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John and Deanster Thursday, April 1, 2004 • read strip Viewing 85 comments:

jesus

This remains my favorite first post ever.

Indeed. It will never have enough chubbies.

especially cuz the old man doesn't look shocked, just disappointed

The old man is Leonid Breshnev, one-time leader of the Soviet Union.

Personally, my favorite first post is here ; I bring this up becaues it's also by okl, the poster above.

Oddly enough, a lot of people seem to really dislike it, but I think it fits the comic and the stoic Breshnev avatar even better.

This is my all-time single favorite strip.

This strip's one of my favourites too, but it's only good if you've read the rest.

I concur. This strip perfectly encapsulates the sort of horrible, anxious dreams I have when I get nasty drunk and have horrible sleep. All tossing and turning and grinding my teeth in my sleep, dreaming about punching my friends and getting insulted and seeing children get run over by cars.

I laughed so hard the first few hundred times that I looked at this strip, and I'm still laughing right now.

A comment left by jstegall was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Jesler729, Boxus, aperson)

Seconded. A year later.

Thirded. Another year later.

Numbers. Two weeks later.

Curiously, Ray has testicles. Has he discovered Neuticles?

Oh god my mutilated html is flopping out everywhere this is just .. ruuuuuude ...

One of the "Most Asked Questions About: Neutering With NEUTICLES"-- is this real ?

Neuticles not only replicate the pet's testicles in size, shape weight and feel - but the new UltraPLUS featuring ScarRetard has features not available on human implants. Yes- Neuticles are that advanced!

Neuticles! What news from the North?

Not to be a guy that checks out a cartoon cat's junk, but he is remarkably well groomed in his area.

Yes, JohnRay sports suspiciously merkinesque coiffure.

They don't have to take the original nads out to sterilize a fellow.

Since he's gotten his rut on since we've seen that poster, I'm pretty sure it was in error.

Wasn't that poster actually about that weepy dog by the same name, and not Ray?

Man, it was only a vasectomy

Good catch.

I actually called the number listed on the site, before they had a toll-free, and I think I spoke with the founder... I asked him if he was serious, and he said yes, and then I asked him if he got asked that a lot. And then he told me to 'fuck off' and hung up. True story.

So... I guess that's a yes.

Oy...I found Waldo

Best April Fools ever, bar none.

I would love to see more of these.

THIS COMIC

HOLY SHIT

THESE KNIVES!

I laughed more at this comment than the actual comic.

You should go back and re-read the comic because you didn't read it right the first time!

beef, er, deanster in that wheelchair reminds me of this:
link link

the wheelchair is for political correctness

Have I been giving 5s to all the strips featuring cat dong? If I have, it's because they deserve it.

I've probably seen this strip ten times, and I didn't even notice the cat cock until I read this comment. Wow.

A comment left by centipede_damascus was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by fakead, odei, cavebaby, Connellingus, farqussus, Breadcrab, hellofditties)

I love it when people quote the alt text and people give them hell of chubbies for quoting the alt text whether or not they know the person is totally cramping the alt text's style without givin' it credit.

I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin.

I can find no explanation of 'John and Deanster' anywhere on the internet, but the cat cack is just great.

That comment is google's #1 result for "John and Deanster".

ahahah you put a green background on your avatar aren't you just the cutest thing

This is why Ray wears his thong in bed.

This one's sort of a non-sequitar, even by Achewood standards.

I think I know why they won't syndicate this one...

Ray's medalion is too gawdy for the newspaper audience

A comment left by gormster was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Contrasoma, VandenBos, DR_MANFLESH_DESIRES_ANAL_PLAY_IMMEDIATELY, madnes, apocowarg, fakead, daidai, dangelder, riotdejaneiro, jstegall, Dezufnocosem, Unfun, bearattack, Jesler729, GeyserShitdick, dennycrane, Spenham, d3lvn, Severide, jollysaintpete, Semiquaver, SkiddyFisk, michellemarie, proof_man, Axhoola, smugairle, unityrolf, fakedaisies, fmercury, aHatOfPig, Afronaut, Warren, YossarianLives, biznart, Tragic_Johnson, nutmeg, Jewpacabra, MrPoopytime, joebot, lazarusloafer, anitrophaeron, clintisiceman, ibetso, stormagnet, Panserbjorne, fieryjack, slalvation, gkiyo, STUART, morbo)

Can I have your email address? I need to know whether some other things are funny.

Chubbied for being hella cool.

ohhhh yes.

Chubbied for reply AND Jawbreaker avatar username.

Well, you were right about one thing!

The best achewood.

wait.. what?

HAHAHAHAHAH!

It's the alt text that does it for me.

Mostly because I honestly didn't notice the cat junk until after I read it.

Then... I broke.

CAT COCK

ROCK FLACCID

Like it or not, you like it.

WHAT THE FUCK

A comment left by nbgreene was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by equinn2006, rascaldom, Vreeeee, Zem, lateadopter)

looks like beef has to be wheel chair bound in order for Achewood to get syndicated

The alt text really makes this one.

alarm cock factory

that sounds like a Lyle startup business

or under certain circumstances, a Teodor one
i.e. Circus Penis in Alarm Cock Factory

I fondly look back at this post, remembering how I got ten chubs for it

This was my magnum opus

Somehow I had missed this comic. My life had been less than complete.

what a ridiculous scene. humorous. FOUR'D!

don't get the john/deanster reference, but i laughed my damn ass off.

I think they're just generic names which seem suited to many syndicated strips.

I feel amusement and confusion. It's like a Japanese noise-rock song in comic form... there's familiar parts in there, but they're just passing by inside the blender.

The irony!

Wait, if John just woke up, shouldn't his member be stiff from needing to pee?

This was a thinly veiled attempt to try to get more ROCK HARD cat cock into this comic.

We're on to you, tekende.

3 months later, Onstad answers this query: Yes.

That is bear boner, not cat cock, and you know it.

EVERYONE STOP TALKING ABOUT ANIMAL DICKS

FUCK

I feel sorry for the people who don't know about Alt-text. This strip is just a dud without that extra punchline.

Holy shit I never realized that the alt-text was in reference to the comic, and thus funny. I thought Onstad was just expressing things happening concurrently in his life.

the wheelchair is my favorite part of this comic.
this cartoon I saw once that I just thought was a fever induced thing but it is REAL and he is in a REALCHAIR

oh flarkish, i forgot the biggest LOL about that cartoon! The creator of it is "John Callahan", and he'd be funny if, like this strip, he was mocking humor like this. He's not.

[IMGS OFF]
yeah luckily no kids actually watched "Pelswick" or else they'd google across his other junk.
I wonder if the wheelchair is included to reference this horrible man's terrible comics.

Hey, I think Callahan is great. I have two of his books. He takes risks and I enjoy his sense of humor.

i think you're wrong about this one. but maybe the google image search of his work just shows the absolute worst of it.


CALAHAAN IS THE SHIT FUCK HATERZ

This seems so familiar...

this is so incredibly awesome. it´s beyond words