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Too Depressed to Grocery Shop Friday, February 2, 2007 • read strip Viewing 137 comments:

Too true, Mr. Kazenzakis.

A comment left by pogo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ReNeilssance, instantkarma, Telescreen, Broahsaurus, businesstime, ActualTaunt, brotherbrian, grammarian, thefossor)

I'm bipolar, and you're right; there is a major difference. I've tried to find a better word for the sad feeling a cheerleader gets when the quarterback cheats on her with that defensive lineman with the cute cleats, but it's a tough row.

For me, anyway, depression isn't feeling sad. It's just not feeling . When you don't feel anything, doing anything is almost impossible.

Also, the laming of your post was clearly done by assholes.

DC

A comment left by pogo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by NYU, Telescreen, Feaudo, brotherbrian)

A comment left by daedala_x was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by freakscene, riotdejaneiro, Mangtastic, sevenarts, panopticism, TonyHighwind, fakedaisies, Brosaurus, Ravigotte, eRiUukFJk, Boredom_Man, Sock, Rakadin)

Well, it's a lot more complicated than that, I'm afraid. We battle all diseases, don't we? They always say that about people with cancer, for instance, that they fought it. We stuggle with our conditions, sometimes winning, sometimes losing. I now understand it so much better, recognize the early symptoms, have found some chemical relief, and most of all, learned to love myself as I am.

Love yourself, hug your neighbor. Cheer them up when they walk through the valley of shadows.

Huuuuuugs!

Hug the fuck out of em!

So I had commented in an unspectacular manner a while back because this strip resonated with me. I come back to it later and see that there's this whole discussion about disease that I totally missed the first time 'round.

Reading pogo's posts makes me feel kind of happy. I'm not depressed, per se, but I have a fairly severe case of social anxiety which occasionally drags a bout of depression along with it (you get moody if you realize you're terrified of going to the grocery store because PEOPLE are there). My friends--I love them with all my heart--don't have any social anxiety, and therefore have trouble understanding. Regularly I get comments to "suck it up," or "I was shy too once, I learned to break free." Reading comments from people who understand how it all works is a bit refreshing.

I'm currently trying to find a good psychiatrist near my new apartment that I can dump my health insurance money into. But this is hard because it involves setting up appointments with people I don't know.

Cheers, though. To everybody.

i just recently found out that one of my friends has social anxiety. yesterday we were in a store and i guess he wasn't following me so we kinda got separated until i stepped outside and found him sitting on a bench all, "you left me."

i felt bad. i knew he had this problem but i thought he saw where i went.

i do not know where i was going with this. i guess just to say that i understand. also that i am pretty glad i don't have to deal with it personally.

'i felt bad'...

hello, i am five years old and wish to commit suicide.

A chubby for a fellow soldier in the social anxiety battle. Medicine has helped me so much, it's incomprehensible. But once you lose the anxiety, it kind of changes who you used to be, and that will be alarming to some people. Be prepared for this if you choose this route.

"I'm currently trying to find a good psychiatrist near my new apartment that I can dump my health insurance money into. But this is hard because it involves setting up appointments with people I don't know."

So did you do it yet.

I haven't. :/

I have social anxiety, too. I know what it's like trying to get shit done so you can talk with someone about it, it's tough, but it's so worth it once you finally get it done. Cognitive therapy is just as important as medication, if not more so. I wish I had some tips or something but I'm just as stuck as you are.

Go, go Pogo!

i use chemicals to treat my chronic depression, as well. ive come to the realization that its a very self-centering condition. and on top of that, its irrational. you know, in your head, that everything is important. you know that it doesnt matter how awesome you are, you really need to take a shower and change your clothes. you know that just because your long-distance friend didnt call you on your birthday doesnt mean that youre a decroded piece of crap. you know all this stuff, but you cant act on it. you dont care. youre too lame for any of your efforts to come to fruition.

it causes one to be fixated on ones own self(insecurities, etc...), rather than others. and i dont want to discount healthy pride and self-esteem, but looking outside ones self for contentment is quite important. go volunteer at the hospital and fluff pillows for the terminally-ill children(or whatever, but you know what i mean...). then youll see that you dont have as much of a suckfest.

also, i think that those of us with spiritual leanings have an advantage(that whole perpetual hope and eternal perspective thing...).

somethign else just occurred to me: a critter, specifically, a dog. who isnt a dog always happy to see? a good way to battle 'the blues' is a co-dependant pet.

clearly i was depressed yesterday, being all hell of serious. achewood don't need this shit, my apologies.

GUINEA PIGS!!! <3<3<3

Heh, Guinea pigs are pretty good.

[IMGS OFF]

that is no pig. i wouldnt eat that things belly with my scrambled eggs....

You would if you lived in Ecuador. mmmm...all spit-roasted...

0_o

While you're depressed, it feels pretty fucking serious.

I think it's just that those of us who aren't clinically depressed or bipolar can't really understand it. My friend and roommate is depressed/bipolar and while I try to be sympathetic and understanding, there's only a certain point that I can get to, since when I get bummed out I can have a few beers or listen to some rockin' tunes and feel better. Or, alternatively, have a few beers and listen to Tom Waits and then wake up okay the next morning. So when my roommate says that she's depressed, I have a hard time not thinking "well...maybe try not taking shit so seriously" even though I know from a logical/factual perspective that it's nothing like that at all.

At least you have an open mind on the whole depression thing. (As a guy, I also have to ask if your roomie/friend is easy when she's blue.)

No, she's even more anti-sex than when she's in a good mood.

manias, on the other hand...

I like the stance on not being able to 'get' it and I think it's true, but how the ass do you listen to Tom Waits and feel better?

You misunderstand. I feel better the day after drinking and listening to Tom Waits, because everything else seems much less depressing by comparison.

This chubby means I understand completely.

One time I got in a mood, drove out to the store at midnight listening to Bone Machine, bought some steaks and ate them raw. I can't remember if I had the alcohols at the same time but after a certain point booze starts to seem redundant. I suppose the fact I was able to get to the store and buy things implies that it wasn't depression of the Roast Beef sort, but it was some kind of fucked up and I'm glad I don't feel that way now.

This is true. To say one has depression is to implicitly cede that it is entirely beyond one's control. While a lot of people do have the mental illness brand of depression where there's very little they or anyone else can do about it at times, I think you're right about the aggregate.

A good number of those who would say they "got" depression are the ones who do not have any sort of uncontrollable depression but who are choosing to cede their responsibility for their own countenance to some other quasi-godly source, or the fickle hand of fate. I should know. I sort of did that, in weaker years. It was not my finest hour.

Anyway. I really like finding these sorts of comments in the archives on this run-through. They make reading Assetbar all the more worth it, even if they get a bit humdrum now and again. Thanks, Pogo.

You're welcome.

Dear Mr. Pogo,
I don't think being serious was out of place; I spend a lot of my life fighting off depression. I more or less keep it at bay, until a the days come when I can't say "I love you" because of how much it hurts.
You're my favorite Assetbar poster; I hope I'm not being presumptuous when I say that I think you're a kindred spirit.
Formally yours,
actualtaunt

Whereas he annoys me due to his ridiculous hypocrisy and double-standards... and yet I haven't lamed a single thing he has said here. Why? Who knows. Maybe because I'm a bitter, viciously pessimistic sod who views depression as inevitable and life as it ought not be.
I guess thus far I just chose to stay out of this communal whine-fest instead.

Shakespeare said it best:
"Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

As someone who (is depressed/suffers from depression/has depression/just feels really bad for weeks at a time), I would chubby this whole exchange, if I could.

I am APPALLED that I gave this a lame. Jesus Christ.


I don't think I like that.

anhedonia is a lot more than just being sad and is sometimes difficult to understand for those who are sometimes down but consistently working towards their own happiness.
feels like... you know what sort of things you want to do, what could make you happy, but you have absolutely no motivation to pursue these ends. an overwhelming hopelessness... beef would very much like to go to the store, but just can't bring himself to do something that could make him happy because, in the end, what's the point really?

also this was my first strip; i think my brother thought i was amusingly beef-like.

I feel ya - been there, done that. Don't ever want it to get that bad again!

I think the fact that Roast Beef "has" depression is actually a way of saying it is a disease that sticks with him. It's been something he's dealt with all his life, and it has kinda become part of him. Very deterministic, especially if he was real, but he isn't and I think that makes it ok, if fairly sad.

A comment left by heatbag was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lamboyster, sharksarecoming, ohmygooses, the_dingle, logic, hausea)

i had to walk out of whole foods once because i couldn't stand the atmosphere and all the hipster yuppies shopping around me. i immediately thought of this strip, and wondered if it meant i had depression. but then i realized that i just hated whole foods.

A comment left by overmedicated was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by kylank, unquotable, the_dingle, Methadone, wehavemagnums)

A comment left by overmedicated was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Pseudochron, ohmygooses, unquotable)

Apparently, issues are lame.

I wanted to give this comment a low rating until I realized I was just pissed off at how accurate it is. So, five.

Excuse me: Not the comment, but the strip. Though the comment is pretty accurate too.

Which causes lames to be issued.

A comment left by saint was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by fosters, ticketyboo, ohmygooses, mediumrare, Jewpacabra)

Man, you got lamed to the default threshold for that. Damn. Calling out the little turds was a bad idea.

Chubby for caring about the lames.

So the reason I hate you so much is just because I don't understand your posts?

rowboat hates saint. hates him to hell.

there you go, making assumptions.

when you make assumptions, you make an ass of you and mumptions.

Man I'm sorry. That is unfair-like treatment.

Maybe it wasn't for having issues but because your comment was basically a 'yea me too' kind of deal that didn't really add anything? I mean I don't personally think it should have been lamed or anything, that just seems like the most likely explanation.

A comment left by eric was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lamboyster, extortshorties, kharitonov)

A comment left by theloneliestmonkey was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by apocowarg, lamboyster, kylank, sharksarecoming, Interestingname)

A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by pwb, TonyHighwind, extortshorties)

It's the last two panels with Emeril and Spongebath that make this strip for me.

It really shows their caring nature. Cool cats they most definitely are.

Emeril and Spongebath need to be used more.

At first I thought there might be some Satanic message in Panel 7 that only the severly depressed could see. (Cause the "D" is kinda bold looking)

I think the light is busted on that particular letter.

Di Rite
It's pretty obvious... if you're depressed enough

Whoa...

Which clearly RB is

never would of noticed that, kudos!

Oh dammit, it's the FedEx arrow of Achewood.

A comment left by nicklon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by 7th_shot, extortshorties, luckypyjamas, logic)

woah. woah? not sure if that means anything or not, but woah nonetheless.

This is like the biggest joke in the strip, and it COMPLETELY escaped me. Good work, gumshoe.

Yeah, I didn't notice that until I read this strip now, in my current state. The check mark almost makes it seem like dying is on the list of things you are expected to do, and then you say "Right, got it, I'll get to that immediately."

I never noticed the blood dripping from the sign until your comment made me go back and look at the "D" closely.

I figured it for just being grime and rust stains, such like you would get on a poorly maintained sign. All decaying and lonely and uncared for, dragged low by total entropy.

i agree with this. i really don't think that's blood...

Ugh, entropy...But yeah, I think that's just in Beef's mind, since the sign looks fine in the other panels.

It wasn't shown in clear detail in the other panels.

The sign probably looks like that, it's just that when you've got depression, that's the part that stands out to you. It embodies the horribleness of the sign and the store and everything about the whole affair. Wordlessly, Onstad perfectly conveys the whole concept of not being able to go places because of depression.

This used to happen to me

Absolutely, nail on the head wonderful. I guess the point is, you're not depressed forever.

we all have days like this

For some of us, every day is like this. :(

an assetbar chubby is like a hug.

Philippe is so emotive in this. One of the subtle things I love about this one.

7 of 10 Achewood readers have got depression.

also they are the guys who suck.

A comment left by soticoto was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by worldbelow, atticusonline, luckypyjamas)

Oh my gosh. The seventh panel? How could you NOT be too depressed to enter that store?

Panel 7 is the cornerstone upon which this rests.

I lived panels 5 through 10 yesterday but because I left my wallet at home.

I gave you a chubby. Your avatar has returned the favor.

Eeew.

Agreed.

Subtle touch: Teodor is doing some graphic design work.

I do this.

Well, usually I decide I can't make the effort of going to the grocery BEFORE I get out and drive, but not always. And I'm not nearly as bad with it now as I used to be.

Damn, forgot to set pro.

I can usually make it inside the grocery store, but then I get in front of the shampoos and there are just way too many choices and it all becomes - yeah.

phil is lookin all hella sassy in panel one

Yet also very understanding in panel 4. When I feel down, I often think I'd want a small five-year-old otter to understand. It comforts me.

Alt text refers to this strip.

oh man this is totally what its like man its like hes been me when i have to go to the grocery.

sometimes i feel really good about myself when i can get myself to go to the store and then i just stand there and i cant go in.

when hunger and depression battle, no one wins.

I appreciate the artful glimpse into depression's heart. But I'm a narcissistic chucklehead, and I 5'd the strip mostly because I had a car that churkita-vroomed JUST THAT WAY.

I like your honesty. Also the word chucklehead makes me giggle.

man why you even got to do a thing

I have rated this strip a "5," but a part of me wants
to rate it based on Beef's actual mood in the strip, since the little ratings buttons are his face. In that case, this strip would be a -3.

I signed up just so I could comment on this
Roast beef holding his head in his hands in panel 9 warrants giving this a five

Onstad knows depression. Massively pro just because he doesn't glamourise it.

Whenever i try and explain social anxiety disorder, this is where i go.

I have shown people Achewood to explain what it feels like to have depression. Onstad does a better job of explaining than I can.

Its not funny that I can relate to this.

i am sad because im not getting it

what is he seeing in panel 7

Just the rot and decay, the rust trailing down off the metal lettering, the flaky cheap paint. I don't suffer from depression as far as I know, but I still have days where I look at storefronts and just see feeble desperation.

The futility of life.

It is worse when you actually work there, because going in means even more bad things, like having to tell people are you having a good day and get yelled at about milk, but you know you have to go in or else your pretty boss will be Disappointed in you and you will be maybe fired.

this has happened to me. also, i had no job.

Panel 7 captures the feeling we may get when the ugly, crass, dirty side of the world seeps through our facade of modern living. When you're depressed it really shines through.

Plus he's got depression.

I thought of this strip when Britney Spears couldn't go into the courthouse.

Clearly she has depression.

I have depression and I endorse this strip. It is an accurate and succinct explanation of a thing. People who go around telling other, sadder people to Cheer Up should read this strip, and then feel bad for failing to be nice.

chubbed because this group hug still doesn't feel awkward

Obligatory "this was my first achewood" post.

A friend of mine is the dude who sucks/has depression, and he used this to explain. What a wonderful tool, Onstad, creating empathy between depressives 'n stuff.

I'm gonna go off on my own and admit that depression has never effected me to this extent. Now, I used to get crazily depressed, and all, but not to the point of actually hightailin' it outta there like that.

This does, however, pretty amazingly sum up my experience with bad acid trips. I mean, it's just identical to this. You just see the filth and the rot on every little thing you encounter and you just gotta go.

I don't do acid anymore. And I don't get too depressed anymore now that I've figured out that nothing can possibly matter, ever.


I understand this.

emeril shakes his had sadly, knowingly.

also, is that the '78 Galaxie? i fucking love that car...

It is so true

I have been here. It is almost painful to read this strip.

Handicheckrite? I wouldn't shop there either.

I was hell of reminded of this strip the other day when i had trouble returning a library book. i <3 beef.

there have been times that I have not eaten for more than a day because I could not motivate myself to leave my building and go to the grocery store around the corner.

there have also been times when I have not eaten for more than a day because I went to the library and tried to read all the back issues of the American Journal of Mathematics from this decade.

It cuts both ways, it what I'm saying.

This was my first Achewood strip from small times ago. I didn't start reading until recently, though.







I wish I had interesting problems.