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Todd has become fat! Wednesday, January 12, 2005 • read strip Viewing 56 comments:

A comment left by asherdan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by zerod, Zefiel, TheSheezie, ocarinak, riotdejaneiro, mikeronomicon, Thorfinn, tttt, NotGodot, DiamondMonster, rudegrrl, magnumt, MortisInvictus, atticusonline, mikerotch6, luckypyjamas, Jeet, lk, chatterjee, regrepsnefpoh, Afkpuz, Zem, genocidefish, Madoushi, Pigs)

Tough crowd.

God, I hope inmates don't screw stomas...

Any port in a storm, matey!

A mouth's a mouth.

Every hole is a goal.

*similar phrase*

Underdog for best Todd strip.

This strip really is so Todd.

What's an eight hundo?

"Course I'm fat! Bein' fat rocks!" is the single most metal thing ever yelled. Ever.

i will incorporate this in the next song i write. i will list achewood in the thanks section of the cd i put the song on. scout's honor.

alt text: Todd became fat in prison.

since i had to look it up myself:

sto·ma [stoh-muh]

1. Botany. any of various small apertures, esp. one of the minute orifices or slits in the epidermis of leaves, stems, etc., through which gases are exchanged.

2. Zoology. a mouth or ingestive opening, esp. when in the form of a small or simple aperture.

3. Medicine/Medical. an artificial opening between two hollow organs or between one hollow organ and the outside of the body, constructed to permit the passage of body fluids or waste products.

i'm guessing #2 is the relevant one. maybe #3. they're all bad to screw, really.

Teodor, unfortunately, is almost certainly referring to definition #3, probably those created through tracheotomy. *shudder*

Nah, tracheal stomae are far too small and full of rigid tissue that would lacerate the intruding cock. A colostomy stoma on the other hand...

It's debates like this that make me wonder if fan culture is necessarily a good thing.

'Shank 'em if ya got 'em, fellas!' takes a u-turn for the worst.

Did the same goddamn thing, djwhiterabbit. We are brothers in our sorrow.

How do you know a robot's ass is bad?

WHY FIND OUT?

ROBOT ASS!!!!!

it just looks like this

You're why we can't have good things.

Todd, to me, sounds like Dale's burnt-out cousin.

"snotcock" is such a winning word

I agree. One doesn't just stumble upon "snotcock" by mere accident. One has to meditate deeply and choose carefully.

this type of meditation requires a bottle of cheap bourbon and maybe some cocaine
i am meditating right now

Do not forget the R. Kelly albums.

Spelled backwards, "kcoctons."

I guess Todd hasn't been doin' all that much f-f-fuckin' lately.

Squirrel-sized eight hundos....

Todd has wicked fat sack

Teodor is curious about the screwing habits of inmates.

Because of the Badass Games we now know that if Teodor ever goes to prison his asshole and any stomas he might have are doomed.

snot-cock = win

There's probably a different explanation for this, but I think that Theodore should know that the plural of 'stoma' is 'stomata'.
I'm gonna get crucified for sying that...

You say "stomato", I say "stomata". Let's call the whole thing off.

The plural of "stoma" is "stomata".

Like Todd gives a shit, snot-cock!

I say sto-ma-ta, you say sto-ma-tah.

I think the one thing EVERYONE can agree on is that no one says "po-tah-to"

I'm confused. How did Todd get out of Hell again?

Todd is back and forth so often, it no longer requires explanation.

He had to answer a riddle which he initially couldn't solve. He probably had to go on an enlightening spiritual journey to learn the answer, which would've been great had the riddle not been 'If you're in a race and you pass the guy in second place, what place are you now in?'

If you exchange each appearance of "Todd" in the text with "Oprah", this strip is even funnier.

Also true of: https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua6tXjtV

"snot cock" *snicker*

Teodor knows fat when he sees it. His own penis, he's less familiar with...
Hey, I can joke about these things! I was hyperobese until I stopped putting olives on the Sub, now I'm twelve stone!

but olives are the best, i could not part with them

I'm still befuddled as to how Todd escaped Hell after failing to correctly answer his riddle ...

i'm sure he eventually figured it out

oh man i thought the last strip was a one off gag. but he stuck with it. bravo, onstad.

oh man i thought the last strip was a one off gag. but he stuck with it. bravo, onstad.

Fat Todd makes my heart smile.