scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Teodor's left leg all wilted his street name be Gimp.
Teodor's left leg all wilted his street name be Gimp.
shinkusan
+0 -0
If they remake the warriors:
A. everyone will looks like Teodor AKA Gimp.
B. it will be a terrible idea.
If they remake the warriors:
A. everyone will looks like Teodor AKA Gimp.
B. it will be a terrible idea.
greatjob
+4 -0
This guy's already all over the guy ring thing. [IMGS OFF]
This guy's already all over the guy ring thing. [IMGS OFF]
lordparadise
+0 -0
Also: Pervasive unquenching curiosity about the universe, only shaves left leg and left armpit.
Depending on what he eats for breakfast, he might be five for eight, which is four more than I can say.
Also: Pervasive unquenching curiosity about the universe, only shaves left leg and left armpit.
Depending on what he eats for breakfast, he might be five for eight, which is four more than I can say.
shinkusan
+0 -0
PLEASE make your one for eight be metal color headbands. PLEASE.
PLEASE make your one for eight be metal color headbands. PLEASE.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
It would be a sand day when you no longer had an interest in the universe. On the other hand, if you were wearing a metal color headband things might not look so bleak.
It would be a sand day when you no longer had an interest in the universe. On the other hand, if you were wearing a metal color headband things might not look so bleak.
shinkusan
+8 -0
For those of us who live by the beach, it is ALWAYS a sand day.
For those of us who live by the beach, it is ALWAYS a sand day.
lordparadise
+1 -0
It keeps my laser forehead in check.
It keeps my laser forehead in check.
shinkusan
+0 -0
of all of Scott Summers' children, LaserBrain was the most tortured. That is, until they made metal color headbands.
of all of Scott Summers' children, LaserBrain was the most tortured. That is, until they made metal color headbands.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
now they can drive cars.
now they can drive cars.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
He is also a magician.
He is also a magician.
belgand
+3 -0
This is the correct answer. As an occultist and professional eccentric he is actually mandated to wear a certain number of rings by the British government.
Because he is also an anarchist, however, he wears a few more as well.
This is the correct answer. As an occultist and professional eccentric he is actually mandated to wear a certain number of rings by the British government.
Because he is also an anarchist, however, he wears a few more as well.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Jethro Tull? Is that you man?
Jethro Tull? Is that you man?
lexsenthur
+5 -0
Alan Moore as played by Paul Giamatti
Alan Moore as played by Paul Giamatti
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
donald sutherland in "kellys heros".
donald sutherland in "kellys heros".
gormster
+0 -0
Is that Kram?
Is that Kram?
drskradley
+0 -0
It's Alan Moore, goddammit. A quick look at the Properties will do wonders for both your knowledge and your complexion.
It's Alan Moore, goddammit. A quick look at the Properties will do wonders for both your knowledge and your complexion.
sonofkong
+0 -0
To be fair, it looks a lot like Kram, and we'd all be pretty happy down here if it was Kram. Let's just say it's Kram.
To be fair, it looks a lot like Kram, and we'd all be pretty happy down here if it was Kram. Let's just say it's Kram.
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Well, we can say it. I don't know what it means, but we can say it.
Well, we can say it. I don't know what it means, but we can say it.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
It is pretty fun to say.
KRAAAAAAAAAAAAM
It is pretty fun to say.
KRAAAAAAAAAAAAM
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Shit! I put my fortune into waffle futures.
Shit! I put my fortune into waffle futures.
shinkusan
+2 -0
Thus spawning a Larry Niven series:
The Waffle Futures
Wherein the bravest waffles experience emotions througout KNOWN SPACE.
Thus spawning a Larry Niven series:
The Waffle Futures
Wherein the bravest waffles experience emotions througout KNOWN SPACE.
belgand
+0 -0
You did the correct thing. Onstad is wrong and tomatoes will continue to be terrible things that are only fit for consumption when processed into forms that render their intrinsic evil moot.
Waffles will continue to remain the superior food product.
Evidence: Waffles require a specialized device in order to construct them. There is absolutely nothing else you can ever hope to use a waffle iron to produce.
You did the correct thing. Onstad is wrong and tomatoes will continue to be terrible things that are only fit for consumption when processed into forms that render their intrinsic evil moot.
Waffles will continue to remain the superior food product.
Evidence: Waffles require a specialized device in order to construct them. There is absolutely nothing else you can ever hope to use a waffle iron to produce.
shinkusan
+0 -0
Reverse waffle irons.
Reverse waffle irons.
mr-siegal
+1 -0
They can produce interesting designs on tender young flesh; degree of permanency depending on pressure and temperature.
Is 'degree of permanency' an oxymoron?
They can produce interesting designs on tender young flesh; degree of permanency depending on pressure and temperature.
Is 'degree of permanency' an oxymoron?
belgand
+1 -1
This is like clamping a curling iron up backside of an all too unwilling partner: the fun is in the experimentation.
This is like clamping a curling iron up backside of an all too unwilling partner: the fun is in the experimentation.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
Best to make sure they are also unwitting.
Best to make sure they are also unwitting.
belgand
+0 -0
In my mind "all too unwilling" seemed like it implied something more like a rape fantasy someone who is totally into it even though they give every impression otherwise.
Seems like it came off as more of a bit that was cut from American Psycho. Damn, but that book actually made me wince a bit and put it down at one point. I can't remember the last time someone did that.
It was the bit with the rat towards the end
In my mind "all too unwilling" seemed like it implied something more like a rape fantasy someone who is totally into it even though they give every impression otherwise.
Seems like it came off as more of a bit that was cut from American Psycho. Damn, but that book actually made me wince a bit and put it down at one point. I can't remember the last time someone did that.
It was the bit with the rat towards the end
mercuri0us
+0 -0
I've never read that but now I'm going to have to. Don't spoil it for me now.
I've never read that but now I'm going to have to. Don't spoil it for me now.
belgand
+0 -0
You should read it because it's an excellent novel and a wonderful satire, but Ellis certainly puts his all into the torture. He's a classy dude who knows how to do it proper.
Less Than Zero could stand a chance at being taught in schools if not for the sex, drugs, and raping underage girls.
You should read it because it's an excellent novel and a wonderful satire, but Ellis certainly puts his all into the torture. He's a classy dude who knows how to do it proper.
Less Than Zero could stand a chance at being taught in schools if not for the sex, drugs, and raping underage girls.
roast_beef
+0 -0
Some of the name drops in American Psycho are ridiculous .
Some of the name drops in American Psycho are ridiculous .
granularsilica
+0 -0
Quote:
Not in the least.
Quote:
Is 'degree of permanency' an oxymoron?
Not in the least.
rowboat
+1 -0
On the contrary, the fact that waffles require a kitchen space-filling unitasker is a pretty serious strike against them.
Also, you're wrong about tomatoes. Dead wrong.
On the contrary, the fact that waffles require a kitchen space-filling unitasker is a pretty serious strike against them.
Also, you're wrong about tomatoes. Dead wrong.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Don't get all up in the dude's stew. It's dicey.
Don't get all up in the dude's stew. It's dicey.
belgand
+1 -0
Yet we see that Alton Brown has no problem filling his kitchen space with a waffle iron. I believe that this demonstrates how necessary and important the waffle truly is.
Yet we see that Alton Brown has no problem filling his kitchen space with a waffle iron. I believe that this demonstrates how necessary and important the waffle truly is.
rowboat
+0 -0
Well....you got me on that one. There is, however, the pertinent fact that my entire kitchen is about the size of Alton's fridge. Only two outlets, too. I have to be a little picky.
Well....you got me on that one. There is, however, the pertinent fact that my entire kitchen is about the size of Alton's fridge. Only two outlets, too. I have to be a little picky.
belgand
+0 -0
Mine is not much better. I have literally owned larger closets in the past.
Mine is not much better. I have literally owned larger closets in the past.
majestictrout
+0 -0
You can make grilled cheese sandwiches if you relax your definition of grilled.
You can make grilled cheese sandwiches if you relax your definition of grilled.
mattylite
+0 -0
They have just such a sandwich at Waffle House. With ham, too.
They have just such a sandwich at Waffle House. With ham, too.
scorpio_nadir
+1 -0
You muft sizzle it .
You muft sizzle it .
belgand
+0 -0
I've always found it odd that the waffles were really one of the worst aspects of Waffle House. Too late they realized it should have been the Hash Brown Shanty.
I've always found it odd that the waffles were really one of the worst aspects of Waffle House. Too late they realized it should have been the Hash Brown Shanty.
falseprophet
+33 -0
T-Mobile girls are trickster seductresses. I switched from T-Mobile prepaid to Verizon constantlypaid recently and I had to call T-Mobile first so I get my actual account number from them to port my phone number over. But the girl at the T-Mobile call center sounded so sweet and innocent that I was almost thwarted. She could tell that when I called to get my account number that I was going to use it to cancel my service. Why else would you need it? You could hear it in her voice. She went through the motions of saying "So...did you want to...add more minutes to your plan?" and like an assassin comforting his prey I said, "Yeah...I'll probably do that online pretty soon" and I remembered that this call was being recorded for quality assurance purposes and maybe if this girl failed one more time to convince a customer to upgrade their plan she would be cast out into the Winds and Economy. She sounded like she really liked her job too, it was the best thing she'd done with her life since she picked herself up by the bootstraps and walked out the strip club her head held high, her pimp's baby in her arms. And now I was sending her back to that.
"Was there anything else I could help you with today sir?"
"No...Thanks."
"...O-okay sir," she said.
"The reference number for this call is 782396.
"My name is Ashley.
G...goodbye."
"Goodbye Ashley."
.
T-Mobile girls are trickster seductresses. I switched from T-Mobile prepaid to Verizon constantlypaid recently and I had to call T-Mobile first so I get my actual account number from them to port my phone number over. But the girl at the T-Mobile call center sounded so sweet and innocent that I was almost thwarted. She could tell that when I called to get my account number that I was going to use it to cancel my service. Why else would you need it? You could hear it in her voice. She went through the motions of saying "So...did you want to...add more minutes to your plan?" and like an assassin comforting his prey I said, "Yeah...I'll probably do that online pretty soon" and I remembered that this call was being recorded for quality assurance purposes and maybe if this girl failed one more time to convince a customer to upgrade their plan she would be cast out into the Winds and Economy. She sounded like she really liked her job too, it was the best thing she'd done with her life since she picked herself up by the bootstraps and walked out the strip club her head held high, her pimp's baby in her arms. And now I was sending her back to that.
"Was there anything else I could help you with today sir?"
"No...Thanks."
"...O-okay sir," she said.
"The reference number for this call is 782396.
"My name is Ashley.
G...goodbye."
"Goodbye Ashley."
.
gladi8orrex
+7 -0
use at&t bro. keep ya minutes wit rollover, also switch to mac and drink pepsi
use at&t bro. keep ya minutes wit rollover, also switch to mac and drink pepsi
i_love_kate
+17 -0
If you can, try absorbing nitrogen into your bloodstream instead of oxygen.
If you can, try absorbing nitrogen into your bloodstream instead of oxygen.
gladi8orrex
+8 -0
w-will that make me go faster ?
w-will that make me go faster ?
gormster
+5 -0
only if you absorb both and synthesize nitrous oxide.
only if you absorb both and synthesize nitrous oxide.
greenkoolayd
+1 -0
at&t is a gigantic cockhead of a company, but the rollover minutes are certainly a silver lining.
at&t is a gigantic cockhead of a company, but the rollover minutes are certainly a silver lining.
machineelf
+6 -0
Silver lining on the cockhead? Onstad specifically stated no Prince Alberts in 2010.
Silver lining on the cockhead? Onstad specifically stated no Prince Alberts in 2010.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
he stated that they would not be a trend. they never have been, despite their existence.
he stated that they would not be a trend. they never have been, despite their existence.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
I have worked in a call centre for a mobile telephone company, and I can honestly say I would rather have been stripping. I'd have had more respect both for myself and the customers.
I have worked in a call centre for a mobile telephone company, and I can honestly say I would rather have been stripping. I'd have had more respect both for myself and the customers.
belgand
+0 -0
Agreed. I suspect that I would have been treated better by management as well.
Both employees and customers are also guaranteed to get screwed.
Agreed. I suspect that I would have been treated better by management as well.
Both employees and customers are also guaranteed to get screwed.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
"Daaaaaiiissssy...daaaaiiiissssy..."
Let me just say though, even though I'm pretty dissatisfied with my T-Mobile plan, I'd be lying if I said I ever got less than high quality customer from those guys, American or outsourced or otherwise. I recently had to suspend my service for a few months (outta da country yo) and they were very polite and helpful and all that. So if anything, get T-Mobile for the friendly service. If you have a plan with another provider, you could call T-Mobile and just chitchat if you want. I know I would.
"Daaaaaiiissssy...daaaaiiiissssy..."
Let me just say though, even though I'm pretty dissatisfied with my T-Mobile plan, I'd be lying if I said I ever got less than high quality customer from those guys, American or outsourced or otherwise. I recently had to suspend my service for a few months (outta da country yo) and they were very polite and helpful and all that. So if anything, get T-Mobile for the friendly service. If you have a plan with another provider, you could call T-Mobile and just chitchat if you want. I know I would.
belgand
+2 -0
Eh... the quality of people you speak to is really less important than the company's internal systems and plans to screw you as hard and often as possible. With the massive number of people working in call centers and the high turnover rates there's almost nothing they can do to make the employees do a good job. I mean, they can find ways to make it a lot worse for you and impose contradicting metrics ("Make more add-on sales during customer service calls, but we really need you to get your call times down."), but they have no way or inclination to weed out the employees that are obviously and significantly incompetent. Doing so would also deprive them of 90% of their staff.
If you're talking to an idiot the best response is to just hang up on them and call back until you hopefully reach someone who knows what they're doing. Anything else will just cause them to fuck up your information in the system and create further problems. This might take some time.
Eh... the quality of people you speak to is really less important than the company's internal systems and plans to screw you as hard and often as possible. With the massive number of people working in call centers and the high turnover rates there's almost nothing they can do to make the employees do a good job. I mean, they can find ways to make it a lot worse for you and impose contradicting metrics ("Make more add-on sales during customer service calls, but we really need you to get your call times down."), but they have no way or inclination to weed out the employees that are obviously and significantly incompetent. Doing so would also deprive them of 90% of their staff.
If you're talking to an idiot the best response is to just hang up on them and call back until you hopefully reach someone who knows what they're doing. Anything else will just cause them to fuck up your information in the system and create further problems. This might take some time.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Yeah I don't care about any of that though because I always get the exact opposite of what you just said.
Yeah I don't care about any of that though because I always get the exact opposite of what you just said.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
He likely don't pray too often either
.
"Divine Help Center, how may I help you in your time of need?"
CLICK!
He likely don't pray too often either
.
"Divine Help Center, how may I help you in your time of need?"
CLICK!
c_dizzle
+0 -0
Oh good lord those pants make it look like Teodore has sever goiters on his inner thighs.
Oh good lord those pants make it look like Teodore has sever goiters on his inner thighs.
thegoblins
+0 -0
That's where keeps his THYROIDS.
That's where keeps his THYROIDS.
xenoterranos
+1 -0
There are treatments:
[IMGS OFF]
There are treatments:
[IMGS OFF]
jeffspaulding
+4 -0
That's one way to keep a leg up on the competition.
That's one way to keep a leg up on the competition.
cracklewater
+3 -0
Morgan's Tape!
The ways we used to try to play God
Morgan's Tape!
The ways we used to try to play God
granularsilica
+0 -0
I gotta recommend this with your bitches, bros.
I gotta recommend this with your bitches, bros.
shinkusan
+1 -0
This is #73, by the way.
This is #73, by the way.
gladi8orrex
+10 -0
he l pme i m trapped i m no t a lr r i g ht
call my mom
he l p
granularsilica
+0 -0
Fourteen! As close as I'll ever get to being first.
Fourteen! As close as I'll ever get to being first.
askingman
+0 -0
Roast Beef is Miami Vice in reverse.
Roast Beef is Miami Vice in reverse.
telescreen
+2 -0
Vice Miami?
I guess that sounds like some kind of 80's action hero, the kind who kicks ass/takes names/is a loose cannon.
Vice Miami?
I guess that sounds like some kind of 80's action hero, the kind who kicks ass/takes names/is a loose cannon.
telescreen
+1 -0
We should make more names like this. Here is my entry:
Cobra McCallister
We should make more names like this. Here is my entry:
Cobra McCallister
belgand
+1 -0
Iniquity Hialeah
Iniquity Hialeah
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Ferris Number 5
Ferris Number 5
telescreen
+1 -0
No no no
Brent Camaro
No no no
Brent Camaro
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
Garth Porsche?
Garth Porsche?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Spray Bone only needs to "accidentally" castrate seven more white guys in wifebeaters named Dannybob before they inbreed, and he's completed his community service!
Spray Bone only needs to "accidentally" castrate seven more white guys in wifebeaters named Dannybob before they inbreed, and he's completed his community service!
achtung
+0 -0
people just need to stop wearing wifebeaters named Dannybob, it is getting silly what a fad that is
people just need to stop wearing wifebeaters named Dannybob, it is getting silly what a fad that is
xenoterranos
+0 -0
I'm gonna change my name to "Real-Numbers Mercedes" and get me a pair of those swank rings. Best smoking jacket monogram ever.
I'm gonna change my name to "Real-Numbers Mercedes" and get me a pair of those swank rings. Best smoking jacket monogram ever.
gormster
+1 -0
Oh my god, I watched that movie last night! Clint Eastwood used to be hot.
Oh my god, I watched that movie last night! Clint Eastwood used to be hot.
duperando
+0 -0
Oh my gosh I have no idea what movie you're talking about but I loved Clint Eastwood back in the day. He was so very attractive with his squintyness and such. A chubby for you.
On an unrelated topic, Teodor looks like he has some sort of camel toe goin on.
Oh my gosh I have no idea what movie you're talking about but I loved Clint Eastwood back in the day. He was so very attractive with his squintyness and such. A chubby for you.
On an unrelated topic, Teodor looks like he has some sort of camel toe goin on.
duperando
+0 -0
aw dang. out of chubbies. and I was lame with my little messup on the bbcode thang. I meant to do italics.
aw dang. out of chubbies. and I was lame with my little messup on the bbcode thang. I meant to do italics.
mystkmanat
+0 -0
No worries, I chubbied him for you.
No worries, I chubbied him for you.
gormster
+0 -0
Also: it's Rolls Royce, not the Set of Reals.
Also: it's Rolls Royce, not the Set of Reals.
thegoblins
+1 -0
Does a class ring count as a guy ring? I feel that people who wear their class rings long, long after high school is over (i.e. 28/29) should perhaps seek some other adventures.
Does a class ring count as a guy ring? I feel that people who wear their class rings long, long after high school is over (i.e. 28/29) should perhaps seek some other adventures.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
does that apply to varsity jackets, as well?
does that apply to varsity jackets, as well?
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
People should go to Circumstances soon after high school and pawn their class rings to avoid such a horrific social faux pas.
I have no class...rings.
People should go to Circumstances soon after high school and pawn their class rings to avoid such a horrific social faux pas.
I have no class...rings.
thegoblins
+1 -0
Well, I...er...know a fella who is somewhat in Circumstances. He still has the ring. Though he takes it off when necessary.
Well, I...er...know a fella who is somewhat in Circumstances. He still has the ring. Though he takes it off when necessary.
belgand
+0 -0
In my understanding Circumstances and "upside the head" are coexist with a much greater frequency than in the rest of the population. In such cases a class ring is a decided boon.
Performing digital stimulation of a female depends far more on her personal proclivities and one's desire not to lose the ring.
In my understanding Circumstances and "upside the head" are coexist with a much greater frequency than in the rest of the population. In such cases a class ring is a decided boon.
Performing digital stimulation of a female depends far more on her personal proclivities and one's desire not to lose the ring.
granularsilica
+0 -0
So that's where I lost my ring!
So that's where I lost my ring!
belgand
+2 -0
This is widely regarded as an ideal way to propose marriage.
This is widely regarded as an ideal way to propose marriage.
thegoblins
+0 -0
I'm not sure I understand that first sentence.
I'm not sure I understand that first sentence.
belgand
+0 -0
I mistakenly left "are" in from an earlier edit. Please read as:
"In my understanding Circumstances and 'upside the head' occur together with a much greater frequency than in the rest of the population."
The class ring is an ideal accessory for backhanding.
I mistakenly left "are" in from an earlier edit. Please read as:
"In my understanding Circumstances and 'upside the head' occur together with a much greater frequency than in the rest of the population."
The class ring is an ideal accessory for backhanding.
thegoblins
+0 -0
Ah. But its use is questionable in fingering. This we agree upon.
Ah. But its use is questionable in fingering. This we agree upon.
belgand
+0 -0
Although equally ugly and garish I think there might be an exception for people who have won rings for sports-related championships.
I never understood the point of class rings myself, but that won't prevent me from running an ad in this space ( And for totally outrageous class rings, it's Josten's. Go, Josten's! ).
Belgand is secretly upset that people don't habitually wear championship belts all the time. Except for rodeo belt buckles which he wishes they would stop doing.
Although equally ugly and garish I think there might be an exception for people who have won rings for sports-related championships.
I never understood the point of class rings myself, but that won't prevent me from running an ad in this space ( And for totally outrageous class rings, it's Josten's. Go, Josten's! ).
Belgand is secretly upset that people don't habitually wear championship belts all the time. Except for rodeo belt buckles which he wishes they would stop doing.
hatstand_mcq
+1 -0
I hadn't heard of class rings before. I did a little light googling, and I want to know how they became so repulsively tacky. I can appreciate that the idea of all of a class having one shared memento of their time together is a pleasant one, even if it wouldn't be something I myself would set great store by, but there is no need to make that memento a sickeningly vulgar and showy piece of baublery which looks like it was designed by a group of brain damaged rappers who needed to spend a large chunk of their wealth before the end of the fiscal year as part of a complicated tax dodge. Some of those class rings were so ostentatious that the pope would have been ashamed to be seen wearing them.
I hadn't heard of class rings before. I did a little light googling, and I want to know how they became so repulsively tacky. I can appreciate that the idea of all of a class having one shared memento of their time together is a pleasant one, even if it wouldn't be something I myself would set great store by, but there is no need to make that memento a sickeningly vulgar and showy piece of baublery which looks like it was designed by a group of brain damaged rappers who needed to spend a large chunk of their wealth before the end of the fiscal year as part of a complicated tax dodge. Some of those class rings were so ostentatious that the pope would have been ashamed to be seen wearing them.
granularsilica
+0 -0
If all you have is a high school ring, poor you! People get college rings, you know.
If all you have is a high school ring, poor you! People get college rings, you know.
nice-on-water
+1 -0
Oh god, great, now anything I do this year will be punctuated with "Mr. 2010!" Changing lanes like Mr. 2010! Withdrawing from the ATM like Mr. 2010! Taking the tag off a shirt without ripping through it with the little zip tie thing like Mr. 2010! I also foresee many beefsteak tomatoes in my future.
Oh god, great, now anything I do this year will be punctuated with "Mr. 2010!" Changing lanes like Mr. 2010! Withdrawing from the ATM like Mr. 2010! Taking the tag off a shirt without ripping through it with the little zip tie thing like Mr. 2010! I also foresee many beefsteak tomatoes in my future.
r1pp3r
+0 -0
Posting on assetbar like Mr 2010!
Posting on assetbar like Mr 2010!
nice-on-water
+3 -0
:|
:o
Bo
:|
:o
Bo
hatstand_mcq
+1 -0
Today I googled meatus. I should have left it at that, but I took a brief wiki-walk to 'meatal stenosis'. 'Hah, disgusting' I chortled and blithely clicked the blue link that said 'meatotomy'. Do not do what I have done, unless a bisected bell-end gets your juices flowing.
Today I googled meatus. I should have left it at that, but I took a brief wiki-walk to 'meatal stenosis'. 'Hah, disgusting' I chortled and blithely clicked the blue link that said 'meatotomy'. Do not do what I have done, unless a bisected bell-end gets your juices flowing.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Bisected bell-end is all I need to hear. Advice heeded.
Also, Bisected Bell End: great band name or best band name?
Bisected bell-end is all I need to hear. Advice heeded.
Also, Bisected Bell End: great band name or best band name?
i_love_kate
+0 -0
How is it that this word has entered my life twice now, and both times have been through AssetBar.
Urethral stimulation.
How is it that this word has entered my life twice now, and both times have been through AssetBar.
Urethral stimulation.
ratacat
+0 -0
usage: "Janice enjoys the ethereal sensation she gets from urethral stimulation."
usage: "Janice enjoys the ethereal sensation she gets from urethral stimulation."
belgand
+0 -0
Sounding is definitely a thing. I wonder, however, why I have never seen someone who has decided that they wish to combine sounding with docking and produced full-on urethral penetrating intercourse. It seems like if it existed I would have seen evidence on Stileproject back in the day* or wherever such things seem to come up today. It seems perhaps a bit too far even for BME.
Sounding is definitely a thing. I wonder, however, why I have never seen someone who has decided that they wish to combine sounding with docking and produced full-on urethral penetrating intercourse. It seems like if it existed I would have seen evidence on Stileproject back in the day* or wherever such things seem to come up today. It seems perhaps a bit too far even for BME.
ratacat
+0 -0
docking?
docking?
srikamaraja
+2 -0
Lycanthropine Hcl 25mg tablets
Isn't it time you had the talk?
Lycanthropine Hcl 25mg tablets
Isn't it time you had the talk?
tungstenseabass
+0 -0
Can someone show me a site with metal-color headbands so I can buy one?
Can someone show me a site with metal-color headbands so I can buy one?
nice-on-water
+6 -0
You can bet your biscuits American Apparel has some gay-ass metal-colored headbands. Alt: gay ass-metal colored-head bands.
You can bet your biscuits American Apparel has some gay-ass metal-colored headbands. Alt: gay ass-metal colored-head bands.
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
I'd bet my biscuits, but I'm presently outta dough.
I'd bet my biscuits, but I'm presently outta dough.
miaou
+14 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Damn, even the fucking More Views and Related.
Damn, even the fucking More Views and Related.
hamscout
+0 -0
...and the region. Truly a masterpiece.
...and the region. Truly a masterpiece.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
God damn.
God damn.
hamscout
+2 -0
I think Ortho Kinetics has just what you need to straighten things out...
[IMGS OFF]
I think Ortho Kinetics has just what you need to straighten things out...
[IMGS OFF]
mensch
+0 -0
Great, another kink I can't (legally) indulge.
Great, another kink I can't (legally) indulge.
thegoblins
+0 -0
It's a kink that needs straightening.
It's a kink that needs straightening.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Ray Davies?
Ray Davies?
thegoblins
+0 -0
Tastes just like Coca Cola?
Tastes just like Coca Cola?
puguglypress
+0 -0
Fortunately for these girls, he's both straight AND narrow lol
Fortunately for these girls, he's both straight AND narrow lol
wtfoxnews
+0 -0
Guy rings are totally Mini-Max
Guy rings are totally Mini-Max
vole-in-hand
+1 -0
Is there an expiration date when it comes to a decade going retro?
[IMGS OFF]
It could happen.
Is there an expiration date when it comes to a decade going retro?
[IMGS OFF]
It could happen.
hereward
+0 -0
That guy looks amazing, but completely unprepared for battle of any sort. Do you think the designer of the shirt made the arms like that in order to make the wearer look more muscly and imposing?
That guy looks amazing, but completely unprepared for battle of any sort. Do you think the designer of the shirt made the arms like that in order to make the wearer look more muscly and imposing?
cracklewater
+0 -0
I suspect that since he had the juice to get painted in oils, he's probably a junior aristocrat posing in his ceremonial role as a military man.
Just a guess and I could be completely off the mark, as the toffs of yore did actually get their hands dirty/bloody from time to time.
On the face of it, this looks like an older version of GWB in his flight suit or prince Harry all kitted out for Afghanistan.
I suspect that since he had the juice to get painted in oils, he's probably a junior aristocrat posing in his ceremonial role as a military man.
Just a guess and I could be completely off the mark, as the toffs of yore did actually get their hands dirty/bloody from time to time.
On the face of it, this looks like an older version of GWB in his flight suit or prince Harry all kitted out for Afghanistan.
granularsilica
+1 -0
He's a pikeman, and all they do is stand in a mob and hold their staffs erect, so as to impale the cavalry charging at them.
He's a pikeman, and all they do is stand in a mob and hold their staffs erect, so as to impale the cavalry charging at them.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Medieval warfare was a flamboyant affair.
Medieval warfare was a flamboyant affair.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
Ooooh Matron!
Ooooh Matron!
cracklewater
+0 -0
Portrait of a Halberdier.
Not quite a pike, but close enough.
The gold chain and prissy expression had me thinking otherwise, but apparently:
"a young citizen soldier ... stands in cream and red with a sword at his hip and a halberd in his hand. It was painted when the Florentine Republic was under attack in 1529; the youth is a volunteer soldier ready to defend his city.
The Republic was crushed after a siege in which tens of thousands of people died."
Portrait of a Halberdier.
Not quite a pike, but close enough.
The gold chain and prissy expression had me thinking otherwise, but apparently:
"a young citizen soldier ... stands in cream and red with a sword at his hip and a halberd in his hand. It was painted when the Florentine Republic was under attack in 1529; the youth is a volunteer soldier ready to defend his city.
The Republic was crushed after a siege in which tens of thousands of people died."
granularsilica
+0 -0
Cool weapon! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halberd
Cool weapon! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halberd
cracklewater
+0 -0
Indeed. This small discussion caused me to learn the differences between pike, glaive, halberd and several other pole-arms.
For this I am thankful.
Indeed. This small discussion caused me to learn the differences between pike, glaive, halberd and several other pole-arms.
For this I am thankful.
granularsilica
+1 -0
War used to be so ... personal.
War used to be so ... personal.
belgand
+0 -0
I think it just used to be far more Flemish really.
Ain't nobody much these days knowing a Guisarme-Voulge from a Bec de Corbin even though they have significantly different uses.
I think it just used to be far more Flemish really.
Ain't nobody much these days knowing a Guisarme-Voulge from a Bec de Corbin even though they have significantly different uses.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Yeah, whatever, dude. I was thinking hand-to-hand, personally killing the guy in fornt of you, rather than shooting into the bushes or dropping a bomb from 10,000 feet.
Yeah, whatever, dude. I was thinking hand-to-hand, personally killing the guy in fornt of you, rather than shooting into the bushes or dropping a bomb from 10,000 feet.
belgand
+0 -0
True, but at the same time it would not be uncommon to have been struck down by massed longbowmen or slaughtered in one of many ways by the various types of siege weaponry.
Impersonal death has a long and glorious history.
True, but at the same time it would not be uncommon to have been struck down by massed longbowmen or slaughtered in one of many ways by the various types of siege weaponry.
Impersonal death has a long and glorious history.
granularsilica
+0 -0
Ach! How could I forget archers! I've seen Braveheart numerous times (It has the "What news from the north?" line.
And who could forget flinging large rocks and dumping boiling oil?
Ach! How could I forget archers! I've seen Braveheart numerous times (It has the "What news from the north?" line.
And who could forget flinging large rocks and dumping boiling oil?
hatstand_mcq
+6 -0
Your definition of 'completely unprepared for battle' includes people carrying swords and bloody great polearms? That's a pretty battle-ready set up, for day to day purposes. You'd certainly struggle to get into a nightclub or onto an aeroplane with that sort of hardware.
Your definition of 'completely unprepared for battle' includes people carrying swords and bloody great polearms? That's a pretty battle-ready set up, for day to day purposes. You'd certainly struggle to get into a nightclub or onto an aeroplane with that sort of hardware.
belgand
+0 -0
If only I had more moderation I would be better able to moderate you as you deserve. Alas, I am chubbied out.
If only I had more moderation I would be better able to moderate you as you deserve. Alas, I am chubbied out.
belgand
+0 -0
Ah, a bit of rest seems to have recovered my stamina and once again I can rise to the occasion.
Ah, a bit of rest seems to have recovered my stamina and once again I can rise to the occasion.
varnish
+0 -0
Whether the the fashion is waxed mustaches in the style of the Kaiser, or hideous outfits in fluorescent green like a 1980's vision of the future, waffles will always be a trend. There's no denying the food that the gods wish they had.
Whether the the fashion is waxed mustaches in the style of the Kaiser, or hideous outfits in fluorescent green like a 1980's vision of the future, waffles will always be a trend. There's no denying the food that the gods wish they had.
randyleepublic
+0 -0
a better than average Subnormality: https://www.viruscomix.com/page505.html
a better than average Subnormality: https://www.viruscomix.com/page505.html
vermy
+0 -0
I need to get a metal colored headband, so I may share to the world my curiosity about... space.
I need to get a metal colored headband, so I may share to the world my curiosity about... space.
nice-on-water
+1 -0
Are we witnessing history? First Achewood to utilize hot pink? GET BACK TO ME.
Are we witnessing history? First Achewood to utilize hot pink? GET BACK TO ME.
dirkstar
+0 -0
Was this presentation put together using Power Point? I like Power Point...
Was this presentation put together using Power Point? I like Power Point...
granularsilica
+0 -0
Only 86 comments on a new strips first 24-hour period? Has some alien virus swept through our ranks?
Only 86 comments on a new strips first 24-hour period? Has some alien virus swept through our ranks?
re5urgam
+0 -0
I, too, am surprised. There are far too many opportunities for sarcastic remarks about the various things and kinds of people presented in this strip for there to be so few comments. My hope is that really solid comments are just brewing, and hilarity will ensue soon enough.
I, too, am surprised. There are far too many opportunities for sarcastic remarks about the various things and kinds of people presented in this strip for there to be so few comments. My hope is that really solid comments are just brewing, and hilarity will ensue soon enough.
ratacat
+0 -0
I haven't really read this strip yet. Don't plan to either.
I haven't really read this strip yet. Don't plan to either.
awksedperl
+0 -0
Man, that is one confusing March Madness bracket* Onstad has concocted. I don't know how you'd bet on it. And isn't that what all brackets are for?
*American college basketball** tournament conflict paper, used by most to lose many other scraps of smaller green paper.
**What Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant & Lebron James did/do between filming commercials.
Man, that is one confusing March Madness bracket* Onstad has concocted. I don't know how you'd bet on it. And isn't that what all brackets are for?
*American college basketball** tournament conflict paper, used by most to lose many other scraps of smaller green paper.
**What Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant & Lebron James did/do between filming commercials.
awksedperl
+0 -0
In an effort to demystify the alt-text for some (or at least to save folks some time looking it up): Graham Kerr was a chef on American T.V. (and perhaps elsewhere) who had a show in the 1970s called "The Galloping Gourmet". During this time he was a drunk. I don't remember him as wearing a lot of rings, but I trust Onstad on that. After he sobered up years later his new show was called something with his name in it rather than the previous title, which was too bad.
In an effort to demystify the alt-text for some (or at least to save folks some time looking it up): Graham Kerr was a chef on American T.V. (and perhaps elsewhere) who had a show in the 1970s called "The Galloping Gourmet". During this time he was a drunk. I don't remember him as wearing a lot of rings, but I trust Onstad on that. After he sobered up years later his new show was called something with his name in it rather than the previous title, which was too bad.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
onstrad isnt saying graham kerr wore rings. he is saying that the time in history when graham kerr had a show on TV was the last time that rings for dudes was a popular trend.
onstrad isnt saying graham kerr wore rings. he is saying that the time in history when graham kerr had a show on TV was the last time that rings for dudes was a popular trend.
awksedperl
+0 -0
Yep, upon re-reading it I think you're right. Me not parse english gud.
Yep, upon re-reading it I think you're right. Me not parse english gud.
belgand
+0 -0
That is still one of the greatest cooking shows ever made. Rarely do you get to see someone fuck up the dish and then reach the end of the show and have to say that it didn't quite come out and something else still needs a bit longer to cook.
Food Network used to re-run it late at night a number of years ago. They need to bring that back.
I'm glad that he has his life together and all, but let's face it, drunks are a lot more fun than dudes into low-calorie cooking.
That is still one of the greatest cooking shows ever made. Rarely do you get to see someone fuck up the dish and then reach the end of the show and have to say that it didn't quite come out and something else still needs a bit longer to cook.
Food Network used to re-run it late at night a number of years ago. They need to bring that back.
I'm glad that he has his life together and all, but let's face it, drunks are a lot more fun than dudes into low-calorie cooking.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
sure, if those are the only choices.
sure, if those are the only choices.
call_burns
+0 -0
wow, that's it. i've read every strip in like three months. now im going to have to wait for a daily hit. shit.
wow, that's it. i've read every strip in like three months. now im going to have to wait for a daily hit. shit.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
It's like when you first get abducted as a white slave and they pump you full of heroin every day, then suddenly you're saved by the goddamned EU and you have to go prowl around the rough part of town, desperately hoping not to be mistaken for a prostitute.
Sigh.
It's like when you first get abducted as a white slave and they pump you full of heroin every day, then suddenly you're saved by the goddamned EU and you have to go prowl around the rough part of town, desperately hoping not to be mistaken for a prostitute.
Sigh.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
has that happened to you often?
has that happened to you often?
granularsilica
+0 -0
Once was enough for me!
Once was enough for me!
belgand
+0 -0
The better option is to take lessons in firearms and stunt driving during your days off.
Fashion tip: Eyepatches are a classic bad-ass look that never goes out of style.
The better option is to take lessons in firearms and stunt driving during your days off.
Fashion tip: Eyepatches are a classic bad-ass look that never goes out of style.
shinkusan
+0 -0
Err, based on your profile at least, you haven't read everything. I guess you just weren't logged in? There are 1613 strips total, including this one.
Err, based on your profile at least, you haven't read everything. I guess you just weren't logged in? There are 1613 strips total, including this one.
achtung
+0 -0
my personal path was 1) read the archives in some ungodly-short amount of time, 2) join the assetbar community with bright optimism for an achewood future, 3) learn that strip views means something for comment posting chubby/lame giving, 4) realize that my profile shows only 1 strip view, and 5)say "fuck you assetbar" for the first time [also referred to as "popping your assetbar cherry"]
my personal path was 1) read the archives in some ungodly-short amount of time, 2) join the assetbar community with bright optimism for an achewood future, 3) learn that strip views means something for comment posting chubby/lame giving, 4) realize that my profile shows only 1 strip view, and 5)say "fuck you assetbar" for the first time [also referred to as "popping your assetbar cherry"]
jeffspaulding
+1 -0
Quote:
What strip have you been reading?
Quote:
a daily hit
What strip have you been reading?
deus
+0 -0
Holy shit Beef...
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/autaux?b=M^a11f09b8576e606bcb5038dfdb92fb821&u=https%3A%2F%2Fachewood.com%2Fcomic.php%3Fdate%3D07282006
Holy shit Beef...
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/autaux?b=M^a11f09b8576e606bcb5038dfdb92fb821&u=https%3A%2F%2Fachewood.com%2Fcomic.php%3Fdate%3D07282006
desert_donkey
+0 -0
the more things change, the more they stay the same.
the more things change, the more they stay the same.
deusoma
+0 -0
Am I the only person who can't rate strips anymore? It's not like I've been trolling and got blocked or something, but trying to vote on a strip just links me to the top of the same page without affecting my rating.
Am I the only person who can't rate strips anymore? It's not like I've been trolling and got blocked or something, but trying to vote on a strip just links me to the top of the same page without affecting my rating.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
There was a staff memo on that about a month ago, Doctor.
All Rating privileges are suspended for all personnel(likely thanks to AIU, but keep it under your smock thingy)
There was a staff memo on that about a month ago, Doctor.
All Rating privileges are suspended for all personnel
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
Quote:
But I keep my thingy under my smock .
Quote:
keep it under your smock thingy
But I keep my thingy under my smock .
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it's been impossible since forever.
i miss your avicon.
i need to watch more tv.
('cos i can now.)
it's been impossible since forever.
i miss your avicon.
i need to watch more tv.
('cos i can now.)
westquote
+0 -0
The artist describes the T-Mobile representatives like the main course at a nice restaurant: "Thick blondes in crisp Dickies"
The artist describes the T-Mobile representatives like the main course at a nice restaurant: "Thick blondes in crisp Dickies"
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lycanthropy_(disambiguation)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lycanthropy_(disambiguation)
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lycanthropy_(disambiguation)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lycanthropy_(disambiguation)
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lycanthropy_(disambiguation)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lycanthropy_(disambiguation)
jeffspaulding
+0 -0
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive-compulsive_disorder
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive-compulsive_disorder
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive-compulsive_disorder
* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive-compulsive_disorder
mr-siegal
+0 -0
What's this about obsessive-compulsive disorder?
I thought the point about obsessive-compulsives was that they coudn't tolerate disorder?
What's this about obsessive-compulsive disorder?
I thought the point about obsessive-compulsives was that they coudn't tolerate disorder?
cracklewater
+0 -0
That's why that have to keep washing their hands.
That's why that have to keep washing their hands.
MR 2010
*eighth note, sixteenth note*
oh jesus. am i really first? i thought it was a joke
Man you need more shiiiiiit to get a measure goin.
After your composition: *eighth note, two sixteenth notes, 1 21st century note.*
Should be a dotted eighth and sixteenth. Swing baby!
I hate to get all music-geek on your ass, but that's more of a shuffle. Eighth and sixteenth (quaver and semi-quaver to us Brits, fact fans!) is fine for a fast swing feel. Think "Sir Duke".
But then you're missing a quarter of a beat (equal to a 16th note [semi-quaver] in 4/4).
Of course in real jazz, the notation is merely eighth notes (played approximately like a dotted eighth and sixteenth). I provide the following as "confirmation."
[IMGS OFF]
I'm totally hearing that in Groucho-voice, all rapidly Grouch-walking around the room, eyebrows manically....
what do you call that eyebrows going up and down rapidly with leer business?
an eyebrow shrug, is what the phenomenon is known as, im sure.
that extra comma is free of, charge.,,,,,,,,,
They call it, the Oxford Comma.
It's more than just a regular leer. It's a King Leer.
Quote:
The French probably call it "playing with your zipper."
Not necessarily, if you play them as a triplet (in other words, a triplet with the first two notes tied).
[IMGS OFF]
immediately followed by:
[IMGS OFF]
insert peanuts
and
gradually become agitated
are my favourites.
naw man. Best part is "sell mute"
no.
"saxes move downstage"
"He knows about TIME, man!" "Yes, yes, yes!"
- Dean M.
Eighth sixteenth is a perfectly acceptable combination in any triple meter (3/8, 6/8, 12/8, or the Stravinskian 3/16), though a dotted-eighth sixteenth would be a more practical syncopation in duple meters (2/4, 3/4, 4/4, 2/2, etc.).
CHING CHONG WING WONG
Why did I laugh at this.
I understood all of that, and now I'm going to have to watch Animals Do The Most Mediocre Things whilst bashing my head against a wall to bring my Stupid Levels back up. Thanks a lot.
Considering that you used the word "whilst" I think you're gonna need to follow that up with a marathon of Ed Edd & Eddy
My mother purchased a t-shirt at CVS shortly after the advent of 2000. It was hot-pink and had "Have a Happy Millennium!" over wavery treble cleft staves with smiley-faced musical notes. My mother is a class lady.
it takes less work to wear shirt with a slogan that you espouse, as opposed to saying it to everyone you come into contact with.
Better than sportin' a treble cleft palate... Probably better than sporting a singly cleft palate too, when it gets down to it.
Lyle's had that look going on for years.