senister
+1 -0
Ray's dad is the definition of style.
Ray's dad is the definition of style.
zebra
+0 -0
Beat you half to death over a misunderstanding involving the proper garnish for any particular kind of fish style.
It's a complicated and dangerous definition.
Beat you half to death over a misunderstanding involving the proper garnish for any particular kind of fish style.
It's a complicated and dangerous definition.
mysterymeat1001
+27 -0
When I picture Ray's dad, I can't help but think: what would Robert Duvall do?
When I picture Ray's dad, I can't help but think: what would Robert Duvall do?
j_smoothhands
+0 -0
I would give this 2 chubbies if i could.
Well said my friend.
I would give this 2 chubbies if i could.
Well said my friend.
smallblackdog
+0 -0
In a paralell universe he might have done [url=https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=robert duvall apocalypse now&search_type=&aq=0&oq=robert duvall]this[/url]
In a paralell universe he might have done [url=https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=robert duvall apocalypse now&search_type=&aq=0&oq=robert duvall]this[/url]
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
plus sign for the loss!!
plus sign for the loss!!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
ugggh what is it with me and this jazz.
ugggh what is it with me and this jazz.
boheeka
+0 -0
I don't know...
I feel like Duvall was causing trouble because he could, whereas Ramses causes trouble because he has to.
I don't know...
I feel like Duvall was causing trouble because he could, whereas Ramses causes trouble because he has to.
hassanoleary
+51 -0
We all knew that Beef's wedding would be an arc like no other, but with this it has become officially epic.
We all knew that Beef's wedding would be an arc like no other, but with this it has become officially epic.
senister
+2 -0
agreed. have a chubby.
agreed. have a chubby.
xi
+0 -0
Epic is such the right word for what it is.
Epic is such the right word for what it is.
j_smoothhands
+1 -0
Anything involving Ray's pop is epic by default.
Anything involving Ray's pop is epic by default.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
It's legendary at best. It'll become epic when the Tenmen play the reception.
Ah, screw the reception. I see them playing at the ceremony.
It's legendary at best. It'll become epic when the Tenmen play the reception.
Ah, screw the reception. I see them playing at the ceremony.
pogo
+0 -0
I've got a song suggestion, Wilco's "On and On."
You youngsters will know how to go find it online, I suppose.
I've got a song suggestion, Wilco's "On and On."
You youngsters will know how to go find it online, I suppose.
girlandagun
+0 -0
Yeah, but when I think of Achewood, I think of "epic," when I think of "legendary," I just think of How I Met Your Mother.
Yeah, but when I think of Achewood, I think of "epic," when I think of "legendary," I just think of How I Met Your Mother.
hedonismbot
+0 -1
The distinction is very easy. Epic is purple, legendary is orange. If you get that, my God, you are so absolutely lame...
The distinction is very easy. Epic is purple, legendary is orange. If you get that, my God, you are so absolutely lame...
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
WoW is the cancer eating society.
WoW is the cancer eating society.
lux
+0 -0
ding! nom nom
ding! nom nom
hedonismbot
+0 -0
NERDS! LET'S STOMP 'EM!
NERDS! LET'S STOMP 'EM!
spinynorman
+1 -0
Whenever Ramses makes an appearance I hear the opening chords to The Proposition in my head.
Whenever Ramses makes an appearance I hear the opening chords to The Proposition in my head.
westsider8
+0 -0
But I thought Ramses is better known for his leavery than for his entrances.
But I thought Ramses is better known for his leavery than for his entrances.
spinynorman
+0 -0
Eh, the chords really work for either, I guess.
Eh, the chords really work for either, I guess.
dr_strangeglove
+4 -0
You just use those chords any old way you want dear and the good lord God will provide.
You just use those chords any old way you want dear and the good lord God will provide.
gmm
+0 -0
Yeah, this is one of the greatest "Aaaaw sheeiiiiiiit!" moments in all of Achewood right here.
Yeah, this is one of the greatest "Aaaaw sheeiiiiiiit!" moments in all of Achewood right here.
snidedk
+17 -0
I feel that the Showbiz problem is best solved through application of Ramses Luther Smuckles. One toe out of line and Showbiz will suffer from a severe case of Tequiza bottle through the brainpan.
I feel that the Showbiz problem is best solved through application of Ramses Luther Smuckles. One toe out of line and Showbiz will suffer from a severe case of Tequiza bottle through the brainpan.
earendil
+10 -0
I think Ramses is kind of like a universal solvent. Apply liberally to any problem, and it will soon cease to trouble you.
I think Ramses is kind of like a universal solvent. Apply liberally to any problem, and it will soon cease to trouble you.
c_dizzle
+0 -0
Solvent in quantities exceeding 4 liters come in a Sure-Seal (C) can of whoop-ass.
Solvent in quantities exceeding 4 liters come in a Sure-Seal (C) can of whoop-ass.
kickstart
+9 -0
HEAD-PUNCH: apply directly to SHOWBIZ
HEAD-PUNCH: apply directly to SHOWBIZ
raysdangnachos
+2 -0
...no one said it could be done...
...no one said it could be done...
hamscout
+5 -0
Ramses may soon make Showbiz regret that he is "not religious. not religious at all ."
Ramses may soon make Showbiz regret that he is "not religious. not religious at all ."
hardelicious
+50 -0
"Listen here, Ponytail. You will go to heaven.
Because the hell is about to get beat out of you ."
"Listen here, Ponytail. You will go to heaven.
Because the hell is about to get beat out of you ."
krispykorn
+0 -0
I love you, hardelicious.
I love you, hardelicious.
autrepoupee
+3 -0
Ray's pop is the coolest cat in town, now that he is in town and all.
Ray's pop is the coolest cat in town, now that he is in town and all.
doomchild
+1 -0
Does that mean he was the coolest cat out of town a few hours ago?
Also, I'm not sure "cool" is the right word to describe a man who beats down an entire basketball team. I'm fairly certain the more accurate adjectives are "raw" and "rude".
DC
Does that mean he was the coolest cat out of town a few hours ago?
Also, I'm not sure "cool" is the right word to describe a man who beats down an entire basketball team. I'm fairly certain the more accurate adjectives are "raw" and "rude".
DC
i_love_kate
+0 -0
I don't care what'chu say the man's cool.
I don't care what'chu say the man's cool.
wilto
+6 -0
Cool and rude.
This is to be in no way confused with Raphael, who, historically, was cool but rude.
Cool and rude.
This is to be in no way confused with Raphael, who, historically, was cool but rude.
kickstart
+7 -0
Gimme a break
Gimme a break
professorhazard
+7 -0
Michaelangelo is a party dude.
Michaelangelo is a party dude.
awko
+0 -0
You three would have been chubbied so hard if I had any chubbies left.
You three would have been chubbied so hard if I had any chubbies left.
hbaranov
+0 -0
I achieved the chubby trifecta! Do I get a prize?
I achieved the chubby trifecta! Do I get a prize?
loneal
+0 -1
Oh I am SO glad I had a chubby left.
Oh I am SO glad I had a chubby left.
farqussus
+0 -0
I only had but one chubby to give.
I only had but one chubby to give.
woodenteeth
+1 -0
Ray's Dad has some serious respect for Roast Beef.
Ray's Dad has some serious respect for Roast Beef.
whiteturtle
+13 -1
He knows that Roast Beef has been the heart and soul to his boy, a heart and soul that he could never and would never want to be. A father is not a friend a father should, at best, suceed in showing his son exactly how much life is going to beat the shit out of him.
He knows that Roast Beef has been the heart and soul to his boy, a heart and soul that he could never and would never want to be. A father is not a friend a father should, at best, suceed in showing his son exactly how much life is going to beat the shit out of him.
hassanoleary
+5 -1
I agree, but had Roast Beef not been co-champion of the GOF but simply Ray's knucklehead since small times, I doubt Ramses would make an appearance.
I agree, but had Roast Beef not been co-champion of the GOF but simply Ray's knucklehead since small times, I doubt Ramses would make an appearance.
whiteturtle
+4 -0
that is a good point, if not for the GOF, he would just mail him a bottle of jack daniels and a polished and ready colt .45 that was used by a confederate soldier in the civil war. There would be no note.
that is a good point, if not for the GOF, he would just mail him a bottle of jack daniels and a polished and ready colt .45 that was used by a confederate soldier in the civil war. There would be no note.
octafish
+1 -1
Because Ramses is a Democrat?
Confederates = Democrats
The Union = Republicans
Oh how things have changed.
Because Ramses is a Democrat?
Confederates = Democrats
The Union = Republicans
Oh how things have changed.
chuvak
+0 -0
A comment left by chuvak was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, ppccd, thumbfinger, Absurdist, littlefatdog)
A comment left by chuvak was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, ppccd, thumbfinger, Absurdist, littlefatdog)
tekende
+4 -1
chuvak: No. You are incorrect. The Democrats did not "champion racial equality" until the late 1960s--in fact, the Civil Rights Act was passed by a majority of Republicans, while a small majority of Democrats actually voted against it.
But really, today's Republican and Democrat parties are absolutely nothing like they were back in the 1800s, or even the mid-1900s. The two parties have only had their current identities for about forty years, and they're still changing all the time.
chuvak: No. You are incorrect. The Democrats did not "champion racial equality" until the late 1960s--in fact, the Civil Rights Act was passed by a majority of Republicans, while a small majority of Democrats actually voted against it.
But really, today's Republican and Democrat parties are absolutely nothing like they were back in the 1800s, or even the mid-1900s. The two parties have only had their current identities for about forty years, and they're still changing all the time.
kendieatsbabies
+0 -0
The small number of Democrats that you speak of were the Southern Democrats -- the ones who changed parties because of the Civil Rights movement. Before this, neither party was really "championing" anything of the sort. So, both your points kinda feed into each other, and no one is actually incorrect.
The small number of Democrats that you speak of were the Southern Democrats -- the ones who changed parties because of the Civil Rights movement. Before this, neither party was really "championing" anything of the sort. So, both your points kinda feed into each other, and no one is actually incorrect.
chachibenji
+0 -0
Dixiecrats screw up everything, then and now.
"The HELL that black man is goanna be my president."
Dixiecrats screw up everything, then and now.
"The HELL that black man is goanna be my president."
hardelicious
+2 -1
incidentally, the recent presidential bid by Bob Barr of GA (libertarian) may pull votes from McCain. Add to that the very large black population in Atlanta, Columbus, Savannah, and their respective sprawling areas, and what you have is the distinct possibility of...
sit down for this...
Georgia going to Obama. A blue state in the heart of Dixie. I'd be so proud to be a Georgian.
incidentally, the recent presidential bid by Bob Barr of GA (libertarian) may pull votes from McCain. Add to that the very large black population in Atlanta, Columbus, Savannah, and their respective sprawling areas, and what you have is the distinct possibility of...
sit down for this...
Georgia going to Obama. A blue state in the heart of Dixie. I'd be so proud to be a Georgian.
chachibenji
+0 -0
Oh yeah Georgia is almost definitely going to Obama just from the demographics alone, aside from the foot shovage which grampy is going to begin doing *hopefully* soon. I want moar entertainment in mah election.
Oh yeah Georgia is almost definitely going to Obama just from the demographics alone, aside from the foot shovage which grampy is going to begin doing *hopefully* soon. I want moar entertainment in mah election.
loneal
+0 -0
If Bob Barr doesn't win the presidency, at least he has the comfort of knowing he's an Oscar-worthy actor .
If Bob Barr doesn't win the presidency, at least he has the comfort of knowing he's an Oscar-worthy actor .
kendieatsbabies
+0 -0
It wouldn't be so surprising; Georgia (and Louisiana, whose ex-residents will pump up the Georgia Dem votes) went blue for Clinton in '92.
It wouldn't be so surprising; Georgia (and Louisiana, whose ex-residents will pump up the Georgia Dem votes) went blue for Clinton in '92.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Georgia... going blue, since 92
Georgia... going blue, since 92
chuvak
+0 -0
Well thank God.
Well thank God.
doomchild
+2 -0
A quick note: clarifying the American political climate so close to an apparent entrance of The Man with the Blood on His Hands feels kind of weird. I mean, your post was spot on, but I was still thinking about a beer bottle cleanly aerating Carl Veidt's head when an image of the National Mall, packed end to end with people clamoring for change marched in and started making demands. The end result was a brief montage of fairly violent images involving the many ways Al Sharpton would have his ass handed to him by the rawest cat to sport Versace sunglasses.
It was more than a little jarring.
DC
P.S. Who decided that post boxes should be three fucking lines high?
A quick note: clarifying the American political climate so close to an apparent entrance of The Man with the Blood on His Hands feels kind of weird. I mean, your post was spot on, but I was still thinking about a beer bottle cleanly aerating Carl Veidt's head when an image of the National Mall, packed end to end with people clamoring for change marched in and started making demands. The end result was a brief montage of fairly violent images involving the many ways Al Sharpton would have his ass handed to him by the rawest cat to sport Versace sunglasses.
It was more than a little jarring.
DC
P.S. Who decided that post boxes should be three fucking lines high?
pogo
+0 -0
"P.S. Who decided that post boxes should be three fucking lines high?"
Our Creator gave us this format. We do not question it.
"P.S. Who decided that post boxes should be three fucking lines high?"
Our Creator gave us this format. We do not question it.
doomchild
+0 -0
My mistake.
DC
My mistake.
DC
pogo
+0 -0
I agree, however, that it is annoying to waste so much space, but you'll get used to it.
I agree, however, that it is annoying to waste so much space, but you'll get used to it.
chuvak
+0 -0
the last 40 years was what i was talking about.
the last 40 years was what i was talking about.
chuvak
+0 -0
Also wasn't the act actually proposed by JFK - a democrat, and shoved through by LBJ? Anyway, this is not the forum, you frustrated history teacher you.
Also wasn't the act actually proposed by JFK - a democrat, and shoved through by LBJ? Anyway, this is not the forum, you frustrated history teacher you.
whiteturtle
+13 -0
wuh guh? It was a little more complicated than that, methinks. "Conservatives" and "Progressives" have just swapped names back and forth over the years, do to complex demographic and social shifts. I just thought it would be a classy, manly gift for Ramses to give to Roast Beef in a hypothetical story situation.
OH JESUS GOD I WROTE FAN FICTION
wuh guh? It was a little more complicated than that, methinks. "Conservatives" and "Progressives" have just swapped names back and forth over the years, do to complex demographic and social shifts. I just thought it would be a classy, manly gift for Ramses to give to Roast Beef in a hypothetical story situation.
OH JESUS GOD I WROTE FAN FICTION
usversusthem
+1 -0
you go sit in the corner and think about what you've done, whiteturtle.
you go sit in the corner and think about what you've done, whiteturtle.
lrosetw8
+4 -0
This is why we can never have company over, whiteturtle.
This is why we can never have company over, whiteturtle.
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
Sorry you wrote fan fiction dude, here is my gun if you want to erase yourself from existence.
Sorry you wrote fan fiction dude, here is my gun if you want to erase yourself from existence.
a_horde_of_orcs
+3 -1
That is a very shallow and ultimately inaccurate assessment of the state of American electoral politics from the pre-Civil War period to the present. Even the Republican party of old was an uneasy coalition of anti-slavery Whigs, scary northern industrial/ financial interests and various war profiteers whose alliance with the abolitionist cause was opportunistic. IMHO these 'conservative' interests have been in undisputed control of the party since William McKinley won the nomination.
And the Democratic Party has had a liberal-populist streak long before Lyndon Johnson finally and completely alienated it's southern cracker constituency. Thus it cannot be said that there is a 'liberal' and a 'conservative' faction' that simply switch names over the years.
That is a very shallow and ultimately inaccurate assessment of the state of American electoral politics from the pre-Civil War period to the present. Even the Republican party of old was an uneasy coalition of anti-slavery Whigs, scary northern industrial/ financial interests and various war profiteers whose alliance with the abolitionist cause was opportunistic. IMHO these 'conservative' interests have been in undisputed control of the party since William McKinley won the nomination.
And the Democratic Party has had a liberal-populist streak long before Lyndon Johnson finally and completely alienated it's southern cracker constituency. Thus it cannot be said that there is a 'liberal' and a 'conservative' faction' that simply switch names over the years.
whiteturtle
+3 -0
Did you see the part where I mentioned complex social and demographic shifts? I said that because I didn't want to say all that shit you just said.
Did you see the part where I mentioned complex social and demographic shifts? I said that because I didn't want to say all that shit you just said.
tipist
+4 -0
BECAUSE YOU WERE BUSY WRITING FAN FICTION, AMIRITE???
BECAUSE YOU WERE BUSY WRITING FAN FICTION, AMIRITE???
hbaranov
+0 -0
Yes, but your avatar makes me sad
Yes, but your avatar makes me sad
pogo
+0 -0
Re: Lyndon Johnson days. Remember the term "Dixiecrats"?
Re: Lyndon Johnson days. Remember the term "Dixiecrats"?
_
+0 -0
I lost a lot of memory recall due to Nam.
whiteturtle: complex and complicated are not interchangable terms. not that I'm trying to be a dick. I'm just sayin.
I lost a lot of memory recall due to Nam.
whiteturtle: complex and complicated are not interchangable terms. not that I'm trying to be a dick. I'm just sayin.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Ah the Dixiecrats, they had that George Wallace character didn't they? I wrote a paper on them earlier this year and was disgusted to find myself chortling at Wallace's many witticisms.
He was one witty racist son of a bitch.
Ah the Dixiecrats, they had that George Wallace character didn't they? I wrote a paper on them earlier this year and was disgusted to find myself chortling at Wallace's many witticisms.
He was one witty racist son of a bitch.
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, falseprophet, loneal, asobi, tellumo)
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, falseprophet, loneal, asobi, tellumo)
spinynorman
+0 -0
Why not mix it up? Why not make it a watermelon, or something similarly horrible?
Why not mix it up? Why not make it a watermelon, or something similarly horrible?
gladi8orrex
+0 -1
pocobor morf eb ton dluow ti neht
spinynorman
+0 -0
Everything has to be from... um... Pocobor?
...
(By the way, does anyone else think that would make a great name for an Interior Mexican restaurant?)
Everything has to be from... um... Pocobor?
...
(By the way, does anyone else think that would make a great name for an Interior Mexican restaurant?)
gladi8orrex
+1 -1
u goof, lol
u goof, lol
kamet
+0 -0
It depends entirely on pronunciation.
It depends entirely on pronunciation.
falseprophet
+0 -1
What the fuck is 'bassball' supposed to be anyway? Are you trying to say baseball or basketball, or some retarded portmanteau of the two?
That movie was an abortion. AN ABORTION, DO YOU HEAR?!
What the fuck is 'bassball' supposed to be anyway? Are you trying to say baseball or basketball, or some retarded portmanteau of the two?
That movie was an abortion. AN ABORTION, DO YOU HEAR?!
octafish
+0 -0
Heh, I was going to slam you for slamming ROBOCOP and realised that you were slamming a much more slammable film instead. Go in peace.
Heh, I was going to slam you for slamming ROBOCOP and realised that you were slamming a much more slammable film instead. Go in peace.
thorfinn
+1 -0
You are an abortion, falseprophet. AN ABORTION, DO YOU HEAR?!
Baseketball was a fine, fine film, and I won't stand idly by and watch you slander such greatness.
You are an abortion, falseprophet. AN ABORTION, DO YOU HEAR?!
Baseketball was a fine, fine film, and I won't stand idly by and watch you slander such greatness.
professorhazard
+1 -0
Oh! What an unfortunate conversation to be having on Dozen Egg Night.
Oh! What an unfortunate conversation to be having on Dozen Egg Night.
thorfinn
+0 -0
What could possibly go wrong on free sock and orange night?
What could possibly go wrong on free sock and orange night?
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I tried to argue the quality of the film a while back, but it was goat-semen-in-a-thin-balloon night, and well, we all got a little egg on our faces.
I tried to argue the quality of the film a while back, but it was goat-semen-in-a-thin-balloon night, and well, we all got a little egg on our faces.
wilto
+0 -0
Yeah, but it was certainly no Biodome.
Yeah, but it was certainly no Biodome.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Of course! It's all so simple now!
Of course! It's all so simple now!
porquechutzpah
+5 -0
every year when my family goes to montgomery, al we have to listen to the same fight that my stepfather, his mom, and his siblings have had since 1968(?) "well ronnie, i just dont understand why you hadda go-on throw way your football scholarship. i mean, you couldda gon to Auburn, and not had to go to ve-et-naam if you'd just helped mr. wallace."
ronnie always reponds with "i went to thailand. i drank coca cola out of plastic bags and mopped an evac hospital for two years. and i told you now like i told you then. no segregationist sumbitch is getting my support.i dont care about an f in shop class if it's doin the right thing." then it goes in to a two day discussion of the right thing versus the right thing, and why he couldnt find a nice girl in alabama to marry off with, somthing about his brother's wife being from the good korea, and that there isnt a good cuba.....
this is why we live eighteen hours away.
every year when my family goes to montgomery, al we have to listen to the same fight that my stepfather, his mom, and his siblings have had since 1968(?) "well ronnie, i just dont understand why you hadda go-on throw way your football scholarship. i mean, you couldda gon to Auburn, and not had to go to ve-et-naam if you'd just helped mr. wallace."
ronnie always reponds with "i went to thailand. i drank coca cola out of plastic bags and mopped an evac hospital for two years. and i told you now like i told you then. no segregationist sumbitch is getting my support.i dont care about an f in shop class if it's doin the right thing." then it goes in to a two day discussion of the right thing versus the right thing, and why he couldnt find a nice girl in alabama to marry off with, somthing about his brother's wife being from the good korea, and that there isnt a good cuba.....
this is why we live eighteen hours away.
chachibenji
+0 -0
Gah I thought I would be the first to be all polyhistorical all using that term and I didnt scroll down far enough to see that POGO RUINED MY DAY AGAIN :(
Just kidding.
Gah I thought I would be the first to be all polyhistorical all using that term and I didnt scroll down far enough to see that POGO RUINED MY DAY AGAIN :(
Just kidding.
pogo
+0 -0
Imagine how I feel, seeing YOUR Dixiecrat reference coming before mine!
Imagine how I feel, seeing YOUR Dixiecrat reference coming before mine!
chachibenji
+0 -0
Im sorry sir I am just a young whipper snapperlet political science major with a minor in american history shucks I aint got no room to even speak
Im sorry sir I am just a young whipper snapperlet political science major with a minor in american history shucks I aint got no room to even speak
pogo
+0 -0
Ah hell, protocol be damned. We need the viewpoints of our younger members of this august body, so feel free to speak up, even if I've got the floor. Why are we in a pretend Frank Cpara movie about Congress all of a sudden?
Ah hell, protocol be damned. We need the viewpoints of our younger members of this august body, so feel free to speak up, even if I've got the floor. Why are we in a pretend Frank Cpara movie about Congress all of a sudden?
terrainasaur
+0 -0
you have been chubbied sir, because knowing is half the battle.
education .
you have been chubbied sir, because knowing is half the battle.
education .
fallow_fields
+2 -0
Dogg I'm sorry that you wrote fan fiction
(inside) I'm so so sorry
Dogg I'm sorry that you wrote fan fiction
(inside) I'm so so sorry
squares
+1 -0
You made your bed. Now severely beat your friends in it!
You made your bed. Now severely beat your friends in it!
the_voice
+1 -0
Ok, but Ray's Dad will care about Roast Beef in a way that will never matter.
Ok, but Ray's Dad will care about Roast Beef in a way that will never matter.
doomchild
+0 -0
Ramses Luther doesn't care . He respects just enough not to destroy.
DC
Ramses Luther doesn't care . He respects just enough not to destroy.
DC
jonno
+0 -0
This man seems to have signed his comment.
How redundant.
This man seems to have signed his comment.
How redundant.
professorhazard
+0 -0
I thought it was an emoticon I didn't understand!
I thought it was an emoticon I didn't understand!
howl
+1 -0
It seems strange that he would sign his posts, but not bother to change to a distinctive imagitaricon.
It seems strange that he would sign his posts, but not bother to change to a distinctive imagitaricon.
jonno
+0 -0
This needs sorting. It is important to be a recognizable fellow on assetbar.
This needs sorting. It is important to be a recognizable fellow on assetbar.
doomchild
+0 -0
I really don't see what the big deal is. I sign letters and emails, so why not posts? As I've said, my name may be on the envelope or in the "From:" field, but it's also on the message . Besides, muscle memory is completely a thing.
DC
I really don't see what the big deal is. I sign letters and emails, so why not posts? As I've said, my name may be on the envelope or in the "From:" field, but it's also on the message . Besides, muscle memory is completely a thing.
DC
jonno
+0 -0
That is true. Your logic and italics have won me over.
Anyway, redundancy is cool, you can never have enough redundancy.
That is true. Your logic and italics have won me over.
Anyway, redundancy is cool, you can never have enough redundancy.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Yes, listen to the 13-year-old talking steam-powered watch-thing-head-hat
Yes, listen to the 13-year-old talking steam-powered watch-thing-head-hat
pogo
+0 -0
That's easy for you to say.
That's easy for you to say.
pogo
+0 -0
Points for "imagitaricon"!
Points for "imagitaricon"!
delzhand
+1 -0
Don't rap mush with me.
Don't rap mush with me.
clapyourhands
+0 -0
Ramses believes that if the number of people you discipline with your fists each day is less than your age, you've gone soft and are probably a commie sympathiser.
Ramses believes that if the number of people you discipline with your fists each day is less than your age, you've gone soft and are probably a commie sympathiser.
morypcaina
+1 -0
Your politics don't matter. It means you're a sympathizer . Probably a sympathiser too.
Your politics don't matter. It means you're a sympathizer . Probably a sympathiser too.
comrade_tom
+1 -0
Hell i think Ramses would admire the communists, they kicked some serious ass when they put their minds to it.
even though i can imagine Nixon or such using Ramses in cold war black ops operations with names like "operation Lee Marvin" or "operation Lee Van Cleef"
Hell i think Ramses would admire the communists, they kicked some serious ass when they put their minds to it.
even though i can imagine Nixon or such using Ramses in cold war black ops operations with names like "operation Lee Marvin" or "operation Lee Van Cleef"
whiteturtle
+1 -0
I appreciate any comment that involves Lee Van Cleef. Clearly, the man with the worst ass.
[IMGS OFF]
I appreciate any comment that involves Lee Van Cleef. Clearly, the man with the worst ass.
[IMGS OFF]
octafish
+3 -0
Snake Plissken? I heard you were dead.
[IMGS OFF]
Snake Plissken? I heard you were dead.
[IMGS OFF]
kamet
+0 -0
You can't kill Snake Plissken. Silly Octafish.
You can't kill Snake Plissken. Silly Octafish.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
Don't forget my youthful introduction to Lee, "The Master" (aka "Master Ninja")
[IMGS OFF]
Don't forget my youthful introduction to Lee, "The Master" (aka "Master Ninja")
[IMGS OFF]
kamet
+2 -0
Scrolling by fast.. that guy looked like Larry David.
Scrolling by fast.. that guy looked like Larry David.
pogo
+0 -0
As if Larry David even has a sword!
As if Larry David even has a sword!
comrade_tom
+0 -0
"Now Get your Smuck Fuck of a fuckin' manager out of my sight before he draws his fuckin' katana in front of my Sammy! Get him the fuck out of here i say!"
bom, bom, bom.....
"Now Get your Smuck Fuck of a fuckin' manager out of my sight before he draws his fuckin' katana in front of my Sammy! Get him the fuck out of here i say!"
bom, bom, bom.....
whiteturtle
+0 -0
despite the cut off nature of this picture, when you scroll over it looks like he is drawing his blade.
You should have paid him the money!
despite the cut off nature of this picture, when you scroll over it looks like he is drawing his blade.
You should have paid him the money!
octafish
+0 -0
The pity is, when he is paid, he always follows his job through. You know that.
The pity is, when he is paid, he always follows his job through. You know that.
scorpio_nadir
+0 -0
Who says a leevancleef's ass is bad?
Who says a leevancleef's ass is bad?
senister
+1 -0
Ramses Luther Smuckles does not accept that expensive kitchen appliances do not come with all available attachments.
Ramses Luther Smuckles does not accept that expensive kitchen appliances do not come with all available attachments.
chuvak
+0 -0
He's damn right too. Damn right.
He's damn right too. Damn right.
anabanananana
+0 -0
He is right. I have that mixer, and it definitely came with the dough hook attachment.
He is right. I have that mixer, and it definitely came with the dough hook attachment.
earendil
+0 -1
OH SNAP!
OH SNAP!
mrfedora
+0 -0
That is what you get for poking fun at a man's hat.
HAT POWER!
That is what you get for poking fun at a man's hat.
HAT POWER!
earendil
+0 -0
MrFedora, is your avatar or is it not a penis.
This has been bugging me.
MrFedora, is your avatar or is it not a penis.
This has been bugging me.
mrfedora
+0 -0
It is a picture of Baron von Beesworth, the beemancer, in his grief as one of his precious bees is murdered. Here it is, full sized.
[IMGS OFF]
Please also note his stylish and fuctional flaming beehive hat. It is the height of beemancing fashion.
It is a picture of Baron von Beesworth, the beemancer, in his grief as one of his precious bees is murdered. Here it is, full sized.
[IMGS OFF]
Please also note his stylish and fuctional flaming beehive hat. It is the height of beemancing fashion.
mrfedora
+3 -0
let me try posting that image again.
[IMGS OFF]
let me try posting that image again.
[IMGS OFF]
pogo
+2 -0
Close-up, it still looks like a dick.
Close-up, it still looks like a dick.
kamet
+0 -0
All squirting stuff from the top of his "hat"
All squirting stuff from the top of his "hat"
foea
+0 -0
You really need to have a doctor look at that.
You really need to have a doctor look at that.
earendil
+0 -1
I'm not too sure about this bowling thing though. It seems to me that the non-achewood character most likely to get a strike bowling a camera is Fred Flintstone. I don't like to think of Ramses Luther Smuckles doing something that Fred Flintstone would do.
I'm not too sure about this bowling thing though. It seems to me that the non-achewood character most likely to get a strike bowling a camera is Fred Flintstone. I don't like to think of Ramses Luther Smuckles doing something that Fred Flintstone would do.
senister
+0 -0
Considering that Ramses Luther Smuckles only exists in Achewood I don't see how he can be referred to as a non-achewood character.
He bowled as strike with a camera because he is extremely badass.
Considering that Ramses Luther Smuckles only exists in Achewood I don't see how he can be referred to as a non-achewood character.
He bowled as strike with a camera because he is extremely badass.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I think earendil was talking about Fred Flinstone being an outsider, not Ramses. He was making a link between them however. You've misread the comment perhaps.
I think earendil was talking about Fred Flinstone being an outsider, not Ramses. He was making a link between them however. You've misread the comment perhaps.
senister
+1 -0
ahhhhhhhh........
see what severe sleep deprivation does to you?
ahhhhhhhh........
see what severe sleep deprivation does to you?
featurelessvoid
+10 -0
I think there's another reason why he bowled a strike with the camera. In so doing, he broke the pattern of "damage people when disappointed" by substituting "damage consumer goods when disappointed." That's important because it allows an interpretation of the last panel that world fortify his reputation (he's about to smash the KitchenAid into countless tiny shards of plastic and shame) rather than tainting his legend (he's about to hit the Crate and Barrel lady).
In any case, I like to think that he bowled the strike by casually tossing the camera backward over his shoulder as he walked out the door, never even pausing to look back at the pins. That's the way of the badass.
I think there's another reason why he bowled a strike with the camera. In so doing, he broke the pattern of "damage people when disappointed" by substituting "damage consumer goods when disappointed." That's important because it allows an interpretation of the last panel that world fortify his reputation (he's about to smash the KitchenAid into countless tiny shards of plastic and shame) rather than tainting his legend (he's about to hit the Crate and Barrel lady).
In any case, I like to think that he bowled the strike by casually tossing the camera backward over his shoulder as he walked out the door, never even pausing to look back at the pins. That's the way of the badass.
earendil
+0 -0
Yes. You have allayed my anxieties, futurelessvoid. Thank you for making it so that I never have to think of Fred Flintstone and Ramses Smuckles in the same breath ever again.
Yes. You have allayed my anxieties, futurelessvoid. Thank you for making it so that I never have to think of Fred Flintstone and Ramses Smuckles in the same breath ever again.
loneal
+0 -1
You have taken away featurelessvoid's future.
You have taken away featurelessvoid's future.
earendil
+0 -0
bwa-ha-ha?
bwa-ha-ha?
pravda
+1 -0
Yes, but instead of twinkling his toes ala Fred Flinstone he would punch the ground repeatedly and then throw the ball down the lane. I don't know how he would manage to pummel the earth while bowling a strike at the same time but that is how I like to imagine it happening anyways. The floor would then say it was very sorry and would begin waxing itself immediately.
Yes, but instead of twinkling his toes ala Fred Flinstone he would punch the ground repeatedly and then throw the ball down the lane. I don't know how he would manage to pummel the earth while bowling a strike at the same time but that is how I like to imagine it happening anyways. The floor would then say it was very sorry and would begin waxing itself immediately.
fireking
+4 -0
Well, see, Flintstone would un-gentlemanly throw the camera at the pins. Ramses Luther Smuckles would have "bowled" the camera by sending it right down the gutter where it belongs, and the ten pins would have done the gentlemanly thing and fallen as a show of respect.
Well, see, Flintstone would un-gentlemanly throw the camera at the pins. Ramses Luther Smuckles would have "bowled" the camera by sending it right down the gutter where it belongs, and the ten pins would have done the gentlemanly thing and fallen as a show of respect.
pyromancer
+0 -0
It might be pertinent that rather than bowling the camera, he "bowled" the camera.
It might be pertinent that rather than bowling the camera, he "bowled" the camera.
invidious
+4 -0
Please realize that this whole "bowl the camera" thing was just Ramses gettin' justifiably pissed at the slight put upon him by the bowling alley staff.
You see, for the average person, bowling a perfect, 300 game is a major accomplishment. Such an accomplishment is usually honored with polaroid pictures, plaques, and cheesy mafioso/graduation-style rings purchased out of a catalog.
For a man as raw as Ramses Luther Smuckles, however, bowling a perfect game is about as difficult as putting on a pair of pants. Insulted that the other people in the alley would think that a task SO EASY would be an accomplishment for HIM, he disdainfully threw the camera at the pins. Of course they all went down. It was Ramses' way of saying, "Boys, your game here ain't worth shit; I just came in here because I was thirsty and am doing this to pass the time while knockin' back some cold ones."
Please realize that this whole "bowl the camera" thing was just Ramses gettin' justifiably pissed at the slight put upon him by the bowling alley staff.
You see, for the average person, bowling a perfect, 300 game is a major accomplishment. Such an accomplishment is usually honored with polaroid pictures, plaques, and cheesy mafioso/graduation-style rings purchased out of a catalog.
For a man as raw as Ramses Luther Smuckles, however, bowling a perfect game is about as difficult as putting on a pair of pants. Insulted that the other people in the alley would think that a task SO EASY would be an accomplishment for HIM, he disdainfully threw the camera at the pins. Of course they all went down. It was Ramses' way of saying, "Boys, your game here ain't worth shit; I just came in here because I was thirsty and am doing this to pass the time while knockin' back some cold ones."
ssddr
+1 -1
I am now interested in this arc
I am now interested in this arc
octafish
+5 -0
In silhouette Ramses' Top Cat origins are even more clear. Only Ramses would have beaten the crap out of Officer Dibble.
In silhouette Ramses' Top Cat origins are even more clear. Only Ramses would have beaten the crap out of Officer Dibble.
earendil
+0 -0
See, Top Cat is a classic cartoon I can get behind. Chubby for you.
See, Top Cat is a classic cartoon I can get behind. Chubby for you.
almajo
+0 -0
Eeep! I boosted the strip to 4.8. Probably the most meaningful thing I've done all day.
Eeep! I boosted the strip to 4.8. Probably the most meaningful thing I've done all day.
speccer
+0 -0
It's sitting at 4.9 right now. If any Achewood strip to date can have a 5.0 for an extended period of time, it's this one.
Maybe 5.1 if we all try hard enough.
It's sitting at 4.9 right now. If any Achewood strip to date can have a 5.0 for an extended period of time, it's this one.
Maybe 5.1 if we all try hard enough.
hellofditties
+1 -0
I'm wondering why it's the highest rated strip.
I am scared to rate it, I don't want to make anyone mad.
I'm wondering why it's the highest rated strip.
I am scared to rate it, I don't want to make anyone mad.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Ramses has been a long time comin...
Ramses has been a long time comin...
chachibenji
+0 -0
We are all afraid to get hell of beatings from a fictional badass cat/we all have much respect for a fictional badass cat.
We are all afraid to get hell of beatings from a fictional badass cat/we all have much respect for a fictional badass cat.
whiteturtle
+0 -0
I love this song
I love this song
earendil
+0 -0
I still think The Future deserves to be the only 5.0 rated strip. I'm pretty sure it broke the record for length of time staying at 5, but I don't feel like digging through its comments to find out for sure. Anyway, if Ramses Smuckles could be bothered with computers and the internet, by now I'm sure he would have cowed Assetbar itself into submission.
I still think The Future deserves to be the only 5.0 rated strip. I'm pretty sure it broke the record for length of time staying at 5, but I don't feel like digging through its comments to find out for sure. Anyway, if Ramses Smuckles could be bothered with computers and the internet, by now I'm sure he would have cowed Assetbar itself into submission.
snoutbuster
+2 -0
A setup is in the works. Showbiz is Ray's brother. Ray is Beef's brother. Showbiz is Rodney's mother. A setup is in the works.
A setup is in the works. Showbiz is Ray's brother. Ray is Beef's brother. Showbiz is Rodney's mother. A setup is in the works.
octafish
+0 -0
A comment left by octafish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, dwodles, milkpants, Boyd)
A comment left by octafish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by gladi8orrex, dwodles, milkpants, Boyd)
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by milkpants, clintisiceman, tellumo)
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by milkpants, clintisiceman, tellumo)
octafish
+0 -0
That is a [damn lie[/i]! Isn't it? Guys, tell me I didn't make the same joke as the writers of Scary Movie . Guys?
That is a [damn lie[/i]! Isn't it? Guys, tell me I didn't make the same joke as the writers of Scary Movie . Guys?
yearsinhotclaws
+1 -0
You can have my gun when whiteturtle is done with it.
You can have my gun when whiteturtle is done with it.
daidai
+0 -0
'Sa bloody mornin' here on AssetBar. Yessiree.
'Sa bloody mornin' here on AssetBar. Yessiree.
loneal
+4 -2
...And my axe.
...And my axe.
gladi8orrex
+19 -2
lol dun u mean "an my broom an' mop mabe" lol
lol dun u mean "an my broom an' mop mabe" lol
earendil
+0 -0
This is the first time I have actually laughed out loud at anything you have done gladi8orrex. Unless you count the classic translations of [u]is so lol[/i] but I don't think that's really your work. Anyway, you have perfectly captured here the essence of the worst dregs of the internet. 4chan would be proud of you.
This is the first time I have actually laughed out loud at anything you have done gladi8orrex. Unless you count the classic translations of [u]is so lol[/i] but I don't think that's really your work. Anyway, you have perfectly captured here the essence of the worst dregs of the internet. 4chan would be proud of you.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
...many bbcode mixups today. i am not a fan.
...many bbcode mixups today. i am not a fan.
hbaranov
+0 -0
TOO SOON
TOO SOON
daidai
+0 -0
You don't understand how tempted I am. But I won't. I won't.
You don't understand how tempted I am. But I won't. I won't.
hedonismbot
+4 -0
I heard you were wounded by an axe once
I heard you were wounded by an axe once
octafish
+1 -0
Axe wound is one of the nastiest synonyms for vagina ever. So you get a chubby from me!
Axe wound is one of the nastiest synonyms for vagina ever. So you get a chubby from me!
onepapertiger
+0 -0
octa, this showed up in the recent comments with the text cut off at "vag." Thank you for your conservation of words; you spoke Directly and made your point. It has Earned you a chubby.
octa, this showed up in the recent comments with the text cut off at "vag." Thank you for your conservation of words; you spoke Directly and made your point. It has Earned you a chubby.
dwodles
+0 -0
Nice!
Nice!
octafish
+0 -0
A comment left by octafish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by jollysaintpete, ActualTaunt, nphares)
A comment left by octafish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by jollysaintpete, ActualTaunt, nphares)
terrainasaur
+0 -0
i almost lamed you, too. yr beefheart username saved you though, at the last minute. then i accidentally chubbied you when i was going to hit "reply". so there you go, sir. take it and run. run with glee through your neon meate dreams.
i almost lamed you, too. yr beefheart username saved you though, at the last minute. then i accidentally chubbied you when i was going to hit "reply". so there you go, sir. take it and run. run with glee through your neon meate dreams.
octafish
+1 -0
weee heee heee heee Look Ma I got a chubby!
weee heee heee heee Look Ma I got a chubby!
earendil
+1 -0
um that is so wrong.
um that is so wrong.
earendil
+1 -0
Like first of all it's just wrong, and then on another level, either:
a. you are trying to sex up your mom, and you couldn't even get on a full erection to show her. good luck. or:
b. you possess such a unique combination of mental and virile impotence that you are proud to show your ma your chubby.
Argh, I just imagined Forrest Gump saying that line. And it makes me sad.
Like first of all it's just wrong, and then on another level, either:
a. you are trying to sex up your mom, and you couldn't even get on a full erection to show her. good luck. or:
b. you possess such a unique combination of mental and virile impotence that you are proud to show your ma your chubby.
Argh, I just imagined Forrest Gump saying that line. And it makes me sad.
gladi8orrex
+0 -1
lol it rimes
lol it rimes
tellumo
+1 -0
I was pretty surprised that you got lamed as well.
You do not lame the best detective picture of all time.
I was pretty surprised that you got lamed as well.
You do not lame the best detective picture of all time.
octafish
+0 -0
Word! Polanski all slitting Nicholson's nostril, Faye Dunaway all smockin' hot, and John Fucking Huston all "Course I'm respectable. I'm old. Politicians, ugly buildings, and whores all get respectable if they last long enough".
Word! Polanski all slitting Nicholson's nostril, Faye Dunaway all smockin' hot, and John Fucking Huston all "Course I'm respectable. I'm old. Politicians, ugly buildings, and whores all get respectable if they last long enough".
octafish
+0 -0
Fuck "smockin' hot" fuck it.
Fuck "smockin' hot" fuck it.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Characters in Thomas Hardy novels are usually smockin' hot.
Characters in Thomas Hardy novels are usually smockin' hot.
hamscout
+1 -0
...and usually pursued by shepherds who want to flock them.
...and usually pursued by shepherds who want to flock them.
tekende
+1 -1
Don't knock my smock or I'll clean your clock.
Don't knock my smock or I'll clean your clock.
lawbot
+0 -0
I've never understood why people find Faye Dunaway attractive.
I've never understood why people find Faye Dunaway attractive.
octafish
+0 -0
Its the eyes.
...and her boobs.
Its the eyes.
...and her boobs.
foea
+0 -0
and the 25 years ago.
and the 25 years ago.
pogo
+2 -0
The sheer energy of that skinny body and intense face. She's like a cat who will tear you up.
The sheer energy of that skinny body and intense face. She's like a cat who will tear you up.
syrupykeyboard
+0 -0
He's not heavy, he's my brother.
He's not heavy, he's my brother.
pogo
+0 -0
Puppy handface! Gets a chub.
Puppy handface! Gets a chub.
professorhazard
+0 -0
I peed a little bit.
I peed a little bit.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
*whispers* untuck your shirt at the front dude
*whispers* untuck your shirt at the front dude
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Unless it was tucked deeply when he peed, then the evidence would be there for all. You have to think these things through
Unless it was tucked deeply when he peed, then the evidence would be there for all. You have to think these things through
professorhazard
+0 -0
Listen, if I was worried about keeping it a secret, I wouldn't have rated the asset as "Pro". A good squirt at the arrival of The Man with Blood on His Hands is nothing to be ashamed of, and is in fact something that warrants requesting a High Five.
Don't leave me hanging, Acheworld.
Listen, if I was worried about keeping it a secret, I wouldn't have rated the asset as "Pro". A good squirt at the arrival of The Man with Blood on His Hands is nothing to be ashamed of, and is in fact something that warrants requesting a High Five.
Don't leave me hanging, Acheworld.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Uh, wash your hands first dude
Uh, wash your hands first dude
thorfinn
+0 -0
He pissed in his pants, there is no need to wash his hands as they have not touched anything.
He pissed in his pants, there is no need to wash his hands as they have not touched anything.
lateadopter
+0 -0
And what's this with hedonismbot being squeamish about bodily fluids? If we believed the torrent of crude sexual comments, he's knee-deep in juices, waiting for the plumber to show up and fix the sump pump in his basement playroom.
And what's this with hedonismbot being squeamish about bodily fluids? If we believed the torrent of crude sexual comments, he's knee-deep in juices, waiting for the plumber to show up and fix the sump pump in his basement playroom.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
hedonismBOT. he's worried about rust.
hedonismBOT. he's worried about rust.
falseprophet
+18 -1
Damn is every character gonna get a relative show up and cause trouble for the scribes on the police beat?
PHILIPPE TIMES Friday Facts!
Police Blotter
June 14
East Achewood %u2013 An elementary school teacher reported that several of her students returned from recess holding cards, with dirty statements such as FUK U SHTFASE and LIKK MY DOODY DADDY scribbled on them. Their mothers were promptly called so don't worry.
Downtown Achewood %u2013 There's a guy wearing dirty clothes and with corn kernels for teeth always in the city and people know him because he's the guy who always says the world is going to end soon and everyone ignores him because they don't want to be sad. He's usually scared about it but this time he was really scared but no one knows what made him feel that way. He suddenly jumped up on a water fountain and started peeing into it while reciting the dictionary.
Achewood Mental Hospital %u2013 A big kid who likes to ride through town on a motorcycle has been having really bad headaches so some friends of his in the Army told him to have naptime there for a few days. He woke up in the middle of the night because of a really bad nightmare and the nurses tried to give him his pills, but his latent psychokinetic powers awoke and he blew up the whole area. He was last seen flying through the sky screaming TOMORROW HAS MADE A PHONE CALL TO TODAY. A lot of kids missed their bedtime.
Damn is every character gonna get a relative show up and cause trouble for the scribes on the police beat?
PHILIPPE TIMES Friday Facts!
Police Blotter
June 14
East Achewood %u2013 An elementary school teacher reported that several of her students returned from recess holding cards, with dirty statements such as FUK U SHTFASE and LIKK MY DOODY DADDY scribbled on them. Their mothers were promptly called so don't worry.
Downtown Achewood %u2013 There's a guy wearing dirty clothes and with corn kernels for teeth always in the city and people know him because he's the guy who always says the world is going to end soon and everyone ignores him because they don't want to be sad. He's usually scared about it but this time he was really scared but no one knows what made him feel that way. He suddenly jumped up on a water fountain and started peeing into it while reciting the dictionary.
Achewood Mental Hospital %u2013 A big kid who likes to ride through town on a motorcycle has been having really bad headaches so some friends of his in the Army told him to have naptime there for a few days. He woke up in the middle of the night because of a really bad nightmare and the nurses tried to give him his pills, but his latent psychokinetic powers awoke and he blew up the whole area. He was last seen flying through the sky screaming TOMORROW HAS MADE A PHONE CALL TO TODAY. A lot of kids missed their bedtime.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Ah phyuck me.
Ah phyuck me.
chuvak
+0 -1
But, nice one though. NICE ONE.
But, nice one though. NICE ONE.
falseprophet
+0 -0
Also, Friday is the 13th, not the 14th...
...
FRIDAY THE 13TH?!?!?!?
OHHHHHHHH SHIIIIIIIIIIIIT!
Also, Friday is the 13th, not the 14th...
...
FRIDAY THE 13TH?!?!?!?
OHHHHHHHH SHIIIIIIIIIIIIT!
maximus
+0 -0
when are you going to learn to not cut and paste from Word. I mean WHEN, man?
when are you going to learn to not cut and paste from Word. I mean WHEN, man?
kamet
+0 -0
Your new avatar is deliciously creepy.
Your new avatar is deliciously creepy.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
horrorshow...
horrorshow...
dr_strangeglove
+0 -0
was that last one a big part of the movie Akira ?
was that last one a big part of the movie Akira ?
falseprophet
+0 -0
VICTOLY!
Note: This is not racism. This is yet another specific reference to something Japanese.
VICTOLY!
Note: This is not racism. This is yet another specific reference to something Japanese.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Or is it...
Or is it...
hamscout
+0 -0
I thought falseprophet was just holding his tongue...
... I was born on a pirate ship... VICTOLY!!!
I thought falseprophet was just holding his tongue...
... I was born on a pirate ship... VICTOLY!!!
chuvak
+16 -0
"The man with wedding gifts in his hands."
"The man with wedding gifts in his hands."
maximus
+0 -0
using the dough hook to get all "Braveheart" on the unruly guests
using the dough hook to get all "Braveheart" on the unruly guests
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Just a theory:
It's somewhat clear that one of the men who drove the GOF 4WDrives had an arm band just like Ramses (suggesting he was one of the drivers). All 4Wdrives were beaten down by Beef and Ray. I would very much hope that this beat-down will explain Ramses' respect.
I also hope he brings it up with Beef after his second bottle of Christian Brothers, almost-cries, then disappears. I imagine this would boost Beefs flagging self-esteem a little.
Just a theory:
It's somewhat clear that one of the men who drove the GOF 4WDrives had an arm band just like Ramses (suggesting he was one of the drivers). All 4Wdrives were beaten down by Beef and Ray. I would very much hope that this beat-down will explain Ramses' respect.
I also hope he brings it up with Beef after his second bottle of Christian Brothers, almost-cries, then disappears. I imagine this would boost Beefs flagging self-esteem a little.
earendil
+0 -0
I'm sorry, but even the sharp-bodied, sharper-minded team of Ray and Beef could not take down Ramses Luther Smuckles. We all saw the way that he cowed them into submission with the mere power of his presence. If he had been driving one of the jeeps, I don't think either of them would still be alive.
Plus, I'm pretty sure that he approved of their conduct; if he had been upset that Ray and Beef broke the rules of the GOF, I don't think he would have shown up to grace them with his presence after the fight.
I'm sorry, but even the sharp-bodied, sharper-minded team of Ray and Beef could not take down Ramses Luther Smuckles. We all saw the way that he cowed them into submission with the mere power of his presence. If he had been driving one of the jeeps, I don't think either of them would still be alive.
Plus, I'm pretty sure that he approved of their conduct; if he had been upset that Ray and Beef broke the rules of the GOF, I don't think he would have shown up to grace them with his presence after the fight.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I fear nothing of the sort will be revealed and our questions will remain unanswered. And so... we wait...
I fear nothing of the sort will be revealed and our questions will remain unanswered. And so... we wait...
raysdangnachos
+0 -0
And certainly not bearing gifts.
And certainly not bearing gifts.
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Minivet, Lumus, tellumo)
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Minivet, Lumus, tellumo)
whoper
+1 -0
One of my (many) favorite aspects of Onstad's writing is his ability to rattle off metaphors for trashiness in a way that I imagine is similar to how Philippe makes up polyglot palindromes.
I tried doing so myself, but the best I could come up with was "talk about daytime television during work hours and drink Pabst Blue Ribbon in public."
One of my (many) favorite aspects of Onstad's writing is his ability to rattle off metaphors for trashiness in a way that I imagine is similar to how Philippe makes up polyglot palindromes.
I tried doing so myself, but the best I could come up with was "talk about daytime television during work hours and drink Pabst Blue Ribbon in public."
bumfighter
+0 -0
Dammit, but that sounds tasty. I'd start watching some daytime teevee just to pretend-roll with that crowd.
Dammit, but that sounds tasty. I'd start watching some daytime teevee just to pretend-roll with that crowd.
spinynorman
+3 -0
"Two scoundrels got fresh with a chain-smoking trailer trailer pixie who later attacked them after they said that her arms were all skinny like a tall dog's leg."
That is pure poetry, if you disagree I will be your waiter at Cafe Le Fuck You, where the main dish will be your ass, served up cold
"Two scoundrels got fresh with a chain-smoking trailer trailer pixie who later attacked them after they said that her arms were all skinny like a tall dog's leg."
That is pure poetry, if you disagree I will be your waiter at Cafe Le Fuck You, where the main dish will be your ass, served up cold
spinynorman
+0 -0
minus one trailer.
minus one trailer.
tipist
+4 -0
This is like Van Gogh asking people to ignore one of the stars in his Starry Night, or Franklin W. Dixon saying he accidentally put in the 2nd Hardy boy.
This is like Van Gogh asking people to ignore one of the stars in his Starry Night, or Franklin W. Dixon saying he accidentally put in the 2nd Hardy boy.
pogo
+0 -0
Oh, that trailer trailer pixie, how she tempts me with her trash trash.
Oh, that trailer trailer pixie, how she tempts me with her trash trash.
spinynorman
+1 -0
My dancing feet are twitching. I feel a song coming on.
My dancing feet are twitching. I feel a song coming on.
slackojones
+0 -0
I can't believe this hasn't been posted yet: Fuck Heineken... PABST BLUE RIBBON!
I can't believe this hasn't been posted yet: Fuck Heineken... PABST BLUE RIBBON!
pogo
+0 -0
Pabst rant: Oh how the mighty have fallen? Back in my hometown, the beer that made Milwaukee famous was Schiltz, and where is it now? There was a Pabst mansion, and the old brewery grounds are now being gentrified into some sort of shopping village, but the great Pabst is no longer a premium brew, it is among the cheapest, brewed everywhere but its birthplace, Milwaukee, where only Miller survives. (Don't get me started on Blatz.)
Pabst rant: Oh how the mighty have fallen? Back in my hometown, the beer that made Milwaukee famous was Schiltz, and where is it now? There was a Pabst mansion, and the old brewery grounds are now being gentrified into some sort of shopping village, but the great Pabst is no longer a premium brew, it is among the cheapest, brewed everywhere but its birthplace, Milwaukee, where only Miller survives. (Don't get me started on Blatz.)
bixschmix
+0 -0
And they just stopped making Rolling Rock in Latrobe, too! Thank god there's still Yuengling...
And they just stopped making Rolling Rock in Latrobe, too! Thank god there's still Yuengling...
pogo
+0 -0
Thank the Lord for microbrewers.
Thank the Lord for microbrewers.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Microbrewers are the lords way of saying sorry for Tsunamis.
Microbrewers are the lords way of saying sorry for Tsunamis.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
"Get drunk kids! I'm killing you all off".
"Get drunk kids! I'm killing you all off".
maximus
+0 -0
he put this disease in me
he put this disease in me
octafish
+0 -0
Sooooo yesterday dude. Whoever did it then got my chubby.
Sooooo yesterday dude. Whoever did it then got my chubby.
westacular
+17 -0
Several internet users were found severely beaten behind Assetbar. They said they were very sorry for having rated the latest Achewood strip less than a five, and that they would correct their errors once they regained the ability to click a mouse.
One user who declined medical treatment reported that he was scrolling up to increase his rating "immediately."
Several internet users were found severely beaten behind Assetbar. They said they were very sorry for having rated the latest Achewood strip less than a five, and that they would correct their errors once they regained the ability to click a mouse.
One user who declined medical treatment reported that he was scrolling up to increase his rating "immediately."
atrusrand
+0 -0
It takes class for a man to be able to beat up these dudes, yet improve their lives. True style from exactly where I'd expect it.
It takes class for a man to be able to beat up these dudes, yet improve their lives. True style from exactly where I'd expect it.
pogo
+0 -0
That's what most youngesters need is a good thrashing!
That's what most youngesters need is a good thrashing!
spinynorman
+1 -0
I honestly do think that kids need to get their ass handed to them at least once when they're young. It gives them the impression that maybe they're not as important and they think they are, and maybe they should watch what they do and say to others. I mean, I got one or two when I was a kid, and now I'm perfectly fine except for the nightly bedwetting and tendency to become sexually aroused by the sight of boiling water.
Yours sincerely Mrs. Brigadier Nordstrom Nordstrom Norman, Jr.
I honestly do think that kids need to get their ass handed to them at least once when they're young. It gives them the impression that maybe they're not as important and they think they are, and maybe they should watch what they do and say to others. I mean, I got one or two when I was a kid, and now I'm perfectly fine except for the nightly bedwetting and tendency to become sexually aroused by the sight of boiling water.
Yours sincerely Mrs. Brigadier Nordstrom Nordstrom Norman, Jr.
smilebuddha
+0 -0
Dear Assetbar: I don't like where this sort of toadying is going. Should the young men of Britain be beaten like gongs just to prove a point? And when will the French start taking showers again? Saint Swithin's Day?
Yours sincerely, etc.,
Doctor Brigadier Sir Baden-Whulcrump (Mrs.)
Dear Assetbar: I don't like where this sort of toadying is going. Should the young men of Britain be beaten like gongs just to prove a point? And when will the French start taking showers again? Saint Swithin's Day?
Yours sincerely, etc.,
Doctor Brigadier Sir Baden-Whulcrump (Mrs.)
awko
+0 -0
To be fair though, the way in which the water behaves, bubbling more violently with as the temperature rises, heated clouds of vapour erupting from deep within, the sheer danger of the entire spectacle...
God, I'm barring up at the mere thought of it all.
To be fair though, the way in which the water behaves, bubbling more violently with as the temperature rises, heated clouds of vapour erupting from deep within, the sheer danger of the entire spectacle...
God, I'm barring up at the mere thought of it all.
awko
+0 -0
Pah, forgive the errant "with" in the last post. It's what happens when you try to write erotica in the wee hours of the morning.
Pah, forgive the errant "with" in the last post. It's what happens when you try to write erotica in the wee hours of the morning.
lux
+0 -0
The crisp sizzle as it touches cool metal, the hissing - almost purring , I should say - of its increasingly excited bubbling...
The crisp sizzle as it touches cool metal, the hissing - almost purring , I should say - of its increasingly excited bubbling...
whiteturtle
+1 -0
I'm becoming a gas!...I'm becoming a gas!...I'm Ohhhhahhhahhahhhhaaaa!
I'm becoming a gas!...I'm becoming a gas!...I'm Ohhhhahhhahhahhhhaaaa!
spinynorman
+0 -0
Dude, have you seen that one vid of the naked fatty who just puts a pot of water on the stove, and he just stands there lookin at it, and....
Okay, yeah. I reached my limit for AM weirdness. I'm cashing out, see you guys later.
Dude, have you seen that one vid of the naked fatty who just puts a pot of water on the stove, and he just stands there lookin at it, and....
Okay, yeah. I reached my limit for AM weirdness. I'm cashing out, see you guys later.
awko
+0 -0
Man, you can't say you've seen something like that and then up and leave without providing a link.
For shame.
Man, you can't say you've seen something like that and then up and leave without providing a link.
For shame.
sdskyle
+0 -0
I still wet the bed sometimes.
Not cool.
Not funny.
Not a good comment on assetbar.
I still wet the bed sometimes.
Not cool.
Not funny.
Not a good comment on assetbar.
foea
+0 -0
Phew! I bet that's a job and a half, Ma'am!
Phew! I bet that's a job and a half, Ma'am!
layzerblade
+0 -0
Every kid who thinks life is simple should find a bigger kid with whom he has a legitimate grievance, challenge him to a fight, and lose handily. There can be no better preparation for the real world. I suspect many of our current leaders have never had this happen.
Every kid who thinks life is simple should find a bigger kid with whom he has a legitimate grievance, challenge him to a fight, and lose handily. There can be no better preparation for the real world. I suspect many of our current leaders have never had this happen.
shades
+0 -0
Oh man, is it ever good to see Luther
Oh man, is it ever good to see Luther
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Thats what they said at the Diet of Worms.
Cue Gladi8orex saying "lozorcopterz u cannae eat da wormzz!??!!?!"
Thats what they said at the Diet of Worms.
Cue Gladi8orex saying "lozorcopterz u cannae eat da wormzz!??!!?!"
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Is Gladi8orex Scottish, now?
Is Gladi8orex Scottish, now?
usversusthem
+1 -0
Man I think the only proper response to a strip such as this is a " YES " and maybe a fist pump or two.
Note: Lawbots need not apply.
Man I think the only proper response to a strip such as this is a " YES " and maybe a fist pump or two.
Note: Lawbots need not apply.
partadver
+0 -0
Bumped it to 4.9!
Bumped it to 4.9!
weapon86
+1 -0
I feel a calm. A calm from knowing that someone shall be hushed.
I feel a calm. A calm from knowing that someone shall be hushed.
bumfighter
+1 -0
The most perfect wedding ever would have both Ramses and Showbiz attending. Fuck, it's like a snake eating its own tail.
The most perfect wedding ever would have both Ramses and Showbiz attending. Fuck, it's like a snake eating its own tail.
hbaranov
+0 -0
Ouroborosphilosophy
Ouroborosphilosophy
octafish
+0 -0
Hoop Snake
Hoop Snake
professorhazard
+0 -0
Hey guys are we talking about cryptozoology
Hey guys are we talking about cryptozoology
maximus
+0 -0
and the omphalos brings us full circle:
[IMGS OFF]
and the omphalos brings us full circle:
[IMGS OFF]
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Ba-dum bum pssh.
Ba-dum bum pssh.
layzerblade
+0 -0
Or a... dick sucking its own dick... ?
Or a... dick sucking its own dick... ?
skoora
+0 -0
Once I read the word "beaten," I knew...I knew.
Once I read the word "beaten," I knew...I knew.
pppoa
+0 -0
Achewood: still frighteningly awesome.
Achewood: still frighteningly awesome.
intelligentblue
+1 -0
Why does this all seem so...AWESOME..
Why does this all seem so...AWESOME..
maximus
+0 -0
picture of Star Wars cast in rock band in 3..2...
picture of Star Wars cast in rock band in 3..2...
i_love_kate
+0 -0
FILE NOT FOUND
FILE NOT FOUND
maximus
+5 -1
amateurs.
[IMGS OFF]
(apologies for scrollage)
amateurs.
[IMGS OFF]
(apologies for scrollage)
rykan
+0 -0
This is indeed awesome. A chubby for you, sir.
This is indeed awesome. A chubby for you, sir.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Pfft. The original had Leia, too.
Pfft. The original had Leia, too.
intelligentblue
+0 -0
this is not the whole pic. Leia is in it, too. A LAME FOR YOU SIR.
nothing personal.
this is not the whole pic. Leia is in it, too. A LAME FOR YOU SIR.
nothing personal.
namdnas
+0 -0
The marriage arc inherently allows for monumental reunions and obscure character clashes.
For all anyone knows, Mr. Smuckles could mount Pat...in a confessional.
Display of dominance only.
The marriage arc inherently allows for monumental reunions and obscure character clashes.
For all anyone knows, Mr. Smuckles could mount Pat...in a confessional.
Display of dominance only.
stereo
+0 -0
Pat insulted the beer for being "not vegan friendly"
Pat insulted the beer for being "not vegan friendly"
professorhazard
+0 -0
... at a party.
... at a party.
wonelove
+0 -0
Only Ray's father could leave a path of destruction and beatdowns that fill up an entire police blotter.
They're all little episodes in themselves.
Only Ray's father could leave a path of destruction and beatdowns that fill up an entire police blotter.
They're all little episodes in themselves.
fireking
+2 -0
I saw the silhouette and I knew. However, Ramses Luther Smuckles didn't take too kindly to my reading ahead, so my Internet went down for three hours.
I saw the silhouette and I knew. However, Ramses Luther Smuckles didn't take too kindly to my reading ahead, so my Internet went down for three hours.
johnmatrix
+0 -2
We aren't going to start making Chuck Norris-esque jokes about Ramses, are we?
We aren't going to start making Chuck Norris-esque jokes about Ramses, are we?
speccer
+0 -0
NO
NO
odei
+0 -0
EVER
EVER
chachibenji
+0 -0
Noever?
Noever?
maximus
+0 -0
NEVER!
NEVER!
kamet
+0 -0
Maybe.
Maybe.
whiteturtle
+1 -1
I'm sorry I have to lame this so that no one sees it.
THOUGHTCRIME
I'm sorry I have to lame this so that no one sees it.
THOUGHTCRIME
professorhazard
+0 -1
They say that Ramses Luthor's tears can cure cancer, but he has never wept was weaned on chicken milk and cocaine
They say that Ramses Luthor
hellofditties
+5 -0
Your internet... went down on you?
No cookies for you.
Your internet... went down on you?
No cookies for you.
miseryandthesun
+0 -0
I just shat bricks.
Can someone get that?
I just shat bricks.
Can someone get that?
hellofditties
+0 -0
I really really hope Todd comes back for the wedding.
I really really hope Todd comes back for the wedding.
heccibiggs
+0 -0
He'll be there; he has to lead the cigarette break.
He'll be there; he has to lead the cigarette break.
bondijames
+0 -0
Onstad has given us all an early birthday gift with this strip.
Onstad has given us all an early birthday gift with this strip.
hassanoleary
+0 -0
Considering my birthday was this week, this present is either slightly late or extremely early.
Considering my birthday was this week, this present is either slightly late or extremely early.
morypcaina
+0 -0
This strip doesn't need to focus on its grades. It's doing just fine.
I love the groups of strips involving multiple characters in succession reading the same print medium for different things. While they could be boring, they are frequently more interesting precisely because of how novel the content of each new strip always is.
This strip doesn't need to focus on its grades. It's doing just fine.
I love the groups of strips involving multiple characters in succession reading the same print medium for different things. While they could be boring, they are frequently more interesting precisely because of how novel the content of each new strip always is.
straw
+1 -0
I like that the title of the comic is also the next line. It's like there are two alt-texts!
I like that the title of the comic is also the next line. It's like there are two alt-texts!
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
A comment left by yearsinhotclaws was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by speccer, gladi8orrex, invidious, snidedk, mortshire, howl, Lumus, Charcoal, hellofditties, Doc_Rostov, nathanielperson, lastlarf, Tipist)
A comment left by yearsinhotclaws was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by speccer, gladi8orrex, invidious, snidedk, mortshire, howl, Lumus, Charcoal, hellofditties, Doc_Rostov, nathanielperson, lastlarf, Tipist)
echidnaboy
+13 -0
"Those are some big words coming from a man with two broken arms."
"What? My arms are f- AAAAAAAAAAAAAA "
"Those are some big words coming from a man with two broken arms."
"What? My arms are f- AAAAAAAAAAAAAA "
autrepoupee
+2 -0
I used to posit that I could beat up any cat, toddler, or small, young dog.
Then I met a cat.
A cat that changed my life forever.
I used to posit that I could beat up any cat, toddler, or small, young dog.
Then I met a cat.
A cat that changed my life forever.
spectre
+0 -0
A comment left by spectre was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by cblaines, RaysDangNachos, hellofditties, turnabout)
A comment left by spectre was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by cblaines, RaysDangNachos, hellofditties, turnabout)
falseprophet
+1 -0
Maybe you were lamed for calling the man Luther Ramses when his name is Ramses Luther.
Did you ever think of that?
Maybe you were lamed for calling the man Luther Ramses when his name is Ramses Luther.
Did you ever think of that?
maximus
+0 -0
you are so lucky I used up my allotment (seems I get 1 every 6 weeks), so here is a v-lame
you are so lucky I used up my allotment (seems I get 1 every 6 weeks), so here is a v-lame
woodenteeth
+0 -0
First v-lame ever? You got some balls. People voice their displeasure but this is the first time i've seen it writtend down. You're a pioneer.
First v-lame ever? You got some balls. People voice their displeasure but this is the first time i've seen it writtend down. You're a pioneer.
lawbot
+0 -0
NO
NO
hedonismbot
+0 -0
MORE
MORE
octafish
+1 -0
PENCILS
PENCILS
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Excellent reference! I'll be going this exact route for another one soon, so don't be alarmed
Excellent reference! I'll be going this exact route for another one soon, so don't be alarmed
tekende
+0 -1
W-what? What does this reference?
W-what? What does this reference?
octafish
+1 -0
Didn't you go to school? Didn't you kids ever ROCK ?
[IMGS OFF]
Didn't you go to school? Didn't you kids ever ROCK ?
[IMGS OFF]
tekende
+0 -1
Ohhhh.
Ohhhh.
spectre
+0 -1
Wait a minute. I'm from Florida. How does a Police Blotter make "any newspaper a newspaper from Florida"? I mean, we've got crime, but so does everybody else. Our crime isn't "worse" than other crime. It's just bloodier, more pointless and all-pervading. Could happen to anybody. So there.
Wait a minute. I'm from Florida. How does a Police Blotter make "any newspaper a newspaper from Florida"? I mean, we've got crime, but so does everybody else. Our crime isn't "worse" than other crime. It's just bloodier, more pointless and all-pervading. Could happen to anybody. So there.
clapyourhands
+1 -0
Well today's blotter is full of crimes committed by an old person, I imagine making it resemble the blotters in Florida.
Well today's blotter is full of crimes committed by an old person, I imagine making it resemble the blotters in Florida.
nbeer
+0 -0
Colbert would argue that this is a direct result of being "America's wang." Perhaps if y'all could collectively try to be less geographically wang-y, your crimes would become more pedestrian & not involve quite so many escaped pythons.
Colbert would argue that this is a direct result of being "America's wang." Perhaps if y'all could collectively try to be less geographically wang-y, your crimes would become more pedestrian & not involve quite so many escaped pythons.
thegoblins
+1 -0
They DO say the South will rise again.
They DO say the South will rise again.
pogo
+0 -0
When we hear the word "Florida" up north, we think of old farts on golf carts and retirement communities where the news is about missing walkers and crutches.
When we hear the word "Florida" up north, we think of old farts on golf carts and retirement communities where the news is about missing walkers and crutches.
spectre
+0 -0
Wow. all those years of MIAMI VICE and the South Beach cult really WERE for nothing.
Wow. all those years of MIAMI VICE and the South Beach cult really WERE for nothing.
pogo
+0 -0
Wait, Miami is in Florida?
Wait, Miami is in Florida?
tekende
+0 -1
Florida has a reputation for having a lot of low-class trashy individuals living there. I don't really know how true this is, as the only times I've been to Florida was to go to Disney World or Universal Studios or whatnot.
Florida has a reputation for having a lot of low-class trashy individuals living there. I don't really know how true this is, as the only times I've been to Florida was to go to Disney World or Universal Studios or whatnot.
westsider8
+1 -0
And in what way did these trips not confirm the reputation?
And in what way did these trips not confirm the reputation?
sncether
+0 -0
When you're very young, it's sometimes hard to tell the difference between a "cast member" with the Disney Spirit and a balloon salesman strung out on meth.
When you're very young, it's sometimes hard to tell the difference between a "cast member" with the Disney Spirit and a balloon salesman strung out on meth.
tekende
+0 -1
Because Disney World is unlikely to show you a lot of Florida inhabitants? It's mostly full of tourists.
Because Disney World is unlikely to show you a lot of Florida inhabitants? It's mostly full of tourists.
pogo
+0 -0
No, he meant that to many, Disnet World itself is low-class trash. But Ray's comment was because of the retirement community element, I'm sure, not the southern trash element.
No, he meant that to many, Disnet World itself is low-class trash. But Ray's comment was because of the retirement community element, I'm sure, not the southern trash element.
pogo
+0 -0
Disney, (the "T" is right next to the "Y", so close)
Disney, (the "T" is right next to the "Y", so close)
catgrl131
+1 -0
Well, to be fair, in Eurodisney it is spelled Disnet.
Well, to be fair, in Eurodisney it is spelled Disnet.
spectre
+0 -0
Because the low-class trashy people were from out of state.
Because the low-class trashy people were from out of state.
phy
+3 -0
The point is there is so much weird and trashy crime in Florida that reading just the police blotter anywhere else is like reading the whole rest of the paper in Florida. Two things come in concentrate form from Florida: orange juice and crime .
The point is there is so much weird and trashy crime in Florida that reading just the police blotter anywhere else is like reading the whole rest of the paper in Florida. Two things come in concentrate form from Florida: orange juice and crime .
orvel
+0 -0
This is the same reason Florida has its own tag at Fark.com.
This is the same reason Florida has its own tag at Fark.com.
hamscout
+0 -0
Also featured in "Germany or Florida" on Love Line...
Also featured in "Germany or Florida" on Love Line...
daidai
+0 -1
That Crate and Barrel woman is about to get her ugly Showbiz-wearin-a-scarf lookin' ass beat .
Her face will all be like Deep Impact.
Or Armageddon. Or Meteor. Or Dr. Strangelove.
That Crate and Barrel woman is about to get her ugly Showbiz-wearin-a-scarf lookin' ass beat .
Her face will all be like Deep Impact.
Or Armageddon. Or Meteor. Or Dr. Strangelove.
tekende
+0 -2
Ramses Luther Smuckles would not hit a woman. Shame on you for suggesting such a thing.
Ramses Luther Smuckles would not hit a woman. Shame on you for suggesting such a thing.
falseprophet
+1 -1
He would just whip out his dick to let her know what she can now never have and then Leave without zipping his pants back up.
He would just whip out his dick to let her know what she can now never have and then Leave without zipping his pants back up.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
That is silly. He'd trip. As would several people within a 15 foot radius
That is silly. He'd trip. As would several people within a 15 foot radius
chachibenji
+0 -0
The man has a rather incredible inseam.
The man has a rather incredible inseam.
hamscout
+0 -0
This is partly due to his pocketful of horses.
This is partly due to his pocketful of horses.
kickstart
+0 -0
Some of them used?
Some of them used?
pogo
+0 -0
Maybe "she's" a trannie!
Maybe "she's" a trannie!
pygmalion00
+0 -0
HE KICK'S MEN'S ASSES
AND HE VOTES.
HE KICK'S MEN'S ASSES
AND HE VOTES.
falseprophet
+6 -0
I have a feeling that Ramses Luther is a superdelegate. He probably found some nerd rappin mush about votin for Hilary and stared him down until he changed his vote. Then Ramses said "The hell you just gonna flip-flop like a whore from Tijuana? Ain't you got no dignity?" Then he took the man's microphone and turned to the camera and told Wolf Blitzer he was votin for himself.
I have a feeling that Ramses Luther is a superdelegate. He probably found some nerd rappin mush about votin for Hilary and stared him down until he changed his vote. Then Ramses said "The hell you just gonna flip-flop like a whore from Tijuana? Ain't you got no dignity?" Then he took the man's microphone and turned to the camera and told Wolf Blitzer he was votin for himself.
pygmalion00
+0 -0
He would then be the Democratic Nominee, with the only vote cast on the final ballot at the convention. I say this because well...we all know what happened at The Great Outdoor Fight.
He would then be the Democratic Nominee, with the only vote cast on the final ballot at the convention. I say this because well...we all know what happened at The Great Outdoor Fight.
spinynorman
+0 -0
I plan to have someone kick a man's ass at my wedding, you know, sort of as a before-the-reception show on the dance floor.
...actually, Roast Beef's wedding looks like it's going to have just bucketfuls of violence.
I plan to have someone kick a man's ass at my wedding, you know, sort of as a before-the-reception show on the dance floor.
...actually, Roast Beef's wedding looks like it's going to have just bucketfuls of violence.
kamet
+0 -0
I hope Ramses beats the ever-loving crap out of that wascally, no-account, roust-about Showbiz.
This post brought to you by the hyphen.
I hope Ramses beats the ever-loving crap out of that wascally, no-account, roust-about Showbiz.
This post brought to you by the hyphen.
pogo
+1 -0
Son, ah say, SON, ahm about to give you a lesson in whoop-ass that will knock your silly litle pony tail off. (Foghorn Leghorn as Ramses.)
Son, ah say, SON, ahm about to give you a lesson in whoop-ass that will knock your silly litle pony tail off. (Foghorn Leghorn as Ramses.)
heccibiggs
+0 -0
For a second I thought you said "hymen".
That would have been neat.
For a second I thought you said "hymen".
That would have been neat.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
slightly see-through, disconnected from it's home, having a raging distaste for phallic objects in all it's posts.
"you're such a COCK!"
oh and if you're wondering what a hymen actually looks like, google image search turns up Hymen Holocaust as the name of an album which is just the most hilarious thing ever.
slightly see-through, disconnected from it's home, having a raging distaste for phallic objects in all it's posts.
"you're such a COCK!"
oh and if you're wondering what a hymen actually looks like, google image search turns up Hymen Holocaust as the name of an album which is just the most hilarious thing ever.
mo_rose
+0 -1
AWWW HELL YEAH! I am officially psyched.
AWWW HELL YEAH! I am officially psyched.
sncether
+1 -0
Of course he demands the dough hook. Nothing is more old school than baking your own damn staff of life!
And if you use a high-end appliance from Crate & Barrel to do it, well then, you've got a hand free for applying a nice dusting of powdered sugar, or beating into submission whatever animal will soon reside between two slices of fresh-baked bread. If you can't put down a Hereford with one well placed blow, then you don't even deserve to be in the kitchen.
Of course he demands the dough hook. Nothing is more old school than baking your own damn staff of life!
And if you use a high-end appliance from Crate & Barrel to do it, well then, you've got a hand free for applying a nice dusting of powdered sugar, or beating into submission whatever animal will soon reside between two slices of fresh-baked bread. If you can't put down a Hereford with one well placed blow, then you don't even deserve to be in the kitchen.
billylk
+0 -0
Badass.
Badass.
nhennies
+1 -0
Ramses Luther is a he-finds-you kinda guy.
Ramses Luther is a he-finds-you kinda guy.
chuvak
+0 -0
Nah, he's the he-finds-the-dough-hook kind of guy.
Nah, he's the he-finds-the-dough-hook kind of guy.
comrade_tom
+6 -0
the dough hook is incidentally a name for one of his signature moves.
the dough hook is incidentally a name for one of his signature moves.
i_love_kate
+2 -0
Where he punches a fat guy in the stomach really, really hard.
Where he punches a fat guy in the stomach really, really hard.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
photoshop of this forthcoming.
photoshop of this forthcoming.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
i've done it...i just can't find any image servers that'll let me upload a 3.5 meg file.
boo.
i've done it...i just can't find any image servers that'll let me upload a 3.5 meg file.
boo.
cpnglxynchos
+47 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
pogo
+1 -0
May I bestow your first of what I hope are many chubs, my artistic friend.
May I bestow your first of what I hope are many chubs, my artistic friend.
_
+0 -1
iz there a special cheet code if you presses ityou can gun rep a hotter?
iz there a special cheet code if you presses ityou can gun rep a hotter?
orvel
+0 -0
I am out of chubbies. A loss, indeed.
I am out of chubbies. A loss, indeed.
hellofditties
+0 -0
Well done sir!
Well done sir!
thorfinn
+0 -0
It sucks when you go to give someone a chubby, but accidentally chubby the next comment down, only to realize that you have used up your chubbies for the day and are now unable to chubby the post you wanted to post in the first place. That is what happened here, cpnglxynchos, so you can imagine pogo's lone chubby as yours as I give you this v-chub.
It sucks when you go to give someone a chubby, but accidentally chubby the next comment down, only to realize that you have used up your chubbies for the day and are now unable to chubby the post you wanted to post in the first place. That is what happened here, cpnglxynchos, so you can imagine pogo's lone chubby as yours as I give you this v-chub.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
When we get around to a Facebook group for Assetbarristas, we need to name it "Pogo's Lonely Chubby"
When we get around to a Facebook group for Assetbarristas, we need to name it "Pogo's Lonely Chubby"
loneal
+0 -0
Oh jeez, this is embarrassing. No one told you about the Facebook group that already exists? I'm sure it wasn't because they didn't want to hang out with you. They probably just forgot! Don't feel bad.
Oh jeez, this is embarrassing. No one told you about the Facebook group that already exists? I'm sure it wasn't because they didn't want to hang out with you. They probably just forgot! Don't feel bad.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
If it's the one I'm thinking of, I got kicked out. Which is bullshit, because I had absolutely no way of knowing that guy was 8. He was fucking asking for it
If it's the one I'm thinking of, I got kicked out. Which is bullshit, because I had absolutely no way of knowing that guy was 8. He was fucking asking for it
hamscout
+0 -0
oh terrible!
oh terrible!
pogo
+1 -0
Hahaha. But seriously, folks, fear not -- my chub has a nice axe wound to live in.
Hahaha. But seriously, folks, fear not -- my chub has a nice axe wound to live in.
morypcaina
+0 -0
HOLY SHIT
HOLY SHIT
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Loving the load-screen. Nice detail. This rules pretty hard.
V-Chub.
Loving the load-screen. Nice detail. This rules pretty hard.
V-Chub.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
"A Story About Load Screens"
once upon attending a wedding at a hotel when i was eight, me and my buddiy who was also there went to the arcade and i thought it would be cool to rebel to turn off Cruisin' USA for a second to show i was awesome.
when i flipped the switch back a huge "FWOOOP" sound occurred so i scrambled out from the hinder area as fast as my legs would carry me and thus i witnessed an awesome secret that nobody would typically see; the load screen that i would later learn was basically for an N64.
//end
"A Story About Load Screens"
once upon attending a wedding at a hotel when i was eight, me and my buddiy who was also there went to the arcade and i thought it would be cool to rebel to turn off Cruisin' USA for a second to show i was awesome.
when i flipped the switch back a huge "FWOOOP" sound occurred so i scrambled out from the hinder area as fast as my legs would carry me and thus i witnessed an awesome secret that nobody would typically see; the load screen that i would later learn was basically for an N64.
//end
raysdangnachos
+0 -0
If I could have made it through the Florida section with any left, I would be chubbying the hell out of this.
If I could have made it through the Florida section with any left, I would be chubbying the hell out of this.
wonelove
+1 -0
I have spent many a quarter vainly trying to beat him to the punch.
Now I think...what was I thinking?
I have spent many a quarter vainly trying to beat him to the punch.
Now I think...what was I thinking?
jonno
+0 -0
Nevermind.
Nevermind.
bakerton
+0 -0
Now he just has to vote
Now he just has to vote
keir
+0 -0
I have hell of high hopes for this arc after seeing that silhouette. My hopes as it were are high as the Dickens
I have hell of high hopes for this arc after seeing that silhouette. My hopes as it were are high as the Dickens
phy
+0 -0
5'ed, who am I to fight against the tide?
5'ed, who am I to fight against the tide?
cullers
+0 -0
I feel that Ramses Luther Smuckles would not be purchasing an item from Crate and Barrel given that Beef is registered at Macy's. While Crate and Barrel is higher end than Macy's going against the registry is something an upstanding and overtly violent man such as Mr. Smuckles (is it Mr.? or does he have a knighthood or some minor title in another country acquired on his travels that we have yet to hear about) would NOT do.
It%u2019s just freaking impolite.
I feel that Ramses Luther Smuckles would not be purchasing an item from Crate and Barrel given that Beef is registered at Macy's. While Crate and Barrel is higher end than Macy's going against the registry is something an upstanding and overtly violent man such as Mr. Smuckles (is it Mr.? or does he have a knighthood or some minor title in another country acquired on his travels that we have yet to hear about) would NOT do.
It%u2019s just freaking impolite.
sncether
+0 -0
I don't think he's the type of fella who's aware of things like "registries". The man likes bread. He likes machines that serve their purpose unflinchingly. He likes things that are stirred. What, you don't like bread?
I don't think he's the type of fella who's aware of things like "registries". The man likes bread. He likes machines that serve their purpose unflinchingly. He likes things that are stirred. What, you don't like bread?
spinynorman
+0 -0
How can you mail an invitation to a drifting asskicker, coasting from town to town, leaving shame and served up asses in his wake? He wouldn't know about the Macy's.
How can you mail an invitation to a drifting asskicker, coasting from town to town, leaving shame and served up asses in his wake? He wouldn't know about the Macy's.
sharpdresseddan
+0 -0
I think that it is more likely that Ramses was simply drifting in the general direction of California when word of Beef's wedding was passed to him by various contacts. His self-invitation is a whim of his. And it will not be denied.
I think that it is more likely that Ramses was simply drifting in the general direction of California when word of Beef's wedding was passed to him by various contacts. His self-invitation is a whim of his. And it will not be denied.
kamet
+1 -0
For a second there, I thought it was Nitelife.. and I was equally as excited.
For a second there, I thought it was Nitelife.. and I was equally as excited.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
I thought that from the silhouette as well, then remembered all the ass beatings.
I thought that from the silhouette as well, then remembered all the ass beatings.
lokier
+1 -0
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggling with excitement!
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggling with excitement!
hellofditties
+0 -0
There is an apparent lack of neck in this strip.
There is an apparent lack of neck in this strip.
sncether
+0 -0
The androgyne at Crate & Barrel has enough neck for everybody.
The androgyne at Crate & Barrel has enough neck for everybody.
hellofditties
+0 -0
I'll have to take your word for that.
I'll have to take your word for that.
desert_donkey
+1 -0
i wear a hot just like Ramses Luther to work. nobody fucks with me. nobody even looks at me.
old school straw hats just fuck with the modern SoCal-ers. they simply don't get it. fuck 'em.
i wear a hot just like Ramses Luther to work. nobody fucks with me. nobody even looks at me.
old school straw hats just fuck with the modern SoCal-ers. they simply don't get it. fuck 'em.
pogo
+0 -0
Maybe if you tried a hat instead?
Maybe if you tried a hat instead?
kickstart
+0 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
hamscout
+0 -0
hot ass!
hot ass!
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
he's just being an asshat.
he's just being an asshat.
irondave
+0 -0
I read "temperature" as "temperance" the first time through. Try it, it's just as funny! It may be a sign that I care too much about beer.
I read "temperature" as "temperance" the first time through. Try it, it's just as funny! It may be a sign that I care too much about beer.
octafish
+0 -0
You just reminded me of my family Christmases. Every year my father would stand and hold his wine up and make his traditional Christmas toast, "To temperance".
You just reminded me of my family Christmases. Every year my father would stand and hold his wine up and make his traditional Christmas toast, "To temperance".
desert_donkey
+0 -0
that sign shows up on your credit card bill every month. it's a $ sign with a lot of #'s left of the decimal point.
that sign shows up on your credit card bill every month. it's a $ sign with a lot of #'s left of the decimal point.
rumblefish
+0 -0
Roastbeef is totally going to get shot again isn't he?
Roastbeef is totally going to get shot again isn't he?
hellofditties
+0 -0
I will tell you when I see the roller skate but by then it will be too late.
I will tell you when I see the roller skate but by then it will be too late.
gladi8orrex
+0 -2
you rimed! lol you rimed!
you rimed! lol you rimed!
hedonismbot
+1 -0
She's quite a talented rimer, I'll say
She's quite a talented rimer, I'll say
hellofditties
+0 -0
Oh Gladi8orrex, you gladden my heart.
Oh Gladi8orrex, you gladden my heart.
edwell
+2 -0
That's not what your heart is saying.
That's not what your heart is saying.
chagment
+0 -0
I do love Achewood.
But as a Floridian and Honda Civic driver, I can't help but feel I am unwanted here.
I understand that is like the intersection of trashy, tastelessness (in popular perception anyway) and emasculated practicality, and the opposite of what these characters value, but still, it hurts.
I do love Achewood.
But as a Floridian and Honda Civic driver, I can't help but feel I am unwanted here.
I understand that is like the intersection of trashy, tastelessness (in popular perception anyway) and emasculated practicality, and the opposite of what these characters value, but still, it hurts.
quantumcasaba
+0 -0
Do you like the Cure?
Do you like the Cure?
johnmatrix
+0 -0
A friend of mine made a good point. He said that he'd think it'd be interesting if Phillipe's mom came to town and was also in the police blotter, but the inverse of what we've been seeing. Like reports of a middle-aged female otter being swindled and robbed repeatedly. An example he thought of was the police blotter reporting that a middle-aged female otter reported her car missing after she loaned it to a stranger and he didn't return for three hours.
A friend of mine made a good point. He said that he'd think it'd be interesting if Phillipe's mom came to town and was also in the police blotter, but the inverse of what we've been seeing. Like reports of a middle-aged female otter being swindled and robbed repeatedly. An example he thought of was the police blotter reporting that a middle-aged female otter reported her car missing after she loaned it to a stranger and he didn't return for three hours.
johnmatrix
+1 -0
"A middle-aged female otter was found unconscious on a sidewalk in downtown Achewood. When revived by paramedics, the otter reported she saw a man spit on the sidewalk, and when she adomnished him, he responded with 'dreadful cusses,' causing her to faint."
"A middle-aged female otter was found unconscious on a sidewalk in downtown Achewood. When revived by paramedics, the otter reported she saw a man spit on the sidewalk, and when she adomnished him, he responded with 'dreadful cusses,' causing her to faint."
hedonismbot
+0 -0
"When she hit the ground, she received a tremendous head wound. Her skull was fractured, and paramedics took almost a half hour to stop the bleeding. Standard ambulances were all out helping victims of the recent mysterious beatdown, so a bunny-ambulance was borrowed from the nearby rabbit underground. The bunnies were happy to help, but became furious when they found out the otter had got hot blood everywhere, some even inside the hare."
Thank you and goodnight.
"When she hit the ground, she received a tremendous head wound. Her skull was fractured, and paramedics took almost a half hour to stop the bleeding. Standard ambulances were all out helping victims of the recent mysterious beatdown, so a bunny-ambulance was borrowed from the nearby rabbit underground. The bunnies were happy to help, but became furious when they found out the otter had got hot blood everywhere, some even inside the hare."
Thank you and goodnight.
tekende
+0 -1
*ahem*
Not the hare!
*ahem*
Not the hare!
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Worth it. I don't care what any of you say
Worth it. I don't care what any of you say
gladi8orrex
+0 -1
"and middle-aggedgirl femmall otter was brudilly gong rapped in de and alley way an striped of er close. she dieded later in de ostipal form trauma 2 deh darrier"
you make me sad
"and middle-agged
you make me sad
hedonismbot
+1 -0
Oh God if only someone had thrown a basketball at her assaulters
Oh God if only someone had thrown a basketball at her assaulters
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Don't you mean a baseball?
Don't you mean a baseball?
doc_rostov
+5 -0
No, it's a bassball.
[IMGS OFF]
No, it's a bassball.
[IMGS OFF]
gladi8orrex
+0 -2
lol a bass ball would anly werk if her the rapin' criminals were balck... wait, lol, black criminal is redentant. lol
lol a bass ball would anly werk if her the rapin' criminals were balck... wait, lol, black criminal is redentant. lol
_
+0 -1
gladi8orrex, my best friend is a criminal! Not nice, not funny, not cool.
gladi8orrex, my best friend is a criminal! Not nice, not funny, not cool.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Because all criminals are black?
Because all criminals are black?
hedonismbot
+1 -0
God that is such a racist thing to imply. All blacks ARE criminals, but there are so many criminals that aren't black. You sicken me.
God that is such a racist thing to imply. All blacks ARE criminals, but there are so many criminals that aren't black. You sicken me.
pogo
+0 -0
Correction, it all black MALES who are criminals.
Correction, it all black MALES who are criminals.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
I'm guessing you don't visit many prostitutes
I'm guessing you don't visit many prostitutes
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Of course he does. They're just all asian.
Of course he does. They're just all asian.
pogo
+0 -0
Ain't that a victimless crime?
Ain't that a victimless crime?
cromar
+0 -0
Racist humor is fucking crap.
Racist humor is fucking crap.
lexsenthur
+0 -0
As of 345 votes, this comic is rated higher than "Ray gets sort of stoned"
Hell of fives, yo.
As of 345 votes, this comic is rated higher than "Ray gets sort of stoned"
Hell of fives, yo.
slanger
+0 -0
I like how the police blotter seems to be in real time.
I like how the police blotter seems to be in real time.
nhennies
+2 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
kickstart
+0 -0
growing up we had the Kitchenaid mixer but Mom never made anything that required the hook. It was SO frustrating. I wanted to see what it could do.
growing up we had the Kitchenaid mixer but Mom never made anything that required the hook. It was SO frustrating. I wanted to see what it could do.
squares
+0 -0
it can knead the hell outta some dough.
it can knead the hell outta some dough.
autrepoupee
+3 -0
aw man you were missing out, one time I made scones in like 6 minutes using that hook
SIX MINUTE SCONES DAMNIT ONLY SIX MINUTES 'TIL SCONETIME
aw man you were missing out, one time I made scones in like 6 minutes using that hook
SIX MINUTE SCONES DAMNIT ONLY SIX MINUTES 'TIL SCONETIME
rowboat
+0 -0
This is an unbelievably short amount of time to wait for scones.
This is an unbelievably short amount of time to wait for scones.
thorfinn
+0 -0
The dough hook doesn't do anything really special, I've made cookie dough with it a few times, but that's about it. Be extremely careful if you ever get the pasta maker attachment I made the dough exactly to their recommendations, and tried to run it through the pasta maker, and it wouldn't go through, so I started pushing it through with the little stick that comes with the attachment. This caused the screw mechanism that pushes the dough through to stop turning, and the tab that holds the attachments broke off, causing the pastamaker to spin around wildly throwing pasta dough around the kitchen. My mom then got the idea to grab the pasta maker attachment to stop it from spinning, and since it could not spin the attachment or the parts inside, the mixer flipped over, smashed the butter dish, and cracked the counter. So, if you ever get the Kitchenaid pasta maker attachment, put more water in the dough than the recipe recommends, or you risk destroying your kitchen.
The dough hook doesn't do anything really special, I've made cookie dough with it a few times, but that's about it. Be extremely careful if you ever get the pasta maker attachment I made the dough exactly to their recommendations, and tried to run it through the pasta maker, and it wouldn't go through, so I started pushing it through with the little stick that comes with the attachment. This caused the screw mechanism that pushes the dough through to stop turning, and the tab that holds the attachments broke off, causing the pastamaker to spin around wildly throwing pasta dough around the kitchen. My mom then got the idea to grab the pasta maker attachment to stop it from spinning, and since it could not spin the attachment or the parts inside, the mixer flipped over, smashed the butter dish, and cracked the counter. So, if you ever get the Kitchenaid pasta maker attachment, put more water in the dough than the recipe recommends, or you risk destroying your kitchen.
sncether
+0 -0
Can you come over to my house some time and make dinner? Would you mind pretending someone else is your mother while you're doing it? It might even be Wanda Sykes!
Thanks,
sncether
VP of New Programming
UPN Network
Can you come over to my house some time and make dinner? Would you mind pretending someone else is your mother while you're doing it? It might even be Wanda Sykes!
Thanks,
sncether
VP of New Programming
UPN Network
tetsujin
+0 -0
Ah, Kitchenaid... What wedding gift registry would be complete without the ultimate middle-class kitchen trophy?
(It is a damn good mixer, though... It's pretty, but it's not only pretty...)
Ah, Kitchenaid... What wedding gift registry would be complete without the ultimate middle-class kitchen trophy?
(It is a damn good mixer, though... It's pretty, but it's not only pretty...)
i_love_kate
+0 -0
I find it incongruous that a minor... even background character here has been given a full illustration. That rarely ever happens. Look at a recent instance, the air stewardess. Never really shown at all.
Could this Crate and Barrel assistant have a greater future than we expect?
I find it incongruous that a minor... even background character here has been given a full illustration. That rarely ever happens. Look at a recent instance, the air stewardess. Never really shown at all.
Could this Crate and Barrel assistant have a greater future than we expect?
i_love_kate
+1 -0
On the other hand, the two policemen in the Boffin arc were drawn.
Hold you fire, folks, it's just another unscreened theory.
On the other hand, the two policemen in the Boffin arc were drawn.
Hold you fire, folks, it's just another unscreened theory.
envika
+0 -0
I thought Ramses never fought in front of a woman...
I thought Ramses never fought in front of a woman...
darkernorm
+2 -0
The Man With Blood on his Hands had better wipe it off before he greets the bride.
The Man With Blood on his Hands had better wipe it off before he greets the bride.
professorhazard
+0 -0
Q. What if this all ends with Molly being such a hard-nose that she forces a smile of fighter's recognition out of Ramses Luthor?
A. "The Wedding" will become known as the second epic storyling after "The Great Outdoor Fight", its future as a hardcover assured.
Q. What if this all ends with Molly being such a hard-nose that she forces a smile of fighter's recognition out of Ramses Luthor?
A. "The Wedding" will become known as the second epic storyling after "The Great Outdoor Fight", its future as a hardcover assured.
deovalente
+0 -0
This is the beginning of a fantastic storyline.
This is the beginning of a fantastic storyline.
massialot
+0 -0
Oh shit, is The Man With The Blood On His Hands gonna make bread? That is COMPLETELY RAW!
Oh shit, is The Man With The Blood On His Hands gonna make bread? That is COMPLETELY RAW!
miseryandthesun
+0 -0
Showdown between Cornelius and Ramses.
Please.
Showdown between Cornelius and Ramses.
Please.
nbgreene
+0 -0
crate and barrel chick is pretty hot
crate and barrel chick is pretty hot
hedonismbot
+0 -0
YIFF IN HELL
YIFF IN HELL
kickstart
+2 -0
yeah, seriously. stick to the brownish areas, with points.
yeah, seriously. stick to the brownish areas, with points.
pogo
+0 -0
You sure that's a chick?
You sure that's a chick?
autrepoupee
+0 -0
i mean, if you're going to go that route, at least make it Gadget from Rescue Rangers or something.
i mean, if you're going to go that route, at least make it Gadget from Rescue Rangers or something.
professorhazard
+0 -0
Are you certain that that is what you want, autrepoupee?
Are you certain that that is what you want, autrepoupee?
autrepoupee
+3 -0
i've made a huge mistake
[IMGS OFF]
forgive me, father
i've made a huge mistake
[IMGS OFF]
forgive me, father
hedonismbot
+0 -0
God damn you all! Fucking yiffing bastard furries... Buttlicking little mongrel s h i t h e a d
motherless
IN FUCKING STAIRWELLS!
God damn you all! Fucking yiffing bastard furries... Buttlicking little mongrel s h i t h e a d
motherless
IN FUCKING STAIRWELLS!
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Fucking furries... Where's my motherfucking Diovan. God damnit what the HELL is wrong with you people! Riding on your nasty ass furry boat, with your nasty ass furry friends. Oh fuck my fucking chest. God damnit, do you people have any idea how much volume I do?
Fucking furries... Where's my motherfucking Diovan. God damnit what the HELL is wrong with you people! Riding on your nasty ass furry boat, with your nasty ass furry friends. Oh fuck my fucking chest. God damnit, do you people have any idea how much volume I do?
kickstart
+0 -0
I sort of want to die, a little bit. But you worked in an AD reference, so good on ya.
I sort of want to die, a little bit. But you worked in an AD reference, so good on ya.
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
CAT TITS
CAT TITS
CAT TITS
CAAAAAAATTTTTTT TITYS
CAT TITS
CAT TITS
CAT TITS
CAAAAAAATTTTTTT TITYS
pogo
+0 -0
That's "titties," according to the Itty Bitty Tittie Club.
That's "titties," according to the Itty Bitty Tittie Club.
pogo
+0 -0
Correction: Itty Bitty Tittie Committee
Correction: Itty Bitty Tittie Committee
farqussus
+0 -0
there should be four more
there should be four more
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Fuck this looks like the stripper that straddles Connie in one of the more recent strips.
Fuck this looks like the stripper that straddles Connie in one of the more recent strips.
boheeka
+0 -0
you evil sonofabitch I had no idea where that was going to send me. that just ruined my mind you asshole.
you evil sonofabitch I had no idea where that was going to send me. that just ruined my mind you asshole.
checkmatejones
+1 -0
Best Man: Ray Smuckles
Man With the Blood On His Hands: Ramses Luther Smuckles
Best Man: Ray Smuckles
Man With the Blood On His Hands: Ramses Luther Smuckles
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
basically, yes.
basically, yes.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
which one of you FUCKS gave this a four? this was almost the only almost 5 star strips!
which one of you FUCKS gave this a four? this was almost the only almost 5 star strips!
lawbot
+0 -0
I gave it a three. Average.
I gave it a three. Average.
edwell
+1 -0
Achewood on Twitter
Is this for real? Did I miss an announcement on the site or the blogs? Am I the last to know about it?
Achewood on Twitter
Is this for real? Did I miss an announcement on the site or the blogs? Am I the last to know about it?
_
+0 -1
twitters?ithoughtthisthatwastwitters?
twitters?ithoughtthisthatwastwitters?
professorhazard
+0 -0
I almost got a Twitter, but when I learned that I couldn't send it pictures from my cell phone, I got a Blogger instead.
As for its legitimacy/secrecy, it could be that Chis Onstead is waiting to see how much he likes it before publicizing it.
I almost got a Twitter, but when I learned that I couldn't send it pictures from my cell phone, I got a Blogger instead.
As for its legitimacy/secrecy, it could be that Chis Onstead is waiting to see how much he likes it before publicizing it.
_
+0 -0
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, Edwell, KaMeT, loneal, echidnaboy)
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, Edwell, KaMeT, loneal, echidnaboy)
_
+0 -0
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by yearsinhotclaws, Stereo, lawbot, KaMeT, turnabout)
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by yearsinhotclaws, Stereo, lawbot, KaMeT, turnabout)
_
+0 -0
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by yearsinhotclaws, lawbot, KaMeT)
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by yearsinhotclaws, lawbot, KaMeT)
loneal
+0 -0
Do not go into a mania. I do not want to be responsible for the killing spree of an Internet stranger. I will *ignore user* you and never lame you again. Is that cool?
Do not go into a mania. I do not want to be responsible for the killing spree of an Internet stranger. I will *ignore user* you and never lame you again. Is that cool?
_
+0 -0
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, KaMeT, Doc_Rostov, I_Love_Kate, thegoblins)
A comment left by _ was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by lawbot, KaMeT, Doc_Rostov, I_Love_Kate, thegoblins)
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Lamed for the the use of "cunt" as a verb.
This is a rare occurence for me.
Lamed for the the use of "cunt" as a verb.
This is a rare occurence for me.
gormster
+0 -0
rest assured i would lame you if i could
rest assured i would lame you if i could
bixschmix
+0 -0
As would I, my friend. As would I.
As would I, my friend. As would I.
butta
+0 -0
Oh dear God he's back. Booya.
Oh dear God he's back. Booya.
jimjams
+0 -0
I thought it'd turn out to be Tina doin' the beatin'
I thought it'd turn out to be Tina doin' the beatin'
atticusonline
+0 -0
OH...MY...GOD
I can feel the beginning of an awesome arc.
OH...MY...GOD
I can feel the beginning of an awesome arc.
yearsinhotclaws
+0 -0
Your avatar looks like philippe has achieved total consciousness.
Your avatar looks like philippe has achieved total consciousness.
hamscout
+0 -0
Or he has been turned into a novelty vibrator!
HERE COMES A SPECIAL BZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Or he has been turned into a novelty vibrator!
HERE COMES A SPECIAL BZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
gormster
+1 -1
Okay, I'm gonna do my best to write a plus sign. Each new line is a new attempt:
(natural)
\ (backslash)
/ (forwardslash)
+ (hex entity)
+ (decimal entity)
%2B (%-sign entity)
');DROP DATABASE;--
Okay, I'm gonna do my best to write a plus sign. Each new line is a new attempt:
(natural)
\ (backslash)
/ (forwardslash)
+ (hex entity)
+ (decimal entity)
%2B (%-sign entity)
');DROP DATABASE;--
dezufnocosem
+0 -0
| mer?
dezufnocosem
+0 -0
look really close maybe its there |
look really close maybe its there
stereo
+0 -0
Jesus died for that character, do not abuse it for your menial mathematical needs .
Jesus died for that character, do not abuse it for your menial mathematical needs .
atticusonline
+0 -0
I'm going to go ahead and say...(Plus)
I'm going to go ahead and say...(Plus)
rad-chillies
+0 -0
HOT FUCKING SHIT WE KNOW WHO THIS IS
HOT FUCKING SHIT WE KNOW WHO THIS IS
newwavepony
+0 -0
"hot fucking shit" is a really good swear
"hot fucking shit" is a really good swear
boheeka
+0 -0
I really dig Ramses' hat, but I'm afraid to tell him.
He might kill me.
I really dig Ramses' hat, but I'm afraid to tell him.
He might kill me.
hedonismbot
+3 -0
You want a real adventure? Tell him his thighs are rockin
You want a real adventure? Tell him his thighs are rockin
boheeka
+0 -0
I'll give you the chubby.
Ramses, I really dig your thighs...
I'll give you the chubby.
Ramses, I really dig your thighs...
davey-boy
+0 -0
I love how Ramses can go around kicking people's asses in a way that sort of makes sense to people.
I love how Ramses can go around kicking people's asses in a way that sort of makes sense to people.
hypoluxa
+0 -0
Being "found severely beaten behind Chili's" will surely humble a man.
Being "found severely beaten behind Chili's" will surely humble a man.
susurrus
+3 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
thats something thats not very common, or entertaining around here. cosmetic surgeon advertisements.
thats something thats not very common, or entertaining around here. cosmetic surgeon advertisements.
A comment left by jttuba was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, possums, ppccd, riotdejaneiro, waddie, Thorfinn, hexirex21, Deusoma, SSDDR, flazisismuss, StagnantDisplay, dullard, _cheesekayke, NDCaesar, Conn, MortisInvictus, luckypyjamas, ketamind, aesop_punk, usversusthem, Doc_Rostov, turnabout, motts, Irien, morbo)
Rod and The Correct Answer both rock peoples cans in different ways.
Not to be a pedant, but Rod Huggins may only have his can rocked.
Are you saying such a man of gravity may have difficulty with "delivery"?
He's saying Rod Huggins prefers to play the lady's role, friend.
Jesus, don't mention gender roles here! Have you seen the sorts of 'discussions' that crap out over terms like that?
Ahhh... I didn't realise this... Lawbot, I give myself a hearty NO. Still, surely he can decide to "swing the other way" at will?
I don't know. I have a gay friend who will rock other peoples' cans, but he will not enjoy it or get off. It's just something he feels like he has to do to help others get off sometimes.
I'm sure it works all kinds of ways just like straight sexuality.
I take it we're dealing with Mingus here. For the record, first time I've got to this strip or those following... so... y'know.
Nope. I was wrong. Very wrong.
Cats in hats are confusing at that.
How could you think it was Nightlife? Has he ever beaten dudes raw? Guy smokes pot constantly, and pot-heads are the least combative motherfuckers on the planet. If I was high right now, I probably wouldn't even be typing this, because it harsh my groove.
*would. It would harsh my groove.
Damn. And I'm completely sober, making this mistake even more embarrassing.
There is a crucial difference between severely beating an entire basketball team, and severely beating off an entire basketball team.
amirite theirateturk?
This is the kind of advice I wish I was given in my youth. It's the kind of advice that can save you a lot of years.
Huge slam on theirateturk's ex-girlfriend out of nowhere.
Ahem.
I game her a huge slam last night. But not out of nowhere. I took her out to dinner and a show beforehand, and we set down clear boundaries regarding what was, and what was not sexually agreed upon.
gaVe her a huge slam. Didn't game that slam one bit. Would it be so fuking hard to add a syntax analyzer here? Just assume a standard context and run with it. Fucking technology.
I'm going to take theirateturk's ex-girlfriend out for a nice seafood dinner, and then never call her again.
DOROTHY MANTOOTH IS A SAINT! A SAINT!
There were horses, and a man on fire , and I killed a guy with a trident.
A comment left by orvel was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, bigtom, sigmacoder, RogueCheddar, Doc_Rostov)
A comment left by thorfinn was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by pwb, ______, Satyr)
Right ear.. or left ear? (in response to Thorfinn incase nesting is fucked over)
Quoting Will Ferrell movies ad nauseum does not make you funny. I believe it makes you an American frat guy.
My attempt to illustrate just how lame over-quoting Will Ferrell is by leaving an equally lame comment seems to have been met with the expected response.
Also, I LOVE LAMP.
MOIST!
DICKINGS
AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!
MOTHS?!? WHERE?!?
...or was it a cockroach?
You should find yourself a safe house, or a relative close by.
fucking, even.
: (
My only fault was loving her too much : (
You loved her with both hands
AND MY AXE.
You guys lied, that didn't feel good at all.
It felt so good the first time.
You have my axe.
Nah, it still feels good.
I can understand how the insatiable lust for a dough hook would confuse you.
Take a look at Rod Huggins and tell me that's a man who hasn't dreamt of baking his own churros.
I would kill puppies for a dough hook attachment. My kitchenaid is bare without one.
I'd like to see your bare kitchenaid. Ooohh-la-la!
are you fucking kidding me
To be fair, his pseudonym is Rodney.
To be even fairer, he was definitely kidding.
Tall and lean
Sharp and clean
With him there's no inbetween
It's-
Ramses...
Luther...
SMUCKLES!
I appreciate this, I really do, but I would have preferred it a bit more Michael Buffer style
Rrrramses!
Lllluther!
Smmuuuuuuuuuuuckles!
If it helps, just think of the intros for Rowdy Roddy Piper from the eighties.
Great. Now I'm gay. Thanks.
Everyone's gay for Rowdy Roddy Piper.
That's true. Even the most macho of dudes had a period in his life where he carried around a pack of Bazooka Joe, just in case .
oh no...
... I'm all outta gum.
Oh gosh imagine Ramses Luther Smuckles fighting Garret Jax, oh lalala!
Tony M. Nyphot's Flying Risccu!