sagoon
+1 -0
Ms. Lady will be upset and have an acid tummy all night.
Ms. Lady will be upset and have an acid tummy all night.
likeiwassaying
+2 -0
Percoset is a drug. You can OD on many drugs you take because you cannot go outside today.
Percoset is a drug. You can OD on many drugs you take because you cannot go outside today.
lawbot
+0 -0
I will be copying this for my own wedding.
I will be copying this for my own wedding.
hbaranov
+0 -0
I do not know about the entire thing, but I will certainly steal the format, especially Best/Worst/Old/Young man.
I do not know about the entire thing, but I will certainly steal the format, especially Best/Worst/Old/Young man.
professorhazard
+0 -0
Will one of your least masculine male friends suffer the indignity of being the Maid of Honor?
Have you already got him in mind?
Will one of your least masculine male friends suffer the indignity of being the Maid of Honor?
Have you already got him in mind?
hbaranov
+0 -0
Secret.
Secret.
maximus
+0 -0
And the big paragraph mark like a logo at the top of the cover. At least he didn't use that silly default logo that comes with MS Ofiice
And the big paragraph mark like a logo at the top of the cover. At least he didn't use that silly default logo that comes with MS Ofiice
maximus
+3 -0
hbaranov
+0 -0
I have seen that on the side of van in my hometown. The people are that thick that small business men used the default MS logo thingy for their actual logo. Dear god, I am so glad I will be out of here in 6 months.
I have seen that on the side of van in my hometown. The people are that thick that small business men used the default MS logo thingy for their actual logo. Dear god, I am so glad I will be out of here in 6 months.
irondave
+0 -0
That looks really sweet with your black helicopter Airwolf icotar hover next to it.
That looks really sweet with your black helicopter Airwolf icotar hover next to it.
professorhazard
+0 -0
This is a game that poor kids play at the library
This is a game that poor kids play at the library
hamscout
+8 -0
(you might have to 'open in new window' to get the last panel)
(you might have to 'open in new window' to get the last panel)
odei
+0 -0
Sweet chubbies!
Also I feel this new avatar is much stronger.
Sweet chubbies!
Also I feel this new avatar is much stronger.
sdskyle
+0 -0
NOOOO I RAN OUT OF CHUBBIES!!
NOOOO I RAN OUT OF CHUBBIES!!
octafish
+1 -0
Man, its the weekend, you shouldn't bee so premature with your chubbies. Dip your toe in some ice water just before you think your going to chubby, think about sports, a... a kid hits a terrible baseball shot in the big game.
You got to know when to hold em, know when to chub em,
Know when to walk away and know when to lame.
You never count your chubbs when you're sittin' at the 'puter.
There'll be time enough for countin' when the postin's done.
Man, its the weekend, you shouldn't bee so premature with your chubbies. Dip your toe in some ice water just before you think your going to chubby, think about sports, a... a kid hits a terrible baseball shot in the big game.
You got to know when to hold em, know when to chub em,
Know when to walk away and know when to lame.
You never count your chubbs when you're sittin' at the 'puter.
There'll be time enough for countin' when the postin's done.
cromar
+0 -0
I WISHA HAD A CHUBBY 4 YUUUUUUU
I WISHA HAD A CHUBBY 4 YUUUUUUU
achilleselbow
+1 -0
If I could find a girl who would agree to a commitment against ever dancing, I would marry her on the spot.
If I could find a girl who would agree to a commitment against ever dancing, I would marry her on the spot.
spinynorman
+16 -0
I don't have a problem dancing. Other people do. According to onlookers it's like "an epileptic vomiting and being shot, simultaneously, but with karate".
Fuck you bitches, I'm beautiful
I don't have a problem dancing. Other people do. According to onlookers it's like "an epileptic vomiting and being shot, simultaneously, but with karate".
Fuck you bitches, I'm beautiful
cromar
+1 -0
Dancing is the bee's knees.
Dancing is the bee's knees.
theescapist
+0 -0
I ran out of chubbies... And this easily trumps any of the previous comments I gave them to.
I ran out of chubbies... And this easily trumps any of the previous comments I gave them to.
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
Are you named after a meta-super hero in The amazing adventures of kavalier and clay?
Are you named after a meta-super hero in The amazing adventures of kavalier and clay?
falseprophet
+0 -0
Also, is your avataricon from Blade of the Immortal ?
Also, is your avataricon from Blade of the Immortal ?
loneal
+0 -0
You have clearly never dated a dancer.
You have clearly never dated a dancer.
pogo
+0 -0
Right on, sister Dancing Queen. Being lead around the dancefloor by a woman who knows how to move is heavenly.
Right on, sister Dancing Queen. Being lead around the dancefloor by a woman who knows how to move is heavenly.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
By "dancer," do you mean a euphemism for a woman who works at a place of ill repute uses for her profession, or one of those studio people who prances around in a leotard? In either case, you're right.
By "dancer," do you mean a euphemism for a woman who works at a place of ill repute uses for her profession, or one of those studio people who prances around in a leotard? In either case, you're right.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
You could say that using unnecessarily complex syntax and going back to edit parts of my sentences is my hamartia.
You could say that using unnecessarily complex syntax and going back to edit parts of my sentences is my hamartia.
loneal
+0 -0
Strippers and ballerinas have separate but related qualities that make them recommendable for dating. (I was a ballerina for the majority of my life. I will leave it at that.)
Strippers and ballerinas have separate but related qualities that make them recommendable for dating. (I was a ballerina for the majority of my life. I will leave it at that.)
tekende
+0 -0
I can't really think of anything recommendable about dating a stripper, other than the fact that she's likely to be good-looking.
I am not speaking from personal experience, mind.
I can't really think of anything recommendable about dating a stripper, other than the fact that she's likely to be good-looking.
I am not speaking from personal experience, mind.
zapatos
+0 -0
I am, and she wasn't too bad to look at.
I am, and she wasn't too bad to look at.
octafish
+0 -2
Whoa, huge slam on Graphic Designers out of nowhere!
Whoa, huge slam on Graphic Designers out of nowhere!
hbaranov
+0 -0
Considering the success with the card business. Indeed, it is not so much out of nowhere, as just Roast Beef having SOME self-esteem for once.
Considering the success with the card business. Indeed, it is not so much out of nowhere, as just Roast Beef having SOME self-esteem for once.
squares
+0 -1
First of all it's not out of nowhere, Beef's been referring to his graphic design skills here and there for a while now, and secondly, this isn't anything close to a 'huge slam'.
First of all it's not out of nowhere, Beef's been referring to his graphic design skills here and there for a while now, and secondly, this isn't anything close to a 'huge slam'.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Damnit, I said that three hours before you did. Take your MSPaint fox avatar and depart from mine sight.
Damnit, I said that three hours before you did. Take your MSPaint fox avatar and depart from mine sight.
squares
+0 -0
is actually msn messenger drawing. glad you recognized the fox.
is actually msn messenger drawing. glad you recognized the fox.
hbaranov
+1 -1
DEPART DEPART!!! *convulses with apoplexy*
DEPART DEPART!!! *convulses with apoplexy*
steev_dayv
+0 -0
Whoa, huge slam on octafish out of nowhere!
I digg the refrence octafish. Keep it up.
Whoa, huge slam on octafish out of nowhere!
I digg the refrence octafish. Keep it up.
terebikun
+1 -0
It's okay octafish, I got it. together with steev_dayv, that's 2 for 2!
It's okay octafish, I got it. together with steev_dayv, that's 2 for 2!
autrepoupee
+0 -0
A comment left by autrepoupee was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, waddie, hbaranov)
A comment left by autrepoupee was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, waddie, hbaranov)
autrepoupee
+0 -0
lamed within the minute
I guess that teaches me to post without my flaximax/ hopeugrin cocktail in gullet.
lamed within the minute
I guess that teaches me to post without my flaximax/ hopeugrin cocktail in gullet.
i_love_kate
+8 -0
Does flaximax sound to anyone else like something you'd take to cancel out the effects of viagra?
Does flaximax sound to anyone else like something you'd take to cancel out the effects of viagra?
pyromancer
+0 -0
How could this not already have a chub?
How could this not already have a chub?
autrepoupee
+0 -0
haha, it's from Tom Goes to the Mayor.
I barely remember posting this, though. I think I was asleep.
haha, it's from Tom Goes to the Mayor.
I barely remember posting this, though. I think I was asleep.
terebikun
+0 -0
Oh my god, someone else who posts with Tom Goes To The Mayor references. Let's run away together.
Oh my god, someone else who posts with Tom Goes To The Mayor references. Let's run away together.
professorhazard
+0 -0
Let's all go to Pipe's Buffet, on me.
Let's all go to Pipe's Buffet, on me.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
We're a rare breed, friends. Crabapples like us, we gotta stick together.
We're a rare breed, friends. Crabapples like us, we gotta stick together.
octafish
+1 -0
Ahem.
-Gloomy Sunday AKA the Hungarian Suicide Song by Billie Holiday.
-The River by The Boss
-and I'll give you Cat's in the Cradle.
Maybe we just have more golden goldies stations in Melbourne?
Ahem.
-Gloomy Sunday AKA the Hungarian Suicide Song by Billie Holiday.
-The River by The Boss
-and I'll give you Cat's in the Cradle.
Maybe we just have more golden goldies stations in Melbourne?
hardelicious
+0 -0
ahem. Suicide is Painless by Johnny Mandel
AKA the M*A*S*H theme song.
ahem. Suicide is Painless by Johnny Mandel
AKA the M*A*S*H theme song.
octafish
+0 -0
Yeah I forgot Old Blue that song fuckin' destroys me.
Yeah I forgot Old Blue that song fuckin' destroys me.
professorhazard
+0 -0
The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald
The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald
invidious
+0 -0
Stayin' Alive
Makes me tear up every time.
Stayin' Alive
Makes me tear up every time.
catgrl131
+0 -0
Mother's Little Helper . I cried the first time I heard it.
Mother's Little Helper . I cried the first time I heard it.
catgrl131
+0 -0
Also, Artificial Flowers by Bobby Darin.
Also, Artificial Flowers by Bobby Darin.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
the one that one flash music video on ABS is about?
all about that girl makin'..artificial flowers? dang.
the one that one flash music video on ABS is about?
all about that girl makin'..artificial flowers? dang.
catgrl131
+0 -0
Yeah. I heard the song first, though, so the animation just made it extra-sad. //_-) <-Emo, emo me.
Yeah. I heard the song first, though, so the animation just made it extra-sad. //_-) <-Emo, emo me.
irondave
+0 -0
Thanks a lot. My cousin was lost on the Edmund Fitzgerald. They almost made Whitefish Bay.
Thanks a lot. My cousin was lost on the Edmund Fitzgerald. They almost made Whitefish Bay.
professorhazard
+0 -0
Don't joke about that. I carry a load of iron ore twenty-six thousand tons more than the Professor Hazard weighs empty.
Don't joke about that. I carry a load of iron ore twenty-six thousand tons more than the Professor Hazard weighs empty.
nbgreene
+0 -0
not funny professorhazard. i know of a guy from an internet post who's cousin was lost on the edmund fitzgerald. you are SO insensitive.
also, i'm pretty sure gordon lightfoot is dead you fuck.
not funny professorhazard. i know of a guy from an internet post who's cousin was lost on the edmund fitzgerald. you are SO insensitive.
also, i'm pretty sure gordon lightfoot is dead you fuck.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Nope. Not dead.
Nope. Not dead.
achilleselbow
+8 -0
maximus
+0 -0
That is one of my favorite Spamusements. Too bad it was a guest strip.
That is one of my favorite Spamusements. Too bad it was a guest strip.
duskbringer
+0 -0
What's wrong with Spamusement guest strips? They're all that's left! OH GOD WHY DID HE ABANDON US
What's wrong with Spamusement guest strips? They're all that's left! OH GOD WHY DID HE ABANDON US
ortsac
+0 -0
This post is brought to you by the lazy people:
the caption is HELLO ME NOT DEAD
This post is brought to you by the lazy people:
the caption is HELLO ME NOT DEAD
maximus
+0 -0
Richard! I've never seen you so - happy.
Richard! I've never seen you so - happy.
hbaranov
+0 -0
I know a guy whose Uncle punched Steven Hawking. Oooo burn
I know a guy whose Uncle punched Steven Hawking. Oooo burn
professorhazard
+0 -0
You could run up and kick him in the knee!
You could run up and kick him in the knee!
catgrl131
+0 -0
Man, Stephen Hawking couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag.
Man, Stephen Hawking couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
oh me oh my
oh me oh my
catgrl131
+0 -0
There are seven grains of rice.
There are seven grains of rice.
hbaranov
+0 -0
This was pre motor neurone incapacitation I believe
This was pre motor neurone incapacitation I believe
autrepoupee
+0 -0
oh man, if either of those songs ever got played on my local stations, there would definitely be an addendum to the list.
oh man, if either of those songs ever got played on my local stations, there would definitely be an addendum to the list.
ethelthefrog
+0 -0
The Dock of the Bay by Otis Redding. I know it's a good song, but it also plunges me into despair whenever I hear it.
The Dock of the Bay by Otis Redding. I know it's a good song, but it also plunges me into despair whenever I hear it.
steerpike66
+2 -0
I want Ian McKellan to read out 'Tainted Love' in granite iambic pentameter at my wedding.
I want Ian McKellan to read out 'Tainted Love' in granite iambic pentameter at my wedding.
straw
+1 -0
"Tainted Love" is not written in iambic pentameter.
"Tainted Love" is not written in iambic pentameter.
andyfaewatford
+1 -0
But Ian McKellen could still read it in iambic pentameter, and it would sound like Shakespeare.
But Ian McKellen could still read it in iambic pentameter, and it would sound like Shakespeare.
hardelicious
+0 -0
Ian McKellan could do it. He's British, and gay. They have special powers, you know.
Ian McKellan could do it. He's British, and gay. They have special powers, you know.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Who? Do you mean the gay Brits or the British gays?
Who? Do you mean the gay Brits or the British gays?
hardelicious
+15 -1
I very insensitively call them "The Britith."
I very insensitively call them "The Britith."
hbaranov
+0 -2
As representative of the British I must say. 'Fuck orf'
Sorry about that, national duty and all. Nothing personal mate.
As representative of the British I must say. 'Fuck orf'
Sorry about that, national duty and all. Nothing personal mate.
hardelicious
+0 -0
If you were also gay, you could use your special powers to make me spill my coffee on myself. I guess, sir, that you are no Ian McKellen.
If you were also gay, you could use your special powers to make me spill my coffee on myself. I guess, sir, that you are no Ian McKellen.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Ah, but I'm not, so you'll just have to do it to yourself, if you like hot liquid scalding your lap.
Ah, but I'm not, so you'll just have to do it to yourself, if you like hot liquid scalding your lap.
cbtbone
+0 -0
Whoa, dude, I wish people would just lay off Orff. Carmina Burana is hell of exciting music.
Also: He maybe had some pretty good ideas about teaching music to small children?
Whoa, dude, I wish people would just lay off Orff. Carmina Burana is hell of exciting music.
Also: He maybe had some pretty good ideas about teaching music to small children?
pogo
+0 -0
As Popeye would say, "Orf, orf orf."
As Popeye would say, "Orf, orf orf."
octafish
+1 -0
Sir Ian McKellan. He's a fucking knight, is what he is.
Sir Ian McKellan. He's a fucking knight, is what he is.
hamscout
+3 -0
how do you know?
'e hasn't got shit all over 'im....
how do you know?
'e hasn't got shit all over 'im....
hbaranov
+1 -0
Depends on what play he's in...
Depends on what play he's in...
achilleselbow
+0 -1
Wrong character class. He can neither wear full plate mail nor wield a sword.
Wrong character class. He can neither wear full plate mail nor wield a sword.
cbtbone
+0 -0
LA LA LA FINGERS IN EARS CAN'T HEAR GAMING REFERENCE
LA LA LA FINGERS IN EARS CAN'T HEAR GAMING REFERENCE
duskbringer
+0 -0
https://img248.imageshack.us/img248/4139/ianmckellanek5.jpg
In his latest role, the off-broadway production of a Dr Seuss classic, "Crocs with Socks".
https://img248.imageshack.us/img248/4139/ianmckellanek5.jpg
In his latest role, the off-broadway production of a Dr Seuss classic, "Crocs with Socks".
steerpike66
+0 -0
It will be by the time I'm done with it.
It will be by the time I'm done with it.
kickstart
+0 -0
I'm with you on how "Seasons" is super-depressing, but Ray probably is sincerely thinking "Goodbye my friend, it's hard to die" as he loses Beef to Matrimony. Maybe if he just reads it, it won't be as bad.
I'm with you on how "Seasons" is super-depressing, but Ray probably is sincerely thinking "Goodbye my friend, it's hard to die" as he loses Beef to Matrimony. Maybe if he just reads it, it won't be as bad.
thegoblins
+0 -0
So the formula for a depressing oldies song is that it must be titled ____ in the ____. Is this correct?
So the formula for a depressing oldies song is that it must be titled ____ in the ____. Is this correct?
didymos
+3 -0
Yes.
"Blister in the Sun" and "Farmer in the Dell" always make me cry.
Yes.
"Blister in the Sun" and "Farmer in the Dell" always make me cry.
irondave
+3 -0
Put the Lime in the Coconut
Put the Lime in the Coconut
hamscout
+0 -0
R.O.C.K. in the USA
hella depressing
R.O.C.K. in the USA
hella depressing
falseprophet
+0 -0
Born in the USA even moreso.
Born in the USA even moreso.
lastlarf
+0 -0
That song is what America is all about!
That song is what America is all about!
catgrl131
+0 -0
I ate a hamburger and said Hooray!
I ate a hamburger and said Hooray!
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
"Up the Junction" by Squeeze. Doesn't quite conform to the formula, but man does it get me right... there.
*Wells up the very thought of a sad, sad song*
"Up the Junction" by Squeeze. Doesn't quite conform to the formula, but man does it get me right... there.
*Wells up the very thought of a sad, sad song*
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
*There should be an 'at' in there. My typing is a dog's typing today*
*There should be an 'at' in there. My typing is a dog's typing today*
phy
+0 -0
Acceptable in the 80's
Acceptable in the 80's
vermy
+0 -0
Last Kiss by Wayne Cochran deserves honorable mention, despite hell of upbeat tune.
Last Kiss by Wayne Cochran deserves honorable mention, despite hell of upbeat tune.
woodjay
+0 -0
How about having John Cusack and Jack Black just read of top 5 lists of most depressing songs at your wedding?
How about having John Cusack and Jack Black just read of top 5 lists of most depressing songs at your wedding?
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
that is such a Good movie.
that is such a Good movie.
zapatos
+0 -0
Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.
We've known each other since we're nine or ten.
Together we climbed hills or trees.
Learned of love and ABC's,
skinned our hearts and skinned our knees.
Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.
We've known each other since we're nine or ten.
Together we climbed hills or trees.
Learned of love and ABC's,
skinned our hearts and skinned our knees.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i really want to cover this song a la Bright Eyes or something...
i really want to cover this song a la Bright Eyes or something...
flaxplus
+0 -1
I was looking forward to Beef's Rick Astley impression at the reception :(
I was looking forward to Beef's Rick Astley impression at the reception :(
hardelicious
+0 -0
A comment left by hardelicious was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, apocowarg, evolume, andyfaewatford, what42, DanS, nathanielperson, perhapsmaybe)
A comment left by hardelicious was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, apocowarg, evolume, andyfaewatford, what42, DanS, nathanielperson, perhapsmaybe)
alejandroadam
+0 -0
how does this have more lames then chubbies? would someone less hungover and overly friendly than me please fix this..
thanks.
how does this have more lames then chubbies? would someone less hungover and overly friendly than me please fix this..
thanks.
hardelicious
+3 -0
People are angry because Rick Astley allows his voice to misrepresent his physical features (i.e. he looks like the whiniest, most cowardly member of the Dead Poets Society, but sounds like a large black man from Detroit)
People are angry because Rick Astley allows his voice to misrepresent his physical features (i.e. he looks like the whiniest, most cowardly member of the Dead Poets Society, but sounds like a large black man from Detroit)
steerpike66
+0 -0
No he doesn't. he has one of those big fake voices like Ronan Keating or Celine Dion heard underwater.
No he doesn't. he has one of those big fake voices like Ronan Keating or Celine Dion heard underwater.
catgrl131
+1 -0
Wait....was I just RickRolled?
Wait....was I just RickRolled?
gormster
+0 -0
graphically!
graphically!
steerpike66
+0 -0
Jesus, stop reminding me how like an unconvincing store mannequin Rick Astley looked.
Jesus, stop reminding me how like an unconvincing store mannequin Rick Astley looked.
mattylite
+0 -0
This is wonderful. Thank you. And Thank God for making a world where this exists. And thank Jesus for saving that world that one time, when the Devil was gonna break it. And thank the Devil for Rock and Roll music, and also Rick Astley's music. And thank you Rick Astley too. Thank you.
This is wonderful. Thank you. And Thank God for making a world where this exists. And thank Jesus for saving that world that one time, when the Devil was gonna break it. And thank the Devil for Rock and Roll music, and also Rick Astley's music. And thank you Rick Astley too. Thank you.
perilon
+1 -0
Basically, not your standard wedding. Of course, including Todd in the wedding throws all bets off. We'll see how this goes down.
Basically, not your standard wedding. Of course, including Todd in the wedding throws all bets off. We'll see how this goes down.
speccer
+9 -0
Teodor is the maid of honor because he listens to The Cure.
Teodor is the maid of honor because he listens to The Cure.
stereo
+8 -0
Showbiz is going to have a heck of a letdown.
Showbiz is going to have a heck of a letdown.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Not really, I believe Beef made it clear many many times. Especially considering what he promised to do.
I just hope Showbiz gets an invite, or he will be pissed.
Not really, I believe Beef made it clear many many times. Especially considering what he promised to do.
I just hope Showbiz gets an invite, or he will be pissed.
king_duncan
+0 -0
I hope Showbiz crashes the wedding.
I hope Showbiz crashes the wedding.
professorhazard
+1 -0
I hope Ramses Luthor does.
I hope Ramses Luthor does.
hbaranov
+0 -0
I think it is the right time to add a new secondary character. Oh, and Emeril must get wankered on Babycham
I think it is the right time to add a new secondary character. Oh, and Emeril must get wankered on Babycham
falseprophet
+1 -0
Will that new secondary character be Umlaut Kazenzakis, progeny of Roast Beef and Molly?
Stay tuned, gang...
Will that new secondary character be Umlaut Kazenzakis, progeny of Roast Beef and Molly?
Stay tuned, gang...
pogo
+0 -1
I just wanted to add to the real face and handface chain, minus that cartoon dick hazard, of course.
I just wanted to add to the real face and handface chain, minus that cartoon dick hazard, of course.
hedonismbot
+0 -1
C-C-C-Combo Breaker!
C-C-C-Combo Breaker!
zapatos
+0 -0
Winner!
Winner!
professorhazard
+1 -0
Man, don't come down on me just because your monitor's covered in fingerprints, from when you try to grab at images that you see and like.
Man, don't come down on me just because your monitor's covered in fingerprints, from when you try to grab at images that you see and like.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Whoever he is, he's so thick, his computer runs on Dorito chip
Whoever he is, he's so thick, his computer runs on Dorito chip
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
My thoughts on your name for Beef and Molly's child: "Wow, yes."
My thoughts on your name for Beef and Molly's child: "Wow, yes."
hardelicious
+6 -0
I'm sure that Teodor could be made to lez out.
I'm sure that Teodor could be made to lez out.
algernon
+0 -0
Or talk dirty...
Or talk dirty...
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Quimarello waiting to happen
Quimarello waiting to happen
falseprophet
+3 -1
I think it would be awesome if the Wedding Reception became a multiple strip story arc like The Party where new friends are introduced, old friends are retired, Philippe and Ultra Peanut make more physiological Discoveries, and who knows...maybe Teodor will finally meet his Penny. The universe has a way of course-correcting, after all.
I think it would be awesome if the Wedding Reception became a multiple strip story arc like The Party where new friends are introduced, old friends are retired, Philippe and Ultra Peanut make more physiological Discoveries, and who knows...maybe Teodor will finally meet his Penny. The universe has a way of course-correcting, after all.
algernon
+2 -0
And it will be called "Revenge of the Continuity-Fairy".
And it will be called "Revenge of the Continuity-Fairy".
theguitarhero
+2 -1
Anything to wash away the stink of the that last story arc.
Anything to wash away the stink of the that last story arc.
hardelicious
+1 -0
I am hopink that one of our old friends is to become present at theez weddink.
I am hopink that one of our old friends is to become present at theez weddink.
algernon
+0 -0
Getting fresh with Teodor...
Or perhaps establishing a special marital "Wall of Tough Guys"?
Getting fresh with Teodor...
Or perhaps establishing a special marital "Wall of Tough Guys"?
i_love_kate
+2 -0
...Mantonio?
...Mantonio?
autrepoupee
+0 -0
You may not like your path, Teodor, but pushing Roast Beef's head is the only truly great thing that you will ever do.
You may not like your path, Teodor, but pushing Roast Beef's head is the only truly great thing that you will ever do.
falseprophet
+0 -0
I am trying to figure out what you could mean by this but every possible answer I come up with is hella dirty.
I am trying to figure out what you could mean by this but every possible answer I come up with is hella dirty.
spinynorman
+0 -0
He actually pressed on Roast Beef's head.
He actually pressed on Roast Beef's head.
pogo
+0 -0
Which still makes little of no sense.
Which still makes little of no sense.
pogo
+0 -0
- or -
- or -
autrepoupee
+0 -0
Duargh, he did PRESS on Roast Beef's head. I was trying to make the LOST reference more obvious, but I guess it didn't work as well as I had hoped.
Desmond was told that pushing the button would be the only great thing he'd ever do, in those exact terms, by Mrs. Hawke, the old lady in his flashes.
...because you said the universe course-corrects and oh this is going to look lame if you just so happened to use that phrase
Duargh, he did PRESS on Roast Beef's head. I was trying to make the LOST reference more obvious, but I guess it didn't work as well as I had hoped.
Desmond was told that pushing the button would be the only great thing he'd ever do, in those exact terms, by Mrs. Hawke, the old lady in his flashes.
...because you said the universe course-corrects and oh this is going to look lame if you just so happened to use that phrase
achilleselbow
+0 -1
Cue Pogo rant about how any post-Woodstock cultural references are stupid and pointless.
Cue Pogo rant about how any post-Woodstock cultural references are stupid and pointless.
pogo
+0 -0
Thanks you for the gracious introduction, 'Bow. Ahem. Cultural references post-Yazger's Farm are fine, but there are limits to anything. We are legion here in Assetland, and so are the shows and songs and philosophers we can reference. Instead of playing a "who can guess my hidden secret obscure reference" game all the time, perhaps we can at least give some indication, such as *** to indicate there is a hidden meaning to our phrase.
Thanks you for the gracious introduction, 'Bow. Ahem. Cultural references post-Yazger's Farm are fine, but there are limits to anything. We are legion here in Assetland, and so are the shows and songs and philosophers we can reference. Instead of playing a "who can guess my hidden secret obscure reference" game all the time, perhaps we can at least give some indication, such as *** to indicate there is a hidden meaning to our phrase.
falseprophet
+0 -0
No I did intend to make a Lost reference but I completely forgot the "only great thing you'll ever do" line I mean the "course-correcting" line is [url=https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua4ZZGST#comment_161 re-used[/url] a couple times in the show I think so I feel like it's more memorable.
I Am Sorry I Am Not As Good A Fan Of Lost And Achewood As I Should Be I Did Not Mean To Toy With Your Emotions
(inside) I Never Realized Playing Fast And Loose With References Could Send Mixed Signals
No I did intend to make a Lost reference but I completely forgot the "only great thing you'll ever do" line I mean the "course-correcting" line is [url=https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua4ZZGST#comment_161 re-used[/url] a couple times in the show I think so I feel like it's more memorable.
I Am Sorry I Am Not As Good A Fan Of Lost And Achewood As I Should Be I Did Not Mean To Toy With Your Emotions
(inside) I Never Realized Playing Fast And Loose With References Could Send Mixed Signals
falseprophet
+0 -0
Assetbar has punished me for my sins.
Assetbar has punished me for my sins.
pogo
+0 -0
Sorry, poop baby, you LOST me there.
Sorry, poop baby, you LOST me there.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
its times like these I regret choosing an internet name that so easily can be made into a joke about poop.
these times are all times.
and seriously pogo Lost is a pretty big thing, I ain't tryin' to show off***
(***check out the third season of Eek! The Cat for more details)
its times like these I regret choosing an internet name that so easily can be made into a joke about poop.
these times are all times.
and seriously pogo Lost is a pretty big thing, I ain't tryin' to show off***
(***check out the third season of Eek! The Cat for more details)
professorhazard
+1 -0
Thanks to the fucked up tiering system of Acheworld, I thought Oldstar Runner there was actually making a totally racist comment towards falseprophet.
Thanks to the fucked up tiering system of Acheworld, I thought Oldstar Runner there was actually making a totally racist comment towards falseprophet.
krockhool
+0 -0
Assetbar, please. Blame the ASSETBAR. Achewood is sacrosanct.
Assetbar, please. Blame the ASSETBAR. Achewood is sacrosanct.
professorhazard
+0 -0
The copy of Assetbar that Achewood uses is called "Acheworld", which is what I said. Its name is written in the upper-right corner of the screen.
The copy of Assetbar that Achewood uses is called "Acheworld", which is what I said. Its name is written in the upper-right corner of the screen.
krockhool
+0 -0
I stand corrected? Can I stand corrected while still standing by the truth of my statements?
I stand corrected? Can I stand corrected while still standing by the truth of my statements?
efkay
+1 -0
You mean upper-left, eh professor?
You mean upper-left, eh professor?
efkay
+0 -0
I mean it's either that or I've got that sudden onset dyslexia.
I mean it's either that or I've got that sudden onset dyslexia.
professorhazard
+1 -0
HAZ FACT: I don't know my left from my right!
HAZ FACT: I don't know my left from my right!
achilleselbow
+0 -0
"Poop baby" wouldn't be a very effective racist slur because I imagine that someone's first reaction would be to crack up rather than be offended.
"Poop baby" wouldn't be a very effective racist slur because I imagine that someone's first reaction would be to crack up rather than be offended.
professorhazard
+2 -0
I think we can all agree that that should be the automatic response to any racial slur.
I think we can all agree that that should be the automatic response to any racial slur.
hardelicious
+0 -0
A very enlightened chubby for you. But not really, cause I'm out.
A very enlightened chubby for you. But not really, cause I'm out.
hbaranov
+0 -0
vchub. You probably get most of my allocation anyway you fucking genius bastard!
vchub. You probably get most of my allocation anyway you fucking genius bastard!
zapatos
+0 -0
I have been called a cracker, I just laughed... because I have a JOB
I have been called a cracker, I just laughed... because I have a JOB
aliiis
+0 -0
It was mine!
It was mine!
pogo
+0 -0
Sorry, doll (that's what her name means in French, defenders of the young ladies. "Another doll."), I was just having some fun with your Assetbar name. And I realize "Lost" has a large and loyal audience which, good or bad, does not include me. I will go back to my jug now.
Sorry, doll (that's what her name means in French, defenders of the young ladies. "Another doll."), I was just having some fun with your Assetbar name. And I realize "Lost" has a large and loyal audience which, good or bad, does not include me. I will go back to my jug now.
charchar
+0 -0
SHIT i am sorry i lamed you. I did not find this comment lame, AssetBar, and I demand you take it back!
Take it back!
SHIT i am sorry i lamed you. I did not find this comment lame, AssetBar, and I demand you take it back!
Take it back!
peterjoel
+7 -0
hamscout
+0 -0
Vchub!
Lyle: *urp* "I am going to totally nail that bridesmaid!
...no, the other one--the short one! Yeah...." *hic*
Vchub!
Lyle: *urp* "I am going to totally nail that bridesmaid!
...no, the other one--the short one! Yeah...." *hic*
snidedk
+0 -0
I went and saw The Cure on Wednesday. Much to my chagrin, they were not selling driftwood.
I went and saw The Cure on Wednesday. Much to my chagrin, they were not selling driftwood.
perilon
+0 -0
Beef is high on greeting card design and alack, it may not translate well to an actual occasion.
Beef is high on greeting card design and alack, it may not translate well to an actual occasion.
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, _cheesekayke, Perilon)
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, _cheesekayke, Perilon)
octafish
+0 -0
Wow, that takes me back to the early 90's. No description of todays strip, instead a "Best of" of Punisher "War Journals". I don't know what to think. I really don't, I'm giving this a tentative chubby.
Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets.
Wow, that takes me back to the early 90's. No description of todays strip, instead a "Best of" of Punisher "War Journals". I don't know what to think. I really don't, I'm giving this a tentative chubby.
Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets.
professorhazard
+2 -0
Dog carcass in alley this morning, tire tread on burst stomach.
Dog carcass in alley this morning, tire tread on burst stomach.
professorhazard
+0 -0
No? No Watchmen fans? Hm.
No? No Watchmen fans? Hm.
usversusthem
+0 -0
I got both references but was long ago out of chubbies. In lieu, I will ask you how excited you are for the movie, but phrase it in the form of the sentence that I am typing right now.
There. Done. Answer at will.
I got both references but was long ago out of chubbies. In lieu, I will ask you how excited you are for the movie, but phrase it in the form of the sentence that I am typing right now.
There. Done. Answer at will.
professorhazard
+0 -0
I think young Mr. Snyder didn't let me down too hard with 300... but then again, that's like saying just because someone made a nice sandwich, that they could make a nice stained-glass window.
He added that stupid sub-plot with Leonidas's wife and the anal-sex-loving senator, which was kind of like sticking a boiled egg on a toothpick on top of my sandwich; it didn't go , but it didn't ruin things.
On the other hand, he may try to recreate God Touches Man, adding in Jar Jar Binks, God wearing a beer helmet, and Adam as a robot. There are potential problems.
I think young Mr. Snyder didn't let me down too hard with 300... but then again, that's like saying just because someone made a nice sandwich, that they could make a nice stained-glass window.
He added that stupid sub-plot with Leonidas's wife and the anal-sex-loving senator, which was kind of like sticking a boiled egg on a toothpick on top of my sandwich; it didn't go , but it didn't ruin things.
On the other hand, he may try to recreate God Touches Man, adding in Jar Jar Binks, God wearing a beer helmet, and Adam as a robot. There are potential problems.
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
I was first chubby. Let it be known now and forevermore.
I was first chubby. Let it be known now and forevermore.
achilleselbow
+14 -0
I've been thinking about pogo's long-running complaints regarding cultural references, but his proposed system of explanatory footnotes defeats the whole point of a reference, which is to make both you and the other person seem clever as well as express a bond over common tastes. With that in mind, I give you...
THE ASSETBAR CULTURAL REFERENCE INDEX
1. Approved Common Knowledge
Generally met with high rate of comprehension and assent.
-Futurama
-The Simpsons (first 8 seasons)
-Lord of the Rings
-Lost
-Star Wars
-The Matrix
-Bob Dylan
-General Dungeons & Dragons info
-Dinosaur Comics
-xkcd
-Aqua Teen Hunger Force
2. Controversial Common Knowledge
High rate of comprehension, but may get you lamed.
-Family Guy
-South Park
-Penny Arcade
-300
-The Cure
-Lolcats
-Rick Astley
-Tier 1 Shock Sites (2girls1cup, Tubgirl, Goatse)
3.Approved Moderately Obscure Knowledge
Will not be recognized by many, but will garner great appreciation from others familiar with the subject.
-British television
-Watchmen
-Pictures for Sad Children
-Brad Neely animated shorts
-Bioshock, God of War, or Elder Scrolls Oblivion
-Venture Bros, Harvey Birdman, and other Adult Swim
-Indie, folk, or noise rock
-Late 70's punk
-Scandinavian metal
-George R.R. Martin
4. Controversial Obscure Knowledge
May be lamed even by those familiar with the subject. Use with caution.
-Tier 2 shock sites (lemonparty, swap.avi)
-Anal Cunt
-Feminist/critical/literary theory
5. Unacceptable
Reveals that you are of low mind and garners lames in nearly all circumstances.
-Questionable Content
-Harry Potter
-Reality television
-____(Scary, Epic, Date) Movie
-Ironic imitations of first posts
Hope that helps!
I've been thinking about pogo's long-running complaints regarding cultural references, but his proposed system of explanatory footnotes defeats the whole point of a reference, which is to make both you and the other person seem clever as well as express a bond over common tastes. With that in mind, I give you...
THE ASSETBAR CULTURAL REFERENCE INDEX
1. Approved Common Knowledge
Generally met with high rate of comprehension and assent.
-Futurama
-The Simpsons (first 8 seasons)
-Lord of the Rings
-Lost
-Star Wars
-The Matrix
-Bob Dylan
-General Dungeons & Dragons info
-Dinosaur Comics
-xkcd
-Aqua Teen Hunger Force
2. Controversial Common Knowledge
High rate of comprehension, but may get you lamed.
-Family Guy
-South Park
-Penny Arcade
-300
-The Cure
-Lolcats
-Rick Astley
-Tier 1 Shock Sites (2girls1cup, Tubgirl, Goatse)
3.Approved Moderately Obscure Knowledge
Will not be recognized by many, but will garner great appreciation from others familiar with the subject.
-British television
-Watchmen
-Pictures for Sad Children
-Brad Neely animated shorts
-Bioshock, God of War, or Elder Scrolls Oblivion
-Venture Bros, Harvey Birdman, and other Adult Swim
-Indie, folk, or noise rock
-Late 70's punk
-Scandinavian metal
-George R.R. Martin
4. Controversial Obscure Knowledge
May be lamed even by those familiar with the subject. Use with caution.
-Tier 2 shock sites (lemonparty, swap.avi)
-Anal Cunt
-Feminist/critical/literary theory
5. Unacceptable
Reveals that you are of low mind and garners lames in nearly all circumstances.
-Questionable Content
-Harry Potter
-Reality television
-____(Scary, Epic, Date) Movie
-Ironic imitations of first posts
Hope that helps!
straw
+0 -0
6. Played-out Slogans
Even when said ironically, and sometimes especially, these will in the best cases garner you a lame.
-Oh snap!
-Don't go there!
-You go girl!
-Talk to the hand!
-&c.
6. Played-out Slogans
Even when said ironically, and sometimes especially, these will in the best cases garner you a lame.
-Oh snap!
-Don't go there!
-You go girl!
-Talk to the hand!
-&c.
iseedeadpixels
+1 -0
Possible addendums (that means addition right?) To...
1. Approved Common Knowledge
-Perry Bible Fellowship
3. Approved moderately obscure knowledge
-Buttercup Festival
-Cat and Girl
-Bill Bailey
-Tommy Tiernan
-Maakies
7. Stuff I try to talk about with people but no one has heard of it
-Rice Boy
Possible addendums (that means addition right?) To...
1. Approved Common Knowledge
-Perry Bible Fellowship
3. Approved moderately obscure knowledge
-Buttercup Festival
-Cat and Girl
-Bill Bailey
-Tommy Tiernan
-Maakies
7. Stuff I try to talk about with people but no one has heard of it
-Rice Boy
tekende
+1 -0
Dude, Rice Boy was good stuff!
Dude, Rice Boy was good stuff!
zapatos
+0 -0
Chubbies all around for knowing Rice Boy.
Chubbies all around for knowing Rice Boy.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Alas poor Achilles, my chub hardly knew thee. Seriously, VChubbed. Repost on the next one, it'd make a worthy first post and I will chub it to death.
Alas poor Achilles, my chub hardly knew thee. Seriously, VChubbed. Repost on the next one, it'd make a worthy first post and I will chub it to death.
falseprophet
+0 -0
loneal
+0 -0
I have chubbied you for magnificence. I like how you know enough about shock sites to separate them into two tiers. (I also like how feminism is in with the second tier. Sigh.)
I have chubbied you for magnificence. I like how you know enough about shock sites to separate them into two tiers. (I also like how feminism is in with the second tier. Sigh.)
hamscout
+0 -0
Also in the Unacceptable category:
Posting a ridiculous and obviously anti-feminist joke image when no one will take it as a joke. (learned that the hard way--50% of my lame allotment came from this misstep.)
Also in the Unacceptable category:
Posting a ridiculous and obviously anti-feminist joke image when no one will take it as a joke. (learned that the hard way--50% of my lame allotment came from this misstep.)
xiaomimi
+0 -0
Hey, that was a neat conversation about sexism! You got some iron eggs there, handface.
Hey, that was a neat conversation about sexism! You got some iron eggs there, handface.
hamscout
+0 -0
I definitely meant no harm, but I'm satisfied that it erupted into such a healthy debate...
I definitely meant no harm, but I'm satisfied that it erupted into such a healthy debate...
cromar
+0 -0
Ha ha. Nice work and sharp wit! But you forgot emoticons... which fall in to category 5, right?
Ha ha. Nice work and sharp wit! But you forgot emoticons... which fall in to category 5, right?
catgrl131
+0 -0
Well, I was under the impression that right-side-up ones were alright. C'mon, put some creativity into your text depictions of emotions! ^.~
Well, I was under the impression that right-side-up ones were alright. C'mon, put some creativity into your text depictions of emotions! ^.~
achilleselbow
+0 -0
I just realized that this information could have been better presented as various points on a 2-axis graph of obscurity and acceptability.
I just realized that this information could have been better presented as various points on a 2-axis graph of obscurity and acceptability.
catgrl131
+0 -0
Who's gonna make it happen?
Who's gonna make it happen?
usversusthem
+0 -0
dammit where is edwell when you really need him?
dammit where is edwell when you really need him?
edwell
+19 -0
drskradley
+0 -0
Again you bring the pain, Edwell. And again, I have no chubbies to summon for you.
As someone said about something else a while ago:
"a solid gold dump on my chest."
Again you bring the pain, Edwell. And again, I have no chubbies to summon for you.
As someone said about something else a while ago:
"a solid gold dump on my chest."
hamscout
+0 -0
O dear Jeebus, YES! All my V-chubs are belong to you.
Extra points for the superb Tie Fighter with background.
O dear Jeebus, YES! All my V-chubs are belong to you.
Extra points for the superb Tie Fighter with background.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Edwell, I confess...this whole thing was a complex ploy to give me yet another excuse to proclaim my love for you.
Edwell, I confess...this whole thing was a complex ploy to give me yet another excuse to proclaim my love for you.
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
cromar
+0 -0
Pure gold! Have a W-Chub (one better than a V-Chub).
Pure gold! Have a W-Chub (one better than a V-Chub).
drskradley
+0 -0
I missed this for too long, and it, also, deserves many chubbies I am not the man to give.
I missed this for too long, and it, also, deserves many chubbies I am not the man to give.
pogo
+0 -0
Massive v-chubs for the half-Tajik master!
Massive v-chubs for the half-Tajik master!
catgrl131
+0 -0
Hey, where do Achewood references fall on the spectrum?
Hey, where do Achewood references fall on the spectrum?
echidnaboy
+1 -0
Goodbye michelLe my little one
you gAve me love and helpeD me find the sun
and every time that i was down
You would always come around
and get my feet Back on the ground
goOdbye Michelle it's haRd to diE
when all the birds are singing in the sKy
now that the SprIng iS in the air
whiff of fLOwers eV'rywhere
i wish that wE could both be there
Goodbye michelLe my little one
you gAve me love and helpeD me find the sun
and every time that i was down
You would always come around
and get my feet Back on the ground
goOdbye Michelle it's haRd to diE
when all the birds are singing in the sKy
now that the SprIng iS in the air
whiff of fLOwers eV'rywhere
i wish that wE could both be there
echidnaboy
+0 -0
Ignore the errant 'M'. I am a poor disciple. May Rex forgive me.
Ignore the errant 'M'. I am a poor disciple. May Rex forgive me.
falseprophet
+0 -0
I read this as being in a Swedish accent.
I read this as being in a Swedish accent.
achilleselbow
+1 -0
Move every zig!
Move every zig!
hbaranov
+0 -0
For great Justice!
For great Justice!
riversblack
+0 -0
Dude is gonna be set for the year.
Relaxofan is SO a bi-monthly thing. You don't want to tempt yourself with more hangin around.
Well planned. Well planned.
Dude is gonna be set for the year.
Relaxofan is SO a bi-monthly thing. You don't want to tempt yourself with more hangin around.
Well planned. Well planned.
aliiis
+0 -0
This reminded me that the thing I would have liked best would be if only he could have been registered at UNDERPANTS TIME
WHERE ITS
ALWAYS TIME FOR
UNDER PANTS
This reminded me that the thing I would have liked best would be if only he could have been registered at UNDERPANTS TIME
WHERE ITS
ALWAYS TIME FOR
UNDER PANTS
hawaiian_robot
+0 -0
A 1959 Goldtop Gibson Les Paul would probably net them more cash.
A 1959 Goldtop Gibson Les Paul would probably net them more cash.
the_dude
+1 -0
a 59 is worth like 400,000 i believe, it might have been touched by jimmy page or something but that is what i heard they go for.
also,
Woah, huge slam on todd out of nowhere!
(but not really)
a 59 is worth like 400,000 i believe, it might have been touched by jimmy page or something but that is what i heard they go for.
also,
Woah, huge slam on todd out of nowhere!
(but not really)
hawaiian_robot
+0 -0
...And I'm a non-fact-checking dickhead; the goldtops were only made from '52-'57. You're right, '59 seems to be a magical year in terms of cost, thought some kind of magical '59 goldtop existed.
I'm more into Fenders, anyway.
...And I'm a non-fact-checking dickhead; the goldtops were only made from '52-'57. You're right, '59 seems to be a magical year in terms of cost, thought some kind of magical '59 goldtop existed.
I'm more into Fenders, anyway.
echidnaboy
+0 -0
I'm more shocked by the huge slam on Teodor.
So, is this "huge slam" thing a Thing, now?
I'm more shocked by the huge slam on Teodor.
So, is this "huge slam" thing a Thing, now?
algernon
+0 -0
Yes. How does it feel to have started a thing?
Yes. How does it feel to have started a thing?
echidnaboy
+0 -0
Oh, I wasn't the first. Tekende made the same reference a couple of months ago and I happened to spot it on my trawl through the archives. My memes are a dog's memes. They could never make a man ROFLHAO. Not like Tekende's memes.
Oh, I wasn't the first. Tekende made the same reference a couple of months ago and I happened to spot it on my trawl through the archives. My memes are a dog's memes. They could never make a man ROFLHAO. Not like Tekende's memes.
straw
+0 -0
It is often said that Tekende is rad. As a matter of fact, I'll say it right now:
Tekende is rad.
Thank you.
It is often said that Tekende is rad. As a matter of fact, I'll say it right now:
Tekende is rad.
Thank you.
hbaranov
+0 -1
How dare you say Tekende is rad. He is so much more and less a the same time.
On another note, I now have a 4 tab comic wall between Achewood and QC on my browser tabs - the universe is safe.
How dare you say Tekende is rad. He is so much more and less a the same time.
On another note, I now have a 4 tab comic wall between Achewood and QC on my browser tabs - the universe is safe.
maximus
+0 -0
Okay - if you use a meme to discuss your meta-meme selection process again, you will break the internet. Either that or my head will erupt, spraying a fine mist of blood and brain matter all over my nice lcd screen.
Okay - if you use a meme to discuss your meta-meme selection process again, you will break the internet. Either that or my head will erupt, spraying a fine mist of blood and brain matter all over my nice lcd screen.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Even on that mare over there?
Even on that mare over there?
catgrl131
+0 -0
Some even got on the mayor?
Some even got on the mayor?
hedonismbot
+0 -1
I'm going to go ahead and call that meme 8 hours before you. Get your own. I suggest something about clits.
I'm going to go ahead and call that meme 8 hours before you. Get your own. I suggest something about clits.
catgrl131
+1 -2
Erm....
CLITS
THEY ARE QUITE AGREEABLE
Erm....
CLITS
THEY ARE QUITE AGREEABLE
achilleselbow
+0 -2
I HAVE RATHER STRONG FEELINGS OF AFFECTION FOR THEM
I HAVE RATHER STRONG FEELINGS OF AFFECTION FOR THEM
hbaranov
+0 -0
You sound like QC characters. Stop it
You sound like QC characters. Stop it
hamscout
+0 -0
are...are they moist?
are...are they moist?
hbaranov
+0 -0
No. No they are not. *yells*
No. No they are not. *yells*
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
WELCOME TO MY BASE
WELCOME TO MY BASE
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Fair enough, you can have the clits meme. All the clits you want. I'll give you all 6 of mine. Lemme get my jar...
Fair enough, you can have the clits meme. All the clits you want. I'll give you all 6 of mine. Lemme get my jar...
pogo
+0 -0
Googling "huge slam out of nowhere" pulls up a wrestling reference, Nov. 2007, and some recent uses, seems to be a new thing.
Googling "huge slam out of nowhere" pulls up a wrestling reference, Nov. 2007, and some recent uses, seems to be a new thing.
echidnaboy
+1 -0
Whoa! Huge slam on MST3K outta 1997!
Whoa! Huge slam on MST3K outta 1997!
pogo
+0 -0
How do I know you didn't re-record the dialog? (Great movie for MST3L treatment, BTW.)
How do I know you didn't re-record the dialog? (Great movie for MST3L treatment, BTW.)
professorhazard
+1 -0
Mystery Science Theater Three-Fifty?
Mystery Science Theater Three-Fifty?
hamscout
+0 -0
Mick Mellixvee?
Mick Mellixvee?
professorhazard
+0 -0
You see, "L" is "50" in Roman numerals.
You see, "L" is "50" in Roman numerals.
hamscout
+0 -0
Yeah, I was quoting MST3 K ...
They see the date of the movie in roman numerals, and said it like a name...
MCMLXVII
Yeah, I was quoting MST3 K ...
They see the date of the movie in roman numerals, and said it like a name...
MCMLXVII
hamscout
+0 -0
dammit! I forgot the *** for pogo...
dammit! I forgot the *** for pogo...
pogo
+0 -0
Thanks, I was lost for a moment there. sonny.
Thanks, I was lost for a moment there. sonny.
professorhazard
+0 -0
Em cee em ell ecks eye ecks, Daiei makes the very best~
Em cee em ell ecks eye ecks, Daiei makes the very best~
hbaranov
+0 -0
To be honest, did you not see it coming? Anyway, I think it's rather nice he gets to lead the smoking break.
To be honest, did you not see it coming? Anyway, I think it's rather nice he gets to lead the smoking break.
the_dude
+0 -0
57,
doh!
57,
doh!
newwavepony
+0 -0
Only one smoke break? Damn.
Only one smoke break? Damn.
pyromancer
+0 -0
Yeah, but smoking in place? It's been years!
Yeah, but smoking in place? It's been years!
gormster
+0 -0
Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.
We've known each other since we're nine or ten.
Together we climbed hills or trees.
Learned of love and ABC's,
skinned our hearts and skinned our knees.
Goodbye my friend, it's hard to die
Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.
We've known each other since we're nine or ten.
Together we climbed hills or trees.
Learned of love and ABC's,
skinned our hearts and skinned our knees.
Goodbye my friend, it's hard to die
gormster
+0 -0
FUCK that was six lines
FUCK that was six lines
octafish
+3 -0
Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.
We've known each other since we're nine or ten.
Together we climbed hills or trees.
*Stops, lights cigarette.*
Pouf, Pouf, Pouf.
Dammn Beef whatcha buggin' fo', daaaymmmn.
Learned of love and ABC's,
Yadda, yadda knees.
Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.
We've known each other since we're nine or ten.
Together we climbed hills or trees.
*Stops, lights cigarette.*
Pouf, Pouf, Pouf.
Dammn Beef whatcha buggin' fo', daaaymmmn.
Learned of love and ABC's,
Yadda, yadda knees.
echidnaboy
+0 -0
I thought using British English spelling was considered criminally pretentious in the US. Is the macron over the "u" an ironic diacritic?
I thought using British English spelling was considered criminally pretentious in the US. Is the macron over the "u" an ironic diacritic?
hbaranov
+0 -0
It's called a macron? Sweet. It's like a macaroon, but nowhere as near as yummy, and unlike macaroons, it is only suitable for European Languages. In fact, it's nothing like a macaroon. Alas.
It's called a macron? Sweet. It's like a macaroon, but nowhere as near as yummy, and unlike macaroons, it is only suitable for European Languages. In fact, it's nothing like a macaroon. Alas.
flyffe
+0 -0
Dunno about the second, I myself feel that macaroons are best eaten with a slight French accent...
Dunno about the second, I myself feel that macaroons are best eaten with a slight French accent...
hbaranov
+0 -0
But imagine the perils or attempting to describe the ingredients of the macaroon in a french accent 'eet ees made oov coconuweet'
But imagine the perils or attempting to describe the ingredients of the macaroon in a french accent 'eet ees made oov coconuweet'
perilon
+0 -0
To me that looks like a diaeresis, not a macron, although due to compression it's sort of hard to tell. It's most certainly ironic in nature, a sort of "heavy metal umlaut" of the gettin' hitched world. Every time the word is spoken aloud in the ceremony, it must be pronounced "on-oh-oor."
To me that looks like a diaeresis, not a macron, although due to compression it's sort of hard to tell. It's most certainly ironic in nature, a sort of "heavy metal umlaut" of the gettin' hitched world. Every time the word is spoken aloud in the ceremony, it must be pronounced "on-oh-oor."
invidious
+0 -0
Diaeresis? Better lay off the Helpolax, then.
Diaeresis? Better lay off the Helpolax, then.
professorhazard
+0 -1
Yeah, I'm pretty sure the umlaut comes out and says FUCK YOU HERE'S YOUR PRETENTIOUS SUPERFLUOUS VOWEL to everyone who overuses it to add some colour and flavour to their quote unquote boring American text.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure the umlaut comes out and says FUCK YOU HERE'S YOUR PRETENTIOUS SUPERFLUOUS VOWEL to everyone who overuses it to add some colour and flavour to their quote unquote boring American text.
professorhazard
+2 -1
P.S. I hope I did not misuse "umlaut", causing unneeded terrour and horrour with my errour
P.S. I hope I did not misuse "umlaut", causing unneeded terrour and horrour with my errour
cromar
+2 -0
u: <- you made it fall off
u: <- you made it fall off
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
I would just like to say that Prof. Hazard is tearing this asset up like David Yow on PCP.
I would just like to say that Prof. Hazard is tearing this asset up like David Yow on PCP.
irondave
+0 -0
Why oh why would this get a lame? Who is that humorless?
Why oh why would this get a lame? Who is that humorless?
professorhazard
+0 -0
Someone who thinks it's real classy to spell like a Brit.
Someone who thinks it's real classy to spell like a Brit.
pogo
+0 -0
Some boring American unlaut user, I guess.
Some boring American unlaut user, I guess.
charchar
+0 -0
It is fun to spell like a Brit. My english teacher tries to yell at me about it but she doesn't even know what a gerund is .
British people I am sorry I try to be like you
[i](inside) But you can't invent all my favourite rock groups and have radical accents and espouse delicious tea and act all surprised when I say 'favourite colour licence' in an Alabama accent. You just can't.
It is fun to spell like a Brit. My english teacher tries to yell at me about it but she doesn't even know what a gerund is .
British people I am sorry I try to be like you
[i](inside) But you can't invent all my favourite rock groups and have radical accents and espouse delicious tea and act all surprised when I say 'favourite colour licence' in an Alabama accent. You just can't.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Tis a shame you failed on the italics. But as a Brit, I approve, you Alabamaian(?) person.
Tis a shame you failed on the italics. But as a Brit, I approve, you Alabamaian(?) person.
cromar
+0 -0
IT'S A TRAP
IT'S A TRAP
professorhazard
+0 -0
To properly decide what to call a native of the state, examine the etymology of its name. Researchers of the lost colony of Roanoke Island suppose that Turkish deckhands that lived in the colony gave Middle Eastern names to areas, upon mingling with the Native Americans. These people theorize that they gave the name Alabama as "Allah Baimya", or "God's Graveyard". An article without a byline appearing in the Jacksonville Republican on July 27, 1842 originated the idea that the meaning of the state's name was "Here We Rest", giving some credence to the Turkish theory.
BUT WE JUST CAWL 'EM HICKS CUZ THEY A BUNCHA HICKS
YEEEEEE-HAWWWWWWWW
To properly decide what to call a native of the state, examine the etymology of its name. Researchers of the lost colony of Roanoke Island suppose that Turkish deckhands that lived in the colony gave Middle Eastern names to areas, upon mingling with the Native Americans. These people theorize that they gave the name Alabama as "Allah Baimya", or "God's Graveyard". An article without a byline appearing in the Jacksonville Republican on July 27, 1842 originated the idea that the meaning of the state's name was "Here We Rest", giving some credence to the Turkish theory.
BUT WE JUST CAWL 'EM HICKS CUZ THEY A BUNCHA HICKS
YEEEEEE-HAWWWWWWWW
hbaranov
+0 -0
So Alabama people are the corpses God hates?
Meh, meme revival is amusing.
So Alabama people are the corpses God hates?
Meh, meme revival is amusing.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Assetbar, fuck off and die, for ruining my pic.
Assetbar, fuck off and die, for ruining my pic.
falseprophet
+0 -0
But if it happens to you
The same kind of deal
I recommend fire
Instead of the fool
But if it happens to you
The same kind of deal
I recommend fire
Instead of the fool
charchar
+0 -0
Yes.
Yes.
hbaranov
+0 -1
So if my HD is high enough and I can cast turn undead, as per a level 21 cleric, you become my slave? Sweet...
So if my HD is high enough and I can cast turn undead, as per a level 21 cleric, you become my slave? Sweet...
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
Oh man, cups of tea...
LOVE THEM.
Oh man, cups of tea...
LOVE THEM.
algernon
+0 -0
Roast Beef considers honeymoon locations:
1. Jamaica? 'I ain't goin' nowhere the sun shines,
gettin' so burned I can't hardly lie down,
havin' to chill my undergarments in the freezer
while no one's lookin'.'
2. Ray's Pool House? 'With the money from the Les
Paul, both the missus and Ray wouldn't
understand.'
3. Heaven? 'Perfect.'
Roast Beef considers honeymoon locations:
1. Jamaica? 'I ain't goin' nowhere the sun shines,
gettin' so burned I can't hardly lie down,
havin' to chill my undergarments in the freezer
while no one's lookin'.'
2. Ray's Pool House? 'With the money from the Les
Paul, both the missus and Ray wouldn't
understand.'
3. Heaven? 'Perfect.'
gormster
+0 -0
heaven burned down man
heaven burned down man
aelindil
+0 -0
Well, he's already been to Nicaragua.
Well, he's already been to Nicaragua.
ricnine
+0 -0
The second line of panel 2 alone gets this strip a 5.
The second line of panel 2 alone gets this strip a 5.
gormster
+3 -0
latitude 2, longitude 2, altitude awesome
latitude 2, longitude 2, altitude awesome
straw
+0 -0
Attitude.. *chk* pfffff Hhhaaadjusted.
Attitude.. *chk* pfffff Hhhaaadjusted.
schroduck
+1 -0
It's so rare for people to consider the pilcrow an attractive wedding invitation decoration, but I think Roast Beef pulls it off.
It's so rare for people to consider the pilcrow an attractive wedding invitation decoration, but I think Roast Beef pulls it off.
someonegreat
+1 -0
I googled hopeugrin to see if it was an actual drug. Now I feel a little bit silly.
I googled hopeugrin to see if it was an actual drug. Now I feel a little bit silly.
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
Err... Yeah... So did I.
Maybe we could start some sort of club for gullible people...
Err... Yeah... So did I.
Maybe we could start some sort of club for gullible people...
hbaranov
+0 -0
Of course, no girls can join
Of course, no girls can join
someonegreat
+0 -0
Wait, seriously?
Wait, seriously?
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
Of course not- don't be so gullible!
(On second thoughts, as it's our group's raison d'etre, do!)
Of course not- don't be so gullible!
(On second thoughts, as it's our group's raison d'etre, do!)
andyfaewatford
+6 -0
I propose a Assetbar Gullible Poster's Club trip. Bring a spade:
I propose a Assetbar Gullible Poster's Club trip. Bring a spade:
algernon
+0 -0
I will ironically arrive, stand by this sign, holding my spade, before realising that I missed the joke.
I will ironically arrive, stand by this sign, holding my spade, before realising that I missed the joke.
professorhazard
+2 -0
I'd like to introduce you fellows to a little friend of mine - Gulliblex.
/shakes the little prescription bottle with a smile
I'd like to introduce you fellows to a little friend of mine - Gulliblex.
/shakes the little prescription bottle with a smile
odei
+0 -0
I didn't notice that graffiti! I think it's gone now, and the one under the pier.
I didn't notice that graffiti! I think it's gone now, and the one under the pier.
loneal
+0 -0
Oh, but your old one was so cute! I had no idea what it was, but it was so cute!
Oh, but your old one was so cute! I had no idea what it was, but it was so cute!
loneal
+0 -0
Uh, wrong post of yours?
Uh, wrong post of yours?
loneal
+0 -0
But I still liked your old icon.
But I still liked your old icon.
hbaranov
+0 -0
It's okay loneal. The microsoft avatar has destroyed his brain. He cannot read any more.
It's okay loneal. The microsoft avatar has destroyed his brain. He cannot read any more.
odei
+0 -0
Aaaahrg RAAGH HRUG
Aaaahrg RAAGH HRUG
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Your club can meet in Cunty the Sardine's apartment.
Your club can meet in Cunty the Sardine's apartment.
zeal
+3 -1
It's good to know that Achewood is taking a turn towards fantasy, what with Phillipe being announced as the Ring Bearer now and all. I look forward to Cornelius' duel with the Balrog.
It's good to know that Achewood is taking a turn towards fantasy, what with Phillipe being announced as the Ring Bearer now and all. I look forward to Cornelius' duel with the Balrog.
hbaranov
+0 -0
You sir, astound me, and please me at the same time. I assume Todd plays the role of Boromir, and Ray cameos as an Aragorn with a mobile phone.
You sir, astound me, and please me at the same time. I assume Todd plays the role of Boromir, and Ray cameos as an Aragorn with a mobile phone.
professorhazard
+8 -0
one d-d-does not f-f-fuckin' blaze one into Mordor, shit-tits!
one d-d-does not f-f-fuckin' blaze one into Mordor, shit-tits!
aperson
+1 -0
This is madness! How do you propose to defeat Sauron's army?!
I guess by not givin' a shit!
(sorry, that was a long winded chub-augmenting v-chub, for the lulz)
This is madness! How do you propose to defeat Sauron's army?!
I guess by not givin' a shit!
(sorry, that was a long winded chub-augmenting v-chub, for the lulz)
professorhazard
+0 -0
M-m-m-madness?!
I
AM
RUDE
M-m-m-madness?!
I
AM
RUDE
hbaranov
+0 -0
Yessar you are.
Yessar you are.
pygmalion00
+0 -0
Ass-turned-breast-turned-hole Man: Lyle Gabriel
Gay Man: Pat Reynolds
Grizzly Man: Timothy Treadwell
Ass-turned-breast-turned-hole Man: Lyle Gabriel
Gay Man: Pat Reynolds
Grizzly Man: Timothy Treadwell
octafish
+0 -0
In America you eat chocolate, in Grizzly Man Chocolate cold rips you a-fucking-part!
In America you eat chocolate, in Grizzly Man Chocolate cold rips you a-fucking-part!
vermy
+0 -0
Dead Man: Leo Fontanette
Dead Man: Leo Fontanette
hardelicious
+8 -1
THIS JUST IN: MAN BANGS AIRWOLF
THIS JUST IN: MAN BANGS AIRWOLF
THIS JUST IN: MAN BANGS AIRWOLF
THIS JUST IN: MAN BANGS AIRWOLF
hardelicious
+0 -0
Apparently it bears repeating.
Apparently it bears repeating.
andyfaewatford
+3 -0
I can't decide if my feelings on this are Sick and Wrong, or just Wrong and Sick.
Unsuprisingly, he agreed to be interviewed for a Channel 5 documentary entitled 'Fuck Coronation Street, You Just Will Not Believe This Shit! This Man Rapes Cars! He Rapes Cars!!! '
I can't decide if my feelings on this are Sick and Wrong, or just Wrong and Sick.
Unsuprisingly, he agreed to be interviewed for a Channel 5 documentary entitled 'Fuck Coronation Street, You Just Will Not Believe This Shit! This Man Rapes Cars! He Rapes Cars!!! '
hamscout
+0 -0
nonsense! it was completely consensual!
do you think when he...he does it, he sits in the front or back seat?
(or perhaps Herbie likes it in the boot?)
nonsense! it was completely consensual!
do you think when he...he does it, he sits in the front or back seat?
(or perhaps Herbie likes it in the boot?)
achilleselbow
+0 -0
I'm guessing it involves the exhaust pipe. Otherwise, I don't see what he could do besides just rubbing himself against it.
I'm guessing it involves the exhaust pipe. Otherwise, I don't see what he could do besides just rubbing himself against it.
hardelicious
+8 -0
cromar
+2 -0
DAMN
DAMN
falseprophet
+0 -0
*~* Black America's feelings on the Nation of Domination are: Con *~*
But ...
*~* Falseprophet's feelings on the Nation of Domination are: Pro *~*
*~* Black America's feelings on the Nation of Domination are: Con *~*
But ...
*~* Falseprophet's feelings on the Nation of Domination are: Pro *~*
cromar
+0 -0
May I ask why they are offensive? Honestly I only know Ron Simmons briefly and the NOD none at all.
May I ask why they are offensive? Honestly I only know Ron Simmons briefly and the NOD none at all.
hbaranov
+0 -0
KANE LIVES
KANE LIVES
falseprophet
+1 -0
Basically the NOD is a rich white man's idea of what poor white men think black power is all about. This is not something most of Black America would approve of. Even if you are a black person and you do not have mad respect for the Nation of Islam it is hella annoying for that to be the image portrayed to the rest of the country, even if it is in the very non-literary milieu of WWE storylines.
I appreciate my memories of them, however, from a "Man that is fuckin hilarious" young teenager perspective.
This has been "African-America: A Hive-Mind of Individuals" with FalseProphet
Basically the NOD is a rich white man's idea of what poor white men think black power is all about. This is not something most of Black America would approve of. Even if you are a black person and you do not have mad respect for the Nation of Islam it is hella annoying for that to be the image portrayed to the rest of the country, even if it is in the very non-literary milieu of WWE storylines.
I appreciate my memories of them, however, from a "Man that is fuckin hilarious" young teenager perspective.
This has been "African-America: A Hive-Mind of Individuals" with FalseProphet
hbaranov
+0 -0
No you fool. Nod is the Brotherhood. Peace through Power. One Vision One Purpose. Long live the green crystal!
No you fool. Nod is the Brotherhood. Peace through Power. One Vision One Purpose. Long live the green crystal!
ortsac
+0 -0
I've seen that picture two times, now. I was reminded of this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E13aTW7C4zw
I've seen that picture two times, now. I was reminded of this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E13aTW7C4zw
howl
+0 -0
Ironically, the car's name is Vanilla.
Ironically, the car's name is Vanilla.
phy
+0 -0
I'm hearing it in that 1940's radio newscaster voice with Morse code beeping in the background for effect
I'm hearing it in that 1940's radio newscaster voice with Morse code beeping in the background for effect
algernon
+0 -0
I do not want to know how you came across that, by which I mean I want to know how you came across that.
I do not want to know how you came across that, by which I mean I want to know how you came across that.
andyfaewatford
+1 -0
That's what the policeman said when they found him shagging Airwolf...
That's what the policeman said when they found him shagging Airwolf...
algernon
+1 -0
How would you explain this when your mother has to come down to the station to bail you out?
"Young man, why are you in jail?"
"It's not my fault mom, I swear, the other kids stuck a potato right up old Mr.Smuckle's Airwolf's exhaust pipe so that it would blow up when he turned it on in the morning, and I was just trying to get it out, but the harder I tried the deeper it went, mom, I swear."
How would you explain this when your mother has to come down to the station to bail you out?
"Young man, why are you in jail?"
"It's not my fault mom, I swear, the other kids stuck a potato right up old Mr.Smuckle's Airwolf's exhaust pipe so that it would blow up when he turned it on in the morning, and I was just trying to get it out, but the harder I tried the deeper it went, mom, I swear."
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
To linger on this for far longer than is necessary, I was just wndering what the, er, mechanics of shagging airwolf would be. I mean, do helicopters actually have exhaust pipes? The petrol cap would seem a dangerous choice of orifice for a young man...
To linger on this for far longer than is necessary, I was just wndering what the, er, mechanics of shagging airwolf would be. I mean, do helicopters actually have exhaust pipes? The petrol cap would seem a dangerous choice of orifice for a young man...
octafish
+0 -0
Get her motor running, get a nice bit of suction in through the carburetor, I imagine its a bit like a poddy calf...
Actually I remember reading a scene where an academic has sex with his Porsche in Pynchon's Vineland .
P.S. I did not have sex with that poddy calf, Miss Lewinsky.
Get her motor running, get a nice bit of suction in through the carburetor, I imagine its a bit like a poddy calf...
Actually I remember reading a scene where an academic has sex with his Porsche in Pynchon's Vineland .
P.S. I did not have sex with that poddy calf, Miss Lewinsky.
loneal
+0 -0
I remember reading a scene like that on every single fucking page of J.G. Ballard's Crash .
I remember reading a scene like that on every single fucking page of J.G. Ballard's Crash .
bixschmix
+0 -0
Yes. Yes indeed, loneal.
Yes. Yes indeed, loneal.
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
I remember watching the movie and thereby avoiding any reading at all!
I remember watching the movie and thereby avoiding any reading at all!
talix18
+0 -0
I tried to read this comment, but "Born to be Wild" started blasting through my head.
I tried to read this comment, but "Born to be Wild" started blasting through my head.
octafish
+1 -0
Like a true nature's child, I thought that as I typed.
Like a true nature's child, I thought that as I typed.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
How exactly would the...logistics of that work?
A car doesn't exactly have an mucus membranes...
How exactly would the...logistics of that work?
A car doesn't exactly have an mucus membranes...
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
I would imagine that someone who routinely has intercourse with cars and actually calls one of them his 'girlfriend' would have no problem fashioning some sort of lubricant out of his own drool and spittle.
Perhaps it's best if we don't understand how he does it. Then we ourselves will never be tempted.
I would imagine that someone who routinely has intercourse with cars and actually calls one of them his 'girlfriend' would have no problem fashioning some sort of lubricant out of his own drool and spittle.
Perhaps it's best if we don't understand how he does it. Then we ourselves will never be tempted.
nbgreene
+9 -0
what do you expect mother, i'm half machine!
I'M A MONSTER!!!
what do you expect mother, i'm half machine!
I'M A MONSTER!!!
hardelicious
+0 -0
Unfortunately, I'm out of chubbies. But you, Buster, receive an honorary one.
Unfortunately, I'm out of chubbies. But you, Buster, receive an honorary one.
autrepoupee
+1 -0
Columbo is saying this.
At least 500 people have at least thought about having sex with a car enough to register on a forum dedicated to just that, and Columbo is explaining that a man might've fashioned a crude lubricant using his own moisture-style wastes so he could have sex with Airwolf, somehow.
This is the internet.
Columbo is saying this.
At least 500 people have at least thought about having sex with a car enough to register on a forum dedicated to just that, and Columbo is explaining that a man might've fashioned a crude lubricant using his own moisture-style wastes so he could have sex with Airwolf, somehow.
This is the internet.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
And I am it's Columbo.
Here is the guy from the article's Myspace.
He also likes lions, of course.
And apparently some woman from my state is into this car-fuckin' thing.
And I am it's Columbo.
Here is the guy from the article's Myspace.
He also likes lions, of course.
And apparently some woman from my state is into this car-fuckin' thing.
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
"Status: Single"! What's Herbie gonna think when he reads that? No auto-eroticism for Edward tonight, I think...
"Status: Single"! What's Herbie gonna think when he reads that? No auto-eroticism for Edward tonight, I think...
cromar
+0 -0
No, I wasn't trying to kill myself! I was practicing auto-erotic asphyxiation and passed out!
No, I wasn't trying to kill myself! I was practicing auto-erotic asphyxiation and passed out!
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
Hhhaaa, auto -erotic.
Hhhaaa, auto -erotic.
kamet
+0 -0
Dude, he's a furry too!!
Dude, he's a furry too!!
hedonismbot
+1 -0
If you don't know how to find a lubed spot on a car, you don't deserve to be fucking them. Not that I do. I'm more the BBW style semi truck pounder myself. More comfortable with my 'equipment'. By which I mean my enormous metallic genitals.
If you don't know how to find a lubed spot on a car, you don't deserve to be fucking them. Not that I do. I'm more the BBW style semi truck pounder myself. More comfortable with my 'equipment'. By which I mean my enormous metallic genitals.
hamscout
+2 -0
" this is the most complicated dashboard I've ever come across "
(sorry)
" this is the most complicated dashboard I've ever come across "
(sorry)
hardelicious
+0 -0
Hey-oh!
Hey-oh!
invidious
+0 -0
" wow, check out the bumpers on her "
Applies to:
1. Cars
2. fattybeaver's avataricon
" wow, check out the bumpers on her "
Applies to:
1. Cars
2. fattybeaver's avataricon
nbgreene
+0 -0
ok thats it. i'm withdrawing my ebay airwolf bid right now.
ok thats it. i'm withdrawing my ebay airwolf bid right now.
hardelicious
+0 -0
The actual story is very humorous, but only to two people on earth, so let's just call it "algernon's choice" and you choose how you want me to have come across it.
The actual story is very humorous, but only to two people on earth, so let's just call it "algernon's choice" and you choose how you want me to have come across it.
algernon
+3 -0
Algernon%u2019s Choice: The Airwolf Diaries
Hardelicious%u2019 old mum came down to his house, all in a flutter.
%u201CWhat is this I hear about my son using that filthy den of pornographers and drug-addicts: The Internet,%u201D she shouted while lifting his apartment%u2019s door straight off its hinges.
%u201CWhat, no mom,%u201D Hardelicious protested, as he was backed into a corner under her baleful glare, %u201Cthe internet%u2019s not like that, I%u2019ll show you.%u201D
So, Hardelicious led his old mom down to his computer thinking to himself: %u201Cshit, what could the internet possibly have nothing filthy on%u2026 think%u2026 think%u2026, something fun and innocent, evoking memories of my 1980's childhood... Airwolf!%u201D
Hardelicious proceeded to type into his search-engine of choice the word %u201CAirwolf%u201D and showed the results to his mother, who, unsuspecting, selected an entry from the middle of the list, foolishly trusting to the reputation of British newsprint publications%u2026
Algernon%u2019s Choice: The Airwolf Diaries
Hardelicious%u2019 old mum came down to his house, all in a flutter.
%u201CWhat is this I hear about my son using that filthy den of pornographers and drug-addicts: The Internet,%u201D she shouted while lifting his apartment%u2019s door straight off its hinges.
%u201CWhat, no mom,%u201D Hardelicious protested, as he was backed into a corner under her baleful glare, %u201Cthe internet%u2019s not like that, I%u2019ll show you.%u201D
So, Hardelicious led his old mom down to his computer thinking to himself: %u201Cshit, what could the internet possibly have nothing filthy on%u2026 think%u2026 think%u2026, something fun and innocent, evoking memories of my 1980's childhood... Airwolf!%u201D
Hardelicious proceeded to type into his search-engine of choice the word %u201CAirwolf%u201D and showed the results to his mother, who, unsuspecting, selected an entry from the middle of the list, foolishly trusting to the reputation of British newsprint publications%u2026
hardelicious
+2 -0
You nailed it. Except in my version, there were a few more percentages.
You nailed it. Except in my version, there were a few more percentages.
algernon
+0 -0
I have no idea what did that... sometimes assetbarf just happens (baddum-ching).
I have no idea what did that... sometimes assetbarf just happens (baddum-ching).
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
I%u2019m fairly sure that someone said it%u2019s to do with copying and pasting from Word.
And if this post comes out weird it%u2019s because I just copied and pasted it from Word.
I%u2019m fairly sure that someone said it%u2019s to do with copying and pasting from Word.
And if this post comes out weird it%u2019s because I just copied and pasted it from Word.
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
Et voila!
Et voila!
algernon
+0 -0
Fuck Word so #%U29349#@#^$%*#((ing much!
Fuck Word so #%U29349#@#^$%*#((ing much!
blueloggy
+0 -0
Seriously, why are people writing their comments in Word and then pasting them in here? Assetbar HATES that shit. Why not go ahead and compose your message on the fly, in here? Or use Text Edit or your Windows equivalent (if there is one, which now that I think of it, there probably isn't.)
Seriously, why are people writing their comments in Word and then pasting them in here? Assetbar HATES that shit. Why not go ahead and compose your message on the fly, in here? Or use Text Edit or your Windows equivalent (if there is one, which now that I think of it, there probably isn't.)
hbaranov
+0 -0
EMACS or KWrite...
*tallies his new nerd rating*
Oh god...
EMACS or KWrite...
*tallies his new nerd rating*
Oh god...
cromar
+0 -0
Dude, he said Windows not X Windows! Windows' is Notepad.
*steals your tallies*
Dude, he said Windows not X Windows! Windows' is Notepad.
*steals your tallies*
hbaranov
+0 -0
I knew that. I was stating my options... *steals them right back, and then cries, knowing I'll die a virgin*
I knew that. I was stating my options... *steals them right back, and then cries, knowing I'll die a virgin*
maximus
+0 -0
no date for you.
no date for you.
hardelicious
+0 -0
Actually, this reminds me of the final scene in "Big Fish," where it's not at all what happened, but it is exactly what happened.
Actually, this reminds me of the final scene in "Big Fish," where it's not at all what happened, but it is exactly what happened.
irondave
+1 -0
I would have been sooooo much smarter to register with a Psychiatric Service instead of ending up with that stupid Wedgwood we use once a year.
I would have been sooooo much smarter to register with a Psychiatric Service instead of ending up with that stupid Wedgwood we use once a year.
drsprinkl
+1 -2
just pointing out that beef and molly are tying the note exactly one year after beef's accidentaly proposal
which is also exactly on my BIRTHDAY. BOO YAH BITCHES.
just pointing out that beef and molly are tying the note exactly one year after beef's accidentaly proposal
which is also exactly on my BIRTHDAY. BOO YAH BITCHES.
deusoma
+0 -0
Happy Birthday, person I do not know.
Happy Birthday, person I do not know.
missbee
+0 -0
(*knot)
But great use of idoms, and congrats on the birthday.
I wish something cool happened in Achewood on my birthday.
(*knot)
But great use of idoms, and congrats on the birthday.
I wish something cool happened in Achewood on my birthday.
thegoodwillgirl
+0 -0
The Invention of Photoshop brought to you by Roomba happened on my birthday.
I give thanks to my parents for procreating at the Thanksgivingtimes.
The Invention of Photoshop brought to you by Roomba happened on my birthday.
I give thanks to my parents for procreating at the Thanksgivingtimes.
aliiis
+0 -0
Huh, I just checked, my birthday has had Lie Bot explaining the clitoris, Ultra Peanut picking FeeReep frower, and the rather lovely THE PIECE OF SHIT THAT IS DANGLING FROM THE WORLD'S ASSHOLE? YOU SEMINAL TURD! YOU PISS FOUNTAIN! YOU'RE TEACHING THE FUTURE TO SUCK AND THE CHILDREN TO SWALLOW! , which I think was quite special indeed.
Huh, I just checked, my birthday has had Lie Bot explaining the clitoris, Ultra Peanut picking FeeReep frower, and the rather lovely THE PIECE OF SHIT THAT IS DANGLING FROM THE WORLD'S ASSHOLE? YOU SEMINAL TURD! YOU PISS FOUNTAIN! YOU'RE TEACHING THE FUTURE TO SUCK AND THE CHILDREN TO SWALLOW! , which I think was quite special indeed.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
My birthday got skipped twice, and the only decent strip that ran on it was "The Devil's Drink Book". I hate days like my birthday.
My birthday got skipped twice, and the only decent strip that ran on it was "The Devil's Drink Book". I hate days like my birthday.
octafish
+0 -0
For my birthday I was given "Ray's Perpetual Motion Device" the final strip of the "Great Outdoor Fight" and "Gary Sinise Will Not Be In This Gay Porn".
For my birthday I was given "Ray's Perpetual Motion Device" the final strip of the "Great Outdoor Fight" and "Gary Sinise Will Not Be In This Gay Porn".
falseprophet
+0 -0
On my birthday, Roast Beef got shot , Philippe learned how to be a terrorist (while drinking his King piss in the hood) , Roast Beef expressed misgivings about investing in a company. What? Oh a death company , Ray looked sourly upon Mexican Magical Realist wine served by a damn skeleton , and El Grito de Dolores shouted down the Spanish oppressors.
No wonder no one ever comes to my parties. They're all dead.
On my birthday, Roast Beef got shot , Philippe learned how to be a terrorist (while drinking his King piss in the hood) , Roast Beef expressed misgivings about investing in a company. What? Oh a death company , Ray looked sourly upon Mexican Magical Realist wine served by a damn skeleton , and El Grito de Dolores shouted down the Spanish oppressors.
No wonder no one ever comes to my parties. They're all dead.
hamscout
+0 -0
Dammit. All I've got on my birthday is 2002's "College #" (the Wednesday where storylines went to die), and 2003 , where Lie Bot tries to give Roast Beef romantic advice during his "Queer Eye for the Achewood guy" makeover, but ends up creeping him out (not bad).
There are a bunch of weekdays that CO skipped, so it seems that my birthday is often a day of rest for him. But he better have something good for me this year (back to Wednesday again) or else! I had a kickass, really-relevant Dilbert fall on my day, but I don't want that to be the only coincidentally funny strip on my birthday. I need meaning! From a strip on the INTERNET!!
Dammit. All I've got on my birthday is 2002's "College #" (the Wednesday where storylines went to die), and 2003 , where Lie Bot tries to give Roast Beef romantic advice during his "Queer Eye for the Achewood guy" makeover, but ends up creeping him out (not bad).
There are a bunch of weekdays that CO skipped, so it seems that my birthday is often a day of rest for him. But he better have something good for me this year (back to Wednesday again) or else! I had a kickass, really-relevant Dilbert fall on my day, but I don't want that to be the only coincidentally funny strip on my birthday. I need meaning! From a strip on the INTERNET!!
mira
+0 -0
I've got [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uuaWphRvH"]Liebot's ass[/url], [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua5bl6zH"]Will you be my girlfriend Molly[/url], [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uuagdMKGr"]Leopold, brother of Lazarus[/url], [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua3mw94S"]Say good stuff about Ray's dick[/url], and [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua316FPd"]Ray's penance.[/url]
I am pretty contented with all of this.
I've got [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uuaWphRvH"]Liebot's ass[/url], [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua5bl6zH"]Will you be my girlfriend Molly[/url], [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uuagdMKGr"]Leopold, brother of Lazarus[/url], [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua3mw94S"]Say good stuff about Ray's dick[/url], and [url="https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua316FPd"]Ray's penance.[/url]
I am pretty contented with all of this.
mira
+0 -0
OH FAIL
This is so very embarrassing.
OH FAIL
This is so very embarrassing.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
You are truly blessed - the first one of those is my all-time favorite.
You are truly blessed - the first one of those is my all-time favorite.
snidedk
+0 -0
Falseprophet, your birthday is awesome. It is also mine.
Falseprophet, your birthday is awesome. It is also mine.
hbaranov
+0 -0
HA You have to share...
HA You have to share...
octafish
+0 -0
VII(a) and VII(b) do not bode well for a happy marriage. A wife likes to dance with her spouse. Resentment grows, hardships start. I see dance lessons or divorce on the horizon.
VII(a) and VII(b) do not bode well for a happy marriage. A wife likes to dance with her spouse. Resentment grows, hardships start. I see dance lessons or divorce on the horizon.
algernon
+0 -0
Or alternatively a honeymoon in Buones Aires, turning Achewood, temporarily, into a print-form tango musical. Or maybe I should just lay off the hopeugrin?
Or alternatively a honeymoon in Buones Aires, turning Achewood, temporarily, into a print-form tango musical. Or maybe I should just lay off the hopeugrin?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
That would actually be very awesome, like the Bollywood version of Fight Club.
That would actually be very awesome, like the Bollywood version of Fight Club.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
(which is basically exactly how you imagine it would be. Awesome.)
(which is basically exactly how you imagine it would be. Awesome.)
algernon
+0 -0
Apparently there are plans for a Broadway version of Fight Club.
Apparently there are plans for a Broadway version of Fight Club.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yup, with Trent Reznor doing the score.
Yup, with Trent Reznor doing the score.
blueloggy
+0 -0
...wait, really? I am too lazy to Google this to confirm.
...wait, really? I am too lazy to Google this to confirm.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Yes, it is one hundred percent true.
Yes, it is one hundred percent true.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Is this part of the gullible club initiation test? I think I failed.
Is this part of the gullible club initiation test? I think I failed.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
No it actually is true.
There have been off-Broadway productions before, but Palahniuk is seriously teaming up with Reznor to do a Fight Club musical.
I still want to see the Bollywood version of the film.
No it actually is true.
There have been off-Broadway productions before, but Palahniuk is seriously teaming up with Reznor to do a Fight Club musical.
I still want to see the Bollywood version of the film.
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
Were you joking there, or are you actually aware that there is a Bollywood version of Fight Club?
Were you joking there, or are you actually aware that there is a Bollywood version of Fight Club?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
YES I am aware. I'm a big fan of Palahniuk in general, and Fight Club in specific.
Also you had a malformed video ID.
YES I am aware. I'm a big fan of Palahniuk in general, and Fight Club in specific.
Also you had a malformed video ID.
andyfaewatford
+0 -0
Damn, how in hell did that happen? I don't even know what that means.
Let's try this again...
Anyway, call me sceptical, but it looks about as far from Palahniuk as 10 Things I Hate About You was from Shakespeare.
Damn, how in hell did that happen? I don't even know what that means.
Let's try this again...
Anyway, call me sceptical, but it looks about as far from Palahniuk as 10 Things I Hate About You was from Shakespeare.
nosearmy
+0 -0
Does anyone else see this program undergoing pretty much total transformation once Molly sees it?
If this were to be the actual ceremony as it went down, there would be no reason to actually show the event itself. No, this idealized Beef wedding is as much a fantasy as his dream of allowing a needy immigrant to use him as a gangplank to the New World.
Does anyone else see this program undergoing pretty much total transformation once Molly sees it?
If this were to be the actual ceremony as it went down, there would be no reason to actually show the event itself. No, this idealized Beef wedding is as much a fantasy as his dream of allowing a needy immigrant to use him as a gangplank to the New World.
hamscout
+0 -0
my wife wouldn't even accept the carefully constructed MAP that I drew for the invitation.
...but that's what I get for marrying a graphic designer.
(I wrote our vows.)
my wife wouldn't even accept the carefully constructed MAP that I drew for the invitation.
...but that's what I get for marrying a graphic designer.
(I wrote our vows.)
contrasoma
+0 -0
Going into pedant mode:
VII(a) should likely be amended to "against ever dancing again". Exhibit A .
Going into pedant mode:
VII(a) should likely be amended to "against ever dancing again". Exhibit A .
coolbreeze3
+0 -0
This strip makes me :). . . not to be confused with :(
This strip makes me :). . . not to be confused with :(
hedonismbot
+0 -0
It doesn't make you fart? Did we ever have a consensus on what the opposite of that was?
It doesn't make you fart? Did we ever have a consensus on what the opposite of that was?
professorhazard
+4 -0
It makes her inhale gas through her anus.
It makes her inhale gas through her anus.
deusoma
+2 -0
Worst superpower ever.
Worst superpower ever.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
I must say you are in fine form today Prof. Working some excellent chuckles across the board.
I must say you are in fine form today Prof. Working some excellent chuckles across the board.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Some gentle chuckles indeed.
Some gentle chuckles indeed.
professorhazard
+0 -0
I have known it since I was twelve.
I have known it since I was twelve.
spaceseeker51
+1 -0
Macy's Bridal Registry entry: Rollerskates, Has 0, Needs 2.
Macy's Bridal Registry entry: Rollerskates, Has 0, Needs 2.
mr_lostman28
+0 -0
That is the most disturbing avatar picture I've seen on here. and you are in some tough competition.
Congratulations, you sick, sick man.
That is the most disturbing avatar picture I've seen on here. and you are in some tough competition.
Congratulations, you sick, sick man.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
An audacious beginning to the most important story arc of our age. I feel honoured, and humbled, in that order.
An audacious beginning to the most important story arc of our age. I feel honoured, and humbled, in that order.
nhennies
+4 -0
Oh man, this is gonna be even bigger news than the Kermit/Piggy wedding.
Oh man, this is gonna be even bigger news than the Kermit/Piggy wedding.
hbaranov
+2 -0
And the offspring less disturbing.
And the offspring less disturbing.
henrythecad
+0 -0
I'd put up 350$ for the Les Paul, depending on a couple of things i'd need to check out first. But anything to help out the marriage, and score a cheap Les at that.
Although i'm surprised.. i thought Rickenbackers got all the love here.
I'd put up 350$ for the Les Paul, depending on a couple of things i'd need to check out first. But anything to help out the marriage, and score a cheap Les at that.
Although i'm surprised.. i thought Rickenbackers got all the love here.
joebot
+0 -0
are you kidding? $350 for a 1959 GIBSON les paul? I'd offer at least six hundo.
are you kidding? $350 for a 1959 GIBSON les paul? I'd offer at least six hundo.
ortsac
+0 -0
Six hundred dollars is class money, apparently.
Six hundred dollars is class money, apparently.
henrythecad
+0 -0
Nope. 350 tops. I ain't payin' over 400 for a factory-made, no wonder what year it's from.
Nope. 350 tops. I ain't payin' over 400 for a factory-made, no wonder what year it's from.
kombatmedik
+0 -0
I'm getting married myself in September, and just looked at invitations last night
I wish my fiance would let me do this. think of the $ saved....
I'm getting married myself in September, and just looked at invitations last night
I wish my fiance would let me do this. think of the $ saved....
margargaret
+1 -0
Roast Beef thinks that the symbol for paragraph is a cool decorative element.
Apparently, it is called a "pilcrow". I looked it up!
Roast Beef thinks that the symbol for paragraph is a cool decorative element.
Apparently, it is called a "pilcrow". I looked it up!
professorhazard
+0 -0
So did schroduck, six hours ago.
So did schroduck, six hours ago.
margargaret
+2 -0
Well. God damn it. This is what I get for posting when I suck.
Well. God damn it. This is what I get for posting when I suck.
professorhazard
+0 -0
You're all right, man. You're all right.
You're all right, man. You're all right.
boingjones
+0 -0
Will a chubby make it all better?
Will a chubby make it all better?
pogo
+0 -0
Thanks, but I think I'll stick with "paragraph mark."
Thanks, but I think I'll stick with "paragraph mark."
sleepyhead
+0 -0
i take hopeugrin everyday...its wierd cause it makes me feel great but everyone else around me sick.
i take hopeugrin everyday...its wierd cause it makes me feel great but everyone else around me sick.
daidai
+0 -0
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua1pghHz
Roast Beef not the drugs, that's skipping panels!
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
https://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uua1pghHz
Roast Beef not the drugs, that's skipping panels!
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
fuzzyrobot
+1 -0
It's my birthday!
It's my birthday!
autrepoupee
+1 -0
happy birthday!
happy birthday!
howl
+0 -0
Many happy returns of the day.
Many happy returns of the day.
davey-boy
+0 -0
I wonder about the context about Beef requesting Ray not to take a smoke break in the middle of his recitation. I he concerned about Ray's chronic smoking, or whethor Ray may stop three lines in, and take a dramatic pause to light a cigarette before finishing, which Beef would just find to be lame.
I wonder about the context about Beef requesting Ray not to take a smoke break in the middle of his recitation. I he concerned about Ray's chronic smoking, or whethor Ray may stop three lines in, and take a dramatic pause to light a cigarette before finishing, which Beef would just find to be lame.
squares
+0 -0
I believe that request for no smoke break is for everyone, not Ray.
I believe that request for no smoke break is for everyone, not Ray.
king_duncan
+0 -0
That didn't even occur to me, but now that you point it out, it seems to be The Truth.
That didn't even occur to me, but now that you point it out, it seems to be The Truth.
evolume
+0 -0
I POST FUNNY OBSERVATION
I POST FUNNY OBSERVATION
mr_lostman28
+0 -0
I OFFER V-CHUB BECAUSE YOU SO FAR DOWN PAGE
I OFFER V-CHUB BECAUSE YOU SO FAR DOWN PAGE
pogo
+0 -0
NO YOU DON'T
NO YOU DON'T
irondave
+0 -0
do you have a link?
do you have a link?
yomimono
+2 -0
Anyone into the idea of Achewood gatherings on July 5th? A bunch of us could get together and stare at the floor, drinks in our hands, all mumblin' lines from the comic at one another.
Anyone into the idea of Achewood gatherings on July 5th? A bunch of us could get together and stare at the floor, drinks in our hands, all mumblin' lines from the comic at one another.
pogo
+0 -0
Sorry, I'll be in Montreal on a vacation with my significant other. Of course, if you hold the Ass-Union in Montreal, we're there.
Sorry, I'll be in Montreal on a vacation with my significant other. Of course, if you hold the Ass-Union in Montreal, we're there.
davey-boy
+0 -0
Hot piss! I will be in Montreal with my little brother!
Hot piss! I will be in Montreal with my little brother!
pogo
+0 -0
Le festival du jazz, mon ami?
Le festival du jazz, mon ami?
hamscout
+0 -0
no--he'll be pissing on his little brother!
Pay attention Pogo!
oui oui!
no--he'll be pissing on his little brother!
Pay attention Pogo!
oui oui!
pogo
+0 -0
Quesque se le PISS?
Quesque se le PISS?
achilleselbow
+0 -0
I know the misspelling is part of the joke, but I just wanted to chime in with a tangentially relevant comment rather than correct anyone. The actual phrase is "Qu'est-ce que c'est?" which literally means "What is this that this is?" and contains about twice as many syllables as are pronounced. What the hell, French people.
I know the misspelling is part of the joke, but I just wanted to chime in with a tangentially relevant comment rather than correct anyone. The actual phrase is "Qu'est-ce que c'est?" which literally means "What is this that this is?" and contains about twice as many syllables as are pronounced. What the hell, French people.
charchar
+2 -0
I am about to do a wrong thing "est-ce que" is like a verbal question mark in French, devoid of any literal meaning, like when people say like, like, you know? and it makes no logical sense but it's understood to imply a question. Alternatively you can tack on "n'est-ce pas?" as the end of your sentence, but doing this too much will mark you as one who has not mastered the art of inversion, which is basically "Verb-object?" and will probably lead to death by penny-farthing bicycle to the eye socket.
"Le plus que tu sais!"
I am about to do a wrong thing "est-ce que" is like a verbal question mark in French, devoid of any literal meaning, like when people say like, like, you know? and it makes no logical sense but it's understood to imply a question. Alternatively you can tack on "n'est-ce pas?" as the end of your sentence, but doing this too much will mark you as one who has not mastered the art of inversion, which is basically "Verb-object?" and will probably lead to death by penny-farthing bicycle to the eye socket.
"Le plus que tu sais!"
charchar
+0 -0
Charchar: molesting the internet with her nerdery since grade-school.
Accident-Free For 83 Days.
Charchar: molesting the internet with her nerdery since grade-school.
Accident-Free For 83 Days.
catgrl131
+0 -0
*knocks over a chair*
*smacks forehead and resets accident counter*
*knocks over a chair*
*smacks forehead and resets accident counter*
davey-boy
+0 -0
Chubbied for pic of that god damned pineapple thing I was subjected to in public school.
Chubbied for pic of that god damned pineapple thing I was subjected to in public school.
pogo
+0 -0
Merci. (I am going to let the woman in my life do all the talking when we are in Montreal. I will just do an occasional joke by trying to speak French.)
Merci. (I am going to let the woman in my life do all the talking when we are in Montreal. I will just do an occasional joke by trying to speak French.)
pogo
+0 -0
Really, French people, too many vowels and stuff you don't even pronounce!
Really, French people, too many vowels and stuff you don't even pronounce!
davey-boy
+0 -0
Absolutely. Truth be told, I was 'coerced' into taking leave at that time, thus making the best of a situation.
Absolutely. Truth be told, I was 'coerced' into taking leave at that time, thus making the best of a situation.
irondave
+0 -0
sounds great!
sounds great!
charchar
+0 -0
I will be in Alabama, visiting my mom. Could this thing be in Alabama so i can be all "look, don't cry i have friends ?"
I will be in Alabama, visiting my mom. Could this thing be in Alabama so i can be all "look, don't cry i have friends ?"
achilleselbow
+1 -0
I think your mom would cry even more if she met us.
I think your mom would cry even more if she met us.
invidious
+0 -0
I wouldn't introduce you all to my mom in a hundred years. In fact, I've already taken out a pre-emptive restraining order against everyone on Assetbar on her behalf. Including me.
I wouldn't introduce you all to my mom in a hundred years. In fact, I've already taken out a pre-emptive restraining order against everyone on Assetbar on her behalf. Including me.
hedonismbot
+1 -0
That's odd, I'll be in Alabama too, visiting your mom. I'll give her everyone's regards. During sex.
That's odd, I'll be in Alabama too, visiting your mom. I'll give her everyone's regards. During sex.
maximus
+0 -0
hedonismbot is vyin for the title Assetbar's Glen Quagmire.
(I know, you already have my mom's vote)
hedonismbot is vyin for the title Assetbar's Glen Quagmire.
(I know, you already have my mom's vote)
kamet
+0 -2
(giggety giggety)
(giggety giggety)
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Last I heard you mother was voting for loneal. What the fuck is up with that?
Last I heard you mother was voting for loneal. What the fuck is up with that?
maximus
+0 -0
she's.........DEAD!
she's.........DEAD!
maximus
+0 -0
not really
not really
hbaranov
+0 -0
And again, I fail gullible club initiation. Damn my cynicism
And again, I fail gullible club initiation. Damn my cynicism
loneal
+0 -0
Most moms vote for me. Even the dead ones.
(The joke is that I satisfy them sexually.)
(Even the dead ones.)
Most moms vote for me. Even the dead ones.
(The joke is that I satisfy them sexually.)
(Even the dead ones.)
desert_donkey
+0 -0
a 5 fo' shiggidy.
"I am the graphic designer of the AGE".. classick.
a 5 fo' shiggidy.
"I am the graphic designer of the AGE".. classick.
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
Wait, did Chris Onstad accept an ignatz award in a gorilla costume? Awesome.
I apologise if this is old gnus to anyone else but this is certainly gnus to me.
Wait, did Chris Onstad accept an ignatz award in a gorilla costume? Awesome.
I apologise if this is old gnus to anyone else but this is certainly gnus to me.
desert_donkey
+0 -0
gorilla costumes: they will never go out of style.
gorilla costumes: they will never go out of style.
squares
+0 -0
Ü
Ü
curmudgy
+2 -0
I want you to know that I am a girl who just spent a week on an unglaciated plateau in a cabin without electricity or heat, alone, for a week, and there are things written on my arm, a victor hugo quote I wanted to remember incase I ever get a tattoo (but I wouldnt do it on my arm probably) "in the same way as birds make nests of anything, children make dolls of no matter what,"--- this strip made me laugh so hard I almost choked on my applesauce, I wept.
Thank you God for this strip and eyes for me to see it with.
I want you to know that I am a girl who just spent a week on an unglaciated plateau in a cabin without electricity or heat, alone, for a week, and there are things written on my arm, a victor hugo quote I wanted to remember incase I ever get a tattoo (but I wouldnt do it on my arm probably) "in the same way as birds make nests of anything, children make dolls of no matter what,"--- this strip made me laugh so hard I almost choked on my applesauce, I wept.
Thank you God for this strip and eyes for me to see it with.
cromar
+0 -0
DAMN
DAMN
cromar
+0 -0
I retract this picture.
I retract this picture.
cromar
+0 -0
Or I mean... damn BBCode! Yeah... that is certainly believable...
Or I mean... damn BBCode! Yeah... that is certainly believable...
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Were you, um, trying to use and umlaut or something?
Were you, um, trying to use and umlaut or something?
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
If you try to use an umlaut assetbar should give you a big GAME OVER screen with a pixellated skull.
If you try to use an umlaut assetbar should give you a big GAME OVER screen with a pixellated skull.
maximus
+0 -0
Here endeth the lesson.
Here endeth the lesson.
crinklebat
+0 -0
The arc of Roast Beef planning his wedding is literally the only thing that keeps me sane while planning my wedding. I just ordered my invites today and told my fiance gleefully about the idea of auctioning off a collectible guitar in the wedding. He reneged...but a girl can dream.
The arc of Roast Beef planning his wedding is literally the only thing that keeps me sane while planning my wedding. I just ordered my invites today and told my fiance gleefully about the idea of auctioning off a collectible guitar in the wedding. He reneged...but a girl can dream.
mortshire
+0 -0
Man, a lot of these comments are pretty negative. Beef and Molly are getting married, guys! Lighten up! And have a good weekend!
Man, a lot of these comments are pretty negative. Beef and Molly are getting married, guys! Lighten up! And have a good weekend!
catgrl131
+1 -0
Aww, thanks! You too!
Aww, thanks! You too!
pogo
+0 -0
Sweet, three days of adding to this stream of drivel! Maybe we can top the 2,000 of the Great HandFace strip. I'll leave it up to you kids, I've got some travel and stuff to do. Play nice!
Sweet, three days of adding to this stream of drivel! Maybe we can top the 2,000 of the Great HandFace strip. I'll leave it up to you kids, I've got some travel and stuff to do. Play nice!
jthm_guitarist
+0 -0
I'll bid on the Les Paul
I'll bid on the Les Paul
namdnas
+0 -0
This bargirl just looked at this with me and said it should've been sent yesterday if it's expected to arrive at homes on Friday or Saturday of Memorial Day weekend. "Sun and Mon are Postal Holidays. I mean, like, Macy's Memorial Day Sale, Come on!"
Wow.
This bargirl just looked at this with me and said it should've been sent yesterday if it's expected to arrive at homes on Friday or Saturday of Memorial Day weekend. "Sun and Mon are Postal Holidays. I mean, like, Macy's Memorial Day Sale, Come on!"
Wow.
alreadyinuse2
+0 -1
so yeah man, i thought the u.s. sucked, but now in norway, it's like, a whole different perspective on how much it sucks. and how it sucks. what a waste.
so yeah man, i thought the u.s. sucked, but now in norway, it's like, a whole different perspective on how much it sucks. and how it sucks. what a waste.
xiaomimi
+2 -0
falseprophet
+0 -0
That's Yelena from Transmetropolitan.
I know Yelena.
I know her.
That's Yelena from Transmetropolitan.
I know Yelena.
I know her.
yearsinhotclaws
+3 -0
loneal
+0 -0
Oh dang, look at you, all nestled in the bosom of America, holding your soda as far from Scandinavia as possible.
Oh dang, look at you, all nestled in the bosom of America, holding your soda as far from Scandinavia as possible.
hbaranov
+0 -0
IT IS COMING FOR YOUR SODAAAA
IT IS COMING FOR YOUR SODAAAA
cromar
+1 -0
AAAAHHHHH!!! Wait a minute... I am pretty sure I am drinking my Dr. Pepper faster than continental drift.
AAAAHHHHH!!! Wait a minute... I am pretty sure I am drinking my Dr. Pepper faster than continental drift.
catgrl131
+1 -0
Oh lordy, at this moment I too am partaking of a Dr. Pepper
Please be actually drinking one right now so we can be BFFs Forever
Oh lordy, at this moment I too am partaking of a Dr. Pepper
Please be actually drinking one right now so we can be BFFs Forever
cromar
+0 -0
I just drank the rest of mine as I scrolled to this comment . (For real... what a coincidence.)
I just drank the rest of mine as I scrolled to this comment . (For real... what a coincidence.)
catgrl131
+1 -0
I love how just somewhere in the world, two people who know each other only by virtue of internet, are enjoying the same delicious beverage at the same time
Truly the world is a magnificent place.
I love how just somewhere in the world, two people who know each other only by virtue of internet, are enjoying the same delicious beverage at the same time
Truly the world is a magnificent place.
scura
+3 -0
i hear "parades go by" by the magnetic fields playing at some time during their wedding.
i hear "parades go by" by the magnetic fields playing at some time during their wedding.
pygmalion00
+1 -0
I'll linger here
your ring upon my finger dear...
I'll linger here
your ring upon my finger dear...
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
You know that strip you really like, that you can't figure out why anyone would rate below a five? I'm the guy who gave it a four. Because this is what I save my fives for.
You know that strip you really like, that you can't figure out why anyone would rate below a five? I'm the guy who gave it a four. Because this is what I save my fives for.
lereya
+0 -0
Molly and Roast Beef will be getting married on my birthday. I feel a theme party coming.
Molly and Roast Beef will be getting married on my birthday. I feel a theme party coming.
ultimatio
+0 -0
God I hope this wedding doesn't turn beef into That Guy.
God I hope this wedding doesn't turn beef into That Guy.
catgrl131
+1 -0
That Guy Who Sucks Plus He Got Depressionn?
That Guy Who Sucks Plus He Got Depressionn?
achilleselbow
+0 -0
The guy who wears the shirt of the band he's going to see?
The guy who flashes the 'rock on' sign in every photo, even when completely inappropriate?
The guy who has to mention that he doesn't watch TV every time that someone else brings up anything about it?
You have to be more specific about these things.
The guy who wears the shirt of the band he's going to see?
The guy who flashes the 'rock on' sign in every photo, even when completely inappropriate?
The guy who has to mention that he doesn't watch TV every time that someone else brings up anything about it?
You have to be more specific about these things.
professorhazard
+0 -0
Lyle, Lyle, and Pat. Aww, almost had a Lyle jackpot!***
***A slot machine.
Lyle, Lyle, and Pat. Aww, almost had a Lyle jackpot!***
***A slot machine.
octafish
+0 -0
Ha! I thought of alreadyinuse for the last one!
Ha! I thought of alreadyinuse for the last one!
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Alreadyinuse is the new Pat. This much is evident.
Alreadyinuse is the new Pat. This much is evident.
hbaranov
+0 -0
But, he is real, which makes his pathetic behaviour even more funny
But, he is real, which makes his pathetic behaviour even more funny
straw
+0 -0
Asherdan will be so disappointed that he's been usurped. But I don't care.
Asherdan will be so disappointed that he's been usurped. But I don't care.
envika
+0 -0
whatever happened to manflesh's "asherdan appreciation week", that looked like a fun thing to be involved in
and i think that alreadyinuse once said that he got so many lames that he lost his ability to post
whatever happened to manflesh's "asherdan appreciation week", that looked like a fun thing to be involved in
and i think that alreadyinuse once said that he got so many lames that he lost his ability to post
disaster
+0 -1
damn, a percoset for every one of mollys periods for the year
clever
damn, a percoset for every one of mollys periods for the year
clever
professorhazard
+0 -0
Wouldn't a cat have them more often?
Wouldn't a cat have them more often?
envika
+0 -0
why should they?
why should they?
loneal
+0 -0
Different animals have different menstruation cycles! Wikipedia doesn't tell me about cats', though. It just says they are polyestrous.
Different animals have different menstruation cycles! Wikipedia doesn't tell me about cats', though. It just says they are polyestrous.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
These tampons are 100% polyestrous!
These tampons are 100% polyestrous!
loneal
+0 -0
I want nothing more than to go off on a tangent about awesome feminine hygiene products right now, but I'm keeping myself in check.
I want nothing more than to go off on a tangent about awesome feminine hygiene products right now, but I'm keeping myself in check.
catgrl131
+1 -0
No, please, continue!
No, please, continue!
nickgranger
+0 -0
anyone got a HEARTBEATZZ avatar yet?
anyone got a HEARTBEATZZ avatar yet?
professorhazard
+0 -0
If you have it better, it doesn't matter!
If you have it better, it doesn't matter!
caddon
+0 -0
Molly's gift is occasionally having a husband who'll go for a walk around the lake with her without wondering if any children drowned in that black water, all face down, mother on her knees just crying her soul to death nearby. Dang...
Molly's gift is occasionally having a husband who'll go for a walk around the lake with her without wondering if any children drowned in that black water, all face down, mother on her knees just crying her soul to death nearby. Dang...
sagoon
+0 -0
Ms. Lady will be upset and have an acid tummy all night.
Ms. Lady will be upset and have an acid tummy all night.
sagoon
+0 -0
Ms. Lady will be upset and have an acid tummy all night.
Ms. Lady will be upset and have an acid tummy all night.
atypicaloracle
+0 -0
I almost expected Todd to be in the program following the Best Man as "Crappy Little Bullshit Man" but "Worst Man" has the advantage of being succinct.
I almost expected Todd to be in the program following the Best Man as "Crappy Little Bullshit Man" but "Worst Man" has the advantage of being succinct.
A comment left by shades was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, americanadiano, JimTS, banjothepony, theuberwalrus, TripperDay, meddle, facehead, madnes, apocowarg, beansdooma, ppccd, dangelder, riotdejaneiro, laine, Dusty, cryztal, Unfun, mikeronomicon, waddie, gladi8orrex, Thorfinn, Hipjiverobot, sean1058, zeta, NeoNaoNeo, glorify, Yossarian, EM2, Vice, 7th_shot, aargh, Steerpike66, twohundredninety, jake11, softerworld, cmjhogan, Sn0wman, sassacrass, StagnantDisplay, LordHumungus, GMM, Courtland, talgkjertel, atypicaloracle, rascaldom, Broahsaurus, prius_chaser, dullard, Koremora, jollysaintpete, mikeleffel2, TheLoneliestMonkey, robbingdog, NDCaesar, GitarooMan, skoora, milkpants, MortisInvictus, hellaurie, Tweakzers, Crev_Gibax, coffeecoaster, GreenHeron, DougTheHead, HolyQ, ABC_Heidi, Vee, RedGuy, luckypyjamas, retardedgenius, aHatOfPig, likeiwassaying, newwavepony, Scorpion13, Ihmgard, troutman, RogueCheddar, RicNine, Fcannon, gardenhead_, agentstinky, Jeef, harry, LexSenthur, Tragic_Johnson, nutmeg, sje46, dzieger, Boyd, joebot, Ravigotte, Qatmandu, ellwooda, retinarow, anitrophaeron, littlefatdog, perhapsmaybe, clintisiceman, goopotato, campincarl, hardelicious, soupkaty, greyfield, colorlessness, billygoatbiker, Panserbjorne, Mastronaut, jwinehou, Dallovich, king_duncan, morbo, Pigs, ISeeDeadPixels, RedSalesperson, kestral, kb, Hanrahahanrahan)
A comment left by spacedaddy was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ted0phile, JimTS, straw, riotdejaneiro, flaxplus, bobdeedoo, Deusoma, EM2, synnah, flazisismuss, falseprophet, softerworld, odaya, atypicaloracle, Rubber_Baron, loneal, MortisInvictus, shades, likeiwassaying, LexSenthur, hbaranov, Tashara, Doc_Rostov, wingspan, Audhumla, hardelicious, colorlessness, Appers, jwest27, kestral)
A comment left by hanrahahanrahan was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by StoatLad, CapnMurphy, TheLoneliestMonkey, dasilodavi, RogueCheddar, Tashara, Audhumla, smooveb, colorlessness, Appers)
This comment gets a chubby and 30 minutes in The Kayak.
A comment left by professorhazard was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, blastradius, joeynarcotic, dasilodavi, Appers)
A comment left by sortelli was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, BilliousBill, lawbot, professorhazard, mikeronomicon, falseprophet, baabaa, MortisInvictus, atticusonline, Crater12, likeiwassaying, achilleselbow)
You sure do post here a lot, for someone who's so against it.
A comment left by sortelli was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, Fuyukodachi, daidai, professorhazard, mikeronomicon, falseprophet, baabaa, TheEscapist, MortisInvictus, DougTheHead, Crater12, likeiwassaying, mystkmanat, midgetron)
Sounds rewarding. I hope a squirrel stabs you at a party you assume you are invited to.
Sortelli u think jus tlike me we r so aovbe thsese stupid sheeple and thieyre controlling system of good s and lames hifive from me bro and keep on fighting the sheeple hive brain yo \m/\m/\m/
even if that was facetious, it was still lame.
A comment left by sortelli was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by daidai, mikeronomicon, falseprophet, atticusonline, likeiwassaying, mystkmanat, cromar)
Oh, man, I hope you get bitten by a Blast-Ended Skrewt! *High Five!*
A comment left by wittyname was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Zilcho, Firehawk, surviveinc, likeiwassaying, mrblank91)
Your mother dropped you on your head, didn't she? Or are you and Asherdan related? You sound a lot like him. Perhaps the best part of you also ran down your mother's leg.
hypocrisy is a boring sin
I like having this dude around. While his view of the board as being utterly passive-aggressive - enjoying a sort of sado-masochistic alternation between loving and hating each other - may or may not actually be more pronounced than in common human social interaction, I find his aggression refreshing and entertainingly biting without being over the top.
Well, right now, at least. Might just be the mood I'm in, I dunno.
I believe sortelli's angle is performance art, like gladi8orrex. Everybody wants their fifteen minutes, but not everybody wants to slave over a hot computer monitor all day to get it. It is the new blight of our age, a gift from his Boomer parents who told him he was the most special kid in the world.
sortelli is the better man.
Yay, my lame allotment is back! And just in time too!
A comment left by gormster was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, Mangtastic, likeiwassaying)
Sorry. I shall strive to be more worthy of your lames in the future.
Guys, guys, my lame allotment is deep enough for the both of you!
soon bragging about lame allotment is going to become the assetbar equivalent of bragging about penis size.
Sooo....Lames are the new chubbies?
Just the opposite!
I don't know about that man, but I do know that I've done my damnedest to get that "outta lames!" message and it's just not worked out.
But come on, it's not about the size of your lame allotment, it's about how you use it!
Oh mercy I'm sorry that was way too obvious and easy
I have a penis, and it has many sizes. I have way more sizes to my penis than you.
Looking back at this now, I can honestly admit I was wrong - bragging about laming someone is indeed lame, and I myself have been annoyed at people for doing so on other occasions. The intent wasn't really to brag - I was actually genuinely and pleasantly surprised upon clicking lame and not getting the 'do something nice' message, but in retrospect I should have kept it to myself. However, to paraphrase Churchill, I can admit I'm wrong the next day, but sortelli will always be a douche.
A comment left by neonaoneo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Mangtastic, OnePaperTiger, pogo)
c'mon you were doing so good man, don't get like how you were in old times
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm lame chubby wank mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
A comment left by hbaranov was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by nbgreene, JimTS, mikeronomicon, sean1058, _cheesekayke, TheLoneliestMonkey, milkpants, RogueCheddar, Tragic_Johnson, nathanielperson, colorlessness, I_Love_Kate)
Chubby for the Brass Eye reference.
Cthulu - friend in times of need.
Cthulu raped my grandmother you skullfuck !
My entire family was killed by being a dick to a stranger, you filbert!
Two of my assetbar acquqaintances died of tentacle-related injuries after misspelling "Cthulhu".
A comment left by steev_dayv was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by jfenserty, RedGuy, DropkickHuie)
You implication that just because I Japanese I like watch tentacle rape activity very racist and bad.
contrasoma's wife is in a tentacle-related coma.
Oh Shiiiiiiiiiit!
I'm German and hella turned-on right now.
Really? DId someone accidentally shit themselves during all that tentacle raping perhaps?
I get turned on by imagining Japanese people getting turned on by tentacle rape.
I get turned on by imagining German people shitting themselves as a result of Japanese people getting aroused by tentacle rape. This is my only fetish and damn is it hard to orchestrate.
Have you tried pretending to be Italian (if you aren't already)and inviting said parties over for a Tripartite lunch? If that doesn't work.. mention a "three-way pact".
I gave that a chubby I never thought I'd have a chance to give.
What's it like to see your whole family die
i wonder if my mom knows...
spacedaddy, there is not easy way to put this, so I'm just gonna lay it out there.
Will you be the worst man at my wedding?
Spacedaddy makes a Brass Eye reference and gets lamed; O'Hanraha-Hanrahan and echidnaboy do the same and are lauded. The Assetfolks need to discover Chris Morris, pronto.
I made an Achewood reference the other day, similar in tone to spacedaddy's, and I got seriously lamed. It may be there's a bunch of youngsters here now who've never read the old strips, but I suspect it's the tone, not the source material.
- desperately wants to say "Screw you, echidnaboy! Fuck you!" , but there's just no way to make it funny or relevant.
I think the fact that he misspelled it also suggested that it was a spontaneous outburst rather than some sort of reference. Also, not all of us are either British or Austin, TX-dwelling Anglophiles.
Okay, so now we all have to watch Brass Eye to understand what the flock you're talking about? Can't anyone write anything original from their own thoughts? Must we rely on parrot-like renderings? The ability to memorize stupid lines from obscure shows is NOT going to help you have children.
I saw somebody say that EXACT thing on a show once. Or maybe it was Questionable Content or something. That sounds like something from that godawful strip.
Nice!
I finally looked up Questionable Content today. As expected it was a black hole of laughter where the living envy the dead.
Are you saying that quoting things is an effective contraceptive?
I posit an inverse relationship between the obscurity and frequency of quotes to the companionship of winsome and fertile members of the opposite sex, yes.
UNNNH! UNNGH! UNNNHHHH! *pulls condom off* WE ARE THE NIGHTS WHO SAY NII!!!
Not particularly obscure. You'll need to have her watch at least one episode of Big Train or Twitch City the morning after just to be certain.
Pogo, you have a point. In future I will asterisk any potentially confusing references, and try my best to converse without recourse to pop culture quotations*
*echidnaboy, #achewood, last week (yes, I'm actually quoting myself now, which I know is obscenely meta but it is almost like an original thought)
Speaking of pop culture...
Screenvision, the makers of the pre-movie trivia screens that show at my local movie theater, don't know what pop culture means. Sometimes they show data classifying it as Music Trivia or Movie Trivia, but other times they throw up the Pop Culture colors and tell us such popular culture tidbits as...
- an unrolled french horn would be 26 feet long
- if the heads at Mount Rushmore had bodies, they'd be 500 feet tall
Et cetera. Apparently, someone in charge does not understand the difference between "pop culture" and "inane trivia".
Oh, I forgot a great one:
- the oldest pair of ice skates is 3000 years old.
Pop culture.
I think the Mount Rushmore thing would be a great idea for a B-movie.
Yes, see Mount Rushmore come to life in "Stoneface Killers"!!
That was an episode of Dexter's Lab once... it was a good one.
God I loved Dexter's Lab. I even sat through that one episode where it was just fifteen minutes of Dexter's dad setting up his golf tee.
Man I even downloaded the mp3 of the song "Secrets" by Will.I.Am goddamn I'm a massive nerd
Oh man, I did too What is wrong with me? ^o^
Superman sorta already went there:
Well, I admit, it was really Jim Lee who went there.
An uninteresting series, but the art was cool. I enjoy Jim Lee's stuff, no matter how ridiculously big his ladies' boobies are.
Frank Chu draws good ridiculously large boobies. He seems to understand that they're ridiculous too, but still sexy.
Jim Lee I don't care for. He practically defines the overly muscular, overly detailed nonsense that permeates most superhero art and I don't care for it one bit. He's actually one of my least favorite artists. I'm also having issues with some of the overly scratchy artists working today. If you're not Ben Templesmith I'll kindly ask you to knock it off because I'd like to actually be able to follow what's happening visually.
Are you saying an unravelled French horn, drunk and destitute without a use anymore wouldn't be?
God I hate Screenvision. It's SO annoying when you see it on repeat for 6 hours a day lol.
Some poor slob of a copywriter like me had to write all those, so go easy on him or her. I have written movie slides for our local trade school, something about online classes.
Echidna, my boy, you are a permissable cultural self-reference, even if you do make an asterisk of yourself from time to time.
I don't see why you need to have seen Brass Eye to understand what "you're wrong, and you're a grotesquely ugly freak" means.
You're right, the line was funny without knowning where it came from. But don't you think people are giving too much credit to the poster if they think it is original?
What is it with you and children and fertility? SOMEone is proud of his very common biological imperative, methinks.
I cast my seed on the barren earth, personally. Best place for it.
You can't masturbate until you're outside and in the desert, it is a disorder of sorts
So much grows in the desert, it is not barren here sir. Then again I technically live in a Steppe climate.
It's a nerd/programmer joke from the strip, about not getting too nerdy or you won't have children. But I also do think it is an imperative.
Yeah, Someone was making a similar point on SomethingAwful about how 'All Internet humor is entirely reliant on you recognizing that thing you know, and nothing more.' However, I think that assetbar is generally better than that. Although that's possibly due to the fact that this is one of the few places on the internet I actually bother to go to...
Oh, you read that Onion article too?
[/justforlulz]
Right now, this is my only online forum. What's wrong with me?
Well, mine too. I used to be on a fun one called slimezone, but the website ended up closing down and now the domain belongs to some crappy game site and there's no more forum. Le sigh. But I still keep in touch with the dudes from there, so that's cool.
If it helps prevent me from having children I'm entirely in favor of it. I'll even endeavor to do it more frequently when I'm alone.
wait, you can make out what shades looks like from that tiny picture?
when you post like that, you are an Internet Douche
My cousin died of catastrophic bowel collapse after an overdose of Helpolax. Onstad, your strips are usually funny but this time you have gone TOO FAR. How DARE you.
We are happy to laugh week in and week out at Rays alcoholism and Beefs depression. These are also serious issues that affect a great number of people.
So I dont think we should judge what is on or off limits for comedy based on personal circumstance.
Everything should be fair game.
On another note; I Am truly sory for both your losses and mean no offence by this comment.
Look like you mean it! Look down at the ground and say "sorry".
Next time you cross the road, don't bother looking.
Oh! I re-read your comment and it would seem I have been lampooned! But I assume that shades beef with Beef is serious, so my comment still stands.
I don't see what's so funny about Implosive Bowel Syndrome, you insensitive prick
Yeah, IBS was responsible for over 3 million deaths in Wales alone last year, I can't believe more people don't know about this terrible disease.
Those crazy Welsh. They just love that Helpolax...
Columbo says, "Oh jeez, the Welsh..."
there aren't three million people in wales
My cousin choked to death on a wedding invitation sent by a cartoon cat. This strip is crossing far too many lines.
Chris Onstad straight up murdered me. Like, yesterday.
Onstad and a band of rogue ninjas killed my entire family by forcefeeding them one hundred pills of HopeUgrin each. I came home to find my home ruined and with my mother, father, brother, little sister, and grandmother all lying dead in the dining room, with huge perverse grins on their faces. I'm still grieving over it, and I consider this strip to be cold and heartless. Not funny, not a good strip.
Enjoy your new career as Batman.
My kingdom for another chubby.
Enjoy a v-chub, prof.
It's not too bad actually. But the depression makes me drink more than I should, and Harvey said he's gonna impound the Batmobile if I get pulled over for DWI again.
Joker Virus? I wish we had more of it floating around.
Bone is dead? NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
...boned?
The joke was that Bone is now in the past (as in dead). In retrospect, I don't think it was a very clear and/or good joke. *shrugs*
really? i thought everyone just said "...boned?" at random intervals on this assetbar thing
Well, yeah, the joke was that, for now, it was relevant. Yeah, like I said, it wasn't that clear.
Hopefully, it was just Phoney Bone.
That's what I hoped too.
Man it seems like I run out of chubbies awful quick these days.
A friend of mine lost his job and wife because of his terrible Hopeugrin addiction. He turns tricks now behind a Krispy Kreme downtown. It's an awful drug, and Onstad has no right to mock Hopeugrin dependency so carelessly.
I had a buddy that got cancer from reading. How dare Onstad include text in his strip. That gets me so steamed.
We ALL had a friend. Mine shot herself. It's still funny, you dreary, sanctimonious, attention-seeking ME-griever.
I'm still trying to find a funny way to spin Crohns/IBS but you're welcome to help.
"The Ladykillers" humorized IBS to a fair degree of success.
Indeed it did.
And thank you, I immediately thought of that movie when I saw the post, but could not remember the name for the life of me.
"The Ladykillers" did not do anything with any degree of success.
Fair enough, though I might argue that it successfully made The Big Lebowski look even better by comparison.
now the Big Lebowski is a film of unparalleled genius.
My criticism of "the Ladykillers" was from the position of a huge fan of the Coen brothers. I like almost all of their movies, Ladykillers and Intolerable Cruelty being the only real exceptions.
I agree. It's all a matter of relativity though. The Coen brothers' dried piss on a public toilet seat is Bill Fuckin' Faulkner compared to "_______* Movie"
*insert "Scary," "Date," "Epic," or any of that other excrement.
heartily seconded.
absolutely agree--those movies took the slow downward spiral of Mel Brooks' later movies, and strapped rocket boosters to them.
I have often wondered if I could ever write a film parody with the style and quality of 'Airplane' or 'Young Frankenstein'. But I think that the "___" movies, and the short attention spans of many folks today might make it impossible. (However, I am also exceedingly lazy with my writing, so claiming it would be a failure may just be a defense mechanism.)
I enjoyed the first Scary Movie to a degree but in my defense, I was 16. Beyond that.. I'm still waiting for "FUNNY Movie". At least Mel Brooks seemed to know his subject rather than just watching all the commercials, stealing the catchphrases and adding punchlines that hit like an amputee.
Well to be fair it was veeery successful at destroying a classic of cinema and making people wince when they hear the name "The Ladykillers" instead of saying "That is one of the all time classics of English cinema!"
Crohn's Disease is already funny because it, along with an unwarranted attack by Bonkers T McQuack, is the real reason that Pat is a vegulon.
My uncle suffocated on gas and drowned in the bath, one of my friends hanged himself and one of the nicest, most decent human beings I ever met died of a heroin overdose a month before he was to get married. It's a horrible world. Just staying topside and with most of your strange cares under control should get you some sort of medal.
"It's a horrible world. Just staying topside and with most of your strange cares under control should get you some sort of medal."
you just defined our era.
One young kiddie on Cake cried all the water out of his body. Just imagine how his mother felt. It's a fucking disgrace.
She got so mad that blood came out of her mouth and tear ducts! The doctors had to send her to be killed.
... Some got on the mayor, i hear.
One girl threw up her own pelvis bone before she snuffed her lid.
Then there was that guy who experience such severe time distortion from taking Cake that he got run over by a bus because he thought he had a month to cross the road.
i'm sorry but this is really funny to me.
...a month.
Was your friend hot? I mean, before she shot herself?
My great-uncle was killed by a transvestite hooker with a frying pan.
Everybody thinks I'm kidding.
Was he...was he visiting that sex-worker?
Was he/she, um, mixed race? Did your great uncle ask if she was?
He was in Vietnam, so i am assuming said hooker was Vietnamese, which might be racist? He [my great-uncle] paid in advance and then demanded his money back i think upon discovering the truth in the underwear. He [the hooker] then smacked him upside the head, which leads me to believe my uncle had threatened him. He was an alcoholic mofo and this would not surprise me.
You're working some rough chuckles these days.
Yeah, those Vietnamese hookers are crazy, especially the Saigon whore who bit my nose off.
Jump on this one, Lieutenant Pogo of the Obscure Comedy Reference Police.
Note to self: I have no idea what he is talking about.
It is the internet, few things are obscure anymore.
It's not that obscure for people whose basic cable included Comedy Central in the 90's.
You forget the international flavour of Acheworld
Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Satan?**
[Gary Coleman in "Dirty Work"]
Not funny, not cool, not a good post.
P.S. I'm on fuoxetine and it is excellent.
*fluoxetine dang I can't even spell my own meds. Wonder if that's a registered side effect.
[[The third comment is always the lame magnet. I wish I'd shut up already.]]
I want a drug called Hopeugrin, I think that's something we can all agree on.
Hells yes
I want a drug called Fuxufriday.
POETS
Please tell us that's a picture of you. Please. We're in a car a painful speculation going nowhere. Right boys?
She likes VNV Nation, which automatically makes her so awesome that she could look like you for all I care.
I like VNV nation.. Honest! Just ask Ben. He consistently bitches about it.
Now, give me huuuuuugs
The next time I see you I'm going to beat you with Icon Of Coil CDs, i swear.
God damnit.
Ah neat, you like ThouShaltNot. Alex Reed DJs at our local goth club, he's a cool guy.
If, going by the picture, she is actually Mystique/Raven Darkholme of X-men fame, then hell, she could look like anyone.
When discussing who was the hottest chick in the X-men series (we were teenagers), my friend made the following proclamation:
"Totally Mystique. I mean, she's a slut, and in bed she could look like anyone! 'Okay, now be a young Britney Spears....whoa! Okay, now be Rogue...yeah! Okay, now be Cyclops... dude! '"
Chauvinistic and juvenile, I know, but damn it was funny.
And who says she can't shift on attachments :o. *somewhere, millions of japanese people are aroused.*
I think that somewhere would be Japan.
I offer you stronger, manlier custom avaton -just for you!
Such shame is mine.
Thanks for that wonderful cartoon sex fantasy.
Whew, all this time I had no idea this speculation was going on. Yes, this is me. https://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y257/makesitbetter/vickink.jpg
You're pretty! But do you really want to have naked pictures of yourself on "teh intrarwebz"?
I see it was no cartoon fantasy. Fabulous! And very discrete at the same time.
I hope for your sake that alreadyinuse doesn't see this...
Way to give him a hint!
I don't know what kind of depression you've got, but I myself don't want to settle for anything else than Uwillgrin .
SMILEX!
I get a grin ag'nn!
Gleemonex makes it 72 degrees inside your head all the time.
Hey! I'm all hopped on Fluoxetine too!
Depression, connecting lonely internet folk for years and years.
Unless they're too depressed to connect.
I'm on bupropion and citalopram! Double whammy; take that, depression! I shoot my gun and depression's all "Is this fast enough?"
I'm on Prozac. Am I uncool because of this?
Fluoxetine = generic brand Prozac.
Man, you people are reminding me of one of too many conversations with crusty old Sergents and Warrant Officers with PTSD, comparing their daily cocktail of whatever keeps them from shoving their families into the back of their van.
I just took 6 codeine phosphate pills about an hour ago and man, are my armpits itchy.
You are so posh
Well, it's not like I had much say in the matter.
Don't you know that they proved that none of these anti-depressants have any perceptible effect? They're sugar pills that do nothing but dry out your mouth and kill your hard-on.
Real crippling depression is no joke. Most of us, however, have what i would describe as a pretty normal reaction to a crappy world that's simultaneously over-stimulating, boring, pointless, fast, catastrophic and uneventful. it's the Age of Kalyug; everything speeds up until we hit the apocalypse. The drugs are intended to keep us getting on that train in the morning and going to work. Not to make us happy. If everyone was happy and fulfilled, we'd all be revolutionaries.
Do you have any references for that statement?
https://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7263494.stm
The study caused a massive shit-storm when it came out. Like a 'uh-uh, I'm choosing not to believe the hard facts' response from everyone.
I remember, on this soap forum I read (yes it is a forum about soaps and various other bath sundries) for some reason, a lot of ladies that post there are into cats and their disorders. Someone posted that article, and within an hour it was eight pages of "WELL TELL THAT TO ME WHEN I'M HAPPY ON MEDICATION THEN"
I don't know what to believe in regards to the whole of mental health and medication thereof, but I do think people look for an easy way out of personality quirks sometimes. Asperger's syndrome, depression, borderline personality disorder, AD(H)D, while some cases are linked to actual chemical problems, most of them could be "cured" through basic therapy.
but yeah i have no proof or experience i'm just saying a lot of people e-diagnose themselves with Asperger's especially, because they're sort of nerdy. That's not a disorder, it's a personality type.
I see your BBC article and raise you a Slate article about how the placebo effect is probably mainly an urban legend.
Antidepressants drastically and positively changed my life. I do not think it was a placebo effect, since when I started taking them, I was a) very skeptical that they'd work, and b) terrified they'd flatten out all my personality quirks. But even it was a placebo effect, I'm cool with that. I would much rather be able to talk to people without having to, like, hide under a bed hyperventilating for several hours afterward than know that those pills weren't really effective and kill myself before I hit 30.
I'm fairly convinced that in the case of people who do have certain chemical imbalances, antidepressants do help, as in your case. The problem isn't with the drugs, but with the diagnostic process. There have been a few times in my life where I thought I was desperately in need of antidepressants for one reason or another, and went to a psychiatrist to talk about it. Every time this happened: The doctor asks me to basically tell him what I think is wrong and listens for maybe 5 or 10 minutes max, then gives me a one-page questionnaire with the most obvious leading questions ever, then looks at my answers and proclaims 'yep, you have it' and gives me a prescription along with a generous quantity of free samples and maybe a general recommendation for therapy. Basically the level of trust placed in the patient to self-diagnose is ridiculous, and it amounts to me coming in and saying "give me some Aderall, thanks."
Maybe therapy is more helpful, but from my somewhat extensive experience the problem is similar. Psychoanalysis is out of fashion and most therapists I've gone to were of the laid-back 'help you help yourself' approach. And each time I felt that they were unable to offer me anything that my own constant analyzing of myself hadn't already revealed, since the sessions mostly consisted of me telling them what I think is wrong and them nodding. What's the point of paying for that? What I needed was someone whose analytical skills surpassed my own and who could objectively analyze me and my behavior in a way that I couldn't, and who could take the lead and structure the questions in such a way that would conceal their intent and not allow me to self-sabotage the session by substituting my own analysis or what I think I should say in order to get the best results. But I never found that and in the meantime the drugs either didn't help or helped in ways that weren't immediately clear.
In conclusion, GODDAMMIT WHAT AM I GONNA DO ABOUT MY PROBLEMS?
Drugs won't cure what you have, but life might. I think you're too far into your own head and should do like volunteer work with mentally disabled children or cacner victims or something that activated your heart and brings you closer to your own humanity so you can forgive yourself for not being perfect and omniscient and able to bone anyone you want.
I went to a counsellor once, he basically helped me realize that life is shit and you die alone. Whatever right? I am never paying for any sort of therapy ever again, it is complete shit.
In my experience, drugs absolutely helped a friend who was depressed beyond the point of anyone being able to speak to him about it. He was also a very skeptical and very analytical person, who was unsure how they would affect the parts of his personality that didn't have anything to do with the depression.
The change was instantaneous, with his mood lightening, his attitude becoming more positive, he became more productive and fun to be around. (Unfortunately it didn't get rid of his ridiculous racist thoughts...Perhaps there is another pill for that? "Equalitol"? "MLK-Gandhis"? "WhiteMansGuiltrex"?)
Oh sweet fuck, I hate mother FUCKING folk psychology and medication debate. Why? Because I have AD(H)D. And more importantly, BECAUSE IT ALL COMES DOWN TO SEMANTICS.
Yes, it is just a personality type, I agree. But at what point is something considered a "mental illness"?
As Dr. Christopher Green once said, "It's only ever a problem, when it's a problem." I've primarily studied about AD(H)D, so that's what I'm going to be ranting about.
Now, of course AD(H)D is not a new thing - it's in every culture throughout history, with some arguably more than others. Yes, it certainly is a personality type - but the problem is, the majority of the rest of the damned world ain't got it, and have built society around people not built like me.
So, while it shouldn't be considered really a "disorder", as it's truly the way the good Lord made ye, fitting into the world is real hard. This has its pros and its cons - the pros are that you think outside of the box, see things differently, have a lot of energy, and are obsessive about the shit you like (of course, the symptoms of AD(H)D can be highly different depending on the individual, so it really really depends). Cons - actually getting stuff finished is like moving a fucking mountain, easily distracted (read: me, right now), miss important stuff, disorganised. Thus leading onto a lot of extreme failure or extreme success, thus leading easily onto other mental issues: heavy-ass depression, bi-polar tendancies, lack of a social network because nobody can keep up, whatever.
So while alot of the great movers and shakers of history have most likely had AD(H)D, 100-fold more AD(H)D-type people have crashed and burned, ended up in prison, done little with their lives, gone insane, whatever. But then again, a lot just figure it out eventually.
The main problem with misdiagnosis is because they need to re-define what is actually is : currently, for AD(H)D there's like 40-odd symptoms, and if you have around 15 of them, you've got it. So, my AD(H)D and someone else's might be completely different.
As for medication - everybody bitches and moans about it. Currently, I'm on Dexamphetamine after being on Ritalin until my late teens, and then years without anything - but lately, I just wasn't coping and was spiralling into a dark and nigh-suicidal depression as a result, and needed some help. It's not the be-all and end-all, not a wonder-drug, and it's not going to fix all my problems - that's for me to do, but it's just helping me. Eventually, the aim is to organise your brain enough to be able to handle your life without the meds. And God-willin' and the creek don't rise, I will.
All that I said could most likely be applied to the majority of mental issues you mentioned. Asperger's particularly, as it is also on the Autism spectrum, which AD(H)D arguably is - I can totally relate to Autistic people, as well as "normal" people. It's that detachment from reality and society, which I've got a little bit, probably more than other people, but thankfully only enough to be different while still being able to function in society. It's really only something that affects my own life, and not anybody else's (except my wife, who somehow thinks it's all cute, bless her).
And don't get me wrong - I'm glad I'm the way I am. I'm awesome. If I wasn't me, I'd wish I was.
It's just a bit difficult at times - same as for everybody, I know, we all got our shit, just mine can be a bit....amplified. I tend to live in extremes, with tendencies toward Bi-Polar without it being too much of an issue.
Bah, I bet none of that made sense - I'm in a rambling, stream-of-consciousness kind of mood. Hope you had fun with me.
*slow clap*
*the good kind of clap, not gonorrhea*
"slow gonorrhea"
V-chub and backslap.
vChub for "folk psychology" as opposed to "pop psychology."
Because "pop psychology" is when a bimbo starts talking about how she is a really spiritual person and she sluts around because she read the Kama Sutra and found it moving.
"Folk psychology" is listening to old Deafmute Tangerine Buchanan tune his gitbox and sing about the day they closed down the old mill.
I've never been diagnosed, but I think I've got AD(H)D. I can identify with all of what you've said, like for example this one time a while ago another friend and I were sleeping over at a friend's house, and when we lay down to get to sleep, they were listening to their Ipods, and they asked me how I got to sleep, since I don't have one. (It makes me sick that so many people have it because it's "cool", but that's a different story about my problems with society, including "Fuck....Hollister!") So I told them that I just think about stuff, and I gave them an example: Have you ever thought about how people believe they live in such a colorful world, when really there are only a finite amount of colors? You could argue that it's a continuum, and there are infinite colors between colors, but not all of the differnces are visible to the naked eye. When I told them that thought that I was mulling over, it went like: *awkward pause* "What?". Then the conversation turned to boys. (Once again, that's another story about my problems with society [mostly female adolescent society].)
But the point is that I get frustrated about how little deviation there is from the norm in my group of (non-internet) friends. They wear converses or vans, skinny jeans, straightened hair, and sometimes Hollister and Abercrombie. They have Ipods They have the same speech patterns (though that's not really so horrible, except for the fact that they talk about the same things: clothing (When I asked one of my friends why she said she didn't like my [flared] jeans, her response was that they're "totally gay"), the males of the species, television, and occasionally some politics or recently read books or random subjects to balance it out a bit). Then they think I'm saying I'm better and more unique than them when I relate this to them, and it bugs me that thinking how the system of society works is anything but perfect is seen as dissent against somthing that works for them. If it ain't broke, why fix it, right?
This really speaks to me.
So, I can identify. I can never get anything done either (for example: right now I am supposed to be translating a chapter in my Hebrew history workbook, but instead I am writing a mini-essay on Assetbar). Yeah, I get really into the things I like, and I get really frustrated with things I'm not as interested in.
Most of my friends think I'm mental, because I am either bursting with energy (being a class clown, jiggling my foot under the table, talking too fast and too loud, bursting randomly into song, generally being manic), or completely depressed about how the world works and how much it sucks usually. On those kinds of days, I just look forward to snuggling in my chair with a blanket and reading Achewood (and Assetbar). Keep on rockin' Assetpeople.
Anyhoo, I'm not really sure if I want to get diagnosed. I mean, I don't want to calm down when I'm in my energy-tastic moods, or water down my personality to make life easier for those who have to interact with me, but it would be nice to be able to concentrate on schoolwork. Should I? Advice please! I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO ABOUT MY PROBLEMS.
You know, I think it's best to stay off medication unless you are having debilitating problems. Honestly, I advocate having a couple beers and/or smoking a joint or two every once in a while. And I don't mean that in the sense of "Oh, I'm so fucked up I am not thinking about my problems." THAT leads to a hells of trouble. "Social medication," intoxicants that have been practiced since prehistory, for one allow easier socialization whereas most of the "soft" anti-depressants, etc. do not treat this. Secondly, responsible use does not alter your personality.
Anyway, that's what's helped me. I've never been a young woman, and honestly I have a hard time "fitting in" with anyone, so I wouldn't be surprised if this is totally off the wall to most people...
I've been trying that out lately and I think it's working. I keep overdoing it though; I've got pothead friends who don't go more than three days at a time without smoking, so I smoke more than I mean to. Usually I just write a shit ton of "Goals" down in a word file and fall asleep. How does your regimen work? while we're all being so personal.
Thank you sir.
I wish I could drop the Achewood irony-tone which permeates everything I put in this little box, but that's as close to serious as I can get in saying severe props, dude.
It made sense to me, we share a few attributes it seems. Good to see you don't blame anyone or anything and just try to get by. Inspiring sir.
Go fuck yourself you twat.
LOVE TWATS
LOVE THEM
Drown in boulders, Retard.
I dunno, they seem to improve and prolong my hardon....but maybe I'm an exception
I just realized that it is actually generic fluoxetine, everyone was just calling it Prozac.
I'm just got off Paxil and laughed as well.
Once again we see the cost of a first comment, however sincere. Shades, let this stand as a lesson. What that lesson teaches, we may never know.
"I hope the percoset thing is a joke"
Um... it's a web comic where the protaganists are stuffed and actual animals... isn't the entirety of Achewood a joke?
On a less douchey, over-sensitive note, the only thing that happened when I took Percocet was constipation.
Something that is being overlooked is that these are Beef's prescriptions... it's not like he is "abusing" drugs. It's on their registry in a psychiatric service ferchrissakes.
I was on percocet after having spinal surgery when i was twelve. I remember having all these WACKY
hallucinations but not being perturbed in the slightest. Like, "Mom, i think there's maggots in my bandages. We're not friends, though." This was after the took me off the morphine drip and before they resorted to Tylenol-3.
Same here, except it was when I broke my ankle. I had long, vivid dreams about running through a orange desert filled with discarded orange crab legs, or flying at a million miles an hour through a tunnel made of shimmery, sparkly Pyrex bakeware.
Hooray for Schedule II narcotics! Fucking you up legally since 1970.
After my surgery, the apocalypse happened but was confined to my mom's yard (seven acres, but still), and inside the fence the air was this bluey-grey colour [i like the way british words look, alright?] , as distinguished from the sky being blue. There was lightning just going back and forth between the tress because they were really clouds. Also, my dad's cat Simba just kept sitting on a fencepost asking us if we wanted sugar in our tea. I woke up and it didn't occur to me until i was off the percocet that it was all a dream
What a twist!
Chubbied for the M. Night Shyamalan ending
I always thought that was why people took percocet... So they don't shit themselves when they get drunk enough to lose bowel control.
I died from an overdose of Hopeugrin, but I'm not bitter.
How could you be bitter? As an old person, you might be tough and gamey, but not bitter.
You talkin' 'bout my bone, sonny?
I got no bone to pick with you. You being dead and all, I just wanted to talk about the flavor of your meat.
I got your meat right here.
Where? Like a barbeq- OHHHHHHHHHH! Like...Your penis?
You succeeded in making an old man blush. Thank you!
Everyone raise your hand if you want to see a blushing 59 year old penis
BOO TO THAT
DOUBLE NO!!
I DO
Apparently if a strip mentions anything that anybody has ever died from, then it's bad. Take note, Onstad!
My best friend died when she put her drum machine together incorrectly, and the crossed wired caused sparks that burnt her house down. But catgrl! Why did she not just use the manual!? you wail. Philippe was standing on it.
Fuckin' tight.
Where is the grave? Philippe is standing on it.
I agree. I've seen a friend get fat and stupid from being on them for less than 2 months.
Shades 'sup sorry 2 bother U but sum ppl said U hate Asians I hope that iz not Tru cause I got azn peeps
I hope you're the first to die from over-sensitivity.
Ok that's a bit mean. I take it back. I hope you get really sick from it, where you have to live with the sickness for the rest of your life.
That might be worse actually.
We gives a fuck yo
I mean, damn. It's "tradition" I guess for the first comment to be lame (and lamed), but this one really does it for me. Hella lames yo