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Gladdington Castle Monday, August 7, 2006 • read strip Viewing 75 comments:

What if you have two Ipods?

You would be almost as good as a gay guy with one iPod. Almost. Unless your iPod was gay.

Man I ain't got an iPod. I guess that means I have no cultural cachet at all. Unless I'm gay.

well it looks like you have about three years to wait until you find out

A comment left by numberkillinger was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by Spoon, redion, TonyHighwind, TheGreatestCape)

thank you.

Talk about a machine that basically has AIDS.

Fact: All iPods are gay.

It's science!

There you go, man! Straight up saying science for the man on the go.

No.

You would still be soundly defeated by someone who was Double Gay.

i.e. ... straight?

Double gay is what happens when someone raised by two dads turns gay both naturally and from his upbringing. The two dads sometimes have a hard time learning and accepting that their son is double gay.

Queeeeeeeeeeeer...

That is probably how I will use MY dying breath.

But you're not a king...

...are you?

....King piss.

Considering that I'm a robotic engineer I'll probably use my dying breath like "the green wire's connected to the TX, the black wire is connected to the ground plug, the red wire's connected to the *BZZT* *POP* *ssssssssssssss*" and yes, I will be singing this to the tune of dem bones .

Aaaaaarthur!

Extended vowels sing of feather boas, hand lotions, and sensible purchases of scented candles.

Damn, you beat me to it!

By, like, a year. So, no contest, really.

A comment left by retardo was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by ted0phile, Dovey, AndrewofDOOM, straw, Norsef, jthm_guitarist, apocowarg, zcross00, sorcerouswolf, cherojack, riotdejaneiro, jlynes, goatmasterflash, Overmedicated, Thorfinn, redion, Jesler729, tibcoolbreeze, SchnappM, DeimosRising, wjon, totoro23, goocifer, anticitizen, bug, Spenham, mtrott, Tagrineth, 762, Sargasm, Vee, prettyrad, DrSkradley, Lumus, mira, fattypneumonia, smugairle, mistlethrush, hannah, Breadcrab, aesop_punk, davidadam, mystkmanat, Afkpuz, goslingone, suprememongoose, nutmeg, dj_insomniac, TheGreatestCape, SeanBad, smilebuddha, Epicurus, scraggg, lastlarf, Arcibi, stormagnet, slalvation, gkiyo, Rakadin, nickb285)

no, dude! what? no!

nooooOOOO

... Man, I have been wondering what Retardo has been saying all this time to get everyone to hate him, and now I'm just kinda disappointed. I hope you're happy :<

Yeah, before I made this here account and just lurked, there was always such an air of mystery about them.

Jelouse? Is that a thing?

I had to latch on to some thing in that comment that didn't make my mind's eye angry with me. The English major in me rose to the surface and spared me the imagery.

pronounced like 'jealousy'

'jealous-e'

To me, the best part is the idea that that was a common curse at the time.

I STILL use that curse, man. Are you saying it's out of style nowadays? I probably told, like, 20 people today that they would have homosexual offspring.

Props for the coach driver's sideburns. That was totally how they were. I am English, I know these things.

Are you also nearly 700 years old?

They are called "mutton chops"

And I used to have them myself... and a top hat.
Well, I have a top hat now, but my facial hair is more a fu manchu and goatee combo now. I look less victorian and more like the forbidden lovechild of Dick Dastardly and a stage magician.

Why?

Alt Text: What Ray means to say is that the media have turned queer sexuality into a commodity.

I really like this alt text. Like, a LOT. I think I'm queer for it.

Ray is often more astute than he lets on.

Gladdington Castle is an unrealistic name for a castle of the 14th century. I know this is lame, but nonetheless...

While we're at it, Edward II died in 1327, succeeded by Edward III, who reigned for a good 50 years after that.

Though I guess it is never established that this is an English king, just a king who is in England.

Oh, also this is the King of English Cats, not of English people, so I don't even know why I'm bothering to post this. But I am.

The really funny thing about this is that Edward III, successor to Edward II, was gay. Even funnier is that it's a Braveheart reference ("Longshanks" was Edward II, his feminine son was Edward III), and Ray doesn't even notice.

A Chubby for both you and lastlarf for not only knowing your history, but for making me realize that part in Braveheart.

Wow wow wow. Edward I was Longshanks. Edward II was his gay, pretty-bad-at-being-a-king son, and Edward III was his very hetrosexual son who started the 100 Years War.

Wait! I am...

A HISTORY NERD

I'm curious as to why noone has pointed out that the word "queer" is not by far as frequently used for homosexuality in Britain, as it is in the USA. Or am I wrong? (I'm from neither place).

Everything you wrote in the above post is correct.

You are totally from history, dude.

Charles the Fair of France died in the right year...

A comment left by latterman was marked lame too many times and excluded. (marked lame by johnnybaverage, Dovey, PresterJohn, Tagrineth)

I lamed. Repeating a blah joke will not make it funny.

Seconded, and a chubby for you sir.

Sorry guys, I was pretty out of it and forgot I had posted it already. I still deserve some lames.

Your avatar makes me swat at my monitor every goddamn time.

That castle looks like it was screencapped out of a Super Nintendo game.

I'm sorry, Mario, but your sexuality is in another castle!

Mario's sexuality is not in question.

HE
IS
A
HOMEBOY

[IMGS OFF]

. .. ... So what if a generation in their family does NOT have a son before the age of twenty-six?

Maybe it transfers to adopted offspring or nephews or something. Not to mention any female children are carriers for the curse when they finally have a male descendant.

Gotta love that X Chromosome.

I disagree. The curse clearly states that it must be "sons of sons."

maybe having a son before the age of twenty-six is part of the curse.

Well, it was fashionable for a while to pretend not to be gay. Or maybe they donate sperm.

This curse is seriously lollin

So THAAATS how it happens.

Did the king know that his status would make the curse come true? Because if not, his dying words were basically the equivalent of "YOU PRIIIIIIIICK..!"

Telling someone off as you are dying is raw as hell. That's one good night into which you are not going even remotely gentle.

I think I'm going to start using the King's final words in everyday conversation from now on. That's how perfect they are.

i like the cook's hat and that he wears eyeglasses in 1328

The phrase "hot raisin pudding" is absolutely disgusting. It sounds like a euphemism for diarrhea.

Well, when you forget and leave off the seasoning, that's basically what it is.

I get the feeling that Ray is one of those people who decides what he's going to say and from that point on doesn't really listen except to tell when you're done talking so he can say it.

my zune is being shipped here as i type this.... i wonder where that fits in this dealie...

Is it all... British magical realism?

Kings need to be very careful. Even with the most common curses. Like if he says: Damn, I hate that prime minister. I hope he gets hit with a shovel, the guy might actually get hit in the head with a shovel!

For some reason, my inner ear surprised me with a very strange voice for Simon in the last panel. It was really dumb and raspy as hell, and I couldn't figure out where I had it from.
Coming back just now, the same thing happened, but now it becomes very clear to me that with his posture and undershot, thin musstache and glasses he is the spitting image of the Tourettes Guy (R.I.P. Danny). In my mind he's saying it like "Where's the paper towels??"
I am laughing so hard.