dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately
+0 -0
A comment left by dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by randombeing, snowman, blastradius, NeoNaoNeo, gothfae, rudegrrl, flazisismuss, cuntpills69, falseprophet, treasureplane, RitardoMontabum, sneechles, Paco, DougTheHead, Miku224, luckypyjamas, idsyen, RogueCheddar, Combustache, Doc_Rostov, Wolfslice, thatcrazycommie, perhapsmaybe, hardelicious, echidnaboy, aperson)
A comment left by dr_manflesh_desires_anal_play_immediately was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by randombeing, snowman, blastradius, NeoNaoNeo, gothfae, rudegrrl, flazisismuss, cuntpills69, falseprophet, treasureplane, RitardoMontabum, sneechles, Paco, DougTheHead, Miku224, luckypyjamas, idsyen, RogueCheddar, Combustache, Doc_Rostov, Wolfslice, thatcrazycommie, perhapsmaybe, hardelicious, echidnaboy, aperson)
maximus
+1 -1
Well they always said being dead adds ten pounds but it really becomes you, Mr. Mercury.
Well they always said being dead adds ten pounds but it really becomes you, Mr. Mercury.
thedudeabides85
+15 -2
Didn't John Lennon once say, of the Beatles, that they could have just produced a record of themselves going to the bathroom and it would have sold a million copies. This is how I feel about Dr. Manflesh's comments. He has such cachet with us assetbar contributors that "tit poop" (a minimalist piece of slash fiction), will earn him 30 chubbies.
Didn't John Lennon once say, of the Beatles, that they could have just produced a record of themselves going to the bathroom and it would have sold a million copies. This is how I feel about Dr. Manflesh's comments. He has such cachet with us assetbar contributors that "tit poop" (a minimalist piece of slash fiction), will earn him 30 chubbies.
dovey
+0 -0
Dang I wasn't gonna chubby it but now I kinda feel I have to, if only to bump it up to thirty.
Dang I wasn't gonna chubby it but now I kinda feel I have to, if only to bump it up to thirty.
streever
+1 -0
I disagree. I feel that Manflesh was a dissapointment today.
I disagree. I feel that Manflesh was a dissapointment today.
sarabria
+1 -0
It would have sold two million if it were a record of themselves going to the bathroom on Kraftwerk
It would have sold two million if it were a record of themselves going to the bathroom on Kraftwerk
numberkillinger
+5 -1
Assetbar be a harsh mistress, but those whom she favours lead charmed assetlives free of consequence.
Next week: Manflesh kills and eats a Jewish baby.
Assetbar be a harsh mistress, but those whom she favours lead charmed assetlives free of consequence.
Next week: Manflesh kills and eats a Jewish baby.
drskradley
+2 -0
But will the baby be Kosher?
'Spose it all depends how we kill it, really. Oh yeah, we're all going to be a part of this infanticide, I forgot to tell you.
My mother would be so ashamed of me right now. All the other mothers would surely be wondering what kind of mother I had.
I'm tired.
But will the baby be Kosher?
'Spose it all depends how we kill it, really. Oh yeah, we're all going to be a part of this infanticide, I forgot to tell you.
My mother would be so ashamed of me right now. All the other mothers would surely be wondering what kind of mother I had.
I'm tired.
steev_dayv
+0 -0
I will supply the Rabbi. We will bless the jew baby before the feast.
I will supply the Rabbi. We will bless the jew baby before the feast.
steev_dayv
+0 -0
I'm not sure if you're refrencing a David Cross joke, but I appreciate the parallels all the same.
I'm not sure if you're refrencing a David Cross joke, but I appreciate the parallels all the same.
numberkillinger
+0 -0
if by "referencing" you mean "stealing brazenly" then yes.
if by "referencing" you mean "stealing brazenly" then yes.
earendil
+0 -1
Everyone, remember the context!!! This is ASHERDAN APPRECIATION WEEK!!! Horatio just wants you all to know how much he appreciates Asherdan! It's as much as he appreciates Tit Poop! THAT MUCH!!!
Everyone, remember the context!!! This is ASHERDAN APPRECIATION WEEK!!! Horatio just wants you all to know how much he appreciates Asherdan! It's as much as he appreciates Tit Poop! THAT MUCH!!!
gladi8orrex
+0 -0
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, Contrasoma, Pox, Thorfinn, NeoNaoNeo, skrizach, cmjhogan, dennycrane, Kleptonis, catgrl131, Paco, DougTheHead, habnabit, BlueLoggy, aHatOfPig, Ihmgard, gardenhead_, opprobrium, nutmeg, achilleselbow, NumberKillinger, Mastronaut)
A comment left by gladi8orrex was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, Contrasoma, Pox, Thorfinn, NeoNaoNeo, skrizach, cmjhogan, dennycrane, Kleptonis, catgrl131, Paco, DougTheHead, habnabit, BlueLoggy, aHatOfPig, Ihmgard, gardenhead_, opprobrium, nutmeg, achilleselbow, NumberKillinger, Mastronaut)
doc_rostov
+20 -0
Sweet Jesus. I don't think there's any way you could have botched that name up more, Mr. gladi8orrex. Unless you chanced to add numbers, as you did in your own ill-wrought aponym. In fact...
'c0r3neliu$z'.
I stand corrected!
Sweet Jesus. I don't think there's any way you could have botched that name up more, Mr. gladi8orrex. Unless you chanced to add numbers, as you did in your own ill-wrought aponym. In fact...
'c0r3neliu$z'.
I stand corrected!
diggidy
+0 -0
I have chubbied you, thus ending our humor/recognition transaction.
A Would chubby again.
I have chubbied you, thus ending our humor/recognition transaction.
A Would chubby again.
diggidy
+0 -0
right... plus signs don't work. I knew this. I knew this.
right... plus signs don't work. I knew this. I knew this.
daidai
+0 -0
I know your avatar doesn't intend this, but its exclusion of lesbians makes me giggle.
I can imagine a redneck saying:
"I'm all for gay marriage, but lesbians are gross"
I know your avatar doesn't intend this, but its exclusion of lesbians makes me giggle.
I can imagine a redneck saying:
"I'm all for gay marriage, but lesbians are gross"
hedonismbot
+0 -0
The funny part of this for me is that the male mind usually works in the reverse of this. Two porny lesbians getting mad rutty is 'hot', while two middle aged gay men holding hands is 'icky'. That is a hilarious thing.
The funny part of this for me is that the male mind usually works in the reverse of this. Two porny lesbians getting mad rutty is 'hot', while two middle aged gay men holding hands is 'icky'. That is a hilarious thing.
boredom_man
+0 -0
"Guy" mind, please. "Male" is a medical word, not a cultural phenomenon; I realize you said "usually" but even that only applies to Western straight males aged 12-60ish; i.e., guys.
"Guy" mind, please. "Male" is a medical word, not a cultural phenomenon; I realize you said "usually" but even that only applies to Western straight males aged 12-60ish; i.e., guys.
heccibiggs
+13 -0
What kind of condoms are you using?
(Note: Rhetorical question. Obviously gladi8orrex has never had use for a condom, ever.)
What kind of condoms are you using?
(Note: Rhetorical question. Obviously gladi8orrex has never had use for a condom, ever.)
neonaoneo
+10 -0
Incorrect, guy had SO many oranges to carry
Incorrect, guy had SO many oranges to carry
mattfish
+7 -0
seven lemons = how many oranges? it is a math problem.
seven lemons = how many oranges? it is a math problem.
neonaoneo
+0 -0
Dear God, you are so right. And I am so wrong.
I meant lemons, my lack of achewood knowledge is inexcusable...
Assetbar, I apologise.
(I am being sincere)
Dear God, you are so right. And I am so wrong.
I meant lemons, my lack of achewood knowledge is inexcusable...
Assetbar, I apologise.
(I am being sincere)
morelaak
+0 -1
Answer depends on the size of the oranges. are we talking tangelos or navel oranges?
nevertheless, i can assure you that the number of oranges shall always be less than the number of lemons, due to the Greater Cornelian Citrus Fruit Reference.
Answer depends on the size of the oranges. are we talking tangelos or navel oranges?
nevertheless, i can assure you that the number of oranges shall always be less than the number of lemons, due to the Greater Cornelian Citrus Fruit Reference.
hedonismbot
+1 -1
(I'm so sorry about this) It's even more difficult than that. It really depends on the sphere packing solution of the lemons relative to the oranges. Since they are clearly not uniform (nor perfectly spherical), a straightforward lattice approach would fail miserably, and the old hexagonal method wouldn't be optimal either. It is an unsolved problem in mathematics as to how many oranges you could fit into an n-lemon condom.
(I'm so sorry about this) It's even more difficult than that. It really depends on the sphere packing solution of the lemons relative to the oranges. Since they are clearly not uniform (nor perfectly spherical), a straightforward lattice approach would fail miserably, and the old hexagonal method wouldn't be optimal either. It is an unsolved problem in mathematics as to how many oranges you could fit into an n-lemon condom.
gmm
+3 -0
Well, he might have used one for what is known colloquially in England as a "posh wank".
Well, he might have used one for what is known colloquially in England as a "posh wank".
harry
+2 -1
perhaps cornelius will be reunited with his german cellmate?
perhaps cornelius will be reunited with his german cellmate?
boredom_man
+6 -0
Once again, he did leave the light on.
Once again, he did leave the light on.
keir
+2 -0
It's a frame up! Damn Mr Teal to teal hell.
It's a frame up! Damn Mr Teal to teal hell.
jrpigman
+101 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
hamscout
+1 -0
1) A chubby for you.
2) I got to be Chubby #69
3) Oooh la LA!
1) A chubby for you.
2) I got to be Chubby #69
3) Oooh la LA!
daidai
+1 -0
jrpigman, you may have the most stupendous chubby:post:lame ratio on all of assetbar.
Most excellent are your photoshops.
jrpigman, you may have the most stupendous chubby:post:lame ratio on all of assetbar.
Most excellent are your photoshops.
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
I haven't done research or anything, but I would hazard a guess that xiaomimi (the gal who posts the the links to the blog entries on corresponding strip dates) would probably hold that title.
And rightly so.
I haven't done research or anything, but I would hazard a guess that xiaomimi (the gal who posts the the links to the blog entries on corresponding strip dates) would probably hold that title.
And rightly so.
hedonismbot
+0 -0
Have you met our friend Edwell?
Have you met our friend Edwell?
fineoakstructure
+0 -0
I think this was at about the same time that edwell had just started posting his chubby magnet posts, so when I posted it, it was probably true.
but really what's up with that guy? He's like the T-1000 of Chucklebots. IS HE ONSTAD??!
I think this was at about the same time that edwell had just started posting his chubby magnet posts, so when I posted it, it was probably true.
but really what's up with that guy? He's like the T-1000 of Chucklebots. IS HE ONSTAD??!
jrpigman
+0 -0
True or not, Thanks dogg.
True or not, Thanks dogg.
milesdonovan
+0 -1
Cornelius is all done up in double-breasted badass style. I guess sometimes even that's not enough to keep the cops from mistaking you a consumer of child pornography
Cornelius is all done up in double-breasted badass style. I guess sometimes even that's not enough to keep the cops from mistaking you a consumer of child pornography
finemusk
+1 -0
he looks like a character in a Jules Verne novel.. just add airship goggles
he looks like a character in a Jules Verne novel.. just add airship goggles
king_duncan
+0 -0
I was thinking more "Tron". Maybe it's the hat.
I was thinking more "Tron". Maybe it's the hat.
nickgranger
+1 -0
[IMGS OFF]
first try with bbcode. be gentle
[IMGS OFF]
first try with bbcode. be gentle
sncether
+6 -0
Quote:
, whispered Milton as he placed his left ankle on his desk mousepad, lycra straining to the limit.
Quote:
first try with bbcode. be gentle
, whispered Milton as he placed his left ankle on his desk mousepad, lycra straining to the limit.
lateadopter
+0 -0
This may be worse than the two-headed baby.
This may be worse than the two-headed baby.
biff
+0 -0
IS worse. The baby didn't choose to look the way she looks.
IS worse. The baby didn't choose to look the way she looks.
heccibiggs
+2 -0
nooooooooooooo male camel toe
nooooooooooooo male camel toe
synnah
+1 -0
Instinctively, I looked at it upon reading this. Christ.
Instinctively, I looked at it upon reading this. Christ.
invidious
+3 -0
This gives a new and horrifying meaning to "Chubby."
This gives a new and horrifying meaning to "Chubby."
tron_guys_mom
+1 -1
do not be hating on my son simple because he was blessed with supreme mooseknuckle
griggs_although
do not be hating on my son simple because he was blessed with supreme mooseknuckle
griggs_although
nickgranger
+0 -0
[/cameltoe]
[/cameltoe]
koodge
+1 -0
This is the saddest thing.
This is the saddest thing.
daidai
+1 -0
...dad?
...dad?
tekende
+0 -0
Virtual chubby.
Virtual chubby.
margargaret
+0 -0
This was also my first thought.
This was also my first thought.
gardenhead_
+0 -1
I thought Ray had already taken care of Nolan after he tried to molest Philippe
I thought Ray had already taken care of Nolan after he tried to molest Philippe
habnabit
+11 -1
Obviously you weren't paying attention.
Obviously you weren't paying attention.
gardenhead_
+1 -0
a chubby for you
a chubby for you
autrepoupee
+6 -0
That was Southside Nolan.
That was Southside Nolan.
deusoma
+0 -0
Oh God, I just imagined a world where every district is assigned its own pervert named Nolan. Would they have to take some kind of fetish test? God help the man who knows.
Oh God, I just imagined a world where every district is assigned its own pervert named Nolan. Would they have to take some kind of fetish test? God help the man who knows.
falseprophet
+0 -0
When Gokou died, he had to go travel on Snakeway to find Northside Nolan. From him, he learned to use the Money Shot.
When Gokou died, he had to go travel on Snakeway to find Northside Nolan. From him, he learned to use the Money Shot.
talix18
+1 -0
I assumed Ray had taken care of Nolan as far as relations with Philippe, rather than Nolan in general.
I assumed Ray had taken care of Nolan as far as relations with Philippe, rather than Nolan in general.
vermy
+0 -0
Possibly Nolan is the collective name of a succession of Achewood's "Main Pervert of the Internet"s, akin to the Dalai Lama?
Possibly Nolan is the collective name of a succession of Achewood's "Main Pervert of the Internet"s, akin to the Dalai Lama?
hygraed
+2 -0
Cornelius' "hearing hat" looks like an old-style leather football helmet, with convenient ear-pockets.
Also, call me a traitor, but the fact that Keith listens to Madness makes him pretty okay in my book.
Cornelius' "hearing hat" looks like an old-style leather football helmet, with convenient ear-pockets.
Also, call me a traitor, but the fact that Keith listens to Madness makes him pretty okay in my book.
synnah
+3 -0
According to the police officer's reaction, it would seem to be a paedophile's hat.
According to the police officer's reaction, it would seem to be a paedophile's hat.
spectre
+0 -0
Traitor!
Traitor!
dovey
+1 -0
The whole outfit looks like the kind of thing men wore when driving Model-T Fords and other similar automobiles.
The whole outfit looks like the kind of thing men wore when driving Model-T Fords and other similar automobiles.
cavebaby
+5 -0
I must concur. I imagine the publican to be lightly slapping his jolly hands upon his hairy and palid legs, all the while "harumph!"-ing along to "Our House" with an air of private amusement. I also imagine he would look upon his excrement with pride and a wink as he finished.
I must concur. I imagine the publican to be lightly slapping his jolly hands upon his hairy and palid legs, all the while "harumph!"-ing along to "Our House" with an air of private amusement. I also imagine he would look upon his excrement with pride and a wink as he finished.
tekende
+0 -0
This seems a good place to note that the lyrics to "Our House" are really fucking weird.
This seems a good place to note that the lyrics to "Our House" are really fucking weird.
fermatprime
+0 -0
THEY SUCK!
("takes its toll..." SIXTY-NINE CENTS PLEASE!)
THEY SUCK!
("takes its toll..." SIXTY-NINE CENTS PLEASE!)
maximus
+5 -0
I can't decide if Cornelius' cat burglar ensemble is an hommage to The Avengers (Mr. Teal = Miss Peel?) or "Take on Me".
I can't decide if Cornelius' cat burglar ensemble is an hommage to The Avengers (Mr. Teal = Miss Peel?) or "Take on Me".
maximus
+1 -0
And have no fear, gentle readers: Cornelius will bounce back from this little adventure as nimbly as Pete Townsend with anew hearing aid battery.
And have no fear, gentle readers: Cornelius will bounce back from this little adventure as nimbly as Pete Townsend with anew hearing aid battery.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
The wrench has been replaced by a spade apparently?
The wrench has been replaced by a spade apparently?
agentj
+1 -0
Keith looks more of a Lip Up Fatty fellow to me. But it takes all publicans.
Keith looks more of a Lip Up Fatty fellow to me. But it takes all publicans.
rachel
+0 -0
A comment left by rachel was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by nbgreene, skrizach, zaratustra, Vargavind)
A comment left by rachel was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by nbgreene, skrizach, zaratustra, Vargavind)
maximus
+1 -0
Don't get me wrong, but I sense a growing "Very Special Episode of Blossom" vibe to this arc.
Alas. Plus ca change...
Don't get me wrong, but I sense a growing "Very Special Episode of Blossom" vibe to this arc.
Alas. Plus ca change...
hamscout
+81 -1
I think the message might get a little garbled...
[IMGS OFF]
...and they all learned a valuable lesson...
I think the message might get a little garbled...
[IMGS OFF]
...and they all learned a valuable lesson...
tbtabby
+8 -0
...this holiday season.
...this holiday season.
snowman
+0 -0
Hilarious. I also like how this sums up the weirdness of this arc, and of Achewood in general.
Hilarious. I also like how this sums up the weirdness of this arc, and of Achewood in general.
mugi
+0 -0
I love this. Just letting you know.
I love this. Just letting you know.
falseprophet
+0 -1
Okay. Your avatar is simply too cute for me to not know from which anime it hails. Girl, inform me.
Okay. Your avatar is simply too cute for me to not know from which anime it hails. Girl, inform me.
mugi
+0 -0
One Piece, the Achewood of anime.
One Piece, the Achewood of anime.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
is it really?
is it really?
destroy_you
+4 -0
Cornelius prompty handed the three police officers (and another twelve that were called to the scene soon after) their asses wrapped in newspaper.
Upon returning home, he responds to Ray's quieries as to what he heard in an off hand manner, shuts the door to his room, gently turns off the light and promptly falls into a peaceful slumber.
The dude is more raw then sushi.
Cornelius prompty handed the three police officers (and another twelve that were called to the scene soon after) their asses wrapped in newspaper.
Upon returning home, he responds to Ray's quieries as to what he heard in an off hand manner, shuts the door to his room, gently turns off the light and promptly falls into a peaceful slumber.
The dude is more raw then sushi.
numberkillinger
+7 -0
Mr. Bear ain't got to beat on police, he'll go to court if he has to. He will represent himself. And he will win.
Mr. Bear ain't got to beat on police, he'll go to court if he has to. He will represent himself. And he will win.
daidai
+1 -0
Plus is he ever decided he actually needed a lawyer, Ray could get anybody.
Even Jackie Chiles.
Plus is he ever decided he actually needed a lawyer, Ray could get anybody.
Even Jackie Chiles.
numberkillinger
+7 -0
Denny Crane.
Denny Crane.
drskradley
+1 -0
He could take the cops on. All depends what he's been drinking.
Wrong place, wrong time. That's all. The cops will learn this.
Connie and his tit-hat will not go quietly.
He could take the cops on. All depends what he's been drinking.
Wrong place, wrong time. That's all. The cops will learn this.
Connie and his tit-hat will not go quietly.
synnah
+0 -0
Paedo-hat.
Paedo-hat.
pogo
+0 -0
Aww, those cute little cat-ear nubbins aren't tits at all, you twit.
Aww, those cute little cat-ear nubbins aren't tits at all, you twit.
irondave
+1 -0
Bear-ears, of course.
Bear-ears, of course.
pogo
+0 -0
Oh yeah, some of the characters aren't cats. My bad. I am the twit.
Oh yeah, some of the characters aren't cats. My bad. I am the twit.
drskradley
+0 -0
I only realised that they were ears this morning in the shower. I don't know what I was viewing that brought this train of thought up, but there you go.
I only realised that they were ears this morning in the shower. I don't know what I was viewing that brought this train of thought up, but there you go.
pogo
+0 -0
Latere identified as a Victorian tinninitus cap.
Latere identified as a Victorian tinninitus cap.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
I'll assume that what you mean is sashimi.
(I love the cheap thrill of posting comments whose only purpose is to acquire lames.)
I'll assume that what you mean is sashimi.
(I love the cheap thrill of posting comments whose only purpose is to acquire lames.)
achilleselbow
+11 -1
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
steinhauser
+2 -0
That's not the Weeaboo. That's the man who paddles the Weeaboo.
That's not the Weeaboo. That's the man who paddles the Weeaboo.
autrepoupee
+1 -0
is it really pronounced this way? i've never been near such a person, so I do not know. my folks talk about good, clean, honest American animation, like Ralph Bakshi.
is it really pronounced this way? i've never been near such a person, so I do not know. my folks talk about good, clean, honest American animation, like Ralph Bakshi.
synnah
+0 -0
Not really. The 'ni' syllable is shorter than 'nee', so it's more 'Ah-nih-meh'.
Oops.
Not really. The 'ni' syllable is shorter than 'nee', so it's more 'Ah-nih-meh'.
Oops.
boredom_man
+0 -0
No worries, man, they got hypnotists who can help you forget that stuff.
No worries, man, they got hypnotists who can help you forget that stuff.
destroy_you
+4 -1
It's actually pronounced En-eh-ma
It's actually pronounced En-eh-ma
wittyname
+0 -0
I work in a store called the "Anime Stop" and I pronounce it "Ah-neh-may". Since I work there, I have no authority and win.
(Okay, I don't actually work there I would be ashamaed if I did. I work in the affiliated store The Comic Book Shoppe and sometimes work shifts there. I'm sorry I lied.)
I work in a store called the "Anime Stop" and I pronounce it "Ah-neh-may". Since I work there, I have no authority and win.
(Okay, I don't actually work there I would be ashamaed if I did. I work in the affiliated store The Comic Book Shoppe and sometimes work shifts there. I'm sorry I lied.)
synnah
+0 -0
In that case, do you pronounce Shoppe as simply 'Shop', or as 'Shoppy'? Surely this is something you have authority over.
In that case, do you pronounce Shoppe as simply 'Shop', or as 'Shoppy'? Surely this is something you have authority over.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
If we were being olde Englishe, you'd pronounce it "Shopp-uh".
If we were being olde Englishe, you'd pronounce it "Shopp-uh".
achilleselbow
+0 -0
This would probably be better if I had posted the title of that strip, taken (as with all spamusement comics) from a spam email subject line. The title was "First Time Anal - Girls Love It!"
This would probably be better if I had posted the title of that strip, taken (as with all spamusement comics) from a spam email subject line. The title was "First Time Anal - Girls Love It!"
jesler729
+1 -0
Man getting set up by a bird on a computer is hardly raw I'd say it's more akin to a well-done filet mignon with Hunt's ketchup
Man getting set up by a bird on a computer is hardly raw I'd say it's more akin to a well-done filet mignon with Hunt's ketchup
destroy_you
+0 -0
But proceeding to get out of a situation involving 15 cops with just a shovel and a finch watching from the safety of circitry is.
But proceeding to get out of a situation involving 15 cops with just a shovel and a finch watching from the safety of circitry is.
skoora
+4 -0
Ray has no idea.
Ray has no idea.
skrizach
+0 -0
A comment left by skrizach was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Dovey, randombeing, Thorfinn, NeoNaoNeo, mortshire, lemnlime2)
A comment left by skrizach was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Dovey, randombeing, Thorfinn, NeoNaoNeo, mortshire, lemnlime2)
dovey
+0 -1
NOT AGAIN!
NOT AGAIN!
biomusicologist
+0 -0
Perfect avatar/comment convergence.
Perfect avatar/comment convergence.
spectre
+0 -0
"Northside" is Nolan's name when he is not on the Internet.
"Northside" is Nolan's name when he is not on the Internet.
mrclarinet
+2 -0
Keith totally listens to Madness. I should have seen it
Keith totally listens to Madness. I should have seen it
atmostat
+0 -0
I never knew Tesceaux did aftershave..
I never knew Tesceaux did aftershave..
duskbringer
+2 -0
Yes. Narrowly avoided a lawsuit there.
Wait a minute. That's the hound from The Fox And The Hound, isn't it? Oh god I cry when I even think about that movie. Don't go near the tracks, hound OH GOD
Yes. Narrowly avoided a lawsuit there.
Wait a minute. That's the hound from The Fox And The Hound, isn't it? Oh god I cry when I even think about that movie. Don't go near the tracks, hound OH GOD
dreamachine
+0 -0
A comment left by dreamachine was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by phthoggos, Thorfinn, falseprophet, sizone, MrFlunchy, opprobrium, aikennubbles, I_Love_Kate)
A comment left by dreamachine was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by phthoggos, Thorfinn, falseprophet, sizone, MrFlunchy, opprobrium, aikennubbles, I_Love_Kate)
synnah
+2 -0
Tesceaux Finest: Mulberry and Caviar scent. It costs a little more than the stuff you can get in Sainesburye's, but it makes Keith feel that little bit more special, y'know?
Tesceaux Finest: Mulberry and Caviar scent. It costs a little more than the stuff you can get in Sainesburye's, but it makes Keith feel that little bit more special, y'know?
spinynorman
+2 -0
I like the implication that Keith only washes his head.
I like the implication that Keith only washes his head.
numberkillinger
+0 -0
he rinses his head. bald people rinse their heads.
he rinses his head. bald people rinse their heads.
myrrdisparo
+0 -0
No we don't
No we don't
spinynorman
+1 -0
Phew, I was worried for a second.
Phew, I was worried for a second.
spectre
+0 -0
We rinse and sometimes polish.
We rinse and sometimes polish.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
Probably rinses it after shaving it bald. At least that was my initial assumption. Am I wrong?
Probably rinses it after shaving it bald. At least that was my initial assumption. Am I wrong?
syx
+0 -0
I was informed by my aptly-named media studies teacher, Mr. Bald, that bald people will routinely rub conditioner into their scalp so as not to incur the wrath of ingrown hairs.
I was informed by my aptly-named media studies teacher, Mr. Bald, that bald people will routinely rub conditioner into their scalp so as not to incur the wrath of ingrown hairs.
tekende
+0 -0
There's a joke there somewhere, something that might be uttered in a sitcom, followed by canned laughter, but I can't quite make it work.
There's a joke there somewhere, something that might be uttered in a sitcom, followed by canned laughter, but I can't quite make it work.
pr0ncess
+0 -0
Tesceaux = Tesco eau de toilette?
Tesceaux = Tesco eau de toilette?
cpnglxynchos
+1 -1
soooo dignifiiiiied
soooo dignifiiiiied
linning
+0 -0
Like pronouncing Target " Tar-Zhay ".
Like pronouncing Target " Tar-Zhay ".
miku224
+0 -0
I am guilty of this.
I am guilty of this.
daidai
+0 -0
No you aren't.
No you aren't.
hrm
+0 -0
once in New York my sister pronounced the Flatiron building like "fla-trion."
once in New York my sister pronounced the Flatiron building like "fla-trion."
zeltaen
+0 -0
Why would Ray assume that Cornelius was "goin' outside to bug people"?
Why would Ray assume that Cornelius was "goin' outside to bug people"?
sizone
+1 -1
Because that is exactly the kind of thing Ray would do were he wearing garments of a similar type.
Because that is exactly the kind of thing Ray would do were he wearing garments of a similar type.
autrepoupee
+5 -0
When old people wear hats like that, you know they're about to get up to some good ol' fashioned buggery.
When old people wear hats like that, you know they're about to get up to some good ol' fashioned buggery.
usversusthem
+7 -0
Well, the cops seem to think the same exact thing .
Well, the cops seem to think the same exact thing .
cleave
+1 -0
Whenever I wear a hat like that it preempts a right randy buggering.
Whenever I wear a hat like that it preempts a right randy buggering.
sn0wman
+2 -0
This is what happens to people who do not enjoy honey.
They shall all pay. Oh yes. Every man jack one of them.
This is what happens to people who do not enjoy honey.
They shall all pay. Oh yes. Every man jack one of them.
margargaret
+2 -0
yezzzzzzz
yezzzzzzz
margargaret
+0 -0
A comment left by margargaret was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, DougTheHead, opprobrium, ddgoec)
A comment left by margargaret was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, DougTheHead, opprobrium, ddgoec)
numberkillinger
+43 -0
Cornelius has fallen prey to a phinching scam.
Cornelius has fallen prey to a phinching scam.
blarghamagarky
+0 -0
zing
zing
dovey
+1 -0
I think I've chubbed you like 4 times on this page. Stop it. Stop hogging my chubs.
I think I've chubbed you like 4 times on this page. Stop it. Stop hogging my chubs.
dovey
+0 -1
You hogg my chubs you...
Yeah, I got nothing.
You hogg my chubs you...
Yeah, I got nothing.
irondave
+2 -0
...fluff my dog?
...fluff my dog?
dovey
+3 -0
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ANYMORE
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ANYMORE
numberkillinger
+8 -0
you hog my chubb, you taste my rug!
one for the ladies.
you hog my chubb, you taste my rug!
one for the ladies.
straw
+0 -0
After the first three words, I thought this was going to be a reference to "There Will Be Blood." Maybe I should stop watching it on repeat...
Ok, well only two more times.
After the first three words, I thought this was going to be a reference to "There Will Be Blood." Maybe I should stop watching it on repeat...
Ok, well only two more times.
eatmorekix
+3 -0
you hog my chub, i drink your milkshake. I DRINK IT UP
you hog my chub, i drink your milkshake. I DRINK IT UP
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
yes.
yes.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
Chubby DRAINAGEEEE!
Chubby DRAINAGEEEE!
behemothdiddums
+1 -1
The publican has a TV show in england.
The publican has a TV show in england.
solobuttons
+3 -0
Nolan.
Nolan.
daidai
+8 -0
I imagined Jerry Seinfeld saying this.
I imagined Jerry Seinfeld saying this.
straw
+0 -0
A comment left by straw was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, blastradius, InspectorGadget)
A comment left by straw was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, blastradius, InspectorGadget)
rockstarsatemy
+2 -0
in this frame, nolan is a giant and terrible cat. i don't like him.
in this frame, nolan is a giant and terrible cat. i don't like him.
woodenteeth
+0 -0
as oppossed to when he's a small and terrible cat? When he fills you with "joy"?
as oppossed to when he's a small and terrible cat? When he fills you with "joy"?
rockstarsatemy
+0 -0
i'm thinking terrible in the "terrible lizard" sense. awesome and horrific. like godzilla. when he is small, he is not really terrible. i would try to pick him up and give him kisses.
i'm thinking terrible in the "terrible lizard" sense. awesome and horrific. like godzilla. when he is small, he is not really terrible. i would try to pick him up and give him kisses.
solobuttons
+0 -0
That's pretty much exactly what I was thinking when I wrote it.
Also maybe " Lie Bot ."
That's pretty much exactly what I was thinking when I wrote it.
Also maybe " Lie Bot ."
irondave
+0 -0
So do we think that Nolan has impersonated Mr. Teal and the Publican, all to set up Cornelius?
So do we think that Nolan has impersonated Mr. Teal and the Publican, all to set up Cornelius?
spinynorman
+2 -0
No, I think they just kind of stumbled into this.
Probably only one place in town one can bury a diskette.
No, I think they just kind of stumbled into this.
Probably only one place in town one can bury a diskette.
drskradley
+0 -0
Nolan, you villain!
Nolan, you villain!
baryonyx
+0 -0
He lives. HE LIVES .
He lives. HE LIVES .
blarghamagarky
+0 -0
Mr. Teal inspired me to re-add smarterchild to my buddylist (not since 6th grade) in search of true computer conversation and companionship.
Now I just feel betrayed by both, Smarterchild for sucking, Mr. Teal for this.
Mr. Teal inspired me to re-add smarterchild to my buddylist (not since 6th grade) in search of true computer conversation and companionship.
Now I just feel betrayed by both, Smarterchild for sucking, Mr. Teal for this.
baryonyx
+1 -0
I used to amuse myself with Smarterchild by talking to it about religion and getting it to contradict itself in its desperate attempts to agree with whomever it was speaking to. Then they made updated it to say something like "As a machine, I don't care about theological matters" and I was left wanting for a computer over which to assert my logical superiority.
I used to amuse myself with Smarterchild by talking to it about religion and getting it to contradict itself in its desperate attempts to agree with whomever it was speaking to. Then they made updated it to say something like "As a machine, I don't care about theological matters" and I was left wanting for a computer over which to assert my logical superiority.
blarghamagarky
+0 -0
I know right! He has no comment on anything anymore.
I know right! He has no comment on anything anymore.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
and now he is dead...
i never had a truer friend than when smarterchild began talking to me.
and now he is dead...
i never had a truer friend than when smarterchild began talking to me.
ashemon
+0 -0
A laptop with a 5¼ floppy drive! That is truly the perfect computer.
A laptop with a 5¼ floppy drive! That is truly the perfect computer.
ashemon
+1 -0
View > Character Encoding > Western :)
View > Character Encoding > Western :)
synnah
+0 -0
You know, I did that once, but then I changed it back. For some reason, it wouldn't be Assetbar without the diamonds.
You know, I did that once, but then I changed it back. For some reason, it wouldn't be Assetbar without the diamonds.
usversusthem
+0 -0
Holy shit! This changes everything!
(p.s. awesome)
Holy shit! This changes everything!
(p.s. awesome)
irondave
+0 -0
Would that it were true. It is a half-measure, at best.
Would that it were true. It is a half-measure, at best.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
still no plus signs.
still no plus signs.
baryonyx
+1 -0
Assetbar has to eat something to survive.
Assetbar has to eat something to survive.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
four pointed masses of pixels burnt to a black crisp...
times're tough.
four pointed masses of pixels burnt to a black crisp...
times're tough.
phy
+0 -0
The lads at Shrovis-Bishopthorpe know a tried and tested storage medium when they see one.
The lads at Shrovis-Bishopthorpe know a tried and tested storage medium when they see one.
awko
+5 -2
A diskette? That'll only hold two or three good quality pictures of some kids getting rutty.
Dude's gotta upgrade.
A diskette? That'll only hold two or three good quality pictures of some kids getting rutty.
Dude's gotta upgrade.
dirtyantaeus
+9 -1
Quality over quantity. Those kids are getting HELLA rutty.
Quality over quantity. Those kids are getting HELLA rutty.
lonis
+0 -0
A comment left by lonis was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, InspectorGadget, DougTheHead, hellofditties)
A comment left by lonis was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, InspectorGadget, DougTheHead, hellofditties)
mjfitzge
+1 -0
your first joke would have been a lot funnier if you would have said something like, "what's the best thing about getting mad-rutty with twenty six year olds?"
the way you phrased it, it just sounds like a harmless birthday party at showbiz pizza or something....
your first joke would have been a lot funnier if you would have said something like, "what's the best thing about getting mad-rutty with twenty six year olds?"
the way you phrased it, it just sounds like a harmless birthday party at showbiz pizza or something....
paco
+0 -1
Q: what the difference between a table and a child?
A: you can't fuck a table.
Q: what the difference between a table and a child?
A: you can't fuck a table.
sncether
+0 -0
[url= Achewood is a website ]WRONG (on a literal level)[/url]
PS yes, I did intentionally pick the article with the funniest headline. what of it?
[url= Achewood is a website ]WRONG (on a literal level)[/url]
PS yes, I did intentionally pick the article with the funniest headline. what of it?
sncether
+0 -0
oh hell my first bbcode disaster.
TODAY, I AM AN ASSET-MAN
https://www.shortnews.com/start.cfm?id=69646
oh hell my first bbcode disaster.
TODAY, I AM AN ASSET-MAN
https://www.shortnews.com/start.cfm?id=69646
heccibiggs
+3 -0
"url=Achewood is a website"?
I can't even begin to describe your code/mess-up situation!
"url=Achewood is a website"?
I can't even begin to describe your code/mess-up situation!
sncether
+0 -0
I was copying it straight from the handy BBCode guide, just to make sure what happened didn't. Life is funny
I was copying it straight from the handy BBCode guide, just to make sure what happened didn't. Life is funny
woodenteeth
+1 -0
Q: What's the best thing about a little boy?
A: Turn him over and it's a little girl.
Q: What's the best thing about a little boy?
A: Turn him over and it's a little girl.
micolithe
+0 -0
Actually you can.
https://www.nbc10.com/news/15734256/detail.html
Actually you can.
https://www.nbc10.com/news/15734256/detail.html
tropicana
+0 -0
Why was his neighbour recording him? Isn't that the type of situation where you just lean out of your window and tell him you can see him fucking his patio funiture?
This news story leaves me with too many questions.
Why was his neighbour recording him? Isn't that the type of situation where you just lean out of your window and tell him you can see him fucking his patio funiture?
This news story leaves me with too many questions.
odei
+0 -0
Three DVDs. He recorded three DVDs worth!
While it's basic common decency not to have sex where people can accidentally see you, I think the punishments are way too extreme. $20,000 bail? Is the risk of him having sex with another bench that serious? Not as bad as this case though. Lock up your bicycles!
Three DVDs. He recorded three DVDs worth!
While it's basic common decency not to have sex where people can accidentally see you, I think the punishments are way too extreme. $20,000 bail? Is the risk of him having sex with another bench that serious? Not as bad as this case though. Lock up your bicycles!
hamscout
+0 -0
WAIT! Wait, wait... At the end of that story, they mention another man who: "was jailed for having sex with pavements "?!?!?
Was it just some horrible cultural misunderstanding about fjuking in the asphalt? Or is this another English term I haven't heard before?
WAIT! Wait, wait... At the end of that story, they mention another man who: "was jailed for having sex with pavements "?!?!?
Was it just some horrible cultural misunderstanding about fjuking in the asphalt? Or is this another English term I haven't heard before?
odei
+0 -0
I fully believe that they mean pavements as in sidewalks. I do not know, nor want to know how this works.
I fully believe that they mean pavements as in sidewalks. I do not know, nor want to know how this works.
sirhan_duran
+0 -0
Q: What's the best thing about a ten year old?
A: If you pull her hair back in the shower she looks eight.
Q: What's the best thing about a ten year old?
A: If you pull her hair back in the shower she looks eight.
falseprophet
+0 -0
I think in that one, the 'showering' is usually in the setup. So it would be "What's the best thing about showering with a ten year old?" Makes the punchline more concise.
Appreciate you bringing high quality sexalist humour to Achewood .
I think in that one, the 'showering' is usually in the setup. So it would be "What's the best thing about showering with a ten year old?" Makes the punchline more concise.
Appreciate you bringing high quality sexalist humour to Achewood .
cromar
+0 -1
You are so lame.
You are so lame.
spectre
+0 -0
Your avatar (Edison) looks more like a pedophile than Nolan does. I picture pedophiles having babyfat faces.
Your avatar (Edison) looks more like a pedophile than Nolan does. I picture pedophiles having babyfat faces.
tekende
+5 -0
And they're HELLA YELLIN' ABOUT THE MOLESTATION!
And they're HELLA YELLIN' ABOUT THE MOLESTATION!
spinynorman
+2 -0
That's the usual response to molestation, yes.
...or at least, I hope it is.
That's the usual response to molestation, yes.
...or at least, I hope it is.
numberkillinger
+1 -0
It is ASCII child porn.
It is ASCII child porn.
khailautomatic
+7 -0
Killing someone who listens to Madness?
Cornelius, you've truly gone... One step beyond.
Killing someone who listens to Madness?
Cornelius, you've truly gone... One step beyond.
clapyourhands
+0 -0
Philippe will be called to the stand as a character witness.
Philippe will be called to the stand as a character witness.
neonaoneo
+4 -1
It is a perfect...misunderstanding
It is a perfect...misunderstanding
miku224
+0 -0
V-Chub.
V-Chub.
smallblackdog
+0 -0
Is it just me or does Mr Teal look like a turd?
A worrying archetype is being released into the collective subconscious - a turd with murderous intent. This will play havoc with the nation's toilet training, mark my words.
Is it just me or does Mr Teal look like a turd?
A worrying archetype is being released into the collective subconscious - a turd with murderous intent. This will play havoc with the nation's toilet training, mark my words.
heccibiggs
+2 -0
Shit. I was like, "Yeah, whatever, no way does that finch look like a turd", but you're actually totally right. Now I can't look at him anymore.
Fuck you.
Shit. I was like, "Yeah, whatever, no way does that finch look like a turd", but you're actually totally right. Now I can't look at him anymore.
Fuck you.
dovey
+0 -0
Goddamnit a turd with a beak Goddamnit
Goddamnit a turd with a beak Goddamnit
odei
+0 -0
Turds with beaks crawling up the plumbing .
Turds with beaks crawling up the plumbing .
spectre
+0 -1
Ooohhhhhh Shhhhhhhhiiiiiiitt . . .
Ooohhhhhh Shhhhhhhhiiiiiiitt . . .
pyro_ike
+7 -0
On the upside: If Cornelius decides to avenge his honor, a turd with a bullet in it ain't exactly five o'clock news.
On the upside: If Cornelius decides to avenge his honor, a turd with a bullet in it ain't exactly five o'clock news.
pogo
+0 -0
So, your turds have eyes?
So, your turds have eyes?
spinynorman
+0 -0
And a fierce and rapacious love of honey.
And a fierce and rapacious love of honey.
spectre
+0 -0
I need a "honey wagon" joke here, but I don't have one.
Of all the honey wagon names, the funniest I ever saw was "Skylab." And that particular creaky space station was still orbiting when I used to see "Skylab" making rounds.
I need a "honey wagon" joke here, but I don't have one.
Of all the honey wagon names, the funniest I ever saw was "Skylab." And that particular creaky space station was still orbiting when I used to see "Skylab" making rounds.
pogo
+0 -0
So where does one line these days to know about "honey wagons"? I lived in Japan in the early '50s and learned the term there.
So where does one line these days to know about "honey wagons"? I lived in Japan in the early '50s and learned the term there.
pogo
+0 -0
"live"
"live"
proof_man
+0 -0
wait, wasn't nolan already taken care of? maybe ray went pro ice and the police don't know that nolan is gone?
wait, wasn't nolan already taken care of? maybe ray went pro ice and the police don't know that nolan is gone?
baryonyx
+0 -0
Either that, or Nolan somehow survived the attempt on his life made by certain men of Ray's employ, and has since been plotting a meticulous revenge on the bear who took a cricket bat to a computer when he was ever so close to having long, coveted conversations with someone who is Five while on the toilet. That his demise is to be wrought by a computer is just one layer of sick irony carefully calculated.
Either that, or Nolan somehow survived the attempt on his life made by certain men of Ray's employ, and has since been plotting a meticulous revenge on the bear who took a cricket bat to a computer when he was ever so close to having long, coveted conversations with someone who is Five while on the toilet. That his demise is to be wrought by a computer is just one layer of sick irony carefully calculated.
indiglow
+0 -1
I predict the boffin will save the day.
I predict the boffin will save the day.
spectre
+0 -0
No, BEEF will save the day. He will be hella guilty he didn't do a good security check on the Shrovis before Cornelius booted it. (Doesn't "Booting" sound like a British thing to do, now that I think on it?)
No, BEEF will save the day. He will be hella guilty he didn't do a good security check on the Shrovis before Cornelius booted it. (Doesn't "Booting" sound like a British thing to do, now that I think on it?)
odei
+0 -0
It's short for 'bootstrapping' which sounds even more British.
It's short for 'bootstrapping' which sounds even more British.
heccibiggs
+1 -0
Ray thinks he's being so insightful with that little thought in panel six.
He's right, though. Old people do cherish more often than most.
Ray thinks he's being so insightful with that little thought in panel six.
He's right, though. Old people do cherish more often than most.
fuckyoufriday
+2 -0
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
spinynorman
+1 -0
Sometimes they just sit around at home, cherishing like you wouldn't fucking believe. They seriously cherish the fuck out. I went to see my grandma and she was cherishing so hard I just got into it and started cherishing all kinds of shit. Man, I was sore the next day, though.
Sometimes they just sit around at home, cherishing like you wouldn't fucking believe. They seriously cherish the fuck out. I went to see my grandma and she was cherishing so hard I just got into it and started cherishing all kinds of shit. Man, I was sore the next day, though.
charlottien
+1 -0
Noooo! This is Cornelius! He is a gentleman! The shame could kill him! Oh Lord!
Noooo! This is Cornelius! He is a gentleman! The shame could kill him! Oh Lord!
baryonyx
+1 -0
He's old, man! He's about to commit suicide! Look at him! It's suicide for sure!
He's old, man! He's about to commit suicide! Look at him! It's suicide for sure!
thegoodwillgirl
+4 -0
I hope that Cornelius had some tequila before this risky venture. (Thus he will not be scared.)
I hope that Cornelius had some tequila before this risky venture. (Thus he will not be scared.)
pogo
+0 -2
I AM SO NOT AFRAID OF THE POLICE NOW!
I AM SO NOT AFRAID OF THE POLICE NOW!
aperson
+2 -0
IT IS A THING THAT CORNELIUS SAID IN AN ACHEWOOD STRIP.
IT IS A THING THAT CORNELIUS SAID IN AN ACHEWOOD STRIP.
achilleselbow
+3 -0
IT MADE A LOT OF SENSE TO ME.
IT MADE A LOT OF SENSE TO ME.
falseprophet
+0 -0
WHY ARE WE WHISPERING?
WHY ARE WE WHISPERING?
catgrl131
+2 -0
c-cc-combo breaker!
c-cc-combo breaker!
falseprophet
+0 -0
V-V-V-V-V-V CHUB!
V-V-V-V-V-V CHUB!
catgrl131
+1 -0
THANKS DUDE, THAT SERIOUSLY MADE ME FEEL ALL WARM AND FUZZY INSIDE! I APPRECIATE IT!
C-C-CCOMBO RE-GLUE-TOGETHER-ER!
THANKS DUDE, THAT SERIOUSLY MADE ME FEEL ALL WARM AND FUZZY INSIDE! I APPRECIATE IT!
C-C-CCOMBO RE-GLUE-TOGETHER-ER!
khailautomatic
+0 -0
If only they'll let him back to the car. Nothing makes a man more eloquent than a finger of Laphroaig.
If only they'll let him back to the car. Nothing makes a man more eloquent than a finger of Laphroaig.
prine
+0 -0
My, that was a spurious and unnecessary reference to an older strip!
My, that was a spurious and unnecessary reference to an older strip!
khailautomatic
+0 -0
Ahh, life is a series of those.
Ahh, life is a series of those.
cromar
+0 -0
You're completely right XD
You're completely right XD
pygmalion00
+4 -0
Next, on To Catch a Predator: we capture a bear...and not the fat, homosexual kind.
Next, on To Catch a Predator: we capture a bear...and not the fat, homosexual kind.
norrin
+12 -0
Chris Hansen haunts my nightmares. I don't even have any reason to worry, it's just that unnatural fear, like when I worry when I get pulled over, knowing full well I have done nothing wrong. I just know I'm going to be one of those guys that gets shot because I was "reaching for a gun" when I was actually pulling out my wallet or sneezing. I guess I don't know what the to Catch a Predator analogue of that would be.
"I wasn't trying to be a pedophile, I was taking out the garbage," I would scream as a cop dressed as a bush tackled me.
Chris Hansen haunts my nightmares. I don't even have any reason to worry, it's just that unnatural fear, like when I worry when I get pulled over, knowing full well I have done nothing wrong. I just know I'm going to be one of those guys that gets shot because I was "reaching for a gun" when I was actually pulling out my wallet or sneezing. I guess I don't know what the to Catch a Predator analogue of that would be.
"I wasn't trying to be a pedophile, I was taking out the garbage," I would scream as a cop dressed as a bush tackled me.
pygmalion00
+0 -1
That sounds like an episode of Reno 911 waiting to happen.
That sounds like an episode of Reno 911 waiting to happen.
spinynorman
+1 -0
I bet when he goes shopping or just out in public most people must flip the fuck out, all assuming he's there to bust them for something they didn't do. He goes to buy a sandwich and the sandwich vendor begins shrieking, "No! No, Mr. Hansen, I don't lust after little kid asses! No!" and stumbles out the back and starts sprinting away.
I bet when he goes shopping or just out in public most people must flip the fuck out, all assuming he's there to bust them for something they didn't do. He goes to buy a sandwich and the sandwich vendor begins shrieking, "No! No, Mr. Hansen, I don't lust after little kid asses! No!" and stumbles out the back and starts sprinting away.
norrin
+0 -0
That will be my reaction exactly.
That will be my reaction exactly.
flazisismuss
+2 -1
Everyone involved in that show should be shamed to death. I feel dirty just flipping past it on the TV. That Chris Hansen is such a disgusting little turd; why he hasn't hung himself out of shame boggles the mind. Everyone featured on it, either on camera or behind the camera, so to speak, is loathsome. It makes me ill to think that people find entertaining an hour of sickening idiots entrapping other sickening idiots into making repulsive fantasies real.
Everyone involved in that show should be shamed to death. I feel dirty just flipping past it on the TV. That Chris Hansen is such a disgusting little turd; why he hasn't hung himself out of shame boggles the mind. Everyone featured on it, either on camera or behind the camera, so to speak, is loathsome. It makes me ill to think that people find entertaining an hour of sickening idiots entrapping other sickening idiots into making repulsive fantasies real.
spinynorman
+0 -0
There was a guy that shot himself with Hansen showed up, right?
He must be a terrible houseguest to have. You invite him over for dinner, find three cameramen have nested upstairs because they were "just going through the motions."
There was a guy that shot himself with Hansen showed up, right?
He must be a terrible houseguest to have. You invite him over for dinner, find three cameramen have nested upstairs because they were "just going through the motions."
norrin
+0 -0
Yeah, his family is suing. Apparently one of the cops on site turned to a producer and said "This will make good television," or some such. That probaby doesn't hurt their case.
Yeah, his family is suing. Apparently one of the cops on site turned to a producer and said "This will make good television," or some such. That probaby doesn't hurt their case.
flazisismuss
+1 -0
Well, I can't imagine he gets invited for dinner very often. I wouldn't be comfortable eating in his presence and might kick him in the face just out of curiosity.
Well, I can't imagine he gets invited for dinner very often. I wouldn't be comfortable eating in his presence and might kick him in the face just out of curiosity.
deusoma
+0 -0
I'm going to close my eyes real tight and pretend that I have one chubby left so I can give it to you. I know they're pedophiles, but that doesn't make that show okay.
I'm going to close my eyes real tight and pretend that I have one chubby left so I can give it to you. I know they're pedophiles, but that doesn't make that show okay.
tipist
+1 -2
Chris Hansen is the world's biggest cockblock.
/sarcasm
Chris Hansen is the world's biggest cockblock.
/sarcasm
theguitarhero
+2 -0
Is it bad that I saw Mr. Bear's get-up in the first panel and immediately thought "TRON!"?
Is it bad that I saw Mr. Bear's get-up in the first panel and immediately thought "TRON!"?
irondave
+0 -0
It is bad, because now I'm thinking it too.
It is bad, because now I'm thinking it too.
norrin
+0 -0
It's worse when you think of that fat guy who made his own working (lights up) Tron suit.
It's worse when you think of that fat guy who made his own working (lights up) Tron suit.
irondave
+0 -0
Believe me, I know.
Believe me, I know.
dovey
+0 -0
No, it is in fact the rightest thing.
No, it is in fact the rightest thing.
chuvak
+0 -0
OOOOH LA LA!!!!!!!
OOOOH LA LA!!!!!!!
lonis
+0 -0
That is just so wrong coming from stretched neckbeard.
That is just so wrong coming from stretched neckbeard.
heccibiggs
+0 -0
Seriously, the aspect ratio on that thing makes me physically sick.
Seriously, the aspect ratio on that thing makes me physically sick.
daidai
+0 -0
That thing just makes me sick. Fuck the ratio.
That thing just makes me sick. Fuck the ratio.
chuvak
+0 -0
hey, it was the best I could do. I'm not made of diodes!
hey, it was the best I could do. I'm not made of diodes!
thorfinn
+0 -0
It was not the best you could do, the best you could do would be to change your avatar and spare us all the sight of that horrible distorted neckbeard.
It was not the best you could do, the best you could do would be to change your avatar and spare us all the sight of that horrible distorted neckbeard.
baryonyx
+8 -0
Mr. Teal.
On the laptop.
With a diskette.
Mr. Teal.
On the laptop.
With a diskette.
hamscout
+1 -0
HamScout.
In the reply field.
With a virtual chubby.
HamScout.
In the reply field.
With a virtual chubby.
spinynorman
+0 -0
This is sort of what I thought. "Onstad has fashioned a beautifully retarded Agatha Christie plot." Right down to the quiet latch.
This is sort of what I thought. "Onstad has fashioned a beautifully retarded Agatha Christie plot." Right down to the quiet latch.
baryonyx
+0 -0
Spinynorman to hear you overlook the Clue reference I would believe you were never a child.
Spinynorman to hear you overlook the Clue reference I would believe you were never a child.
qingofchina
+0 -0
Cornelius forgot that plastic is flammable and that police don't care if you delete a program.
Cornelius forgot that plastic is flammable and that police don't care if you delete a program.
wittyname
+0 -0
A comment left by wittyname was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by invidious, Paco, DougTheHead, Comrade_Tom)
A comment left by wittyname was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by invidious, Paco, DougTheHead, Comrade_Tom)
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Old people know plenty, Keith Richards is an old person, as is Robert DeNiro, and indeed Nelson Mandela.
Grand empassioned statement:Us lot in the West should stop bitching about our old people and start bitching about the fact we let freddie Highmore make more motherfucking movies.
Old people know plenty, Keith Richards is an old person, as is Robert DeNiro, and indeed Nelson Mandela.
Grand empassioned statement:Us lot in the West should stop bitching about our old people and start bitching about the fact we let freddie Highmore make more motherfucking movies.
megamummy
+0 -0
A comment left by megamummy was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, Thorfinn, kendieatsbabies)
A comment left by megamummy was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by tekende, Thorfinn, kendieatsbabies)
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
basically, man, do not use html.
and i (we?) would thank you if you did not impugn Connie's honor even now in this troubled time!
basically, man, do not use html.
and i (we?) would thank you if you did not impugn Connie's honor even now in this troubled time!
wotown
+0 -1
A diskette with a bullet in it ain't exactly 5 o'clock news.
A diskette with a bullet in it ain't exactly 5 o'clock news.
epicurus
+5 -0
When I saw the first panel of this one my left eye just quietly fell out of its socket and rolled under the couch.
When I saw the first panel of this one my left eye just quietly fell out of its socket and rolled under the couch.
ethelthefrog
+0 -0
If I had one more chubby to give, it would be yours.
If I had one more chubby to give, it would be yours.
chachibenji
+0 -0
Outsauced by a computerized birdie with an unnatural sense for the honey.
Waaaacky.
Outsauced by a computerized birdie with an unnatural sense for the honey.
Waaaacky.
toiletstore
+0 -0
Panel six may be my favorite Ray panel to date.
Panel six may be my favorite Ray panel to date.
mindbnder
+1 -0
sequence of events this morning:
got to work
did some work
opened browser
began to type 'a...c...h'
pressed tab to autocomplete
saw first panel
laughed like a crazy man
minimized browser
closed office door
maximized browser
continued laughing
for fifteen minutes
read other panels
still laughing.
boss is mad.
sequence of events this morning:
got to work
did some work
opened browser
began to type 'a...c...h'
pressed tab to autocomplete
saw first panel
laughed like a crazy man
minimized browser
closed office door
maximized browser
continued laughing
for fifteen minutes
read other panels
still laughing.
boss is mad.
ihmgard
+0 -0
I think everyone is forgetting that this is cornelius. these fine policemen will talk to cornelius briefly and then realize that cornelius is not the kind of bear who looks at a small boys penis. Mr Teal is going to get a stern glare on the way home....a STERN glare
I think everyone is forgetting that this is cornelius. these fine policemen will talk to cornelius briefly and then realize that cornelius is not the kind of bear who looks at a small boys penis. Mr Teal is going to get a stern glare on the way home....a STERN glare
nice-on-water
+0 -0
Or we'll be led down a veritable rabbit hole of mistaken identity, MacGuffins, treachery, and chase scenes for 3 weeks, which I prefer.
Or we'll be led down a veritable rabbit hole of mistaken identity, MacGuffins, treachery, and chase scenes for 3 weeks, which I prefer.
farqussus
+0 -0
The Shrovis is going to find itself getting intimate with Cornelius' friend, Gray Nicolls.
The Shrovis is going to find itself getting intimate with Cornelius' friend, Gray Nicolls.
kelissamunz
+0 -0
Ray is going to deal with this. He has been Paying Attention.
Ray is going to deal with this. He has been Paying Attention.
massialot
+0 -0
BETRAYAL!
BETRAYAL!
redmange
+0 -0
Just as planned
Just as planned
niggar
+2 -0
He's buryin' his kiddie porn, all 1.44 mb of it.
He's buryin' his kiddie porn, all 1.44 mb of it.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I wouldn't look at a bear dressed like that and not think he's anything BUT a pedophile.
I wouldn't look at a bear dressed like that and not think he's anything BUT a pedophile.
phy
+0 -0
He might be a motorist, but I think he needs a scarf and goggles.
He might be a motorist, but I think he needs a scarf and goggles.
eatmorekix
+0 -0
whoa dude, that sentence was way more confusing than it needed to be.
whoa dude, that sentence was way more confusing than it needed to be.
nice-on-water
+0 -0
I don't see why. Reverse syntax is fine if you not sound like Yoda do.
I don't see why. Reverse syntax is fine if you not sound like Yoda do.
tekende
+0 -0
If I saw a bear dressed like that in real life I would laugh for a very, very long time. Note I mean a real bear, not a hair gay man.
If I saw a bear dressed like that in real life I would laugh for a very, very long time. Note I mean a real bear, not a hair gay man.
heccibiggs
+0 -0
Was that a typo, or is there actually such a thing as a hair gay man? Because if so, I need to be knowing more about what that is right now.
Was that a typo, or is there actually such a thing as a hair gay man? Because if so, I need to be knowing more about what that is right now.
tekende
+0 -0
Huh? Oh, whoops!
I meant to say "hairy."
Huh? Oh, whoops!
I meant to say "hairy."
irondave
+0 -0
A hair gay man is man who is gay about hair. Former US Senator John Edwards, for example.
A hair gay man is man who is gay about hair. Former US Senator John Edwards, for example.
tekende
+0 -0
Hee hee! Oh, hee hee hee!
Hee hee! Oh, hee hee hee!
hardelicious
+2 -0
Just last week I caught my grandfather cherishing a napkin long after he finished his meal of sandwiches.
Just last week I caught my grandfather cherishing a napkin long after he finished his meal of sandwiches.
cromar
+0 -0
Oh man I can't wait till tomorrow. There has to be a new one tomorrow. Please Mr. Onstad, may I have another?
Oh man I can't wait till tomorrow. There has to be a new one tomorrow. Please Mr. Onstad, may I have another?
desert_donkey
+0 -0
"Madness". lol. nothing is more British than a bunch of mods riding Vesas. he's just laying it on the Brits. Speaking of which, I was just talking with one. He seems to LOVE laying on the British expressions. He said "We do things PUCKER around here." I learned that "pucker" means 'correct'.
"Madness". lol. nothing is more British than a bunch of mods riding Vesas. he's just laying it on the Brits. Speaking of which, I was just talking with one. He seems to LOVE laying on the British expressions. He said "We do things PUCKER around here." I learned that "pucker" means 'correct'.
hatstand_mcq
+0 -0
Yes, and have you heard the Germans? They seem to LOVE talking German. And what about those Chinese?
Yes, and have you heard the Germans? They seem to LOVE talking German. And what about those Chinese?
catgrl131
+0 -1
ALL CHING-CHONG WING-WONG!
Oh god assetbar im so sorry i dindnt mean to ill never do it again PLEASE ASSETBAR NOT THE BUCKLE!
ALL CHING-CHONG WING-WONG!
Oh god assetbar im so sorry i dindnt mean to ill never do it again PLEASE ASSETBAR NOT THE BUCKLE!
theguitarhero
+2 -0
you can lame this if you want, but I finally finished the archive.
you can lame this if you want, but I finally finished the archive.
cromar
+0 -0
Feels good, eh?
Feels good, eh?
alreadyinuse
+0 -0
Did I mention I have a script for that.. ?
Did I mention I have a script for that.. ?
theguitarhero
+0 -0
It feels hell of good. It only took me about a week and a half because I'm studying for exams and I had to get my wisdom teeth pulled today.
It feels hell of good. It only took me about a week and a half because I'm studying for exams and I had to get my wisdom teeth pulled today.
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
I may have to get that as well, were they impacted? My mouth is to small to have wisdom teeth.
I may have to get that as well, were they impacted? My mouth is to small to have wisdom teeth.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
There were incredibly impacted. One was all the way up in my sinus cavity.
There were incredibly impacted. One was all the way up in my sinus cavity.
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
Yeah, I'm pretty much expecting to go back to the dentist any time now.
Yeah, I'm pretty much expecting to go back to the dentist any time now.
schroduck
+0 -0
What the hell kind of computer comes with a floppy disk drive these days anyway? Then again, I can imagine Shrovis-Bishopthorpe has no trust for those darned "Euessbe" Memory Twig thingys, and finding DE-9 flash memory is hard .
What the hell kind of computer comes with a floppy disk drive these days anyway? Then again, I can imagine Shrovis-Bishopthorpe has no trust for those darned "Euessbe" Memory Twig thingys, and finding DE-9 flash memory is hard .
invidious
+0 -0
Everyone talks about "Tron," but for me Cornelius' getup reminds me of "The City of Lost Children."
Great, I will have a finch stealing honey from my dreams tonight.
Everyone talks about "Tron," but for me Cornelius' getup reminds me of "The City of Lost Children."
Great, I will have a finch stealing honey from my dreams tonight.
autrepoupee
+0 -0
welcome to my nightmare world
welcome to my nightmare world
alreadyinuse
+0 -0
true - hell the Achewood strip it's self is sometimes surreal, fantastic, and dystopian in a fashion reminiscent of La Cité Des Enfants Perdus. We assetbar users are perhaps like so many brains trapped in a jar, a jerry-rigged ASCII connection our only desperate light in an otherwise obscure existence, trapped in some maniacal artist's sinister plot to extract the seeds of our creativity... Oh why, Onstad, WHY!?!?
true - hell the Achewood strip it's self is sometimes surreal, fantastic, and dystopian in a fashion reminiscent of La Cité Des Enfants Perdus. We assetbar users are perhaps like so many brains trapped in a jar, a jerry-rigged ASCII connection our only desperate light in an otherwise obscure existence, trapped in some maniacal artist's sinister plot to extract the seeds of our creativity... Oh why, Onstad, WHY!?!?
hamscout
+0 -0
Interesting... And then he begat Assetbar, which allowed him to plug our vision cord into his own eyes, so our eyes could see what he sees--ourselves--as he slowly killed us...
I LOVE THAT MOVIE! "mon petite frere"
Interesting... And then he begat Assetbar, which allowed him to plug our vision cord into his own eyes, so our eyes could see what he sees--ourselves--as he slowly killed us...
I LOVE THAT MOVIE! "mon petite frere"
i_love_kate
+0 -0
That hat, for reasons that I cannot adequately explain, puts me in mind of some kind of weird, futuristic, double-action breast milk pump.
That hat, for reasons that I cannot adequately explain, puts me in mind of some kind of weird, futuristic, double-action breast milk pump.
dapooka
+13 -2
Firstly, my feelings on the strip: Oh Hell no. Tell me that didn't happen. I'm really enjoying this arc.
Secondly, on finally catching up to the real date:
I always do this. Once a strip has penetrated the mush that I call a brain enough for me to actually pay attention to it, I go back and read the archives from the beginning.
This time though it was a little different, thanks to a lil' thing called Assetbar. I usually ignore forums about comics, mainly because they're a click away and not visible on the same page.
But dammit, y'all are right there. Right there, man. So I start reading.
A virtual year later (about 2 weeks real time) I register an account and go back through what I've read, simply to deliver chubbies and lames. That's all I'm doing. That's all I'm going to do, I tell myself.
Then, of course, slowly I start posting. Sure, I'm 7 months behind everyone else and no one will read the damn things, but I'm posting regardless.
The intelligence of the average Achewood poster (or at least the regulars - you know who you are) is enough to draw me in again and again, not couting the few idiots out there ( you don't know who you are, but everyone else does and mocks you terribly for it, much to the enjoyment of the rest of us).
So now at the end of it the Achewood experience isn't complete unless I flip through Assetbar to see what people have posted. And since the comments have averaged about 500 since the beginning of this year, that%u2019s made the last 3-4 months go Hell of slow .
Anyways I feel like I know you, and you don%u2019t know who the hell I am. That may change. But I thought you people should know that now you all are a part of the zeitgeist of Achewood to me. This is a thing.
Thank you for your time, and I doubt I%u2019ll be this long or this nice to everyone again.
Disclaimer: This long, fawning spam is directed to the people using Assetbar, and in no way towards the actual Assetbar itself. Preemptively anticipating Assetbar turning my BBcode to hash, I will say now what others have said before: Screw you Assetbar. Fuck you.
Firstly, my feelings on the strip: Oh Hell no. Tell me that didn't happen. I'm really enjoying this arc.
Secondly, on finally catching up to the real date:
I always do this. Once a strip has penetrated the mush that I call a brain enough for me to actually pay attention to it, I go back and read the archives from the beginning.
This time though it was a little different, thanks to a lil' thing called Assetbar. I usually ignore forums about comics, mainly because they're a click away and not visible on the same page.
But dammit, y'all are right there. Right there, man. So I start reading.
A virtual year later (about 2 weeks real time) I register an account and go back through what I've read, simply to deliver chubbies and lames. That's all I'm doing. That's all I'm going to do, I tell myself.
Then, of course, slowly I start posting. Sure, I'm 7 months behind everyone else and no one will read the damn things, but I'm posting regardless.
The intelligence of the average Achewood poster (or at least the regulars - you know who you are) is enough to draw me in again and again, not couting the few idiots out there ( you don't know who you are, but everyone else does and mocks you terribly for it, much to the enjoyment of the rest of us).
So now at the end of it the Achewood experience isn't complete unless I flip through Assetbar to see what people have posted. And since the comments have averaged about 500 since the beginning of this year, that%u2019s made the last 3-4 months go Hell of slow .
Anyways I feel like I know you, and you don%u2019t know who the hell I am. That may change. But I thought you people should know that now you all are a part of the zeitgeist of Achewood to me. This is a thing.
Thank you for your time, and I doubt I%u2019ll be this long or this nice to everyone again.
Disclaimer: This long, fawning spam is directed to the people using Assetbar, and in no way towards the actual Assetbar itself. Preemptively anticipating Assetbar turning my BBcode to hash, I will say now what others have said before: Screw you Assetbar. Fuck you.
baryonyx
+1 -0
Ah, to be a young Acheworlder again.
Dialogues are still carried on in all corners of the archive. Your comments will not go unread, oh no indeed.
Ah, to be a young Acheworlder again.
Dialogues are still carried on in all corners of the archive. Your comments will not go unread, oh no indeed.
heccibiggs
+0 -0
Yeah man, I'm re-reading the archives right now, and reading the comments for every strip, so if anyone's still posting, I'll see it and have an opinion on it, and maybe, if you're really lucky, even reply to it.
Yeah man, I'm re-reading the archives right now, and reading the comments for every strip, so if anyone's still posting, I'll see it and have an opinion on it, and maybe, if you're really lucky, even reply to it.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
I remember that the only reason I got an account was because I was curious as to what Asherdan's lamed out posts read. Having initially complained about the lame/censorship system, I have slowly realized that this is all part of Assetbar's plan to draw in more people. Also, for someone who planned to destroy Assetbar in favor of the old messageboard, Asherdan has indirectly drawn more users than he could have imagined. How delightfully ironic.
Anyway, welcome.
I remember that the only reason I got an account was because I was curious as to what Asherdan's lamed out posts read. Having initially complained about the lame/censorship system, I have slowly realized that this is all part of Assetbar's plan to draw in more people. Also, for someone who planned to destroy Assetbar in favor of the old messageboard, Asherdan has indirectly drawn more users than he could have imagined. How delightfully ironic.
Anyway, welcome.
dapooka
+0 -0
Oh I've been lurking for a while now, at least it seems to me. But thanks anyway.
And yeah - the whole Asherdan thing definitely piqued my curiosity, though that was hardly the only reason I registered.
Oh I've been lurking for a while now, at least it seems to me. But thanks anyway.
And yeah - the whole Asherdan thing definitely piqued my curiosity, though that was hardly the only reason I registered.
hamscout
+0 -0
I am drawn to the comments almost as much as the strip itself. I'm trying to catch up with the comments of 'yore, but it's slow going.
I've also found myself boning up on my Photoshop skills just to make silly jokes for the regulars, waiting with terrified expectation to see if I made someone, anyone laugh, like SO many of these people have made me laugh. (I wonder if this could translate to 'graphic design' credits for night school...)
It's a silly little thing, but it's a group of very diverse individuals, with VERY disparate backgrounds. It's simultaneously my closest group of high school friends AND a virtual Benetton of tastes/experiences/backgrounds...
...and oh fuck I'm gushing. Bloody wanker.
I love you, Achewood community! *Huuuuuugs!*
I am drawn to the comments almost as much as the strip itself. I'm trying to catch up with the comments of 'yore, but it's slow going.
I've also found myself boning up on my Photoshop skills just to make silly jokes for the regulars, waiting with terrified expectation to see if I made someone, anyone laugh, like SO many of these people have made me laugh. (I wonder if this could translate to 'graphic design' credits for night school...)
It's a silly little thing, but it's a group of very diverse individuals, with VERY disparate backgrounds. It's simultaneously my closest group of high school friends AND a virtual Benetton of tastes/experiences/backgrounds...
...and oh fuck I'm gushing. Bloody wanker.
I love you, Achewood community! *Huuuuuugs!*
pogo
+1 -0
Where's Lyle? I'll hold you while he punches you in the gut.
Where's Lyle? I'll hold you while he punches you in the gut.
catgrl131
+0 -0
Okay, I feel you must know this. I was reading your comment, and then I got up to "I've also found myself boning..." and I just got a mental picture of you (Generic Dude) just goin' about your business, and all of a sudden, "Well what's all this then? How'd that happen?" Or possibly maybe you were gettin' it on hella asleep style, and you woke up to find youself bonin'.
That is all.
Okay, I feel you must know this. I was reading your comment, and then I got up to "I've also found myself boning..." and I just got a mental picture of you (Generic Dude) just goin' about your business, and all of a sudden, "Well what's all this then? How'd that happen?" Or possibly maybe you were gettin' it on hella asleep style, and you woke up to find youself bonin'.
That is all.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
a friend of mine was taking some type of medication and it induced somnambulism and once upon a time she and her girlfriend were getting mad rutty and she woke up in the midst of it. asleep style to the max.
a friend of mine was taking some type of medication and it induced somnambulism and once upon a time she and her girlfriend were getting mad rutty and she woke up in the midst of it. asleep style to the max.
achilleselbow
+0 -0
Was the medication called Cuervo? I heard chicks will do ANYTHING on Cuervo!
Was the medication called Cuervo? I heard chicks will do ANYTHING on Cuervo!
invidious
+0 -0
THEY'LL EVEN LEZ OUT!! (virtual chubby)
THEY'LL EVEN LEZ OUT!! (virtual chubby)
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
well, see, they were already lesbians...
so...
well, see, they were already lesbians...
so...
tekende
+0 -0
That sounds awesome.
That sounds awesome.
spinynorman
+0 -0
That is a completely great story in every way.
That is a completely great story in every way.
i_love_kate
+0 -0
Just about the best story ever.
Just about the best story ever.
comrade_tom
+0 -0
Ah Neoroticism: the internets oxygen.
I scoff but theres nothing quite like amusing or being amused by some utterly anonymous person on the other side of a series of tubes.
Ah Neoroticism: the internets oxygen.
I scoff but theres nothing quite like amusing or being amused by some utterly anonymous person on the other side of a series of tubes.
pogo
+0 -0
Welcome. I'm fairly new to Assetbar, but found the strip long before there were comments. It was hella lonely back then. I thought I was going insane, laughing alone at these demented animal antics, only my baby brother to share them with. Now it's like being in a large village of idiots. Still gotta get all the way through the archives (at this point I'm about Sept. 2005, commenting away) .
Welcome. I'm fairly new to Assetbar, but found the strip long before there were comments. It was hella lonely back then. I thought I was going insane, laughing alone at these demented animal antics, only my baby brother to share them with. Now it's like being in a large village of idiots. Still gotta get all the way through the archives (at this point I'm about Sept. 2005, commenting away) .
daidai
+0 -0
Am I an idiot?
HOW WILL I KNOW?
Am I an idiot?
HOW WILL I KNOW?
drskradley
+1 -0
I am happy to be the one to give you your first ever V-Chub. It's value goes up and down depending on the market that day, and I think they dropped a few points recently, but here, it's yours.
Salutations, and stay well. Or something. I really can't think of anything oh fuck me this is so embarrassing NO
Hi! You can have my babies NO
YOU SUCK SO MUCH HOW DARE YOU BE SO ARROGANT NO
Welcome.
I am happy to be the one to give you your first ever V-Chub. It's value goes up and down depending on the market that day, and I think they dropped a few points recently, but here, it's yours.
Welcome.
dapooka
+0 -0
As erudite as expected, Skradley!
I must admit I posted not even thinking/caring of chubbies or lames and I find it amusing that so far I've received 2 lames on a post that was basically nothing but compliments for the Acheworld community.
I guess these people don't know who they are.
As erudite as expected, Skradley!
I must admit I posted not even thinking/caring of chubbies or lames and I find it amusing that so far I've received 2 lames on a post that was basically nothing but compliments for the Acheworld community.
I guess these people don't know who they are.
noah_j
+0 -0
the diskette drive has a latch ?
shrovis-bishopthorpe has thought of everything .
the diskette drive has a latch ?
shrovis-bishopthorpe has thought of everything .
thorfinn
+0 -0
Not all floppy drives are like the ones on these fancy, new-fangled 486s, with the 133 MHz processor and 4 MB of ram. Latch-type mechanisms were standard on 5.25" floppy drives, such as would use the style diskette that Cornelius is burying. You would place the diskette into the slot, then flip a switch or latch mechanism to actually move the motor and reading equipment up to the disk, holding it in place and allowing the drive to read it.
Not all floppy drives are like the ones on these fancy, new-fangled 486s, with the 133 MHz processor and 4 MB of ram. Latch-type mechanisms were standard on 5.25" floppy drives, such as would use the style diskette that Cornelius is burying. You would place the diskette into the slot, then flip a switch or latch mechanism to actually move the motor and reading equipment up to the disk, holding it in place and allowing the drive to read it.
noah_j
+0 -0
i hate that i already knew that... having had one of those at some point in the past.
oh memory! i bet old people cherish you.
i hate that i already knew that... having had one of those at some point in the past.
oh memory! i bet old people cherish you.
opprobrium
+0 -0
did cornelius catch ray in the middle of the chicken dance?
did cornelius catch ray in the middle of the chicken dance?
hayzeus
+1 -0
Damn you, Onstadt!
My name is Noland and I live on the Northside of my city and country!
...
Who's that knocking at my door!
Damn you, Onstadt!
My name is Noland and I live on the Northside of my city and country!
...
Who's that knocking at my door!
hayzeus
+1 -0
Shit, the fuzz!
Bury the hats!
Also the children!
Shit, the fuzz!
Bury the hats!
Also the children!
tbtabby
+1 -0
"Are you Ed Flanders?"
"No, NED Flanders."
"Are you Ed Flanders?"
"No, NED Flanders."
thorfinn
+0 -0
Who's that, who's that knockin'
Who's that knockin' at my chamber door
Mister, Mister Raven
All up in my grill like "Nevermore"
Who's that, who's that knockin'
Who's that knockin' at my chamber door
Mister, Mister Raven
All up in my grill like "Nevermore"
pursesnatcher
+0 -0
connie, we've all been there.
connie, we've all been there.
grombly
+0 -0
for someone that complains about "pakis" it came somewhat as a surprise that keith enjoyed music from the twotone movement
for someone that complains about "pakis" it came somewhat as a surprise that keith enjoyed music from the twotone movement
salfordladsclub
+0 -0
Not even dude. Skins loved ska. Or at least madness. Slightly depressing really.
Not even dude. Skins loved ska. Or at least madness. Slightly depressing really.
norrin
+1 -1
Sorry to "spam" but I just saw this and wish someone had showed it to me before. https://xkcd.com/141/
Sorry to "spam" but I just saw this and wish someone had showed it to me before. https://xkcd.com/141/
numberkillinger
+1 -0
It is a perfect... parody!
It is a perfect... parody!
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
Oh man, chubby for hooking me up with the Lucid TV. I'm looking at it now, also a chubby for the venture brothers name.
it returns in june...
Oh man, chubby for hooking me up with the Lucid TV. I'm looking at it now, also a chubby for the venture brothers name.
it returns in june...
norrin
+0 -0
That show has produced some of the greatest names of all time; Catclops, Girl Hitler, etc. I know I am missing some great ones.
That show has produced some of the greatest names of all time; Catclops, Girl Hitler, etc. I know I am missing some great ones.
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
Manic eightball, mister monday, the intangible fancy, dr septapus, tiny joseph Jackon Publicks blog is pretty good. It does have some spoilers mind...
Manic eightball, mister monday, the intangible fancy, dr septapus, tiny joseph Jackon Publicks blog is pretty good. It does have some spoilers mind...
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
Who didnt fuck up BBCode just there? Me, it was me
Who didnt fuck up BBCode just there? Me, it was me
iseedeadpixels
+0 -0
How could I forget Nat King Cobra???
How could I forget Nat King Cobra???
heccibiggs
+0 -0
That would be totally fantastic if they hadn't put in the bit about Beef setting up the GOF so Ray would win. That didn't sit well with me for some reason. Other than that bit, wicked parody.
That would be totally fantastic if they hadn't put in the bit about Beef setting up the GOF so Ray would win. That didn't sit well with me for some reason. Other than that bit, wicked parody.
norrin
+0 -0
I think he meant he was setting Ray up so he , not Ray, could win it, but in the end he decided he could not take Ray down.
I actualy thought it was a cool twist.
I think he meant he was setting Ray up so he , not Ray, could win it, but in the end he decided he could not take Ray down.
I actualy thought it was a cool twist.
synapse
+1 -0
I think maybe Cornelius has his own Bensington Butters now.
I think maybe Cornelius has his own Bensington Butters now.
mikeleffel2
+0 -0
brolliant, which is a cousin to brilliant. i said this.
brolliant, which is a cousin to brilliant. i said this.
baryonyx
+0 -0
The third row down smacks of Poe.
The third row down smacks of Poe.
maximus
+0 -1
So Cornelius finds out Ray killed Mr. Nolan and hides the body to protect Phillipe and decides to take the rap and go to jail as Northside.
So Cornelius finds out Ray killed Mr. Nolan and hides the body to protect Phillipe and decides to take the rap and go to jail as Northside.
maximus
+0 -0
sorry, Ray hid the body and discloses the fact to Cornelius in his holding cell.
sorry, Ray hid the body and discloses the fact to Cornelius in his holding cell.
ihmgard
+0 -0
I didn't notice this the first time through but panel 8 is really quite amazing. Just the way the perspective and the lighting are presented gives you a real sense of foreboding.
I didn't notice this the first time through but panel 8 is really quite amazing. Just the way the perspective and the lighting are presented gives you a real sense of foreboding.
sparhawk
+0 -0
As ever, something surprisingly tender and heartwarming has swiftly developed into something strange and forbidding, if not frightening.
Chris-motherfucking-Onstad, man.
As ever, something surprisingly tender and heartwarming has swiftly developed into something strange and forbidding, if not frightening.
Chris-motherfucking-Onstad, man.
theguitarhero
+0 -0
It's funny, Bear has gone from accusing others of buggering little children to being accused himself of buggering little children.
Ironic twist? NOLAN'S REVENGE?
It's funny, Bear has gone from accusing others of buggering little children to being accused himself of buggering little children.
Ironic twist? NOLAN'S REVENGE?
comrade_tom
+0 -0
We are but "puppets dallying" when it comes to the long in the fruition schemes of cyber perverts.
We are but "puppets dallying" when it comes to the long in the fruition schemes of cyber perverts.
radchilies
+0 -0
Onstad is currently sitting pretty at number 112 on Amazon!
Congratulations, Chris. You have the 112th most popular book in the country. At the moment.
Onstad is currently sitting pretty at number 112 on Amazon!
Congratulations, Chris. You have the 112th most popular book in the country. At the moment.
bixschmix
+0 -0
I just ordered it! Now the waiting begins.
I just ordered it! Now the waiting begins.
johnnyrocker
+0 -0
I like how Connie's hat has ear coverers in the regular, human place in addition to his bear-ear-coverers.
Man that as a stupid sentence.
I like how Connie's hat has ear coverers in the regular, human place in addition to his bear-ear-coverers.
Man that as a stupid sentence.
nsam543
+0 -0
"Keith is in the toilet listening to Madness now"
And I thought I was the only one who does that... SWEET.
"Keith is in the toilet listening to Madness now"
And I thought I was the only one who does that... SWEET.
mrfedora
+0 -0
I am always in favor of hats. For any and all reasons.
I am always in favor of hats. For any and all reasons.
cpnglxynchos
+0 -0
how fun!
how fun!
vihil
+0 -0
Cornelius drives an imported car, evidently. That is class .
Cornelius drives an imported car, evidently. That is class .
hausea
+0 -0
Oh man. Oh man. I want that hat so bad. I would totally pay hard cash for a Victorian Hearing Hat.
Oh man. Oh man. I want that hat so bad. I would totally pay hard cash for a Victorian Hearing Hat.
I knew Mr. Teal was setting Cornelius up right from the start. Never trust a finch.
So you're saying instead of loading the diskette with Keith, he loaded it with hot tub shots of Lil Nephew's joint and unguarded letters from Philippe?
It's possible. Not to mention whatever the hell else Nolan looks up. Tigers giving birth and shit. *
But also - why would he have to bury it? It's a diskette, you can just break it or burn it or something why in the hell am I picking this story apart I feel less of a man
*Oh sweet damn I just had an image of Lyle giving birth. We can all imagine it. He has a bottle of Jack in hand, and he's possibly throwing up at the same time.
Projectile vomiting, Dr. Skradley. He has standards.
Projectile birthing.
THREE FEET
You cannot leave a diskette documenting cyber murder unburied just as you cannot leave a bepickled bed sheet un-shot in the desert. Dirty business etiquette, dontchaknow.
Haha skradly, I love when you comment and right in the middle of the comment you break down and figure out is was all for naught.
I notice these things
"Did you see that? I just gave birth to a baby that weighs twelve pounds. That doesn't happen by not caring."
God Damn you Mr. Teal, I knew you couldn't trust the sort of bird that would plan to break the First Law of Assistance.
If Cornelius knew more about computers he could have suggested right up front that they could simply put Keith's body in the "Recycle Bin." That's what it's for!
no. wrong OS. he slides him into the Trash Can and selects 'secure empty trash'.
Keith's zeros and ones all getting shredded and torn from each other as Mr. Teal fills the screen with [MANIACAL LAUGHTER] and repeated SOD OFF s.
Wouldn't that be the Rubbish Bin?
i suppose so.
or " Heap, depending.
[IMGS OFF]
I did that instead of looking for a job
i reply to you instead of shoveling snow from my driveway.
That was ten times more constructive than half the things I have done instead of looking for a job.
I looked at that instead of working. The cosmic balance is restored.
I looked at it while working.
The circle is complete.
The circle will be complete when you lose your job for looking at it instead of working, and jbushnell then gets your job.
May the circle be unbroken.
My name is Russell Faraday, and I have come to civilize you people.
And the circle begins anew.
I read this while feigning working. Does that count?
[IMGS OFF]
THIS IS HOW I FEEL ABOUT YOUR IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOUR
Virtual chubby.
VChub for you.
And another.
REAL chubby!
TAKIN IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL
I wish I could remember what image this post used to contain.
truth.
The only way this could possibly be improved is if the rubbish bin went "Nooo!" as well.
A comment left by snail was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Dovey, straw, jlaw, Norsef, biomusicologist, RaysDangNachos, rudegrrl, falseprophet, HSE, catgrl131, Tagrineth, DougTheHead, Miku224, aHatOfPig, shortside40, cathaoir, vorrishnikov, nutmeg, Xaxx, Combustache, NumberKillinger, buckster, peterjoel, pogo)
You are receiving no lame only because I have used up my lame allotment and Assetbar says I should do something nice for a change. Had I known the depths to which your lameness could reach, I would have held lames back from several comments which, while lame, were far less deserving than yours.
resist the urge to reply or lame AT ALL
Like blood clots? They're pretty good I guess, otherwise you'd just bleed to death.
A comment left by daidai was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Jordstar, blastradius, MrFlunchy, perhapsmaybe, jmmfgd, motts)
A comment left by theirateturk was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, zumicroom, biomusicologist, blastradius, falseprophet, rascaldom, robbingdog, farqussus, DrSkradley, cathaoir, Frankreich)
A comment left by blastradius was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, sirhan_duran, Deusoma, wittyname, rascaldom)
A comment left by theirateturk was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, biomusicologist, NeoNaoNeo, falseprophet, HSE, farqussus, DrSkradley, fairwinds, Frankreich)
A comment left by neonfreon was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, falseprophet, atticusonline, aHatOfPig)
it makes sense, i agree. :0)
<@:-P
(-:3
I forgot assetbar's hatred of plus signs. Now it looks like an ass-head.
It appears that at least 37 people, myself included got it. Were you one of the 6 who did not, blastradius?
I doubt anyone lamed due to a lack of comprehension. That is just a tired, tired joke.
Well I woke its ass up
Mr. PNDT (Psychedelic Neon Dancing Tyrannosaur), I frequently chubby you for your icon regardless of your post. Just... just thought you should know.
I have noticed this trend. I've gotten chubbies for my "v-chub" posts, which doesn't make any sense at all.
Late at night, I lie awake, and wonder if I should change my avatar. I know it's earning me chubbies that I don't deserve. But... but... maybe I earned all of those chubbies by picking the right avatar? I toss and turn, but in the end, I simply love the PNDT too much to change my avatar.
But maybe I've gotten another account so I can travel through assetbar, posting comments unnoticed and unchubbied. Maybe...
this makes me wonder exactly how many other regular posters here have alternate accounts for this reason alone.
If I look a fool in front of the internet I don't know what I will do goddammit.
v-chubbed
I know I'm busy chubbying you for your GSYBE album cover.
i feel so smart for knowing what that stands for.
I've personally often wondered if Onstad himself has an anonymous account so as to intermingle with us. It's possible, but I hope not for his sake. I really hope he doesn't read the individual things we say at all . That's exactly the sorta thing to throw you off your game.
By writing this, I've pretty much solidified that I'm not Onstad in disguise. Or was it a double-fake to make you think that....?
If he does, it can't be one of the regulars/frequent posters. Dude has enough trouble keeping up with 4 strips a week without devoting this much time to hastily photoshopped images and arguments about irony.
I doubt it, I've read in places that he doesn't really like mingling which is fair enough considering what most people are like.
I can't help but think that Chris is possibly "Retardo" "Manflesh" or "Asherdan"
Oh god, my mind would be
Boned?
richardbachman69
I think there are a lot of people out there who have gotten a lot of enjoyment out of getting baked and staring at your avatar for houuuurs... . As a result, chubbies have ensued...
Is he listening to Love Shack?
It's a prat?
None of you seem to be able to spell "Tarp".. shame on you!
A comment left by straw was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Thorfinn, NeoNaoNeo, Marcus_Brody, mania3, Ihmgard, opprobrium, Combustache)
A picture is worth a thousand lames.
"This is what happens when you mess with Honey, Cornelius. I am so sorry it had to end this way"
A comment left by biff was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by straw, Thorfinn, nabeel84, blastradius, NeoNaoNeo, synnah, fell, flazisismuss, sassacrass, zaratustra, GMM, Marcus_Brody, sneechles, abendsonnen, smugairle, unityrolf, shoethings, perhapsmaybe, hardelicious, echidnaboy)
Jesus fucking christ someone told me about this anomalous baby a mere three hours ago . I didn't have the heart to go looking for it and now it has come to me .
OK, I am officially a twisted bastard.
19 lames so far. Not exactly the response I was expecting.
Just out of curiosity.... what response were you expecting when you decided to post the picture of the two-headed baby?
AHEM technically it has one head and two faces . I just want to be clear on that point before somebody makes a play on words from a faulty foundation, e.g. "you're right, he really should have used his heads," when what they should be going for is something more on the order of "all those lames--he's really losing a lot of face."
I realised my error immediately after posting. EGG ON MY FACES
The proper etiquette is to post a link and warn people not to look at the disturbing image of a two-headed baby.
So, there you go.
Much less disturbing now.
i think you should remove your head from the suppository position and then maybe then you wouldn't do things like this.
I wish I had not seen that. I did not lame you but I sure understand.
I AM LISTENING TO HEEEEAAR WHERE YOU AAAAAAAARRRRRRE
Put on Sunday shoes, and dance round the room to accordion keys
I just bought that album a month ago. I'm what people call "behind the curve" musically.
Lucky you. It's one of those rare things that is even better than you think it's going to be, and never gets old. It's still in my CD changer 4 years on.
What album are you talking about? I'm confused.
In The Aeroplane Over The Sea
the vinyl's so cheap and sooooooooo worth it, really you don't get the true experiance till you listen to it in record form.
Oh. Yeah, that's a good one. I used to have it on CD. Not vinyl, though, but I don't have a record player, so...yeah.
That means you're not cool.
I have it on vinyl now. And I have a record player. In fact, In the Aeroplane over the Sea was like the second or third record I purchased.
(The first record I purchased was Didn't It Rain by Songs Ohia. Great album.)
two headed babyyy.
all floating in glass
the sun it has passed
now it's blacker than black.
Damn! this is ace, having endured a long plane journey i return to some excellent achewoods and people quoting a favoured music ensemble of mine, what a delightfull turn up for the books!
i'm confused. i'm assuming that at one point your post contained a picture of that indian baby born with two faces. but now i see a picture of a two faced mr. teal... did you (or an admin) edit this post?
thanks in advance for telling me what happened!
The picture was stored on my web space. I deleted the first picture and put up the new picture with the same name.
Man why the hell did you cave to external pressure like that? Now I'm all curious to see it. Seriously where the hell do Assetbar users get off being so goddamn delicate? "Oh my, a two-headed baby, someone fetch me my smelling salts!" We've all seen tubgirl, we've all seen 2girls1cup, we've all seen lemonparty, so stop pretending to have some shred of decency left. Curiosity trumps all.
I was fine with the two faced baby. However, I will point out that though I have seen tubgirl, I have learned my Lesson of the Internet and have not seen 2girls1cup by my own choice.
NOT ALL OF US! WHAT IS LEMONPARTY? I NEED NAUSEA IN MY LIFE!
Your sentences are songs sung in the key of lie. Have you no curiosity? What if everyone's just been lying to you and it's actually like the best porno you'll ever see, with the rudest titties? You cannot afford to take that risk.
As for lemonparty, all that requires is a quick google image search. You'll know it when you see it. Or you could just go to the site. I won't link to it here, but let's just say the domain name is straightforward, and it is apparently a nonprofit organization.
I also forgot to mention Goatse and Harlequin Fetus. I tend to think knowledge is always better than ignorance no matter what the subject, and I've yet to come across anything that I actually wished I hadn't seen.
There is an exception though, which is videos of animal cruelty. My girlfriend tried to send me that video of the Chinese woman stomping on a kitten with high heels (she watched a minute of it before stopping), but I tried to forget the very thought. Videos of cruelty to humans don't bother me as much for some reason, I think because there's always the possibility that it's an act or at the very least one has seen similar kinds of stuff acted out in movies.
Okay, so I've never seen 2 Girls 1 Cup, but I looked it up on Wikipedia and I have no desire to see the thing itself.
As for lemon party, you're lucky I like you; I did an image search for it and...yeah.
[IMGS OFF]
[IMGS OFF]
Lemonparty is beyond tame compared to every other shock meme. I don't even get why it gets mentioned in the same sentence, every time, as goatse, tubgirl, and swap.avi.
On the subject of internet memes cornellius' hat reminds me of the tron fellow.
What's swap.avi?
It is blindness, it is pain, it is suffering. It is the end of civilization as we know it. It is a thousand screaming suns, burning their heat and fury into your eyes. You cannot unsee SWAP.AVI anymore than you can cheat death, the death that you so desperately crave by its conclusion. There is no God, no Satan. Only SWAP.AVI.
It is apparently women crapping and puking onto and into each other. Although it is a 700MB file that you would basically need to seek out and download, so i'm not really sure why anyone has seen it. johnnyc can never forget.
I just read the Something Awful article .
You just had to bring up the harlequin thing, which I had the misfortune of seeing but did not want to mention. But now you have really upset me with that kitten-stomping video. That sort of thing is why I would not be upset by videos of cruelty to humans.
AchillesElbow, I gave you a chubby because we are internet twins. I feel the exact same way as you, shock pictures have never had much of an effect on me. After watching 2 girls 1 cup i was able to eat dinner, and I've seen goatse/tubgirl/lemonparty so many times I laugh when I see them. People have told me I'm fucked up for not thinking the pictures are gross, but I'm not fucked up. It just doesn't bother me.
But what bothers me?
Animal cruelty. Zippocat nauseates me, and I do not even DARE touch the heelstomp video. Cats especially get to me, as I'm a cat person. I still feel bad for the dogs though. As far as human cruelty/gore... i've laughed at a picture of a guy whose face was hanging off due to a shotgun blast, the picture itself superimposed with the words "I LOL'D."
High five for being desensitized dicks (and a pat on the back for me, since i basically just reworded your post)
I really didn't need to know about Zippocat, but ok. I think this dichotomy might be a common thing, because now that I think of it, there are more logical reasons. With the footage of people being executed or having their heads blown off, this is something that usually occurred on its own and was then documented by a third party, whereas with the animal videos, it was someone doing that just for the sake of taping it. Maybe I would be equally bothered by a snuff film that I definitely knew to be real, but I haven't tested this theory and have no particular desire to.
I've never seen 2girls1cup or tub girl or any of that shit. No lie. I think my life is better without them and, once you've seen them you cannot unsee them. I not that curious.
I have not seen those things.
I don't see it as caving to the pressure. Maybe it really is caving, but I choose a different interpretation.
I choose to interpret it as politeness. Personally I found it fascinating.
Here is this girl with some super-rare condition that gives her two faces. And in her culture she is revered because she is seen as a reincarnation of the goddess Durga. She will live a life of ease and adulation, not like the life of Joseph Merrick.
It frankly never occurred to me that people would be creeped out by the picture. The short-sightedness of that is clear to me now, thus the decision to remove the picture. (that, and the fact that I created the situation in such a way that I could change the picture.)
I actually looked this up, and the baby is actually pretty cute. Not really disturbing.
I know! It's got a cute little dimple!
I think that dimple is her ear.
I still haven't seen the picture, but I appreciate your choice to change it out of politeness. I liked that Assetbar is pretty much universally Safe For Work with the exception of occasional drawn cat cock. I see no pleasure in poking fun at human or animal suffering or genetic malformations, regardless of whether they are revered in their culture or not.
Except Funniest Home Videos and the like when toddlers fall on their face and cats wreck themselves, that shit is funny .
Frikkin' Funniest Home Videos is the cause of many squirrel deaths. Animal cruelty, dogg.
Did YOU replace the picture, or was it done by some benevolent higher power? Because I was so confused for a moment.
I want to know what possessed the Shrovis-Bishopthorpe engineers to install a 5-1/4" floppy drive in their laptop. Did they think to install USB ports? Where do you even buy 5-1/4" floppy diskettes these days? Where is the strip that has Cornelius asking Roast Beef for a 5-1/4" diskette? Because the only person in the neightbourhood likely to still have a few tucked away would be Roat Beef? Why would Mr. Teal request such a diskette rather than a USB thumb drive?
How could the Publican fit onto a 5-1/4" floppy? Exactly how much kiddie porn could you fit onto such a diskette?
This arc raises too many uncomfortable questions.
The Restless Spirit of Archaic Drives, Yes, Pawn Shops and Thrift Stores, frozen deep into the ice of Ganymede, because Mr. Teal is of Old Ways, it was a tight squeeze, but as he didn't have his shoes on he could just make the fit, and too much. Any amount is too much.
a thumb drive would have given Keith room to be comfortable. Mr. Teal wouldn't have that.
i think i remember 5-1/4" capacity being less than the hard-case floppy.
technology-related story--
my old IBM 386 had both floppy drives (and a 4x Sound Blaster CD Drive!) and was the replacement for our Tandy. we still have the Tandy's screen, which weighs a kabillion pounds and though it requires you to position such as a writing utensil in its power switch, it still works great. the colors are sharp and contrast superb.
The first 5-1/4" floppy drive could hold 98.5 KB per disk, later increased to 110 KB, and eventually 360 KB with the first "double density" drives by 1978. In the early '80s, the first "quad density" drives were created, enabling the storage of 720 KB per disk. In 1984, the first high-density disks were created, enabling the storage of an astounding 1200 KB of information, which was quite a lot, considering that hard drives at the time averaged 10-20 MB.
thanks, yo. yeah, did not feel like searching for the answer anywhere.
chubby'd for the exact fucking computer evolution at my old house. tandy to 386. they're all gone now.
i still have both. as well as my dad's old Apple IIc.
As well as polio and a falcon ?
no, suprisingly, as it is not a Fax.
Segreant! I've found something on this diskette! It's... oh my God... it looks like part of that missing publican! He's... he's been fragmented... BLAAARGH!
They sucked out his brains
Aided by Doogie Howser.
Sounds more like Vinnie Delpino's doing.
He's going to go all Ghost in the Machine!
"They skinned them....why did the guerillas skin them...???"
FUCK, your icon COMPLETELY ONE UPS MINE.
What's the goddamn use anymore.