gmagnido
+8 -0
I woulda shit myself when I read this, but then I'da had to name to maneuver.
I woulda shit myself when I read this, but then I'da had to name to maneuver.
gmagnido
+3 -0
"the" maneuver. the. i'm an idiot.
"the" maneuver. the. i'm an idiot.
dorothypoopbot
+5 -0
The Runny Jester? The Brown Joke?
The Runny Jester? The Brown Joke?
turnabout
+10 -0
Is Ray_and_Beef_Chat Beef's most sophisticated piece of software? It seems more complex than hash browns and spare change.
Is Ray_and_Beef_Chat Beef's most sophisticated piece of software? It seems more complex than hash browns and spare change.
omegatron
+4 -0
The standard IM programs did not specify time with enough precision.
The standard IM programs did not specify time with enough precision.
madnes
+1 -2
I must know what the Blumpkin is.
I must know what the Blumpkin is.
imitationcrab
+0 -0
A comment left by imitationcrab was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by kylank, SSDDR, STUART)
A comment left by imitationcrab was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by kylank, SSDDR, STUART)
hollis
+14 -1
Yeah, supposedly, but this is one of many things that I suspect Urbandictionary.com just made up. Nobody had actually performed a blumpkin before the site went up, and now people all over are going "eww... people actually do that?" Blumpkins: the new alligators in the sewers.
Yeah, supposedly, but this is one of many things that I suspect Urbandictionary.com just made up. Nobody had actually performed a blumpkin before the site went up, and now people all over are going "eww... people actually do that?" Blumpkins: the new alligators in the sewers.
cdl146
+4 -0
I have a friend who claims to have received one. Given the caliber of "women" he brings around, I'm inclined to believe him.
I have a friend who claims to have received one. Given the caliber of "women" he brings around, I'm inclined to believe him.
spinynorman
+24 -0
I have a friend who insisted he had received one several times. He was from the ghettos of Boston. He claimed the key was that you had to drop "small bombs."
Until he filled me in on the definition I always assumed "Blumpkin" was the name of the mayor of some children show's fictional village.
I have a friend who insisted he had received one several times. He was from the ghettos of Boston. He claimed the key was that you had to drop "small bombs."
Until he filled me in on the definition I always assumed "Blumpkin" was the name of the mayor of some children show's fictional village.
rykan
+1 -0
I would never do this. I don;t care how much booze you plied with me.
Normally? Yeah, that's fine! On the can? THE CAN??
I would never do this. I don;t care how much booze you plied with me.
Normally? Yeah, that's fine! On the can? THE CAN??
nlaw
+0 -2
Would the head giver also receive some golden mouth wash?
Would the head giver also receive some golden mouth wash?
gormster
+2 -0
actually it was a howard stern invention
actually it was a howard stern invention
intergalactic_
+0 -0
Really? I'd always heard it was Gene Simmons.
Really? I'd always heard it was Gene Simmons.
deusoma
+0 -0
Tucker Max says he did it once, but I believe very little of what that guy writes anyway.
Tucker Max says he did it once, but I believe very little of what that guy writes anyway.
gkiyo
+7 -0
Heh. Tucker Max is an asinine man.
Heh. Tucker Max is an asinine man.
apocowarg
+7 -0
Tucker Max is dogshit, man. Mega-nasty.
Tucker Max is dogshit, man. Mega-nasty.
theplaidknight
+0 -0
The fact that such a person could exist says much about the country that we live in. Much that is bad. Even so, his stories are extremely entertaining.
The fact that such a person could exist says much about the country that we live in. Much that is bad. Even so, his stories are extremely entertaining.
invidious
+0 -0
Tucker Max was basically "Entourage" before "Entourage" became a TV show.
Tucker Max was basically "Entourage" before "Entourage" became a TV show.
saru
+0 -0
Man, the original text list of retarded, inane "sexual" acts was circulated on _Usenet_
I don't know if the "Dirty Sanchez" existed before then, and I don't want to know.
Man, the original text list of retarded, inane "sexual" acts was circulated on _Usenet_
I don't know if the "Dirty Sanchez" existed before then, and I don't want to know.
achilleselbow
+3 -0
Regarding a lot of things, I wonder if they existed before the internet. I like to think of history prior to the 80's as being in a state of indeterminacy until someone comes up with something gross on the net, at which point it will be the case that said grossness has existed in some way since ancient times.
Regarding a lot of things, I wonder if they existed before the internet. I like to think of history prior to the 80's as being in a state of indeterminacy until someone comes up with something gross on the net, at which point it will be the case that said grossness has existed in some way since ancient times.
mattylite
+2 -0
I don't know about a lot of things, but I know I heard about all these sex acts before the internet. It's not like information couldn't change hands pre-internet, and it's not like the standards were really any higher when it came to stuff like this. Don't get me wrong, I'm not getting nostalgic for those dark ages-- I mean, shit, back then you had to buy porno.
I don't know about a lot of things, but I know I heard about all these sex acts before the internet. It's not like information couldn't change hands pre-internet, and it's not like the standards were really any higher when it came to stuff like this. Don't get me wrong, I'm not getting nostalgic for those dark ages-- I mean, shit, back then you had to buy porno.
kamet
+0 -0
(shudders) Uuugh... buying porno. Those days were not so fun. Going into the store.. quietly asking for your mag of choice, or worse, going specifically to a porn store and getting that suspicious, knowing look out of the corner of the proprietor's eye...
(shudders) Uuugh... buying porno. Those days were not so fun. Going into the store.. quietly asking for your mag of choice, or worse, going specifically to a porn store and getting that suspicious, knowing look out of the corner of the proprietor's eye...
achilleselbow
+1 -0
Nah, way before urban dictionary there was a site called Glossary of Obscure Sexual Terms and I saw Blumpkin on there. Also Arabian Goggles, Rodeo, Houdini, Reverse Houdini, etc.
Nah, way before urban dictionary there was a site called Glossary of Obscure Sexual Terms and I saw Blumpkin on there. Also Arabian Goggles, Rodeo, Houdini, Reverse Houdini, etc.
theyang
+0 -0
Liebot on the job
Liebot on the job
johnnyrocker
+0 -0
Upside-Down Blumpkin (self-explanatory)
Reverse Blumpkin 1 (the girl is giving you head, and she shits.
Reverse Blumpkin 2 (you give the girl head, and you shit.)
Upside-Down Blumpkin (self-explanatory)
Reverse Blumpkin 1 (the girl is giving you head, and she shits.
Reverse Blumpkin 2 (you give the girl head, and you shit.)
cracklewater
+0 -0
The alt-text refers to the third option as a lady-blumpkin just a few strips down the line.
Ottawa Modified Death company
The alt-text refers to the third option as a lady-blumpkin just a few strips down the line.
Ottawa Modified Death company
cracklewater
+1 -0
No, sorry a lady-blumpkin would probably be the fourth, unspoken option - you give the girl head while she shits. Was that was what you meant by the upside-down blumpkin?
Difficult with a human, I'd think, but just nasty and pointless with such as the monotremes mentioned in the alt-text.
Cloacalingus - NOUN. MEANS, EATING A LADY-CHICKEN WITH THE MOUTH
No, sorry a lady-blumpkin would probably be the fourth, unspoken option - you give the girl head while she shits. Was that was what you meant by the upside-down blumpkin?
Difficult with a human, I'd think, but just nasty and pointless with such as the monotremes mentioned in the alt-text.
Cloacalingus - NOUN. MEANS, EATING A LADY-CHICKEN WITH THE MOUTH
aperson
+0 -0
The 'Blumpkin, Ohio' - girl is giving you head while somebody in Boise takes a shit.
The 'Blumpkin, Ohio' - girl is giving you head while somebody in Boise takes a shit.
aperson
+0 -0
Boise, Ohio - my US geography is very good.
Boise, Ohio - my US geography is very good.
aperson
+1 -0
Ohiodaho.
Ohiodaho.
mrcool1122
+7 -0
Minnesota. Pride .
Minnesota. Pride .
yomimono
+0 -0
Wait. I thought your icon was from Columbus, WI. Now I'm confused.
Wait. I thought your icon was from Columbus, WI. Now I'm confused.
sargasm
+12 -0
I love the dollar signs that Ray slips into his instant messenger conversations.
I love the dollar signs that Ray slips into his instant messenger conversations.
rowboat
+4 -1
OK, as awesome as it would be to IM with Ray, he is obviously the most annoying breed of IMer imaginable.
OK, as awesome as it would be to IM with Ray, he is obviously the most annoying breed of IMer imaginable.
lightupafatty
+2 -0
i've started doing this with all text messages i send on my phone. none of my friends have commented on it, but i like to think they acknowledge it with a sigh and a shake of the head when they read the texts.
i've started doing this with all text messages i send on my phone. none of my friends have commented on it, but i like to think they acknowledge it with a sigh and a shake of the head when they read the texts.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
Why would you want that response?
Why would you want that response?
senseihollywood
+0 -0
oh please, someone ask me what a 68 is...
oh please, someone ask me what a 68 is...
catachresis
+2 -0
Oh, go on then.
(I know of the 70: a 69 with one watchin')
Oh, go on then.
(I know of the 70: a 69 with one watchin')
senseihollywood
+19 -0
that's where you do me and I owe you one...
umm, hypothetically speaking of course
that's where you do me and I owe you one...
umm, hypothetically speaking of course
nigelchaos
+3 -0
Like a 77... a 69 but you get 8 more.
Like a 77... a 69 but you get 8 more.
kickstart
+4 -0
It's the "Why was six afraid of seven" for a new generation!
It's the "Why was six afraid of seven" for a new generation!
nurdbot
+1 -0
I love how Beef disgusts Ray, The Classy Master of getting his bone on and not caring if anyone doesn't want to know.
I love how Beef disgusts Ray, The Classy Master of getting his bone on and not caring if anyone doesn't want to know.
1000hz
+3 -0
I gave this strip a 5, which I guess would convert into $$ US Dollars.
I gave this strip a 5, which I guess would convert into $$ US Dollars.
flynn
+16 -0
Beef wrote a chat program specifically for the two of them, of which this is the sixth version. $$
Beef wrote a chat program specifically for the two of them, of which this is the sixth version. $$
nutmeg
+4 -2
why did you think of that though
why would you think of that
why did you think of that though
why would you think of that
morganization
+0 -0
i love that ray is offended
i love that ray is offended
fogwolf
+0 -0
Amazing. One of my favorites.
Amazing. One of my favorites.
mega_panda
+0 -0
A comment left by mega_panda was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by rolotonybrowntown, Deusoma, Lumus, Siah)
A comment left by mega_panda was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by rolotonybrowntown, Deusoma, Lumus, Siah)
trollcollins
+1 -0
But is that sexxxy tho?
Anyway, that would take a urethra of troubling width.
But is that sexxxy tho?
Anyway, that would take a urethra of troubling width.
woodenteeth
+1 -0
nasty. but hilarious. entirely because you felt the need to describe the paper. "irregular". awesome.
nasty. but hilarious. entirely because you felt the need to describe the paper. "irregular". awesome.
tekende
+1 -0
Wait. Do they have sex with the pen still in the urethra? Because if so, I hate you for making me think of that.
Wait. Do they have sex with the pen still in the urethra? Because if so, I hate you for making me think of that.
farqussus
+1 -0
I hate YOU for making me think of that.
I hate YOU for making me think of that.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
Why did you think of that though
Why would you think of that
Why did you think of that though
Why would you think of that
mega_panda
+17 -1
the drunk russian: I get drunk and write comments on websites such as spikedhumor and achewood. I then have sex.
the drunk russian: I get drunk and write comments on websites such as spikedhumor and achewood. I then have sex.
mercuri0us
+0 -0
On vodka
On vodka
straw
+1 -0
This is one of my alltime favorites Ray is so upset
This is one of my alltime favorites Ray is so upset
grayfox
+0 -0
Ray's last two messages make this strip.
Ray's last two messages make this strip.
greenideas
+1 -0
The tragedy of this strip is that we don't get to see Ray's face when he signs off, aghast that Beef thought about this horrible thing.
Also, "blood pudding."
The tragedy of this strip is that we don't get to see Ray's face when he signs off, aghast that Beef thought about this horrible thing.
Also, "blood pudding."
kenton
+13 -0
This was my first Achemoment. The Livid Pedro is so fantastically anticlimactic, and sort of sad, but what makes the strip for me Ray's entirely unaddressed first doubt: "Is that sexxy tho," over which Beef just cold steamrolls.
This was my first Achemoment. The Livid Pedro is so fantastically anticlimactic, and sort of sad, but what makes the strip for me Ray's entirely unaddressed first doubt: "Is that sexxy tho," over which Beef just cold steamrolls.
dolphinboy05
+0 -0
no one would want to see a kitty monroe. it is not a thing anyone wants to see.
no one would want to see a kitty monroe. it is not a thing anyone wants to see.
gumfish
+0 -0
A comment left by gumfish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Mortal, ButterMoths, alphagator, dismas, Eraia)
A comment left by gumfish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Mortal, ButterMoths, alphagator, dismas, Eraia)
gormster
+2 -1
no, it doesn't. in fact, to be on the safe side, I would recommend you never say anything again.
no, it doesn't. in fact, to be on the safe side, I would recommend you never say anything again.
gumfish
+0 -0
A comment left by gumfish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by EM2, dismas, CanusDivinus)
A comment left by gumfish was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by EM2, dismas, CanusDivinus)
mortal
+6 -0
You can have mine.
You can have mine.
kronski
+0 -0
This strip inspired me to code a personal chat program only usable by me and a friend of mine. Or rather, it would have if I made it. And if I had any friends... um, has anyone heard of a Strawberry Shortcake?
This strip inspired me to code a personal chat program only usable by me and a friend of mine. Or rather, it would have if I made it. And if I had any friends... um, has anyone heard of a Strawberry Shortcake?
heyman
+0 -0
ha ha ha ha ha why yes
ha ha ha ha ha why yes
heccibiggs
+0 -0
I'm going to regret this, but...
What is strawberry shortcake? I'm afraid to Google it.
I'm going to regret this, but...
What is strawberry shortcake? I'm afraid to Google it.
heccibiggs
+0 -0
...I tried Googling it and all I got was recipes and children's characters anyway.
...I tried Googling it and all I got was recipes and children's characters anyway.
mattylite
+3 -0
[IMGS OFF]
It was a toy. A doll. A little doll. It smelled like Strawberries. I think there were some other characters who smelled like other stuff. Mostly fruit-related. It was like there was a marketing think-tank, and it was right when scratch-n-sniff stickers were popular, and so they made dolls that smelled like various fruits since that mixed the timeless appeal of dolls and the momentary pleasure of smelling chemical imitations of certain fruits imprinted into plastic. They were for girls.
[IMGS OFF]
It was a toy. A doll. A little doll. It smelled like Strawberries. I think there were some other characters who smelled like other stuff. Mostly fruit-related. It was like there was a marketing think-tank, and it was right when scratch-n-sniff stickers were popular, and so they made dolls that smelled like various fruits since that mixed the timeless appeal of dolls and the momentary pleasure of smelling chemical imitations of certain fruits imprinted into plastic. They were for girls.
i_love_kate
+13 -0
Then you have sex.
Then you have sex.
hendetta
+30 -0
The April Fools- When you are all ready to go with a lady and she is so nude,and then you shout "APRIL FOOLS" and leave.
The April Fools- When you are all ready to go with a lady and she is so nude,and then you shout "APRIL FOOLS" and leave.
greenkoolayd
+0 -0
you dont just tease a lady like that...
you dont just tease a lady like that...
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
it would be one of the hardest moves to do. (well, depending on the hotness of said lady.)
it would be one of the hardest moves to do. (well, depending on the hotness of said lady.)
skiddyfisk
+9 -0
I like how the time indication both uses a 24-hour clock AND indicates AM/PM.
I like how the time indication both uses a 24-hour clock AND indicates AM/PM.
mugi
+0 -0
Oh, nice. I hadn't noticed that.
Oh, nice. I hadn't noticed that.
molesticide
+0 -0
A comment left by molesticide was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by dismas, eatmorekix, rowboat, _cheesekayke, woodenteeth, TTAGXAMM, plusigot125, Siah, captneko, nbray)
A comment left by molesticide was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by dismas, eatmorekix, rowboat, _cheesekayke, woodenteeth, TTAGXAMM, plusigot125, Siah, captneko, nbray)
_cheesekayke
+10 -0
Um, well, you could have avoided using the word "colored."
Um, well, you could have avoided using the word "colored."
gormster
+0 -2
Yeah, that would have helped.
At least spell it right :P (with a u)
Yeah, that would have helped.
At least spell it right :P (with a u)
qwerty
+0 -0
A comment left by qwerty was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Deusoma, dominus101, TTAGXAMM)
A comment left by qwerty was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Deusoma, dominus101, TTAGXAMM)
mercuri0us
+0 -0
Your avatar is in the process of one right now
Your avatar is in the process of one right now
paperboy_2000
+9 -0
The Kukla, Fran, and Ollie: (n) This is when you and the lady finish up and you can only find 3 out of 4 socks afterwards.
The Kukla, Fran, and Ollie: (n) This is when you and the lady finish up and you can only find 3 out of 4 socks afterwards.
mastronaut
+2 -0
The Happy-Birthday-Grandma! (n) When you wait for the woman to be close to climax before you pull out, play the bongos on her titties and yell "happy birthday, grandma!!"
The Happy-Birthday-Grandma! (n) When you wait for the woman to be close to climax before you pull out, play the bongos on her titties and yell "happy birthday, grandma!!"
takepills
+4 -0
is that sexxy tho
is that sexxy tho
thorfinn
+7 -0
The Tony Danza
A modified version of the donkey punch where, when doing it doggy style, you pul out right before climaxing and say "Who's the boss?", followed by slamming it in the backdoor, yelling "Tony Danza", punching the girl in the back of the head.
The Tony Danza
A modified version of the donkey punch where, when doing it doggy style, you pul out right before climaxing and say "Who's the boss?", followed by slamming it in the backdoor, yelling "Tony Danza", punching the girl in the back of the head.
sp1derbaby
+0 -0
Man, that shouldn't have been so funny. And yet it was.
Man, that shouldn't have been so funny. And yet it was.
layzerblade
+1 -0
The way I heard it, you wait for her to say "you're the boss," then you correct her %u2014 "Tony Danza 's the boss!" %u2014 then donkey punch her.
The way I heard it, you wait for her to say "you're the boss," then you correct her %u2014 "Tony Danza 's the boss!" %u2014 then donkey punch her.
thorfinn
+0 -1
Or the toboggan
going at it doggy style at the top of a flight of stairs, then you smack right between the girl's shoulder blades, and when she lifts her arms up, grab the wrists, thrust really hard, and ride her down the stairs.
There's a list of like 50 of these online somewhere, all rather disturbing and many fairly violent.
Or the toboggan
going at it doggy style at the top of a flight of stairs, then you smack right between the girl's shoulder blades, and when she lifts her arms up, grab the wrists, thrust really hard, and ride her down the stairs.
There's a list of like 50 of these online somewhere, all rather disturbing and many fairly violent.
phthoggos
+3 -0
dude you would either be really great or really terrible at parties
dude you would either be really great or really terrible at parties
xiaomimi
+20 -0
Today's Blogs
Ray: Damn but am I brewing fine beer!
Onstad: I rescued the day with orzo.
Today's Blogs
Ray: Damn but am I brewing fine beer!
Onstad: I rescued the day with orzo.
straw
+4 -0
When I was a-perusing these comments sections, it took me a second to realize exactly what you were on about. I'm just here to say, good on ya.
When I was a-perusing these comments sections, it took me a second to realize exactly what you were on about. I'm just here to say, good on ya.
cpnglxynchos
+1 -0
i took right away, but in any case, the sentiment is seconded...and chubbied.
i took right away, but in any case, the sentiment is seconded...and chubbied.
charchar
+0 -0
The anthropomorphic cats have better chat grammar than roughly 85% of my high school population.
The anthropomorphic cats have better chat grammar than roughly 85% of my high school population.
sleepyhead
+0 -0
whats a cleveland steamer?
whats a cleveland steamer?
geysershitdick
+0 -0
whats a google?
whats a google?
mangtastic
+1 -0
It's where the lady drives all the way to Cleveland all ticked off about something the man did.
It's where the lady drives all the way to Cleveland all ticked off about something the man did.
stubob
+0 -0
There is a sushi restaurant near my house that offers a specialty roll called the Dirty Sanchez. No Joke.
There is a sushi restaurant near my house that offers a specialty roll called the Dirty Sanchez. No Joke.
sp1derbaby
+0 -0
Photo!
Photo!
akadriver
+0 -0
Why would anyone order that?
Though if the Dirty Sanchez were in fact a burrito wrapped up in a sushi roll, that would be all right.
Why would anyone order that?
Though if the Dirty Sanchez were in fact a burrito wrapped up in a sushi roll, that would be all right.
i_love_kate
+1 -0
Wouldn't the other way round make far, far, far more sense?
Wouldn't the other way round make far, far, far more sense?
davey-boy
+0 -0
Seaweed wrapped in softshell wrapped in seaweed ad infinitum.
Seaweed wrapped in softshell wrapped in seaweed ad infinitum.
nlaw
+0 -0
The Kilty Monroe is the symbol of my love for Roast Beef.
The Kilty Monroe is the symbol of my love for Roast Beef.
ryanfuss
+0 -0
The toadspatter southside...self explanatory...
The toadspatter southside...self explanatory...
goatmasterflash
+0 -0
in which a fella with rampant genital warts ejaculates forcefully upon the rear end of someone else with rampant genital warts?
in which a fella with rampant genital warts ejaculates forcefully upon the rear end of someone else with rampant genital warts?
aperson
+0 -0
The Minnesota Timeline just cracks me up.
The Minnesota Timeline just cracks me up.
drskradley
+0 -0
Felching (I can't believe this hasn't been mentioned yet)
The Spiderman
Cincinatti Bowtie
The Houdini
The Alaskan Pipeline
(I think it should be noted now that the half of these moves aren't to be done if 1. you have any respect for the other person, 2. you intend it to be a lasting relationship, and 3. you are not a complete people-hating sociopath)
Felching (I can't believe this hasn't been mentioned yet)
The Spiderman
Cincinatti Bowtie
The Houdini
The Alaskan Pipeline
(I think it should be noted now that the half of these moves aren't to be done if 1. you have any respect for the other person, 2. you intend it to be a lasting relationship, and 3. you are not a complete people-hating sociopath)
mosana
+2 -0
Commodore
Commodore
mercuri0us
+0 -0
Read admiral
Read admiral
mercuri0us
+0 -0
Rear
Rear
woodenteeth
+0 -0
The Read Admiral. While wearing an 18th Century Admiral's outfit ( sans pants ) you take the lady from behind while laying out a nautical map on her back.
Yelling Land, ya Ho!
The Read Admiral. While wearing an 18th Century Admiral's outfit ( sans pants ) you take the lady from behind while laying out a nautical map on her back.
Yelling Land, ya Ho!
wolfechu
+0 -0
The world is a slightly darker place now that I know what a Kilty Monroe is. And also know there's a faint possibility I might see such a thing one day.
The world is a slightly darker place now that I know what a Kilty Monroe is. And also know there's a faint possibility I might see such a thing one day.
goriasxy
+0 -0
No $hit?
No $hit?
jar
+0 -0
I like how the chat program is 6.0. Beef did hell of revisions to get "Ray_and_Beef_Chat" to where it is today.
I like how the chat program is 6.0. Beef did hell of revisions to get "Ray_and_Beef_Chat" to where it is today.
beverage
+0 -0
140 comments and no mention of Snowballing
140 comments and no mention of Snowballing
hendetta
+0 -0
The Recycling Center.
The courteous farmer.
Kubrick's method.
The Recycling Center.
The courteous farmer.
Kubrick's method.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
The Fine Oak Structure.
The Fine Oak Structure.
wedmund
+0 -0
Ray and Beef: joining Don Quixote and Sancho Panza among the great literary duos.
Ray and Beef: joining Don Quixote and Sancho Panza among the great literary duos.
dcofosho224
+0 -0
the tuscaloosa dumpling
the tuscaloosa dumpling
we should start a magna carta of sex terms here on this comment page.
A comment left by jdhenry105 was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by blastradius, kylank, Ariamaki, riotnrrd, michellemarie, tsolless)
strawberry shortcake
Rainbow Kiss
dunkin' donut.
The Tallahasse Crowbar.
A comment left by biomusicologist was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ted0phile, littlecat, Ariamaki, odog, RBK, genequagmire)
I actually made it up. And, as far as I can tell, misspelled the name. Chubby for garnering three lames based on being from a certain place, though.
People just get all FURIOUS on tequila when people are from places.
As am I.
Amish Unicycle.
The Salieri Uppercut
The man poisons mozart, while punching his woman's chin.
is that sexxy tho
A comment left by severide was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by noooo_oo_oo, jesupocalypse, Archon_Divinus)
The compassionate conservative.
(an unannounced lubeless butt-fuck)
a winner is you!
A comment left by pogo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ted0phile, UncleRifle, johnnybaverage, littlecat, Hipjiverobot, dizneedave, antecen, farqussus, NDCaesar, fancypants, Captain_Arlo, joamiq)
The old Assetbarian does not understand what is going on.
The Rusty Trombone
I'm more partial to the Swordfishtrombone
The Milky Hornet
Seeing that under Philippe's eager face makes me feel concerned.
Milky Concerned?
A Toledo Pipecutter was the first one I came up with. I was in an antique shop and saw a tool with the name and immediately knew it had to be on my list.
The Spiky Walnut.
...actually, that sounds rather unpleasant *wines*
The Serve
The Angry Pirate
The Flying Arabian
Felching (I can't believe this hasn't been mentioned yet)
The Spiderman
Cincinatti Bowtie
The Houdini
The Alaskan Pipeline
(I think it should be noted now that the half of these moves aren't to be done if 1. you have any respect for the other person, 2. you intend it to be a lasting relationship, and 3. you are not a complete people-hating sociopath)
Alligator/Crocodile Fuckhouse
Abe Lincoln
Angry Dragon
Glass Bottom Boat
Puerto Rican Smile
In which you cut the lady's throat and then she dies.
Bolivian Necktie?
fine, sure. take the fun out of life.
The French Mistake
Arabian Apple-pick
Mexican Rorsach
Poor Man's Burrito
Mexican Halloween
Don't feel bad, Davey-Boy, I caught your awesome Blazing Saddles reference.
I'm so glad people are still responding to this.
The Sacramende Spoonful.
The New England Clam Chowder: When the lady pukes at the moment the dude is doing his funnest business.
The Turkish Gentlemen: A lady sits down peeing while the man stands peeing through the triangle she makes with the seat. Named because this is the right thing to do in Turkey after a good date.
edit to the new england clam chowder: She is obviously downing his rod when this thing happens.
The Louisville Plugger
The Bowie: This is where you sex anyone and wake up in the morning with a naked Mick Jagger sleeping in your bed
South Jersey bathroom.
How many of these involve shit
The "Phallus v. Rectum"
The comment thread
The magna carta