1 -0
And I am one of those men.
And I am one of those men.
spinynorman
+0 -0
A comment left by spinynorman was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by fosters, Aaron_Haynes, Zem)
A comment left by spinynorman was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by fosters, Aaron_Haynes, Zem)
spinynorman
+14 -0
You could also make a joke about mouthfuls of low quality meat if you want, I guess. It's really up to you.
You could also make a joke about mouthfuls of low quality meat if you want, I guess. It's really up to you.
pogo
+4 -0
I was just thinking you'd each have a hot tube in your respective mouths.
I was just thinking you'd each have a hot tube in your respective mouths.
cagliostro
+0 -0
I don't know if a single chubby has any worth to you any more, sir, but if I had more I would give them freely. I'm still laughing.
I don't know if a single chubby has any worth to you any more, sir, but if I had more I would give them freely. I'm still laughing.
heyman
+4 -1
All talkin the whole time to keep it from getting awkward, all offerin her a soda
All talkin the whole time to keep it from getting awkward, all offerin her a soda
luckypyjamas
+1 -0
i give a five for his mouth in the last panel
i give a five for his mouth in the last panel
dumase
+2 -1
A cat performed oral sex on another cat.
A cat performed oral sex on another cat.
ctrl_z
+0 -0
That Taco Bell logo is old school.
That Taco Bell logo is old school.
direhaggis
+3 -0
It's fascinating how every time there is panel with a fast food or hotel sign, the sky is a dismal gray or black color. All of these locations are presumably underground, including the KFC in Hell that Ray used, but I wonder if there's some commentary going on here.
It's fascinating how every time there is panel with a fast food or hotel sign, the sky is a dismal gray or black color. All of these locations are presumably underground, including the KFC in Hell that Ray used, but I wonder if there's some commentary going on here.
lawbot
+0 -0
I feel this way as well.
I feel this way as well.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Did Molly get fired from Applebee's or something? Did it have something to do with the boss who stares at her tits?
Did Molly get fired from Applebee's or something? Did it have something to do with the boss who stares at her tits?
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
maybe she has 2 job?
maybe she has 2 job?
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
job s
job s
pantscomeoff
+0 -0
Not even the Breast Man menu has roast beef on it.
Not even the Breast Man menu has roast beef on it.
chachibenji
+2 -0
Why are we so concerned about sodium.
Sodium will not kill you.
Sodium will not chill out in your heart and do terrible things.
Sodium is just fine.
Why are we so concerned about sodium.
Sodium will not kill you.
Sodium will not chill out in your heart and do terrible things.
Sodium is just fine.
bourbonsamurai
+0 -0
Also it is delicious.
Also it is delicious.
boredom_man
+4 -0
So go ahead, eat chopped ham on white bread
It's a triumph for your bod OH GOD
So go ahead, eat chopped ham on white bread
It's a triumph for your bod OH GOD
invidious
+1 -0
Ask a mummy about sodium.
Ask a mummy about sodium.
zaratustra
+2 -0
sodium will not kill you and hide your body in the basement.
sodium will not kill you and hide your body in the basement.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
He's trying to cut down on the sodium after his binge with the chicken thighs. Which, incidentally, occurred directly after his break-up with Molly...
A connection?!
He's trying to cut down on the sodium after his binge with the chicken thighs. Which, incidentally, occurred directly after his break-up with Molly...
A connection?!
mangecoeur
+0 -0
The lessons learned in this panel should be useful for the rest of my life.
The lessons learned in this panel should be useful for the rest of my life.
tripperday
+0 -0
Even though Yum! Brands (KFC, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell)was spun off from Pepsi years ago, it is still rare to find Diet Coke at a Taco Bell. I was still able to suspend my disbelief.
Even though Yum! Brands (KFC, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell)was spun off from Pepsi years ago, it is still rare to find Diet Coke at a Taco Bell. I was still able to suspend my disbelief.
tekende
+1 -0
Yeah but I mean you can get Diet Pepsi and they both basically taste terrible so you know whatever
Yeah but I mean you can get Diet Pepsi and they both basically taste terrible so you know whatever
kaz
+0 -0
fancyrat
+0 -0
I would pay many dollars to have Beef's dilemma here.
I would pay many dollars to have Beef's dilemma here.
dasilodavi
+0 -1
I ordered a burrito from a lady whom I had my fingers inside of. It was a pretty brutal experience.
I ordered a burrito from a lady whom I had my fingers inside of. It was a pretty brutal experience.
cagliostro
+3 -0
'Had', or 'had had'? The difference is crucial.
'Had', or 'had had'? The difference is crucial.
dasilodavi
+0 -0
Had had. I imagine you probably figured that out already though.
Had had. I imagine you probably figured that out already though.
carlyle
+1 -0
I always found, long before this, the phrase "Hey, you!" to be adorable.
I always found, long before this, the phrase "Hey, you!" to be adorable.
omegatron
+0 -0
Hey, you. You've been actin' strange all night. What's up?
[IMGS OFF]
Hey, you. You've been actin' strange all night. What's up?
[IMGS OFF]
lolsworth
+0 -0
Did Beef just realise that his name is also a foodstuff?
Did Beef just realise that his name is also a foodstuff?
thebigmike1983
+0 -0
The last panel is surely my greatest secret fear.
The last panel is surely my greatest secret fear.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
oh my lord... another coolest avatar ever contender!
oh my lord... another coolest avatar ever contender!
rowboat
+0 -0
THE JOLLY, CANDY-LIKE BUTTON!
THE JOLLY, CANDY-LIKE BUTTON!
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Part of the reason I'm messed up is because of that show. I am messed up, and so I liked watching that show. DIRECTION OF CAUSALITY!
Part of the reason I'm messed up is because of that show. I am messed up, and so I liked watching that show. DIRECTION OF CAUSALITY!
rowboat
+0 -0
I think that show actually saved me from insanity. It's hard to explain. It was just the perfect show to find and I was at the perfect age in which to find it.
I think that show actually saved me from insanity. It's hard to explain. It was just the perfect show to find and I was at the perfect age in which to find it.
sevenslashfour
+0 -0
Oh, god, I can't stop laughing
Roast Beef's first-reaction thought bubbles are always just the worst and I love them
Oh, god, I can't stop laughing
Roast Beef's first-reaction thought bubbles are always just the worst and I love them
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
i have thought this through and i would be at least ok with, if not full on thrilled by being served food by a lady who i have been intimate with.
i have thought this through and i would be at least ok with, if not full on thrilled by being served food by a lady who i have been intimate with.
redion
+0 -0
i dunno, somehow i am able to continue to work and function at the same place as my ex and she gave me all sorts of orals.
i dunno, somehow i am able to continue to work and function at the same place as my ex and she gave me all sorts of orals.
atypicaloracle
+0 -0
This is a basic truth that is widely known and accepted. You cannot buy a burrito from someone whose mouth is familiar in a pretty specific way with your junk.
This is a basic truth that is widely known and accepted. You cannot buy a burrito from someone whose mouth is familiar in a pretty specific way with your junk.
rowboat
+0 -0
Things I have bought from ladies who have done oral on me:
1. Movie tickets
2. A library card (didn't buy it, but the transaction is what matters)
3. An Americano
4. Oral
Things I have bought from ladies who have done oral on me:
1. Movie tickets
2. A library card (didn't buy it, but the transaction is what matters)
3. An Americano
4. Oral
dissembly
+0 -0
Oh man. When Molly appeared in the second-last panel, i felt like I was seeing MY girlfriend after being away for ages. I had to send her a text message just then to tell her how awesome she is.
Oh Onstad.
Oh man. When Molly appeared in the second-last panel, i felt like I was seeing MY girlfriend after being away for ages. I had to send her a text message just then to tell her how awesome she is.
Oh Onstad.
never had this problem... but i'll take the notion to heart if i ever run into this.
The Spanish Inquisition : When the man buys a burrito from the woman who just gave him hella orals.
A comment left by severide was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ted0phile, Triptaphane, Crowpaw, Sweetlips)
I suppose this is appropriately named because I do not expect it will ever happen.
nrsfw (not really safe for work)
It's good to be king
The opposite problem - buying a burrito from someone and then getting oral around the back of the taco truck - basically is rarely regarded as much of a problem and, indeed, is seen as beneficial by such as the main thinkers on the subject.
But one must consider the kind of people who are the main thinkers on such subjects. They are the same guys who go "Man if I were a chick I would be a total Slut! It would be awesome!"